The silence treatment is the form of abusive, sign of weakness, And a weapon of people who don't know how to deal with their and others emotions. So sad how social media glorify it. Actually those who use silence treatment in order to "test" or cut of others after initial friendship... They are the Real narcissists who blame others of narcissism. If Iam uncomfortable with someone while I get to know him/her closer, first I tell it to the person, then I explain it what manner I don't like.... All what Is neccessary in communication between friends. Silence treatment is most coward way to end any relationships. Both parties have been involved in building up, breaking up is painful, nothing Fast track and easy.
@@PaXeGo when silence used deliberataly to avoid someone or to test someone's character - it's called silent treatment. Which silence Are you talkin about?
@@voiceofthesoil3131 inner silence. to decide to no longer swallow the baits a narcissist throws right at ya. its no treatment when done to protect oneself its only treatment to manipulate. For Example. i told my narcisstic mother im working on a DIY cat tree and i wanna get me 2 kittys in near future , like this year. everytime its not about her, shes leavin the conversation. Thats silent treatment. right ? so i didnt took that bait. few days later shes throwing the next bait. Are u having a cat that u working on a cattree ? like i just told u about that 2 days ago. so i decided to no react to that. because i already told her. so just like in the video . she couldnt stand to not know whats up. (she felt fear of replacement) and started to stalk me at my door. in that case i did decide for silence to instead for chaos.
Lol this is the truth. Its funny how when you be nice to then they start asking many questions or just important questions they dont havethe answers too.
At the time in the darkness, I thought it was Satan's influence testing my willpower. But God is all knowing...Romans 12:21 "Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good."
And Jesus dying for your sin belief is a narcissist religion. The merciful Creator wants repentance and to become a better being. No demigod can die for your sins.
Excuse me to correct it a little "when the evil can't make you a bad person otherwise, he makes you to be a Narcissist - a person assuming is right, a judgmental one, the one who withdraw the communication and blame the other one of demanding conversation to be back. Communication is the pillar of any relationship.
I went silent and no contact and now he is trying to get in contact with me I refuse I don't want evil and chaos in my life at all the devils advocate can stay outside he isn't my concern no more
After being texted that I am Medieval, unscientific ,told I need therapy and I'm naive.....I paused,then texted back "text someone who cares." One week silent, so nice, no criticism ❤and sooo peaceful!!!
Once I got silent it meant I was preparing for a divorce. He thought he trained me to be obedient. The divorce was a shock to him lol. No contact for two years and it was the best decision of my life.
Narc don't like sick people, i underwent surgery...very complicated breakup...he cheated, denied it, came to meet me with a hickey and told me it was a bruise...instead of telling me that he got someone new all he did was to make me understand that i need to go now...he left me into confusion, turned my brain upside down. Im 4 months into it....getting better, listening to music that i used to listen before i met him in my life. Though i still have nightmares...i am getting through it. Im in NC since february...i dont think he will call me since i know that narc does not like sick people. The damage that he caused to me is much more painful than my operation...can you imagine ?. Thanks, i dont want to see him nor hearing his voice....when he comes in my mind my heartbeat races...traumatised
Ya, if you're trying to get rid of a narcissist, tell them you need a ride to a doctors appointment & you need them to cook supper for you. 😂 You'll never see them again.
I walked away and went silent on my ex and his family. Blocked them out of my life including the past friends. I am happy and doing what I love. I am really happy that people are being aware of such people thanks to videos like this.
Yes i did that too.. i erased her cellphone # on my phone and i didnt even memorize her number. I deleted all her pics and our pics together, i blocked her # and her niece, totally I don't want to hear anything about her, or seeing her face, i am done with her now and i just want to focus on myself paying attention with my job, loving my self, turn onto the Lord..
My grandfather never spoke. He had a separate bedroom. He took separate vacations. He lived a separate life. Had separate friends that she was not privy to. Yet lived under the same roof. He never spoke to anybody in the family because he knew if he did, my grandmother would screw it all up. Never expressed any emotion. He knew what he was dealing with. So it came as a big shock when he died of natural causes on the couch one night. As a child, I thought it odd. But as an adult, I realize now my grandmother was a narc and that's how he dealt with her. In the end, it was very effective.
Given that you said you were a child, everyone's motivations seem to be your reconstructions... I think that before framing someone as a narcissist - or the narcissist - you should carefully evaluate the possible interpretations and discuss them in depth at least with the rest of the family: from your summary, I (who don't know any of the characters!) I for one would say that, if there was a narcissist, it would likely be the one who lives as if in a hotel, undisturbed, served, who is not interested in his children and the rest of the family, who feels - and is! - free to lead an independent social life, to go on holiday on his own etc. And if your grandmother was grumpy, or nervous, or distant... or emotionally drained, emptied of affection and interests, tired, distressed... well, living at the service of a narcissist who cares only of his commodities (and perhaps in private overwhelms you with humiliations) can bring some heavy relational flaw. I don't want to be polemical, just to give you an external impression and a possible alternative reading. I know that if you are here you have your burdens and are looking for explanations... I hope you will find clarity and strenght and soon be able to resume and redirect your journey in a healing and fulfilling direction.
Furthermore, there are cold people, with a bad character, lack of affection or incapacity to express it, or unable to live positive relationships, with various emotional, psychological, relational problems, without being narcissistic. Please forgive my bad english.
Mine was very good as a mime. He could do many voices successfully. I always told him he should be an actor or something. Turned out he was one in real life...
@@quasimodo614HOLY SHIT THANKS FOR POINTING THIS OUT!!!!!!!!! My ex was totally all over the place and even surpassed my own voice/tone when he mirrored me for the first few weeks DAMN! 😭 At this point I jusy get goosebumps and it feels icy cold to recapture this detail ewwwww (He claimed to be MtX bottom and I had to be the dominant FtM in the whole relationship fuck)
You are NEVER deleted from the narcissist's mind. They remain stuck with your introject for the rest of their days, no matter how long you've been gone.
they always think of you each time it goes wrong with the new supply if there is a new one. They always keep an eye on you if they see you doing well they are revengeful .they forget you because they never want you to forget them @sophiasdreamquinnblue8977
That is so true. I broke up with my last bf 4 Years ago. I had to plan this because the ywats before when i wanted to break up he broke his hand or closed me in in our apartment and took away my phone. So i planned to get out of this for half a year. The days after the break up we needed to talk about the stuff like when can i go into the apartment to get my stuff and he wanted to get me back. I didnt had the power to have conversations like that and 3 days after i went into the apartment to look after the cats we had and found several used condoms on the floor... They dont love you they need you. And if you think straight and are strong enough and they get it that they are not able to manupilate you anymore they replace you asap. Every half a year he gets in touch with me. In my streams or 2 months ago his "last ex girlfriend" wrote me about him ( i am pretty sure it was him directly writing to me) .. they always wanted to get you back because they need you! Not the opposite. You dont need them! They need you so bad. They will always try to come back and get back into your mind. They dont understand that they did tooo much and that the dust around them is away now and you can see the personality clearly.
This is my first time commenting. I have learned so much from your videos. Thank you. When you said, "Silence gives them power" that really hit home with me. My entire life I practiced "gray rock" with my parent. I only recently learned that term. When I was around them it was easier to let them do the talking. It's odd when you come to realize that your parent really doesn't like you or care about with you say. They did like to see/talk to my children. I wouldn't leave them alone with my children and if they spoke on Zoom I made sure to be in the room. I often had to intervene or discuss later with my children that what my parent said was mean or inappropriate. As my children got older and less entertaining to my parent, they started to say mean things about their appearance or tried to guilt trip and manipulate them. I recently went no contact with them and it's the best thing that I've ever done. I survived the abuse. I wasn't going to subject my children to it.
I believe in writing dull stuff back. One guy went on a rant about my age and weight. So I said, " 9:43 I got your text. I'm not doing anything interesting, just paperwork, why don't you do something good for your mum. Occupy yourself, read a book." Then I left my phone off. And blocked him etc. He drove around my neighbourhood so I parked my car out of sight for a bit, caught the bus and kept a low profile.
Oh, borderline stalking on top of the narcissism. Nice combo. I had a stalker but I made sure he never got to know me. I picked him out of police photos and they told me to literally run and seek safety if I ever encountered him again. A very violent bad person. Bet you he was a narc too.
Being with my ex narc for the past 8 yrs. made me observe this very pattern. I think they wanted to feel very important in a way that is disturbing. Instead of building trust with their intimate partners, they destroy the trust that they built with you (in that case lying when they tried to put you in their pedestal). Once they have a committed partner, they can’t stand being loved authentically by one person. Instead they go on and prey on other women that is susceptible to their love bombing. My ex narc was a compulsive pursuer in a relationship. He would go back and forth to the women he were involved before or try to meet women in complicated situation so that going public isn’t an option while having you as their main supply. In the end they destroy the very person that loved them. They are like toddlers testing your love for them. Showing and telling them you love them isn’t enough, they will cheat on your face to make you feel inadequate even if you are more than they deserve. They want to test your love for them so they keep hurting you and when you have enough of their abuse, you leave. Then they tell you, ‘you never loved me because you abandon me’. Well in fact it’s their actions and narcissistic behavior that made you leave or in other cases they discard you and will give silly reasons of the discard. Mine would use, ‘she’s crazy’, ‘she’s a nega-star’, ‘she insults me’, ‘she cheated on me’ et al. So with this pattern of infidelities and emotional abuse (who knows what else) it’s better to walk away. I did walk away and is now rebuilding my life with our daughter. We are struggling financially because I’m not earning enough to provide for my daughter but now we get to laugh and bring with us sunshine every day. No lies, no abuse and no fake love. We only live once, forgive yourself and move forward but never forget the lesson that narc abuse taught you. That is to respect yourself to walk away from what’s hurting and destroying you. That you deserve a life of solitude, happiness and love. Hugs*** :) Additionally I hired a private detective Barryinvestigation@gmail. com. Once I knew what the narc was up to, it got easier to get over that lying, cheating, sack of doo doo, loser. I didn’t need closure from the narc, I paid for it. Best money I EVER spent!
My goodness my life for the past 7 years. He ended up putting his hands on me. And I got a restraining order on him he was also an alcoholic like 2 pints of crown Royal a day. He can't come around our son and myself for a year.
Wow wow thank you so much for sharing what you went through with your ex narcissist. I really needed to hear that. I have literally broken it off with my ex narcissist after a 7 month relationship. I managed to hack into his Facebook and read all his sex chats between many many women. Starting from literally the day we first started dating going on for 5 months. Stopped end of June but he was still messaging girls but not sex talk. He said he stopped because he felt bad which was a lie he had not been working before but since end of June was working full time so probably never had time for it. It's still fresh the pain of betrayal and like you said fake love as I realized our whole relationship was based on a lie and he probably never even loved me. Well good riddance to him I'm now free to be happy again.
Danish! Thank you for all of your contributions, and your willingness to share details of what you have survived. I am so sorry you went through all of that, and it makes me even more grateful for what you did to overcome it well enough to be able to talk about it. Your father and my mother were very similar in how they managed, only your father sounds more calculated, whereas my mother was just pure nutso control at all costs chaos. My grandmother told me, 'Your mother lacks ruth, and it's my fault for spoiling her rotten'. I hope your life is better now. You are worthy of wonderful things. I bless you.
Danish, thank you, this is so very helpful! Broke up with a narc acquaintance recently. He respected my silence from January until Easter, then dropped a greeting card for Easter and some chocolate into my postbox = his way to hoover! I said thx by calling him. That's what he was waiting for. He called me yesterday to remind me to stay in contact with him - which I don't want! This time I ignore his call and stay silent, hopefully forever. He lives in my neighborhood. Next thing he will do is stalking me by watching my place from out the street or try to meet me somewhere in person. I know bc. it's about the third or fourth term of me trying to separate and to get rid of the lonely 79 year old widower. Grhh! - He's pushing my compassion buttons and if nothing else works he's playing the victim bc of various reasons: I'm ill; I lost my dog; I need some body-touch; I am so depressed and so lonely etc.! He is very sly/cunning in getting the supply he is needy for! You bet! 😢 But I learn to sly back! 😂❤🎉
If you answer you get inside his circle. If you want to ignore him you have to ignore his calls. Get a new phone number. It would get worse before it would be better. Put ring cameras on your home. Don’t tell anyone. My ex still stalking me 14 years after divorce. I called the police and police talked to him. He stopped. I don’t wish this to anyone. You must have boundaries and he can’t ignore them. They wanted attention even if is negative don’t give him a chance. I would move away from that area. They are millions of apartments in US. If you say someone you are not interested into a relationship they need to go away. If not you go away. Good luck! 🍀 He is not into you he just wants to make you pay for the emotional pain you caused him even if you didn’t do anything. It’s called narcissistic injury.
@@mariapilarmeI'm going to disagree about the moving away part. He's 79yo. Kick him in the balls & send him home limping. 😂 There is no reason to move anywhere.
@@glittergirl2098 Thank you much, 😊, I already have a dog! Big love there between my dog and I! I live alone but am not feeling lonely; except with the narc I feel loneliness!
I just went silent to match his silent energy. They don't like it and may post passive aggressive things on the internet. They feel entitled to you always initiating contact to validate their importance.
Heyy Sara. I recently got silent with my partner who usually is silent with me. First few days, she got triggered by my distance and even asked me about it but subtly i ignored her waiting for her to do more efforts. However, after 2 days despite she kept waiting for my replies, now suddenly she's showing me she's happy and is posting stuffs and suddenly now ignoring me. Is she playing my own game with me?
I watch these videos because they do help me with my healing but I don’t wish them any harm, karma none of that. In a way I am thankful because this experience has made me look within and realize what I need to work on. Boundaries, self love and awareness. I walk away taking accountability for my part. It doesn’t matter to me if they ever do. I’ve learned the lesson. I’m so ready to heal and move on with my life.
Yaahhh.. the damage has been done. Huwag n natin dpt balikan ang mga nangyari na. Kc wl n tayo magagawa pa. Ang tanging mahalaga ngayon is, present and future.. still blessed kc hindi hinayaan ni Lord na tuluyan tayong mapahamak..
Remember they are just overgrown babies! The less contact the better if they wanna start stalking well now u can just put em in jail not always easy but u will in the end
I went silent and no contact with my narcissistic brother and sister. They kept trying to bait me putting me down. I gave them no response. So they started attacking my children . that is not on
Ok. What about other point of view. Whose? Someone who Once used to be your friend? Sure their life depends on you. Sure they are victim of silent treatment. All the drama Is they want to know why. Why you go silent. Why you destroy friendship. If you don't tell, you're bad guy here. They don't know. They ask you the reason. Anger is emotion. Its part of relationship. Seeking for attention of loved one is natural. Silence is abusive. Now if you tell them you don't love them anymore and the reason behind... You're doing right. But hey people don't get cruel and Torture others while watching from afar.
I don't fight at all. Ever. Because that person isn't worth it. I stay silent and if I MUST address the person, it's on MY terms, and whatever that person says or the reaction is, that's totally irrelevant to me.
@@amaqueen9012 Oh absolutely. And my goal is to always demonstrate that I have a say in my reaction. Only I do. They don’t write scripts that I follow.
Narcissist hate silence it eats away at their soul when they don't know what you doing? Or worst their mind starts wondering maybe you moved on found someone new they are longer your main focus or prioriy they have been replaced ouch..
It's really quite funny.. I started doing this 2 days ago to my horrifically reinforced narcisist parents and then I see this video. This explained what I was doing because, honestly, I'm ready to accept homelessness because i feel powerless to them. I don't want to fight with them, and everything i talk to them about is turned around and used against me in surprising and cruel ways. I'm not even afraid of homelessness anymore because i think about it so often and ive mapped the area very well. So thanks for at least giving me a fighting chance!
Oh my gosh, the first one is such an eye opener. My boyfriend gets so stressed when i don't respond immediately to his calls or texts. The sad truth is he was a decent person until his brain was damaged in a crash...
Silence is golden, duct tape is silver. I was in a gaming community and after realizing a close friend in that community was abusing me emotionally and showing narcissistic traits, I left that community and have gone "no contact." I'm healing but I've found peace with a lot.
My evil “meat suit” actually said today, “I thought that’s what you wanted was for me to be silent.” This was after I asked him to stop slinging insults; I am getting out now!
This is true. my narcissistic relative lashed out at me one day in front of the family and instead of feeding into it, I looked at them and walked away. When I tell you the scream they hollered out when I walked out could heard a block away😂. They started screaming and crying like a toddler. At the time, I didn’t know they had narcissistic personality disorder but I knew something wasn’t right. And honestly after finding it out, it’s so much easier to deal with them….They are very predictable. But Now it’s the flying monkeys that annoy me 🤦🏽♀️
My mom gets angry if I don't keep up giving info to her or othewise give massive input to her existence or just keep up the convo that she can then judge, criticize and reject or treat like it was her input and she who said it. She might belittle what I say, my ideas and next moment present them as her own. She's like a parrot. I have learned that I have to push myself to limits to keep up with content to others or otherwise they'll get volatile, angry and explosive 😢
One gave me the silent treatment for the second time after I paid for an all expense trip🤔 I responded with NO CONTACT😂 ✌🏾✌🏾 Two years later, many lies later, smear campaigns and everyone still hearing about how I'm horrible for walking away and never speaking to her and flying monkeys again. But my life is extra beautiful absent of her in it💃🏿💯❤️💃🏿💯❤️💃🏿💯❤️
What u said is absolutely true. Just a couple of weeks ago only I came to know that I am living with the malignant narcissist. From the beginning I knew he has got some personality disorder but I didn't never know what exactly it was.. I started watching many videos regarding this and I feel that yours is the best one.
I'm moving in a month and it's been 1 week since i went silent and it's so healing and soothing. Not having to deal with them. I haven't told them yet that I found a place to live, keeping that my joyful secret for now.
In order to be able to meet them with geniun silence, you have to heal! Cause they see if you are doing this for real or not. When it is genuine it is not about punishing them, it is about they really don’t mean a thing. For real! Your genuine healed silence take ALL their weapons away from them
I started setting boundaries after the children moved out. I didn't care anymore. He burned the house down. Greatest gift I got. Nothing holding me to him or ou4 possessions. I am free✊👑👏⚡
You don't know how much this video can help me now. Is incredibly helpful. Thank you so much. It's really difficult to live like this having to choose our battles and measuring the mood in the air and trying to keep yourself out of the eyes of an emotional predator. Without this information is like being blind and lost in the jungle. Now I am going to answer your question: He's pretending nothing has happened and he keeps talking to me and he doesn't talk to my daughter since the last tantrum of his. Is horrible what he's doing. I am planning everything to put an end to this . I am making my movements. Isn't easy. But I am walking through it. He's punishing daughter for something that is completely his fault. Our daughter is an example, a good child as well as our son. He has never done that. Giving her the silent treatments and pretending she's invisible. She's resilient and both my kids have seen this N in action. I am supporting my kids. He won't get away with it. It's hard because you want things to be normal but the N gives you no choice. I can't tell the kids what he's doing is good. I can't help him anymore with his consequences. His trying to demonstrate he stayed because yes and he does whatever he wants. Mistreating me and acting mean against my kids. He knows if he argues or fights hard I'll give him hell. He knows I am not the same I was. He knows I don't want him anymore because vall the pain he caused and because now I know what this is all about. So he thinks it is ok to talk to me and punish my daughter with indifference. He came to say stupid things or to show me videos of jokes and I stayed gray but he is acting like he never did. He keeps going like nothing like he thinks I won't give him consequences. He knows silent treatments don't work with me anymore. He knows if he mistreats me my kids won't like it so he hates that. He's laying low. I am prepaying myself to live with my children. I noticed what you said. The contradiction there, is that my silence sometimes works sometimes it creates something else in his distort notion of reality And I need as you said to pick my battles. He feels he thinks I can't be bad. Well, I am not a bad person but I certainly can let him face consent as you mention. But I already called a free service lawyer with the state. I already have a small net of support and I already talked to him about economics and how the best option is for him to move out and leave me alone. He's not that stupid but at the same time he is. If you get to know about narcissists you will see many of them aren't that intelligent. You need sometimes to keep trying different ways to keep your peace and/ or win a battle. I am choosing both this time. I am not going to lose my apartment, this is my children's shelter. So he's leaving.. But it is still bothering me that he is acting like I am not defending my daughter. I am always taking care of my children. I just can't control the stupid things he does. If he leaves I'll tell him anyways. I am just picking my moment carefully to tell him this is more than the economic part this is the consequences of his abuses and immaturity. This is the result of his arrogance. And if he acts resistant I'll put a restraining order even if he didn't hit me physically because he had been hitting me and my kids personally, spiritually and emotionally and economically for years so. If he doesn't act the proper way, this time I will do what I have to do. I want him to know this is not one more situation I just let it happen. He knows I became empty for him. But he insisted on pretending like nothing and he was playing innocent when he clearly had done so much wrong and I know if I don't stand by myself he'll do it again.
❤❤❤ Thank you Danish you r truely my savior. Yes I have completely started giving My partner silent treatment and he is driven crazy trying to get out reactions from me. Let see what fate has to bless me 😂❤🎉
From lots of experience over the years, the biggest thing narcassists cant stand is silence. It eats away at them. They always need to have some sort of contact with you and reaction. They feed of it
When he discarded me and went silent I went crazy… It hurts so much I couldn’t stop writing him, seeking clarity, empathy, closure… And it bothered him even more
This is what happened to me. He then hoovered me again , but this time I tested him - I never sought any answers like you and I did , I just played normal like all was cool and he went silent on me. They are truly sick and just wanting their ego boosted. He is silent- I will be silent too. I will do it better. He made me feel weak like I was nothing. I'm taking my power back.
Danish I am doing xactly wat u said ..silence...cutting off...emotionally physically ...it is working....yaaayy ..the narc is crumbling....can see him falling apart..gone into depression...and I am watching his karma taking over ... ..
I like that drip supply advice- i had not heard of that before I am currently recovering from having to navigate tolerating the attendance of a sibling plus his family of toxins at our shared mother’s funeral- they previously behaved clearly that i was not any value to them inviting everyone except me to the daughters wedding- i did not care about going to the wedding but the absence of invitation was a glaring obvious statement and hurt a lot but cemented clarity and i in return chose to block them from being a part of my circle as my personal boundary And so here we all were forced into a shared event and i knew they would act fake as if they could act like they could hug me as tho the higher class citizens than i am again It was extremely difficult as i knew any contact towards me was not for my benefit and only to charade themselves in their fake self exalting egos Knowing about this drip supply idea is very helpful as i didn’t want to make a scene so i allowed a half hug from the main predator because she initiated it but I ignored my sibling - but as a Christian thats now tied me into flashbacks like a trauma along with their flying monkeys also making a beeline towards me - Are you able to do a video on how to navigate attending a funeral that you dont want to miss but the loved one is shared with the attendance of toxic family that you went no contact with
Thank you so much for breaking this down. I have listened to dozens of sites. None have ever differentiated Between situations that require pushback As opposed to silence against the Narcissist.
Starting from scratch, I spent 4 years working day and night about narcissism, learning all the information and now I have become a professional expert in the field of Narcissism.
I believe you may be able to answer this question … after over two months … of a potentially great relationship. She ghosted me … instead of telling me why … she ghosted … she told other mutual associate that it was all my fault …i never saw the discard or slandering comin….which is WHY it affected me so deeply … thus im still watching all these vids on this Narcissist PD…whats her nxt move ? From your experience and expertise … shes 62 fairly attractive … super easy for her to snare new supply… stupid question but i gotta ask … do you think she’ll want my supply again or is she Totally thru with me?
@@dnotesdnotes8245 Thank you so much, I love helping people the right way. I understand that you were with a NARCISSIST for only 2 months, then the narcissist took your energy, joy, smile and happiness and left after using you, right?? I understood this from what you wrote. I apologize if I misunderstood... Now I wish you a speedy recovery and I understand you very well. You feel as if a giant public bus has run over you. Don't be afraid, your narcissist partner will definitely come back to you. But I have very bad news for you... When he comes again, he will beg you. He will apologize. He will cry and when you refuse, he will lie at your door for 3-5 days... If he convinces you and you accept this lie and pity him and GIVE HIM AGAIN CHANCE, THE NARCISSIST WILL COMPLETELY DESTROY YOU PSYCHOLOGICALLY. it darkens your life
@@dnotesdnotes8245 I give you very good and I trust you.. I know what you are going through.. I live in Amsterdam, NETHERLANDS and my PhD thesis at the university is ABOUT NARCISSIST. I gave FULLY 4 years. In the first years, I did not understand anything, then I thought calmly and understood everything very well and I succeeded.. I AM TRYING TO HELP THOUSANDS OF PEOPLE.
So trying this right now. finding a Narc is an opportunist who will just get on with it. But you totally right in that the unpredictability really rattles them. Will update.
After three times he kicked me out of his house in the middle of the night claiming he couldn't stand seeing my face,controlling every move I made,controlling my friendships, my phonecalls, my family, after multiple times he flirted with random women right in front of me, other so many times he flew into narcissistic rage just hecause I said no to his many demands, things I bet sound painfully familiar to many of you, I chose to hang up on him while he was screaming his lungs out through the phone,block all his numbers, cut off all bridges that serve communication and going literally on radio silence . Its been eight days of blissfull peace, quiet and silence in my own place still going 💪💪, while my head slowly is restoring funcions and no sign of him still. I think I took the right decision for once in my life . Do I miss him? I sure do. But I've missed me more.
Yes, they do panic and become anxious because they've lost control of you. When they view your silence as a sign of agreeableness...they're lying to themselves. Their massive ego is unwilling to accept your failure to obey them. Silence is your superpower, use it and watch them implode.
I was raised by two narcissistic parents. I was discarded by both of them recently. I am protecting my children. They deserve better. I deserve better. Thank you for helping me move forward.❤🎉I'm very happy knowing the truth now 😊 I no longer carry the burden of my parents actions
You are the master Danish. I love the content you supply. It's absolutely bang on to my experiences with these people. Thank you very much it's very reassuring
I grew up with a narcissitc family, my parent siblings and husband tried their best to keep me in the box, I received brilliant counselling, narcissism is a mental health issue ❤🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏
you have great exposure and knowledge about narcissistic person i really amazed after watching your videos i watched your many videos and now have better understanding regarding those persons ....i personally experience those toxic peoples and they badly effect me and destroy my mental health .
I’m not sure I agree. My silence works perfectly for me. I don’t need to push any buttons. I don’t need to set my boundaries or clarify anything to them. I don’t need to respond or retaliate. This only creates a single response in which you have broken the no contact rule. The golden rule is, ignore the bully and the bullying gradually diminishes. I don’t care what they think. It’s none of my business. My peace and my personal space is, my business. Continually focusing on my peace, indeed and quite possibly enrages them and eats away at them but - most importantly, it helps maintain a healthy and carefree lifestyle for me.
Going silent, has felt like a heavy weight has been lifted off of me, literally. There’s definitely a demonic chain that is broken when you finally shut the door on the relationship.
I just realized something. By "NC" you don't mean North Carolina. You mean No Contact. I was wondering why everyone was going to North Carolina. I was like "Are there not any narcissists in North Carolina?" Hell, I was about to pack up & move there myself. Then it finally hit me you guys are saying "No Contact." 😂 It's all making sense now.
Thank you Lord I needed this I'm just experiencing it and just realizing that within the last 2 years but really the last year thank you for this information and insightfulness
I was there for my narc ex through everything healthwise and helping him with his anxiety. We have been on and off for years but after my divorce he came back again.We were happy for 8 months. One night we had a stupid fight and didnt talk for two days. He invited me over only to tell me he cared about me, still wanted to "check in on me from time to time", and thinks about me all the time but he was NEVER coming back. But the following days he proceeded to message me on and off all day like nothing changed. I finally blocked him on my phone and social media. It's only been a week and im struggling but i know its the right choice.
Talk about spiritual abuse. They will even go as far as trying to put spells on you just to get their way. You will be under great attack. Please stay prayed up.
I went silent on my mother, who is a narcissist. She has since tried to buy back into my favor, fake nice in front of people with gifts but no real changed behavior or apology. She comes around when it looks good to other for her to do so. I've accepted her gifts, but I've told my husband it doesn't mean she will be able to buy her way back into my life. She has since used other people in the family like my grandmother to guilt trip me and manipulate me to accept her back into my life and her treatment of me. I refuse.
I recently cut my narc mother out of my life. She treated me like shit and will never have the chance to do it again. She taught my brother how to guilt-trip people. But because I'm aware of such methods of manipulation, I laugh to myself when my brother tries to guilt-trip me. It's truly pathetic. How awful of your mother, trying to get other members of the family to manipulate you. I'm glad that you recognize exactly what she's trying to achieve - and that you're immune to her BS. Just as I'm immune to my family's BS.
The silence has been wonderful and nice i don't have to deal with difficult situations anymore that was too much for me! No contact means to me happiness and peace no more gaslighting or any more mind games no more acting ! No contact means no more listening to someone talking about things that i don't want to hear or listen to! Or talking about other women besides me making me feel like nothing! No contact means no more love Bombing anymore! No more listening to someone talk about their own self Centered talk about themselves To other people who have no idea that that this person is not a good friend and is indifferent to you or anyone else who doesn't understand what or who this person really is! And that is a narcissist person !!
Master Coparenting with a Narcissist
www.emotionalabuserecovery.com/specialoffer
Danish don't choose this colour for shirts it does not fit you . The model is nice the colour does not suit you .
Are there any free resources for people who don't have the money to buy the workshop?
@@fightback3971❤
🤣🤣🤣🤣
Assalam o alaikum.. i need your help..
My silence speaks and I don't care what the think or say. I choose my peace over chaos
ppl trying to disturb our peace will bite their teeth without any succes
The silence treatment is the form of abusive, sign of weakness, And a weapon of people who don't know how to deal with their and others emotions. So sad how social media glorify it. Actually those who use silence treatment in order to "test" or cut of others after initial friendship... They are the Real narcissists who blame others of narcissism. If Iam uncomfortable with someone while I get to know him/her closer, first I tell it to the person, then I explain it what manner I don't like.... All what Is neccessary in communication between friends. Silence treatment is most coward way to end any relationships. Both parties have been involved in building up, breaking up is painful, nothing Fast track and easy.
@@voiceofthesoil3131 we talkin about silence and u turn it into silent treatment. well nice try
@@PaXeGo when silence used deliberataly to avoid someone or to test someone's character - it's called silent treatment. Which silence Are you talkin about?
@@voiceofthesoil3131 inner silence. to decide to no longer swallow the baits a narcissist throws right at ya. its no treatment when done to protect oneself its only treatment to manipulate. For Example. i told my narcisstic mother im working on a DIY cat tree and i wanna get me 2 kittys in near future , like this year. everytime its not about her, shes leavin the conversation. Thats silent treatment. right ? so i didnt took that bait. few days later shes throwing the next bait. Are u having a cat that u working on a cattree ? like i just told u about that 2 days ago. so i decided to no react to that. because i already told her. so just like in the video . she couldnt stand to not know whats up. (she felt fear of replacement) and started to stalk me at my door. in that case i did decide for silence to instead for chaos.
Silence is golden. It’s giving you the space to heal. It’s powerful protection.
Definitely!!…I’ve used it countless times & never fail me lol!😅👍👍
Yes I use silence everyday it helps me have peace of mind
The silence has been such a blessing I should’ve done this sooner pulled away because now I feel wonderful
U too?😊
@@LysaChampioneI feel at peace and healing. Narc can't touch me since I established boundaries I chose me !
@@Xenlacasa45 we deserve it!!
@@LysaChampione they look so drained and depleted without our supply they are energy vampires
@@Xenlacasa45 they should look and get it somewhere else..
Access denied with this one .. Sorry not 🚫 Sorry 👍😊🦋✅😎
Blessings 💖 💯🏆😇🙏
"They are a parasite in need of a host". Best description ever!
They only communicate when they need something so I don’t care how they respond to my silence.
Lol this is the truth. Its funny how when you be nice to then they start asking many questions or just important questions they dont havethe answers too.
Asking where his clothes are. 😂
the Bible says, "Resist the devil and he will flee from you." GOD said that. So, resist the narcissists and they will flee.
Yep rebuke and call God
Perfect and YES!!!!
Amen 🙏
At the time in the darkness, I thought it was Satan's influence testing my willpower. But God is all knowing...Romans 12:21 "Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good."
And Jesus dying for your sin belief is a narcissist religion. The merciful Creator wants repentance and to become a better being. No demigod can die for your sins.
When the devil can't get you, he uses a Narcissist 👌
Facts!! 💯💯
True.
Excuse me to correct it a little "when the evil can't make you a bad person otherwise, he makes you to be a Narcissist - a person assuming is right, a judgmental one, the one who withdraw the communication and blame the other one of demanding conversation to be back. Communication is the pillar of any relationship.
Correct ❤
True
I went silent and no contact and now he is trying to get in contact with me I refuse I don't want evil and chaos in my life at all the devils advocate can stay outside he isn't my concern no more
Me too
The smear campaign could be next. Going through this and it makes you feel so isolated
They never realize their mistakes
After being texted that I am Medieval, unscientific ,told I need therapy and I'm naive.....I paused,then texted back "text someone who cares." One week silent, so nice, no criticism ❤and sooo peaceful!!!
Yay! 🎉🎉🎉😊 happy for you!
Who says medieval 😂
Wow periodt 💅🏾
Once I got silent it meant I was preparing for a divorce. He thought he trained me to be obedient. The divorce was a shock to him lol. No contact for two years and it was the best decision of my life.
Same!!!!!!
Same😂
Well done 👏. Best of luck in your future 🤗
Exactly they think once u stop talking that means you doing what they always wanted for you to shutup whole time u emotionally exhausted and done
Amazing ❤
I am like a lioness with my silence. 😂 thank you.
Narc don't like sick people, i underwent surgery...very complicated breakup...he cheated, denied it, came to meet me with a hickey and told me it was a bruise...instead of telling me that he got someone new all he did was to make me understand that i need to go now...he left me into confusion, turned my brain upside down. Im 4 months into it....getting better, listening to music that i used to listen before i met him in my life. Though i still have nightmares...i am getting through it. Im in NC since february...i dont think he will call me since i know that narc does not like sick people. The damage that he caused to me is much more painful than my operation...can you imagine ?. Thanks, i dont want to see him nor hearing his voice....when he comes in my mind my heartbeat races...traumatised
Sry love, you deserve better!
@@MissPhiomena thank you. A positive thing about this horrible journey is that I am getting closer to God, I read my Bible everyday.🙂
Amen... Psalms 23 will help you 💕
Ya, if you're trying to get rid of a narcissist, tell them you need a ride to a doctors appointment & you need them to cook supper for you. 😂 You'll never see them again.
You know what? Just 3 words- f*ck that guy!! 😀😀😀 Sending hugz 😘😘😘
I walked away and went silent on my ex and his family. Blocked them out of my life including the past friends.
I am happy and doing what I love.
I am really happy that people are being aware of such people thanks to videos like this.
Amen exactly what I do to retrieve peace 🙏🏿
Yes i did that too.. i erased her cellphone # on my phone and i didnt even memorize her number. I deleted all her pics and our pics together, i blocked her # and her niece, totally I don't want to hear anything about her, or seeing her face, i am done with her now and i just want to focus on myself paying attention with my job, loving my self, turn onto the Lord..
SILENCE is Gold.
My silence saved me by 99.9%
giving silence is taking our power back 😌 3:49
Proverbs 18:1
An unfriendly person pursues selfish ends and against all sound judgment starts quarrels.
My grandfather never spoke. He had a separate bedroom. He took separate vacations. He lived a separate life. Had separate friends that she was not privy to. Yet lived under the same roof. He never spoke to anybody in the family because he knew if he did, my grandmother would screw it all up. Never expressed any emotion. He knew what he was dealing with. So it came as a big shock when he died of natural causes on the couch one night.
As a child, I thought it odd. But as an adult, I realize now my grandmother was a narc and that's how he dealt with her. In the end, it was very effective.
Was your grandmother a good cook?
Wow!!! 🤦🏽♀️
I think I’m getting to be like your grandpa. Maybe I’ll die like him too.
Given that you said you were a child, everyone's motivations seem to be your reconstructions... I think that before framing someone as a narcissist - or the narcissist - you should carefully evaluate the possible interpretations and discuss them in depth at least with the rest of the family: from your summary, I (who don't know any of the characters!) I for one would say that, if there was a narcissist, it would likely be the one who lives as if in a hotel, undisturbed, served, who is not interested in his children and the rest of the family, who feels - and is! - free to lead an independent social life, to go on holiday on his own etc.
And if your grandmother was grumpy, or nervous, or distant... or emotionally drained, emptied of affection and interests, tired, distressed... well, living at the service of a narcissist who cares only of his commodities (and perhaps in private overwhelms you with humiliations) can bring some heavy relational flaw.
I don't want to be polemical, just to give you an external impression and a possible alternative reading. I know that if you are here you have your burdens and are looking for explanations... I hope you will find clarity and strenght and soon be able to resume and redirect your journey in a healing and fulfilling direction.
Furthermore, there are cold people, with a bad character, lack of affection or incapacity to express it, or unable to live positive relationships, with various emotional, psychological, relational problems, without being narcissistic.
Please forgive my bad english.
Danish make a video on how their voice changes when they want to impress someone.
Yes, Please do it's hilarious when they behave like clowns. Just sit back, stay silent and observe.
Oh yeah, so ridiculous 😆
Mine was very good as a mime. He could do many voices successfully. I always told him he should be an actor or something. Turned out he was one in real life...
@@quasimodo614HOLY SHIT THANKS FOR POINTING THIS OUT!!!!!!!!! My ex was totally all over the place and even surpassed my own voice/tone when he mirrored me for the first few weeks DAMN! 😭 At this point I jusy get goosebumps and it feels icy cold to recapture this detail ewwwww
(He claimed to be MtX bottom and I had to be the dominant FtM in the whole relationship fuck)
Yess!
You are NEVER deleted from the narcissist's mind. They remain stuck with your introject for the rest of their days, no matter how long you've been gone.
So true!!!
What does that mean? How do they exhibit this?
I agree..
they always think of you each time it goes wrong with the new supply if there is a new one. They always keep an eye on you if they see you doing well they are revengeful .they forget you because they never want you to forget them @sophiasdreamquinnblue8977
That is so true. I broke up with my last bf 4 Years ago. I had to plan this because the ywats before when i wanted to break up he broke his hand or closed me in in our apartment and took away my phone. So i planned to get out of this for half a year.
The days after the break up we needed to talk about the stuff like when can i go into the apartment to get my stuff and he wanted to get me back. I didnt had the power to have conversations like that and 3 days after i went into the apartment to look after the cats we had and found several used condoms on the floor...
They dont love you they need you.
And if you think straight and are strong enough and they get it that they are not able to manupilate you anymore they replace you asap.
Every half a year he gets in touch with me. In my streams or 2 months ago his "last ex girlfriend" wrote me about him ( i am pretty sure it was him directly writing to me) .. they always wanted to get you back because they need you! Not the opposite. You dont need them! They need you so bad. They will always try to come back and get back into your mind.
They dont understand that they did tooo much and that the dust around them is away now and you can see the personality clearly.
Silence is the best reply to a fool ❤
This is my first time commenting. I have learned so much from your videos. Thank you. When you said, "Silence gives them power" that really hit home with me. My entire life I practiced "gray rock" with my parent. I only recently learned that term. When I was around them it was easier to let them do the talking. It's odd when you come to realize that your parent really doesn't like you or care about with you say. They did like to see/talk to my children. I wouldn't leave them alone with my children and if they spoke on Zoom I made sure to be in the room. I often had to intervene or discuss later with my children that what my parent said was mean or inappropriate. As my children got older and less entertaining to my parent, they started to say mean things about their appearance or tried to guilt trip and manipulate them. I recently went no contact with them and it's the best thing that I've ever done. I survived the abuse. I wasn't going to subject my children to it.
GOOD FOR YOU!!!!
Good parent right here
I believe in writing dull stuff back. One guy went on a rant about my age and weight.
So I said, " 9:43 I got your text.
I'm not doing anything interesting, just paperwork, why don't you do something good for your mum. Occupy yourself, read a book."
Then I left my phone off. And blocked him etc.
He drove around my neighbourhood so I parked my car out of sight for a bit, caught the bus and kept a low profile.
Oh, borderline stalking on top of the narcissism. Nice combo. I had a stalker but I made sure he never got to know me. I picked him out of police photos and they told me to literally run and seek safety if I ever encountered him again. A very violent bad person. Bet you he was a narc too.
Being with my ex narc for the past 8 yrs. made me observe this very pattern. I think they wanted to feel very important in a way that is disturbing. Instead of building trust with their intimate partners, they destroy the trust that they built with you (in that case lying when they tried to put you in their pedestal). Once they have a committed partner, they can’t stand being loved authentically by one person. Instead they go on and prey on other women that is susceptible to their love bombing. My ex narc was a compulsive pursuer in a relationship. He would go back and forth to the women he were involved before or try to meet women in complicated situation so that going public isn’t an option while having you as their main supply. In the end they destroy the very person that loved them. They are like toddlers testing your love for them. Showing and telling them you love them isn’t enough, they will cheat on your face to make you feel inadequate even if you are more than they deserve. They want to test your love for them so they keep hurting you and when you have enough of their abuse, you leave. Then they tell you, ‘you never loved me because you abandon me’. Well in fact it’s their actions and narcissistic behavior that made you leave or in other cases they discard you and will give silly reasons of the discard. Mine would use, ‘she’s crazy’, ‘she’s a nega-star’, ‘she insults me’, ‘she cheated on me’ et al. So with this pattern of infidelities and emotional abuse (who knows what else) it’s better to walk away. I did walk away and is now rebuilding my life with our daughter. We are struggling financially because I’m not earning enough to provide for my daughter but now we get to laugh and bring with us sunshine every day. No lies, no abuse and no fake love. We only live once, forgive yourself and move forward but never forget the lesson that narc abuse taught you. That is to respect yourself to walk away from what’s hurting and destroying you. That you deserve a life of solitude, happiness and love. Hugs*** :) Additionally I hired a private detective Barryinvestigation@gmail. com. Once I knew what the narc was up to, it got easier to get over that lying, cheating, sack of doo doo, loser. I didn’t need closure from the narc, I paid for it. Best money I EVER spent!
My goodness my life for the past 7 years. He ended up putting his hands on me. And I got a restraining order on him he was also an alcoholic like 2 pints of crown Royal a day. He can't come around our son and myself for a year.
Wow wow thank you so much for sharing what you went through with your ex narcissist. I really needed to hear that. I have literally broken it off with my ex narcissist after a 7 month relationship. I managed to hack into his Facebook and read all his sex chats between many many women. Starting from literally the day we first started dating going on for 5 months. Stopped end of June but he was still messaging girls but not sex talk. He said he stopped because he felt bad which was a lie he had not been working before but since end of June was working full time so probably never had time for it. It's still fresh the pain of betrayal and like you said fake love as I realized our whole relationship was based on a lie and he probably never even loved me. Well good riddance to him I'm now free to be happy again.
I ruined my career because of my husband
Same here.. but im still on process of getting courage to leave.. god help me to escape from this abuse. We have two kids 😢
Danish! Thank you for all of your contributions, and your willingness to share details of what you have survived. I am so sorry you went through all of that, and it makes me even more grateful for what you did to overcome it well enough to be able to talk about it. Your father and my mother were very similar in how they managed, only your father sounds more calculated, whereas my mother was just pure nutso control at all costs chaos. My grandmother told me, 'Your mother lacks ruth, and it's my fault for spoiling her rotten'.
I hope your life is better now. You are worthy of wonderful things. I bless you.
Danish, thank you, this is so very helpful! Broke up with a narc acquaintance recently. He respected my silence from January until Easter, then dropped a greeting card for Easter and some chocolate into my postbox = his way to hoover! I said thx by calling him. That's what he was waiting for. He called me yesterday to remind me to stay in contact with him - which I don't want! This time I ignore his call and stay silent, hopefully forever. He lives in my neighborhood. Next thing he will do is stalking me by watching my place from out the street or try to meet me somewhere in person. I know bc. it's about the third or fourth term of me trying to separate and to get rid of the lonely 79 year old widower. Grhh! - He's pushing my compassion buttons and if nothing else works he's playing the victim bc of various reasons: I'm ill; I lost my dog; I need some body-touch; I am so depressed and so lonely etc.! He is very sly/cunning in getting the supply he is needy for! You bet! 😢 But I learn to sly back! 😂❤🎉
If you answer you get inside his circle. If you want to ignore him you have to ignore his calls. Get a new phone number. It would get worse before it would be better. Put ring cameras on your home. Don’t tell anyone. My ex still stalking me 14 years after divorce. I called the police and police talked to him. He stopped. I don’t wish this to anyone. You must have boundaries and he can’t ignore them. They wanted attention even if is negative don’t give him a chance. I would move away from that area. They are millions of apartments in US. If you say someone you are not interested into a relationship they need to go away. If not you go away. Good luck! 🍀 He is not into you he just wants to make you pay for the emotional pain you caused him even if you didn’t do anything. It’s called narcissistic injury.
Lol mine has told me every single excuse you listed.
@@mariapilarmeI'm going to disagree about the moving away part. He's 79yo. Kick him in the balls & send him home limping. 😂 There is no reason to move anywhere.
Get a new dog .. It will love You unconditional ❤️
@@glittergirl2098 Thank you much, 😊, I already have a dog! Big love there between my dog and I! I live alone but am not feeling lonely; except with the narc I feel loneliness!
You can't wrestle with pigs 🤣
So very true
🏆
As a country girl raised in the woods, you most DEFINITELY CAN wrestle with pigs.
😂🎉
@@mistyrain5882 😃and much more fun because real Pigs can feel emotions! There is probably a better chance of winning too! 😉
@@mistyrain5882 🥰
I just went silent to match his silent energy. They don't like it and may post passive aggressive things on the internet. They feel entitled to you always initiating contact to validate their importance.
Heyy Sara.
I recently got silent with my partner who usually is silent with me. First few days, she got triggered by my distance and even asked me about it but subtly i ignored her waiting for her to do more efforts. However, after 2 days despite she kept waiting for my replies, now suddenly she's showing me she's happy and is posting stuffs and suddenly now ignoring me. Is she playing my own game with me?
Yes, she’s knows your watching her profile and wants to get under your skin
Yes , they want a reaction
Yeah they play the same games harshly @@annshii6771
@@SaraX2024 it still effects your mind I think having to live like this.
I watch these videos because they do help me with my healing but I don’t wish them any harm, karma none of that. In a way I am thankful because this experience has made me look within and realize what I need to work on. Boundaries, self love and awareness. I walk away taking accountability for my part. It doesn’t matter to me if they ever do. I’ve learned the lesson. I’m so ready to heal and move on with my life.
exactly. forgiveness is the key.. i want nothing but the best for my ex wife of 12 yrs. let us all heal with a clean heart.
Yaahhh.. the damage has been done. Huwag n natin dpt balikan ang mga nangyari na. Kc wl n tayo magagawa pa. Ang tanging mahalaga ngayon is, present and future.. still blessed kc hindi hinayaan ni Lord na tuluyan tayong mapahamak..
Even if you go silent, they will someway, somehow cause drama and play the victim. It's as if their life depends on it.
Facts 💯. The craziest things is alot of males will team up with the spouses to do the drama together...
# pathetic
Remember they are just overgrown babies! The less contact the better if they wanna start stalking well now u can just put em in jail not always easy but u will in the end
I went silent and no contact with my narcissistic brother and sister. They kept trying to bait me putting me down. I gave them no response. So they started attacking my children . that is not on
Get the law and court involved with that, they both are desperate and pathetic for doing that@noelaustin4751
Ok. What about other point of view. Whose? Someone who Once used to be your friend? Sure their life depends on you. Sure they are victim of silent treatment. All the drama Is they want to know why. Why you go silent. Why you destroy friendship. If you don't tell, you're bad guy here. They don't know. They ask you the reason. Anger is emotion. Its part of relationship. Seeking for attention of loved one is natural. Silence is abusive.
Now if you tell them you don't love them anymore and the reason behind... You're doing right. But hey people don't get cruel and Torture others while watching from afar.
I don't fight at all. Ever.
Because that person isn't worth it.
I stay silent and if I MUST address the person, it's on MY terms, and whatever that person says or the reaction is, that's totally irrelevant to me.
FACTS. THEY ALWAYS WANT TO FIGHT!!!
@@amaqueen9012 Oh absolutely.
And my goal is to always demonstrate that I have a say in my reaction. Only I do. They don’t write scripts that I follow.
Narcissist hate silence it eats away at their soul when they don't know what you doing? Or worst their mind starts wondering maybe you moved on found someone new they are longer your main focus or prioriy they have been replaced ouch..
the peace is incredible! period.
Total silence
It's really quite funny.. I started doing this 2 days ago to my horrifically reinforced narcisist parents and then I see this video. This explained what I was doing because, honestly, I'm ready to accept homelessness because i feel powerless to them. I don't want to fight with them, and everything i talk to them about is turned around and used against me in surprising and cruel ways. I'm not even afraid of homelessness anymore because i think about it so often and ive mapped the area very well.
So thanks for at least giving me a fighting chance!
Oh my gosh, the first one is such an eye opener. My boyfriend gets so stressed when i don't respond immediately to his calls or texts. The sad truth is he was a decent person until his brain was damaged in a crash...
Boundaries; no contact; avoid; rebuke “ALL toxic relationships” #periodT
Your depth of knowledge over a seemingly simple word like silence is commendable. It is a marvellous drug which nullifies narcissism.
Silence is golden, duct tape is silver. I was in a gaming community and after realizing a close friend in that community was abusing me emotionally and showing narcissistic traits, I left that community and have gone "no contact." I'm healing but I've found peace with a lot.
Thank you Danish ❤ Please continue to share your knowledge to help people fight the demons of NPD to keep the struggle and survive. Include my self
My evil “meat suit” actually said today, “I thought that’s what you wanted was for me to be silent.” This was after I asked him to stop slinging insults; I am getting out now!
Creep
You sound like the narcissist here
They get dirty, try to be heard and same time command you to answer.
This is true. my narcissistic relative lashed out at me one day in front of the family and instead of feeding into it, I looked at them and walked away. When I tell you the scream they hollered out when I walked out could heard a block away😂. They started screaming and crying like a toddler.
At the time, I didn’t know they had narcissistic personality disorder but I knew something wasn’t right. And honestly after finding it out, it’s so much easier to deal with them….They are very predictable. But Now it’s the flying monkeys that annoy me 🤦🏽♀️
Eid Mubarak Danish and everyone who read this. 🎉❤
Eid moubarak ❤🎉
I wish. Danish makes videos in Urdu
Great advice, silence is a good tool. Have done both, kept silent but pushed back at the right time too.
My mom gets angry if I don't keep up giving info to her or othewise give massive input to her existence or just keep up the convo that she can then judge, criticize and reject or treat like it was her input and she who said it. She might belittle what I say, my ideas and next moment present them as her own. She's like a parrot. I have learned that I have to push myself to limits to keep up with content to others or otherwise they'll get volatile, angry and explosive 😢
One gave me the silent treatment for the second time after I paid for an all expense trip🤔 I responded with NO CONTACT😂 ✌🏾✌🏾 Two years later, many lies later, smear campaigns and everyone still hearing about how I'm horrible for walking away and never speaking to her and flying monkeys again. But my life is extra beautiful absent of her in it💃🏿💯❤️💃🏿💯❤️💃🏿💯❤️
Right on time!
What u said is absolutely true. Just a couple of weeks ago only I came to know that I am living with the malignant narcissist. From the beginning I knew he has got some personality disorder but I didn't never know what exactly it was.. I started watching many videos regarding this and I feel that yours is the best one.
I'm moving in a month and it's been 1 week since i went silent and it's so healing and soothing. Not having to deal with them. I haven't told them yet that I found a place to live, keeping that my joyful secret for now.
In order to be able to meet them with geniun silence, you have to heal! Cause they see if you are doing this for real or not.
When it is genuine it is not about punishing them, it is about they really don’t mean a thing. For real!
Your genuine healed silence take ALL their weapons away from them
You are doing great job. You are saving our precious life, saving our soul from narcissistic people. Thank you ! 😇🙏🏻
I started setting boundaries after the children moved out. I didn't care anymore. He burned the house down. Greatest gift I got. Nothing holding me to him or ou4 possessions. I am free✊👑👏⚡
Thank you Danish I am experiencing these issues as I write, your videos have been very helpful to me thank you.
You don't know how much this video can help me now. Is incredibly helpful.
Thank you so much. It's really difficult to live like this having to choose our battles and measuring the mood in the air and trying to keep yourself out of the eyes of an emotional predator. Without this information is like being blind and lost in the jungle.
Now I am going to answer your question: He's pretending nothing has happened and he keeps talking to me and he doesn't talk to my daughter since the last tantrum of his. Is horrible what he's doing. I am planning everything to put an end to this . I am making my movements. Isn't easy. But I am walking through it. He's punishing daughter for something that is completely his fault. Our daughter is an example, a good child as well as our son. He has never done that. Giving her the silent treatments and pretending she's invisible. She's resilient and both my kids have seen this N in action. I am supporting my kids. He won't get away with it. It's hard because you want things to be normal but the N gives you no choice. I can't tell the kids what he's doing is good. I can't help him anymore with his consequences. His trying to demonstrate he stayed because yes and he does whatever he wants. Mistreating me and acting mean against my kids. He knows if he argues or fights hard I'll give him hell. He knows I am not the same I was. He knows I don't want him anymore because vall the pain he caused and because now I know what this is all about. So he thinks it is ok to talk to me and punish my daughter with indifference. He came to say stupid things or to show me videos of jokes and I stayed gray but he is acting like he never did. He keeps going like nothing like he thinks I won't give him consequences. He knows silent treatments don't work with me anymore. He knows if he mistreats me my kids won't like it so he hates that. He's laying low. I am prepaying myself to live with my children. I noticed what you said. The contradiction there, is that my silence sometimes works sometimes it creates something else in his distort notion of reality And I need as you said to pick my battles. He feels he thinks I can't be bad. Well, I am not a bad person but I certainly can let him face consent as you mention. But I already called a free service lawyer with the state. I already have a small net of support and I already talked to him about economics and how the best option is for him to move out and leave me alone. He's not that stupid but at the same time he is. If you get to know about narcissists you will see many of them aren't that intelligent. You need sometimes to keep trying different ways to keep your peace and/ or win a battle. I am choosing both this time. I am not going to lose my apartment, this is my children's shelter. So he's leaving.. But it is still bothering me that he is acting like I am not defending
my daughter. I am always taking care of my children. I just can't control the stupid things he does. If he leaves I'll tell him anyways. I am just picking my moment carefully to tell him this is more than the economic part this is the consequences of his abuses and immaturity. This is the result of his arrogance. And if he acts resistant I'll put a restraining order even if he didn't hit me physically because he had been hitting me and my kids personally, spiritually and emotionally and economically for years so. If he doesn't act the proper way, this time I will do what I have to do. I want him to know this is not one more situation I just let it happen. He knows I became empty for him. But he insisted on pretending like nothing and he was playing innocent when he clearly had done so much wrong and I know if I don't stand by myself he'll do it again.
Silence is meaningless and useless without the accompanying lack of emotional response.
My silence and all my blocking remains very empowering to me. I cared/care zero whether they were/are reacting or not.
❤❤❤ Thank you Danish you r truely my savior. Yes I have completely started giving My partner silent treatment and he is driven crazy trying to get out reactions from me. Let see what fate has to bless me 😂❤🎉
Silence is the best weapon.
From lots of experience over the years, the biggest thing narcassists cant stand is silence. It eats away at them. They always need to have some sort of contact with you and reaction. They feed of it
It's like a game almost. Thank you for teaching me the rules!
When he discarded me and went silent I went crazy…
It hurts so much
I couldn’t stop writing him, seeking clarity, empathy, closure…
And it bothered him even more
This is what happened to me. He then hoovered me again , but this time I tested him - I never sought any answers like you and I did , I just played normal like all was cool and he went silent on me. They are truly sick and just wanting their ego boosted. He is silent- I will be silent too. I will do it better. He made me feel weak like I was nothing. I'm taking my power back.
They pretend it's bothering them , so you do it more and they are loving your response. Don't play their game
No contact. Remain NO contact.
Your channel is giving the much needed courage to face him. Thank you for being there ❤
Danish I am doing xactly wat u said ..silence...cutting off...emotionally physically ...it is working....yaaayy
..the narc is crumbling....can see him falling apart..gone into depression...and I am watching his karma taking over
...
..
I like that drip supply advice- i had not heard of that before
I am currently recovering from having to navigate tolerating the attendance of a sibling plus his family of toxins at our shared mother’s funeral- they previously behaved clearly that i was not any value to them inviting everyone except me to the daughters wedding- i did not care about going to the wedding but the absence of invitation was a glaring obvious statement and hurt a lot but cemented clarity and i in return chose to block them from being a part of my circle as my personal boundary
And so here we all were forced into a shared event and i knew they would act fake as if they could act like they could hug me as tho the higher class citizens than i am again
It was extremely difficult as i knew any contact towards me was not for my benefit and only to charade themselves in their fake self exalting egos
Knowing about this drip supply idea is very helpful as i didn’t want to make a scene so i allowed a half hug from the main predator because she initiated it but I ignored my sibling - but as a Christian thats now tied me into flashbacks like a trauma along with their flying monkeys also making a beeline towards me -
Are you able to do a video on how to navigate attending a funeral that you dont want to miss but the loved one is shared with the attendance of toxic family that you went no contact with
TREAT THEM WITH THE KINDNESS THAT THEY SHOW//
AND KEEP IT MOVING!!!
YOU HAVE WON!!!
Thank you so much for breaking this down. I have listened to dozens of sites. None have ever differentiated Between situations that require pushback As opposed to silence against the Narcissist.
The narcissist is the lowest life form.
Good description of this disease
Can’t be that low , boards are filled with posters who talk about brutal behaviour but somehow stay in relationships with them for 10. 20, 30 years.
Starting from scratch, I spent 4 years working day and night about narcissism, learning all the information and now I have become a professional expert in the field of Narcissism.
I believe you may be able to answer this question … after over two months … of a potentially great relationship. She ghosted me … instead of telling me why … she ghosted … she told other mutual associate that it was all my fault …i never saw the discard or slandering comin….which is WHY it affected me so deeply … thus im still watching all these vids on this Narcissist PD…whats her nxt move ? From your experience and expertise … shes 62 fairly attractive … super easy for her to snare new supply… stupid question but i gotta ask … do you think she’ll want my supply again or is she Totally thru with me?
Li
Huh?
@@dnotesdnotes8245 Thank you so much, I love helping people the right way. I understand that you were with a NARCISSIST for only 2 months, then the narcissist took your energy, joy, smile and happiness and left after using you, right?? I understood this from what you wrote. I apologize if I misunderstood... Now I wish you a speedy recovery and I understand you very well. You feel as if a giant public bus has run over you. Don't be afraid, your narcissist partner will definitely come back to you. But I have very bad news for you... When he comes again, he will beg you. He will apologize. He will cry and when you refuse, he will lie at your door for 3-5 days... If he convinces you and you accept this lie and pity him and GIVE HIM AGAIN CHANCE, THE NARCISSIST WILL COMPLETELY DESTROY YOU PSYCHOLOGICALLY. it darkens your life
@@dnotesdnotes8245 I give you very good and I trust you.. I know what you are going through.. I live in Amsterdam, NETHERLANDS and my PhD thesis at the university is ABOUT NARCISSIST. I gave FULLY 4 years. In the first years, I did not understand anything, then I thought calmly and understood everything very well and I succeeded.. I AM TRYING TO HELP THOUSANDS OF PEOPLE.
So trying this right now. finding a Narc is an opportunist who will just get on with it.
But you totally right in that the unpredictability really rattles them. Will update.
My mother! She is currently giving my brother & i silence & we are happy!
After three times he kicked me out of his house in the middle of the night claiming he couldn't stand seeing my face,controlling every move I made,controlling my friendships, my phonecalls, my family, after multiple times he flirted with random women right in front of me, other so many times he flew into narcissistic rage just hecause I said no to his many demands, things I bet sound painfully familiar to many of you, I chose to hang up on him while he was screaming his lungs out through the phone,block all his numbers, cut off all bridges that serve communication and going literally on radio silence . Its been eight days of blissfull peace, quiet and silence in my own place still going 💪💪, while my head slowly is restoring funcions and no sign of him still. I think I took the right decision for once in my life . Do I miss him? I sure do. But I've missed me more.
Yes, they do panic and become anxious because they've lost control of you.
When they view your silence as a sign of agreeableness...they're lying to themselves. Their massive ego is unwilling to accept your failure to obey them.
Silence is your superpower, use it and watch them implode.
I was raised by two narcissistic parents. I was discarded by both of them recently. I am protecting my children. They deserve better. I deserve better. Thank you for helping me move forward.❤🎉I'm very happy knowing the truth now 😊 I no longer carry the burden of my parents actions
Absolutely right. I learnt many things from your videos. Please suggest some ways that these monsters do not spoil innocent people's life.
This is so interesting.
You are the master Danish. I love the content you supply. It's absolutely bang on to my experiences with these people. Thank you very much it's very reassuring
They only pick fight either by crying or abusing
Yes. They are either the TYRANT or the VICTIM.
Brilliant, thanks so much!!
I grew up with a narcissitc family, my parent siblings and husband tried their best to keep me in the box, I received brilliant counselling, narcissism is a mental health issue ❤🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏
They are failures
Perfectly said 🎉
💯! 👍
you have great exposure and knowledge about narcissistic person i really amazed after watching your videos i watched your many videos and now have better understanding regarding those persons ....i personally experience those toxic peoples and they badly effect me and destroy my mental health .
Thanks Danish. Silence is golden.
I’m not sure I agree. My silence works perfectly for me. I don’t need to push any buttons. I don’t need to set my boundaries or clarify anything to them. I don’t need to respond or retaliate. This only creates a single response in which you have broken the no contact rule. The golden rule is, ignore the bully and the bullying gradually diminishes. I don’t care what they think. It’s none of my business. My peace and my personal space is, my business. Continually focusing on my peace, indeed and quite possibly enrages them and eats away at them but - most importantly, it helps maintain a healthy and carefree lifestyle for me.
You have helped me so much I cannot thank you enough
Going silent, has felt like a heavy weight has been lifted off of me, literally. There’s definitely a demonic chain that is broken when you finally shut the door on the relationship.
Your videos are gold …I always prefer listening to you than others psychologist..your storytelling is very strong
When I went NC with my abusive dad and grandma, they said it was me being VIOLENT
That makes no sense honey
Yes..even when it's clearly their own doing they try to put blame on you and tell all sorts of crazy lies about you. Be well.
I just realized something. By "NC" you don't mean North Carolina. You mean No Contact.
I was wondering why everyone was going to North Carolina. I was like "Are there not any narcissists in North Carolina?" Hell, I was about to pack up & move there myself.
Then it finally hit me you guys are saying "No Contact." 😂 It's all making sense now.
SAD
LOVE TO TURN THE TABLES
WHEN ITS REALLY THEM😳
Should have text them back saying "Whose this?" Lol
I'm so out of the loop on this and I love it !!
Thank you Lord I needed this I'm just experiencing it and just realizing that within the last 2 years but really the last year thank you for this information and insightfulness
This video comprehensive,, in-depth and profound. Thank you so much.
Impacted by silence
Your videos helped me a lot to heal and come out very confident and strong ❤
I was there for my narc ex through everything healthwise and helping him with his anxiety. We have been on and off for years but after my divorce he came back again.We were happy for 8 months. One night we had a stupid fight and didnt talk for two days. He invited me over only to tell me he cared about me, still wanted to "check in on me from time to time", and thinks about me all the time but he was NEVER coming back. But the following days he proceeded to message me on and off all day like nothing changed. I finally blocked him on my phone and social media. It's only been a week and im struggling but i know its the right choice.
Talk about spiritual abuse. They will even go as far as trying to put spells on you just to get their way. You will be under great attack. Please stay prayed up.
I went silent on my mother, who is a narcissist. She has since tried to buy back into my favor, fake nice in front of people with gifts but no real changed behavior or apology. She comes around when it looks good to other for her to do so. I've accepted her gifts, but I've told my husband it doesn't mean she will be able to buy her way back into my life. She has since used other people in the family like my grandmother to guilt trip me and manipulate me to accept her back into my life and her treatment of me. I refuse.
I recently cut my narc mother out of my life. She treated me like shit and will never have the chance to do it again. She taught my brother how to guilt-trip people. But because I'm aware of such methods of manipulation, I laugh to myself when my brother tries to guilt-trip me. It's truly pathetic. How awful of your mother, trying to get other members of the family to manipulate you. I'm glad that you recognize exactly what she's trying to achieve - and that you're immune to her BS. Just as I'm immune to my family's BS.
Well done god is for everyone and so never give up just pray from a distance as the devil is a liar!!
Crazy how we live rent free inside these narcissistic heads.
I have so appreciated your video's. I feel st 56 I'm learning to have real boundaries, healthy boundaries.
The silence has been wonderful and nice i don't have to deal with difficult situations anymore that was too much for me! No contact means to me happiness and peace no more gaslighting or any more mind games no more acting ! No contact means no more listening to someone talking about things that i don't want to hear or listen to! Or talking about other women besides me making me feel like nothing! No contact means no more love Bombing anymore! No more listening to someone talk about their own self Centered talk about themselves To other people who have no idea that that this person is not a good friend and is indifferent to you or anyone else who doesn't understand what or who this person really is! And that is a narcissist person !!