Thinking about the end result was something I recently noticed I wasn’t doing. I already do a lot of the other things to get through it once I get started. Having a vision for the end result helps get started and gives me ideas of what to start with.
Good to pair something positive to the task to get you going. I also do things in small steps. Like one day I'll clean half the kitchen. I will make sure I say to self that I accomplished something.
I'm trying to think about the end result, and the task isn't even that hard for me, I have just cannot do it. It's like there's a block for me. I did like the top about body doubling. I may try to find someone to hold me accountable until I get my task done. Thanks!
Some people simply can't visualize. Try mind mapping or writing a story that include the end result. Definitely body double though. It's really helpful.
Thank you so much for this very succinct video, I got a good few nuggets of wisdom there and I feel better about getting on with a task that I have been trying to get started for 2 months or more! Very interesting and most helpful is the part about noticing what you are thinking about the task and getting those negative thoughts out of your head and onto paper. Much love and gratitude from the UK 🇬🇧
I'm so glad! Yes, being honest about what we're thinking is so important. It's the first key to solving the problem, which is awareness. I tell my clients there are 3 stages. 1. You will become aware of what you are thinking. 2. You will judge yourself for thinking it. 3. You will accept it as part of who you are, and that is where true change steps in.
Good for you! I remember the days of the doom pile of laundry on the couch. I did this for years. What is a way you can change your system so this doesn't happen? Even if it slows down your laundry process. Slower and available is better than clean and in the pile. Do you have ideas?
I struggle to initiate ANY task, even ones that are super easy that I really want to do. Rewards aren't engaging or helpful, I'm not motivated by them and I don't get anything out of them. Breaking tasks down just makes the situation worse. I'm not thinking anything about the task except that I want or need to do it. Do you have any other tips?
I am exactly the same! I can't do anything usually, even though I don't feel depressed due to my antidepressants, and rewards aren't motivating. I don't get any pleasure from completing a task so I have no internal motivation.
This has no comments yet, so I will leave one! Thank you for this video, it's very short but has good tips and I will try to send it to my ADHD friends who struggle with even watching a video about ADHD strategies - I think they might be able to take time to watch this at least! I will also try my best to learn to do tasks myself, because I also have ADHD myself.
First, your brain works. As a coach I obligate myself to suggest you watch the language you are using about yourself. Even the small stuff we say matters. And yes you need a system of thinking and planning that works for you. I have an ADHD Self Coaching course coming that will be free that I think would be really useful to you. All that said I get what you are saying. It can be frustrating but it can also get better. Stay positive. You have got this!
It absolutely can! I caution my clients to take as little time planning as possible because creating the big beautiful plan is a hit of dopamine itself. Then we taken so much energy making the plan we don't execute and feel bad about it.
Have you heard of lack of task initiation on something you enjoy doing or something that's not fun like going to the movies but still gives you dopamine and not much negative thoughts?
Oh absolutely yes! I do that all the time. There is something I know will be fun or I'll really enjoy that I can procrastinate on if I'm not careful. The same rules apply. I wonder if part of what you are describing is also all the work it takes to get to the thing. That can be daunting if we don't have our lives and minds organized.
@@learntothrivewithadhd I don't know if it's also from my surgery and seizures. If I'm sitting at a desk, ready to work, cleared all distractions, on a task I want to do, and no racing thoughts for some reason I have to "push" myself to start the task. I don't know if that's ADHD compared to procrastination where distractions and other dopamine highs keep you from doing the task. I heard the former experienced in people who had TBI. But I'm trying to find a therapist who can help me with it.
@@PatientPerspective that would be interesting to look into. Also something I tell my clients when we are working on time management is you are almost never going to want to do the thing you planned to do. Setting up that expectation can be so helpful in getting past the upset of not wanting to get started. And it's mostly true and it normalizes the negative emotion around doing the thing.
I have a question. I force myself to do things sometimes and when I'm not I try to push my buttons to do things like watching motivational videos, trying to rest with no sound; doing nothing these things help me. The things you mentioned and things I do like pushing my buttons can keep me like around 5 to 8 days, then my mind just stops I need something very simulating like 3-4 days laying down scrolling, reading books, going for walks etc. and due to this I failed many lessons. I used to be worse like I needed a break day if I studied 2 days in a row and felt very tired. I improved trying hard. But I seem to not progress any further and my improvement stopped. After 5-8 days studying I have to have a 3-4 days long break is kind of pulling me down. So my question is how do I keep using the methods you mentioned continuously? How can I improve further? I don't know what to do about this and I'm in a heavy engineering course in college so I have to keep pushing regularly
It's hard to say for sure without asking you more questions but it sounds like you are pushing yourself too hard on the days you are on and then having to rest and rejuvenate. What about creating a day that has your responsibilities handled plus rest and rejuvenation?
This happens so often-we get caught up in countless other "useful" tasks instead of focusing on what's truly urgent. For example, you intend to grade student essays but end up washing dishes, watching motivational videos, replying to emails, or even cleaning a room that's been messy for months. Twelve hours later, the essays remain untouched... 😮😢 We know these tasks need to get done eventually, but somehow, when there’s something more pressing, these activities suddenly seem incredibly important.
I have a couple clients have are currently professors and they do. not. like. grading essays. It takes a long time. You want to leave a thoughtful or helpful comment. And it can be boring. All setting you up to not want to do it. Everything you describe is faster and more rewarding even if you don't want to do those things either? Except the room. I bet there is high reward but that probably took a while. I would break the task up. I'll do X amount of essays then do the dishes or go for a walk then do X amount of essays and give yourself time. Set up the expectation they don't get them back for a week for example.
Yes! I heard this call procrastitivity the other day. Procrastinating with other activities that seem useful or important. Remind yourself you can do that later. Perhaps give it a specific day and time and get back to the thing you know you should do.
@@learntothrivewithadhd no im really not kidding LOL. for example i'd find a podcast, then i'll work for about 2-5 minutes, then try to find another podcast because it got "boring".. work for another 2-5 minutes and then change the podcast again and so on and so on.. now that i think of it i might just stick to music along with tasks
Great video. Your explanation of this at the beginning of the video really resonated with me, but I would love it if there was better language than “being weak” in task initiation. Right away when I heard the word weak it reinforced the feeling that this is something wrong with me; a defect as opposed to a difference. Maybe the word deficit would be better? I have a deficit around task initiation. It may be semantics to some but weak is a shame trigger for me personally.
I agree with weak not being great, but deficit doesn't hit right with me either. Let's brainstorm! Something around us all being at different levels of executive function while still pointing out the fact that for some people the level is so low it's causing problems in their life. The reason I think that is important is I want people to understand it's not a moral shortcoming that there is actually a real problem, but they can improve their executive function.
Can you tell me how likely over how often do adults get a war disability wouldn’t have affected their entire life with every day I have a job now company and sympathetic. I don’t know. Just learning this video inability to start being impulsivity, but this is affecting affecting me with the things that I love to do and to be a person that can’t start anything at all. I forgotten how to begin in a timely manner😮, it makes me sad. It makes me sick of my self It’s so bad that I don’t even know if I know how or if I remember to immediately, it’s OK I don’t ever feel emotionally well enough to sit down and focus Most of all I worry that I’ll never be a productive adult with hobbies that I love or a job ever again
First I would say love on yourself. Negative feelings about yourself will just make everything worse. It's a distraction in itself. Give yourself grace that this is a challenge and that is okay. Remind yourself you are building the skill of...in this case getting started on things. ADHD touches every bit of our life for all of us. Practice getting started when you don't feel like it. It will get easier. Also ask yourself how you are a productive adult right now. There must be small ways that you are. I want you to keep noticing the small ways. Don't wait to enjoy your hobbies until you have been productive enough. You deserve joy in your life. I hope this helps. Any suggestions of videos I could make that would help you specifically?
That is not a heart and a thumbs up for what you said but for you as a person. You are not any of these things you said about yourself here. That is just what you are finding evidence for. Start telling a more positive story you also believe is true. It might start with, "I think I might be able to..." Start looking for evidence of ways you are capable and you will find them. What you say will be so be careful with your words. Wishing you the best and sending positive thoughts.
Hi I've currently closed consultations for a time as my client roster is full. If you email me at mande@learntothrivewithadhd.com and just say Put Me On The List I can let you know when I open the doors for more clients.
Thinking about the end result was something I recently noticed I wasn’t doing. I already do a lot of the other things to get through it once I get started. Having a vision for the end result helps get started and gives me ideas of what to start with.
Thank you for sharing, Donald. Good awareness. I appreciate you leaving a comment.
I'm looking for people to coaching on my video podcast. Would you be interested?
If you want to have more time for other procrastination activities you can skip this video to 2:07
Thanks.
MVP
Good to pair something positive to the task to get you going. I also do things in small steps. Like one day I'll clean half the kitchen. I will make sure I say to self that I accomplished something.
I'm trying to think about the end result, and the task isn't even that hard for me, I have just cannot do it. It's like there's a block for me. I did like the top about body doubling. I may try to find someone to hold me accountable until I get my task done. Thanks!
Some people simply can't visualize. Try mind mapping or writing a story that include the end result. Definitely body double though. It's really helpful.
Thank you so much for this very succinct video, I got a good few nuggets of wisdom there and I feel better about getting on with a task that I have been trying to get started for 2 months or more! Very interesting and most helpful is the part about noticing what you are thinking about the task and getting those negative thoughts out of your head and onto paper. Much love and gratitude from the UK 🇬🇧
I'm so glad! Yes, being honest about what we're thinking is so important. It's the first key to solving the problem, which is awareness. I tell my clients there are 3 stages. 1. You will become aware of what you are thinking. 2. You will judge yourself for thinking it. 3. You will accept it as part of who you are, and that is where true change steps in.
I'm looking for people to coaching on my video podcast. Would you be interested?
@@learntothrivewithadhd yeah sure, sounds interesting
I finally got the clothes folded on the couch. At one point I could not see the couch. Now I can see most of it. 😊
Good for you! I remember the days of the doom pile of laundry on the couch. I did this for years. What is a way you can change your system so this doesn't happen? Even if it slows down your laundry process. Slower and available is better than clean and in the pile. Do you have ideas?
Laundromat is the best option because it all gets done at one time. But that's kind of sketchy.
I'm looking for people to coaching on my video podcast. Would you be interested?
I struggle to initiate ANY task, even ones that are super easy that I really want to do. Rewards aren't engaging or helpful, I'm not motivated by them and I don't get anything out of them. Breaking tasks down just makes the situation worse. I'm not thinking anything about the task except that I want or need to do it. Do you have any other tips?
Force yourself
@@Bamstarter Gee wish I'd thought of that 😂 Be serious
Yep. There is something else going on here. How are you feeling day to day?
same
I am exactly the same! I can't do anything usually, even though I don't feel depressed due to my antidepressants, and rewards aren't motivating. I don't get any pleasure from completing a task so I have no internal motivation.
This has no comments yet, so I will leave one!
Thank you for this video, it's very short but has good tips and I will try to send it to my ADHD friends who struggle with even watching a video about ADHD strategies - I think they might be able to take time to watch this at least! I will also try my best to learn to do tasks myself, because I also have ADHD myself.
Thanks for that! I appreciate you sharing it with those that need it.
I'm looking for people to coaching on my video podcast. Would you be interested?
Ok, but the thing that's hard with this is that everything you listed still involves a lot of thinking and planning. I just want my brain to work!
Yes. The thinking and planning becomes procrastination.
First, your brain works. As a coach I obligate myself to suggest you watch the language you are using about yourself. Even the small stuff we say matters. And yes you need a system of thinking and planning that works for you. I have an ADHD Self Coaching course coming that will be free that I think would be really useful to you. All that said I get what you are saying. It can be frustrating but it can also get better. Stay positive. You have got this!
It absolutely can! I caution my clients to take as little time planning as possible because creating the big beautiful plan is a hit of dopamine itself. Then we taken so much energy making the plan we don't execute and feel bad about it.
شكراً لك لقد ساعدتني حقاً وكتبت نقاطك في ملاحضاتي، Thank you so much.
You're welcome! Thanks for commenting.
Have you heard of lack of task initiation on something you enjoy doing or something that's not fun like going to the movies but still gives you dopamine and not much negative thoughts?
Oh absolutely yes! I do that all the time. There is something I know will be fun or I'll really enjoy that I can procrastinate on if I'm not careful. The same rules apply. I wonder if part of what you are describing is also all the work it takes to get to the thing. That can be daunting if we don't have our lives and minds organized.
@@learntothrivewithadhd I don't know if it's also from my surgery and seizures. If I'm sitting at a desk, ready to work, cleared all distractions, on a task I want to do, and no racing thoughts for some reason I have to "push" myself to start the task. I don't know if that's ADHD compared to procrastination where distractions and other dopamine highs keep you from doing the task. I heard the former experienced in people who had TBI. But I'm trying to find a therapist who can help me with it.
@@PatientPerspective that would be interesting to look into. Also something I tell my clients when we are working on time management is you are almost never going to want to do the thing you planned to do. Setting up that expectation can be so helpful in getting past the upset of not wanting to get started. And it's mostly true and it normalizes the negative emotion around doing the thing.
I have a question. I force myself to do things sometimes and when I'm not I try to push my buttons to do things like watching motivational videos, trying to rest with no sound; doing nothing these things help me. The things you mentioned and things I do like pushing my buttons can keep me like around 5 to 8 days, then my mind just stops I need something very simulating like 3-4 days laying down scrolling, reading books, going for walks etc. and due to this I failed many lessons. I used to be worse like I needed a break day if I studied 2 days in a row and felt very tired. I improved trying hard. But I seem to not progress any further and my improvement stopped. After 5-8 days studying I have to have a 3-4 days long break is kind of pulling me down. So my question is how do I keep using the methods you mentioned continuously? How can I improve further? I don't know what to do about this and I'm in a heavy engineering course in college so I have to keep pushing regularly
It's hard to say for sure without asking you more questions but it sounds like you are pushing yourself too hard on the days you are on and then having to rest and rejuvenate. What about creating a day that has your responsibilities handled plus rest and rejuvenation?
@@learntothrivewithadhd I'll try
I’m going to try these suggestions
Awesome! Let me know how it goes.
I'm looking for people to coaching on my video podcast. Would you be interested?
This happens so often-we get caught up in countless other "useful" tasks instead of focusing on what's truly urgent. For example, you intend to grade student essays but end up washing dishes, watching motivational videos, replying to emails, or even cleaning a room that's been messy for months. Twelve hours later, the essays remain untouched... 😮😢
We know these tasks need to get done eventually, but somehow, when there’s something more pressing, these activities suddenly seem incredibly important.
I have a couple clients have are currently professors and they do. not. like. grading essays. It takes a long time. You want to leave a thoughtful or helpful comment. And it can be boring. All setting you up to not want to do it. Everything you describe is faster and more rewarding even if you don't want to do those things either? Except the room. I bet there is high reward but that probably took a while. I would break the task up. I'll do X amount of essays then do the dishes or go for a walk then do X amount of essays and give yourself time. Set up the expectation they don't get them back for a week for example.
Thank you for sharing. Very brief but tremendously helpful suggestions. You are a life saver!
Glad it was helpful!
I'm looking for people to coaching on my video podcast. Would you be interested?
Thank you. This helped me a lot. I still struggle, but I wanna keep learning.
I'm so glad. This is one of my most popular videos so obviously many of us struggle with this.
I'm looking for people to coaching on my video podcast. Would you be interested?
Thank you for these tips, they are very helpful.
I'm so glad it was helpful to you. Thanks for checking out the video.
I'm looking for people to coaching on my video podcast. Would you be interested?
Thank you for these impactful strategies 🙏🏾
Thank you for commenting! I hope they have been helpful to you.
I'm looking for people to coaching on my video podcast. Would you be interested?
I start distracting tasks. Organize the garage when I need to do emails
Yes! I heard this call procrastitivity the other day. Procrastinating with other activities that seem useful or important. Remind yourself you can do that later. Perhaps give it a specific day and time and get back to the thing you know you should do.
I'm looking for people to coaching on my video podcast. Would you be interested?
the timing one has been working thank you. but trying to figure out which podcast to listen to before starting work sucks ughhh
When I stress about the perfect podcast I go to most recent. Unless your kidding. You mean to start work not to procrastinate starting right. 😁
@@learntothrivewithadhd no im really not kidding LOL. for example i'd find a podcast, then i'll work for about 2-5 minutes, then try to find another podcast because it got "boring".. work for another 2-5 minutes and then change the podcast again and so on and so on..
now that i think of it i might just stick to music along with tasks
Great video. Your explanation of this at the beginning of the video really resonated with me, but I would love it if there was better language than “being weak” in task initiation. Right away when I heard the word weak it reinforced the feeling that this is something wrong with me; a defect as opposed to a difference. Maybe the word deficit would be better? I have a deficit around task initiation. It may be semantics to some but weak is a shame trigger for me personally.
I agree with weak not being great, but deficit doesn't hit right with me either. Let's brainstorm! Something around us all being at different levels of executive function while still pointing out the fact that for some people the level is so low it's causing problems in their life. The reason I think that is important is I want people to understand it's not a moral shortcoming that there is actually a real problem, but they can improve their executive function.
Area for development?
Can you tell me how likely over how often do adults get a war disability wouldn’t have affected their entire life with every day I have a job now company and sympathetic. I don’t know. Just learning this video inability to start being impulsivity, but this is affecting affecting me with the things that I love to do and to be a person that can’t start anything at all. I forgotten how to begin in a timely manner😮, it makes me sad. It makes me sick of my self It’s so bad that I don’t even know if I know how or if I remember to immediately, it’s OK I don’t ever feel emotionally well enough to sit down and focus
Most of all I worry that I’ll never be a productive adult with hobbies that I love or a job ever again
First I would say love on yourself. Negative feelings about yourself will just make everything worse. It's a distraction in itself. Give yourself grace that this is a challenge and that is okay. Remind yourself you are building the skill of...in this case getting started on things. ADHD touches every bit of our life for all of us. Practice getting started when you don't feel like it. It will get easier. Also ask yourself how you are a productive adult right now. There must be small ways that you are. I want you to keep noticing the small ways. Don't wait to enjoy your hobbies until you have been productive enough. You deserve joy in your life. I hope this helps. Any suggestions of videos I could make that would help you specifically?
I can’t make myself do any of this. I am completely useless. Literally can’t do anything and I’m about to give up the idea of doing anything.
That is not a heart and a thumbs up for what you said but for you as a person. You are not any of these things you said about yourself here. That is just what you are finding evidence for. Start telling a more positive story you also believe is true. It might start with, "I think I might be able to..." Start looking for evidence of ways you are capable and you will find them. What you say will be so be careful with your words. Wishing you the best and sending positive thoughts.
Do you offer online consultation?
Hi I've currently closed consultations for a time as my client roster is full. If you email me at mande@learntothrivewithadhd.com and just say Put Me On The List I can let you know when I open the doors for more clients.
I'm looking for people to coaching on my video podcast. Would you be interested?
I have no body double. Not even one
They are free online lots of places. You can google. If you don't find something comment back and I'll help you.
Can I be very successful without meds?
Absolutely.
I'm looking for people to coaching on my video podcast. Would you be interested?
@@learntothrivewithadhd Absolutely, yes count me in. What would I need to do in terms of preparation?
@work_in_progress161 nothing. Go to my website and book a call and I'll change it to a 1hr podcast session. www.learntothrivewithadhd.com
2:11