You are contagious | Vanessa Van Edwards | TEDxLondon
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- Опубліковано 21 лис 2024
- Vanessa reveals that our behaviour, from hand gestures to how we say 'hello', changes the way others perceive our confidence,
Vanessa Van Edwards is an interpersonal intelligence expert and public speaker. Her behaviour research lab ‘The Science of People’ has been featured in Fast Company, Inc, Men’s Health, Forbes, and on Fox News. She is a monthly columnist for Entrepreneur; the leading instructor in people skills on Udemy and CreativeLive; and has led training sessions at a number of Fortune 500 companies around the world. She lives in Portland, Oregon.
This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at www.ted.com/tedx
That's my niece!!!! Uncle is sooooo proud!
yes, she is amazing!
Can I use SS?
You have a reeeeeeaaallyyyyy cute niece...
Dont look at me Vanessa..look at him! Im ur uncle! U remember that?
Wow... I find it mindblowing that she's related to one of the pioneers of pick up. Lovely.
"Anxiety and excitement are very similar emotions, the only difference is the mindset" this is gold ❤️
Right!? I thought, “wow” I’ve never heard that perspective before. I love it
yes right? fascinating :-)
Why is this gold? How can I apply that fact to improve my life?
@@beppobarrendero74 You can try to start changing your mindset)))
I totally agree with you. Great message 🥰🥰❤❤
instead of:
1. what do you do?
2. where are you from?
3. how are you?
try:
1. working on anything exciting these days?
2. have any vacations coming up?
3. anything good happen today.
this is gold.
I'm trying that it sound effective and it really might work
instead of:
1. What do you do?
2. Where are you from?
3. How are you?
try:
1. How do you do?
2. What are you from?
3. Where are you?
This is going to get a lot of people around you nervous and concerned, unless you talk in a very hippie/hipster sort of way. But if your smooth on the first one, sound genuinely perplexed mixed with time-constrained on the second, and scream the last one whilst looking them dead in the eyes then you've hit maximum effect!
or try:
1. Do you do what?
2. Are you from where?
3. You are how?
If a guy at a party approached me for the first time with one of these sentences I would think he is being weird. If a girl did so, I'd think she's hitting on me
Unless the answer is "no" to all three of those questions.
stop taking her fire, k?
she's basically teaching everyone how to do ted talk the most effective way on stage. she's amazing!
Thank you so much!
"you are contagious",the whole of 2020 and 2021 summed up.
lol
Completely remembered why I used to be so confident. I was so much fun! I was unpredictable, funny, goofy and knew it. Anymore, I'm thinking my losses have stolen those things and that's why I'm alone so much. I need to remember myself and be more positive. Thanks for this Vanessa!
I relate to this so hard.
Shannon Feyhl the thing is, we can't fake happiness
@@JELAJAHSEMESTA-u2h Oh but you can... I did it for years with my ex! 🤣
Amanda Burkhart did it work?
@@JELAJAHSEMESTA-u2h Haha, it did until it didn't. 😉
I really hate it when someone politely asks you a question and you can tell by their dead eyes and posture they really don't care what the answer is, even before you've started speaking.
Jay, yes, it is like shaking hands with someone and they look at someone else while they are shaking your hand. This happened to me once and I kicked the person in the shin, he looked at me right quick after that. Another one that gets me going is if someone asks you how you are and you say "not that well" and they distractedly say "that's great". Since that happened to me I always ask back if they are really interested in hearing the full story. That usually makes them stop and think as well.
They may have their own insecurities. The fact that they are trying to be nice, you have to appreciate. People need to stop being judgemental towards each other.
Why do you think they don't care? Maybe they are anxious to talk or ask you because you are not welcoming?
@@Endrance450 but that's so meaningless if you want to say hello more personally then mean it with your gestures or tone of your voice. I still can't get used to being asked how I am and consider it as a "hello"
J B Hehe me😏 I mostly ask things for the purpose of asking something😄😄
psychology is soooo interesting and amazingly useful.
thanks me to
☺ Thank you.
@Chris Jones how is it often wrong? genuinely curious
@Chris Jones I'm genuinely interested in your opinions on this as I'm a high school humanities student. What kinds of ideas or opportunities or information or anything do you think are worth discovering and exploring within the broad field?
omg yesss❤️
This woman's clarity kills me!
Her words are so clear..
You know what else is clear?
@@kuwandak what? 😂
Thank you ❤
Did she just teach me PEOPLE skills in 3 simple ways? OMG!!! I am going to start asking those questions!!!!!
❤😍
@@ScienceOfPeopletanks a lot ❤
🎉❤🎉
Her presence already made me excited. Her aura her spirit and her enthusiasm, they're definitely contagious. And for those looking for going viral kind of thing, what matters is she did her best and you could see it. Real life events don't look for statistical figures but more on meaningful impact. Love her already.
she has amazing comedic timing
Yeah I liked her presentation but I felt like she was slightly over-exaggerating at times. Which is something a lot of Ted talkers do
Agree much bang bangability
Agreed
❤️
Totally random, but she is killing this dress. She looks great!
ok good, it wasnt just me
Honestly was very hard to listen to her when I glanced at the video. Very distracting 😍
You mean tearing it apart?
Meh, I thought the vest was on point..
Definitely!
She’s awesome. The “looking at nothing” study was hilarious. I’m going to try that.
Yeah it's better to study the others things
@@vues-cf7zl yusuhaa i
I saw an old movie where one person looked to the sky and he attracted a multitude of people doing the same thing. They had no idea what they were looking for but they just following his actions.
I'm surprised that people aren't familiar with this. When I was a child (late 1960s), my father related a story about how he was in town and decided to see if he could get other people to do something, just because he was. In front of a movie theater, just as people were leaving, he looked intently at a point in the sky. Soon, a whole crowd began looking. He said that after enough people were looking, he stopped and walked a short way, so he could watch and listen. Humorously enough, eventually someone asked "what are we looking at?" There were a number of responses, that included "an airplane," and someone even mentioned that a man was staring into the sky and they looked, hoping to see what had caught his attention. As a result, I have repeated this experiment and it's always a lot of fun!
@@1TheShawnster Agree! as a teen in the early 70's a group of us band geeks would do this in downtown Milwaukee just to see what would happen. Always brought a smile to us but most of the time when someone would ask what we were all looking at, we'd say 'nothing, just stopping to enjoy the sky'. They would smile and walk away. Great feeling!
Takeaway: open hands, dopamine-worthy conversation and authentic smile makes your more memorable and viral for sure..☺️
Key points: use more hand gestures, ask more dopamine worthy questions, make authentic smiles and never pick up the phone in a bad mood.
"We are in control of how we feel and what we want to spread." THANK YOU FOR SHARING!
I saw her in real life before she released her book. She's has a very genuine personality.
But does she? Or did she just infect you into thinking that?
psychology is soooo interesting and amazingly useful.
Really? You are so lucky. I hope I can meet with her
I think Vanessa Van Edwards is one of the best TED speakers. The content is great for sure, but as far as delivery and confidence, I haven't seen better. She is a pleasure to listen and watch.
She is really great person. She is my idol
Brené Brown is my #1, but this lady is a super close second! She’s fabulous!
Have you seen simón sinek? He's muy number 1 still
3:00
4:04
D fake
@@gonzaloenrique8741 He is really awesome too. Great choice!
I’ve never seen anyone that looked and presented themselves so genuine that not once did I feel a negative or an uncomfortable emotion while watching this!! I REALLY like her energy:)
Me too. She is perfect
she is positive and charming
Guys, while reading the comments you will notice something : There's no hateful comments. At all. And I know it because I've read them all. So this is true : This lady has increased our dopamine, we all feel happy and excited ! Let's show this to the whole world 😉💪🏻
True
Is it normal that I kept smiling throughout this TED Talk. This is amazing stuff to learn.
Such an entertaining and informative talk! My takeaways:
- our emotions are contagious, so others will pick up on how we feel
- facial expressions + body language can be THE TRIGGER for your emotional reality, instead of just vice versa!
- frame dialogue/questions in terms of positive words instead of negative or empty ones.
- all this makes me realize, I need to do power poses + affirmations more!
Excellent takeaways! I'm so glad you enjoyed ❤
My wife sent me this, and she got it from a podcast referral, and I have to admit... this really explains a lot for me. Man, it's time to get to work! Waiting for a part 2 or book or more in-depth information. Appreciate it over all and best wishes
So glad this was really helpful for you! 🙏🏻
"If we show up to events we are ambivalent about, interact with people we don't really like, we become less memorable." This sentence will stay with me. Exceptionally good talk.
This goes to the top ted talks no doubt, Vanessa you shook the dust out of our heads in an unique way, thank u
Thank you ❤
This talk is literally a gift to humanity
It makes sense, like when me or my friends are laughing and smiling, somehow everyone just gets into the mood and we’re all happy and giggling, even when we dunno what’s happening.
Yeah also she looks shy anything or no
Ccxx
Ccxxx
Love that final line Vanessa - we are in control of how we feel and what we want to spread. Really locks into the internal locus of control in a way that is explainable :)
Awkward girl blossomed into a brilliant, beautiful, sincere lady 😉
And in ten years will meet the Wall.
Bob Bobb oh Bob, bad Bob what have they done to, for you to be so cynical? Thankfully your unhappyness is not contagious.
@@bobbobb2322 lmfao
I initially read "sincere lady" as "science lady" and hey it's technically true
Pokémon
You can tell that Vanessa Van Edwards practices what she preaches. She is a very dynamic speaker and engages then captivates you immediately to the end of her speech/message. Mahalos Vanessa!
Whenever I search for any ted talk .I just choose one and then play it.What keeps me listen to that ted talk is just the speech.I mean to say that how clearly the idea has been delivered by a ted talker interest me to listen to the whole talk without even looking at the person talking.
she's so beautiful and charismatic
fact
"I'm excited" too! Great talk! Congratulations. I'm now listening to your audiobook and am getting so much of it. Big fan!
Sebastián Lora which audiobook? :)
Who cares 😋
I loved it and on the hunt for more from you Vanessa. Super inspired and excited 😊Best TED talk ever!!!
@@olashalaby5082 Hiii how are you??
Sebastián Lora I have the book (not audio)!
I love her energy! It is contagious! That’s what make this talk more exciting to watch!
True 😊😊
She is definitely a good speaker. We Italians have been using hand gestures for centuries along with facial expressions. :))
“The only difference between nervousness and excitement is the mindset.”
I pushed myself to try believing in this perspective and can personally attest that my perspective has slowly but surely changed. Now when the adrenaline kicks in, my mind makes note that it is indeed excitement!
This is hands down my favourite Ted talk and I've watched a lot. I use facts from this to start conversations and it's honestly changed how I view and interact with people. Amazing 👏
I’m so happy to hear this! Thanks for watching 🙏🏻
I've become a memorable communicator over the years and do all the things mentioned in this talk. Love the research to back up what I do. Thank you.
My friend says that she can just feel it when im in a room without even seeing me because its just full of joy and positivity - bruh i thought she was going mad: now i dont wow
That's legit the best quality to have! Kudos to you!
The end where everyone’s yells “I’m exited”, I felt that!!!
This might be one of the best TED talks I've watched so far
That means so much to me! Thank you! 💛💛
Vanessa has a soft voice. It was such a pleasure to hear her. She is contagious. Congratulations! 👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏
So proud of you Vanessa! What a year you're having! Another amazing CreativeLive, a best selling book, and a perfectly delivered (and informative, funny, and inspiring) TEDX talk! You continue to inspire and "infect" us with your work! Keep it up! ❤️Your fan from Key West!
I recently met my thesis mentor and I gave her this compliment that her energy is contagious because she is really exciting architect and a great mentor!!😍
she speaks out Gold and Diamond..Vanessa Edwards , you're the best at this.
Right after I listened to your talk a moment ago, I received a phone call from someone I had some tensions with earlier today. So, I did exactly what you recommended. I made my voice gently cheerful. I told him I liked his shirt, which I truly meant, and continued with some additional sincere small talk. The tensions disappeared and we left the conversations smiling. I’m certain my tone of voice at the onset of the conversation set the tone for the positive. Fun to have the experience right after your talk. Thanks Vanessa!
One of the best TED talks I've seen in a long while. Thank you UA-cam algorithm and thank you Vanessa!
*puts hand on chest* I truly love your work Vanessa! You're an inspiration to *waves hands in opposite direction* millions of people around the world!
Hector Mayoral hey listen I know I’m a year late but...
Why are you touching her chest?!🤔
lol I only realized I listened to her audiobook in the middle of the talk. She's hypnotizing when you actually see her.
Saying "I am excited" does work. Every show I did after saying that was that much more successful! Self talk is real yall! Use it
Most of the time when I do watch video to learn new things...it helps to improve my self. But here... absolututley next level which is hit me like, this is what I was looking for.....Great Speech...wow...loved it. Vanessa so perfect speaker for me at time of writing.
16:54 Is a huge moment in this talk; a belief I decoded on my own, simply reframing your mindset can shift, like a panoramic camera, the scope of possibility for one who is faced with a difficult decision.
Excitement with comfortable acceptance of un-intended failure and full openness to learn.
"I am excited !" Such a great advice when I am feeling nervous about upcoming presentation. Awesome!
I absolutely love all her work, research and the way she shares it with the world. Such an inspiring woman.
I love this woman, she’s so beautiful, not just her looks but her confidence and personality. She’s so knowledgeable and I love her videos, they really do help💗
OMG. This is literally the first TED Talk I have ever seen that doesn't end with "Thank You"😱! I have been waiting for this moment forever!
I absolutely love how she takes common sense things we don’t really even realize is right in front of our face. And I’ve just started watching her videos and it led me here. Love her!!!
I absolutely loved it! I have learned so much from Vanessa over the years!
You're so welcome!
Terrence Burton &
This explains the "aura" thing. People with good aura, are more attractive and more pleasant to keep close. While people with bad aura (emotions, attitude) are often labeled as toxic people that drain the energy out of you. I have finally learned to spot them and i am trying for quite some time now, to avoid them. Also i am trying to become more positive myself.
When I was 25, my bff the day he suddenly got into. Wreck & later passed told me that I was "contagious" ...it never left my mind...I felt understood yet confused. Best thing I have ever been called! He was amazing.
That opening line was LEGENDARY!!
Wow, thank you so much!!
So amazing! A conglomerate of wonderful social psychological research in a coherent, well flowing, and entertaining delivery. Love love love this!
Thank you so much for the insight! I never realized some of these tactics. Some of them I've employed throughout my years working customer service, without realizing. Such as asking people if they have any fun or exciting plans. Or asking them to tell me about something they've been really passionate about. I will definitely employ more of these strategies and try to be contagious to my coworkers.
I am preparing for my final interview, and I feel nervous about it. But I would rather say, I am excited! Thank you Vanessa! You rock!
Did you get the job?
Well did uuu
Changed my life! Henceforward, I will be hilarious, excited, funny, energetic, and charismatic. I want to change my life as well as others' life for good.
Love to hear this!! 🙌
This has to be one of THE best Ted talks ever! 🙏
Absolutely wonderful!!! I've been teaching business etiquette and social skills for years and this is just the information that we all need. Thank you!
Exciting, exhilarating and encouraging expressions that serve as an elixir to human spirit. Thanks Vanessa.
Vanessa, this is such a memorable TED talk. Thank you for equipping me with a set of skills that I will use, for the good of all, the rest of my life ❤
It’s my absolute pleasure ❤️ thank you for being on this journey with me!
She got us a the End... She Said "You Rocked it" and instantly, we are thinking that SHE rocked it. THANK YOU for your lesson!
My sister started waiting tables at a restaurant that drew people from three and four hours away. People with money. She started comparing her tips with others and saw she was not getting near the tips. My dad managed this restaurant and tourist/history demonstration center. He was in the restaurant only an hour or so each day. After a week my sister complained. My dad started observing her and after a couple hours he pulled her aside and said, SMILE WHEN YOU ARE AT THE TABLE... she didn't agree that week. He talked to her on the weekend and convinced her to truly smile and test it for a week. She almost tripled her tips.
Hey! What could be more contagious than this tedtalk? Life changing! I'M EXCITED!!!!!!
you need to work on your english, English has much less excitement in it.
@@samurilip Are you trying to say English is a less-excitement
Language?🤔 I'm confused.
Omg, this video has changed the way I perceive people and I am very much sure that its going to be very much helpful. "I am Excited". Great talk and lucky i am that i found this one. You Rock Vanessa. Many Congratulations to you and your team. I have been watching your videos on science of people and now following you on UA-cam so can watch all your exciting videos. Looking forward to have some great learning.
This woman is a genius
Yeah, and drop-dead gorgeous ; )
She's absolutely phenomenal, specially what she said at the end. You rockTED a truly astounding woman.
She's indeed contagious to teach us about the matter.
Great job, Vanessa! I always enjoy listening to you and your research.
Hey, thanks a lot. Looking forward for more such videos. My friend said I had a drastic change in my voice and and sounded more confident and all that was by listening to this one video. It means a lot to me. I'm very grateful. Wish luck and happiness
One of the more better ted talks I've seen. A lot of information that we don't really take into consideration that shape not just our day but the day of others.
I’ve been told you can hear my smile on the phone. I was asked one time if my happiness was real and I said yes!
She is fabulous. I loved her from the very first sentence. "Recovering awkward person" is hilarious!
If you are Italian then you don't have to think about how to talk with your hands 🖐🙌
Yeah but I don't think that
Hi Vanessa! I'm so grateful for the material you share. I am an ESL teacher and have used several of your videos to teach my students not only verbal English but other communication mediums as well. Truly great work and best of luck on your continued success! Teacher Lisa :-)
Very interesting. That's an amazing experiment. Thanks. Patterns are the key to everything.
Amazing! She gave everything and taught people how to do a TedTalk. She’s amazing! 😂 It never get old.
She never failed to show excitement from start to finish of her talk...that's why I was able to completely watched her TED talk. Nice one!!😊
What a cool talk, love how everything she said came together at the end!
Amazing! Vanessa does an excellent work and it's easy to see that she uses what research! Congratulations!
You're the best Vanessa! Have become your fan in such a short time! You're very inspirational. And you rock 😊
You are itself contagious.
Now, we all need to be contagious and spread positivity and happiness among mankind.
I love the implications of this on service providers. Their ability to provide a service, to fulfill their role and experience job satisfaction, is reflected in their presence with those seeking their service.
Excellent insight. Thank you for your hard work and dedication to your field.
I love Vanessa! I really felt the energy and I enjoyed the talk very much.
"Anxiety and excitement are very similar emotions".
Nice one:)!
One of the best talks to better understand delivery keys for public speaking.
Low-key felt goosebump when she said she spend hours on reaserching viral ted talk now she is on a ted talk with 4 million views
On one hand, this is really cool information, and it'll be cool to hear what else they find out!
On the other, I'm admittedly scared of how this information might be twisted and used as a club for people who have legitimate reasons they're not happy.
I know that multiple people, relatives, judges, (non-psych) doctors, told me stuff like "You just need to be more positive! Chin up! You're too young to be depressed!" and.....if you're chemically depressed, that can be utterly useless. If you're in chronic pain, that's useless. If you're in a severely abusive situation and can't leave, that's useless. And I was all of those. Chemically depressed, chronically ill and in pain, while the family members I relied on abused and gaslighted me. And remembering how they treated any science that (could be twisted to look like) it agreed with them, it was used often as a reason why being depressed was my own fault, with all that includes. And it was only until I was able to escape with a friend to support me, that I was able to get real treatment, and get enough mental pressure off my brain that I could be actually happy.
I guess I just wish she'd included something about the limitations of this.
When they said ‘I’m excited’ at the end I actually smiled genuinely
I just gotta say you're my role model, I admire you so so much. Keep the good work. Thank you for the huge inspiration.
💞
I love this woman! She's the best
Thank you 😍
She is a good body language traineer in english speaking country.i appreciate her technique how to start conversation with someone