I’m a 20 year old woman and I love your channel! I’ve always been really into evolutionary psychology/ biology, especially in the face of constant pushes on the part of extreme progressives to argue “blank slate” theories. Something that I have really been struggling with lately is something you have touched on your channel, but I would want some more specific advice and honestly it feels like your one of the only people who would be able to help me. I’m not sure if this is something that possibly would require an actual private consultation, which I would be interested in, but I’m having huge, huge problems recently trying to reconcile my ambition in the field I’m pursuing in college and also wanting to be happy/ fulfilled in a relationship with what I wold consider to be a high value man. It seems that my suspicions my whole life are true- it is that with each step I make towards making more money for myself, I am only decreasing my chances of finding a man whom I would consider high value (and him finding me attractive in return). I acknowledge that hypergamy does not have to only run along the financial dimension, but realistically, with other factors at play, I am basically doomed unless something gives. The bigger problem here, and obviously I don’t say this with the intention of flattering myself, is that I am also intelligent (consistently score top 1 percentile on standardized exams) along with my ambition. That means that if women always look for men smarter than themselves, my pool is instantly shrunk to less than 1 percent of the male population (and I do want my partner to be at least as intelligent as I am). Along with that (again, not self flattery), I’m fit and likely pretty conventionally attractive. I take care of myself and would want the same from my partner. To spare you the details, I feel very lost. As much as I love your channel, sometimes the truth is a very hard pill to swallow and I’ve cried a few times in the past week thinking of how I’ll likely end up alone unless I change either my hypergamous standards or lower my own self down the ladder in order to accommodate a greater pool of men. I’ve even tried my hand a few times at men who are smarter than me/ have greater future potential, and it is so true that, as such high value men, they will not be satisfied with monogamy with me (which is what I want). How do I reconcile wanting a hypergamous and monogamous relationship with the fact that I will likely, on my current trajectory, be very successful? Maybe I should just try my hand at nursing or elementary school teacher and tap into my feminine energy… Either way, advice or a private consultation would be wonderful. See my response: www.patreon.com/posts/patreon-young-so-46308963
A friend of mine said: "You're a rare type, of course it's going to be difficult for you to find a partner because she's rare too" (don't get many compliments on looks but I do get them in these areas, this one made my day)
Switching careers sounds like a poor life decision in my opinion. Why contribute less monetarily for a future family after all the hard work? You can help a guy way more. Actually, I don’t know many guys who reject successful women; some actually are happy with that since they are less likely to be a parasite holding on to their finances. I think the problem is her standards and lack of humility (why do you need to say “top 1% percentile on standardised exams” - as if that says a whole lot about intelligence or if Alex of any of us cared and throwing that kind of specific stuff while saying “not flattery”... ) Just because a guy doesn’t have a degree or a well paying job doesn’t mean he is not worth being looked up to. With a thought process like that no idea why she thinks she is super intelligent. She sounds like the averagest woman going for bad boys and looking for sympathy. Poor me, only not well off in dating because of my own flawed thinking.
Automatically and its justified and obvious. Authentically having standards about what we value in women and what they can bring is definitely on the docket for many of us. Myself included.
From a woman’s perspective I partially disagree. Whenever I go out to somewhere like gas station with my sister and theres usually old dudes cat calling and saying all types of names. We can already tell their being disingenuous. When we don’t respond the comments most of the time they get mad and then turn around and throw insults. Most women who get random “compliments” will immediately have the assumption that the dude either wants to sleep with you or some other ulterior motive. And I feel like as a black woman I also have to be wary fetishization and old guys that prey on girls my age. Especially when I see people talk about how it’s easier “to mold” girls my age straight out of highschool. But I’m a black girl in highschool so I guess my perspective of this is different from you guys. I’m assuming that most of the people that have seen his videos are white middle aged dudes but who knows 🤷🏾♀️
@Dan Swildens i live in a area where it’s common for people to do that all the time. Any time a go outside my neighborhood to the grocery store, gas station theirs always some dude who’s trying to get money either to buy alcohol or drugs. It’s a normal occurrence especially since everything is so close.
I understand how you feel, everything you been tought and you tought you understood of the world is the complete opposite. For a long time I was filed with rage, but I learned to accept it and realized “hey it is what it is” either imma be mad my entire life or just learn to live with it.
“I wish it need not have happened in my time," said Frodo. "So do I," said Gandalf, "and so do all who live to see such times. But that is not for them to decide. All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us.”
Totally guys. We live in very trying times, we are forced to watch society rot and wither away and no matter how hard we try we cannot distance ourselves from it. But remember, in order for new growth to take hold, old growth must eventually rot away. Remember that since we're the ones who are cursed to witness the whole disgusting spectacle we're also the ones blessed to around for the next beginning. Many of us will sire the sons and daughters who first venture out into the next great chapter of mankind's journey.
here is what I've learnt, if your on a date and she went to the hairdresser complement her hair, or bought a new dress, complement the dress, etc, they like to be validated on their efforts especially if they did them for you, but don't just drop validation to try and make them like you..
To many rules to understand women these days. Don't do too much of this, don't do too little of that, don't go left, don't go right, don't tell her this, don't tell her that...Nah! Relations are artificially becoming too difficult. Most of the time it isn't even worth all the trouble! Modern society is destroying interpersonal relations.
You're wrong its actually not complicated. If you're attractive to most women, all their petty requirements goes out the window. Women have to trick themselves into liking the average man. If you're not chad, you're losing.
For a long time I've consciously thought of myself as a low self-esteem, low-confidence guy. But I've only recently realized that that's not how I behave in real life situations, in real situations I'm more often than not quite confident without even realizing it. Maybe I have a false perception of myself. Watching this video made me think and realize that I almost never call women pretty and I usually look into the small details about a person to compliment them on. And this video also made me realize that I don't feel the need to be called handsome or good looking, and when I think about it, my mother and family have always called me handsome and I'm very used to it. So, parents: Make sure to tell your son very often that he's very handsome and good looking. Because it might be a life-changing confidence boost to him when he grows up into a man.
At a certain age you don't take any compliments from your parents seriously. You know, kinda like "my mum said I am pretty". This is a complement every child gets
@@NonExistChannel that's true, i don't take compliments from my parents seriously anymore, but it was still drilled into my head since an early age. When youre a small child, you do believe those compliments, so you grow up subconsciously believing that you really are good looking.
@@NonExistChannel that's not true, I get compliments all the time and alot of them are by women. If you want compliments you have to do some self improvements learn new skills, workout, become confident in your self, learn how to dress stylish, stuff like that and you'll get compliments. Don't expect compliments if you're lazy and play video games all day.
By constantly telling her how good she looks, you're only inflating her ego and make her not take you seriously. Then she goes to find someone "better" than you.
@@JezaLoki nope you are just not attractive. When i was younger, no girls were attracted to me. I ve got more mass, im in shape, i have elegant clothes and girls are turing around to just look at me passing by. Thats all, and covid is even better opportunity for u right now, cus u dont need to show your face if it is not that attractive :)
@@cezary8673 wait, are you telling me or asking me if I’m not attractive? Good for you on your self improvement, btw. Keep it up. I’ll never know what it feels like to have a stranger check me out. Or, at least when they are looking at me I assume it more out of a twisted curiosity.
I had a gf a few years back, and I did exactly what you say in this video. The girl was very smart, she was in med school, spent nights just talking until 6 AM, and after we had sex and started a relationship, I told her that she is gorgeous, because she really was, but I knew not to compliment her before, because she was gorgeous and she knew it even by her attitude. And she was so freaking happy when I did that, she told me something like "I do not know why, but when other guys told me that in the past, I did not believe them, but when it comes from you, I just feel that you really mean it., do not know why" . Sooo, that is true, but only if you are authentic. If you like her only for looks, and nothing more, and you compliment her for something that is not real for you, you are just being manipulative. This thing is just something that you need to learn and incorporate in your self, not just use as a tool to get her
Girls know that guys will say anything to get them into bed. I guess compliments after sleeping together have little merit for the guy and are therefore more believable perhaps
They can see right through the thirst and desperation. A woman who is of high enough value knows that a high value man will look below the surface and if you can genuinely compliment her on her attributes/charachteristics she'll respect you for it. A good analogy is the supply and demand analogy. When she gets tonnes of compliments about her appearance the value of that particular kind of compliment decreases. If she hasn't had compliments about her appearance then when she does get one form you after the fact that you've complimented her about other attributes, then the value of that compliment means way much more.
I disagree that by saying it you are just being manipulative. It's hard to know anything beyond someone's appearance when you first meet them, so if you're keen, the temptation can be organic and honest to compliment the thing that initially attracts you! But I agree, it's well beyond pathetic to compliment the looks of a woman you don't know. Even with honest intentions, you should know better!
In direct correlation to how gawky & gangly & ugly said teenage girl feels... Once their consciousness adapts to being a "woman" from "girl," it loses efficacy...
“Your hair is mesmerizing, like Goldilocks’. Also you could get away with murder. With those extensions if you killed someone CSI would lock down some random Ukrainian chick.”
I like this chick who works in the hardware store by my work. We get alot of our supplies, fittings and such there etc. I like her alot and I was gonna tell her she was pretty and ask her for her number and then I saw this video. Good save, man.
you wouldnt be telling her anything she doesnt already know or hasnt heard already its pointless to start off with complimenting a girl ..approach her instead like just another person because after all thats what she is
Bro please do not risk it man. Idk how old you are but it's not worth it. Maybe tell her she's got good energy if you've talked to her or some other compliment aside from her looks lol. You gotta be careful because you don't wanna get yourself in trouble.
Tip: Tell her she's really good at her work. Like she's one of the best hardware store salesperson in your area.😉 And don't ask her number that time. Go back another day and ask her number after casually talking for another 2/3 more visits.
The problem is that men are almost never complimented; for instance, the last time I was complimented it was April 2019, for my T-shirt. So they give what they would like to get. And that's the problem.
I believe this is because, us men, are not doing enough to create curiosity/interest/atraction for women to be atracted by us and by choices that we've made. Choices like: -picking a good masculine cologne that has been reviewed to have been complimented before by women. -having a good sense of style according to your age and havibg clothes that fit your body, not too skinny not too baggy just right for you. -having a presence on social media, by this I mean having some kind of professional pictures with you, not selfies but actual photos taken by a photographer or a friend to showcase your fashion style, this is more for online dating -also having a career, having an income to afford rent or a place of your own, to afford a car so that you can be independent and on your own.
@@timebandit. And once you've done all this, you still won't get any compliments from women, then you'll understand that women are just different creatures. We feel a strong need to compliment women, they feel absolutely no need to compliment us or even appreciate what we do, even when we're lightyears out of their league.
Once in college I happened to take a bus with a colleague I had never talked to. So she knew my face, that I was not a creep or something, etc. We were having a great conversation, and I called her intelligent with all honesty. This changed the way she looked at me. She kept initiating message conversations from time to time. Always very amicable. I definitely could try something, the interest was there. Nothing happened simply due to bad logistics, and that was my last day in that college.
When u approach a woman, youve already established to her that she is attractive. She wants to know what sets her apart from all the other pretty women in the room.
Honestly, not much. They're into the same songs, same Netflix shows, have a high sense of entitlement but will run to daddy government the moment someone breathes at them the wrong way.
I've never known a woman who didn't appreciate being told she's attractive, no matter how good looking she is. It's not the compliment that's the problem, it's the guy and how he goes about it. If you can't compliment a woman without making her either feel uncomfortable or lose respect for you, not complimenting is probably not going to get you very far either.
@@hopefullyanonymous3466 No, if she doesn’t appreciate your compliment it means you were already in there. If she’s into you she’ll lap up your compliment.
Much of our training on this subject comes from movies. In the movies, a handsome guy tells a gorgeous woman that she is pretty. She then blushes and finds it very romantic and is instantly turned on by the compliment. She then says something like "I am? Nobody has ever told me I'm pretty before!" This aint reality, guys. If she is gorgeous, she has been told she is gorgeous thousands of times since she was a small child. The Cinderella story is a fantasy only found in the movies. Time to get a grip on reality.
Validation of their beauty to some women, may be white noise, but from my experience they cannot stand being ignored. When they are accustomed to having heads turn when they enter the room.
I like this 😂 it reminds me Madagascar 2 with Motomoto keeps validating Gloria how she is huge. Then Melman came out and tell Motomoto everything about the things he loves about Gloria like those beautiful laughs 😂
No you treat her like a sex object and you ask for what you want. Don't be the nice guy by treating her normal and going the friend route. You don't need to validate her but you should be straightforward with your intentions.
@@MyUniqueHandle. True. A man should spend time on his hobbies, ambitions, and accumulation of wealth... Women like independent men. I found out this a bit too late.
When you are not in a relationship do not say this. When you are in a relationship, you can then say this. This comes across as sincere. This is like someone who never swears, swearing, you know they are genuinely unset/line crossed
@@runreilly you have 2 friends, 1 friend swears like a sailor, the other never swears. When no.1 swears at you because of something you did, its hard to tell if angry or or not. When no.2 swears at you for a similar reason, you know you messed up and can feel it inside you
As a Muslim I would say u are correct in some of what u are saying. That is why islam has women wear hijab and Cover themselves. This stops the compliments coming in full stop. So they ain't conditioned to be desensitised to complements from their husband and it forces them to grow their moral character and personality and prevens arrogance. There is a saying and it goes like this: a Muslim woman wears armour and she only takes it off for her husband. Peace x
@@RahimRahmat this is not promotion of Islam. Just a different perspective that actually exists in this world and many ppl are living world wide, regardless of race. So why can these ppl replicate this success? Islam gives practical and workable solutions to real world problems. Hope u peace love and prosperity sir x
@@schoolworkaccount3887 Gee.... I don't know..... maybe because *this* is not the video or the place?? If I (or even you) wanted to put out some great things about Islam, maybe it's best done in a video about Islam? Maybe, I should try recording my own video to say what I want to say? There are many places to do this kind of things.... the right place and time for everything, you know?
Yup! ♀️ are told everyday that they are attractive. Never kiss their feet by telling them so... and don't expect any compliments from them either. Love yourself instead.
I wish I could remember what channel I was watching when I saw an excellent example of this. A guy had a reply video to a chick doing this very thing, she was scrolling through the comments on her video completely ignoring the positive ones and reacting to only the negative comments. She had 100's of positive comments and 15-20 negative comments, it was crazy.
She doesn't want some guy telling her she is pretty. But when it comes from the guy, sometimes, like water in the dessert, she will appreciate it. Make her look for that Oasis and enjoy when she blooms out of the sand giving you epic contrast.
Maybe in relationships you still should praise your woman for her other good characteristics more than for her beauty. My ex bf was always talking about how pretty I am and how sexy I am. I was actually quite OK with that up to one point, cus I was insecure about my weight, my body and my face. But when I became secure, his praise became pointless. And even when he praised me for something else, “pretty” was the first thing he would name and then others. Sorry for mistakes, if there are any, english is not my native (hi from Russia)
Over complimenting a woman's looks is something that I've always done in hopes to getting romantically involved with her. It worked one 1 girl, my ex but lately I've noticed how low quality she was
@@SkinnyFlackooBEATS I don't know which app they use, but they use some "checklist" app once they talk to a guy. And one of their "demands", is that the guy is AT LEAST 6"0 tall... All while themselves can be short as dwarfs.
Anndddd, here's our side of the story (Disclaimer I speak for around 90% of girls out there not including the fishing for compliments ones) Now Let's just say you're in a scenario where you and a girl are going getting ready for a party. She did her makeup, put on her outfit and everything and asks "Do I look good", if u say yes then that's great you're good to go but if u say "No you're ugly" she'll probably feel really bad about it and even cancel going to the party. And bam you just lost a friend, congrats Boys don't even matter to us in a "am i pretty" situation (most of the time) but instead about other girls. There are so many other girls out there who only care about looks and then go to personality and unluckily they're usually the popular ones, so if u don't look pretty to them it's all over bullying starts and that's an argument for later. So obviously the girl decides to wear a dress, put on makeup and might ask if they look pretty looking for an honest but not cruel opinion. And u guys think they're a spoiled brat or it has to do with u (Talk about ego lol) In short, we're insecure and want one special person to reassure us that there's no reason to be insecure. But again u guys think thats "spoiled brat behavior and have a big ego" and go on saying we're ugly
I always go with "we're good looking". Demonstrates value, because you treat it like it's both obvious for you and her as well as it's bonding by proving your matching your levels in that term.
My friend Carlos back home once told a girl: "yeah I guess you're above average but you're no playboy bikini model". I don't know if they dated, but I'm pretty sure he nailed her at some point.
Alexander, you told us couple videos ago that telling a woman is pretty is actually 1. making compliments to her parents, 2. a time loss, 3. a woman's ego boosting (and boasting), among other things, but I thank you for making me remember this.
As a women I can confirm that this is true! Though I shouldn’t speak for all women. Many of us can also tell if you think we are attractive by the way you look or don’t look at us as well.
The majority i would assume learned it the hard way. Beauty could fade by time but personality doesn’t. It’s a bonus to be attractive but it has to be attached with some good traits.
I've learned this rule very soon. I remember I was a teenager and complimented a very beautiful classmate on her legs. The look of despise in her eyes was instantly. I remember being very confused in the moment thinking what hell I did wrong. In my mind I was just being nice
Your advice rings true The only thing I would add is that if I like someone, then a sincere compliment from them will put me over the moon. But if someone I don't know/ have no interest in gives me a compliment it just makes me suspicious of their intentions
ROFLWAFFLE oh the bullshit of life!! Yesterday a woman rejected or "rejected" me at least(going round and round with her but she has self esteem issues) because I didn't tell her she's pretty. She made her hair all nice and hot and but she knows I don't care if she calls me handsome and she didn't say that was why but it was obvious I needed to say it. UGH and it's valentine's day.😫😫😫 She says she sees a therapist and I think that therapist shouldn't be allowed to give therapy anymore. LOL but then again my I.Q. of 117 isn't definitely that high since it was just a 50 question test and I guess it should've been at least 50 questions longer so margin of error with that if 25 points means I'm kind of dumb.😂🤣💩👀😱
Whenever I see a hot girl I talk to her in a calm fashion and figure out her personality and talents and compliment her on those things But when I see an average girl I smile at her and make her feel special and compliment her on her looks like her dressing style and makeup this strategy has helped me a lot with women in general
A girl posts selfies of herself on social media, some suggestions for good ways to stand out: 1. Jeez your such a poser aren’t you 2. What’s up with the weird background Anyone agree with me here? Anyone have other better suggestions?
Yeah just don't say anything. Being a narcissist on social media is behaviour that you shouldn't reward. Ignore it, if you really want to talk to her message her directly in her private inbox
@@ctb1977 they complain about having tons of messages mate. I would say don’t be offensive if you’re gonna comment on her photos. Make sure it’s humorous lil bit.
I've noticed this when it comes to artwork i commission. Its dull to me when random people from twitter compliment the works I get but when I show my friends, I feel so good showing them
To your point and previous points in other blogs, dating apps make this harder, because there's not much to work off of besides her looks and basic/general info
I think there's two ways to tell a girl she's good looking... 1) the overly expressive & nervous beta type who is expecting instant sex from such a brilliant remark 2) the non reactive alpha type, who is passing a compliment but continues to test her and show he isn't phased by her appearance, he's not charmed just because she's hot. I think number 2 is perfectly fine and actually could even be seen as a back handed compliment that puts her feet on the ground, at least for that interaction anyway... Which is the whole point.
Honestly the whole "alpha" and "beta" mentality is really toxic and useless. Just do whatever you want whenever you feel like, you don't need to categorize yourself that is based on sexism.
I disagree, women's self-esteem is usually damaged, even with all the instagram's simps. They are still looking for real life validation, so if you are a high quality man your attention is still enjoyed if you are not beeing cringy using stupid compliments.
They like validation, but they don't see those men as dating prospects. It's so obvious what your real intentions are: Sex. Women already know if they're pretty or not, like alex said you're just stating the obvious and with that you're exposing your true intentions. It's gross.
@@Repsforjesus67 if you are a high quality man, you already know the girls you are trying to date, so they know what you are looking for. So when you compliment her property (not necessarily the way he looks), in the appropriate moment when she's opening to you, then you show your intentions and you have a great chance to success. I just mean compliment is still a powerful weapon if done properly.
The biggest flaw in terms of thinking about how to act towards a woman you like is to think you should act towards her like you want her to act towards you.
I do day game, and always open with a compliment. I.e. you look nice, you have beautiful eyes.. 8 times out of 10 I’ve turned her cheeks red and she’s showing signs of nervousness. But I always follow with a tease about something she’s wearing. It seems to work for me.
For some reason I had telling her all this compliments inside my head, but I am not the type of dude telling a girl straight in her face She is in love with me now
@Angel Rose yes.... That instant attraction which we feel, considered lust, is very similar to when you see anything that is beautiful that you want to own. Like a nice car, the only difference is that your have the biological trigger to breed combined. Beauty is the most attractive feature solely because it is the easiest to guage the quality of the item. Example, a beautiful apples is usually more delicious than an ugly apple. I am no angel, when i see a beautiful girl I like it but I know that people can be rotten under the beautiful skin. I hope it helps.
I've had positive results from it where the girl wasn't conventionally 'pretty' (don't judge a book by its cover and all that). I don't think she'd heard it before in years, if ever.
Alexander you are on point! I also find that if a woman has a certain look, and is used to validation, she will think every glance, every hello means a guy likes her. Maybe he is just being friendly because he is nice to everyone, but she is not his type.
Men: OMG, you are so beautiful! Alexander: You need to be different to stand out, she has already heard that Men: You look like such a special kind-hearted angel. You really are a gift from god. Alexander: ...
One of the few things I can confidently say I have never done 😁. Even when they were clearly fishing for compliments - because guess what, that displays precisely the type of insecurity you don't want to engage with.
Hate to break it to you guys, but if telling a woman she is beautiful ruins your chances with her, you never had any chance anyway. If you think shes pretty, say it, if she hates you for it, move on. She wasn't the one.
I get that you must not put women on a pedestal but the alternative you're giving is still a cop out and very dishonest. This is why in divorce you hear things like "he now hates my writing/charity work etc." No man is attracted to a woman's passion. Secondly you will find that the majority of people are capable of kindness, compassion, respectability etc. given the right conditions. The people who lack these qualities are in the extreme for example pathological liars are usually victims of some trauma or have a mental condition. I am not saying this wont work it will work but it is also just another pick up strategy and it is not sustainable in the long run. It's a lot liked the 'similar interests' strategy which always backfires. Women really want to believe men who employ these strategies because they're also conditioned to think that their womanhood and virtue is not enough so to attract men they must know sports, travel, understand the trans-pacific treaty of whatever etc. Your advice is based on the modern kind of "we are best friends"/"we are partners kind of relationship". Don't con women gents, if a woman wants to believe that her helping poor communities or her short stories are a bigger factor in her attractiveness then her ass then she lying to herself. Tell her that: "you have a pretty face and a great ass, that's why I am here, I will tolerate your writing and I will try my best with the charity because that's what relationships are about"
Can't agree less on this. It is a very natural part of flirting. I'm a man, I do what I like, not what some wannabe dictator on UA-cam tells me to do. Killing chances you say? The smile after giving her a compliment says otherwise, as well as my experience. I don't compliment her to get her attention or something like that, my inner self just tells me to do that. It just feels right. Like reproducing. I don't need to think about that, it is just a feeling that needs to be lived.
exactly! my parents have been married for more than 2 decades and my dad still tells my mom that she’s beautiful almost every day, started doing it before they even started dating. and it hasn’t once been a problem and it always brings a smile to her face. men who treat women like test subjects, like they’re not normal human beings, will never get far with them. stupid fucks lol.
So true! My husband is the only guy that noticed things about me other then my looks, he would compliment my creativity and art skills, sense of humor, and just how good our conversations were. The beauty compliments came along a little later, and it’s not every moment .. it’s usually in the moment when he’s looking at me and he will randomly say how beautiful he thinks I am. Loving your videos Alexander!
Guys: you need to understand that women use compliments as currency. Notice that a woman's Instagram is FULL of women praising each other. I was told this is because they think of compliments as something that can be paid back if they need it. So, when a woman compliments you, it's because she WANTS something. If you compliment her, that's how she takes it - you WANT something from her.
I’m a 20 year old woman and I love your channel! I’ve always been really into evolutionary psychology/ biology, especially in the face of constant pushes on the part of extreme progressives to argue “blank slate” theories.
Something that I have really been struggling with lately is something you have touched on your channel, but I would want some more specific advice and honestly it feels like your one of the only people who would be able to help me.
I’m not sure if this is something that possibly would require an actual private consultation, which I would be interested in, but I’m having huge, huge problems recently trying to reconcile my ambition in the field I’m pursuing in college and also wanting to be happy/ fulfilled in a relationship with what I wold consider to be a high value man.
It seems that my suspicions my whole life are true- it is that with each step I make towards making more money for myself, I am only decreasing my chances of finding a man whom I would consider high value (and him finding me attractive in return). I acknowledge that hypergamy does not have to only run along the financial dimension, but realistically, with other factors at play, I am basically doomed unless something gives.
The bigger problem here, and obviously I don’t say this with the intention of flattering myself, is that I am also intelligent (consistently score top 1 percentile on standardized exams) along with my ambition. That means that if women always look for men smarter than themselves, my pool is instantly shrunk to less than 1 percent of the male population (and I do want my partner to be at least as intelligent as I am). Along with that (again, not self flattery), I’m fit and likely pretty conventionally attractive. I take care of myself and would want the same from my partner.
To spare you the details, I feel very lost. As much as I love your channel, sometimes the truth is a very hard pill to swallow and I’ve cried a few times in the past week thinking of how I’ll likely end up alone unless I change either my hypergamous standards or lower my own self down the ladder in order to accommodate a greater pool of men. I’ve even tried my hand a few times at men who are smarter than me/ have greater future potential, and it is so true that, as such high value men, they will not be satisfied with monogamy with me (which is what I want).
How do I reconcile wanting a hypergamous and monogamous relationship with the fact that I will likely, on my current trajectory, be very successful? Maybe I should just try my hand at nursing or elementary school teacher and tap into my feminine energy…
Either way, advice or a private consultation would be wonderful.
See my response: www.patreon.com/posts/patreon-young-so-46308963
A friend of mine said: "You're a rare type, of course it's going to be difficult for you to find a partner because she's rare too" (don't get many compliments on looks but I do get them in these areas, this one made my day)
Another chamaleon
Switching careers sounds like a poor life decision in my opinion. Why contribute less monetarily for a future family after all the hard work? You can help a guy way more. Actually, I don’t know many guys who reject successful women; some actually are happy with that since they are less likely to be a parasite holding on to their finances.
I think the problem is her standards and lack of humility (why do you need to say “top 1% percentile on standardised exams” - as if that says a whole lot about intelligence or if Alex of any of us cared and throwing that kind of specific stuff while saying “not flattery”... )
Just because a guy doesn’t have a degree or a well paying job doesn’t mean he is not worth being looked up to.
With a thought process like that no idea why she thinks she is super intelligent. She sounds like the averagest woman going for bad boys and looking for sympathy. Poor me, only not well off in dating because of my own flawed thinking.
"I'm super smart but I cant curb my instincts even when I'm totaly aware of them".
We are not savages anymore, are we ?
Someone that lets their natural urges rule their life for them, is not that intelligent.
“Give her a crown, you will become her clown “
-The gospel of future
Treat her like a celebrity and she will treat you like a fan.
So true
Women find out that you need them and like them they think less of you. Makes no sense
Amen
Say it with me brothers and sisters: "She belong to the STREETS!"
Put her on a beauty pedestal and all she can do is look down on you.
Automatically and its justified and obvious. Authentically having standards about what we value in women and what they can bring is definitely on the docket for many of us. Myself included.
From a woman’s perspective I partially disagree. Whenever I go out to somewhere like gas station with my sister and theres usually old dudes cat calling and saying all types of names. We can already tell their being disingenuous. When we don’t respond the comments most of the time they get mad and then turn around and throw insults. Most women who get random “compliments” will immediately have the assumption that the dude either wants to sleep with you or some other ulterior motive. And I feel like as a black woman I also have to be wary fetishization and old guys that prey on girls my age. Especially when I see people talk about how it’s easier “to mold” girls my age straight out of highschool.
But I’m a black girl in highschool so I guess my perspective of this is different from you guys. I’m assuming that most of the people that have seen his videos are white middle aged dudes but who knows 🤷🏾♀️
@@user-us7py1cy2k Playing race card ? Pathetic ...
@Dan Swildens i live in a area where it’s common for people to do that all the time. Any time a go outside my neighborhood to the grocery store, gas station theirs always some dude who’s trying to get money either to buy alcohol or drugs. It’s a normal occurrence especially since everything is so close.
@@ansof3112 If you don’t think race can be contributing factor in these talks then I honestly don’t care for your commentary. 👋🏾
I hate the world we live in, honestly.
I understand how you feel, everything you been tought and you tought you understood of the world is the complete opposite. For a long time I was filed with rage, but I learned to accept it and realized “hey it is what it is” either imma be mad my entire life or just learn to live with it.
ovoxopr yup. Men used to know these things, it has been culturally forgotten. Just relearn it and you're miles ahead of every other guy.
“I wish it need not have happened in my time," said Frodo.
"So do I," said Gandalf, "and so do all who live to see such times. But that is not for them to decide. All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us.”
Totally guys. We live in very trying times, we are forced to watch society rot and wither away and no matter how hard we try we cannot distance ourselves from it. But remember, in order for new growth to take hold, old growth must eventually rot away. Remember that since we're the ones who are cursed to witness the whole disgusting spectacle we're also the ones blessed to around for the next beginning. Many of us will sire the sons and daughters who first venture out into the next great chapter of mankind's journey.
Me too
When you give her all your validation, you have no leverage left
Eww disgusting
@@anais8754 whats disgusting
@@ren.8137 her mentality
Yes, the dating market is just like the monetary market. It's It's called the meat market... so using financial terms like leverage makes total sense
here is what I've learnt, if your on a date and she went to the hairdresser complement her hair, or bought a new dress, complement the dress, etc, they like to be validated on their efforts especially if they did them for you, but don't just drop validation to
try and make them like you..
To many rules to understand women these days. Don't do too much of this, don't do too little of that, don't go left, don't go right, don't tell her this, don't tell her that...Nah! Relations are artificially becoming too difficult. Most of the time it isn't even worth all the trouble! Modern society is destroying interpersonal relations.
You're wrong its actually not complicated. If you're attractive to most women, all their petty requirements goes out the window. Women have to trick themselves into liking the average man. If you're not chad, you're losing.
@@bobmarley4272 Well, I am just a regular, average guy. No Chad, here! No patience either!
and yet, even after this laundry list... they STILL complain about not finding the "right guy" every time a Chad or Tyrone uses her
Yup. Don't even bother
Honestly women don't even know what they respond to, you look good then all of their rules or whatever goes out the window.
Your comment is so perfect, it's becoming exhausting tbh
My favorite compliment to tell women is " you are not that ugly"
Mine is "you have a great personality which makes up for your looks".. 🤣
Perfect you guys!!!...
Sounds like something patrice would say lmao
Lmao that is golden.
I laugh when a guy says that. I already where I stand. Makes me think you have some deep rooted anger you need to workout.
For a long time I've consciously thought of myself as a low self-esteem, low-confidence guy. But I've only recently realized that that's not how I behave in real life situations, in real situations I'm more often than not quite confident without even realizing it. Maybe I have a false perception of myself.
Watching this video made me think and realize that I almost never call women pretty and I usually look into the small details about a person to compliment them on.
And this video also made me realize that I don't feel the need to be called handsome or good looking, and when I think about it, my mother and family have always called me handsome and I'm very used to it.
So, parents: Make sure to tell your son very often that he's very handsome and good looking. Because it might be a life-changing confidence boost to him when he grows up into a man.
At a certain age you don't take any compliments from your parents seriously. You know, kinda like "my mum said I am pretty". This is a complement every child gets
@@NonExistChannel that's true, i don't take compliments from my parents seriously anymore, but it was still drilled into my head since an early age. When youre a small child, you do believe those compliments, so you grow up subconsciously believing that you really are good looking.
@@PentaKillMedia Until you find out, that no one every compliments a men (especially not women).
@@NonExistChannel that's not true, I get compliments all the time and alot of them are by women. If you want compliments you have to do some self improvements learn new skills, workout, become confident in your self, learn how to dress stylish, stuff like that and you'll get compliments. Don't expect compliments if you're lazy and play video games all day.
@@alanatom2376 Maybe you are in the top 20% but don't expect that every guy (even if he works on himself a lot) get compliments on a regular basis
By constantly telling her how good she looks, you're only inflating her ego and make her not take you seriously. Then she goes to find someone "better" than you.
@@thetruthwillsetyoufree112 this is a valid comment. Do you have insight/are you in the game? So to speak
Telling a woman she's attractive is heard as "you're more attractive than I am" and women don't date down.
Cope. If chad tell her She is pretty its all good
@@loosecannon6142 Bingo, as an attractive man, you bypass all her laws and bullshit and go straight to the goods.
@@loosecannon6142 how many chads are there ? 5% of men? Yeah dude, what I’m saying is right 95% of the time.
@@JezaLoki nope you are just not attractive. When i was younger, no girls were attracted to me. I ve got more mass, im in shape, i have elegant clothes and girls are turing around to just look at me passing by. Thats all, and covid is even better opportunity for u right now, cus u dont need to show your face if it is not that attractive :)
@@cezary8673 wait, are you telling me or asking me if I’m not attractive?
Good for you on your self improvement, btw. Keep it up.
I’ll never know what it feels like to have a stranger check me out. Or, at least when they are looking at me I assume it more out of a twisted curiosity.
I had a gf a few years back, and I did exactly what you say in this video. The girl was very smart, she was in med school, spent nights just talking until 6 AM, and after we had sex and started a relationship, I told her that she is gorgeous, because she really was, but I knew not to compliment her before, because she was gorgeous and she knew it even by her attitude. And she was so freaking happy when I did that, she told me something like "I do not know why, but when other guys told me that in the past, I did not believe them, but when it comes from you, I just feel that you really mean it., do not know why" . Sooo, that is true, but only if you are authentic. If you like her only for looks, and nothing more, and you compliment her for something that is not real for you, you are just being manipulative. This thing is just something that you need to learn and incorporate in your self, not just use as a tool to get her
This happens to me all the time. They say I can tell you mean it. Never clocked why but it is because I wait.
Girls know that guys will say anything to get them into bed. I guess compliments after sleeping together have little merit for the guy and are therefore more believable perhaps
They can see right through the thirst and desperation. A woman who is of high enough value knows that a high value man will look below the surface and if you can genuinely compliment her on her attributes/charachteristics she'll respect you for it. A good analogy is the supply and demand analogy. When she gets tonnes of compliments about her appearance the value of that particular kind of compliment decreases. If she hasn't had compliments about her appearance then when she does get one form you after the fact that you've complimented her about other attributes, then the value of that compliment means way much more.
I disagree that by saying it you are just being manipulative. It's hard to know anything beyond someone's appearance when you first meet them, so if you're keen, the temptation can be organic and honest to compliment the thing that initially attracts you!
But I agree, it's well beyond pathetic to compliment the looks of a woman you don't know. Even with honest intentions, you should know better!
Dating is a game if they can use make ups to manipulate us, why not use this tactic to get her
Calling a girl beautiful only works in middle school and sometimes highschool. Beyond that its hard
In direct correlation to how gawky & gangly & ugly said teenage girl feels... Once their consciousness adapts to being a "woman" from "girl," it loses efficacy...
@@nunyabidniz2868 and it starts working again once a girl reaches her later 30s
I think it only works if the guy who says it is attractive
@@heassik3088 I've used it and it sometimes works for me 😂 and I'm not that particularly attractive
I think compliments that can be taken as borderline insults are the best
Oh geez 🙄
Can you give an example?
“I love your sweater, for it’s reminiscent of my grandmother’s fashion sense.”
“Your hair is mesmerizing, like Goldilocks’. Also you could get away with murder. With those extensions if you killed someone CSI would lock down some random Ukrainian chick.”
I need more examples lmao
Oh man, this brings me back to the days when I used to say such stupidity to women lol 😂. Ugh 🤦🏻
A lot of ex-niceguys here, you're not alone. Just be glad you learned and are not still a hopeless romantic.
Me too dude lol! And I BET you were told once, by someone, that it was a good idea!
Think we all been there at one point brother
Men's attention and validation is VVomen's currency.
@Ishan Pandey This Based Bhartiya approves as well.
It's Men's currency. Their currency is sex and looks
@@MarvelousMusicmmusic u didn't get the meaning of the post.
@@rajakghosh6602 So enlighten me
why did you spell it VVomen?
I like this chick who works in the hardware store by my work. We get alot of our supplies, fittings and such there etc. I like her alot and I was gonna tell her she was pretty and ask her for her number and then I saw this video. Good save, man.
you wouldnt be telling her anything she doesnt already know or hasnt heard already its pointless to start off with complimenting a girl ..approach her instead like just another person because after all thats what she is
Bro please do not risk it man. Idk how old you are but it's not worth it. Maybe tell her she's got good energy if you've talked to her or some other compliment aside from her looks lol. You gotta be careful because you don't wanna get yourself in trouble.
Tip: Tell her she's really good at her work. Like she's one of the best hardware store salesperson in your area.😉
And don't ask her number that time. Go back another day and ask her number after casually talking for another 2/3 more visits.
@@wildestdreams_b quality reply 👍
@@zachlove2689 I just sincerely hope you're not simply gonna use and throw her. Good luck!
The problem is that men are almost never complimented; for instance, the last time I was complimented it was April 2019, for my T-shirt.
So they give what they would like to get.
And that's the problem.
Yeah... but... alas... Commodore's been long gone. Too much dust on your Amiga will rub off on you.
The last time I get compliment is at middle school. I graduated from college in 2020
I believe this is because, us men, are not doing enough to create curiosity/interest/atraction for women to be atracted by us and by choices that we've made.
Choices like:
-picking a good masculine cologne that has been reviewed to have been complimented before by women.
-having a good sense of style according to your age and havibg clothes that fit your body, not too skinny not too baggy just right for you.
-having a presence on social media, by this I mean having some kind of professional pictures with you, not selfies but actual photos taken by a photographer or a friend to showcase your fashion style, this is more for online dating
-also having a career, having an income to afford rent or a place of your own, to afford a car so that you can be independent and on your own.
@@timebandit. And once you've done all this, you still won't get any compliments from women, then you'll understand that women are just different creatures. We feel a strong need to compliment women, they feel absolutely no need to compliment us or even appreciate what we do, even when we're lightyears out of their league.
@@SkeleTonHammer don’t do it for the sake of others validation. Feeling good about what you’re doing matters the most mate.
Once in college I happened to take a bus with a colleague I had never talked to. So she knew my face, that I was not a creep or something, etc. We were having a great conversation, and I called her intelligent with all honesty. This changed the way she looked at me. She kept initiating message conversations from time to time. Always very amicable. I definitely could try something, the interest was there. Nothing happened simply due to bad logistics, and that was my last day in that college.
When u approach a woman, youve already established to her that she is attractive. She wants to know what sets her apart from all the other pretty women in the room.
The fact you like the look of her over the others
@@daysgoneby3527 fancy seeing you here days, Have you accepted that you're only an lncel because it's your belief and not because of your looks yet?
Honestly, not much. They're into the same songs, same Netflix shows, have a high sense of entitlement but will run to daddy government the moment someone breathes at them the wrong way.
Exactly
I've never known a woman who didn't appreciate being told she's attractive, no matter how good looking she is. It's not the compliment that's the problem, it's the guy and how he goes about it. If you can't compliment a woman without making her either feel uncomfortable or lose respect for you, not complimenting is probably not going to get you very far either.
No, Alexander is right. Complimenting her puts you in the same sandbox as the invisible boys
@@hopefullyanonymous3466 No, if she doesn’t appreciate your compliment it means you were already in there. If she’s into you she’ll lap up your compliment.
Much of our training on this subject comes from movies. In the movies, a handsome guy tells a gorgeous woman that she is pretty. She then blushes and finds it very romantic and is instantly turned on by the compliment. She then says something like "I am? Nobody has ever told me I'm pretty before!"
This aint reality, guys. If she is gorgeous, she has been told she is gorgeous thousands of times since she was a small child. The Cinderella story is a fantasy only found in the movies. Time to get a grip on reality.
society was raising us to believe these lies
Validation of their beauty to some women, may be white noise, but from my experience they cannot stand being ignored. When they are accustomed to having heads turn when they enter the room.
Never in my life, not even as a child did I ever compliment a girl
Never in my life was I ever in a relationship
go figure xD
You're not born yet :/
@@testing-je7yz rebirth
"You're complimentable."
Guess why I don't.
so glad i'm alone 99% of the time and a monk for over 5 years!
You were sent your own way. Stop capping lol.
Glad you're alone and yet seeking info from a YT psychologist dating coach. 😉
@@thorzyan as do you.
jan jansen optimizing my game brother. Always better yourself.
@@bobmarley4272 That's all you can do, disagree
Look fade with time, dumb last forever.
Him: You’re pretty.
Her: Yeah and the sky is blue. Bye 🙄
High quality woman doesn't use Facebook or Instagram lol
High quality women are extinct.
@@JanFWeh right I was gonna say what’s a high quality woman?
Si You are saying Women shouldn't use social social media? What about men who use them?
@@flandy6166 Men don't shake and show their ass on instagram like women do.
Use tiktok
I like this 😂 it reminds me Madagascar 2 with Motomoto keeps validating Gloria how she is huge. Then Melman came out and tell Motomoto everything about the things he loves about Gloria like those beautiful laughs 😂
That’s my favorite scene in the movie... :)
That's my movie 😂
Ignore the VVomen and treat like she a Non - Sexual object. Treat her like a normal person.
Unable
No you treat her like a sex object and you ask for what you want. Don't be the nice guy by treating her normal and going the friend route. You don't need to validate her but you should be straightforward with your intentions.
Treat them like you want to have sex with them without disrespecting them
Thats hard cuz their personality mostly suck and isnt really that big
"Desperate, lonely orbiters" - brutal 🤣
Never put her on a pedestal
You can put them on a pedestal (if they are pretty and nice), just don't let them know it.
Not going to uselessly feed her ego. Validation comes only when truly deserved.
This always kept me ahead of the curve in the dating market tbh. Great advice
Instead of complimenting her looks overall, compliment something she values. Makeup, clothing style, her hair if she dyes it. And be specific.
Works the best if the compliments are completely unrelated like “i love [a tv show she loves]” because it gives a talking point too
Just never compliment
@@mp4Junkie Oh hell nah, dont do that. She will think you are gay and im not even kidding. Women know guys have no interest in that goofy stuff.
@@MyUniqueHandle. True. A man should spend time on his hobbies, ambitions, and accumulation of wealth... Women like independent men. I found out this a bit too late.
I have to find depth in the average modern woman? Chad wins again.
It really bothers me when guys say that to women. I also think a lot of men need to learn this
Simps
Men are hungry
I don’t think I will ever have a girlfriend. Girls are too hard to get
You can transition, though.
"Oh my god I'm so ugly today" while wearing a nice outfit and makeup and had her hair done
I usually ignore coz she fishing for compliments.
Next time don’t ignore her and tell her “yeah you really look ugly and have lost your taste in being cute”
When you are not in a relationship do not say this.
When you are in a relationship, you can then say this.
This comes across as sincere. This is like someone who never swears, swearing, you know they are genuinely unset/line crossed
This is actually a good explanation
I don't understand this comment. Please rephrase.
@@runreilly you have 2 friends, 1 friend swears like a sailor, the other never swears. When no.1 swears at you because of something you did, its hard to tell if angry or or not. When no.2 swears at you for a similar reason, you know you messed up and can feel it inside you
As a Muslim I would say u are correct in some of what u are saying. That is why islam has women wear hijab and Cover themselves. This stops the compliments coming in full stop. So they ain't conditioned to be desensitised to complements from their husband and it forces them to grow their moral character and personality and prevens arrogance. There is a saying and it goes like this: a Muslim woman wears armour and she only takes it off for her husband. Peace x
Promotion of Islam in a dating advice video. Why not, right? Sigh....
@@RahimRahmat this is not promotion of Islam. Just a different perspective that actually exists in this world and many ppl are living world wide, regardless of race. So why can these ppl replicate this success?
Islam gives practical and workable solutions to real world problems.
Hope u peace love and prosperity sir x
Not a long time ago makeup in the west was just reserved for the "professionals". Well, then the profession spread... or something like that.
@@RahimRahmat why not let others know some great things about Islam
@@schoolworkaccount3887 Gee.... I don't know..... maybe because *this* is not the video or the place??
If I (or even you) wanted to put out some great things about Islam, maybe it's best done in a video about Islam? Maybe, I should try recording my own video to say what I want to say? There are many places to do this kind of things.... the right place and time for everything, you know?
Yup! ♀️ are told everyday that they are attractive. Never kiss their feet by telling them so... and don't expect any compliments from them either. Love yourself instead.
“Has anyone ever told you that you look adequate?...”
_"You look so...barely above average."_
I wish I could remember what channel I was watching when I saw an excellent example of this. A guy had a reply video to a chick doing this very thing, she was scrolling through the comments on her video completely ignoring the positive ones and reacting to only the negative comments. She had 100's of positive comments and 15-20 negative comments, it was crazy.
"You are a hideous mutant."
I like this. A lot.
🤣😂 I'd laugh.
She doesn't want some guy telling her she is pretty. But when it comes from the guy, sometimes, like water in the dessert, she will appreciate it. Make her look for that Oasis and enjoy when she blooms out of the sand giving you epic contrast.
So basically don't give away complements unless it's going to be a two-way street.
Maybe in relationships you still should praise your woman for her other good characteristics more than for her beauty. My ex bf was always talking about how pretty I am and how sexy I am. I was actually quite OK with that up to one point, cus I was insecure about my weight, my body and my face. But when I became secure, his praise became pointless. And even when he praised me for something else, “pretty” was the first thing he would name and then others.
Sorry for mistakes, if there are any, english is not my native (hi from Russia)
well said, that's why If I compliment a women I compliment a characteristic of hers NOT her appearance.
I'm never telling a woman she's beautiful anymore...except she's my WIFE
Tell her once for every three times she validates YOU, otherwise she becomes comfortable and dissatisfied.
Just make yourself in such a way that everyone loves to be around you, personal development is very atractive
Over complimenting a woman's looks is something that I've always done in hopes to getting romantically involved with her. It worked one 1 girl, my ex but lately I've noticed how low quality she was
Don't fed their already way too big egos...Because even the landwhales are now having super high standards thanks to this.
Factss 😭💯
@@SkinnyFlackooBEATS I don't know which app they use, but they use some "checklist" app once they talk to a guy. And one of their "demands", is that the guy is AT LEAST 6"0 tall...
All while themselves can be short as dwarfs.
Anndddd, here's our side of the story (Disclaimer I speak for around 90% of girls out there not including the fishing for compliments ones)
Now
Let's just say you're in a scenario where you and a girl are going getting ready for a party.
She did her makeup, put on her outfit and everything and asks "Do I look good", if u say yes then that's great you're good to go but if u say "No you're ugly" she'll probably feel really bad about it and even cancel going to the party.
And bam you just lost a friend, congrats
Boys don't even matter to us in a "am i pretty" situation (most of the time) but instead about other girls. There are so many other girls out there who only care about looks and then go to personality and unluckily they're usually the popular ones, so if u don't look pretty to them it's all over bullying starts and that's an argument for later.
So obviously the girl decides to wear a dress, put on makeup and might ask if they look pretty looking for an honest but not cruel opinion. And u guys think they're a spoiled brat or it has to do with u (Talk about ego lol)
In short, we're insecure and want one special person to reassure us that there's no reason to be insecure.
But again u guys think thats "spoiled brat behavior and have a big ego" and go on saying we're ugly
@@dear.dhrutii I see, my statement still stands as it is. Furthermore, as a guy, it can go years between getting a compliment from a girl/woman lol.
I always go with "we're good looking". Demonstrates value, because you treat it like it's both obvious for you and her as well as it's bonding by proving your matching your levels in that term.
Lol that 10 min mark
He likes money. We all do.
Well, he needs to pay his bills somehow.
My friend Carlos back home once told a girl: "yeah I guess you're above average but you're no playboy bikini model". I don't know if they dated, but I'm pretty sure he nailed her at some point.
What a great anecdote, you should write an autobiography. 🤥
@@sandersson2813 not a bad idea. Go get yourself a girl man, its really not that hard.
@@sandersson2813 lmao
Alexander, you told us couple videos ago that telling a woman is pretty is actually 1. making compliments to her parents, 2. a time loss, 3. a woman's ego boosting (and boasting), among other things, but I thank you for making me remember this.
As a women I can confirm that this is true! Though I shouldn’t speak for all women. Many of us can also tell if you think we are attractive by the way you look or don’t look at us as well.
The majority i would assume learned it the hard way. Beauty could fade by time but personality doesn’t. It’s a bonus to be attractive but it has to be attached with some good traits.
I've learned this rule very soon. I remember I was a teenager and complimented a very beautiful classmate on her legs. The look of despise in her eyes was instantly. I remember being very confused in the moment thinking what hell I did wrong. In my mind I was just being nice
Man you won me over with the first line of this video! I learned it the hard way, but I'll never forget!
AS SOMEONE ONCE SAID, " BEAUTY IS ONLY SKIN DEEP" WELL THATS DEEP ENOUGH FOR ME !
Your advice rings true
The only thing I would add is that if I like someone, then a sincere compliment from them will put me over the moon. But if someone I don't know/ have no interest in gives me a compliment it just makes me suspicious of their intentions
It would actually be nice of her if there was anything to be praised other than her phone tapping skills.
ROFLWAFFLE oh the bullshit of life!! Yesterday a woman rejected or "rejected" me at least(going round and round with her but she has self esteem issues) because I didn't tell her she's pretty. She made her hair all nice and hot and but she knows I don't care if she calls me handsome and she didn't say that was why but it was obvious I needed to say it. UGH and it's valentine's day.😫😫😫 She says she sees a therapist and I think that therapist shouldn't be allowed to give therapy anymore. LOL but then again my I.Q. of 117 isn't definitely that high since it was just a 50 question test and I guess it should've been at least 50 questions longer so margin of error with that if 25 points means I'm kind of dumb.😂🤣💩👀😱
Whenever I see a hot girl I talk to her in a calm fashion and figure out her personality and talents and compliment her on those things
But when I see an average girl I smile at her and make her feel special and compliment her on her looks like her dressing style and makeup this strategy has helped me a lot with women in general
...good for you. Shows emotional intelligence
It's better to compliment on her style, or make up rather than her appearence perse
A girl posts selfies of herself on social media, some suggestions for good ways to stand out:
1. Jeez your such a poser aren’t you
2. What’s up with the weird background
Anyone agree with me here? Anyone have other better suggestions?
Yeah just don't say anything. Being a narcissist on social media is behaviour that you shouldn't reward. Ignore it, if you really want to talk to her message her directly in her private inbox
@@ctb1977 they complain about having tons of messages mate.
I would say don’t be offensive if you’re gonna comment on her photos.
Make sure it’s humorous lil bit.
I would personally block you.
No men use social media; just simps and orbiters.
I just make fun of them. Some women dont like that in all honesty. I stay away from the ones who dont tease me back. No fun :(
I've noticed this when it comes to artwork i commission. Its dull to me when random people from twitter compliment the works I get but when I show my friends, I feel so good showing them
i don't even know why i'm watching these for i never told a girl she's pretty nor did i ever hit an anyone.
So true bro sooooo true ,I ignore them and not so nice
Stop chasing women.
Stop validating them.
They're strong and independent, fish and bicycle.
Ignore females, acquire bitcoin.
Oh no
To your point and previous points in other blogs, dating apps make this harder, because there's not much to work off of besides her looks and basic/general info
I think there's two ways to tell a girl she's good looking...
1) the overly expressive & nervous beta type who is expecting instant sex from such a brilliant remark
2) the non reactive alpha type, who is passing a compliment but continues to test her and show he isn't phased by her appearance, he's not charmed just because she's hot.
I think number 2 is perfectly fine and actually could even be seen as a back handed compliment that puts her feet on the ground, at least for that interaction anyway... Which is the whole point.
Spot on. Im squarely in nr 2
Honestly the whole "alpha" and "beta" mentality is really toxic and useless. Just do whatever you want whenever you feel like, you don't need to categorize yourself that is based on sexism.
I stopped handing out physical complements on Tinder a long time ago. I don't even do it in response to a complement.
I disagree, women's self-esteem is usually damaged, even with all the instagram's simps. They are still looking for real life validation, so if you are a high quality man your attention is still enjoyed if you are not beeing cringy using stupid compliments.
They like validation, but they don't see those men as dating prospects. It's so obvious what your real intentions are: Sex. Women already know if they're pretty or not, like alex said you're just stating the obvious and with that you're exposing your true intentions. It's gross.
@@Repsforjesus67 if you are a high quality man, you already know the girls you are trying to date, so they know what you are looking for. So when you compliment her property (not necessarily the way he looks), in the appropriate moment when she's opening to you, then you show your intentions and you have a great chance to success.
I just mean compliment is still a powerful weapon if done properly.
He’s so right about having standards and the unique and earned compliment thing….
what about women that leaves their husband for someone who made them feel "special" by telling all sorts of compliments ?
That's just an excuse to leave him.
This is a big help. Thanks Alex!
Devour her beauty with your male gaze. Don’t state the obvious...
The biggest flaw in terms of thinking about how to act towards a woman you like is to think you should act towards her like you want her to act towards you.
I do day game, and always open with a compliment. I.e. you look nice, you have beautiful eyes..
8 times out of 10 I’ve turned her cheeks red and she’s showing signs of nervousness. But I always follow with a tease about something she’s wearing.
It seems to work for me.
8/10 that’s really high.
That only works if she finds you attractive. For you that seems to be the case. Good for you then.
Treat her like a celebrity and she will treat you like a fan
For some reason I had telling her all this compliments inside my head, but I am not the type of dude telling a girl straight in her face
She is in love with me now
That your masculine energy saving you from being a beta nice guy
Sometimes you can't stop thinking about how beautiful she is but I don't say it. She hears it often
7:50
Don't give compliments without back up from it.
Also most women are well aware that most of their appearance is completely fake and not real. 🤣
It’s true lol
@Angel Rose that is why it is called lust.
Love is much more complex and requires care at the base of it all.
@Angel Rose yes....
That instant attraction which we feel, considered lust, is very similar to when you see anything that is beautiful that you want to own. Like a nice car, the only difference is that your have the biological trigger to breed combined.
Beauty is the most attractive feature solely because it is the easiest to guage the quality of the item. Example, a beautiful apples is usually more delicious than an ugly apple.
I am no angel, when i see a beautiful girl I like it but I know that people can be rotten under the beautiful skin.
I hope it helps.
43 seconds and this is a great video already.
gonna stop telling my wife she looks hot, lol
Stay stoic gents
You can't lose with Marcus A-dog.
I've had positive results from it where the girl wasn't conventionally 'pretty' (don't judge a book by its cover and all that). I don't think she'd heard it before in years, if ever.
Yeah, but on the other hand - why would you want to be with a girls if she's not pretty?
@@NonExistChannel as he said, don't judge a book by its cover... A girl is not only attractive just for looks
@@PipeRiosL So you are saying me I should abandon my biology and get with the not-good-looking?
@@NonExistChannel She was pretty to me.
@@NonExistChannel she may not be between 8-10 in looks but if her personality and traits make her stand out of the crowd then am interested.
Alexander you are on point! I also find that if a woman has a certain look, and is used to validation, she will think every glance, every hello means a guy likes her. Maybe he is just being friendly because he is nice to everyone, but she is not his type.
Men: OMG, you are so beautiful!
Alexander: You need to be different to stand out, she has already heard that
Men: You look like such a special kind-hearted angel. You really are a gift from god.
Alexander: ...
One of the few things I can confidently say I have never done 😁. Even when they were clearly fishing for compliments - because guess what, that displays precisely the type of insecurity you don't want to engage with.
Rip the thumbnail girl ☠️
Ikr, I don’t know why he came up with that lil girl. He would’ve had a better looking face or used his own face instead. I feel bad for her.
Savagery
Hate to break it to you guys, but if telling a woman she is beautiful ruins your chances with her, you never had any chance anyway. If you think shes pretty, say it, if she hates you for it, move on. She wasn't the one.
I get that you must not put women on a pedestal but the alternative you're giving is still a cop out and very dishonest. This is why in divorce you hear things like "he now hates my writing/charity work etc." No man is attracted to a woman's passion. Secondly you will find that the majority of people are capable of kindness, compassion, respectability etc. given the right conditions. The people who lack these qualities are in the extreme for example pathological liars are usually victims of some trauma or have a mental condition.
I am not saying this wont work it will work but it is also just another pick up strategy and it is not sustainable in the long run. It's a lot liked the 'similar interests' strategy which always backfires. Women really want to believe men who employ these strategies because they're also conditioned to think that their womanhood and virtue is not enough so to attract men they must know sports, travel, understand the trans-pacific treaty of whatever etc.
Your advice is based on the modern kind of "we are best friends"/"we are partners kind of relationship". Don't con women gents, if a woman wants to believe that her helping poor communities or her short stories are a bigger factor in her attractiveness then her ass then she lying to herself. Tell her that: "you have a pretty face and a great ass, that's why I am here, I will tolerate your writing and I will try my best with the charity because that's what relationships are about"
Can't agree less on this. It is a very natural part of flirting. I'm a man, I do what I like, not what some wannabe dictator on UA-cam tells me to do. Killing chances you say? The smile after giving her a compliment says otherwise, as well as my experience. I don't compliment her to get her attention or something like that, my inner self just tells me to do that. It just feels right. Like reproducing. I don't need to think about that, it is just a feeling that needs to be lived.
exactly! my parents have been married for more than 2 decades and my dad still tells my mom that she’s beautiful almost every day, started doing it before they even started dating. and it hasn’t once been a problem and it always brings a smile to her face.
men who treat women like test subjects, like they’re not normal human beings, will never get far with them. stupid fucks lol.
So true! My husband is the only guy that noticed things about me other then my looks, he would compliment my creativity and art skills, sense of humor, and just how good our conversations were. The beauty compliments came along a little later, and it’s not every moment .. it’s usually in the moment when he’s looking at me and he will randomly say how beautiful he thinks I am.
Loving your videos Alexander!
Totally agree. And you're creating a hierarchy.
My girlfriend tells me I'm pretty every day.
Guys: you need to understand that women use compliments as currency. Notice that a woman's Instagram is FULL of women praising each other. I was told this is because they think of compliments as something that can be paid back if they need it. So, when a woman compliments you, it's because she WANTS something. If you compliment her, that's how she takes it - you WANT something from her.
I love your videos but that tumbnail is definetely too much, she's clearly underage.
Love you keep it real. To all men who were lucky enough to land on your channel please take notes. This guy knows exactly what he’s talking about.