Missing 411 creeped me out until I looked more into it and found out that the parents in the main story who kept insisting their kid just magically went missing were arrested on suspicion of killing their kid. And it wasn’t just for nothing, there was a bunch of evidence that came up and it just made me doubt the entire thing. By being into paranormal stuff for so long, you start to realize people either leave out bits of evidence in a story to make it seem more spooky and just massage the story to make it all seem more mysterious and unexplained.
Not doubting you but kids literally vanish quite fast, they are curious and quite fast too, when I was 12 was watching my cousin I was just gone to get a cup of water and the kid was on top of the wardrobe and he was 4, I still don't understand how he did that but I was lucky that my father was sleeping in the sofa. But yes is quite maddening when you start looking into a strange cases and you notice they ignore certain clues or even connect stuff that has nothing to do with it just to make it more creepy, I just feel bad for the families they just wanting to get some closure and people calling them to tell their theories about bigfoot.
It’s very frustrating that shit like that where the answer is pretty damn clear is clumped in with like- genuinely strange disappearances and deaths that are interesting to research and could benefit from theories and speculation Missing cases are always good to be in the public eye, but some of them have very clear answers if you take 5 seconds to look at all the evidence and just go off on a wild goose chase while ignore the clearest answer
Idk. While some parents (some is the big word) are fully at fault I have experienced some weird things out in the wilderness. I just can't be so stubborn as to dismiss the wonders and weirdness of nature. I try to be smart and realize strange things happen. It also spits in the face of Native tribes to dismiss everything we believe in. Some phenomena has been discovered (giant squid and other bizarre creatures) and some haven't.
The dude who wrote the books and made the movies is a “Bigfoot is real” writer. It seems like he came up with this because Bigfoot isn’t a money maker anymore. A few skeptic sites have done data analysis and there’s nothing unusual.
Dear Zachary is probably the only true crime documentary I've seen that shows respect for the victim and centers their story as opposed to sensationalizing a bunch of stuff about the killer.
Honorable mentions: Mondo Cane Don't F**k With Cats: Hunting an Internet Killer Cropsey Tickled Mommy Dead and Dearest Missing 411: The Hunted 12:54 Watch out category: Orozco the Embalmer Traces of Death 10. 15:10 Just Melvin: Just Evil 9. 16:32 Night and Fog 8. 18:35 Jesus Camp 7. 20:36 Hated 6. 22:50 The Bridge 5. 24:58 Dear Zachary 4. 27:09 Africa Addio 3. 29:32 Abducted in Plain Sight 2. 31:24 Something Wrong with Aunt Diane 1. 33:28 Titticut Follies
I wanna mention a thing about the topic covered in The Bridge that you didn’t mention: a survivor spoken to in the documentary, Kevin Hines, as well as many survivors generally, state that they immediately regretted their decision after the point of no return. Obviously whether the percentage of survivors who regretted their attempt is kinda high is due to people generally regretting after the attempt or due to the survivors’ desire to live is something we have no way of knowing, but I think that information is important for those thinking about or afraid of having that impulse to keep in mind.
Same here. The fact that it wasn’t the pain of surviving with such horrific injuries that made them regret attempting. They regretted it as soon as they stepped off the ledge. Every single one of them.
I suspect there is a degree of natural instinctual fear that would make you regret it.That is not to say that there isn't a clarity that comes with actually jumping and of course the aftermath and injuries etc.
Yep because when it comes down to it you’re meant to survive. Sylvia Plath wrote about it in The Bell Jar, how she tried to die by drowning but it didn’t work. Her body was fighting to live. I’ve never understood people who attempt suicide by jumping. Why suffer more? Just get a gun and make it quick.
@@stefuhneexo I second the other reply, but also my experience was I was really struggling with undiagnosed ADHD, and I fell into a mental hole where I’d get a very intense, specific impulse to throw myself out of a high window. Sometimes the brain has Rules about stuff like that.
@@stefuhneexo “Man, these mentally distraught people seeking to end their own lives are acting in a way that I can’t understand.” Y’know, that IS typically the problem.
Have to recommend God Knows Where I Am (2016) to the list. "The body of a homeless woman is found in an abandoned farmhouse, and a diary documenting a journey of starvation and the loss of sanity lies next to the body. For nearly four months, Linda Bishop, a prisoner of her own mind, survived on apples and rain water during one of the coldest winters on record." I sat in silence for a long while after watching it.
I was in a class in Middle School for kids with learning issues. When we went to the Holocaust Musium I DIDNT KNOW WHAT THE HOLOCAUST WAS. We learned half of the material the rest of the kids did. My mom (who was chaperoning) gave me a talking to about not laughing if I got uncomfortable and I was all “uh OK?” Then we went through the Musium and HAD TO GO TO DINNER AFTERWARD. I didn’t want food. I wanted to go back to the hotel and hide under the covers. I didn’t tell anyone that was when I learned about the Holocaust until about a month ago. It would be really easy to trick people with learning issues (like myself) that the Holocaust was somehow different than it was or not real because we never got to that part in school. I was just privileged enough to have parents who wanted me to go on the Washington DC trip to learn. So educate yourself. Watch some documentaries and activate your brains!
I’m sorry you had to find out that way :( ofc it’s great you didn’t get taught misinformation, but it must’ve been scary as hell to find out by seeing all the exhibits with graphic photographs and such
@@jessargo yes. I feel bad for that kid I used to be. I wish my educators could have at least glossed over the hard stuff. It is true. I’m very fortunate to have good parents. They cared to inform me correctly, they just didn’t know that the Holocaust had been skipped in history class. Edit: This was 2006, so the people I went to school with, are all adults now.
@@gracewinchester-baggins4205 I had a similar learning experience. we went to a park after seeing those types of exhibits in our local holocaust museum. other kids played football while I struggled to get food down. then we saw the dog park and my teacher had to explain to me that I was playing with one of the puppies too roughly. I felt so bad oml
And this is why I will forever be grateful that one of my favorite teachers read us Number the Stars and really talked to us about the Holocaust. Yes, we were young, but something about being explained those horrors in a soft voice made the blow less severe. Like did I have nightmares and understand how horrific it was? Yes. But I've also heard about other people learning about the Holocaust in much worse ways, including in this comment section.
@@W41K.3R I’m sorry it affected you like that. Needless to say, we shouldn’t have had to learn like that. (And I’m sure that those puppies were okay. Still glad your teacher made you aware of yourself) Ps. The fact that you felt bad for being rough with pups means that you have genuine empathy and were likely traumatized by the Museum. I’m speaking as someone who went through something similar.
"I don't know why her mother named her after a slur..." Probably in tribute of the legendary stripper Gypsy Rose Lee aka Rose Louise Hovick (1911-1970 ). All things considered, that name was maybe one of the *less* abusive things Mother Blanchard inflichted on her defenseless child...
Also was not always considered a slur in the public eye, considering most people back then (and even now) weren’t using it negatively and just didn’t know of the term’s origins. Some words can be viewed as harmless one day and extremely offensive the next, and vice versa. Nowhere near as bad as H.P. Lovecraft naming his cat something that he knew damn well was not a term of endearment and in fact was a slur he did not shy away from using for the purpose of hateful speech… but we don’t really talk about that…
@@therealCrazyJakeWhile Lovecraft didn't name that cat, I believe it was named by his grandfather or someone else, he did continue that legacy by naming a cat the same thing in Rats in the Walls.
The most fucked up part of Don't Fuck With Cats was that the internet sleuths caught the wrong guy and drove him to suicide and the whole thing was just completely glossed over because they eventually knew who the real guy was.
The bridge actually triggered me into taking my recovery seriously. Something about knowing that you might fail actually fucked me up so much that I had to stop actively trying to end things.
The Bridge is a fantastic documentary despite of the controversy it took. For me it was the most unsetting documentary I have ever watched. '77 minutes' was the second one
*Honorable Mentions:* - 3:31 Mondo Cane - 4:50 Don't Fuck with Cats - 6:34 Cropsy - 7:25 Tickled - 8:40 Mommy Dead and Dearest - 9:52 Missing 411 - 11:30 The Hunted *Watch out! category* (too saucy for the list, too saucy for the mentions) (12:54) - 13:02 Orozco the embalmer - 13:37 Traces of dead (kinda like faces of death, but not quite) *The List* 10: Just Melvin, Just Evil (15:11) 9: Night and Fog (16:34) 8: Jesus Camp (18:35) 7: Hated: GG Allin and the Murder Junkies (20:42) 6: The brigde (22:53) (TW: suicide) 5: Dear Zachary (25:00) 4: Africa Addio (27:09) (TW: racism) -4a: Goodbye Uncle Tom (28:48) (kinda not documentary) -4b: Cannibal Holocaust (29:04) (I'm not sure if it is a doc or not???) 3: Abducted in plain sight (29:25) 2: Something is wrong with aunt Diane (31:24) 1: Titicut Follies (33:52) -1a: Paris is Burning (37:16) -1b: Life itself (I think? She just mentions "the Roger Ebert" one)
In Orozco the Embalmer, he doesn't get embalmed at the end. The film is partially about the aftermath of La Violencia and how Orozco cares for the nameless dead found in the streets of his village and gives them dignity by repairing their bodies. In the end he passes away and becomes another neglected corpse, with nobody around to embalm him. It's a sad cyclical story about human suffering, empathy, and neglect. EXTREMELY graphic medical footage, but a very powerful and touching piece. Def belongs in the 'Watch Out' category haha
As a Jew, I agree that Night and Fog is something that everyone should watch, to get a full emotional understanding of just how atrocious the Shoah was. There's lots of media out there that sanitize the brutality and almost romanticize the period, and unfortunately holocaust education is being cut from a lot of mandatory curriculum for kids
yeah what they are doing with historical education about the brutality of white people is actually terrifying. legit big brother erasing history so we can repeat it.
@@theoneandonlymichaelmccormick I can't see your comments bc UA-cam is deleting them very soon after posting, but why would you ever feel the need to bring up epstein on a post that has nothing to do with him, elie wiesel, or anyone he's been connected to?
Southwest of Salem: The story of the San Antonio Four I would give an honorable mention. Basically, 4 lesbian Latina women in the 90’s in San Antonio got falsely accused of molesting two girls who were the niece of one of the accused and because of Homophobia and the “Satanic Ritual Abuse” Panic of the 80’s and 90’s, they were found guilty based on the word of the kids, who turns out where told by their uncle to lie about being molested, because one of the women rejected his advances. I wanna say the last woman got out of jail in 2016. It’s disturbing in the sense of documenting how the criminal system has historically failed LGBTQ+ people, and how easy it is for people to buy into fearmongering and moral panics that have a human cost. Kinda relevant today with Groomer libel being thrown at LGBTQ+ people for just existing around children.
I was forced to go to evangelical camps every summer as a teen and it was a horrific experience. I was already struggling with gender dysphoria so their indoctrination didn't really stick but watching hundreds of other kids being emotionally manipulated every single year was really rough and has left a lasting impact on me
Just Melvin just Evil is really hard to watch, but it does do a good job of showing generational trauma, and complex grief. The funeral scene is a perfect example of it. The people he traumatized (his daughters and sons) are genuinely upset when he dies, yet happy and celebrating in their grief at the same time. It's a wild ride from start to finish.
I'm a 40-year-old woman yet I dressed up like GG allin for Halloween one year when I was 22 and I put brown Maybelline foundation on my arms and face to simulate feces and won a Halloween costume contest at a dive bar in Jacksonville Florida. It was one of the best things that's ever happened in my life.
The way Abducted In Plain Sight unfolds is so wild. By the time they got to the reveal with the dad I felt like I was losing my mind. It was truly breathtaking how passive and naive the entire family seemed through the whole thing. One of those stories that would seem totally unbelievable if it were fiction.
The Act of Killing to me is like the film equivalent of staring into the void. You can't really find a more "evil" subject for a documentary than Anwar, who both directly and indirectly murdered thousands of people. The film then gives you the difficult task of trying to understand the fact that this person is a human being capable of remorse and guilt for his actions. It's one of the most unique and powerful documentaries you will ever see, but you'll probably only want to watch it once.
I was thinking exactly about this. I cannot think of any other piece of media that has left me feeling so empty and disturbed as this one. It is disturbing at an existential level.
remembering how me (at maybe 12 or 13), my mom, and my sister sat down and watched dear zachary not knowing AT ALL what we were getting into. i cannot believe we just casually watched a documentary so many people consider to be one of the most disturbing. i dont remember a lot of it tho
@Kingofgaymes we literally didn't watch any trailers and thought it was genuinely a sweet doc about a kids dad. The description did not imply the type of doc it would be.
Dear Zachary kinda reinforced my distrust of people, I know that was not the intention of the guy who made it, but I have met so many dodgy and weird people in my life and it really makes it seem like I'm better off living on a homestead by myself. My therapist is going to make an absolute killing.
If documentaries about statewide power over marginalized people are what get to you, then Time: The Kalief Browder Story is definitely a suggestion. It follows a 16 year old black teenager in New York who gets sent Jail over a crime he didn't commit, and because he refused to admit to the crime, he was held in prison while his trial kept getting delayed over the course of three years, two of which were spent in solitary confinement. Not only did Kalief comity suicide by hanging two years after being released, his mother died of a heart attack a year later while in the process of trying to sue the state of New York. The whole thing was so distressing that I was only able to watch this over the course of months, and it's even worse because virtually nothing has changed since then.
hard agree on Jesus Camp. i had a friend, who’s an atheist now, but when she was a teenager when she would come back from an evangelical summer bible camp and was like really into what they said for a few weeks after, fortunately it never stuck by the time school started, but it was really weird to deal with every summer for like 5 years (also noticed that the description box has the info from the disturbing movie top 10)
Jesus high's are kinda real. I used to go to a bible camp every now and again in the fall and even though I'm not really religious I think that some bible camps are just fun/relaxing. Definitely worth doing when you're growing up.
@@UhhNon i went to a day camp bc my mom used it as cheap babysitting in the summer it wasn’t run by evangelicals so it wasn’t really intense like the overnight camp she went to and also we didn’t actually go to church so whatever they said never really stuck anyway, but being surrounded by what the energy and rhetoric in the evangelical ones for 24/7 for a couple weeks is def going to mess with your head, it’s just how cult shit works, get a crowd worked up into a singular focus and the human group think thing kicks in and it can happen to anyone of any age
Jesus Camp is a hard watch, even now without the context of the time it was filmed during the Bush administration, the Iraq War, and before the Ted Haggard scandals. It's so disheartening, too. Yeah, there's batshit chaos moments like kids smashing mugs that represent the government, the red tape segment, and that weird as fuck George Bush cutout. But, I think the one scene that will just forever live in my mind is that one kid, probably no older than 10 or 12, who confessed in front of the entire camp and congregation that he was questioning his faith. You can just hear the guilt in his voice and see the judgement on their faces. It's fuckin' depressing. I will say that I'd be lying if I wouldn't be interested in seeing where they all are now. I was the same age as Levi and them when it came out, so checking out if they separated themselves from the ideology or not would be something for sure.
I got sent to vacation bible school once. The only thing I got out of it was I could hang out in the little arcade and play games and drink milkshakes.
What you said about marginalized groups still being under attack and people not wanting to think about that fact is too true. I am so sorry that you were forced to move because of the absolute garbage state of this country/the world. I hope you are able to settle in comfortably where you are now.
So I live in the area of Bridgewater State Hospital that Titicut Follies was filmed at and really, it hasn't improved much. This year, they were in trouble because they were using chemical restraints on the people there. It is absolutely insane that after all this time, they still treat the people there like absolute trash.
10:45 As a caver, I seriously believe a lot of the missing persons cases in missing 411 are to do with caves and cave systems. If you look at a cluster map of missing persons and compare it to a map of cave entrances/systems in North America, a lot of the maps overlap very clearly
There's Something Wrong with Aunt Diane fucked me up. The tragedy, the mystery, the damn phone call of those kids last moments AND those images from the scene of the accident. Horrific. And then the family having to grapple with the notion that maybe they didn't know their loved one as much as they thought they did. Gut wrenching stuff.
Possibly the most important question in punk history: did the people who paid money to watch GG Allin take a shit on stage get their money's worth or not? I mean on the one hand, obviously no, but on the other hand, imagine being able to tell people for the rest of your life that you were there.
thanks may, you're honestly doing amazing work, i really appreciate the effort to make sure that if people are going to watch horrible nightmare stuff then at least it's going to be good horrible nightmare stuff. You mentioned wanting to make folks happy right at the end there, so i have an idea- have you considered making a list of perhaps like the weirdest comfort movies? like films that are weird or disturbing or very avant-garde that have something uplifting about them anyway? idk just an idea im watching this while i have a headache i love your work and i really need to get around to buying your book
I really liked The Emperor's Naked Army Marches On (Yuki Yukite Shingun). It's a Film about a Japanese WWII ex-soldier who confronts his former comrades and officers about the atrocities and crimes they committed in New Guinea (including cannibalizing of the civilian population and low-ranking privates). It's absolutely wild and the guy (Kenzō Okuzaki), an anarchist who was in prison for assaulting the Emperor is equally insane and awesome.
The Act of Killing is disturbing in an In Cold Blood kind of way. Where you're actually getting to talk to people who committed a massacre some of them are very sympathetic
in a strange way, that movie was like an unflinching challenge towards the idea of restorative justice. it showed the many moving parts that compels regular human beings to commit terrible atrocities, dares to show the most tender and occasionally reflective moments of the killers, and then will cut to a scene of soldiers lazing around and vocally reminiscing about all the teenagers they gleefully raped.
There's a companion piece to that movie- "The look of silence" Making the Act of Killing was a way of distracting the killers for long enough to get the guy interviewing them in "The look of silence" spirited away to safety out of the country
A friend of mine in college actually worked with the family who’s kids Diane killed in the car crash. They still believed she was innocent and just accidentally crashed even though a whole house of drugs were found in her system.
@@leahrebecca2051 Possibly. The impression I got from talking to my friend, was that the family of the kids Diane killed are still deeply in denial about what actually happened and are still convinced to this day that Diane never had substance abuse issues and was it was all just a tragic random accident. I think it’s more likely that Diane was good at hiding her demons and addictions from others until it was too late.
Dear Zachary is soooo sad. I worked at a video rental place and picked it up just off the cover art. That shit made me seriously cry. Crazy they gave all this footage
just wanted to let you know that i read fluids over the past 24h and absolutely loveddd it. i’m a blossoming tr&nny living like 4h from moore,ok so it really literally hit home. thank you for being so vulnerable and sharing your art !! if not for yourself keep up the good work for me, your new biggest fan ❤️
Great list! I would recommend to you (not pointing out what you missed, just trading a list for a list): Sick: The Life & Death of Bob Flanagan (1997) Paragraph 175 (2000) Chicken Hawk: Men Who Love Boys (1994) The Video Diary of Ricardo Lopez (2000) Stevie (2002) Capturing The Friedmans (2003) Hearts & Minds (1974) Tarnation (2003) Gray Matter (2004) Mr. Death: The Rise & Fall of Fred A. Leuchter, Jr. (1999) Some are obvious, some are extremely hard to watch. There is a documentary about Jacopetti and Prosperi called Godfathers of Mondo (2003). I haven't seen it in a while, but I remember it giving some interesting insight into what the heck was going through their heads when they were making such outrageous films.
Technically, Gypsy Rose was named after famed stripper Gypsy Rose Lee. As far as messed up documentaries, there's one called The Business of Being Born. I believe it has a sequel now too. It's essentially an attempt to scare parents-to-be out of trusting doctors when it comes to pregnancy and childbirth. And you get to see Ricki Lake naked while giving birth, so that made me uncomfortable.
The whole Missing 411 conspiracy is deeply rooted in racism and classism if you ask me. The woods, and nature in general, is a lot less merciful than most people think, getting disoriented and therefore getting lost is not rare (even for experienced hikers/outdoor enthusiasts), and things like hypothermia and exposure are dangerous. But it's easier for people to blame it on some mysterious "savages" (rooted in racist anti-Native American history, which depicts Natives as barbaric, violent and primitive), or "uncivilized" madmen (rooted in the classist, harmful stereotypes about Appalachian people, which depicts them as "inbred hillbillies" or "aggressive mountain men").
I don’t think I’ve ever heard people blame it on “savages” or something. It’s usually like… Bigfoot or aliens or a government conspiracy or some other inherent crazy supernatural force from another dimension that just happens in the woods. It’s all nonsense obviously but I think calling it racist and classist is a little ridiculous.
i was just binging your disturbing movies videos and i was wondering "man how cool would it be if may made a video about disturbing documentaries specifically" and now i see this in my feed. QUEEN SHIT. love you may, hope you're doing well!
Ill never forget my first highschool holocaust unit. My teacher was super cool and he was great at what he did, usually he was pretty funny and jovial but we came in one day (after a few days of him telling us how bad it was going to be) and he was totally stone faced. We sat down and he just straight up showed us footage of people starved to death being thrown into pits for an hour, just real actual footage from back then. It was fucking horrible. It was really really bad but it was necessary. After years and years of people going "hitler was bad i guess, holocaust was bad I guess" in a very vague very nonspecific way he showed us exactly why it was atrocious, explained to us exactly why war is the worst thing people can do to each other, and how WWII came to be.
the documentary about the aunt driving the wrong way down the highway was TOTALLY wild. so so bizarre and i think about it often bcs of how perplexing the case is!!
when i first really squirmed out from under my family's evangelical thumb i watched jesus camp more than once as a reminder of what i was getting away from and get a weird sense of comfort from the fact that yes, this shit was actually being discussed and publicized to a degree and maybe someday something could be done about it agree that tickled is definitely fucking WILD and incredibly fascinating but tbh it didn't leave me quite as shaken as the others
I'm from Staten Island and I asked all the Staten Islanders adults in my life if they had heard of Cropsey growing up and they all said no lol. Must be a very Greenbelt-area rumor, but the documentary was very "ALL Staten Islanders know this legend, oooOOooOOo" Anyway great list :) thanks May
related to the missing 411 bit, cases where children just vanish scare me. like marjorie west in 1938; she was picnicking with her family, her older sister walked a few feet to give their mother some flowers she picked, and when they turned around marjorie was gone. she most likely just wandered off and died of exposure, but the fact no sign of her has been found since when she was *right there* is so chilling
At this point, I feel like "Missing 411" has become my sleeper cell agent phrase. Absolutely HATE everything to do with Missing 411 and everyone who touts it. For context: I live next to a national park. My family used to live inside said national park. If you go to the museums around the national park, there are even pictures of my family that are there in a historical context and my family can pick them out for you. I assure you, nothing weird is going on in national parks. The simple reality is often that tourists don't know how to behave themselves or read the very clear warning signs (I am looking at you! All of the people who want to feed the wildlife or get too close to them! You would be surprised by how many rich, white tourists just don't realize that the woods are not their personal playground to go act like fairytale princesses in!), and they often get hurt in very, very preventable ways. Reminds me a lot of my volunteering at our local zoo, actually: quite a lot of the fences and the barriers are specifically to stop visitors from getting too close and putting themselves in dangerous situations. Just obscenely frustrating for me.
I remember when I was in high school, we were in a production of the Diary of Anne Frank, and to give us more context our directors took us to the Holocaust museum in Dallas and had us watch 2 full hours of interviews with Holocaust survivors, and that viewing experience has never left me
'Abducted in Plain Sight' is wild. I would also recommend 'Hole in the Head' about people who drill holes in their own skulls due to a belief that it makes them happier.
I've lost count how many times I've seen Dear Zachary. I like watching the beginning where everyone talks about how much they love Andrew and wouldn't you know it I'm watching the whole thing again
It's been a long time coming for this and I'm absolutely delighted by the list. Edit: Oh, since you mentioned Joe Francis (who did Girls Gone Wild), he's behind the Banned in America / Banned from Television series - not Traces of Death. Edit 2: If anyone is looking for another documentary to check out, Capturing the Friedmans might be of interest and can be a companion piece to Just Melvin, Just Evil. It centers on the Friedman family, a seemingly average family from a suburban community in New York, who were thrown into the spotlight after the father and one of his sons were accused of sexually abusing the young students of a computer class they ran out of the house. A significant portion of it is told through home video footage, especially in the aftermath of the news coming in, and is just... a lot.
Abducted in Plain sight was the craziest most Mormon shit I’ve ever seen and I live in Utah. Dear Zachary is the saddest damn story. Aunt Diane also sad but so weird and confusing and unresolved that it becomes the dominant emotion.
I watched Dear Zachary in high school and it traumatized me so bad. It was the first time I had really been confronted with how horrible and unfair the world is. I couldn't even finish it and to this day I have never tried watching it again. It's an amazing film though
Earthlings! I was actually low-key surprised it wasn't on the disturbing movies iceberg on tier 6. I found it way more disturbing than the likes of Faces of Death and Black Metal Veins which were on that tier.
@@Frijolero18 Yeah, I went vegan overnight after seeing it. I only started eating animal products again because I got extremely thin and my doctor basically told me I had to. tbf I don't live in the US.
@@ambertheanxious One of the most devastating things I have ever seen and I don't blame you for not finishing it. It made me cry which movies/documentaries very rarely do. It upset me more than the likes of MDPOPE.
@@ambertheanxious Oh and congrats on 6 years, that's amazing. I did it mostly for the animals but the health benefits were ASTONISHING. My hair and skin were glowing and it was the only time in my life I really had ENERGY.
Dear Zachary tore my insides out and I cried so hard, it scared me. I never felt that kind of grief. I hope I’ll never come close to that again. The documentary was so well done. The family and friends are so sincerely wonderful and loved him so much and he deserved it. How his close friend was able to make the documentary is a testament to the love he had for his friend. That is what makes the story so soul crushing.
Or the rest of the works of Gary Paulsen. Or even stuff by Jack London. Nature can kill you and destroy your body in an infinite number of fun and creative ways but people don't wanna admit that. It's easier for some to come up with an insane conspiracy theory than it is to admit that they're a small part of a vast and unforgiving world.
I remember watching tickled and just getting fuckef up in the head to realize the extent of rich people's power and how many situations that are even worse we are not even aware of. Also, I know this is a random comment, i hope it doesnt make you feel uncomfortable but you look great in this video! Loved the red glasses!
Paradise Lost personally fucked me up a bit. To clarify: not the court trial or the story that we’re following. Specifically the fact that they show footage and photos of the dead kids and just straight up pics of the mutilated genitalia. It just felt unnecessary and exploitative and I wish I hadn’t seen it. I wanted to know about the West Memphis Three and think about how fucked that whole case is, but the very explicit footage of the kids was really upsetting and felt like, idk, a further invasion of privacy and just disrespectful to these victims. You know?
Dear Zachary DESTROYED ME, I would not recommend it to anyone who’s having a really bad time. If you think you can handle it, it’s beautifully made and genuinely the most heart wrenching thing I’ve ever seen.
So, I saw Jesus Camp back in high-school. Our religious studies teacher showed it to us. Honestly it was some of the most disturbing shit I've ever seen and sparked my still prevalent belief that there's really not much difference between an organised religion and a cult.
I was told to never think about the future or interact with society because my personal zombie buddy was going to come destroy my enemies any moment now.
@@HeatherHolt Well, no kidding. My specific question was the intended message meaning to be gained from the viewing experience. Like, if I was a religious studies teacher I’d need a pretty specific mission statement if I’m gonna show kids something that’s liable to put them off religion.
you have such a fun energy while talking about such despicable things.. i almost forgot what i was watching because i was just so enchanted by how silly you are and how many little dark jokes you sprinkle in that made me giggle. good vids. good vids.
I remember watching Just Melvin on UA-cam when I was probably like 13-14 and I must’ve literally just looked up “p*dophile” or “child m*lestation” or something. I completely blocked out that memory until you mentioned it in one of your other videos and suddenly it hit me like a truck. I distinctly remember looking it up because I wanted to hear those graphic accounts of exactly what happened to the survivors because I was going through the same thing at the time and it was like… almost pornographic for me as a kid bc my little messed up baby brain was like “oh yeah! That’s what’s hot, that’s what sex is. A bunch of men do that stuff to me and I know that makes them like me, so it’s sexy obviously.” Not good times. Not fun. Would not recommend.
@alexlloyd5348 oh yeah dw I am now lol. Turns out completely average men seem a lot less appealing when you’re not a dumb sheltered kid and actually have a developed brain.
i had to turn off jesus camp 20 minutes in because it reminded me of my religiously traumatic childhood growing up christian! so when this was on ur list i was like ! yay! someone looks at this and doesnt think of it as a normal or okay documentary because i lived through that and it is in fact deeply traumatic!
I remember being amused by Jesus Camp when it first came out, then re-watching it post-Trump and realizing the kids in it where now in their 20s and therefore old enough to vote…. It kind of ruined my week…
We watched Night and Fog for a Holocaust course during my second year of university and I especially remember the scenes with bulldozers being burned into my brain. I'm glad I saw such a powerful documentary but damn do those images still haunt me.
Cropsey and Titicut Follies are both pretty similar. While Cropsey is about specifically a urban legend, what I took away from it was that mental healthcare SUUUCKED
The Rewind documentary was awful I wasn’t expecting what it ended up being (horrific child abuse and incest) and was thrown off guard. Really heartbreaking stuff.
Re: "Why is she named after a slur?", she is named for famous burlesque performer, Gypsy Rose Lee. So, yes, still a slur, but the name is from enough decades ago that white ppl didn't think it was a slur.
I’m always happy for a new video from May about disturbing things, though you do talk about disturbing things you do it in a way that’s… so pleasant to hear. Strangely.
Abducted in plain sight had me screaming at my tv. The parents are the literal worst parents on the planet earth. Like how can you be convinced to let a stranger sleep in your kids bed.
Amen about dear Zachary. It is one of the better made documentaries I’ve ever seen. But by the end of it, I was snot dribbling ugly crying. I have always told people that it’s worth watching, but I will never watch it again.
The Bridge used to be available to watch on youtube back in 2011ish because I watched it when I was peak psychosis and ready to hang myself, but instead watched other people make the choice and somehow it was cathartic and kept me going... also hearing from the guy that jumped and changed his mind and turned his body around before impact and broke his legs, got me thinking about if I messed up my suicide attempt and it backed me up enough to get help. Very tragic documentary, the final suicide of the man it follows through a lot of it still lives in my mind.
May!! thank you for existing... I absolutely loved Tickled... if you want a rec, Sick: The Life and Death of Bob Flanagan, Supermasochist will never leave my brain
I generally prefer content with more visual background than creator narrative, but I found your overview and delivery of each clip really interesting and enjoyable. Great job 👌
my uncle works in a library and they were throwing out multiple vhs copies of titicut follies from the 80s! i have some of them now and i had no idea they were rare-ish
May! It's good to see you, I was wondering how you are. I probably missed some of your videos in the chaos that I call a life. Love the Ouija pillow, btw.
If Jesus actually had to watch Jesus Camp he’d start flipping tables again.
Now thats an iconic comment right there.
Missing 411 creeped me out until I looked more into it and found out that the parents in the main story who kept insisting their kid just magically went missing were arrested on suspicion of killing their kid. And it wasn’t just for nothing, there was a bunch of evidence that came up and it just made me doubt the entire thing. By being into paranormal stuff for so long, you start to realize people either leave out bits of evidence in a story to make it seem more spooky and just massage the story to make it all seem more mysterious and unexplained.
Not doubting you but kids literally vanish quite fast, they are curious and quite fast too, when I was 12 was watching my cousin I was just gone to get a cup of water and the kid was on top of the wardrobe and he was 4, I still don't understand how he did that but I was lucky that my father was sleeping in the sofa.
But yes is quite maddening when you start looking into a strange cases and you notice they ignore certain clues or even connect stuff that has nothing to do with it just to make it more creepy, I just feel bad for the families they just wanting to get some closure and people calling them to tell their theories about bigfoot.
It’s very frustrating that shit like that where the answer is pretty damn clear is clumped in with like- genuinely strange disappearances and deaths that are interesting to research and could benefit from theories and speculation
Missing cases are always good to be in the public eye, but some of them have very clear answers if you take 5 seconds to look at all the evidence and just go off on a wild goose chase while ignore the clearest answer
Idk. While some parents (some is the big word) are fully at fault I have experienced some weird things out in the wilderness. I just can't be so stubborn as to dismiss the wonders and weirdness of nature. I try to be smart and realize strange things happen. It also spits in the face of Native tribes to dismiss everything we believe in. Some phenomena has been discovered (giant squid and other bizarre creatures) and some haven't.
The dude who wrote the books and made the movies is a “Bigfoot is real” writer. It seems like he came up with this because Bigfoot isn’t a money maker anymore. A few skeptic sites have done data analysis and there’s nothing unusual.
wow so disturbing
Dear Zachary is probably the only true crime documentary I've seen that shows respect for the victim and centers their story as opposed to sensationalizing a bunch of stuff about the killer.
That documentary made me realize I am not someone who should be watching any true crime shows or docs ever.
Honorable mentions:
Mondo Cane
Don't F**k With Cats: Hunting an Internet Killer
Cropsey
Tickled
Mommy Dead and Dearest
Missing 411: The Hunted
12:54 Watch out category:
Orozco the Embalmer
Traces of Death
10. 15:10 Just Melvin: Just Evil
9. 16:32 Night and Fog
8. 18:35 Jesus Camp
7. 20:36 Hated
6. 22:50 The Bridge
5. 24:58 Dear Zachary
4. 27:09 Africa Addio
3. 29:32 Abducted in Plain Sight
2. 31:24 Something Wrong with Aunt Diane
1. 33:28 Titticut Follies
Pin this comment, dagnabbit!
I wanna mention a thing about the topic covered in The Bridge that you didn’t mention: a survivor spoken to in the documentary, Kevin Hines, as well as many survivors generally, state that they immediately regretted their decision after the point of no return. Obviously whether the percentage of survivors who regretted their attempt is kinda high is due to people generally regretting after the attempt or due to the survivors’ desire to live is something we have no way of knowing, but I think that information is important for those thinking about or afraid of having that impulse to keep in mind.
Same here. The fact that it wasn’t the pain of surviving with such horrific injuries that made them regret attempting. They regretted it as soon as they stepped off the ledge. Every single one of them.
I suspect there is a degree of natural instinctual fear that would make you regret it.That is not to say that there isn't a clarity that comes with actually jumping and of course the aftermath and injuries etc.
Yep because when it comes down to it you’re meant to survive. Sylvia Plath wrote about it in The Bell Jar, how she tried to die by drowning but it didn’t work. Her body was fighting to live. I’ve never understood people who attempt suicide by jumping. Why suffer more? Just get a gun and make it quick.
@@stefuhneexo I second the other reply, but also my experience was I was really struggling with undiagnosed ADHD, and I fell into a mental hole where I’d get a very intense, specific impulse to throw myself out of a high window. Sometimes the brain has Rules about stuff like that.
@@stefuhneexo “Man, these mentally distraught people seeking to end their own lives are acting in a way that I can’t understand.”
Y’know, that IS typically the problem.
Have to recommend God Knows Where I Am (2016) to the list. "The body of a homeless woman is found in an abandoned farmhouse, and a diary documenting a journey of starvation and the loss of sanity lies next to the body. For nearly four months, Linda Bishop, a prisoner of her own mind, survived on apples and rain water during one of the coldest winters on record."
I sat in silence for a long while after watching it.
Thanks for the rec, this sounds amazing and I’m about to go watch it
@@leahrebecca2051 what do you recommend to watch? I have never watched any of these, I’m new
@@masodior8076 definitely There’s something wrong with aunt Diane!
I found that movie on Hulu at like 2am. Like 3 years ago. I think about it way more than pretty much any piece of media I've ever seen.
I was in a class in Middle School for kids with learning issues. When we went to the Holocaust Musium I DIDNT KNOW WHAT THE HOLOCAUST WAS. We learned half of the material the rest of the kids did. My mom (who was chaperoning) gave me a talking to about not laughing if I got uncomfortable and I was all “uh OK?”
Then we went through the Musium and HAD TO GO TO DINNER AFTERWARD. I didn’t want food. I wanted to go back to the hotel and hide under the covers. I didn’t tell anyone that was when I learned about the Holocaust until about a month ago. It would be really easy to trick people with learning issues (like myself) that the Holocaust was somehow different than it was or not real because we never got to that part in school. I was just privileged enough to have parents who wanted me to go on the Washington DC trip to learn. So educate yourself. Watch some documentaries and activate your brains!
I’m sorry you had to find out that way :( ofc it’s great you didn’t get taught misinformation, but it must’ve been scary as hell to find out by seeing all the exhibits with graphic photographs and such
@@jessargo yes. I feel bad for that kid I used to be. I wish my educators could have at least glossed over the hard stuff. It is true. I’m very fortunate to have good parents. They cared to inform me correctly, they just didn’t know that the Holocaust had been skipped in history class.
Edit: This was 2006, so the people I went to school with, are all adults now.
@@gracewinchester-baggins4205 I had a similar learning experience. we went to a park after seeing those types of exhibits in our local holocaust museum. other kids played football while I struggled to get food down. then we saw the dog park and my teacher had to explain to me that I was playing with one of the puppies too roughly. I felt so bad oml
And this is why I will forever be grateful that one of my favorite teachers read us Number the Stars and really talked to us about the Holocaust. Yes, we were young, but something about being explained those horrors in a soft voice made the blow less severe. Like did I have nightmares and understand how horrific it was? Yes. But I've also heard about other people learning about the Holocaust in much worse ways, including in this comment section.
@@W41K.3R I’m sorry it affected you like that. Needless to say, we shouldn’t have had to learn like that. (And I’m sure that those puppies were okay. Still glad your teacher made you aware of yourself)
Ps. The fact that you felt bad for being rough with pups means that you have genuine empathy and were likely traumatized by the Museum. I’m speaking as someone who went through something similar.
"I don't know why her mother named her after a slur..." Probably in tribute of the legendary stripper Gypsy Rose Lee aka Rose Louise Hovick (1911-1970 ). All things considered, that name was maybe one of the *less* abusive things Mother Blanchard inflichted on her defenseless child...
Also was not always considered a slur in the public eye, considering most people back then (and even now) weren’t using it negatively and just didn’t know of the term’s origins. Some words can be viewed as harmless one day and extremely offensive the next, and vice versa.
Nowhere near as bad as H.P. Lovecraft naming his cat something that he knew damn well was not a term of endearment and in fact was a slur he did not shy away from using for the purpose of hateful speech… but we don’t really talk about that…
@@therealCrazyJake Agreed!
@@therealCrazyJakeWhile Lovecraft didn't name that cat, I believe it was named by his grandfather or someone else, he did continue that legacy by naming a cat the same thing in Rats in the Walls.
The most fucked up part of Don't Fuck With Cats was that the internet sleuths caught the wrong guy and drove him to suicide and the whole thing was just completely glossed over because they eventually knew who the real guy was.
The bridge actually triggered me into taking my recovery seriously. Something about knowing that you might fail actually fucked me up so much that I had to stop actively trying to end things.
The Bridge is a fantastic documentary despite of the controversy it took. For me it was the most unsetting documentary I have ever watched. '77 minutes' was the second one
*Honorable Mentions:*
- 3:31 Mondo Cane
- 4:50 Don't Fuck with Cats
- 6:34 Cropsy
- 7:25 Tickled
- 8:40 Mommy Dead and Dearest
- 9:52 Missing 411
- 11:30 The Hunted
*Watch out! category* (too saucy for the list, too saucy for the mentions) (12:54)
- 13:02 Orozco the embalmer
- 13:37 Traces of dead (kinda like faces of death, but not quite)
*The List*
10: Just Melvin, Just Evil (15:11)
9: Night and Fog (16:34)
8: Jesus Camp (18:35)
7: Hated: GG Allin and the Murder Junkies (20:42)
6: The brigde (22:53) (TW: suicide)
5: Dear Zachary (25:00)
4: Africa Addio (27:09) (TW: racism)
-4a: Goodbye Uncle Tom (28:48) (kinda not documentary)
-4b: Cannibal Holocaust (29:04) (I'm not sure if it is a doc or not???)
3: Abducted in plain sight (29:25)
2: Something is wrong with aunt Diane (31:24)
1: Titicut Follies (33:52)
-1a: Paris is Burning (37:16)
-1b: Life itself (I think? She just mentions "the Roger Ebert" one)
cannibal holocaust is in fact fictional!
@@decaying_dante thank god
Traces of “Death”...
@@Bren71319 oh, no! where?
@@trinifernandez8870 in my closet... I have the dvd collection...🤣
In Orozco the Embalmer, he doesn't get embalmed at the end. The film is partially about the aftermath of La Violencia and how Orozco cares for the nameless dead found in the streets of his village and gives them dignity by repairing their bodies. In the end he passes away and becomes another neglected corpse, with nobody around to embalm him. It's a sad cyclical story about human suffering, empathy, and neglect. EXTREMELY graphic medical footage, but a very powerful and touching piece. Def belongs in the 'Watch Out' category haha
"As you know, Bigfoot works with Q directly." Is maybe among the funniest things I've ever heard.
As a Jew, I agree that Night and Fog is something that everyone should watch, to get a full emotional understanding of just how atrocious the Shoah was. There's lots of media out there that sanitize the brutality and almost romanticize the period, and unfortunately holocaust education is being cut from a lot of mandatory curriculum for kids
That's absolutely horrifying where i'm from the holocaust is considered ''common civilized knowledge'' as in SH*T EVERYONE SHOULD KNOW
Shame about Elie Wiesel being in Epstein’s address book.
yeah what they are doing with historical education about the brutality of white people is actually terrifying. legit big brother erasing history so we can repeat it.
@@sinnsage Because, after all, Newspeak isn’t ADDING words, but TAKING them away.
@@theoneandonlymichaelmccormick I can't see your comments bc UA-cam is deleting them very soon after posting, but why would you ever feel the need to bring up epstein on a post that has nothing to do with him, elie wiesel, or anyone he's been connected to?
Southwest of Salem: The story of the San Antonio Four I would give an honorable mention. Basically, 4 lesbian Latina women in the 90’s in San Antonio got falsely accused of molesting two girls who were the niece of one of the accused and because of Homophobia and the “Satanic Ritual Abuse” Panic of the 80’s and 90’s, they were found guilty based on the word of the kids, who turns out where told by their uncle to lie about being molested, because one of the women rejected his advances. I wanna say the last woman got out of jail in 2016. It’s disturbing in the sense of documenting how the criminal system has historically failed LGBTQ+ people, and how easy it is for people to buy into fearmongering and moral panics that have a human cost. Kinda relevant today with Groomer libel being thrown at LGBTQ+ people for just existing around children.
I was forced to go to evangelical camps every summer as a teen and it was a horrific experience. I was already struggling with gender dysphoria so their indoctrination didn't really stick but watching hundreds of other kids being emotionally manipulated every single year was really rough and has left a lasting impact on me
Just Melvin just Evil is really hard to watch, but it does do a good job of showing generational trauma, and complex grief. The funeral scene is a perfect example of it. The people he traumatized (his daughters and sons) are genuinely upset when he dies, yet happy and celebrating in their grief at the same time. It's a wild ride from start to finish.
I'm a 40-year-old woman yet I dressed up like GG allin for Halloween one year when I was 22 and I put brown Maybelline foundation on my arms and face to simulate feces and won a Halloween costume contest at a dive bar in Jacksonville Florida. It was one of the best things that's ever happened in my life.
this tracks with what I've heard about Jacksonville Florida
@@PanAndScanBuddy it's a like a foreign country over there. I'm talking about the natives.
@@lesliemartin3 from Jacksonville, Dad is born and raised Northside boy, can confirm
@@zackbard9420 lol tell your sweet father he's got a kindred spirit in Ft. Lauderdale 💕
Based queen
The way Abducted In Plain Sight unfolds is so wild. By the time they got to the reveal with the dad I felt like I was losing my mind. It was truly breathtaking how passive and naive the entire family seemed through the whole thing. One of those stories that would seem totally unbelievable if it were fiction.
The Act of Killing to me is like the film equivalent of staring into the void. You can't really find a more "evil" subject for a documentary than Anwar, who both directly and indirectly murdered thousands of people.
The film then gives you the difficult task of trying to understand the fact that this person is a human being capable of remorse and guilt for his actions. It's one of the most unique and powerful documentaries you will ever see, but you'll probably only want to watch it once.
I was thinking exactly about this. I cannot think of any other piece of media that has left me feeling so empty and disturbed as this one. It is disturbing at an existential level.
remembering how me (at maybe 12 or 13), my mom, and my sister sat down and watched dear zachary not knowing AT ALL what we were getting into. i cannot believe we just casually watched a documentary so many people consider to be one of the most disturbing. i dont remember a lot of it tho
Man I walked into that movie knowing it was going to be upsetting and it still destroyed me
Why would your mom put that on to watch together..
@Kingofgaymes we literally didn't watch any trailers and thought it was genuinely a sweet doc about a kids dad. The description did not imply the type of doc it would be.
Dear Zachary kinda reinforced my distrust of people, I know that was not the intention of the guy who made it, but I have met so many dodgy and weird people in my life and it really makes it seem like I'm better off living on a homestead by myself. My therapist is going to make an absolute killing.
If documentaries about statewide power over marginalized people are what get to you, then Time: The Kalief Browder Story is definitely a suggestion. It follows a 16 year old black teenager in New York who gets sent Jail over a crime he didn't commit, and because he refused to admit to the crime, he was held in prison while his trial kept getting delayed over the course of three years, two of which were spent in solitary confinement. Not only did Kalief comity suicide by hanging two years after being released, his mother died of a heart attack a year later while in the process of trying to sue the state of New York. The whole thing was so distressing that I was only able to watch this over the course of months, and it's even worse because virtually nothing has changed since then.
hard agree on Jesus Camp. i had a friend, who’s an atheist now, but when she was a teenager when she would come back from an evangelical summer bible camp and was like really into what they said for a few weeks after, fortunately it never stuck by the time school started, but it was really weird to deal with every summer for like 5 years
(also noticed that the description box has the info from the disturbing movie top 10)
Jesus high's are kinda real. I used to go to a bible camp every now and again in the fall and even though I'm not really religious I think that some bible camps are just fun/relaxing. Definitely worth doing when you're growing up.
I've heard similar stories from people who went to bible camps and got super excited about Jesus for like a month lol
@@UhhNon i went to a day camp bc my mom used it as cheap babysitting in the summer it wasn’t run by evangelicals so it wasn’t really intense like the overnight camp she went to and also we didn’t actually go to church so whatever they said never really stuck anyway, but being surrounded by what the energy and rhetoric in the evangelical ones for 24/7 for a couple weeks is def going to mess with your head, it’s just how cult shit works, get a crowd worked up into a singular focus and the human group think thing kicks in and it can happen to anyone of any age
Jesus Camp is a hard watch, even now without the context of the time it was filmed during the Bush administration, the Iraq War, and before the Ted Haggard scandals. It's so disheartening, too.
Yeah, there's batshit chaos moments like kids smashing mugs that represent the government, the red tape segment, and that weird as fuck George Bush cutout. But, I think the one scene that will just forever live in my mind is that one kid, probably no older than 10 or 12, who confessed in front of the entire camp and congregation that he was questioning his faith. You can just hear the guilt in his voice and see the judgement on their faces. It's fuckin' depressing. I will say that I'd be lying if I wouldn't be interested in seeing where they all are now. I was the same age as Levi and them when it came out, so checking out if they separated themselves from the ideology or not would be something for sure.
I got sent to vacation bible school once. The only thing I got out of it was I could hang out in the little arcade and play games and drink milkshakes.
What you said about marginalized groups still being under attack and people not wanting to think about that fact is too true. I am so sorry that you were forced to move because of the absolute garbage state of this country/the world. I hope you are able to settle in comfortably where you are now.
So I live in the area of Bridgewater State Hospital that Titicut Follies was filmed at and really, it hasn't improved much. This year, they were in trouble because they were using chemical restraints on the people there. It is absolutely insane that after all this time, they still treat the people there like absolute trash.
They use Thorazine even in the “good” hospitals these days. Shit puts you out for a couple days in regards to the hangover it leaves
Chemical restraints?
@@bobwalsh3751 Sedatives, essentially.
Disappointing, but not surprising.
The abuse of the mentally ill and the "criminal" is always the vanguard of the techniques used to abuse other marginalised groups.
10:45 As a caver, I seriously believe a lot of the missing persons cases in missing 411 are to do with caves and cave systems.
If you look at a cluster map of missing persons and compare it to a map of cave entrances/systems in North America, a lot of the maps overlap very clearly
There's Something Wrong with Aunt Diane fucked me up. The tragedy, the mystery, the damn phone call of those kids last moments AND those images from the scene of the accident. Horrific. And then the family having to grapple with the notion that maybe they didn't know their loved one as much as they thought they did. Gut wrenching stuff.
Tickled is genuinely jaw dropping. What a weird story. You are right, it's not disturbing though.
Possibly the most important question in punk history: did the people who paid money to watch GG Allin take a shit on stage get their money's worth or not? I mean on the one hand, obviously no, but on the other hand, imagine being able to tell people for the rest of your life that you were there.
I hear that he’d shit on stage and people would just leave because the smell was too much to bear
It’d depend on how much the tickets cost.
But I’m willing to hazard on the side of it being worth it for the story.
thanks may, you're honestly doing amazing work, i really appreciate the effort to make sure that if people are going to watch horrible nightmare stuff then at least it's going to be good horrible nightmare stuff. You mentioned wanting to make folks happy right at the end there, so i have an idea- have you considered making a list of perhaps like the weirdest comfort movies? like films that are weird or disturbing or very avant-garde that have something uplifting about them anyway? idk just an idea im watching this while i have a headache i love your work and i really need to get around to buying your book
I think this is a super good idea.
PLEASE DO THIS MAY🙏🙏🙏🙏
I really liked The Emperor's Naked Army Marches On (Yuki Yukite Shingun).
It's a Film about a Japanese WWII ex-soldier who confronts his former comrades and officers about the atrocities and crimes they committed in New Guinea (including cannibalizing of the civilian population and low-ranking privates).
It's absolutely wild and the guy (Kenzō Okuzaki), an anarchist who was in prison for assaulting the Emperor is equally insane and awesome.
Prophet's Prey deserves an honorable mention. The FLDS community is a nightmare world and Warren Jeffs is a terrifying predator.
The Act of Killing is disturbing in an In Cold Blood kind of way. Where you're actually getting to talk to people who committed a massacre some of them are very sympathetic
I was going to suggest this, too.
in a strange way, that movie was like an unflinching challenge towards the idea of restorative justice. it showed the many moving parts that compels regular human beings to commit terrible atrocities, dares to show the most tender and occasionally reflective moments of the killers, and then will cut to a scene of soldiers lazing around and vocally reminiscing about all the teenagers they gleefully raped.
There's a companion piece to that movie- "The look of silence"
Making the Act of Killing was a way of distracting the killers for long enough to get the guy interviewing them in "The look of silence" spirited away to safety out of the country
Fact: Gypsy Rose is named for Gypsy Rose Lee a burlesque dancer who had a wild stage mom.
The play Gypsy is about her.
You filming this on your messy bedroom floor is a vibe
A friend of mine in college actually worked with the family who’s kids Diane killed in the car crash. They still believed she was innocent and just accidentally crashed even though a whole house of drugs were found in her system.
I still go back and forth on this one, did she have everyone convinced she was the perfect mom and actually hated her family?
@@leahrebecca2051 Possibly. The impression I got from talking to my friend, was that the family of the kids Diane killed are still deeply in denial about what actually happened and are still convinced to this day that Diane never had substance abuse issues and was it was all just a tragic random accident.
I think it’s more likely that Diane was good at hiding her demons and addictions from others until it was too late.
Dear Zachary is soooo sad. I worked at a video rental place and picked it up just off the cover art. That shit made me seriously cry. Crazy they gave all this footage
just wanted to let you know that i read fluids over the past 24h and absolutely loveddd it. i’m a blossoming tr&nny living like 4h from moore,ok so it really literally hit home. thank you for being so vulnerable and sharing your art !! if not for yourself keep up the good work for me, your new biggest fan ❤️
Great list! I would recommend to you
(not pointing out what you missed, just trading a list for a list):
Sick: The Life & Death of Bob Flanagan (1997)
Paragraph 175 (2000)
Chicken Hawk: Men Who Love Boys (1994)
The Video Diary of Ricardo Lopez (2000)
Stevie (2002)
Capturing The Friedmans (2003)
Hearts & Minds (1974)
Tarnation (2003)
Gray Matter (2004)
Mr. Death: The Rise & Fall of Fred A. Leuchter, Jr. (1999)
Some are obvious, some are extremely hard to watch.
There is a documentary about Jacopetti and Prosperi called Godfathers of Mondo (2003). I haven't seen it in a while, but I remember it giving some interesting insight into what the heck was going through their heads when they were making such outrageous films.
Technically, Gypsy Rose was named after famed stripper Gypsy Rose Lee. As far as messed up documentaries, there's one called The Business of Being Born. I believe it has a sequel now too. It's essentially an attempt to scare parents-to-be out of trusting doctors when it comes to pregnancy and childbirth. And you get to see Ricki Lake naked while giving birth, so that made me uncomfortable.
Thanks for that. I was hoping somebody beside me knew about GRLee.
She was named after a stripper??????
Just curious, but does the movie actually offer any good reasoning for distrusting doctors with childbirth?
The whole Missing 411 conspiracy is deeply rooted in racism and classism if you ask me. The woods, and nature in general, is a lot less merciful than most people think, getting disoriented and therefore getting lost is not rare (even for experienced hikers/outdoor enthusiasts), and things like hypothermia and exposure are dangerous. But it's easier for people to blame it on some mysterious "savages" (rooted in racist anti-Native American history, which depicts Natives as barbaric, violent and primitive), or "uncivilized" madmen (rooted in the classist, harmful stereotypes about Appalachian people, which depicts them as "inbred hillbillies" or "aggressive mountain men").
While i see where you're coming from i cant say there's enough explicit mentions of either of those stereotypes for me to be convinced of that
I don’t think I’ve ever heard people blame it on “savages” or something. It’s usually like… Bigfoot or aliens or a government conspiracy or some other inherent crazy supernatural force from another dimension that just happens in the woods. It’s all nonsense obviously but I think calling it racist and classist is a little ridiculous.
finally messy girl rep. sick of seeing youtubers with no shit all over their floors.
i was just binging your disturbing movies videos and i was wondering "man how cool would it be if may made a video about disturbing documentaries specifically" and now i see this in my feed. QUEEN SHIT. love you may, hope you're doing well!
Ill never forget my first highschool holocaust unit. My teacher was super cool and he was great at what he did, usually he was pretty funny and jovial but we came in one day (after a few days of him telling us how bad it was going to be) and he was totally stone faced. We sat down and he just straight up showed us footage of people starved to death being thrown into pits for an hour, just real actual footage from back then. It was fucking horrible. It was really really bad but it was necessary. After years and years of people going "hitler was bad i guess, holocaust was bad I guess" in a very vague very nonspecific way he showed us exactly why it was atrocious, explained to us exactly why war is the worst thing people can do to each other, and how WWII came to be.
the documentary about the aunt driving the wrong way down the highway was TOTALLY wild. so so bizarre and i think about it often bcs of how perplexing the case is!!
I think Aunt Dianne was a closeted alcoholic and her family just couldn't face that.
when i first really squirmed out from under my family's evangelical thumb i watched jesus camp more than once as a reminder of what i was getting away from and get a weird sense of comfort from the fact that yes, this shit was actually being discussed and publicized to a degree and maybe someday something could be done about it
agree that tickled is definitely fucking WILD and incredibly fascinating but tbh it didn't leave me quite as shaken as the others
I'm from Staten Island and I asked all the Staten Islanders adults in my life if they had heard of Cropsey growing up and they all said no lol. Must be a very Greenbelt-area rumor, but the documentary was very "ALL Staten Islanders know this legend, oooOOooOOo"
Anyway great list :) thanks May
related to the missing 411 bit, cases where children just vanish scare me. like marjorie west in 1938; she was picnicking with her family, her older sister walked a few feet to give their mother some flowers she picked, and when they turned around marjorie was gone. she most likely just wandered off and died of exposure, but the fact no sign of her has been found since when she was *right there* is so chilling
The woods can be a disorienting place, and human perception has more flaws in it than we’d prefer there to be.
@@theoneandonlymichaelmccormick pedophiles were more rural back then also
At this point, I feel like "Missing 411" has become my sleeper cell agent phrase. Absolutely HATE everything to do with Missing 411 and everyone who touts it. For context: I live next to a national park. My family used to live inside said national park. If you go to the museums around the national park, there are even pictures of my family that are there in a historical context and my family can pick them out for you. I assure you, nothing weird is going on in national parks. The simple reality is often that tourists don't know how to behave themselves or read the very clear warning signs (I am looking at you! All of the people who want to feed the wildlife or get too close to them! You would be surprised by how many rich, white tourists just don't realize that the woods are not their personal playground to go act like fairytale princesses in!), and they often get hurt in very, very preventable ways. Reminds me a lot of my volunteering at our local zoo, actually: quite a lot of the fences and the barriers are specifically to stop visitors from getting too close and putting themselves in dangerous situations. Just obscenely frustrating for me.
Didn't grow up in the parks like that, but as someone from Alaska, I get you. It's almost like nature doesn’t come with safety rails, or something.
Quick note - Kanopy (and similar service Hoopla) is also available from a lot of public libraries, as well, not just universities
I remember when I was in high school, we were in a production of the Diary of Anne Frank, and to give us more context our directors took us to the Holocaust museum in Dallas and had us watch 2 full hours of interviews with Holocaust survivors, and that viewing experience has never left me
'Abducted in Plain Sight' is wild. I would also recommend 'Hole in the Head' about people who drill holes in their own skulls due to a belief that it makes them happier.
I've lost count how many times I've seen Dear Zachary. I like watching the beginning where everyone talks about how much they love Andrew and wouldn't you know it I'm watching the whole thing again
It's been a long time coming for this and I'm absolutely delighted by the list.
Edit: Oh, since you mentioned Joe Francis (who did Girls Gone Wild), he's behind the Banned in America / Banned from Television series - not Traces of Death.
Edit 2: If anyone is looking for another documentary to check out, Capturing the Friedmans might be of interest and can be a companion piece to Just Melvin, Just Evil. It centers on the Friedman family, a seemingly average family from a suburban community in New York, who were thrown into the spotlight after the father and one of his sons were accused of sexually abusing the young students of a computer class they ran out of the house. A significant portion of it is told through home video footage, especially in the aftermath of the news coming in, and is just... a lot.
Abducted in Plain sight was the craziest most Mormon shit I’ve ever seen and I live in Utah.
Dear Zachary is the saddest damn story. Aunt Diane also sad but so weird and confusing and unresolved that it becomes the dominant emotion.
Idk how aunt Diane was confusing. She was drunk.
@@HeatherHolt yup you cracked the case gumshoe
I watched Dear Zachary in high school and it traumatized me so bad. It was the first time I had really been confronted with how horrible and unfair the world is. I couldn't even finish it and to this day I have never tried watching it again. It's an amazing film though
Earthlings! I was actually low-key surprised it wasn't on the disturbing movies iceberg on tier 6. I found it way more disturbing than the likes of Faces of Death and Black Metal Veins which were on that tier.
I’m too scared to see that movie or Dominion. I’m afraid I won’t be able to enjoy my mom’s sopes or pozole ever again if I see them.
@@Frijolero18 Yeah, I went vegan overnight after seeing it. I only started eating animal products again because I got extremely thin and my doctor basically told me I had to. tbf I don't live in the US.
I didn’t even finish it and that night went vegan. Been vegan for 6 year now lol
@@ambertheanxious One of the most devastating things I have ever seen and I don't blame you for not finishing it. It made me cry which movies/documentaries very rarely do. It upset me more than the likes of MDPOPE.
@@ambertheanxious Oh and congrats on 6 years, that's amazing. I did it mostly for the animals but the health benefits were ASTONISHING. My hair and skin were glowing and it was the only time in my life I really had ENERGY.
Dear Zachary tore my insides out and I cried so hard, it scared me. I never felt that kind of grief. I hope I’ll never come close to that again. The documentary was so well done. The family and friends are so sincerely wonderful and loved him so much and he deserved it. How his close friend was able to make the documentary is a testament to the love he had for his friend. That is what makes the story so soul crushing.
Missing 411 is what you get when not enough people read Hatchet as a kid
Or the rest of the works of Gary Paulsen. Or even stuff by Jack London. Nature can kill you and destroy your body in an infinite number of fun and creative ways but people don't wanna admit that. It's easier for some to come up with an insane conspiracy theory than it is to admit that they're a small part of a vast and unforgiving world.
Hatchet made me wanna live in the woods so bad
every time you upload it's like Christmas to me you are literally my favourite person on the whole Internet
I remember watching tickled and just getting fuckef up in the head to realize the extent of rich people's power and how many situations that are even worse we are not even aware of.
Also, I know this is a random comment, i hope it doesnt make you feel uncomfortable but you look great in this video! Loved the red glasses!
0:05 on the contrary Ms. May. I actually watch this content on VHS, and also am commenting on this video through a letter sent to my internet liaison.
Paradise Lost personally fucked me up a bit. To clarify: not the court trial or the story that we’re following. Specifically the fact that they show footage and photos of the dead kids and just straight up pics of the mutilated genitalia. It just felt unnecessary and exploitative and I wish I hadn’t seen it. I wanted to know about the West Memphis Three and think about how fucked that whole case is, but the very explicit footage of the kids was really upsetting and felt like, idk, a further invasion of privacy and just disrespectful to these victims. You know?
Paradise Lost and the 2 sequels were imo the best docs ever made.
But yes, I agree. When they opened the 1st one with actual pics of those little boys, I almost skipped the film.
Dear Zachary DESTROYED ME, I would not recommend it to anyone who’s having a really bad time. If you think you can handle it, it’s beautifully made and genuinely the most heart wrenching thing I’ve ever seen.
So, I saw Jesus Camp back in high-school. Our religious studies teacher showed it to us.
Honestly it was some of the most disturbing shit I've ever seen and sparked my still prevalent belief that there's really not much difference between an organised religion and a cult.
I was told to never think about the future or interact with society because my personal zombie buddy was going to come destroy my enemies any moment now.
Absolutely agree
What did they show it to you for?
@@theoneandonlymichaelmccormick religious studies course is what the comment says. I’m guessing it was to show the fanatical side of Christianity
@@HeatherHolt Well, no kidding.
My specific question was the intended message meaning to be gained from the viewing experience.
Like, if I was a religious studies teacher I’d need a pretty specific mission statement if I’m gonna show kids something that’s liable to put them off religion.
May has got to be my favorite Goblin woman, every month or so I just binge watch every one of these top 10 videos, good stuff
you have such a fun energy while talking about such despicable things.. i almost forgot what i was watching because i was just so enchanted by how silly you are and how many little dark jokes you sprinkle in that made me giggle. good vids. good vids.
I remember watching Just Melvin on UA-cam when I was probably like 13-14 and I must’ve literally just looked up “p*dophile” or “child m*lestation” or something. I completely blocked out that memory until you mentioned it in one of your other videos and suddenly it hit me like a truck. I distinctly remember looking it up because I wanted to hear those graphic accounts of exactly what happened to the survivors because I was going through the same thing at the time and it was like… almost pornographic for me as a kid bc my little messed up baby brain was like “oh yeah! That’s what’s hot, that’s what sex is. A bunch of men do that stuff to me and I know that makes them like me, so it’s sexy obviously.” Not good times. Not fun. Would not recommend.
thank you for your presence 💗
That's actually so sad, I'm so sorry. I hope you're out of that situation.
@alexlloyd5348 oh yeah dw I am now lol. Turns out completely average men seem a lot less appealing when you’re not a dumb sheltered kid and actually have a developed brain.
i had to turn off jesus camp 20 minutes in because it reminded me of my religiously traumatic childhood growing up christian! so when this was on ur list i was like ! yay! someone looks at this and doesnt think of it as a normal or okay documentary because i lived through that and it is in fact deeply traumatic!
night and fog is the most important doc I've ever watched, I seriously think it should be a mandatory part of high school curriculum
I remember being amused by Jesus Camp when it first came out, then re-watching it post-Trump and realizing the kids in it where now in their 20s and therefore old enough to vote…. It kind of ruined my week…
I love you. Thank you for all your recommendations I've had the worst depression this week.
Hey I hadn't heard you left TX. Congrats on your move - hope you and your partner are feeling more secure in your new home.
We watched Night and Fog for a Holocaust course during my second year of university and I especially remember the scenes with bulldozers being burned into my brain. I'm glad I saw such a powerful documentary but damn do those images still haunt me.
Cropsey and Titicut Follies are both pretty similar. While Cropsey is about specifically a urban legend, what I took away from it was that mental healthcare SUUUCKED
The Rewind documentary was awful I wasn’t expecting what it ended up being (horrific child abuse and incest) and was thrown off guard. Really heartbreaking stuff.
Been dying for another video from you! Your voice and humor always make my day better
Re: "Why is she named after a slur?", she is named for famous burlesque performer, Gypsy Rose Lee. So, yes, still a slur, but the name is from enough decades ago that white ppl didn't think it was a slur.
The best thing about Mondo Cane is that Mike Patton named a beautiful band after it.
The Gypsy Rose story has also been made into a TV series called The Act which is pretty good. It's a disturbing and sad story.
I’m always happy for a new video from
May about disturbing things, though you do talk about disturbing things you do it in a way that’s… so pleasant to hear. Strangely.
Thank you for being the first person on UA-cam to pronounce Mondo Cane properly
I've only just discovered this channel but this person is hilarious! I love it.
Just found you on my homepage the other day and have been binging your videos starting with your oldest, I'm absolutely loving your content!
Abducted in plain sight had me screaming at my tv. The parents are the literal worst parents on the planet earth. Like how can you be convinced to let a stranger sleep in your kids bed.
Amen about dear Zachary. It is one of the better made documentaries I’ve ever seen. But by the end of it, I was snot dribbling ugly crying. I have always told people that it’s worth watching, but I will never watch it again.
The Bridge used to be available to watch on youtube back in 2011ish because I watched it when I was peak psychosis and ready to hang myself, but instead watched other people make the choice and somehow it was cathartic and kept me going... also hearing from the guy that jumped and changed his mind and turned his body around before impact and broke his legs, got me thinking about if I messed up my suicide attempt and it backed me up enough to get help. Very tragic documentary, the final suicide of the man it follows through a lot of it still lives in my mind.
"Good Night Sugar Babe" is disturbing and rage inducing as fuck
May!! thank you for existing... I absolutely loved Tickled... if you want a rec, Sick: The Life and Death of Bob Flanagan, Supermasochist will never leave my brain
You've become my favorite pessimestic saterical internet intellectual
this video is aggressively hyperpop and i'm here for it.
I am always thrilled to see your stuff pop up on my UA-cam homepage. Rock on.
This is a very interesting and informative series. Have you thought about making top 10 disturbing music videos - video? That would be a neat subject.
You are absolutely fantastic! Brilliant stuff, as always
I generally prefer content with more visual background than creator narrative, but I found your overview and delivery of each clip really interesting and enjoyable.
Great job 👌
you are doing spiritual labor equivalent of a nun in modern times, processing all this horrible forms of fiction and audiovisual
I send u big hugs if u see this, i really like your videos and the things you say in the beginning. I feel u transcend
my uncle works in a library and they were throwing out multiple vhs copies of titicut follies from the 80s! i have some of them now and i had no idea they were rare-ish
May! It's good to see you, I was wondering how you are. I probably missed some of your videos in the chaos that I call a life. Love the Ouija pillow, btw.
BABE WAKE UP NEW NYXFEARS DROPPED