Demolition Man - Nostalgia Critic

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  • Опубліковано 26 гру 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 4,4 тис.

  • @Diplomats93
    @Diplomats93 8 років тому +1631

    I met Rob Schneider at the Laugh Factory in LA a couple months ago and asked him about the sea shells. His reply: "They still haven't told me."

    • @titusmccarthy
      @titusmccarthy 8 років тому +159

      What is Rob Schneider doing at a place called the Laugh Factory?

    • @niallreid7664
      @niallreid7664 8 років тому +140

      +Titus McCarthy Trying to burn it down.

    • @titusmccarthy
      @titusmccarthy 8 років тому +71

      I would've thought he'd be refused entry for being so painfully unfunny.

    • @titusmccarthy
      @titusmccarthy 7 років тому +6

      *****
      +1000000

    • @MutaScale
      @MutaScale 7 років тому +61

      From what i hear, he's one of the nicest guys in Hollywood, so while it'd be fun to sock him in the face for... 80% of his filmography, I'd also feel bad about it too.

  • @timokampwerth1996
    @timokampwerth1996 5 років тому +769

    "Is it a comedy? Is it an action film? Is it smart commentary? Is it dumb Violence?"
    only valid answer: Yes.

    • @Mountainkaiju004
      @Mountainkaiju004 3 роки тому +2

      Too which one yes

    • @Zelink108
      @Zelink108 3 роки тому

      “Smart Commentary” I think you mean just more bullshit US political ranting.

    • @SilverHairedFreak25
      @SilverHairedFreak25 2 роки тому +5

      We in the art department call it "a happy accident".

    • @kylemorello4787
      @kylemorello4787 2 роки тому

      That's my favorite answer.

    • @Jfreek5050
      @Jfreek5050 2 роки тому +2

      Correction
      IT IS PROPHECY

  • @LordBaktor
    @LordBaktor 5 років тому +512

    I actually like that Spartan's advice at the end is "well, you'll figure it out". He is encouraging them to learn to think by themselves instead of listening to a figurehead.

    • @louisduarte8763
      @louisduarte8763 3 роки тому +61

      In the words of Brian Cohen: "Listen, you don't need to follow me! You don't need to follow anybody! You've got to work it out for yourselves! You're all individuals!"
      Crowd: "Yes! We are all individuals!"

    • @LordBaktor
      @LordBaktor 3 роки тому +15

      @@louisduarte8763 One of the most underrated moments in Life of Brian.

    • @seansilv25
      @seansilv25 2 роки тому +9

      And in the words of Ezio Auditore:
      “We don’t need anyone to tell us what to do. Not the Savonarola, not the Medici. We are free to follow our own path. There are those who will take that freedom from us... To many of you gladly give it. But it is our ability to choose, whatever YOU think is true, that makes us human. There is no book or teacher to give you the answers, to show you the path. Choose your own way. Do not follow me, or anyone else”

    • @MrMarinus18
      @MrMarinus18 2 роки тому +7

      It's kind of ironic to call that Spartan as it was absolutely against Spartan values. Sparta was one of the most ultimate displays in crushing individualism and free thought. Spartan men were absolutely discouraged from figuring anything out on their own. They are only there to serve the people who matter and their fellow men.
      Sparta was the master of the Phalanx and in a phalanx individual fighting ability is almost entirely meaningless, the only thing that matters is the cohesion of the unit as a whole.

    • @davidjsaul
      @davidjsaul 2 роки тому +5

      @@MrMarinus18 I'm sure they just called him Spartan because it sounded cool, not because his great grandad was Kratos.

  • @Logovanni
    @Logovanni 4 роки тому +1182

    A future where people are afraid of touching each other and no toilet paper. Oh man

    • @amehak1922
      @amehak1922 4 роки тому +71

      EirikurDC so we'll find out how the sea shells work soon.

    • @MonaGC.
      @MonaGC. 4 роки тому +16

      @@amehak1922 it was told in 2006. 2 are used to push whatever is on the sides to the middle. The 3rd is used to grab that all

    • @valkiron11
      @valkiron11 4 роки тому +28

      They defunded the police, too

    • @afrog2666
      @afrog2666 4 роки тому +4

      No, El Gusanillo Del Juego is pretty much on point with that one

    • @elizabethtrudgill3567
      @elizabethtrudgill3567 4 роки тому +1

      They knew.

  • @gothamsreckoning8391
    @gothamsreckoning8391 6 років тому +979

    But Stallone can’t break the law because... HE IS THE LAAAWW!

  • @friday6448
    @friday6448 7 років тому +819

    He "outlawed all crime"...? Who knew that all we had to do to achieve world peace was to just make crime illegal?

    • @b3rz3rk3r9
      @b3rz3rk3r9 6 років тому +39

      Man, I thought it was obvious.

    • @halojoe1028
      @halojoe1028 6 років тому +14

      thats what i thought

    • @drumguy1384
      @drumguy1384 6 років тому +26

      An outlaw is someone who is cast out of society. Friendly and the others in the underground are outlaws. Outlawing crime doesn't mean making crime illegal. It means outlawing anyone who commits a crime. Crime by definition is illegal. Outlawing crime literally means permanently removing anyone who commits crime from society.

    • @b3rz3rk3r9
      @b3rz3rk3r9 6 років тому +10

      @@drumguy1384 That sounds something close to what North Korea does. Except that the Country in question tortures them in a concentration camp with their family and their descendants for THREE GENERATIONS.

    • @drumguy1384
      @drumguy1384 6 років тому +12

      Starman Gaming, I don't think so. Cocteau's Utopia would gladly allow any of the underground dwellers to leave if they agreed to never return. Outlaws are still free, arguably more free than their counterparts. Not so in "Best Korea".

  • @AgentVamp
    @AgentVamp 6 років тому +538

    I found the answer from Stallone and the writer himself in an interview!
    Q: For the love of all that is good and Holy. How do you use the 3 seashells?!
    A: OK, this may be bordering on the grotesque, but the way it was explained to me by the writer is you hold two seashells like chopsticks, pull gently and scrape what's left with the third. You asked for it... Be careful what you ask for, sorry.

  • @alexconn7473
    @alexconn7473 5 років тому +320

    I always thought that the three shells were really just buttons that initiated different kinds of cleaning procedures for one's rear end like rinse, deep clean and quick cleaning

    • @heatherreagan8078
      @heatherreagan8078 4 роки тому +30

      I figured that one squirted you with water to rinse everything off, the second blasted air to dry, and the third was a squirt of perfume.

    • @TheMoose126
      @TheMoose126 4 роки тому +21

      I'm interested in hearing more about this "Deep Cleaning" feature you speak of..

    • @GoatPopsicle
      @GoatPopsicle 4 роки тому +16

      Just advanced bidets incorporated into the toilet, like you can buy in Japan and S.Korea.
      Soap - Rinse - Blow dry.

    • @kylemendoza8860
      @kylemendoza8860 3 роки тому

      @@heatherreagan8078 I think the third one does that. I believe the first two pull the fecal matter out. Just my theory.

    • @VJK102
      @VJK102 3 роки тому

      Maybe the movie forsaw One Piece's Dials

  • @Lunaneko.14
    @Lunaneko.14 8 років тому +2251

    Reporter: "What can you say about destroying a 7 million dollar mall for a girl who's ransom is only $24,000?"
    Little Girl: "Fuck You Lady!!!!"
    Best line ever

    • @streetman23
      @streetman23 8 років тому +65

      Ashley McGuire so true. Could not stop laughing when I first heard it

    • @maggiew.2755
      @maggiew.2755 8 років тому +100

      Seriously, fuck reporters like that.

    • @MarvelKing-ie2tu
      @MarvelKing-ie2tu 8 років тому +25

      "Give him all our money"

    • @hitmanwolf
      @hitmanwolf 8 років тому +77

      not only is the girl's line funny, but the fact that most Hero Movies were pretty much over-using that cliche.
      it was a joke within a joke.

    • @manoftruth0935
      @manoftruth0935 8 років тому +10

      I say "Merica bitch!"

  • @TheOnlyTherazan
    @TheOnlyTherazan 7 років тому +243

    "Is it a comedy, is it an action film, is it smart commentary, is it dumb violence?" It's the proof none of the above is mutually exclusive.

    • @GintaSuiseiseki
      @GintaSuiseiseki 6 років тому +6

      And it is soon to be reality....in.....the same California.. what a time to live.

  • @illiniguy34
    @illiniguy34 4 роки тому +420

    At this time with everyone buying all the damn toilet paper, I too would like to know how to use the 3 seashells.

    • @fingolfirn8189
      @fingolfirn8189 4 роки тому +8

      Another prediction of The movie.

    • @JediPeaceWalker
      @JediPeaceWalker 4 роки тому +3

      That was my first thought also.

    • @__Insanity_
      @__Insanity_ 4 роки тому +2

      I want to like it but I don't wanna ruin the 69

    • @remyrichardson8614
      @remyrichardson8614 4 роки тому +1

      @@__Insanity_ Then let's try to get it to 420!

    • @jinifith
      @jinifith 4 роки тому +1

      They must have bidet that has voice recognition in it. Wash, Dry, Stop, etc. Demolition Man also came to my mind as pandemic progressed.

  • @BrendanJSmith
    @BrendanJSmith 4 роки тому +122

    This is honestly one of Doug’s best reviews ever.

  • @ced214
    @ced214 6 років тому +357

    He disguises himself as Dennis Rodman the menace 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂I literally spit soda everywhere

    • @jaretthacker9058
      @jaretthacker9058 5 років тому +2

      I would like this comment but its better leaving it at 69

    • @jasondyrkacz8270
      @jasondyrkacz8270 4 роки тому

      @@jaretthacker9058 You can like it now.

    • @triggaj4y
      @triggaj4y 4 роки тому +1

      When they getting dragged out of court and he yelled he didn’t pay his taxes that’s what got me 😂

  • @DesertBloodRose457
    @DesertBloodRose457 6 років тому +65

    "Fuck you lady!"
    Best line in the movie, and also the most relatable line in the movie as well.

  • @FlurryJoe
    @FlurryJoe 8 років тому +1343

    I lost my shit when the little girl said "Fuck You" to that reporter. My God, movies back then were epic.

    • @Shangori
      @Shangori 8 років тому +76

      'But at least we don't let dirty words destroy our children anymore'
      ~Tumblr

    • @Cybermat47
      @Cybermat47 8 років тому +58

      +Shangori you realise that tumblr is mostly porn, right?

    • @umbra1091
      @umbra1091 8 років тому +18

      +Shangori a prime example of not knowing how to make a joke but trying anyway

    • @davidclark8534
      @davidclark8534 8 років тому +3

      +Cybermat47 I see no problems with that. Futa be praised (soul ascension)

    • @fedos
      @fedos 8 років тому +29

      +Cybermat47 Seriously, who uses Tumblr for anything other than porn?

  • @DrDolan2000
    @DrDolan2000 5 років тому +194

    "So I can't eat chicken or steak, I can swear, I can't even have physical sex with anyone?"
    "Yes"
    "PUT ME BACK IN THE FREEZER!!"

  • @ByrneMJames
    @ByrneMJames 8 років тому +666

    Funny how Pizza hut won the franchise wars in the european version.

    • @mkratos17
      @mkratos17 8 років тому +37

      I think it's part of the joke that the worst franchises should win out. the only way this happens is through mergers and acquisitions because they are both terrible.

    • @ByrneMJames
      @ByrneMJames 8 років тому +23

      I hadnt thought about it that way. A satirisation of corporate culture...
      The bit I think is funny is unintentional tho The actors didnt do different takes for different product placement. The editors just overdubbed the bits where they say taco bell and its really obvious.
      You can see Stallone saying taco bell, moving his head to emphasise the syllables in the name... but you hear (plainly some other guy saying) pizza hut.

    • @mkratos17
      @mkratos17 8 років тому +10

      ByrneMJames that's funny it might have been unintentionally done lol another thing they might have predicted is the rise of celebrity politicians the governator comes to mind

    • @ByrneMJames
      @ByrneMJames 8 років тому +12

      yeah half the cast of Predator becoming governers. Demolition man was fairly prescient

    • @daogenify
      @daogenify 7 років тому +1

      In Sweden the subtitles just says Pizza Hut. Pretty fucking stupid.

  • @calamusgladiofortior2814
    @calamusgladiofortior2814 6 років тому +633

    Demolition Man and Idiocracy are a perfect pairing of social commentary on today's world.

    • @daelen.cclark
      @daelen.cclark 5 років тому +28

      I wonder if the writers of this movie found out about how surprisingly accurate they were?

    • @GoatPopsicle
      @GoatPopsicle 5 років тому +5

      Arthur Williams The US mostly, not the world. We’re pretty much the same in Canada, with only a slight turn to the Left politically.

    • @davidtucker9498
      @davidtucker9498 5 років тому +40

      @@GoatPopsicle "slight turn" to the Left... Canada just fined a comedian $42,000 for telling a JOKE about a disabled person a DECADE ago... Your Prime Minister is a guy who insists on saying "peoplekind" instead of "mankind", yet repeatedly and publicly wore blackface... Yeah, this movie's society IS Canada today...

    • @ellnats
      @ellnats 5 років тому +4

      especially the later

    • @thenameless2379
      @thenameless2379 4 роки тому +16

      Idiocracy is by far the scariest movie for me because it is definitely what is happening in today's society

  • @ZergrushEddie
    @ZergrushEddie 4 роки тому +78

    The “I dunno, you’ll figure it out” is pretty inline with the character. He’s a a tough-guy cop from 1996 that has no damn idea how this failed-utopia came about, what diplomacy could he give than to tell the authoritarian “lighten up” and the anarchist “take a shower”?

  • @zaphael0
    @zaphael0 5 років тому +789

    Me in 2009: "Wow this movie is dumb..."
    Me in 2019: ".......This movie is kinda terrifying."

    • @Samwise_Ass
      @Samwise_Ass 5 років тому +2

      Why's that?

    • @PannierLaw
      @PannierLaw 5 років тому +54

      Sam Christenson ,Because our society is becoming more, and more like the one in this movie

    • @randomguy2518
      @randomguy2518 5 років тому +27

      Crossed with Idiocrocy

    • @sandman299us
      @sandman299us 5 років тому +4

      And because of the changes in the climate and weather patterns, we will end up eating a food substitute like Soylent Green.

    • @LittleTed1000
      @LittleTed1000 5 років тому +2

      @@sandman299us
      That's not going to happen. The price of food will rise. If you live in a rich country you'll be fine. If you live in a poor country you'll face food shortages (especially protein) and malnutrition. You don't get soylent green unless you can pay for it. If you can pay for it you can pay for actual food.

  • @evilemster3047
    @evilemster3047 8 років тому +969

    "But he didn't say 'Would you kindly' "
    Love it :D

    • @personalyoutubeorwhatever
      @personalyoutubeorwhatever 8 років тому +4

      Agreed it was amazing

    • @Herba2
      @Herba2 8 років тому +34

      "Would You Kindly head to Ryan's office and kill the son of a bitch...."

    • @TheToxicRose
      @TheToxicRose 8 років тому

      raido stacic agrred

    • @droideka1890
      @droideka1890 8 років тому +2

      dem Bioshock references

    • @Darth_Melek
      @Darth_Melek 8 років тому +23

      "A man chooses a slave obeys"

  • @dpop0923
    @dpop0923 7 років тому +299

    HEY I resent that joke about LA in 1996
    We looked like that in 1997

    • @UnknownUnknown-mo7zg
      @UnknownUnknown-mo7zg 6 років тому +6

      A lot of it had to do with arsonists though. If I recall correctly there was a prolific arsonist in CA that set hundreds of fire before he was caught. Also, let's not forget mother nature hates CA. So if it wasn't a person doing it, it was the police force shooting and killing and beating black people for being black.

    • @dragoninthewest1
      @dragoninthewest1 6 років тому +5

      Yeah! Wait.. what?

    • @seriousbismuth2173
      @seriousbismuth2173 6 років тому

      *....oof*

    • @Lockpickingblacksmith
      @Lockpickingblacksmith 5 років тому +4

      @@UnknownUnknown-mo7zg How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb? Nobody knows. They always arrest the light for being broke and beat the room for black.

    • @grubbybum3614
      @grubbybum3614 5 років тому

      What's the point of this channel? If you're feeling nostalgic, just rewatch the movie. This video is just spoilers.

  • @Jirwemthegreat
    @Jirwemthegreat 8 років тому +495

    So... This movie is dated... But also ahead of it's time..?
    WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!?

    • @Xahnel
      @Xahnel 8 років тому +68

      +Jirwemthegreat That's called 'timeless'.

    • @Lyone_of_Stormwind
      @Lyone_of_Stormwind 8 років тому +14

      Sorcery of the warp

    • @pheunithpsychic-watertype9881
      @pheunithpsychic-watertype9881 7 років тому +15

      Like 2001. alien. Blade runner and network

    • @TheNervousAnna
      @TheNervousAnna 6 років тому +10

      Whoever wrote it saw the bullshit coming a mile away and tried to warn us with this film

    • @b3rz3rk3r9
      @b3rz3rk3r9 6 років тому +4

      I think that's why people liked "Cell," that Stephen King film about where all devices turns humanity into raving zombies. It's dated from the use of flip phones and smart phones, but timeless becuase it teaches us not to become absorbed into our devices.

  • @comiccinema8177
    @comiccinema8177 3 роки тому +73

    4:38 I am appalled that I’ve seen nobody talk about Malcolm’s gestures here. They are absolutely perfect and so fucking hilarious.

    • @rickyray2794
      @rickyray2794 7 місяців тому

      LOL, same here. That part always makes me belly laugh.

  • @derptomistic
    @derptomistic 6 років тому +390

    The Franchise Wars were a dreadful time that left millions dead and millions more homeless. It all started when Wendy's started calling out McDonalds for their frozen hamburger meat, which began a small proxy war in South America for some reason. Then Burger King got involved and sent his legions of Patty Flippers into Spain for... some reason. Then KFC launched a nuke at Zimbabwe for reasons beyond comprehension. The war continued from there, with fronts being created in Africa, Europe, and Central America as the warring parties struggled for control. It all ended when Taco Bell built the Death Star and blew up Mars, the headquarters for McDonalds. Upon realizing this, the other factions backed down, and Taco Bell reigned supreme over the world's fast food. In celebration of this day, every holiday was replaced with Taco Day, which is on every Tuesday...

    • @SpaceCase132
      @SpaceCase132 6 років тому +33

      I honestly think it was a marketing war that caused every other franchise (except Taco Bell (or Pizza Hut, for international audiences)) to go bankrupt due to the excessive marketing, and many of the other smaller companies going bankrupt due to over-expansion. It may not be as exciting as a literal Franchise War, but it is slightly more believable.

    • @Ysckemia
      @Ysckemia 6 років тому +28

      i'll stick with SirMan McDude's scenario... for some reason XD

    • @SpaceCase132
      @SpaceCase132 6 років тому +8

      Fair enough.

    • @Mrkabrat
      @Mrkabrat 6 років тому +19

      What about the Taco Heresy Wars? Between those adherent to Taco Tuesday and the followers of Taco Friday

    • @SpaceCase132
      @SpaceCase132 6 років тому +16

      The Taco Heresy Wars were somewhat exaggerated by the media of San Angeles. In reality, they were simply small skirmishes before they joined forces in eradicating their common enemy of Del Taco.

  • @grandpagohan1
    @grandpagohan1 6 років тому +112

    According to Sly Stallone... Tamara was dead on the money.

  • @tristanhartup4936
    @tristanhartup4936 8 років тому +322

    "Christ, I woke up in Canada!" Why does that make me laugh so much?

    • @Magdra
      @Magdra 7 років тому

      Do you happen to be from Canada?

    • @LittleGoblinBastard
      @LittleGoblinBastard 7 років тому +6

      because it's coming true

    • @aaronbarlow4376
      @aaronbarlow4376 6 років тому

      True -Doh

    • @duckymomo7935
      @duckymomo7935 6 років тому

      i really liked this movie, it's my favorite right now

    • @amanibob1416
      @amanibob1416 6 років тому +4

      I'm Canadian and I'm sorry... Wait! That's a stereotype... Sorry!
      WAIT!!!

  • @Vyndora
    @Vyndora 9 місяців тому +51

    I want to go back to work yelling “MAN” to every guy I work with. 😂

  • @omanisat7266
    @omanisat7266 8 років тому +248

    "That's right, he had it made! Then he.... had his maid, and was all downhill from there."
    Zing.

  • @disobey5615
    @disobey5615 6 років тому +1511

    That moment wen you realize Demolition Man predicted the future

    • @HunterStiles651
      @HunterStiles651 5 років тому +30

      @ScentlessApprentice7 Necro, but I don't think this is what America would be like if Hilary won. I think just said what the SJWs wanted to hear to get elected and then once she was in the White House she would've done whatever the hell she wanted.

    • @sandernielsen8018
      @sandernielsen8018 5 років тому +28

      Just wondered if Demolition Man was one of those films that Kim Jong Il thought was documentaries ?

    • @SorchaSublime
      @SorchaSublime 5 років тому +23

      As someone who would probably qualify as an "sjw" by yalls standards saying that we want this movie to happen is like saying right wingers want total recalls version of mars.

    • @cavemancult1999
      @cavemancult1999 5 років тому +14

      I-Is this comment thread for real? Me reading this is more like the dystopian flick then reality, like bruv, leave the house for once

    • @SorchaSublime
      @SorchaSublime 5 років тому +4

      @@cavemancult1999 irk lol

  • @LittleMAC78
    @LittleMAC78 5 років тому +135

    Demolition Man is a satire masquerading as an action movie in a similar vein to the first Robocop movie or Paul Verhooven's other satire action piece "Starship Troopers".
    The gag about Schwarzenegger in the movie was repaid in Last Action Hero where Stallone was pictured as the Terminator.
    None of the films mentioned are the most subtle of satirical films which is why I always wondered why people struggled to see what they were.

    • @Tornado1994
      @Tornado1994 5 років тому +3

      Demolition Man WORKED. Last Action Hero Did NOT work.

    • @jasondyrkacz8270
      @jasondyrkacz8270 4 роки тому +6

      @@Tornado1994 Last Action Hero wasn't that bad though.

    • @HeleentheArcane
      @HeleentheArcane 4 роки тому +9

      @@jasondyrkacz8270 yeah, I really liked how it mocked the clichés of action movies.

    • @Tornado1994
      @Tornado1994 4 роки тому +1

      @@jasondyrkacz8270 LAH was boring,contrived,forced,convoluted and terrible. I HATED it and still do.

    • @neubro1448
      @neubro1448 4 роки тому +2

      Funny in Twins when Arnold walks by a Rambo poster.

  • @andresreydecastro
    @andresreydecastro 5 років тому +93

    The timeline of the future, as predicted by movies: Demolition Man, Mad Max, Judge Dredd, Starship Troopers.

    • @sophiam2095
      @sophiam2095 4 роки тому +2

      @TomeOfBattle Actually. given the Earth has recovered environmentally, that makes Judge Dread a little easier to enjoy. A lot easier actually.

    • @pterodactylx3100
      @pterodactylx3100 3 роки тому

      Do you know a site where we can download the whole film? Thanks

    • @elgusaniiiodeljuego6823
      @elgusaniiiodeljuego6823 Рік тому

      In that.order. Starship troopers is what happens when a pvssified, delusional and evil elite ruins the society and an authoritarian rule has to emerge in response to clean the mess and put everything back on track.

  • @wirelad2007
    @wirelad2007 8 років тому +152

    Sandra Bullock in the 90's...... what a hottie

    • @beastiebear7231
      @beastiebear7231 7 років тому +6

      Wire2904 she doesn't age either

    • @lemmythebulldog8812
      @lemmythebulldog8812 7 років тому +5

      Wire2904 sucks about her personality though, fuckin selfish ungrateful princess

    • @gedaman
      @gedaman 7 років тому +3

      She's a beauty for sure.

    • @STNeish
      @STNeish 7 років тому +4

      Indeed, she still is stunning.

    • @redbigun
      @redbigun 7 років тому +2

      She was adorable in this movie.

  • @kris220b
    @kris220b 7 років тому +179

    Wait a minute John Spartan.
    John... John 117.
    Spartan... spartan armor.

    • @neonknights
      @neonknights 6 років тому +20

      John Spartan = obvious
      Simon Phoenix = "reborn from the ashes"
      Lenina Huxley = "Brave New World" by Aldous Huxley, featuring a character named Lenina Crowne
      Raymond Cocteau = Jean Cocteau was a surrealist French poet / writer / filmmaker
      Edgar Friendly = obvious

    • @ninawilliams8
      @ninawilliams8 6 років тому +8

      What do you mean by John Spartan = obvious? I get that the other characters may have been based on other people but this movie came out way before Halo did.

    • @frozenlizard3370
      @frozenlizard3370 6 років тому

      Holy shit....

    • @randomguy2518
      @randomguy2518 6 років тому

      Literally just had that thought like 3 days ago

    • @DoomguyIsGrinningAtYou.
      @DoomguyIsGrinningAtYou. 5 років тому

      Hmm... It would make sense Master Chief would be inspired somewhat by old action movie heroes...
      Though he technically is a Doomguy rip off but I won't get into that.

  • @Tie-dyed-wisdom
    @Tie-dyed-wisdom 5 років тому +200

    Ironically Taco Bell is the only restaurant and there’s no toilet paper in this future

    • @redhood5894
      @redhood5894 4 роки тому

      Yeah.oh no

    • @timothywest7698
      @timothywest7698 4 роки тому +8

      There's the 3 SHELLS

    • @LucianDevine
      @LucianDevine 4 роки тому +2

      @@timothywest7698 How well do the 3 sea shells work with diarrhea?

    • @timothywest7698
      @timothywest7698 4 роки тому +2

      @@LucianDevine the world may never know

    • @MildTabascofries
      @MildTabascofries 4 роки тому

      This comment ages very well with the current toilet paper shortage

  • @thegameknight8916
    @thegameknight8916 4 роки тому +177

    As I said, there is an example of one of my favorite TV Tropes in this film, the trope in question being "Even Evil Has Standards."
    Simon Phoenix, in spite of how psychotic, sadistic, sociopathic and just plain evil he is, despises Cocteau _vehemently._
    From things like Cocteau's belief that free will is a pox to how he turned California into an overly sensitive, restrictive state, it is quite clear that if Simon Phoenix was able to, he'd *gladly* shoot the bastard dead himself.
    How I see it: Though Cocteau see's Simon as a justified means to his diabolic end, Simon Phoenix is at least straight about his villainous life. He wears it like a badge of pride. And he despises Cocteau because he's a lying, vile hypocrite who wants to squash free will and freedom of choice. As Simon Phoenix says: "You can't take away peoples rights to be assholes."

    • @thomastakesatollforthedark2231
      @thomastakesatollforthedark2231 2 роки тому +1

      People healthy, happy, and not hurting one another? Oh what a vile hypocrite

    • @thomastakesatollforthedark2231
      @thomastakesatollforthedark2231 2 роки тому +1

      @@ichijofestival2576 yes. That's my point

    • @thomastakesatollforthedark2231
      @thomastakesatollforthedark2231 2 роки тому

      @@ichijofestival2576 also, does your first message not appear for you?

    • @ZombieWilfred
      @ZombieWilfred 2 роки тому

      @@thomastakesatollforthedark2231 The Scraps are people, too... People whom Cocteau would happily murder for not wanting to live under his regime. So yeah, he is indeed a vile hypocrite...

    • @jeancaron9325
      @jeancaron9325 Рік тому +1

      @@thomastakesatollforthedark2231 People Just give-up their Free Will and Accepted their Slavery,Are YOU Willing to Do this.

  • @grummanf-14tomcat8
    @grummanf-14tomcat8 6 років тому +33

    "I love you!"
    "I was frozen toda-!"
    Dying!

  • @coalcreekdefense8106
    @coalcreekdefense8106 4 роки тому +132

    I know everyone's been making "welcome to current year" jokes ever since this came out, but it's really never been funnier than spring of 2020. We're literally afraid to touch each other and nobody has toilet paper. It's perfect!

    • @MrMovieRecaps
      @MrMovieRecaps 4 роки тому +6

      Coal Creek Defense who would have thought it would age so well and be a prediction of our current situation! Show me how the 3 sea shells work and we are sorted lol

    • @joeycoe85
      @joeycoe85 Рік тому

      Also, DEATH STRANDING. A world where people are completely shut off from each other, and reliant on DELIVERY DRIVERS to survive! It actually released just a few months BEFORE the pandemic hit.

  • @Mikoyo15
    @Mikoyo15 8 років тому +828

    if they made things that are bad for you illegal......why do they have taco bell?

    • @zeitgeistindustries1792
      @zeitgeistindustries1792 8 років тому +35

      OHOOOOO SNAP SHOTS FIRED!!!

    • @jacksparrowismydaddy
      @jacksparrowismydaddy 8 років тому +79

      because they survived the franchise war. the pope probably takes bribes from them too.

    • @shudowwolf3256
      @shudowwolf3256 8 років тому +33

      The ultimate paradox...

    • @kyo2975
      @kyo2975 8 років тому +49

      I think since Taco Bell was the remaining franchise, it was made to conform to the laws of better eating.

    • @fredlburrows
      @fredlburrows 8 років тому +10

      I remember when I saw this at 10 I thought the franchise wars were a real "war" war, with killing lol.

  • @ZELYNER
    @ZELYNER 4 роки тому +52

    Congratulations, In Cyberpunk 2077, protagonists toilet is equipped with 3 seashells and no toilet paper... the legend lives on

    • @spittinvenom9671
      @spittinvenom9671 3 роки тому +1

      🐚🐚🐚

    • @zienwolf
      @zienwolf 3 роки тому +5

      You're gonna need the 3 seashells to clean up that mess of a game.

  • @ECL28E
    @ECL28E 6 років тому +72

    Funny thing. Sandra Bullock's character was originally meant to be Stallone's daughter, all grown-up.

    • @brianbrush5107
      @brianbrush5107 5 років тому +14

      That would have been an interesting twist

    • @editating_2614
      @editating_2614 5 років тому +12

      @@brianbrush5107 Oldboy

    • @razatronidiotics9430
      @razatronidiotics9430 3 роки тому +3

      Wow messed up now that we think of it

    • @danielanderson8322
      @danielanderson8322 3 роки тому +3

      "What do Demolition Man and Star Wars have in common?"
      "I'd rather not think about it."
      "A Black supervillain connected to the hero's past."
      🙄🙄🙄 Oh!

  • @boredstudent
    @boredstudent 7 років тому +53

    I love this movie. it's funny, stupid and cool at the same time. I believe my favorite line was "we're police officers. we're not trained to handle this kind of violence"

  • @jesscerabm
    @jesscerabm 7 років тому +111

    I'm with the critic on this one. I want to see a franchise war movie because that just looks freaking awesome and hilarious!

    • @emilykruger2844
      @emilykruger2844 6 років тому +3

      J BarronMiller The Taco Bell commercial of Nacho Fries was based on the franchise wars from Demolition Man

  • @TaliaIGhul
    @TaliaIGhul 4 роки тому +185

    Raymond Cocteau = SJWs
    Simon Phoenix = Internet Trolls
    John Spartan = Everyone Else

    • @gato23
      @gato23 4 роки тому +8

      Edgar Friendly = Everyone Else
      Spartan is the Government.

    • @habijjj
      @habijjj 4 роки тому +7

      The best part is that even Simon Phoenix thinks cocteau is evil as shit at worst Phoenix wanted the freedom to do what he pleased even if it was bad

    • @takuansoho5836
      @takuansoho5836 4 роки тому +3

      "- Be well !"
      "- Be fucked !"

    • @irishdc9523
      @irishdc9523 4 роки тому +6

      More like Cocteau= SJWs
      Friendly = internet trolls
      Phoenix = actual criminals
      Spartan everyone else

  • @hfactor66
    @hfactor66 7 років тому +61

    A future where Taco Bell is the only restaurant? Fuck that!

    • @laslocurasdeemily4941
      @laslocurasdeemily4941 7 років тому

      hfactor66 diarrhea all over the bathrooms

    • @milkywayflea404
      @milkywayflea404 7 років тому

      As the great Filthy Frank once said, "It's just Taco Bell, what could possibly go wrong?"

    • @redbigun
      @redbigun 7 років тому

      That's so fake. Everyone knows Disney will own everything in 20 years.

  • @soomiesoom
    @soomiesoom 9 років тому +91

    and ironically years later, Schwarzenegger became the governor of california

    • @NekoSoren
      @NekoSoren 9 років тому +12

      Yet all of us wonder what it would have been if he became president

    • @jareththegoblinking3191
      @jareththegoblinking3191 8 років тому +1

      I wouldn't trust a cyborg running that state

    • @tygonmaster
      @tygonmaster 7 років тому +15

      +Kaagh178 I can already hear his re-election slogan. "I'LL BE BACK!"

  • @kommo1
    @kommo1 8 років тому +193

    I always thought, that the sea shells were just fancy buttons. You know, for those fancy ass showers. One button for cleaning, one for desinfecting and the last for drying.

    • @GLIEPNIR
      @GLIEPNIR 8 років тому +13

      O.O that...does make some sort of sense...

    • @Gojiragon
      @Gojiragon 8 років тому +8

      FINALLY, SOMEONE EXPLAINED IT TO ME! GOD, THANK YOU!!

    • @lillianacrouch3461
      @lillianacrouch3461 8 років тому +3

      No, our 1st sea shells use miniature vibrating ultrasounds that cause the "stuff" to loosen off the cheeks. The secondary plays vibrant music that causes relaxation in the intestines allowing ease in the bowel movements, the third uses a miniature molecular ray that fries and transports what is left to the nearest bio recycling plant for power or farmers. We in the future have video plans for children birthed in our Children's Development Facility about the three sea shells.

    • @ergotempusvernum
      @ergotempusvernum 8 років тому

      Same here. I thought they were button/levers that operated a bidet with each controlling the strength of the spray since that seemed like the most logical conclusion.

    • @Draukagrissah
      @Draukagrissah 8 років тому +2

      >stuff
      Poooop.

  • @northstar6920
    @northstar6920 5 років тому +24

    "I've seen the future, you know what it is it's a 47-year-old virgin sitting around is his face pajama's drinking a banana broccoli shake singing I'm an Oscar Mayer wiener" - A Friendly guy

  • @sandroedilashvili3651
    @sandroedilashvili3651 8 років тому +178

    But he didn't say 'Would you kindly' " :D

  • @miccmike9356
    @miccmike9356 8 років тому +398

    Breaking the law.
    LAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAWWWWWWWWWWWGH

  • @charleswoodsongoat1258
    @charleswoodsongoat1258 8 років тому +177

    I've never seen this movie but it looks fucking brilliant

    • @gedaman
      @gedaman 7 років тому +11

      Charles WoodsonGOAT It really is a gem from the 1990s, a lot like how great Hard Target is from 1993.

    • @Nyerguds
      @Nyerguds 7 років тому +8

      I saw it recently. I thought it was genius. The whole Noodle-Incident-like seashells joke was so silly, and him cursing to get the fine-distributor to dispense "toilet paper" was hilarious.

    • @Onsvaltti
      @Onsvaltti 7 років тому +2

      You need to watch it, it still is amazing movie!

    • @theycallmedrp
      @theycallmedrp 6 років тому +1

      Charles WoodsonGOAT Oh, this movie is great. Watched it a hundred times.

    • @orlanzo2621
      @orlanzo2621 6 років тому +2

      It was honestly my favorite movie as a kid for the longest back in the day. I still watch it every so often. Lol.

  • @nova2512
    @nova2512 5 років тому +47

    20:43 *Catched isn’t a word. You were looking for the word caught*

  • @jeremybarker5510
    @jeremybarker5510 8 років тому +67

    You know what? This movie is actually pretty good. I know nostalgia critic reviews bad movies, but this is an exception. Demolition Man is really good.

    • @jeremybarker5510
      @jeremybarker5510 8 років тому +5

      That's true, but that's what makes it enjoyable. The action does appear silly, the lines are weird, the acting is over the top, but this movie is one of my favorite fun movies.

    • @MatheusSM1000
      @MatheusSM1000 8 років тому +7

      He doesn't ALWAYS review bad movies, he sometimes review movies that are good (or that he likes) just because there's something funny to be said about the movie. Just like when he reviewed Blade or Commando.

    • @shelliblossom8953
      @shelliblossom8953 7 років тому

      He reviews moives we request good or bad

  • @jakeohalloran952
    @jakeohalloran952 7 років тому +176

    The franchise wars are the comments section of UA-cam on every video about DC and marvel.

    • @Roost-xr3lc
      @Roost-xr3lc 6 років тому

      Hannibal Lovecraft true.

    • @jamesdalebozeman
      @jamesdalebozeman 6 років тому

      I was thinking something more along the lines of the events of the Perfect Dark game-series.

    • @nikopteros1659
      @nikopteros1659 6 років тому

      or the fanboys of sony or microsoft... or mario vs sonic...... or goku vs superman..... or pizza vs hamburgers.... or tits vs ass...... or missionary vs I WILL STOP NOW.

  • @KodiakCaptures
    @KodiakCaptures 8 років тому +221

    "PHOENIX!"

  • @ShooterQ
    @ShooterQ 5 років тому +30

    Didn't even cover my favorite line...
    "Give me a gun. Give me TWO guns."

  • @K4p4o
    @K4p4o 7 років тому +109

    Denis Leary as the leader of the resistance is brilliant casting. Of course he would be the leader of the 4chan to their tumblr.

    • @redbigun
      @redbigun 6 років тому +11

      That monologue is one of the greatest things I've seen in a film.

    • @jacksparrowismydaddy
      @jacksparrowismydaddy 6 років тому +6

      and he's really sold me on buckets of cheese

  • @metallord6960
    @metallord6960 7 років тому +62

    a future where soda beer smoking and mexican food is illegal, this is a horror movie

    • @nicktechnubyte1184
      @nicktechnubyte1184 7 років тому +8

      Yoshi Zuckerman the sad thing is this is what a lot of sjw wannabes want to happen!

    • @lortep458
      @lortep458 6 років тому +5

      Nick, i dont think you understood this movie.

    • @nikopteros1659
      @nikopteros1659 6 років тому

      Soda? well Juice exists so its fine. Beer? meh sure i'm not too much of a fan anyways. Smoking? hell yeah fuck that shit. Mexican food? GET THAT AWAY FROM ME IF YOU WANT TO DIE

    • @Evilmonkey7270
      @Evilmonkey7270 6 років тому +1

      Soda beer smoking? I didn't even know that was a thing!

  • @carmelofeliciano7915
    @carmelofeliciano7915 4 роки тому +61

    Did Huxley predicted covid-19 when she was telling spartan about all the diceases that made it illegal to touch other people?

    • @TheKilroyman
      @TheKilroyman 4 роки тому +5

      There are diseases far worse than corona that would fit that category; think about it.

    • @GoatPopsicle
      @GoatPopsicle 4 роки тому +3

      I would blame the boomers. The over-65ers who were already spreading an epidemic of STIs since at least 2010; and now corona is killing them at rates way higher than anyone else

  • @miroxcubeyotp2175
    @miroxcubeyotp2175 6 років тому +581

    "My god, a future where everyone is sensitive, can't take a joke, and obsessed with the past? It's a future run by Tumblr!".
    No, it's the present.

    • @UnknownUnknown-mo7zg
      @UnknownUnknown-mo7zg 6 років тому +20

      At least we won't have the Nazis and KKK calling black people the N word.

    • @rosehearttoxic1691
      @rosehearttoxic1691 6 років тому +5

      He was talking about the movies future, the movie was made back in 1996

    • @maxwelsh6121
      @maxwelsh6121 6 років тому +13

      @@rosehearttoxic1691 actually , it was set in the futurist nihilist year 1996
      It was made in 1993- 'when we still had time to change'

    • @winterweasel425
      @winterweasel425 6 років тому +7

      yeah insted were gonna call whites craquers.

    • @canadianmegatron9398
      @canadianmegatron9398 6 років тому +12

      So yeah a future ran by tumblr

  • @andrewvasquez6572
    @andrewvasquez6572 6 років тому +72

    What if this was a prequel to judge dredd

  • @Will-nq3fo
    @Will-nq3fo 8 років тому +39

    3 sea shells, they are actually just covering 3 buttons, one you push to flush number 1, one you push to flush number 2 and one you push to get a baday (spell?) spray wash. my theory when I was young anyway

    • @hoppyman11
      @hoppyman11 7 років тому +13

      Will J. That...Actually makes a whole lot of sense. Damn.

    • @richardsanchez9190
      @richardsanchez9190 7 років тому +4

      that's the most plausible thing ive ever heard

    • @sterlingmuse5808
      @sterlingmuse5808 7 років тому +3

      I-am Awesomeness All of that kinda gets thrown out when you remember that there is still a toilet bowl there. The only thing the seashells replaced was toilet PAPER; if they acted as you said, the bowl would be superfluous.

    • @cookiemocher388
      @cookiemocher388 7 років тому +4

      Sterling Muse again, it's a future run by Tumblr, they're crazy enough to think of something that needlessly complicated, maybe the toilets are stronger at flushing in the future considering the possibility that more people could have been using "flushable" wipes then maybe moved to seashells

  • @robertflores6927
    @robertflores6927 5 років тому +24

    LMAO. I've watched this several since it's come out. Just now realized it.. "HE DIDN'T PAY HIS TAXES!"

  • @OMEGATHENIETZCHIAN
    @OMEGATHENIETZCHIAN 8 років тому +172

    I always thought the three sea shells were buttons to activiate a bidet, wipe and air drier.

    • @neildivins2844
      @neildivins2844 8 років тому +9

      I think you grab 2 of the seashells and grab the third with the seashells and use the third as a shit-scoop

    • @orlock20
      @orlock20 8 років тому +15

      Water, air and flush.

    • @Team_BaM
      @Team_BaM 8 років тому +4

      I always thought when you put them together they created a tiny laser that only destroys poo. :p
      No, but seriously. When I heard what a bidet was years after seeing the movie my first thought was "Oh that's what the three seashells were."

    • @BirdRaiserE
      @BirdRaiserE 8 років тому +4

      I thought it was rough (for when you've just started cleaning), fine (for getting what's left) and buttplug (for extra good cleaning).

    • @Achillez098
      @Achillez098 8 років тому +10

      HOLY SHIT, that is probably the best theory I have heard yet.
      Thank you good sir, I have finally discovered the most likely explanation for the 3 seashells (and I am not even kidding), my life is now complete

  • @NOCTURNUSFILM
    @NOCTURNUSFILM 7 років тому +223

    Fun fact: In Germany they dubbed "Taco Bell" with "Pizza Hut", because there are no "Taco Bells" in Germany. Which makes no sense because you can still read "Taco Bell" in the film multiple times. And I'm not sure they got money from "Pizza Hut" for that change...
    Still: Awesome movie!

    • @Appleseed66
      @Appleseed66 7 років тому +10

      Dubbing is the most stupid thing you can do to a movie.

    • @NOCTURNUSFILM
      @NOCTURNUSFILM 7 років тому +3

      +Nintendofan1998 Oh, that's possible. I don't know.

    • @derGhebbet
      @derGhebbet 7 років тому +2

      Appleseed66 You are 100% correct... it's much better to make shitty remakes of great foreign movies. /s

    • @Appleseed66
      @Appleseed66 7 років тому +6

      That's no alternative. Everybody who is able to read should be able to read subtitles. You don't have to re-make every movie for every language in the world...!

    • @barkingbeaglebanana9512
      @barkingbeaglebanana9512 7 років тому

      +Appleseed66 Haha! Reading is for pussies!

  • @cuppajoe2006
    @cuppajoe2006 6 років тому +70

    In the international version, Taco Bell was replaced by Pizza Hut, as sit was thought that PH was more internationally known. All Taco Bell logos were digitally replaced by the Hut.

    • @b3rz3rk3r9
      @b3rz3rk3r9 6 років тому +6

      Why did we get stuck with Tex-Mex Fast Food in our version, instead of near-good pizza, salad and breadsticks with soda?

    • @ShawnSandiego
      @ShawnSandiego 5 років тому +7

      Internationally speaking this made total sense. I've never encountered a Taco Bell anywhere in Europe, but found Pizza Huts in every country I've been to.

    • @Jalaxy_Pro
      @Jalaxy_Pro 5 років тому +1

      Ik this was a year ago, but I saw the Pizza Hut version, and I realized that there is one part where they forgot to replace it, which was on the logos on the door of the resturant

    • @ianashby1449
      @ianashby1449 5 років тому

      I have the Pizza Hut version of the dvd

    • @chefboiarby304
      @chefboiarby304 5 років тому +1

      I was surprised when the guy said Taco Bell expecting him to say Pizza Hut during the review.

  • @jp3813
    @jp3813 5 років тому +24

    13:39 is another prediction made by this movie even though it was a joke. In 2017, the REACT channel uploaded a video titled "Do College Kids Know 80s Action Movies?", in which people are shown posters w/ the titles removed. One of the reactors then said the following about The Terminator: "What? This is Arnold Schwarzenegger..... the governor. I don't know this movie, and I didn't know he acted." Let that sink in for a moment.

    • @tomf3150
      @tomf3150 4 роки тому +2

      Bttf Reagan

    • @shaider1982
      @shaider1982 3 роки тому +2

      Sort of what happened to Reagan in BTTF & The Philadelphia Experiement.

    • @jp3813
      @jp3813 3 роки тому +1

      @@tomf3150 Reagan's fame as an actor wasn't as big as Arnold's.

    • @jp3813
      @jp3813 3 роки тому

      @@shaider1982 Except Arnold was an iconic action star before going into politics.

    • @bt3743
      @bt3743 3 роки тому

      @@jp3813 and he made like 3 good films and everything else was trash

  • @donkeyman9992
    @donkeyman9992 7 років тому +90

    I just love the hilarity of the situation. A thug like Phoenix is only dangerous because the cops of the future are powerless to defend themselves.

    • @crackerjack0349
      @crackerjack0349 6 років тому +3

      So 2018

    • @b3rz3rk3r9
      @b3rz3rk3r9 5 років тому +9

      Boy, if that's not a Pro-Gun message, I don't know what is.

    • @loganshaw4527
      @loganshaw4527 2 роки тому

      The LA shooting had odd parallels there.

  • @Fermion.
    @Fermion. 5 років тому +21

    Shoutout to whoever created that beautiful modern art masterpiece at 13:29. I agree Doug, this movie NEEDS to happen ASAP.
    Staying true to the awesomely cheesy '90's lines:
    *The Franchise Wars*
    _Meat Your Maker_

  • @MrPalhomPlays
    @MrPalhomPlays 7 років тому +55

    The Franchise War = Foodfight

  • @cavemancult1999
    @cavemancult1999 5 років тому +16

    Some dude: What seems to be your boggle? :)))
    Phoenix: My boggle? *looks disgusted, still looking disgusted*
    His mind: Christ I woke up in Canada
    Hands down the funniest bit of the movie

  • @14DAVEYO
    @14DAVEYO 6 років тому +36

    Demolition Man is one of my favorites I remember being 11 years old seeing this movie theater. Watching it now at 33 years old and a big comic book fan this is totally Batman and Robin remixed. Wesley Snipes in my opinion plays "the Joker"better than anyone ever has watch this movie and you'll see what I mean. Stallone is like a more hardcore "Batman" haha and even Bullock is like "robin"

  • @HorrorFan86
    @HorrorFan86 8 років тому +333

    rob schnider: HE DOESN'T KNOW HOW TO USE THE THREE SEASHELLS
    Me: NO DUH HE WAS JUST THAWED OUT SO HE WOULDN'T KNOW HOW TO USE IT

    • @jacksparrowismydaddy
      @jacksparrowismydaddy 8 років тому +24

      I'm thinking they are buttons to have jets of water clean your ass.

    • @Bobbo63
      @Bobbo63 8 років тому +1

      so... what happens when you push all 3?

    • @HorrorFan86
      @HorrorFan86 8 років тому +9

      +Bobby Fletcher DISASTERS

    • @jacksparrowismydaddy
      @jacksparrowismydaddy 8 років тому +3

      Bobby Fletcher I dunno but I hope it gets invented soon cause I wanna find out.

    • @orlock20
      @orlock20 8 років тому +3

      www.eurweb.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/04/beyonce-lemonade-water-doors.jpg

  • @wolfpax181
    @wolfpax181 8 років тому +54

    Hey! We can totally take a joke! Now take that back or I'll spin the wheel of Internet threats.

    • @minecraftninja1622
      @minecraftninja1622 8 років тому +1

      9

    • @wolfpax181
      @wolfpax181 8 років тому +7

      the gaming ninja
      Tick tick tick...
      Awww, lazy racial slur comment. If you had spun the wheel slightly harder you might have gotten politically charged insult that leads to a massive hate filled thread for you to wallow in.

    • @minecraftninja1622
      @minecraftninja1622 8 років тому

      damn.

    • @thesupremenecroticdakimakura
      @thesupremenecroticdakimakura 8 років тому +7

      I'll have two spins.

  • @yetiornot5726
    @yetiornot5726 4 роки тому +31

    "Nothing spicy"?? I've got a bottle of Carolina Reaper sauce in my fridge and I'll clutch it til death like an Alabaman and their AR-15!

    • @GoatPopsicle
      @GoatPopsicle 4 роки тому

      Just wait until your health insurance won’t cover you, because hot sauce has been linked to intestinal inflammation(a known precursor to many diseases and syndromes), and that’s a preexisting condition.

    • @nhmooytis7058
      @nhmooytis7058 4 роки тому

      I looove Culleys Carolina Reaper Sauce!

    • @nhmooytis7058
      @nhmooytis7058 4 роки тому +1

      @@GoatPopsicle Bull, I’ve eaten spicy food for years and am healthy as a horse.

    • @GoatPopsicle
      @GoatPopsicle 4 роки тому

      @@nhmooytis7058 Being healthy all these years while eating spicey food has nothing to do with it, for health/life insurance companies. Once they find a way out of covering you because of what they deem “a previously non-disclosed, high risk behaviour, that *could* have contributed to your claim”; you are fully and truly screwed.

    • @nhmooytis7058
      @nhmooytis7058 4 роки тому +1

      @@GoatPopsicle oh BS. How are they going to find out I ate chilli peppers? Analyze my crap? And since when is eating spicy food been high risk behavior? Mexicans, Asians, Indians, all do. Grow up and grow a pair.

  • @pacmon1467
    @pacmon1467 6 років тому +194

    Wesley snipes would be a good joker

    • @b3rz3rk3r9
      @b3rz3rk3r9 6 років тому +9

      If going with black actors, I'd rather go with LaKeith Stanfield.

    • @spikeytang686
      @spikeytang686 5 років тому +10

      Holy shit, you're right!!

    • @regiman222
      @regiman222 5 років тому +5

      With characters getting race or gender changed so often these days he might be the next one

    • @igotnogems5834
      @igotnogems5834 5 років тому +4

      A ripped joker too

    • @theitfactorjameswheezer2852
      @theitfactorjameswheezer2852 4 роки тому

      Domagoj Mamić hes still in shape though. Unlike Steven Seagal......yuck

  • @CheshireCatNY
    @CheshireCatNY 6 років тому +16

    “Could’ve sneaked around” and “Could’ve catched him” made my brain hurt.

  • @sentinelvortex8433
    @sentinelvortex8433 6 років тому +15

    “It’s like a domino set you don’t fully knock down... NEXT TO A BOMB!”
    That escalated quickly

  • @gamesmaster0459
    @gamesmaster0459 5 років тому +20

    "I'm sorry to say that the world has changed to a sad Brady Bunch version of itself"... Truer words have never been spoken

    • @Tornado1994
      @Tornado1994 5 років тому +1

      Actually its "I'm Sorry to Say, that world has become a Pussy Whipped Brady Bunch Version of itself. Run by a buncha robed sissies."

  • @DemonBoy3223
    @DemonBoy3223 8 років тому +42

    Ah yes, the _Last_ _Airbender_ Disaster of 2010. As one of the many lucky survivors, I still get nightmares about that day. A lot of people died. How many didn't have to?

    • @anirudhviswanathan3986
      @anirudhviswanathan3986 7 років тому +6

      George Bean
      No one had to. I saw it for 5 minutes and never look at it ever again. The PAIN!!! THE AGONYYYYT!!!

    • @DemonBoy3223
      @DemonBoy3223 7 років тому +5

      You dodged a bullet, the trauma would've been much, much worse.

    • @loganshaw4527
      @loganshaw4527 2 роки тому +1

      And that movie was only a 3rd of the story imagine how bad the Trilogy would have been.

  • @Shaymin0
    @Shaymin0 7 років тому +22

    That ending skit... perfection...

  • @sebthompson8559
    @sebthompson8559 7 років тому +62

    Happy 1 million subscribers doug

  • @drewyetti
    @drewyetti Рік тому +7

    “Look, you can’t take away people’s right to be assholes.” An underrated quote that brings up a very good point as that’s what Cocteau as he plans to make slaves out of everyone under his utopia.

  • @jellysquid8077
    @jellysquid8077 7 років тому +273

    *Stalone voice* PENIIIISSSS!!

  • @Rikard_Nilsson
    @Rikard_Nilsson 6 років тому +70

    Forget the seashells. The most perplexing thing about this movie is how the future bad guy defrosts a psychotic mass murderer just to kill what equates to a graffiti-painting vandal. That's like putting a cobra in your garden to kill a gopher.

    • @TheStapleGunKid
      @TheStapleGunKid 6 років тому +30

      You seem to be missing the point. The point the movie is that society is so pacified and timid that the cops are now totally helpless against even a minor petty criminal like Edgar Friendly. And of course the leader is so determined to build the perfect society that he regards even minor threats to his plan as major issues that require dramatic solutions.

    • @Rikard_Nilsson
      @Rikard_Nilsson 6 років тому +6

      No I get it, I just find it to be a incredibly unlikely contrivance, nobody would be that stupid I don't care how meek their society is, he should be able to see from his records that "hey this guy might just be over the frickin top"

    • @fishbot9902
      @fishbot9902 6 років тому +1

      it is like putting a chicken into a vegi garden to deal with a single snail

    • @b3rz3rk3r9
      @b3rz3rk3r9 6 років тому

      King or normal?

    • @InoMercy
      @InoMercy 4 роки тому +3

      @@Rikard_Nilsson It's amusing you have that much faith in human intelligence.

  • @powegger2
    @powegger2 8 років тому +50

    to clarify the three seashells are buttons on a combination toilet bidet. one rinses one flushes one dries. the reference was made to confuse americans because we simply never use bidets and to my knowledge there is not one that combines both currently but in a future world where water reduction and recycling is in high demand it makes perfect sense to combine the two.

    • @WR3ND
      @WR3ND 8 років тому +2

      Hmm... Crocodile Dundee: "It's for washing your backside, right?" Seems legit.

    • @VIIStar
      @VIIStar 8 років тому

      Yeah I just assumed they were fancy buttons for a bidet - or like the controls on a japanese toilet

    • @Tiberius11111111
      @Tiberius11111111 8 років тому +6

      so basicly it's japan toilet then huh that simple

    •  8 років тому +2

      Thank you for clarifying this I was confused.

  • @_12k70
    @_12k70 3 роки тому +10

    Holy fuck, this is one of those movies that just...KEEPS. GETTING. MORE. RELEVANT. Like, does whoever made it saw into the future how the internet landscape would be?

  • @MrQuickshot117
    @MrQuickshot117 5 років тому +19

    You know I always thought the seashells were buttons and the toilets were actually made in Japan.

  • @briantolley1100
    @briantolley1100 9 років тому +76

    Seriously, how the FUCK do the 3 seashells work??

    • @andersevenrud
      @andersevenrud 9 років тому +34

      Brian Tolley Daniel Waters said: "I won't tell you the actual secret, but I'll tell you where it came from. There's a scene where Stallone has to use a restroom. I'm trying to come up with futuristic things you'd find in there. I was having trouble, so I called my buddy, another screenwriter across town, asked him if he had any ideas. Ironically enough that guy was taking a dump when he answered the phone, looked around his bathroom and said 'I have a bag of seashells on my toilet as a decoration?' I said 'Ok, I'll make something out of that.".... and that explains nothing. Goddamnit!

    • @XenoSpyro
      @XenoSpyro 9 років тому +35

      Brian Tolley I believe the whole thing is a joke, that or the seashells are just buttons for water spray control like Japanese toilets. If the seashells were supposedly used to manually grab shit from your ass, it would be inefficent beyond belief and insanitary as fuck - which I'm fairly certain would qualify as "something bad" in this crazy universe.

    • @КонстантинЕремеев-у5д
      @КонстантинЕремеев-у5д 9 років тому

      Brian Tolley 3 seashells is buttons to control bidet\toilet

    • @dude464
      @dude464 9 років тому +1

      XenoSpyro that makes a lot of sense

    • @Matt561
      @Matt561 9 років тому +1

      Brian Tolley I imagine one is butt washer one is but dryer and one is a lady wand

  • @sperrin
    @sperrin 8 років тому +25

    "Could've catched him."
    She also could have taught NC basic English...

    • @Lars0n
      @Lars0n 7 років тому +3

      I was starting to think no one commented on it.

    • @micdrop344
      @micdrop344 7 років тому

      Steve Perrin I was going to say something, but I see I'm 8 months too late

  • @evolv.e
    @evolv.e Рік тому +5

    I had this movie on Laserdisc.
    Imagine the added joy I get when Huxley exclaims “you’re even better in real life than Laserdisc”.
    The circle is complete.

  • @BenCol
    @BenCol 8 років тому +24

    5:28 "Huxley" - do you get it? Because he wrote about a future world too!

    • @malis9045
      @malis9045 7 років тому +2

      And his work also depicts a Utopian society, that put human joy over everything, but by doing this actually create a system, that is an enemy to men

  • @seanmurphy3430
    @seanmurphy3430 8 років тому +106

    Wait, Malcolm "outlawed all crime"? Isn't that a tautology, i.e. something being outlawed and something being a crime are definitionally the same? Is that the joke?

    • @Legendary_Detective-Wobbuffet
      @Legendary_Detective-Wobbuffet 8 років тому +7

      he found the ballence, he just doesn't remember what it was.

    • @joshstone4685
      @joshstone4685 8 років тому

      no

    • @GamesFromSpace
      @GamesFromSpace 8 років тому +2

      If you have to ask "was that the joke?", you're an idiot.

    • @seanmurphy3430
      @seanmurphy3430 8 років тому +1

      Joshua Pearce
      Or it wasn't a very good joke. This is what I'm trying to figure out.

    • @DM_Dad
      @DM_Dad 8 років тому +2

      tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/DontExplainTheJoke

  • @Team_BaM
    @Team_BaM 8 років тому +23

    Stallone can't break the law, he is the law!

  • @TheMsLourdes
    @TheMsLourdes Рік тому +3

    OK, the three seashells is straightforward. They are controls for the Bidet. One Spritzes the back, the other the front with less pressure, and the third activates the dryer in the seat.
    The fact that this is still a question *even after Sandra Bullock said as much in an article* is beyond me.

  • @icydrag
    @icydrag 8 років тому +27

    Kinda disappointed he didn't go with Wo-MEH-YAN! for Sigourney Weaver's.

    • @noahfortner2
      @noahfortner2 7 років тому +2

      tchae G I think that was part of the joke

  • @musicvideos445
    @musicvideos445 6 років тому +25

    20:43 Really? "Catched"? REALLY?

  • @comidyseeker
    @comidyseeker 8 років тому +12

    I love that even though Critic is a casual gamer who focuses on movies, even he knows the famous, all-powerful, Bioshock phrase.

  • @DoctorProph3t
    @DoctorProph3t 4 роки тому +8

    “Fuck you, Lady!” Forever best line in cinematic history.

  • @IHaveWaffles
    @IHaveWaffles 6 років тому +13

    Why is this the review I keep coming back to and watching again and again?

    • @gingaddict
      @gingaddict 4 роки тому +1

      I keep coming back because I can't get enough of Stallone saying 'PHOENIX!'
      Or 'PENIS!'