NARCISSISTS AND SECOND CHANCES

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  • Опубліковано 14 жов 2023
  • #narcissist #narcissismawareness Narcissists are really good at talking people into giving them second chances. How do you know when giving someone a second chance is the right thing to do and how do you know when it's a big mistake?
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КОМЕНТАРІ • 38

  • @ms.budgetmom8472
    @ms.budgetmom8472 7 місяців тому +30

    I return after one year and it was hell on earth. He was full of anger as he blamed me for everything. Take my advice. Once you leave don’t ever return

    • @tathe3786
      @tathe3786 7 місяців тому +7

      Exact the next time they trey to make you want to come back to them and then they try to put all the blame for all that happens on you!! So please never give a secound chance or want them back!!!

    • @angellollar1083
      @angellollar1083 6 місяців тому +2

      The only good thing that happened after giving second chance was a son and his 2 children; my grandchildren
      It has been extremely character building. 44 years in and financially I am resting in the Lord. Waiting.

    • @almcelroy4818
      @almcelroy4818 5 місяців тому

      Second chance?! Ha! Second nightmare!

  • @moonstone4684
    @moonstone4684 7 місяців тому +12

    And let's not forget that leaving and coming back multiple times from your trauma bond that you think is love, they don't view as a noble thing. They aren't grateful you gave them 2nd, 3rd, 4th, 5th etc chances. Instead they will call YOU the abuser, for leaving and coming back so many times. Telling you how many times you've hurt them, and how bad of a person you are for that. This is the madness I got caught in. Actually questioned myself as to why I wasn't strong enough to STAY away. Then shamed myself for leaving in the first place, as I was being convinced it was just a little misunderstanding and that I just took it wrong.
    If this is happening to you, LEAVE for the final time and never look back. They are master gaslighters and manipulators. You didn't take things wrong. Their behavior was terrible. And it's not normal to fight 24/7 with someone, having thousands of "misunderstandings". Most ESPECIALLY when you didn't do anything wrong except walk away when you knew you should.

  • @PeterShaw-ne1yq
    @PeterShaw-ne1yq 7 місяців тому +16

    A narc will always follow their script 🫤

  • @robertfredrick2937
    @robertfredrick2937 7 місяців тому +14

    Forgive...Yes. You dont even have to say it to their face.....Take them back ? No !!! Move on...Never Forget

  • @nopereradicator
    @nopereradicator 7 місяців тому +14

    It’s always amazed me that no matter how the relationship ended they always come back for a second chance. And there’s no length they won’t go to strong arm you back into a relationship. It’s creepy.

  • @wendyelliott6828
    @wendyelliott6828 7 місяців тому +7

    I got so caught up in what he needed, and I discounted the evidence I was living a fantasy in my own head. I wanted him to want the same thing I wanted.

  • @drlarrymitchell
    @drlarrymitchell 4 місяці тому +2

    It all ended when I came to the conclusion that she was living on second chances, and I was no longer willing to give her any more second chances.

  • @SheldonBrown567
    @SheldonBrown567 4 місяці тому +3

    My whole family, including my ex wife, are narcissists and flying monkeys. I had to go no contact 2 1/2 years ago. However, this stuff was generational. So I don’t blame any of them. Being the scapegoat, even though I forgive them, I have to love from afar, and have no contact ❤

  • @mynewlife1911
    @mynewlife1911 7 місяців тому +13

    I agree 💯
    I forgave plenty and forgiving the narc just kept the whole disgusting pattern the narc does going.
    I’m no contact w any narcs for the rest of my life.

  • @ironfist859
    @ironfist859 7 місяців тому +10

    Brilliant!! Great video for people who have never experienced a narcissist. Those people who say "why can't you just give them another chance". NO WAY!!!

  • @user-em3np4vr8c
    @user-em3np4vr8c 2 місяці тому +1

    Good to be reminded, i have blocked my nasty sister, no more chances ever, not unless she got down on knees and i could see change, and that just won't happen!❤

  • @darrenwhiteside1619
    @darrenwhiteside1619 2 місяці тому +1

    This lady is truly speaking from the heart and it's quite apparent that she wants to help as many people as possible who have been severely traumatized by people with this disorder. Thank you and please continue to share your thoughts and insights whenever you can.

  • @PeterShaw-ne1yq
    @PeterShaw-ne1yq 7 місяців тому +3

    ...consequences! Sure!
    For everybody else 🎉

  • @tathe3786
    @tathe3786 7 місяців тому +3

    I gave chance 2 after he Promised to change!
    He didn’t!
    But he made me hope cause he played the victim, that needs someone who s really holding on… so i asked him to talk it over!!
    Again He lured me in said ok let’s try….. but what he didn’t charge.
    Now he wants me to live it open cause he needs to have it open, after all this years of him suffering in his marriage, with this cold spouse and mother of his sons. Me asking for a talk over made him try to move goalpost… and that what they do… they lovebomb, then push and pull you in the bond… they let you back, try to move your goalposts, if that failed, turn all blame on you!!!
    And bammmmm they are the good guy… ready to start next!!!!
    That’s how they work! So never let them come back!!!!

  • @user-em3np4vr8c
    @user-em3np4vr8c 7 місяців тому +1

    The sister who I didn't speak to for 6 months rang me yesterday, it was feeling like she was putting me down in subtle ways; I think I am going to stop answering phone again, she hasn't said sorry, I can see this is going right back to where it left off and I just did not want to talk to her, , its, I don't like her and I don't like the way she makes me feel and I won't go on social media anymore, I don"t trust her friend or my nieces, although I have no grudge towards them, why am I putting up with these family members who make me feel miserable, I may as well nip it in the bud and save myself the grief! Hope I can follow 🙏 😌 through! Thankyou for your insights!❤❤❤

  • @ianarn
    @ianarn 7 місяців тому +1

    Mine makes herself out to be the wonderful empath! After discarding me from a 10 month unstable ‘relationship’ but not before telling me how much she loves me. I’ve been ignored and stone walled for 8 months at my social dance events. Still she drags men in front of me to dance provocatively with and has to look at me to gauge my discomfort. Quite the most vindictive woman I’ve ever met. I wonder when it will end and she’ll just get bored of her devaluing and move onto properly abusing the next man?

  • @wendyelliott6828
    @wendyelliott6828 7 місяців тому +2

    You help me examine myself and how the narcissist changed me. I have been working on examining my beliefs. It has been 4 years and I want to change myself.

  • @quinoasongs2507
    @quinoasongs2507 7 місяців тому +2

    Yep, what you said at the end was exactly how I ended it. I said "we're in last-chance mode". And I had an "if-then" list. There were a few subtle bendings and I'd remind him "that's on the list", or ask what he means by this. When it came, it was when I was on my way home from my regular bi-weekly routine. When I got home, I acted distant, and it came again, and I said, as I'd been practicing "_____ I warned you".

  • @lauracornell4629
    @lauracornell4629 6 місяців тому +1

    You got through to me with solid advice. Yoi have obviously lived the torment.

  • @angellollar1083
    @angellollar1083 6 місяців тому +1

    Your channel is a life saver. Encouraging. God bless you!!!

  • @sherimascote7495
    @sherimascote7495 7 місяців тому +2

    Totally agree 💯 true

  • @CurlyQxyz
    @CurlyQxyz 7 місяців тому +2

    I love your videos. Always spot on. Also I love your Halloween shirt. Your tops are always very cute. 😊

  • @debbielighthall9671
    @debbielighthall9671 2 місяці тому +1

    I gave him chance after chance until I finally left him
    He started therapy 2 days after I left
    He asked to keep communication open
    Then over the holidays we spent time together, out of the blue, he turned on me like a viper, and he totally discarded me

  • @roxymovie3938
    @roxymovie3938 7 місяців тому

    This was a good dive into forgiveness - in general, not only Narcs, because they don't deserve any second chance.
    Thank you ❤

  • @dhmill761
    @dhmill761 7 місяців тому +4

    You have helped me so much. Thank you.

  • @hayswhite
    @hayswhite 7 місяців тому +4

    Great timing for this video! I needed to hear this ❤

  • @ajaykumarsingh1105
    @ajaykumarsingh1105 7 місяців тому +2

    Hi, I have seen so many videos about narcissism and yours is one of the best explanations I have heard and Dr Ramani also. You deserve so many more subscribers. I couldn't help myself about it, I am probably wrong but one advice... maybe you can change the name of your UA-cam channel. Maybe it's hard to search when anyone searches about narcissism. Just an advice. Take care. ❤

  • @user-em3np4vr8c
    @user-em3np4vr8c 3 місяці тому

    Great advice!!!❤❤

  • @ligyasouza755
    @ligyasouza755 2 місяці тому

    Forgiveness does not mean taking back
    forgiveness is good for you and helps you to move on but it does not imply to get them in your life again. forgave someone completely and feel free but we are not together