The mind of a narcissist when they start to miss you

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  • Опубліковано 5 січ 2025

КОМЕНТАРІ • 957

  • @HotTamaleez
    @HotTamaleez 7 місяців тому +804

    They don’t miss the authentic us, they miss what we gave them and how we made them feel.

    • @MentalHealness
      @MentalHealness  7 місяців тому +39

      😩

    • @michellehendrickson9652
      @michellehendrickson9652 7 місяців тому +14

      Yessssssss

    • @cameogutierrez3466
      @cameogutierrez3466 7 місяців тому +11

      💯

    • @lindsaydiscovers9842
      @lindsaydiscovers9842 7 місяців тому +52

      Right. Because they don't actually know the real you. You're just filling a role for them.

    • @HotTamaleez
      @HotTamaleez 7 місяців тому +24

      @@lindsaydiscovers9842 Well, I think my mom knew the real me. She just convinced herself I’m her enemy. I think the term is splitting. It’s easier for her to view me as all bad if I don’t meet her expectations once.

  • @gabrielleisdone2088
    @gabrielleisdone2088 7 місяців тому +618

    Narcissists miss the power that they had over us.

  • @moathhouse2546
    @moathhouse2546 7 місяців тому +368

    The moment when you no longer Care FEELS SO GOOD

    • @pamelahunter4203
      @pamelahunter4203 7 місяців тому +10

      Yes. That part. 😃

    • @cutelatina10
      @cutelatina10 6 місяців тому

      OMG! This is so true! Indifference is the past to freedom!

    • @Ediwow-nx8iy
      @Ediwow-nx8iy 6 місяців тому +13

      Exactly. Mine just messaged me, giving his new number after discarding me again,months ago. But this time, I'm closed doors because I realized who he really is after a longgg time... Then, I woke up, I'm awakened and don't care anymore.

    • @Tlj4722
      @Tlj4722 6 місяців тому +6

      I CONCUR❤😂

    • @mariachiguira2k
      @mariachiguira2k 6 місяців тому +3

      100%

  • @patriciadooley3058
    @patriciadooley3058 7 місяців тому +608

    First of all they don't miss you! They miss what you can do for them.

    • @Timewithmabel
      @Timewithmabel 7 місяців тому +23

      Exactly

    • @MentalHealness
      @MentalHealness  7 місяців тому +14

      😩

    • @markjayw666
      @markjayw666 7 місяців тому +26

      They are stupidly short term thinkers. Nothing good in life comes from short term.

    • @EBexotic1
      @EBexotic1 7 місяців тому +17

      Period point blank they miss the benefits 💥 pow

    • @tawnytirado143
      @tawnytirado143 7 місяців тому +9

      Mine misses me doing the dishes😂

  • @FresnoCruz-yo5yn
    @FresnoCruz-yo5yn 7 місяців тому +223

    A narcissist loves you the way Dracula loves his victim.

  • @efremcharlot9623
    @efremcharlot9623 7 місяців тому +280

    They miss the supply they don't miss you as a person

    • @MentalHealness
      @MentalHealness  7 місяців тому +5

      😢

    • @PS-qn4oz
      @PS-qn4oz 7 місяців тому +14

      My ex. I thought he was The Greatest Man Ever and he let that go to his head and tried to get with all these other girls. None of them thought he was all that great, so he kept coming back to me. I was truly that much of an idiot that I would build him right back up again, and he would take that supply to build his confidence....to go try and get himself someone richer, prettier, and smarter than me. Over and over. It's actually hilarious in retrospect. I was always in honors classes and thought I was smart. Meanwhile everyone felt sorry for me because I was the greatest fool of all time. I'm embarrassed to say this but I say it so no one else has to think they were the dumbest. It was me. Trust me, it was me.

    • @naledismith3726
      @naledismith3726 7 місяців тому +2

      @@PS-qn4ozyou and me both

    • @springfauna1465
      @springfauna1465 7 місяців тому +3

      ​@@PS-qn4oz Same here!! In fact, I was just starting to heal from one, and immediately fell for ANOTHER ONE!!! And I was in so much denial the second time, even though I recognized the pattern. I also heard a lot of different professionals say that narcs will deliberately go for the BEST of the BEST, and that even the best of us can be fooled! It didn't make me feel any better, LOL, but it's been an important part of my healing journey, for sure!! 😉💜 I wish you well!!

    • @cheburrell3989
      @cheburrell3989 5 місяців тому

      Facts

  • @bd6184
    @bd6184 7 місяців тому +298

    I think they miss you because they no longer know what you are doing because they are competitive. They don't want you to be doing well or better than them.

    • @helenfalco7601
      @helenfalco7601 7 місяців тому +19

      Hell Yes! And absolutely.

    • @IsabellaPiesch
      @IsabellaPiesch 7 місяців тому +12

      I am sorry but I quitted the competition. I never wanted to be in a competition in fact. You know it is not about doing well or better - it is about HEALTH. The problem of a narcissist is he can´t stop - so also the health will suffer ... (also they have many addictions - not healthy ones).

    • @bosshogg1155
      @bosshogg1155 7 місяців тому +7

      I was told by the narcissist she didn’t want to see me treating somebody else better than I treated her.

    • @SusieBear-ji3hq
      @SusieBear-ji3hq 7 місяців тому +7

      ​@@IsabellaPieschdang right all these how to get revenge on the narcissist videos I never wanted a war of words or mind games winning all that bs it's enough all I have gone thru and now the mess he left behind that I gotta clean up(⁠ب⁠_⁠ب⁠)

    • @jennifs6868
      @jennifs6868 7 місяців тому +3

      100%

  • @loveofmylife1578
    @loveofmylife1578 7 місяців тому +259

    They miss the validation, money and cheeks

  • @r26oni-rn6sr
    @r26oni-rn6sr 7 місяців тому +174

    My ex was a neglectful narcissist.
    He 'missed' me so much, he got some random coworker pregnant and decided to marry her and move in with her. The second that baby was born he left her and the baby. Accountability was never his thing. I looked her up and realized she looked just like me, long dark hair and all. Poor girl didn't realize who this crusty dusty nasty brat was and I feel bad for her and her baby. He tried coming back to me shortly after. I made it very clear, no thank you. I found better :)

    • @MentalHealness
      @MentalHealness  7 місяців тому +8

      🫨🫨🫨🫨😩😩😩

    • @justjessie7824
      @justjessie7824 7 місяців тому +10

      It's so crazy because after I left my abusive narcissistic fiance he started dating someone who looks JUST like me. We have 2 kids together, she has 3 of her own. He isn't even there for his kids with me. Nothing makes sense lol

    • @TheMisswoods86
      @TheMisswoods86 Місяць тому

      Weird. I once read somewhere that narcs will try to find someone that resembles their best supply. Tell me why the new girl has characteristics that kind of remind me of myself. He'll soon find out that her having physical traits similar to mine will not make her morph into me.

  • @Annie-ol3jx
    @Annie-ol3jx 7 місяців тому +232

    Narcissist don't miss you they miss the control that they once thought they had over you. If you manage to break away from them and move on with your life and be happy,thats POWERFUL!! You are important, you are kind, you are smart,you matter. STAY GONE, I WILL BE COMING UP ON 6 YEARS IN JULY OF NO CONTACT!!! A BEAUTIFUL THING!!

    • @angelarios624
      @angelarios624 7 місяців тому +15

      I sure did move on, went no contact, ghost & he will never have access to me EVER!!! I took my power back..I won..😅

    • @Annie-ol3jx
      @Annie-ol3jx 7 місяців тому +7

      @angelarios624 yes,we all did! Continue moving on and being happy.

    • @reneebrown9451
      @reneebrown9451 7 місяців тому +11

      Why are narcissistic people so mean? If I didn’t do what he said he would look like a demon and start yelling

    • @NickeyVamp
      @NickeyVamp 7 місяців тому +15

      Still working on my no contact it is hard.. it has been 4 months but I am doing well.

    • @ericheffner112
      @ericheffner112 7 місяців тому +13

      You've GOTTA stay strong. When tempted think of all the bs they put you through. You have to break that trauma bond Love! The hoover is real. It's gonna come out of nowhere. ☝🏾🙏🏽

  • @lisadevillers47
    @lisadevillers47 7 місяців тому +232

    They miss what they don't get from you, but not you

  • @mreaglesfan5866
    @mreaglesfan5866 7 місяців тому +96

    They only miss you whenever that other situation fails

    • @MPachent
      @MPachent 6 місяців тому +1

      This PART 😄 & have the NERVE to THINK you should fill the void that fell through THERE #BitchSwerve 😁

    • @nic2535
      @nic2535 5 місяців тому +2

      @@mreaglesfan5866 correct

    • @myonlinetherapysessions9668
      @myonlinetherapysessions9668 3 місяці тому

      Exactly

  • @MarkAble8
    @MarkAble8 7 місяців тому +102

    Missing you - meaning missing THE CONTROL OF you. It’s crucial to understands narcissists cannot love. Lying and conning you into believing they love you is the trap. They’re people of the lie. Never, ever, forget that.

    • @MentalHealness
      @MentalHealness  7 місяців тому

      🫣

    • @br0broe436
      @br0broe436 7 місяців тому +4

      You’re completely right about this! They’re empty

    • @basicinfo2022
      @basicinfo2022 5 місяців тому +1

      👏👏👏 yes it's control, not love. Love is not abuse.

    • @Oceansgreen
      @Oceansgreen 4 місяці тому

      Yes, I think you’re right… after 36 years I don’t think my narc x ever loved me… looking back, you don’t treat ppl that you love the way I was treated.

  • @nikkitran3501
    @nikkitran3501 7 місяців тому +188

    Move on and never look back ..

  • @raylacoyle
    @raylacoyle 7 місяців тому +70

    My narcissistic husband parked his car at a bar last night and just came home today, knowing that I'm off of work today he walked in and asked me if I want to spend time with him today... for the first time in many years I said "no"
    He was shocked, I told him that I am done being his part time wife and I have friends that want to spend time with me, he was shocked and I will admit it felt good, now is time for me too start trying to heal

  • @lunaleia952
    @lunaleia952 7 місяців тому +33

    Four months ago, my narcissist and I stopped talking. I loved him, but it was hopeless. The breakup was extremely difficult, but we both managed to stop contacting each other.
    Now, I have a new man who is a wonderful lover and completely uncomplicated.
    If you can’t take it anymore, don’t be afraid; life goes on, and you will be happier without the pain. You just have to endure the beginning because you miss a narcissist like a drug due to the emotional roller coaster.

  • @MONEYM723
    @MONEYM723 7 місяців тому +86

    I want to throw up. Just the thought of him “missing” or even “thinking” about me makes me sick to my stomach. Please don’t miss me ever

    • @NopeNotTodaySatan
      @NopeNotTodaySatan 6 місяців тому +4

      😂😂😂 OMG I almost spit my drink out!!! Lolol I feel the same way!!! 🤢

    • @MONEYM723
      @MONEYM723 6 місяців тому +1

      @@NopeNotTodaySatan So serious. Just don't. Every now and then (whenever we do speak) he will end the conversation with "Yeah yeah I love you too" and i will literally almost throw up just hearing it. Im praying i can get over that feeling one day but our son is 15. So im almost to the finish line. We only speak once or twice a year anyways and its only for the dumbest reasons.

    • @NopeNotTodaySatan
      @NopeNotTodaySatan 6 місяців тому

      @@MONEYM723 - You’ve got this!!! I’ve know how hard it can be. It’s a horrible feeling. My ex just sent me ANOTHER ridiculous message & I feel literally sick to my stomach, not playing. They’re screwed up people. Don’t respond unless it’s for your child. Speak to him like it’s a business transaction when you have to. No feelings at all. You’re almost at the finish line like you said. I promise it gets better!!! Be the bigger person & don’t ever say anything about your him to your Son. He will realize on his own all of the truth. Been there myself, he’s 21 now & sees everything for what it is. Stay strong Mama!!! 💖💖

    • @tammydietschweiler7852
      @tammydietschweiler7852 4 місяці тому +1

      Right, please please please don’t miss me! I don’t need to know…😂

    • @LadiiRis793
      @LadiiRis793 3 місяці тому

      Same, he still has both of my numbers in his phone after no contact in almost 2 years. 😫

  • @taj6892
    @taj6892 7 місяців тому +101

    They don't miss you, it's them trying to see if they can wheel you back in

    • @MentalHealness
      @MentalHealness  7 місяців тому +4

      🥴

    • @tinygold772
      @tinygold772 5 місяців тому +1

      They also might need you to triangulate with their current partner… they’ll make sure they see their “ex” contacted them (not the other way round) to make new partner insecure - especially if they are getting out of line

  • @melodysanquist4834
    @melodysanquist4834 7 місяців тому +122

    If I lost my chef, servant and the ability to have access to bank loans I would miss ‘that’ too.

    • @olgadewitt9462
      @olgadewitt9462 6 місяців тому +4

      😂😂😂this is was BEST comment! Bravo 👏 👍

    • @celiajames600
      @celiajames600 6 місяців тому +2

      This!

    • @NopeNotTodaySatan
      @NopeNotTodaySatan 6 місяців тому

      Right?! Ignorant a$$es, they think we’re stupid 🙄 I told my ex - I’d miss me too!! Lol

    • @tinygold772
      @tinygold772 5 місяців тому +2

      😂😂😂

    • @SachaPerry-r5l
      @SachaPerry-r5l 5 місяців тому +1

      Nice one!

  • @Nicole-h2v
    @Nicole-h2v 7 місяців тому +90

    This man is trying to bully me into taking him back. Talking bout some "ain't nothing out there". Like sir, you treated me like garbage I'll take my risks

    • @getboogie1950
      @getboogie1950 7 місяців тому +12

      Ahahahahhaaaaa! Tell him "YOU out there" 😂😂

    • @LowellHancock
      @LowellHancock 7 місяців тому +7

      Ain't nothing out for them because they are losers 😂

    • @desertangelfish140
      @desertangelfish140 6 місяців тому +6

      8 billion people on this Earth! Someone new is out there looking for us! 😺

    • @rashidarowe7882
      @rashidarowe7882 6 місяців тому

      He told me if I leave him I might end up with a man who will give me aids, excuse me, you shady as shit so cant I get it from you as well....

    • @chinadoll534
      @chinadoll534 6 місяців тому +1

      I know right

  • @honorrasch-gush4817
    @honorrasch-gush4817 7 місяців тому +140

    I'm reaching 3 months of no contact 🎉 he is still with the new supply. The longer he stays away the stronger I become. I need this time so if he pops up, I will stay no contact.

    • @nunofigueira8691
      @nunofigueira8691 7 місяців тому +4

      God bless you ❤

    • @andreab7341
      @andreab7341 7 місяців тому +2

      You got this💪🏾

    • @Stayingsareene
      @Stayingsareene 7 місяців тому +6

      Same.. and I’m not looking back 💃🏿💃🏿💃🏿

    • @ItsSoarTime
      @ItsSoarTime 7 місяців тому +7

      stay committed to your self-care, self-improvementt, self-development. PEACE!!!!

    • @LisaKnauer
      @LisaKnauer 6 місяців тому +1

      I'm trying to stayno contact but I just saw him on my side of town(there's nothing over here but me) and he just glared at me. Now I miss him.

  • @briancorrer7775
    @briancorrer7775 Місяць тому +4

    Getting contact by the person who used you, abused you, lied to you, tried to give you std’s, abused the children, abandoned all of you, while they are crying saying they are so sorry they messed up and need you’re help and want you back because things didn’t work out with moving to Miami for new supply didn’t work out….is one of the most insane and validating things that’s ever happened to me. I didn’t take her back. Best decision of my life.

  • @melissabrzescinski494
    @melissabrzescinski494 4 місяці тому +9

    They only miss the attention, entertainment and gratification.

  • @patricialdv5220
    @patricialdv5220 7 місяців тому +74

    It's been 2 summers, never heard from him again after he cheated with multiple women and I told him to just STAY AWAY and leave me alone. He said horrible things about me. I was surprised and happy he stayed away. Guess who rang my door bell this weekend!? I did NOT answer, I turned the volume up on my TV. I can't believe he would show up like that. 🙄

  • @AliceLytle
    @AliceLytle Місяць тому +6

    What “I miss you” really means to a narcissist: I miss what I can extract from you in narcissistic supply. I miss controlling you. I miss having someone I can look down on. I miss how you make me feel.

    • @MsMoni226
      @MsMoni226 25 днів тому +1

      He told me after we got back together several times… “l missed how l felt being around you”… Narcissistic red flag!!!! 🚩

  • @thewhiterabbitrepresentative
    @thewhiterabbitrepresentative 7 місяців тому +109

    Narcissists don't miss you, they miss the pawn of off-shored emotional pain management via abuse they had made out of you

    • @helenfalco7601
      @helenfalco7601 7 місяців тому +6

      Omy! I read this 5x! Holy crap! you nailed it.They use you as an emotional punching bag for their pain and distraction! So evil.

    • @thewhiterabbitrepresentative
      @thewhiterabbitrepresentative 7 місяців тому +4

      Pure evil lol

    • @chellotrevino7323
      @chellotrevino7323 6 місяців тому

      😂😂 yah just sensitive all my exs were narcs and all of em ran from me 👊🏃‍♂️

  • @louiseramsey1571
    @louiseramsey1571 7 місяців тому +120

    A Narcassist will miss.......the use of you...end off. 🙏

  • @michellehendrickson9652
    @michellehendrickson9652 7 місяців тому +86

    They DON'T MISS YOU .. THEY MISS WHAT U CAN DO 4 THEM WHEN THEY NEED U BACK FOR SOMETHING

  • @loveofmylife1578
    @loveofmylife1578 7 місяців тому +51

    They miss what you provided for them

  • @LeLeB37
    @LeLeB37 7 місяців тому +98

    Just had a narc contact me after no contact for several years to tell me his mom died. I felt bad but I did not respond. Nothing but a hoover.

    • @LeLeB37
      @LeLeB37 7 місяців тому +20

      Man if shows up to my door he's gonna be upset bc I moved 2 weeks ago😂😂😂

    • @Mindsetolympics
      @Mindsetolympics 7 місяців тому +5

      STay strong ❤

    • @treshasstarr1513
      @treshasstarr1513 7 місяців тому +11

      DO NOT RESPOND, not even condolences….death is inevitable 👀

    • @chrissemenko628
      @chrissemenko628 7 місяців тому +5

      I'm so emotionally detached from him now that I'm the type who would probably have the decency to at least respond. "im sorry for your loss" (as both my parents are gone)
      I know how it feels.
      It's the right thing to do when another human being is in pain.🤷‍♀️
      That being said..
      Key is COMPLETE emotional detachmfrom him now is all that gives me this strength.

    • @MentalHealness
      @MentalHealness  7 місяців тому +2

      🙏🏽

  • @nc8414
    @nc8414 7 місяців тому +30

    They miss that they cannot use us anymore. They feel sorry for themselves

  • @HULovingLife
    @HULovingLife 7 місяців тому +45

    I’ve never been happier in my life since I blocked him and NEVER looked back!! ❤❤❤

    • @R.Francois
      @R.Francois 7 місяців тому +2

      Same here, blocked indefinitely!

    • @joyace9674
      @joyace9674 6 місяців тому +2

      And never again Amen 🙏

    • @AngiebLee-to3zi
      @AngiebLee-to3zi 5 місяців тому +2

      When I left I never looked back the calls never stop coming and I went no contact after he abandoned me when I had breast cancer was never there for me not one appointment not one surgery I love a year in 7 months ago and never look back in my healing process

    • @HULovingLife
      @HULovingLife 5 місяців тому +1

      @@AngiebLee-to3zi I am so happy for you. I experienced the same in the sense that I did everything for him if I needed anything, he was never there and I cannot tell you how much happier I am. I really love my life and I am truly happy now. never looking back is the best thing that you could do for yourself and you will find great happiness and your life and healing too. Being around a narcissist or psychopath can debilitate a person mentally physically etc. good for you never look back. 🥰🥰🥰

  • @beauxjenkins6238
    @beauxjenkins6238 7 місяців тому +87

    Please don't miss me....for any reason for every reason.

  • @patriciamurray1967
    @patriciamurray1967 3 місяці тому +8

    They miss whatever supply in whatever form that took, sex,money, sympathy, empathy, compassion, whatever but they don't miss you the person inside, because they NEVER connected to you for real in the first place!

  • @MeJones-i5u
    @MeJones-i5u 7 місяців тому +67

    He said do they miss the clapping of the cheeks😂😂

  • @raevinmanning641
    @raevinmanning641 7 місяців тому +51

    In my opinion they miss you like a junkie misses a “fix”.

  • @lindafrabizio2910
    @lindafrabizio2910 7 місяців тому +61

    Liars and BS artists. ! Use people for their needs to be met !

  • @kyki8512
    @kyki8512 7 місяців тому +71

    Lee I applud you for not being afraid to say that a narcissist can miss you! I believe that some content creators who speak on narcissism try to avoid saying things like "The narc can miss you" because they are afraid that it will make someone go back to a bad situation! But I believe that it is best to be honest and not make the narc seem like they are somebody who is above having human feelings, with some kind of superpowers! 🙄🥴🥴🥴
    I read a lot of comments and some survivors were automatically saying that the narc doesn't miss them for the right reasons, which IS TRUE! BUT........ any of the survivors of the narcissist who says they miss the narcissist is not missing the narcissist for the right reasons either! What are they missing? Does the survivor of the narcissist miss the abuse? Do they miss being treated badly? Of course not! And if the answer is the effect of tramabonding, then that means that both the narcissist and the survivers can BOTH miss each other for the WRONG reasons because it was a toxic relationship in the first place! Just saying!

    • @mimiwillms3920
      @mimiwillms3920 7 місяців тому +8

      Yessss I asked myself why did I love him . What’s good about his personality.. the only thing I could think of was “ when he is happy and smiles it’s great” few and far between . Not worth going back

    • @kyki8512
      @kyki8512 7 місяців тому +3

      @@mimiwillms3920 Exactly! 💯🎯👍

    • @browneyes9507
      @browneyes9507 7 місяців тому +3

      Yessssssss!!!!!

    • @frana.4086
      @frana.4086 6 місяців тому +1

      I still love my narc. Don't we all deserve to be loved? Dam! I sound like my mother who enabled my brother!

    • @kyki8512
      @kyki8512 6 місяців тому +3

      @@frana.4086 A narcissist is not seeking to be loved, a narcissist wants to be worshipped!

  • @sphedigitalmarketer5754
    @sphedigitalmarketer5754 7 місяців тому +20

    They miss how you made them feel. Once the other supply is no longer with them... They start to think of you.

  • @frehatipu9187
    @frehatipu9187 7 місяців тому +19

    I agree with Lee. We had such nice times together, that I know he misses me, because I organised it all!

    • @MentalHealness
      @MentalHealness  7 місяців тому +1

      ‼️

    • @PsychedPerspective
      @PsychedPerspective 7 місяців тому +3

      Lol right! The suspected narc I dealt with couldn’t be bothered to plan or initiate any dates. If we went on a date it’s bc I planned, I initiated and paid for the date. I was the one always buying gifts 🎁 and spending time with them. Yet he couldn’t be bothered to reciprocate effort. Very one sided.

    • @frehatipu9187
      @frehatipu9187 4 місяці тому

      @@PsychedPerspective sorry to hear that. Same here 😔

  • @eliza_kai
    @eliza_kai 7 місяців тому +18

    One thing I’ve learned to be truth more than anything is their “ego” is a false ego. Underneath that fake ego is a scared, insecure, traumatized little boy that is afraid of rejection. Hence, the constant, need for supply. I used to always say what the hell makes me any different than all the rest of them? Nothing. Just that I married him. And birthed our children. Snotting, begging, pleading, please, please, please…please don’t bruise my baby ego and make ME look like the bad guy. So infuriating. Once the truth is revealed, you can’t unsee it. I’ve been taken to the actual depths of hell and somehow am still standing. It takes an act of God to get away. Especially the covert ones..man…hell.

  • @heneverforesakesme4038
    @heneverforesakesme4038 7 місяців тому +31

    narcs don't miss YOU, they miss the supply

  • @jessicawilson8114
    @jessicawilson8114 7 місяців тому +32

    They miss bullying you

  • @FeatherWolfGraphicDesign
    @FeatherWolfGraphicDesign 3 місяці тому +4

    They miss what you can provide for them.

  • @Lizafitch
    @Lizafitch 7 місяців тому +40

    They always say you live in the past 😢

    • @MentalHealness
      @MentalHealness  7 місяців тому +2

      😫

    • @kabscool1
      @kabscool1 6 місяців тому +2

      So true

    • @frana.4086
      @frana.4086 6 місяців тому +5

      And want to move on rather than discussing their shit!

    • @racerx2348
      @racerx2348 5 місяців тому +6

      so true, its because the past keeps repeating itself. lie after lie. after lie

  • @Mike-gv8ip
    @Mike-gv8ip 6 місяців тому +12

    They miss that they don’t have control over you, and they wonder if someone else is really making you happy. They don’t like that.

  • @pamelahunter4203
    @pamelahunter4203 7 місяців тому +11

    One day at a time. Just getting out of a friendship or situation that wasn’t going anywhere. It took years to break this cycle. It hurts because so much time and energy was invested but it’s definitely something I will grow from and I know I will be better for it. Put yourself first - no one is worth the sacrifice of self.

  • @jacquelinefroehle5868
    @jacquelinefroehle5868 7 місяців тому +34

    To behave "Better than"...they always need a person to shove down and call them "less than"....when they have no one to play that evil game,,,,sure they will remember you were the one they controlled, lied to, used, and abused. They NEED someone to abuse, so that they can stay in the One Up position. Don't trust anything they say or do ever.

  • @cristolcarol9710
    @cristolcarol9710 7 місяців тому +35

    You're already broken in. New supply is still in training. It's easier and safer to take off their mask in front of their already broken victim- you. They'll even take out wrath on you that was caused by the new supply, so they don't have to reveal the demon to new new yet. And to add the cherry on top, they give any positivity you deserve to the new supply. So tortuous and exhausting. Stay safe and stay strong fam.

  • @ms.berryfearless8120
    @ms.berryfearless8120 2 місяці тому +5

    They miss you because they start to feel lost without you because you’ve become a lifeline to them.. they need u to function…

  • @5433cl13
    @5433cl13 3 місяці тому +3

    Bruh! Your acting skills are hilarious when doing the groveling voice, "I want you back..." I could watch that part on repeat smh. Nice balance of lightheartedness regarding a sensitive topic for newly enlightened overcomers.

  • @texan903
    @texan903 7 місяців тому +35

    A narcissist won't miss you as long as they have sufficient supply. Once their supply dries up, they'll test the water with you to see where you stand with them. This is the fork in the road. If you reach out to the narcissist, you have given them the green light to continue misbehaving. When they reach out to you, the ball is in your court to outline your terms should you welcome them back. With a narcissist, you have to make sure to keep your upper hand.

    • @MentalHealness
      @MentalHealness  7 місяців тому +6

      stay prepared

    • @tinygold772
      @tinygold772 5 місяців тому +4

      Not true they always have supply! Even with current partner they will have other supply! Back burners & ex’s who are replying to random messages - no narcissist ever has only ONE source - so they do contact when they are involved with many others - maybe they need the last ex to reply to triangulate the new - if they only ever focussed on one supply they would be monogamous and not do all that behind your back stuff they did! Be aware is right!

    • @babydii3487
      @babydii3487 4 місяці тому +5

      Just leave the whole situation alone babe. Upper hand this and that will break your spirit and sanity. Focus on the Lord and live for him not for the company of demonic beings

    • @tinygold772
      @tinygold772 4 місяці тому

      @@babydii3487 yes! The Lord saved me I couldn’t get out - I prayed to the Lord please Lord take over free me from this and He made a way.

  • @mskathryn231
    @mskathryn231 7 місяців тому +14

    My ex narc misses all the stability. On his own he can't function.

  • @DulcesSweets
    @DulcesSweets 7 місяців тому +14

    "Out of sight, Out of Mind!" So, so true!

  • @wearearmywearefamily5254
    @wearearmywearefamily5254 7 місяців тому +51

    Every two weeks I get a "hello" message from a random number that I ABSOLUTELY know it's him. He uses this other number because we have a no contact court order and I can't prove its him. I never respond. He's pathetic

    • @MentalHealness
      @MentalHealness  7 місяців тому +7

      stay safe

    • @nunofigueira8691
      @nunofigueira8691 7 місяців тому +4

      Block her phone number😊
      My ex-wife break-up our marriage and leave me 7 month ago with a 2 years old baby girl.
      Now she starting send me picture of me and my daughter, like found this picture in her by accidente phone. I just ignore her.

    • @Orquet-qj2nf
      @Orquet-qj2nf 7 місяців тому +2

      I recommend taking it to the police, if only to have them document it's happening.

    • @frana.4086
      @frana.4086 6 місяців тому

      Dam! That must have been my narc too! 😂😂😂

    • @wearearmywearefamily5254
      @wearearmywearefamily5254 6 місяців тому

      @@nunofigueira8691 I never respond

  • @chloellebond5682
    @chloellebond5682 7 місяців тому +24

    Just when I thought the hoovering stopped, got a random blocked vm asked for me to find it in my heart to reach back out and say hi. Needless to say, didn’t find it in my heart. I refuse to be a convenience.

  • @nathroypalmer3944
    @nathroypalmer3944 7 місяців тому +40

    I fell for the marriage proposal after that snot nose crying. I bought the ring a week later just to prove to her that she can't handle a relationship. A week later she's gone with another guy

    • @LS-fs6nc
      @LS-fs6nc 7 місяців тому +2

      😮

    • @MikeJackson690
      @MikeJackson690 7 місяців тому +1

      Did you keep the receipt?

    • @nathroypalmer3944
      @nathroypalmer3944 7 місяців тому +9

      @@MikeJackson690 yes I did but I didn't return the ring. I keep it as a reminder that she could not go through with it. It gives me strength to resist her hovers.

    • @shawndarodgers939
      @shawndarodgers939 7 місяців тому

    • @synaesthesia4183
      @synaesthesia4183 4 місяці тому +1

      Ouch...fuck, I'm so sorry

  • @ARodriguez-qq6os
    @ARodriguez-qq6os 4 місяці тому +3

    They miss their ego being caressed.

  • @brookeplifts
    @brookeplifts 7 місяців тому +15

    I just had a counselling appointment Tuesday and deadass the second I left and was about to start driving home, my ex texted me saying he’s fine with me hating him and ignoring him, and then said cuz he’s not good with words he sent me a playlist of all songs that remind him of “us” and “our relationship”. Perfect evidence of 2 things: 1) he still misses me cuz I’ve been no contact since December 29th (2023) and he can’t go even a month without contacting me, and 2) he clearly has not matured or changed for the better despite him claiming he’s in counselling for the breakup

    • @MentalHealness
      @MentalHealness  7 місяців тому +1

      🎯🎯

    • @Orquet-qj2nf
      @Orquet-qj2nf 7 місяців тому +1

      He's lazy, too. Instead of using words, he's making references to prepackaged sentiment that other people put the work into. Useless sod.

  • @Oceansgreen
    @Oceansgreen 4 місяці тому +17

    I honestly don’t think narcs are human, no matter what happens to them, it never seems to bother them, they just move on as if nothing’s happened, no emotions, no nothing… same when their marriage/relationship fails…. Nothing, they just get on with their lives… no tears, nothing!!!

    • @Cy93
      @Cy93 Місяць тому

      True 😢

  • @misskeyla21
    @misskeyla21 3 місяці тому +4

    They miss how they can play us

  • @OldFordTaurus
    @OldFordTaurus 7 місяців тому +17

    What you said about the “ equal opportunity cheater” really made me laugh

  • @bonezbaaaby
    @bonezbaaaby 7 місяців тому +7

    UGH. My ex today. You're such a blessing and you're doing GOD'S WORK with this channel. Thank you.

  • @nicolebeard6051
    @nicolebeard6051 7 місяців тому +6

    After I separated from my ex-husband, he reached out several times to say he missed me. This was even after I blocked him. He texted me from different numbers to say he missed me. Nope, I didn’t fall for it! He just missed having access to me. He missed the supply, as you stated.

  • @MegaRose1958
    @MegaRose1958 7 місяців тому +10

    Lee I love your demonstrations of Narcissists. 😂😂😂 It's been almost two years for me and I continue to get stronger everyday. Yes you are right, just because you have a PTO you can't go to sleep!! You must stay alert!!

  • @pjmrees
    @pjmrees 6 місяців тому +4

    That was my Nex FAVORITE statement, "Stop living in the past" (but he did the same behavior 5 minutes ago) It was absolute INSANITY! I tried to reason with him but it is an impossibility if you weren't willing to suspend reality, and I wasn't.

  • @ellenlegree8053
    @ellenlegree8053 7 місяців тому +9

    They miss using people

  • @mrnt1257
    @mrnt1257 7 місяців тому +18

    I let go of the past when I left him

  • @jacobdiaz7999
    @jacobdiaz7999 7 місяців тому +7

    I always got, "let's wipe the slate clean." Because her treatment was in the past and I needed to let it go.

  • @earthangel8399
    @earthangel8399 7 місяців тому +38

    Beware of the crying proposal.... it's bs

  • @Jcm1900
    @Jcm1900 7 місяців тому +14

    You sound just like my narc ex I escaped after 16 years. Hilarious and so true. I was crying but now laughing. Stay strong people. No contact and don’t take any nonsense from these people

  • @Jcm1900
    @Jcm1900 7 місяців тому +11

    I would love to hear something on narcs and verbal abuse

    • @MentalHealness
      @MentalHealness  7 місяців тому +2

      most of it's is verbal

    • @Greengourmet420
      @Greengourmet420 3 місяці тому

      So true, the verbal abuse gets
      worse when you start to break away

  • @SheilaGibson-s9h
    @SheilaGibson-s9h 7 місяців тому +9

    My ex-husband says that even if you're on fire I wouldn't even put you out. And somebody at work told him damn man. You must really miss her and he was angry about that statement

  • @MarciaSantos-ox1fk
    @MarciaSantos-ox1fk 7 місяців тому +27

    They don’t miss you- they miss the supply! They only come back with tails btwn their legs either bc they burned all the bridges with ALL the supply or they’re homeless. I don’t answer the door when he pops up for his things that he deliberately left behind or the calls from all the strange phone numbers! 😂😂 They’re pathetic!

    • @MentalHealness
      @MentalHealness  7 місяців тому +4

      🥴😂

    • @getboogie1950
      @getboogie1950 7 місяців тому +3

      Not the things he left behind! 😵😵😵 Mines left stuff, i knew, was on purpose. Throwed that shit rite in the trash...apple watch and all 😂😂😂

    • @MarciaSantos-ox1fk
      @MarciaSantos-ox1fk 7 місяців тому

      @@getboogie1950 okay 💅

    • @MarciaSantos-ox1fk
      @MarciaSantos-ox1fk 5 місяців тому

      @@getboogie1950 dat Ninja took my Apple Watch 🤣 but left his “drawz” behind acting like it was a fair exchange! 😒 Can’t stand dem! 😒

    • @getboogie1950
      @getboogie1950 5 місяців тому

      @@MarciaSantos-ox1fk yea took that watch so he can see what you doin…I cant stands em either 🤣🤣

  • @eboniemaugham6535
    @eboniemaugham6535 7 місяців тому +15

    Omg laughing my head off that bit 😅 it’s so true ! The cheating 14 times part 😂

  • @martinez7303
    @martinez7303 2 місяці тому

    I’ve heard it all and I’m cracking up because it’s so true. I see my scenarios. This is so on point it literally has me laughing because before I even knew what a narcissist was I thought I was crazy. I was so confused all the time conversations never made sense. and when I would try to pull away, the begging and guilt trips on me, always seem to be the conversation when it was him that was causing all the hurt and betrayal somehow was the victim

  • @AnaRose13206
    @AnaRose13206 7 місяців тому +18

    After years, he showed up on my people you may know, and I immediately blocked him! 🤣🤣🤣 not today, not ever Satan! If that was a test from the universe, then know that I’ve definitely learned my lesson! Good riddance and I hope I never have the displeasure of crossing paths with him ever again.

  • @heathersmith3290
    @heathersmith3290 2 місяці тому +1

    I get so confused. I go from realizing his actions are spot on these narcissistic behaviors and then I get to where I believe he’s a good person and that he really loved me and that I caused the problems. It’s been too long in my healing process I shouldn’t be stuck

  • @R.Francois
    @R.Francois 7 місяців тому +5

    They miss not being able to control you,

  • @journeywithyas
    @journeywithyas 3 місяці тому +5

    I don’t know whether I want to cry or laugh or puke cause this shit is so real 😅 what happens when a narcissistic realizes u can see right through them?

  • @redbeans747
    @redbeans747 7 місяців тому +6

    Everything your saying is truths im telling you im living this right now

    • @MentalHealness
      @MentalHealness  7 місяців тому

      ‼️‼️

    • @ladyCY413
      @ladyCY413 7 місяців тому +1

      So am I, I thought I was free from the toxicity but he forced his way back in the relationship without me never agreeing to make it work.

  • @SilvanaTr-c2q
    @SilvanaTr-c2q 2 місяці тому +1

    On the 3 minute you said how do we know if some narcissist misses us ,that we cant know ? Of course we know ,its thelephaty ,once you start thinking over someone ,it can be felt straight away ,no doubt 💯

  • @SheilaGibson-s9h
    @SheilaGibson-s9h 7 місяців тому +6

    I remember when I was little. I think it might have been 10 or 11. And I hear my mother in there. Screaming and upset and crying. She has a bloody nose about all over her face and stuff like that and My stepfather walks out of the room. I walk in there because she's screaming and crying. And my mother's holding a magazine and she's saying all I did was say that Denzel looked handsome in the magazine😮😮😮😮

  • @mjl6882
    @mjl6882 7 місяців тому +2

    Before I met this channel, I never know the word necrs, but since I started following I learn to know that all my confuse state of mind was due to married to someone who is a nercs, but I give thanks and praise to my creator am out of that toxic house, am feeling better, little by little everyday, thanks Mr Lee for your good job, really appreciate you

    • @Orquet-qj2nf
      @Orquet-qj2nf 7 місяців тому

      Dr. Les Carter from Surving Narcissism and Dr. Ramani are two other excellent sources. Between these three channels, I understand what happened a lot better.

  • @angelafrench8005
    @angelafrench8005 7 місяців тому +6

    I suggest that you mind if the narc w their own trickery, lies, and games. I made it a very even playing field. He can't even play w me anymore. He's a shell! I destroyed him. I gave him an ED with the violence of my mental attack. It took me 11 YEARS!!! Now I was an OG before but I'm straight savage now. Thank you for spreading the information!!!!!

  • @geoffreyhoward4084
    @geoffreyhoward4084 5 місяців тому

    Man, I’ve been enjoying and Laughing and shaking my head with what I know now. I used to call my wife a Bully, now I know it was control. I left after seeing the last true side of a Narcissist! Thank You because I’ve never left her before and now I see her trying to send messages. I don’t answer.

  • @robertabrown4123
    @robertabrown4123 7 місяців тому +4

    Oh my goodness! It's in the past! Yep, heard that Sooo many times!!

  • @blondescorpion8940
    @blondescorpion8940 Місяць тому

    My first husband in 11 years never told me he missed me. Not once. But my second husband and serious relationship all said they miss me. I pray I catch you on live.

  • @EatingCleanKeto
    @EatingCleanKeto 6 місяців тому +5

    I’m dealing with a Covert. My question is WHY do I love this man? Is it because he is nice? I have left twice but I’m still here. Keeping my options open for Mr. Right but I’m in a position where I can’t get away from this person.

    • @mcleo9935
      @mcleo9935 4 місяці тому

      @EatingCleanketo,am in the same position

    • @ctnwsm
      @ctnwsm 4 місяці тому +1

      It all goes back to the love bombing. You always think that person will return. It won't happen. I went back numerous times and it gets worse everytime, until they just dog you to the point where you can't go back....You will get over this, stay strong .

  • @Stephanie-d8e5s
    @Stephanie-d8e5s 2 місяці тому

    This video is point on! My ex has been begging me to come back and I refuse each time! He claims he is going to change and he is sorry for the abuse and it is in the past! I left finally after 3 yrs because of abuse and my breaking point was catching him with another girl in my face! He has been stalking me, blackmailing me, and harassing me. I been trying to move on and trying to heal but he makes it so hard!

  • @ashleylawless6566
    @ashleylawless6566 7 місяців тому +6

    Omg the Even numbers got me lmao so true🤣 my ex was obsessed with even numbers. Made me laugh 😆

  • @Roxy_rich
    @Roxy_rich 7 місяців тому +1

    I love the reminders to not go back. Sometimes it’s needed fr fr. Mines tried reaching out I’m still standing strong 🎉❤

  • @whoaskedyou.
    @whoaskedyou. 7 місяців тому +25

    They don't miss you. My ex said he missed Me that's only because his living arrangement changed for worse after I left him.

    • @getboogie1950
      @getboogie1950 7 місяців тому +1

      Ahahahahhaaaaaa!!! Mines is now living with her grandmother...sleeping in the same bed...at 28. 😁

    • @whoaskedyou.
      @whoaskedyou. 7 місяців тому

      @@getboogie1950 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

    • @sarahh3061
      @sarahh3061 4 місяці тому +1

      Same here

  • @martinez7303
    @martinez7303 2 місяці тому

    It’s so hilarious because it’s so true. I’m literally cracking up because this is on point. It’s unbelievable how narcissist are. Literally insane. It’s crazy how they think and talk and what comes out of their mouth

  • @Garretsonk
    @Garretsonk 6 місяців тому +3

    Even cheater🤣💀😂😂 oh my goodness, I’m laughing so hard!!

  • @allisonb.8492
    @allisonb.8492 5 місяців тому

    Good morning . Love this channel, Lee. Yall, lemme tell yall, I was married to a narcissist for 22 years (since i was 21 yrs old - i am now divorced) and one time he was drunk and among many things he's said to me over the years, the one thing that stood out was when he said "ya know what....something that bothers me about myself is that I love people as if they were "things" and not people". He said he loved them like objects. Makes alot of sense. And another thing, he would never make eye contact with me.

  • @rochellebautista4758
    @rochellebautista4758 7 місяців тому +9

    My ex narc told me he missed me. He did reach out. Imagine getting a divorce because of his constant infidelity. Now, he thinks I'm going to be a side chick to the chick he cheated on me with. I can't make this up 😂😂🤣

    • @Motivation-_power
      @Motivation-_power 7 місяців тому

      Like what give them that mind

    • @nicholecornes1915
      @nicholecornes1915 7 місяців тому +1

      I know! Omg i told my husband Dont expect me to be here to be your dam side chick

    • @BUDbizWIZ
      @BUDbizWIZ 6 місяців тому +1

      My Nex did the same thing to me. 😮

  • @racieone7120
    @racieone7120 4 місяці тому

    The "are you willing to forget the past, I am" had me 😮😮. Because he could say this over and over, and then when he would get drunk, bring up stuff from 8 or 9 years ago. Then, an entire argument would ensue, and my responses would get me a fist to the side of my head. Somewhere that can't be seen. Dissolution in less than two weeks. 🎉 I finally started to respect and stand up for myself.
    Thank you for your work and for bringing attention to this.

  • @nadineo1983
    @nadineo1983 7 місяців тому +4

    It fuckin sucks. My 2 year old daughter sees a man with his kids and her eyes get all wide and she says, "mama, it's a daddy!" She doesn't understand what a daddy is. It feels like someone is taking my heart and twisting it. I feel so guilty for choosing him as her dad. He got another woman pregnant 3 months after our planned daughter was born and raises that child but not mine. My heart cannot describe the level of pain and rage that I feel towards him for my baby.

    • @foreveryoung6464
      @foreveryoung6464 4 місяці тому +1

      Mine getting 3 other women (prostitute) pregnant behind my back in 6 years relationship. Had no shame and moral. Never Ever one single apologize, he blame everything to me. Ever come back for about 6 months cause he promise to treat me better. But he treat me worst than ever. He discard me suddenly. 2 weeks later he reach me out like nothing happened. I said to him to stay away. It's over this time, your loss not mine.

  • @myriambarrera-montes4732
    @myriambarrera-montes4732 3 місяці тому

    I am grateful for the content you put out. I help me get through a break up. there were red flags of course. But I didn't know how bad it was until I stood up for my self. Thank you.