The Wrong Way to Get Through a Breakup - Chris Distefano

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  • Опубліковано 4 гру 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 740

  • @lundylow
    @lundylow 3 роки тому +430

    I love when people are alarmingly accurately self-aware.

  • @nataliaalfonso2662
    @nataliaalfonso2662 4 роки тому +2715

    He’s every guy I hated growing up which is why I deeply love him.

    • @experimentsandpranks
      @experimentsandpranks 4 роки тому +73

      very confused

    • @nataliaalfonso2662
      @nataliaalfonso2662 4 роки тому +116

      Isaiah Belford he tugs at my nostalgic heartstrings. My hometown sense of humor. He was actually friends with a lot of my friends in high school.

    • @experimentsandpranks
      @experimentsandpranks 4 роки тому +16

      @@nataliaalfonso2662 LMFAO I WAS KIDDING

    • @CheeksOfButt
      @CheeksOfButt 4 роки тому +6

      Isaiah Belford 😂😂😂

    • @sbakernyc5761
      @sbakernyc5761 4 роки тому +4

      Lol you knew Molloy boys? Almost went there... lot of my friends did

  • @MichaelBarrett1984
    @MichaelBarrett1984 4 роки тому +630

    “Pistachio? Let me see your divorce papers.”

  • @Nutteri
    @Nutteri 4 роки тому +4351

    We went to see Chris a few years ago with a couple of German friends and I’ll never forget when he asked our group where we came from:
    “Oh you from Germany?”
    “Yeah”
    “You know the bicycle was invented by Germans?”
    “Really?”
    “Yeah, it’s a crazy idea. But you know Germans are known for some craazy ideas.”

  • @imark2569
    @imark2569 4 роки тому +1445

    How he describes himself is exactly what I thought of him before I even clicked on the title

  • @cesg7749
    @cesg7749 4 роки тому +561

    “Chocolate sprinks” 😂😂😂

    • @bruin1771
      @bruin1771 4 роки тому +6

      Closer got me hard

    • @bruin1771
      @bruin1771 4 роки тому +8

      Lmfao not that kinda hard you know what i mean lol

    • @cesg7749
      @cesg7749 4 роки тому +2

      Terry Myers 😂

    • @strawberryjam7774
      @strawberryjam7774 4 роки тому +2

      hes so NYC that he aint even know to say jimmies in Boston

    • @nadeenmohiar6193
      @nadeenmohiar6193 4 роки тому +1

      Terry Myers looooool

  • @selfishcrab
    @selfishcrab 4 роки тому +378

    Love the riff at 6:17 when he senses the crowd sat on his rotator cuff tag

    • @BGriff-
      @BGriff- 4 роки тому +55

      The one girl clapping that hard definitely didnt know.

    • @danielglassmeyer1381
      @danielglassmeyer1381 4 роки тому +28

      I think he knows that tag works from prior audience reactions and I love it even more assuming that’s the set up

    • @codybasore2747
      @codybasore2747 4 роки тому +6

      I loved that too! I've watched him do that joke before and he didn't say that. very funny lol.

    • @RobstaBerkeley21
      @RobstaBerkeley21 3 роки тому

      I mean he definitely got me lol

    • @KevinTanaka
      @KevinTanaka 2 роки тому +4

      @@BGriff- or maybe she was the only one that knew. I saw that coming because I do Physical Therapy and most people call it a rotary cup

  • @TheTexican05
    @TheTexican05 2 роки тому +50

    My first Chris D experience was his awesome story about his Italian monster father coming down to the school, locking the principal in his own office and threatening him until he dropped the expulsion charges against Chris.
    Hearing it in the NYC accent and some of Chris’s punchlines…pure gold. 🙌
    Anyone here who hasn’t seen it needs to.
    “So I did what I was told. Because I’m daddy’s little princess!” 🤣

  • @latoyalewis
    @latoyalewis 4 роки тому +828

    “Let me see your divorce papers” 😂😂😂

    • @bbutler14gmail
      @bbutler14gmail 4 роки тому +3

      La Toya Lewis I know I lost it on that part too! 😂 You must go to the adult store to buy porn or pistachio icecream 😂😂

    • @nathandelamora7107
      @nathandelamora7107 4 роки тому +1

      Page Butler 😂😂😂😂

    • @ailawil89
      @ailawil89 4 роки тому +1

      It’s “divawce paypuhs”. LOL

    • @ActuallyNoah
      @ActuallyNoah 2 роки тому

      “Recent colonoscopy” made me laugh considering I just had one at seventeen 😆

  • @superegobeats
    @superegobeats 4 роки тому +62

    How he caught the fact that the crowd didn’t know it was rotator cuff was awesome.

  • @hunterfowler8322
    @hunterfowler8322 3 роки тому +24

    "Put some sprinks on it". A sentence I never knew I needed to hear.

  • @TheEnderBand
    @TheEnderBand 3 роки тому +415

    Love how he says “sprinks” then gets mad at the kid saying “pistach’” lmao

    • @paulmow3024
      @paulmow3024 3 роки тому +6

      Yeah that’s on purpose
      It’s called comedy

    • @TheEnderBand
      @TheEnderBand 3 роки тому +16

      @@paulmow3024 thanks for clearing that up

    • @NEILANIL1
      @NEILANIL1 2 роки тому +1

      That's comedy 🤣

  • @Bovice..YT-handles-are-fn-dumb
    @Bovice..YT-handles-are-fn-dumb 4 роки тому +775

    Comedy Central needs Chrissy D. NOT the other way around.

    • @fierystag6357
      @fierystag6357 4 роки тому +12

      It's just what it is, plain and simp.

    • @kleb42
      @kleb42 4 роки тому

      You’re right kid

  • @matthewfitzgerald7710
    @matthewfitzgerald7710 4 роки тому +300

    Dude straight killed this set

    • @footballroxx24
      @footballroxx24 4 роки тому +10

      Eastsrn coast confidencce nj/ ny stand up lmao

    • @bananapee86
      @bananapee86 2 роки тому

      DONT MESS WITH THE GINA’s

  • @georgephilis
    @georgephilis 4 роки тому +87

    Absolutely love how he takes jabs at his parents, especially his dad, so funny :-)

  • @machariamuragori9587
    @machariamuragori9587 4 роки тому +3470

    half of his material is things he should be telling a therapist

    • @chosarang9488
      @chosarang9488 4 роки тому +516

      Welcome to comedy

    • @melvina628
      @melvina628 4 роки тому +29

      About his priest.

    • @BigDeezle420
      @BigDeezle420 4 роки тому +17

      Watch him on Ryan Sicklers show, he deep dives

    • @auroraborealis13579
      @auroraborealis13579 4 роки тому +8

      @@chosarang9488 I was literally going to comment this. 🙏☝️🌠

    • @wendel5868
      @wendel5868 4 роки тому +8

      Dr. Ruffus Barker The whole Bill Burr’s material too

  • @grim9172
    @grim9172 4 роки тому +1797

    He’s complaining about pistach but just called sprinkles sprinks like 4 times...

    • @dumaskhan
      @dumaskhan 4 роки тому +97

      that's called righteous indignash!

    • @gamesofcontent
      @gamesofcontent 4 роки тому +206

      Almost as if it was part if the joke

    • @Abrahamhamham
      @Abrahamhamham 4 роки тому +26

      Yo, lighten up. It's COMEDY.

    • @corbinstumm
      @corbinstumm 4 роки тому +5

      @@gamesofcontent yeah this guy, i swear

    • @bbutler14gmail
      @bbutler14gmail 4 роки тому +9

      Hey hey now... the man’s beautiful AND funny. ..He can say watever he wants 🤷🏽‍♀️😂😂

  • @timboslice8559
    @timboslice8559 3 роки тому +35

    He deserves a Netflix special!!!

  • @ShadowsArch
    @ShadowsArch 4 роки тому +2651

    Still has crazy chaotic bisexual energy

  • @SLICKDEXIC
    @SLICKDEXIC 4 роки тому +591

    This guy has Sal Vulcano energy

    • @Drew-hd4hm
      @Drew-hd4hm 4 роки тому +12

      Yess!!!!!! Well said

    • @mimigiggles4199
      @mimigiggles4199 4 роки тому +16

      Were on something's burning with Bert Kreischer together.

    • @yigyog
      @yigyog 4 роки тому +11

      thought the same thing the instant he said "sprinks"

    • @ex-hecticskeptic8303
      @ex-hecticskeptic8303 4 роки тому +1

      Thank you! I was immediately wondering why he seemed so familiar lol

    • @ajhc18
      @ajhc18 4 роки тому +7

      Think they’re really good friends.

  • @jessiesargent7212
    @jessiesargent7212 4 роки тому +205

    I have always loved pistachio ice cream. It's one of my favorite colors and since I spent a lot of time with my great grandparents, I ate a lot of old people food. I was that kid who ordered liver and onions at restaurants lol

    • @GoodCookinAquarius
      @GoodCookinAquarius 4 роки тому +5

      It's good with rice.

    • @HitPeace
      @HitPeace 3 роки тому +14

      Let me see your divorce papers!

    • @jlui21
      @jlui21 2 роки тому +6

      - where's your AARP card? Did you get the diabtres with that pistachio ice cream, mam?

    • @jessiesargent7212
      @jessiesargent7212 2 роки тому +3

      @@HitPeace no not divorced. I've been married for 15 years next month

    • @captainjack2014
      @captainjack2014 2 роки тому +3

      @@jessiesargent7212 I also love pistachio flavor ice cream...and here's another oldie i love...Butter Pecan..lol

  • @FatJoke
    @FatJoke 4 роки тому +52

    Cartridge, Eucalyptus, Rotary Cuffs ... I swear my mother in law always says she needs to get „her electric lights“ instead of electrolytes.

  • @flangecorp9789
    @flangecorp9789 4 роки тому +84

    "Cmon Mom, you know I love pistache."

  • @strawberryjam7774
    @strawberryjam7774 4 роки тому +281

    hes so NY he aint even know they're called jimmies in Boston

    • @terrycrews1760
      @terrycrews1760 4 роки тому +11

      strawberry Jam WHats called jimmies? I’m from Houston. We call condoms jimmies lol

    • @strawberryjam7774
      @strawberryjam7774 4 роки тому +6

      @@terrycrews1760 lol it means that too but ice cream sprinkles

    • @Puffpuffcass
      @Puffpuffcass 4 роки тому +6

      In Maryland we call them jimmies as well. Well tbh only the black sprinkles are called jimmies.

    • @majidminhas8954
      @majidminhas8954 4 роки тому +1

      @@Puffpuffcass im from baltimore, never heard of it.

    • @JonLeeCon
      @JonLeeCon 4 роки тому

      We have an ice cream place in my town in MD called Jimmy Cone, so we call the sprinkles jimmies

  • @KcGil4300
    @KcGil4300 4 роки тому +15

    I’m watching this in an ER waiting room and had to stop because i couldn’t control my laughing

  • @theodoroskalopedis
    @theodoroskalopedis 4 роки тому +65

    Chris - ill never let go
    Chris one mine later - i gotta learn to let go.

  • @CLAWZGALAW
    @CLAWZGALAW 4 роки тому +49

    “DIABETREES!!!” 🤣😭💀💀💀💀💀💀

    • @morellapoe2814
      @morellapoe2814 17 днів тому

      This guy had no R balance in is life. 😂

  • @bdsaints1986
    @bdsaints1986 4 роки тому +263

    I'm just happy someone pronounced "espresso" correctly for once!

  • @NowImGonnaStarve
    @NowImGonnaStarve 4 роки тому +12

    Cuzzy cracked this one open and cleaned it out. Love it babe!

  • @EJofLA
    @EJofLA 4 роки тому +11

    Funny, warm and humble- what a sweet set!

  • @QueenSince
    @QueenSince 4 роки тому +235

    Still waiting for his dad to get on the podcast 😂

  • @yordygarcia1242
    @yordygarcia1242 3 роки тому +21

    haha its funnier when you realize he was a physical therapist

  • @anthonyzullo
    @anthonyzullo 4 роки тому +181

    Chrissy D baby! Keeping it tucked!

    • @s36430
      @s36430 4 роки тому +9

      Best transgender comedian🙌🙌

    • @bruin1771
      @bruin1771 4 роки тому +1

      FF

    • @hotstep777
      @hotstep777 4 роки тому +1

      @@s36430 😂😂😂

    • @terrycrews1760
      @terrycrews1760 4 роки тому +2

      Ante Radić ??? What? Are you serious?

    • @aardlord
      @aardlord 3 роки тому

      🕺

  • @fanOmry
    @fanOmry 4 роки тому +173

    Why does every time I hear his bits, I want to sit him down for homemade pizza, pastries and Coffee/Cocoa...
    And let him cry on my shoulder untill he's better.
    It will ruin the act.

    • @terrycrews1760
      @terrycrews1760 4 роки тому +5

      fanOmry I think it’s bc you realize he needs a therapist sitting across from him and not an audience lol

    • @fanOmry
      @fanOmry 4 роки тому

      @@terrycrews1760 true

    • @justindillon4634
      @justindillon4634 4 роки тому

      Cause you’re an FF it is what it is kid

  • @ThePierreduski
    @ThePierreduski 3 роки тому +11

    Hahaha he’s clearly a physical therapist, I loved the PT jokes.

  • @domzdome9723
    @domzdome9723 4 роки тому +12

    I love how chrissy slow his pace a little bit for this special. Props to chrissy and i love history hyenas.

  • @cesg7749
    @cesg7749 4 роки тому +17

    LOVE this guy! Hilarious

  • @ckcx918
    @ckcx918 4 роки тому +25

    Just finished a bowl of pistachio ice cream as I started watching this 💀

  • @Neenaross214
    @Neenaross214 2 роки тому +2

    The first 20 seconds and I’m dying laughing!!!!! Love this guy

  • @lostlang
    @lostlang 4 роки тому +151

    My friend told me I look like this guy so I came to check him out and then he just insulted his own looks for the first 2 minutes 😐
    Update: I also love pistachio ice cream

    • @bbutler14gmail
      @bbutler14gmail 4 роки тому +2

      Jack Langborg Send me a pic and I”ll be the judge. 😉Also he was being modest. The mans cute and funny 🤷🏽‍♀️

    • @lostlang
      @lostlang 4 роки тому

      @@bbutler14gmail id agree but don't think I look much like him 😂

    • @bbutler14gmail
      @bbutler14gmail 4 роки тому +2

      Jack Langborg If your friend that said that is a female, shes proly right. We’re pretty good about seeing similarities like that. Also your proly at least mildly funny too cause your watching standup

    • @lostlang
      @lostlang 4 роки тому +2

      @@bbutler14gmail well she's a woman so hell ya I'll take it

    • @incican7089
      @incican7089 4 роки тому

      It was actually the kid that liked pistachio ice cream

  • @TheSnowReport28
    @TheSnowReport28 4 роки тому +45

    Pistachio was my fave ice cream as a kid too 😂

    • @tvs9978
      @tvs9978 4 роки тому +5

      Me too. Guess we were weird

    • @daedum3177
      @daedum3177 4 роки тому +3

      Same

    • @thewhat531
      @thewhat531 4 роки тому +2

      Pistachio crew in the house

    • @wobbe6624
      @wobbe6624 4 роки тому +2

      Same..never got an icecream without atleast 1 scoop of pistachio

    • @jillianleda6732
      @jillianleda6732 4 роки тому +1

      That and mint 💚😍💚 Anything green lol and I loved blue drinks 😂😂😂

  • @troythompson2
    @troythompson2 4 роки тому +16

    The delivery on this

  • @simplybookish1277
    @simplybookish1277 4 роки тому +42

    Pinot Grigio wine and Michael Buble... sounds like my normal life now 🤷🏽‍♀️😂

  • @lolakensington855
    @lolakensington855 Рік тому +1

    I laughed until I cried! "The cartridge in my knee" killed me.

  • @jenniferbates2811
    @jenniferbates2811 4 роки тому +17

    I live in Rhode Island and we say " jimmies" instead of chocolate sprinkles. We don't pronounce our R's either!

  • @margicates553
    @margicates553 4 роки тому +57

    I almost didn’t click on the thumbnail, because of his haircut!😆

  • @ArdelleVision
    @ArdelleVision 4 роки тому +56

    Getting inspired to do some standup (bucket list goals)

    • @extrasmalldoll654
      @extrasmalldoll654 4 роки тому +9

      Don't.

    • @onjofilms
      @onjofilms 4 роки тому +10

      You can do it. If you have a good set, write it out over time. You got it girl. It's all about timing.

    • @ArdelleVision
      @ArdelleVision 4 роки тому +6

      onjoFilms I agree. I started practicing and writing some ideas out last night. I realize it’ll need to be worked out. I took a stand up comedy course a couple years ago and trying to remember what I learned

    • @bruin1771
      @bruin1771 4 роки тому +4

      Do it

    • @freddyfootstomps6557
      @freddyfootstomps6557 4 роки тому +5

      You’re probably going to suck. Every professional comedian says that when they started they were terrible. Really a skill that you have to push through and fail a lot

  • @MAV-xq1ch
    @MAV-xq1ch 3 роки тому +1

    He's my NY/NJ soul mate. Hes the only one that gets me.

  • @thegodofpez
    @thegodofpez 2 роки тому +3

    This guy is so underrated. 👏👏👏

    • @samanthab1923
      @samanthab1923 2 роки тому

      When you first hear him it’s funny but after a while if you follow him onto other podcasts, he repeats himself & too much with the gay voice, Chrissy this or that. It’s his real persona that execs don’t like. Hyper

  • @Sugarskulls_forever
    @Sugarskulls_forever 4 роки тому +4

    Love this dude!

  • @kristennicole5080
    @kristennicole5080 4 роки тому +9

    “pistache” hahahahahaha

  • @RantTherapist
    @RantTherapist 3 роки тому +3

    LMAO. I like his energy. Great comedian.

  • @DR053
    @DR053 3 роки тому +6

    “Let me see your divorce papers. When was your last colonoscopy? What have you been through, kid?!”

  • @novanironstine6359
    @novanironstine6359 4 роки тому +16

    Chris has the best material😂😂 you just wanna listen to him for hours. Hope he never loses that. Funny funny guy👏👏

  • @mattleonard5268
    @mattleonard5268 4 роки тому +17

    I’m a straight man but he’s a very handsome guy. Like a less famous Tom Brady.

  • @cheyenneschultz9880
    @cheyenneschultz9880 4 роки тому +30

    Not gunna lie, thought when he said the rotary cuff in your shoulder was not the word, I was thinking it was rotisery 🤷‍♀️😂

  • @mitchiegotmovesy7635
    @mitchiegotmovesy7635 4 роки тому +6

    6:19 yeah I totally forgot it was rotator

  • @isaacchavez6297
    @isaacchavez6297 4 роки тому +20

    Cashier: “Pistachio flavor? Who the hell do you think you are you little punk. Freakin poser”

  • @anakapoesie9720
    @anakapoesie9720 4 роки тому +15

    Take a shot everytime he says "you know" 😂

    • @silversagi
      @silversagi 2 роки тому +1

      Thanks, now that’s all I focus on 🤣🤣🤣

  • @alexisweishaar9038
    @alexisweishaar9038 4 роки тому +3

    I absolutely lost it at Grogle.Crom

  • @brandydt30
    @brandydt30 3 роки тому +1

    Sprinks lol 😂😂

  • @TheMummyCats
    @TheMummyCats 2 роки тому

    My grandpa started calling Chicago "Chi-cargo" ... this hits close to home

  • @globetrekker86
    @globetrekker86 4 роки тому +17

    “I got diabetres” 😂

  • @sap9378
    @sap9378 2 роки тому

    The cartridge 😭😂😂😂

  • @missevelynr
    @missevelynr 2 роки тому

    5:49 underrated, “eucalyptus” had me wheezing 🐨

  • @sarikatimmi
    @sarikatimmi 4 роки тому

    chris and theo together are the besttt

  • @RobstaBerkeley21
    @RobstaBerkeley21 3 роки тому +1

    He got me on the rotary cuff lmao

  • @liny2sd
    @liny2sd 4 роки тому +5

    Italian kids dig pistachio ice cream. It was part of the regular rotation of ice cream flavors in my household with an Italian mother.

  • @Dali_Chan22
    @Dali_Chan22 4 роки тому +1

    I need more of this guy!

  • @trex1448
    @trex1448 3 роки тому +1

    I live surrounded by this guy's parents and grandparents in Queens. It's aggro hell but the food is amazing.

  • @somedudewithoutamustache
    @somedudewithoutamustache 4 роки тому +3

    Loooove this dude haha

  • @hunterhatch7738
    @hunterhatch7738 2 роки тому +1

    "I know I look like one of though d-bag frat boys"
    Starts telling his jokes:
    Me.... yeah you don't look like one you are one🤣

  • @GibbsBro
    @GibbsBro 4 роки тому +1

    I FUCKING love Duck Tales

  • @tn15_
    @tn15_ 4 роки тому +14

    Turn on subtitles and you'll see there was one last punchline at 7:16

  • @psychosoma5049
    @psychosoma5049 3 роки тому

    He is perfection

  • @ericsummann2184
    @ericsummann2184 4 роки тому +64

    History hyenas podcast for more of this guy

  • @evam6566
    @evam6566 4 роки тому +3

    I love the hair

  • @silviocifuentes4905
    @silviocifuentes4905 4 роки тому

    The rotary cup got meeeeeee hahaha

  • @Lorne1218
    @Lorne1218 3 роки тому

    SENSATIONAL

  • @kimberlyaddis6194
    @kimberlyaddis6194 2 роки тому

    He's hilarious!

  • @anony1596
    @anony1596 2 роки тому

    The way I screamed within the first 17 seconds yooo 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 bc it's true 🤣🤣🤣🤣 I literally thought some variation of that as i clicked on the thumbnail

  • @Nobodyhome630
    @Nobodyhome630 2 роки тому

    “Sprinks” LoL

  • @benithomas545
    @benithomas545 2 роки тому +1

    This guy is funny 😄

  • @leec439
    @leec439 4 роки тому

    Yes!! More Chris

  • @pleasantsville
    @pleasantsville 2 роки тому

    First time I’ve heard this guy. He’s funny!

  • @Z33_Cowboy
    @Z33_Cowboy 2 роки тому

    I love this guy 😂😂😂

  • @bobbyramblewood1047
    @bobbyramblewood1047 4 роки тому +6

    My mom can randomly get heavy with the "er's"
    Soder instead of soda
    Pizzer- pizza
    Seger- Sega (genesis)
    And yet...
    Instead of Doctor she says doctah
    Loser- loosah
    Charger- chargah
    Dollar= dalah
    Supposed to= sapostah OR subposter, depending on how wound up she is that day.
    Love ya mom❤️😭

  • @siannamaddy6590
    @siannamaddy6590 4 роки тому +3

    He didn't have to call everyone out about the rotary cuff.. Lolol

  • @hackshall
    @hackshall 4 роки тому

    I love the Chris Destefano fonts in the background

  • @Stevebaby123
    @Stevebaby123 4 роки тому

    Love this guy.

  • @buddy77587
    @buddy77587 4 роки тому +1

    I love you Chris

  • @dalibofurnell
    @dalibofurnell 2 роки тому

    Brilliant 👌

  • @NilanjanaMannaraprayil
    @NilanjanaMannaraprayil 4 роки тому +1

    SPRINKS

  • @twodogsandaperson
    @twodogsandaperson 4 роки тому +1

    Wehave to protect him at all costs

  • @diegosanchez6305
    @diegosanchez6305 2 роки тому

    0:55 exactly the moment he knew he had the crowd already

  • @teddybearington3
    @teddybearington3 2 роки тому

    He got me on rotary 😂😳☺️💕

  • @scottyp2505
    @scottyp2505 2 роки тому +1

    My mom does that with the r’s and a’s lol

  • @tracihendrix5761
    @tracihendrix5761 3 роки тому

    I have this saved under my faves!! 🤣😂

  • @jacktorrence9881
    @jacktorrence9881 4 роки тому +2

    1:19 situation with the mother

  • @will6176
    @will6176 3 роки тому

    Thought before clicking this: "Hmmm, this Chris Distefano guy, I've seen him around on different podcasts, never listened to him but he seems like some Frat Dude Beer Pong Chad guy, but I'll check his comedy out"
    first 30 seconds: oh, wow. nice. I'm in.