Why am I suddenly missing my ex?

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  • Опубліковано 5 вер 2024
  • UA-cam subscriber Luke writes, “Hi Susan, I was wondering if you could possibly address why we may suddenly miss an ex out of nowhere, especially after it seemed like we’ve been doing so well for so long in moving on from them. It’s a very confusing and defeating feeling, and I’m hoping you may have some insight to help reconcile these feelings. Thank you so much for everything that you do! You’ve already helped me immensely.”
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КОМЕНТАРІ • 481

  • @Lanes8930
    @Lanes8930 Рік тому +141

    Time heals everything. I haven't thought about my ex for a whole 10 seconds.

  • @NoName-ny1bt
    @NoName-ny1bt 4 роки тому +607

    Time heals everything. I haven’t thought about my ex for the past 5 years and tonight I couldn’t stop thinking about her

    • @abramsscott2926
      @abramsscott2926 3 роки тому +13

      Get your Ex back in less than 24 hours

    • @roullira609
      @roullira609 3 роки тому +79

      That happened to me today, just weird right?

    • @Alwayslearnimg
      @Alwayslearnimg 3 роки тому +50

      @@roullira609 Me too. Time does not heal everything. Had not thought about her very often and then this past week or so it’s just hit me. And we’ve been apart for years. I don’t even know for sure how to get in touch with her if I wanted to reach out.

    • @olahuuber5540
      @olahuuber5540 3 роки тому +17

      @@abramsscott2926 even if we get back things won't be as good as they used to be so if you can help me with growing up 🙏 namastey

    • @hwdareu5848
      @hwdareu5848 3 роки тому +18

      @@Alwayslearnimg don't reach out if she broke up with you.

  • @a.d.b535
    @a.d.b535 5 років тому +399

    My logic is very simple: just as I am getting through it today, I will get through it in the future

    • @zheyuezhao456
      @zheyuezhao456 5 років тому +4

      It kinda have a different feel to it after a year

    • @nicolelauderdale3919
      @nicolelauderdale3919 4 роки тому +1

      A.D. B and how is this going a year later ? I am struggling at 6 months and I broke up with him . His only issue which became a major one was his addiction. So - difficult to end and give up on someone

    • @barnesryan24
      @barnesryan24 4 роки тому +2

      This is a time I deal with 18 months back to normal then all sudden reoccurring feelings, memories and emotions. Some are intense which makes process difficult.

    • @samsar9118
      @samsar9118 4 роки тому +1

      amen: ), god bless you, this quote really helped me. thank you: )

    • @a.d.b535
      @a.d.b535 4 роки тому +1

      @@samsar9118 You're welcome. Though we cannot now see the sun light over a rain cloud, it's still there.

  • @spikeyconstantine
    @spikeyconstantine 4 роки тому +236

    This is so sad.. I miss my first love even after 12 years all of a sudden. It's getting intense nowadays but I didn’t even feel this sad when we separated

    • @NjongDD
      @NjongDD 4 роки тому +6

      XHera stay strong

    • @eileenyoung6959
      @eileenyoung6959 4 роки тому +29

      Be gentle on yourself.
      Some people will always have a special spot in your heart.
      Wish them all the best but you need to move one.
      Take care.🙂

    • @sametoyoutoo8509
      @sametoyoutoo8509 3 роки тому +25

      Same here, 12 years. It is driving me crazy. I hate it I want him to leave my head forever and ever.

    • @hwdareu5848
      @hwdareu5848 3 роки тому +2

      @@sametoyoutoo8509 who broke up who?

    • @nechaniamatroos6543
      @nechaniamatroos6543 2 роки тому +2

      That's me it's so bad I'm so so lost like I'm not even thinking about the bad that he did like I just miss him dearly and there is nothing I can do about this it's been everyday now

  • @annikaroe9471
    @annikaroe9471 9 місяців тому +30

    I think I haven’t felt truely loved and accepted in so long, I keep reflecting on a time where I once was. Then I reflect on how awful my other relationships were after that one and I get intense feelings of regret. I look at old notes from him and I can hardly believe that something like that happened to me. I just want to feel those things again.

    • @kenziecarswell4509
      @kenziecarswell4509 3 місяці тому +2

      I'm exactly where you are right now. I'm so sorry you felt like this too.

  • @Idkaboutyou444
    @Idkaboutyou444 3 роки тому +82

    I feel so alone that I start thinking about the good times in my past relationship 😩

    • @ericjohnson1579
      @ericjohnson1579 3 роки тому

      He is a great powerful man who helped me manifest back my ex three days ago without delay 💯 💯 💯

    • @alanna4148
      @alanna4148 3 роки тому +9

      Me too . Every single night I dream about him and missing him then when I wake up it is all a reality. It's so painful idk how much longer I can handle this

    • @sootyspark7281
      @sootyspark7281 Рік тому +1

      @@alanna4148 how are you doing?

    • @Oyuoyupui
      @Oyuoyupui Рік тому +1

      I feel the same way. But it’s sad to think about how the relationship changed and what’s the reality now. No contact and act like a stranger:(. I really miss him but I know he is not the person in my memory anymore

    • @imissme8313
      @imissme8313 Рік тому +1

      @@alanna4148how are u know 2 years later

  • @Araanor
    @Araanor 4 роки тому +107

    I recently got a new girlfriend and we are so good together. Today I heard the first song my Mexican ex sendt me, and for the first time I understood the lyrics cause I learned Spanish, and I started crying. I almost feel like I'm emotionally unfaithful.

    • @HHH-ye1ro
      @HHH-ye1ro 2 роки тому +4

      It’s totally OK for that wave of emotion to rush over you. That is a very powerful story. Accept it. Know that was a peaceful nugget that was saved in your brain. The hard work at learning a new language paid off. And now, you move on with your life.

    • @brandominoeffect
      @brandominoeffect 2 роки тому +4

      Same here man. Music and memories go hand in hand. I went to a still woozy concert that me & my ex listened to all the time and couldn’t stop thinking about her. But you gotta remember why it didn’t work out to bring you back to realitg

    • @truestrength-oz5kk
      @truestrength-oz5kk 5 місяців тому

      i just felt it today.. felt bad too

  • @lukem9650
    @lukem9650 5 років тому +265

    Flipping out here, thank you so much for answering my question Susan! Timeless advice, and I’m so grateful that you took the time to make this video! Thank you thank you thank you, this is exactly what I needed to hear!

    • @Hoo_huu
      @Hoo_huu 4 роки тому +3

      Luke M I’m dealing with this now 😔

    • @abramsscott2926
      @abramsscott2926 3 роки тому

      I am very happy I got my Ex back ❤️ with the help of Baba John he help me to get my Ex back in less than 24 hours

    • @pinkydabaddie7431
      @pinkydabaddie7431 Рік тому

      Forget ur ex u sexy hi

    • @Itsrealsitara
      @Itsrealsitara Рік тому +2

      You’re so handsome Luke!

  • @LX12399
    @LX12399 5 років тому +66

    “Look where you started” I will remind myself of this! ☺️

  • @Astharia
    @Astharia 5 років тому +205

    I feel like dealing with all that heart ache at once is too much so it comes in waves or is like onion layers that peel off one after another from time to time. So new stuff comes up and it might feel like a set back but it's really a leveling up in processing the past not an going back to the old again.

  • @ellebell9139
    @ellebell9139 5 років тому +116

    Damn Susan, your timing is always on point with these topics!

  • @honey2630
    @honey2630 5 років тому +25

    My ex has been horrible. I was doing so well four months after our divorce I even started to date. It was then that he started doing things to try to get my attention yet wouldn’t communicate with me. He would ‘poke’ me with various things to remind me of him. It worked and I spent all of 2018 in pain. I didn’t want the divorce in the first place so it’s been very difficult for me. He’s proven to be a manipulative, childish, selfish, narcissistic jerk who won’t let go but won’t give. It’s taken all my strength and faith to move forward. I’m in counseling and focusing on self love. I know I’m on the right path, it’s been two steps forward one step back but I know one day I’ll be strong enough that his ‘pokes’ won’t affect me anymore. Thank you Susan! Your sanity has helped me through this mess.

  • @nessiequin
    @nessiequin 4 роки тому +126

    I'm missing mine throughout this covid situation. We broke up at the end of January. I finally started to recover from the breakup throughout all of February, then we have this pandemic blow up in all our faces. Now all I want to do is see him and I wish I could go through this with him. It's very tough.

    • @corinnez7778
      @corinnez7778 4 роки тому +5

      Vanessa ME TOOO I felt thisssss

    • @classyme7533
      @classyme7533 4 роки тому +8

      OMG I THOUGHT I WAS THE ONLY ONE. Me and my ex broked up at the end of January too. We should support each other sis!

    • @classyme7533
      @classyme7533 4 роки тому +3

      William Stephenie oh hell no. I don’t want him back. I ain’t settling for less

    • @jarenlee1163
      @jarenlee1163 4 роки тому +1

      Me too he broke up with me last january

    • @hajeraabdullah9157
      @hajeraabdullah9157 4 роки тому +5

      Same here. It's been over 6 months and I still can't stop thinking about him.

  • @harleenvirk273
    @harleenvirk273 4 роки тому +17

    omg ITS REALLLLY true..
    im completely moving on.
    i just have a 1 out of 10 days where i dwell on my ex and stuff.
    and today was one..
    but you really changed my thinking!!

  • @livewebcast14
    @livewebcast14 5 років тому +49

    I learnt to leave the past in the past.

  • @arjwank.3369
    @arjwank.3369 4 роки тому +16

    I always listen to you when I'm confused.. And you always make me feel better.. Thank you so much.. I wish you a great success 🌹

  • @SongofaBeach2012
    @SongofaBeach2012 4 роки тому +67

    Its been almost 15 years since my ex ghosted me. I was doing fine and yes, I would think of him from time to time but it was nothing I couldn't shake off. Then in January I just had this moment of nostalgia, made the Huge mistake of looking him up on FB and discovered he is now married and has a 2nd child on the way. It sent me into a complete tailspin and ever since then, I have been completely consumed by my thoughts of him.
    My emotions are all over the place, I go from being sad, to moments of nostalgia, to yearning and anger. I am a mess. Idk what to do....mostly the feelings of rejection are killing me. He chose to marry her and left me in the dust. It hurts and I am absolutely heartbroken...how do I get over this intense re-living of him breaking my heart in 2006? Its like a dang flashback that has lasted nearly 2 months now 💔😥

    • @Lylamamma1997
      @Lylamamma1997 4 роки тому +11

      How are you doing Rachel? I am going through the exact same thing right now except I am happily married and haven't seen my ex in 34 years.

    • @sonaligurung1391
      @sonaligurung1391 4 роки тому +12

      So it's true... You can never forget your true love... Lives forever in our heart 😭😭😭

    • @Lylamamma1997
      @Lylamamma1997 4 роки тому +12

      @@sonaligurung1391 Yes. Absolutely. He is your true love but were You his? That is what is so hard about this. When we love someone we want them to be happy; even if it isn't with us. Its so hard to come to terms with it. But I did find an awesome husband so only think of him when I dream about him. Then the dreams set me off for weeks afterwards....like weeks meaning a few months

    • @sonaligurung1391
      @sonaligurung1391 4 роки тому +1

      @@Lylamamma1997 oh wow!!! Didn't expect I would get a reply. Thank you so much.😍😍😍

    • @gracelikerain5039
      @gracelikerain5039 4 роки тому +12

      No offense but most marriages fail and not to sound.... like a asshole but work on yourself give it a few years and they will be divorced... its very rare for a marriage to last these days

  • @LeprosuGnome
    @LeprosuGnome 5 років тому +95

    It's been 2 years already, what is my problem? :(

    • @lewistyler2932
      @lewistyler2932 4 роки тому +39

      It fucking sucks dude, I can’t be attracted to other women. I genuinely will forever love this girl as she was my actual first kiss.

    • @contr4dixion
      @contr4dixion 4 роки тому +4

      Were they that bad for you? Maybe they meant more to you than you realise?

    • @geescold2985
      @geescold2985 4 роки тому +2

      2years dude you gotta move on

    • @ellenoka
      @ellenoka 4 роки тому +1

      Omg same

    • @matthewlocke9225
      @matthewlocke9225 4 роки тому

      Lewis Tyler I feel that, I never kissed her but I should have. She’s all I want now but I can’t have her because she doesn’t want me anymore AND she’s going to a different college

  • @josienewnham8616
    @josienewnham8616 5 років тому +9

    I love that pearl necklace analogy. I absolutely LOVE Susan language! Such a valuable video. Beautiful advice as usual. Thank you Susan x

    • @SusanWinter
      @SusanWinter  5 років тому

      Thanks Josie

    • @jonnytonto5298
      @jonnytonto5298 5 років тому

      @@SusanWinter I would love to give you a pearl necklace! You are freakin gorgeous!

  • @aparnakhurana21
    @aparnakhurana21 5 місяців тому +2

    Thankyou so much Susan! You've been a significant part of my heartbreak journey. Now, after two years, I was feeling this way and stumbled across this video and clicked right away because I knew this was sent for me. Thankyou for your amazing work!

  • @Bill-qh6en
    @Bill-qh6en 3 роки тому +9

    Time doesn't heal after 28 years being divorced from my ex wife and trying to move on and having other relationships I realized the difference from love and sex.

    • @michealharrison7698
      @michealharrison7698 3 роки тому +1

      Hello, do you need help on how to get your ex back or restore someone you love?

    • @michealharrison7698
      @michealharrison7698 3 роки тому +1

      I want to recommend you to this love specialist who helped me restore my husband back to me few days ago after 2 years of divorce

    • @michealharrison7698
      @michealharrison7698 3 роки тому +1

      The love specialist can be of great help to you, he offers the best solution in restoring and fixing broken relationship.

    • @michealharrison7698
      @michealharrison7698 3 роки тому +1

      Text me on whatsap, So I could tell you more on how the love specialist helped me restore my husband back

    • @michealharrison7698
      @michealharrison7698 3 роки тому +1

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  • @jillianjillian5493
    @jillianjillian5493 4 роки тому +7

    In agreeance! Mind was boggled for a week. I have been focusing and meditating every day on my future in law of attraction. After this video I see now that I'm clearing out and making available room for my awakening towards my soulmate, a spiritual connection to someone that I have most in common with, kinda like something doesn't want me to move forward because my meditation and spiritual awareness is on its way and some force doesn't want to allow it. This means I stay the course smiling all the way. Thank you so much. I'm on the right track😝

  • @iamgoddessoflove
    @iamgoddessoflove 2 роки тому +1

    Constantly looking at things that remind you of your ex is not going to help you to get over them. You must discipline yourself not to do these things as this will help you to heal and move on from the hurt and pain.
    💙UA-camr That Helps People Overcome Toxic Relationships

  • @Z4U3398
    @Z4U3398 3 роки тому +7

    My honest advice? If you felt regret as I do just *live with it* & move on. Face it. When you're the one who hurt your partner as I did? I won't go back to her. Why? That is akin to never accepting all of the hurt that I've put her through, her trust that I've broken & her pride that I have trampled on. Nothing I do now can ever undo my past transgressions unto her. Thus, I accept all wrongdoings on my part. At the very least? I shoulder my mistakes, move on & let someone more deserving love her the way she should be.
    Some have asked me, "But what about you? Are you going to shoulder that guilt alone, forever?" Yes. And it doesn't matter. We men are just disposable, expandable members of society. That is why we're the one's who go to war, not our women. That is why we are providers by default. And that is why there is nothing special in being a man. We are only special because someone made us feel that way. Without her? Time to face our fate *alone* - for better or for worse but at least? Face it with dignity.
    Peace, my brothers.

    • @Z4U3398
      @Z4U3398 3 роки тому +1

      @Johnson William Nope. There's a difference between missing someone & understanding the reality of one's own situation. The latter takes strength of character. If everytime one missed an ex-lover, yielded in to emotions & made a U-turn for him/her? Then one is not living in the present. Everyone deserves to heal & carry on with life. No one should be a fool for life coach scams such as yours, truly. Just saying.

  • @SASSY20
    @SASSY20 4 роки тому +44

    I’ve been doing good for awhile and tonight I felt weak. I was tearing up and missing my ex and this video calmed me down and put me back on track.
    I will say, I do still feel sad that I can’t reach out to him and say hello because that wouldn’t be beneficial to either of us. I do miss him, but I don’t regret the decision. Keep pushing forward. What’s meant to be will be. ❤️

    • @kevinstone6947
      @kevinstone6947 3 роки тому

      Hello friend, don't give up on someone you love

    • @kevinstone6947
      @kevinstone6947 3 роки тому

      I can recommend someone for you who assisted me get back my ex

    • @kevinstone6947
      @kevinstone6947 3 роки тому

      He can assist you too
      Contact him on wassap

    • @kevinstone6947
      @kevinstone6947 3 роки тому

      *+2347040853792*

    • @HHH-ye1ro
      @HHH-ye1ro 2 роки тому

      You are correct. It is definitely not beneficial. If I was in his shoes, and somebody I was with for a very long time contacted me, I would think it was for just one reason. To discuss reconnecting. But if that is not in the cards, it’s best to forged separate paths. Stay strong.

  • @injection4786
    @injection4786 2 роки тому +5

    Its been 6yrs, damn i still miss her!

  • @technologylifestylechannel2908
    @technologylifestylechannel2908 5 років тому +5

    Thank you Susan for the videos. I have been watching your videos since my worst break up a year ago, and now experiencing my most amazing dating life, it’s been a wonderful grateful journey. Thank you 🙏

  • @lonner98
    @lonner98 2 роки тому +3

    Its been over 10 yrs. It took me a very long time to get over the divorce. Been doing great. Great wife great kids and life has been good. Then the other week, she wieghed very heavily on my heart. The pain of the divorce came back like it was yesterday. I was unbelievably confused. I was like what the hell is going on? Yes, she will forever have a peice of my heart but I love my wife. I've been fasting because I feel like God wants to reach out to her but that doesn't make sense to me. Why would he want me to contact her? I don't feel like it's to hook back up with her. That's why I'm fasting. Hoping to hear from God and know its God.

    • @CE-do2vm
      @CE-do2vm 6 місяців тому +1

      Can I ask how this progressed? Did you receive an answer from God? I'm trying to discern what I'm expected to do with these sudden inbound of feelings and thoughts that have been fine for years till now.

  • @stephaniemand
    @stephaniemand Рік тому +3

    I've been months doing incredibly well, felt like I would never miss him ever again. A weight was lifted from my shoulders last time we met and I realized he was nothing like I have imagined in a long time. There was nothing to miss, the person I've been missing doesn't exist or never did. Out of the blue tonight I started thinking about marrying my boyfriend and how emotional this could be for my ex if he would know. I wondered if he would be able to express sadness but I'm almost certain his ego won't allow. I don't know why but somehow I started missing him for no reason, no actual reason at all. I was worried why I was obsessing about needing to reach out to him but when my boyfriend came into the room I chose to be honest to him and told him I've been missing my ex for no reason and didn't understand where it came from. We laughed it off and I feel relieved being able to talk to my boyfriend about these things. I'm ok now but watching your video made me feel better about myself much more. Yes, I've been through much worse trying to get over him was one of the hardest things to do and I managed so well. I don't want him back and for the pain he has caused me, it wouldn't even be fair for myself to let him come close to me again. I'm glad I have found my current boyfriend in my life and we are doing wonderful I love him so much and I know we will end up together even when I miss an ex every once in a while, it doesn't have to mean anything.

  • @alura36
    @alura36 5 років тому +4

    Wow perfect timing as usual! I find that even after ten years I still stop, and gasp sometimes when a memory pops up or I finally go out on a date and think dammit, you aren’t him. 😔 I’ve spent almost ten years trying to replace him with no luck and I find it extremely difficult to move on despite how long it’s been. It was the greatest love of my life, just not the right time in our lives. Ive been on a beautiful journey of finding my career, finding contentment and happiness but that massive chunk of blissful love is missing, he’s married now and I’m alone yearning for forbidden fruit.
    I’m 44, I’ve been alone too long and it seems that no one measures up to what I’m looking for. I’m a time waster, a companion to play with no one wants to keep me...

    • @alura36
      @alura36 5 років тому

      Darcy M. Royce thank you for your reply. While I do the inner self talk monologue in my head ; I’m worthy I’m a strong valuable amazing person etc the problem I’m finding extremely common is men are looking for ms. Right now, not forever.
      I’m finding at my age, in my city the men are only interested in playing not for keeps. I’ve played for ten years so I’m just done now. I’ve matured and found my career and want a mature forever love at this stage in my life. Vancouver is full of players and jaded men coming out of divorce ... it’s very very difficult 😖

    • @evearcana2392
      @evearcana2392 3 роки тому

      @@alura36 Hi love- UA-cam search “dessa Neurofeedback” & watch how she also couldn’t move on from an ex of 10 years & how they used Neurofeedback therapy to help “cure” her . I hope it gives you some light at the end of the tunnel & I would highly recommend you finding a local practitioner & start the treatments. You don’t have to live like this any longer thank you already have. God bless you! Xx

  • @shawnevans3303
    @shawnevans3303 4 роки тому +4

    Thank you Susan, going through a divorce and this really helped me ❤️

  • @loriemmanuel636
    @loriemmanuel636 5 років тому +31

    So true Susan and that's when I feel it the most
    Early in the morning super anxious.. and then miss him and want to text and ask myself what is wrong with me

    • @alanna4148
      @alanna4148 3 роки тому

      Omg me too...I thought it was only me

  • @fiawang2644
    @fiawang2644 3 роки тому +5

    It’s been 5 years since we broke up, but I still remember him and missing the old moments.

  • @nigarmirza9992
    @nigarmirza9992 11 місяців тому +3

    How to control the thoughts when we suddenly recall our memories with the ex and they keep on popping in your mind and you suddenly lose your all focus and start feeling depressed.

    • @peaceofmindofpeace1650
      @peaceofmindofpeace1650 7 місяців тому +1

      It's such a strong feeling that I almost start to think he feels the same way at that moment but probably not.

  • @MarkMagnus86
    @MarkMagnus86 4 роки тому +2

    I haven't spoken to my ex in 10 years, and she's been on my mind for the past few years. I'm tempted to reach out to her and let her know that I'm fine in life, and I forgive her.

    • @uoibiy3136
      @uoibiy3136 4 роки тому

      True love never die, don't give up anything in life all hope is not lost. Do you need your ex back if yes I know a powerful man that can help you get your ex back he helped me too immediately without stress and delay

    • @uoibiy3136
      @uoibiy3136 4 роки тому

      message him on WhatApp.

    • @uoibiy3136
      @uoibiy3136 4 роки тому

      ____+234.....9058....626....063____

  • @elliajohn7663
    @elliajohn7663 4 роки тому +6

    I needed this. I had a family member recently pass away (yesterday) and my ex from 4 years ago offered to come over for support. I havent seen him in over 3 years...long story short, I didn't end up seeing him, but then all day today I literally cant stop thinking about missing him. I think I'm just in an emotional state so everything is overwhelming, but I definitely needed to hear this advice! Thank you, Susan.

    • @kevinstone6947
      @kevinstone6947 3 роки тому

      Hello friend, don't give up on someone you love
      I recommend someone for you who assisted me get back my ex and manifest my ex to make peace with me
      I am so happy my broken relationship has been restored
      I believe he will assist you too

    • @kevinstone6947
      @kevinstone6947 3 роки тому

      Wassap him

    • @kevinstone6947
      @kevinstone6947 3 роки тому

      *+2347040853792*

    • @elliajohn7663
      @elliajohn7663 3 роки тому

      @@kevinstone6947 thank you, but I don't love my ex anymore, so I'm not giving up on him. I'm very happy with my life and have everything I need.

  • @Peter_Parker69
    @Peter_Parker69 4 роки тому +41

    or you miss him cause you gave up too quickly like always realizing grass ain't greener on the other side and everytime you go from one relationship to another it looses value and you become more and more hollow

    • @janiehudson2601
      @janiehudson2601 4 роки тому

      I feel this

    • @Lylamamma1997
      @Lylamamma1997 4 роки тому +3

      @@janiehudson2601 Me too and its 34 years later. I've been happily remarried 27 years but no kids together. Just found out the ex just had new baby with young wife. I know that I gave up too soon years ago because I am now with someone similar to my ex who is a great person. Was having dreams about him last month - just trying to meet to talk and clear the air. Then this global crisis hits with the virus and I started thinking of him again. I'm having a hard time sleeping.

    • @ellie321_01
      @ellie321_01 4 роки тому

      So true

  • @tokayanazolana9543
    @tokayanazolana9543 9 місяців тому +1

    Missing my ex so much it hurts, I have been doing well 😢😢 I had moved on

  • @rodrigomorales5191
    @rodrigomorales5191 10 місяців тому +1

    It sucks for me because as we go into fall this november it will remind me a lot of when we met. As the seasons change it brings a whole wave of nostalgia and its eating me alive and get fuckin emotional. I wish i could just forget her. Ive tried so much to hangout with friends, focus on work, hobbies but its not helping

  • @myenemysenemy1043
    @myenemysenemy1043 2 роки тому +2

    I notice that I miss a certain ex (not always the same one) whenever present circumstances don't feel so great, and I start reminiscing about a time when life could have gone differently. Of course, there's nothing to say that my life would be better in the present if I'd remained with any of those exes, it's just human nature to think that way.

  • @suaveray
    @suaveray 5 років тому +2

    Hi Susan, thank you for all of your videos. You're advice has been a big help in getting over a recent break up. My girlfriend broke up with me a little over two weeks ago and I'm still pretty upset and confused by it all. We had such a good relationship with amazing chemistry and total honesty. (if it matters I'm 50 and she's 38). I told her things about myself that I've never told ANYONE. I felt that safe with her. There was never any jealousy at all with either of us. It was something I have never experienced. She was so good for me. I thought we were good for each other. Just about two months ago she gave me a beautiful book of pictures of us and poetry she wrote about us and how much she loved me. That was our one year anniversary. It sure seemed like a relationship that was going to last when she did something that special for me. So from her doing that to 8 weeks later telling me that she doesn't think we're right for each other is a hell of a shock. She has been really depressed, more so than I realized. I was part of that because I sometimes get into moods where I complain about life too much (Winter time and Christmas I get particularly down sometimes). She's very sensitive and she did tell me that was difficult for her to deal with at times. So I've been working on being more positive and not bringing her down. Then about 4 weeks ago her family lost a nephew who was only 21. This I think was the final trigger where she decided she needed to not be with me. Her texts that week were really distant so I asked her why. I asked her if we were okay and she said "don't worry honey, we're fine". But she admittedly was putting off telling me that her feelings had changed. She was very sorry and in tears but she said she needed to be on her own and that we were too different and not good for each other. That she had lost her light and needed to find it again. She said she needed to be alone for a while "possibly a very long time" she said. So, off she went. My last email to her was a the monday after she broke up with me and I'm not going to reach out to her. I'm going to leave her alone. But its so hard. I love her so much. She hopes we can be friends down the road (that's of course pretty much what everyone says), but I don't think I'm going to be able to do that. I don't know maybe but I can't see it right now. I hate the thought of her never being in my life again but I fear that even after a year if I saw her it would just rip the wound open again. And now my fears of being able to find someone else at 50 years old are really weighing on me. Also to find someone like her I feel is almost impossible. We are both two of the rarest personality types (shes and INFJ I'm and INFP) so I feel that's why we got along so well. That's why it was so easy to open up to each other completely. I feel like finding another girl I could click with like that is as impossible as winning the lottery. So I'm very sad and very lonely right now.
    Anyway, I don't know if you will respond to this or not, I totally get it if you don't as you have tons of people reaching out to you about relationship issues. But just typing out my problems helps even if I get no response.
    Keep up the good work Susan. -Erik
    P.S. (I'm also a Winter!)

    • @Lylamamma1997
      @Lylamamma1997 4 роки тому

      Thank you for your story. I hope you are doing better now.

    • @tambaker5167
      @tambaker5167 Рік тому

      It's been three years - how are you doing now?

    • @suaveray
      @suaveray Рік тому +1

      @@tambaker5167 Hey thanks for thinking of me. I'm getting by. Moved into a new house a couple years ago. I've struggled with depression like everyone else through covid. But I've always struggled with it. I think relationships are a thing of the past for me. I'm getting too old. Again I really appreciate you taking the time to reach out. Take care.

    • @tambaker5167
      @tambaker5167 Рік тому

      @@suaveray Maybe it's easier to just find peace in being single, I often think this. But you never know who is randomly going to cross your path. I hope the depression takes it easy on you, I can relate. Take care!

  • @richardrichard9953
    @richardrichard9953 2 роки тому +1

    It’s been 36 years and all of a sudden I get hit with an overwhelming feeling of missing her. I was in love but I was a rebound guy for her. I would never reach out. Just watch a few self help videos and then just continue on.

  • @aboutmillions
    @aboutmillions 2 роки тому +2

    I'm thankful for this video because today was roughhhh lol I thought about her so much after months of not healing & working on myself. I felt like I had relapsed but this put it into perspective for me. Thank you, it's all a part of the healing process

  • @jhanvidoshi4296
    @jhanvidoshi4296 7 місяців тому +1

    Thankyou so much genuinely needed to hear this ❤️🌻

  • @constancegoldwing5867
    @constancegoldwing5867 5 років тому

    Susan Winter you are a breath of fresh air!

  • @janettedewar6617
    @janettedewar6617 4 роки тому +4

    Back sliding is a great word and I thought it was just me

  • @klew262
    @klew262 4 роки тому +4

    I broke up with My high school sweet heart when we were young and not thinking straight. Within two years she got married and I will never forget her face as she told me she was engaged, like she was begging me to say something, but I never did. I eventually settled and married a few years after. It's been ten years, we both have families now. I have dreamed about her at least once a week for the past ten years. We were best friends since we were six all the way through high school. I've always felt numb inside ever since we split and its never gone away. I've never loved since, and some times I feel the need to just ask her if she ever has any regrets or if she even knows who I am anymore. I am tired of going through life numb and just pretending to be happy, but I could never destroy some one else's family. My wife has no idea and is always in la la la unicorn land and she is so happy. But I repeatedly find myself searching for her on social media, just to see her face. But that of course just makes it all worse. I guess deep down I just want to know if it's just me? Or maybe she is dealing with the same struggles

    • @uoibiy3136
      @uoibiy3136 4 роки тому

      True love never die, don't give up anything in life all hope is not lost. Do you need your ex back if yes I know a powerful man that can help you get your ex back he helped me too immediately without stress and delay

    • @uoibiy3136
      @uoibiy3136 4 роки тому +1

      message him on WhatApp.

    • @uoibiy3136
      @uoibiy3136 4 роки тому +1

      ✝2⃣3⃣4⃣9⃣0⃣5⃣8⃣6⃣2⃣6⃣0⃣6⃣3⃣

    • @neskorock
      @neskorock 3 роки тому +2

      Reb Lew I feel the same. I really want to know if he ever miss me at all. But I don’t know how to open a conversation with him. I always look at his profile just to see his smile.

    • @klew262
      @klew262 3 роки тому

      neskowin smithrock yea it's like you know you can't do anything about it and you'll feel stupid cause they may not be truly honest and say they don't have feelings even if they did, I don't know

  • @shinigami117s8
    @shinigami117s8 5 років тому +13

    I’ve pretty much concluded that it’s because the ex is missing us. We pick up on their energy.

    • @TheBadWisdom
      @TheBadWisdom 5 років тому

      You think so??? So you mean that suddednly we start to think of them because they think about us?

    • @shinigami117s8
      @shinigami117s8 5 років тому +9

      Precisely . It sounds absolutely absurd but it’s true. You’ll see soon enough

    • @TheBadWisdom
      @TheBadWisdom 5 років тому +4

      Cause it happened to me as well! I started thinking about him out of the blue!!! Not a big deal, just a little bit but it surprised me because it came really out of the blue! I haven't met him or spoken to him from june!!!

    • @shinigami117s8
      @shinigami117s8 5 років тому +6

      TheBadWisdom haha ya I haven’t seen or talked to my ex gf in over a year. Then all of a sudden she popped into my mind. I felt neutral about it. But then I meditated to cleanse out old energy to be myself again. Welcome to the world of “law of attraction !!”

    • @TheBadWisdom
      @TheBadWisdom 5 років тому

      So you know what I mean!!! Hahahaha!!! It doesn't bother me, it's just weird, you know!!! Anyway, if the law of attraction commands so...😉

  • @Nekole1
    @Nekole1 4 роки тому +4

    Thanks for this video. I am missing my ex right now. Its been 1 week of no contact for me. Some days I hardly think about him and others days Im thinking of him alot. I find myself thinking about him the most at night when Im laying in bed. But I refuse to contact him. I made a fool of myself when i contacted him before I started the no contact rule. I begged, and cried. And even cursed him out. Now that Im thinking about it, it was very much unlike me. Im usually the one keeping my cool. I think so badly he wanted to see me lose my cool by having another women answer his phone. And yes I lost it. I want to be over him completely. He has someone in his life. I know with time it gets better but wish this process would hurry up. I have tried everything with staying busy to going to the library to find new books. And this has helped some. I also started back talking to other men. But right now im not 100% ready to date. I just want to heal from my ex and be done with thinking of what happened. The experienced made me feel low. I am a woman who is usually good at avoiding situations like this and holding it all together but it can happen to anyone. Hopefully time heals this.

    • @Itsbigdaddyquinn
      @Itsbigdaddyquinn 4 роки тому

      Hi! I was just wondering how you are doing now ? It’s been a week no contact for me right now too :(

  • @swamppiratesco
    @swamppiratesco 4 роки тому +2

    I'm crying right now, this is just what I needed to hear thank you.

  • @birtakarenaxelsdottir4917
    @birtakarenaxelsdottir4917 5 років тому +2

    Omg! Thank you so much. This video helped me so much to understand what I’m going through❤️❤️❤️

  • @moringga432
    @moringga432 5 років тому +1

    omg MICA IS SUPER TOO CUTE♥ let her be on all videos!

  • @berlinbrittany
    @berlinbrittany 5 років тому +2

    Wow everything you said was perfect. You are amazing! This helps a lot!

  • @Truthfully-Dreamworld
    @Truthfully-Dreamworld Місяць тому

    And idk why I stared getting lonely outta nowhere and I stared crying. And I don’t know why 😭…. But he did me so wrong. It’s getting easier now. I feel stronger than before.

  • @kristinapalett3127
    @kristinapalett3127 4 роки тому +2

    Many thanks for the reassurance you brought in such a kind way!

  • @ft4686
    @ft4686 5 років тому +4

    Hey Ms Winter, i just got dumped by someone on the rebound 3 months ago and your videos helped me greatly for my recovery. Now i am smarter!
    Could you do a video on how to be an attractive woman? I'm entering university and i'd like to find a partner for marriage! Love you xoxo!

  • @sushant100koul
    @sushant100koul 4 роки тому +1

    Hi Susan,
    I hope you are also doing well in this pandemic. Your thoughts make a lot of sense in a practical manner but it is beyond our sense to loose an emotional sense for the person whome we love. You say it very practically. But you and me know the world we live is beyond practical. Its very hard to kinda move on for forever .But yes this is the truth, you will remember them sometimes, you will cry, you will smile and then you will eat your next meal. And try to live more happy moments in life

  • @dodo4553
    @dodo4553 2 роки тому

    It's been years that i didn't think about her not even once. But out of nowhere i suddenly miss her so badly. She is a wonderful girl. I wish that next life we could be together 😌 it didn't end well. I know it was my fault. By strengthening my walls i broke her heart.

  • @moonship9328
    @moonship9328 4 роки тому +4

    It’s been two years and I still missed my ex so much and I don’t feel attracted to any girl but her ! , it’s like part of me die or a locked door in my heart open only for her .
    in our culture there is saying “he lives in her shadow“ which means he die with her love and he can’t start relationship because part of him feel he still in relationship with her” .
    I’m in situation I can’t start relationship because of that and the reason of that because our connection was so crazy that I can feel what she been through when she is in another city :
    -if she get sick , my heart pulse becomes strange .
    -if she angry I feel images of her upset invade my head telling me she doesn’t feel okay.
    - The worse thing when she sad and miss me my chest squeeze my lungs so hard that I start to have shortness and interruptions in my inhale.
    I can’t explain a lot things here but even one time her finger swell out and I was driving and I felt something going on with my hand until I start to notice my finger swell out .
    it’s very hard to fight it and control it because it randomly happened without me thinking of her . it just my body very loyal to her and he give me these warnings signals when she is not good but I don’t need that because and I’m trying to move on and forget her .

    • @WHaAteVaA
      @WHaAteVaA 4 роки тому

      does that really happen? how long have you been with her?

    • @jessy9369
      @jessy9369 4 роки тому

      Dude we need more info.. why did you break up and why cant you get back together?

  • @Hy3q4l
    @Hy3q4l 5 років тому +1

    right in time susan! its been 4 months + of no contact,thank you

  • @mariacure9956
    @mariacure9956 5 років тому +1

    Thank you So Much! Forever Grateful Susan🥰

  • @bobbyjuju7442
    @bobbyjuju7442 5 років тому +3

    I needed to hear this this evening. Thank you!!

  • @jayasreepadhy3692
    @jayasreepadhy3692 2 місяці тому

    Suddenly I am having panic attacks and anxietys , can't sleep well don't know why suddenly I am missing him

  • @rathikala9292
    @rathikala9292 Рік тому

    Loved 7years. We separated 2007.
    But in 2023 I still I cant sleeps all our thoughts are still fresh...
    Feeling very lonely.

  • @12bitizthewaytogo92
    @12bitizthewaytogo92 5 місяців тому +1

    im not over my ex and its been 20 yrs each day something makes me think of her its sad and cant get over her doesnt matter what i do, and the kicker is i am married and dont get me wrong i love my wife but i still cant get over the ex cant explain it

  • @loidabaez7747
    @loidabaez7747 2 роки тому

    I haven't talked to my ex for a month. He only text me to pick up things. I put it outside my door, because I didn't want to see him. I was doing so good the whole time. All the of the sudden one day I missed him so much. My chest hurt. I called him once, he didn't answer. I'm sort of glad he didn't, but now I feel bad, because I feel like I took a step backwards in my healing.

  • @JamekaVibes
    @JamekaVibes 5 років тому +1

    Thank you, Susan. I needed to hear this.

  • @nehalinga
    @nehalinga 4 роки тому +3

    Love your work, Susan! ❤

  • @EdrinXT
    @EdrinXT 2 роки тому

    Your wisdom inspires me. Thank you for all you do.

  • @editazilinskyte3681
    @editazilinskyte3681 4 роки тому +4

    In the video you said look at where you started. But for me it's the opposite. When we broke up I was filled with joy and would literally jump out of my bath every morning and dance and spin like Cinderella. But as time goes i start missing him. I think of the shows we watched. The notes we left. The way he says my name. And it hurts so much. We broke up because although he's great It took me 2 years to realise you can't force yourself to be attracted to someone and some people should just be friends. But how do I deal with this? I know I made the right choice and I'm happy I don't have to force my self to engage in romance with someone I'm not interested in or pretend. But it's very hard to let go someone you genually get along with. We had such good times together. We clicked when we met, I have never experienced that with anyone before or after him and I'm so scared I never will again.

  • @SleeperRusk
    @SleeperRusk Рік тому

    Thank you for your free service, love it 😊

  • @InsaaniatDost
    @InsaaniatDost 5 років тому +4

    😈👽Ex = Axe
    Stop injuring yourself again and again..
    I did that. And hurt my self badly in friend zone.
    Ex is expired.. forgo and move on

  • @lacierichko8227
    @lacierichko8227 4 роки тому +1

    I’m so happy I came across this ! Thank you!

  • @goldenlifelove7251
    @goldenlifelove7251 Рік тому

    It's been 7 week since my ex blindsided me with a breakup & i haven't wanted to reach out to him at all since the day after he ended things. However, today I've had the urge to do so several times. I WILL NOT CONTACT HIM EVER!! I WILL NOT HIVE HIM THE OPPORTUNITY TO REJECT ME TWICE!!

  • @celebbabe123
    @celebbabe123 4 роки тому +3

    What if it's been 2 months and you been okay for those 2 months then you just start missing them like crazy to the point where you can hardly breathe and you think about the every second and its 2 whole weeks straight 😔😭😭

  • @mayowaogunnaike9118
    @mayowaogunnaike9118 5 років тому +5

    We ( she) broke up 2016 and all of a sudden, seeing her on LinkedIn I'm taking extra measures to not contact her. I need help for real ...

    • @kevinstone6947
      @kevinstone6947 3 роки тому

      Hello friend, don't give up on someone you love
      I recommend someone for you who assisted me get back my ex and manifest my ex to make peace with me
      I am so happy my broken relationship has been restored
      I believe he will assist you too

    • @kevinstone6947
      @kevinstone6947 3 роки тому

      Wassap him

    • @kevinstone6947
      @kevinstone6947 3 роки тому

      *+2347040853792*

  • @onm9128
    @onm9128 5 років тому +6

    Great video! And I believe every human experiences this. Depending on the circumstance around the relatedness (while it lasted) & the break up, we gotta make a conscious decision to / not focus on those momentary feelings the subconscious mind churns out; focusing on them I believe would mean feeding them to linger on / continue
    Many thanks, Sussan. Unusually adoring look today

  • @adorabellenamigadde6605
    @adorabellenamigadde6605 5 років тому +1

    You have such a calming voice.

  • @durvapathak5891
    @durvapathak5891 Рік тому

    Thank you Susan, I can't thank you enough😭❤

  • @zunazi12
    @zunazi12 4 місяці тому

    I become obsessed for a while when we have contact together but when we are apart a bit i start to look at things differently and then when i meet him things return back and so on

  • @freshcinnabonsmaam8822
    @freshcinnabonsmaam8822 4 роки тому +3

    Well I mean it might be because we cuddled at a party and stared into each other’s eyes for a long time idk man 🤷‍♀️ We broke up on good terms and are still very close friends

  • @Bmoney902
    @Bmoney902 4 роки тому +3

    My ex appeared back in my dms in june, he came to apologise and looking back now I wonder if he was testing the waters but I wasn't having it. I have times where I don't think about him and times where I miss how things were and times when I am SO ANGRY at him. I'd rather be angry than sad, but I feel like the past couple of days I've been more sad. I hate it.

    • @uoibiy3136
      @uoibiy3136 4 роки тому

      True love never die, don't give up anything in life all hope is not lost. Do you need your ex back if yes I know a powerful man that can help you get your ex back he helped me too immediately without stress and delay

    • @uoibiy3136
      @uoibiy3136 4 роки тому

      message him on WhatApp.

    • @uoibiy3136
      @uoibiy3136 4 роки тому

      ✝2⃣3⃣4⃣9⃣0⃣5⃣8⃣6⃣2⃣6⃣0⃣6⃣3⃣

  • @nancyjames7126
    @nancyjames7126 3 роки тому +3

    I was wondering this because I am happily married, almost 5 years. 6 years since the break up with my ex who I was with for 4 1/2 years but today I got like this sad feeling like missing him, and had that lovesick feeling in my gut. IDK why, so random.

    • @LoveLife-ry5mm
      @LoveLife-ry5mm 3 роки тому

      hello do you need help on how to get your ex back or to restore someone you 💓

    • @LoveLife-ry5mm
      @LoveLife-ry5mm 3 роки тому

      there is a love specialist who help me get my ex back after 2years of divorce...

    • @LoveLife-ry5mm
      @LoveLife-ry5mm 3 роки тому

      ✝1⃣2⃣0⃣4⃣5⃣0⃣0⃣1⃣6⃣6⃣2⃣,,

    • @goodnessogun5416
      @goodnessogun5416 3 роки тому

      842054

  • @chichinwosu5007
    @chichinwosu5007 4 роки тому

    Thank you! This gave me a lot of relief just now.

  • @dashachess4204
    @dashachess4204 4 роки тому +1

    This doesn't explain exactly WHY we suddenly think and miss of an ex that we been over for years? It's been a complete opposite for me, I've let go of this person for years and all the sudden I can't stop thinking about them after a dream.

    • @bitaanousheh3033
      @bitaanousheh3033 4 роки тому

      Hello dear there is a good lady who can help you get back your ex

    • @bitaanousheh3033
      @bitaanousheh3033 4 роки тому

      +2349026828927:/

    • @dashachess4204
      @dashachess4204 4 роки тому

      @@bitaanousheh3033 No... and If you wrote this out of good intentions then why would you want me to have that kind of karma? My worst taunting fear has already happened. He's a married man, and I don't want to ruin anyone's happiness. I just need a way to let go that's strong enough to not be triggered by the dreams of this person.

  • @nithintravelworld8860
    @nithintravelworld8860 5 років тому

    Susan your topics are always interesting 💜👌🙋

  • @nataliawysocka2888
    @nataliawysocka2888 5 років тому +5

    Thank you Susan!!!! This makes me feel better now 🥰

  • @star_7776
    @star_7776 Рік тому

    I left this guy, because I discovered that he had a girlfriend when were having a physical relationship. Now, after two years, I am thinking about him and wanting him back...From nowhere, I was never in love with him it was just a strong attraction. What is that?

  • @taniaarmenta3485
    @taniaarmenta3485 3 місяці тому

    My boyfriend of almost 2 years left to another state for recovery from alcohol and he decided he is not coming back , for his own reasons , but that doesn't take the pain and sadness away it's been a little over 2 and a half months since we stopped talking to eachother , I guess it hurts so much because we went through some real difficult times together with GOD , I TRUST GOD , AND IM LOOKING FORWARD TO MY FUTURE , but I'm taking it slow and HEALING 😌.

  • @peanutbutterpancakes5460
    @peanutbutterpancakes5460 Рік тому

    I feel bad for what i did those moments i took his love for granted and now he has a girlfriend and here i am still thinking about him and his sweet little smile.Its like he haunting me like im trying to put everything in the past and forgive myself for what I did and he keeps popping up...i wish i could hate him or something but i really can't he was just too good to me.

  • @nouraghaith5122
    @nouraghaith5122 5 місяців тому +2

    Thank you

  • @susangj300
    @susangj300 5 років тому +3

    Good morning!!

  • @dominiccobb6470
    @dominiccobb6470 5 років тому +1

    great advice :) thank you

  • @mt485
    @mt485 5 років тому +1

    Perfect timing!

  • @IAMWILVER
    @IAMWILVER Рік тому

    This was so helpful.

  • @martinburrows6844
    @martinburrows6844 7 місяців тому

    This is very good. Thank you

  • @benedictaalfonso5802
    @benedictaalfonso5802 4 роки тому +1

    We all missed our X

  • @monigiselle2140
    @monigiselle2140 7 місяців тому

    Good advice 👍 thank you ❤

  • @jessicawarn2010
    @jessicawarn2010 3 роки тому

    You made me feel better, thank you x

    • @wilsonleo7299
      @wilsonleo7299 3 роки тому

      Hello friend do you need help to get your ex back

    • @wilsonleo7299
      @wilsonleo7299 3 роки тому

      It works without delay contact him on WhatsApp+2349049504546

  • @revealhissecretobsession8332
    @revealhissecretobsession8332 2 роки тому +1

    No matter how many times I texted him, he never responded. There should be some education to learn how to respect relationship.

    • @olaniyiabe4929
      @olaniyiabe4929 2 роки тому

      Do you need help to recover your relationship back with your ex? I recommend you to Maria intuition a relationship restorer he helped me get my ex back few days ago he can also bring your lover back✅✅✅

    • @olaniyiabe4929
      @olaniyiabe4929 2 роки тому

      ✝1928

    • @olaniyiabe4929
      @olaniyiabe4929 2 роки тому

      297

    • @olaniyiabe4929
      @olaniyiabe4929 2 роки тому

      5894