Just addressing a few comments: it is sheer coincidence for this particular video to appear today on Reddit's 'Blackout Day'! I have, obviously, collated these posts over the past few days - I can't churn out videos at a cr1TiKaL pace. I hope dearly that a peaceful resolution is found and subreddits continue to provide us with all their joy 😊 and also obviously because with Yahoo Answers dead and Twitter being run into the ground by Elon imma out be out of a damn job here wtf
@@bonecanoe86 Reddit is intentionally pricing out all the people who made third-party apps so they'll be forced to shut down and every user will be forced onto the official app. When one of the third party developers had a meeting with them to discuss what could be done in terms of pricing or decreasing API calls, they gave him no useful input. They then talked shit about him to the user base, essentially saying that he tried to blackmail them (he posted audio of the phone call, proving that they were lying about him). This change impacts people's ability to moderate subreddits effectively since the official app lacks a lot of moderation tools that third party apps have implemented, and the official app also lacks accessibility features that third party apps have, so Reddit will be inaccessible for the visually disabled. They're basically unable to compete with the third party apps on many functions but are going to annihilate them with almost no notice despite having worked together for many years. It's shitty on multiple fronts. It isn't wild that they'd want money for usage of their API but they are absolutely pricing it this way to kill these developers' projects. Even RIF (which is extremely minimalistic and has less impact than the official app!) is being priced out and destroyed.
i once bumped into someone while walking and i tried to say “oh shoot” and “i’m sorry” at the same time. it came out as “oh soup” and im still cringing to this day
I once tried to calmly say "I'm going to get some pain killers" and "I'm going to get some pain pills" and end up yelling "I'M GOING TO GET THE PILL KILLERS". My mom and best friend laughed so hard, which caused me to laugh, I had water come out of my nose.
I remember a few weeks ago, I tried to say to my partner "I can't handle this hot weather" and "I can't handle the heat" and my stupid brain decided to merge them together and it came out as: "I can't handle the HOWA HOWEE" Literally cackling on the floor for about 5 minutes straight
Reminds me of one time IN THR MIDDLE OF WINTER. I was going to say “It’s so fucking cold” and “I wanna get inside” Ended up saying: “I want to fuck inside”
My wife works in pathology at the hospital and was on the phone to a doctor giving him blood test results. He said thank you, she was going to reply with "you're welcome", but actually said "You wanker". He said "I'm sorry, what?", then she hung up.
Today, my history teacher tried to say "people" and "historian" at the same time when talking about interpretations, and ended up saying "pisstorian". He quickly followed that with after a slight pause and saying, "I don't want to know what *that* is."
I once tried to thank my coworker who kindly made some coffee for me by (somehow) saying "Thanks! You're a sweetheart." and "Bless" at the same time. ...I ended up saying "Thanks! you're swiss." instead lmao
My mom did that to my sister and me: she wanted to say “did you get enough to eat, my little sweeties?” And “did you get enough to eat, my little family?” And wound up with “did you get enough to eat, my little fatties?” We STILL laugh about that, 20+ years on 😂
My friend once said "I'm gonna go take a dump" and "I have to use your bathroom" at the same time And ended up saying "I'm gonna take your bathroom" It's still an inside joke between us 'til this day
Honestly, I feel like that should just be their code name. It's much shorter, so if she needs to call both of them at the same time, she can say "G R A V Y" instead of the much longer "A V A A N D G R A C E"
I was listening to my friends tell a story. I tried to reply with "thats crazy!" or "thats insane!", but ended up yelling, "THATS A CRANE" at them, and they all stared at me in confusion for a few seconds 😭
One time a friend of mine tried to make an excuse while on call not to go to a party with me and accidentally tried to say "I left my grandma outside" and "I forgot to turn off my stove" and said in a hurry "I left my grandma turned on" and hung up, later texted back, profusely apologizing.
So, one day I was in the band room at school, and like 3 people were talking to me at once. I tried to say "hang on" and "shush yourself" at the same time. I ended up saying "hang yourse-" and then I stopped, even though probably no one heard me.
one time i tried to say "you're very welcome" and "my pleasure" to a customer i helped find the bread isle _i said "you're very pleasured" to a poor elderly woman_
Recently I was at work and it was pretty quiet so a female customer and I had a chat for a good 30 minutes. Being socially awkward, I had already planned to end with "It was nice to chat with you (too if nessacary)" pretty much once the conversation started. However, she threw a spanner in the works when she said "It was lovely to meet you" and my response was "I love you too"
I remember being at the store and wanting to ask my mom to buy some popcorn. For whatever reason I thought it'd be funny to randomly scramble the letters, and without thinking about it I shouted:"MUM CAN WE GET SOME COCPORN"
One time I was trying to ask my boyfriend "do you need to use the bathroom" and last second my brain decided to ask him if he had to pee instead so i ended up asking him "do you need to use the pee?". Died over that one for a while there.
One time I came to class late and tried saying "My bad mister, I slept in", but I was listening to music on my way there and still had my earbuds in. So instead of saying that, the lyrics I was humming mixed into what I was trying to say and I ended up blurting out "My baddie mister" in front of everyone. Not a single person in that class has allowed me to forget about it (we're all good friends and have a groupchat)
My high school algebra teacher, while talking to a group of guys about their upcoming soccer game, tried to say "Kick 'em in the shins!" but realized that sounded too mean and switched halfway through to "Kick those balls!" Yeah, he just ended up telling them enthusiastically to "kick them in the balls!"
I was helping my mom with dinner and I wanted to ask if we were gonna need spoons or forks. Instead it came out as “Do we need sporks or-” stopped myself, we both laughed about it, then I tried to ask again and said “Foons”. Her laughter was soul-healing.
Once I was trying to say something about cults and countries to my dad and I managed to mix up the two words and very loudly, whilst staring directly into his eyes, said "C*NT" and then became so embarrassed that I couldn't say anything for 5 minutes. Thankfully we are British so it's slightly less bad than if we were American because apparently it's more insulting over there
tbh as a brit, c*nt is part of my daily vocabulary at this point. Either my relationship has godly humour or im a social cretin that has lost the ability to socialise normally. I dread the day i accidentally say something in public that i forgot is actually offensive.
I'm American and I've never actually heard someone say cunt. I've heard it's a sexist thing for men to call women, but I often say it when I'm frustrated.
I don’t know why but these videos specifically make me laugh so hard, I thought people were exaggerating when they comment “I can’t breathe” on a video
I watched a video of someone reacting to the "pregananant" video once, and he was laughing so much that it made it 100 times funnier to me. It actually made me fall off the sofa I was sleeping on at the time, and I was crying and choking so hard that I ended up in coughing fits until I almost threw up from gagging so much. And that was even though I kept pausing the video to take breaks! I never knew laughing like that was possible. It's dangerous xD
I ended up laughing like this at one of the edits I made in one of my own videos, to the point that I became genuinely concerned about my inability to breathe and the violent coughing that followed once I could breathe again. I was on a Skype call with my ex-girlfriend at the time, who didn't know I was watching back the video, because I was initially watching her draw over the call. She fell out of her chair laughing at *_my_* laugh, and was still laughing a bit when she got back to her desk to ask what was wrong with her drawing.
One of my neighbors came around and asked to borrow an egg for a recipe, and as he was leaving I tried to say “have a great day” but I was still thinking about the egg and I realized “have a great egg” was halfway out my mouth, so I tried to save it, and just sputtered “have a gay egged!” Still scared to look him in the eye to this day
Was outside with my mum, tried to say, "I'm scared of a bird pooping on me" but my brain mushed 'Bird' and 'poop' and what I said was "I'm scared of a boob"
I work as a cashier and when people buy rotisserie chicken from the deli I usually ask “you want the chicken in a bag?” or “is a bag alright?” I mashed them together one time and said “chicken bag YEAH!”
Reminds me of one time when my friend who apparently works at a KFC place. She was going to say “here’s a bag with chicken” Instead LOUDLY proclaimed “HAVE A CHICKEN DAY”
My friend's mum asked me what fast food place I would prefer. I tried to say "I don't care" and "It doesn't matter" at the same time. Accidentally told her that "I don't matter"
i think this is genuinely my favourite subject for a video, ever. full stop. i was in tears halfway through the video and wheezing when it was done. jesus christ.
My friend and I were playing a game a few minutes ago where he pretended to be a giant monster. He was trying to say "destroying" and "attacking" at the same time and he ended up saying "I'm a giant monster, and I'm distracting the city!"
Once I went to the doctors for being sick, and being the mess I was, I tried debating whether or not to be casual and say "whats up" or "Good morning, its great to see you (????)". For some reason they mixed up and so I looked my doctor into the eyes and said with a weak and raspy voice, "What _is_ soup?"
A colleague of mine once tried to say bye to an English customer, but she accidentally mixed it up with the Dutch word for bye which is 'doei'. She just looked the guy dead in the eyes and said: "D... DIE."
@@irishuisman1450 I told about what happened to another colleague of mine. Within 3 days she said the same thing to a foreign customer. Either our workplace in Eindhoven is cursed, or just telling about what happened is a curse in and of itself. If it's the latter.. I'm sorry
@@bigtrollybigtrolly I think being bilingual is a curse lmaoo. I'm also Dutch and worked in England for a while. Nah, the random dumb af sentences that left my mouth sometimes... I'm sure other bilinguals have the same issue XD
I jumbled an entire sentence yesterday. I was trying to very enthusiastically make a point to my friend about something and all the words came out at once leaving me with “wereg in the waf ga by da ba!” shouted very directly into his face with the intensity of a heated lawyer in a court room. I just kept smiling like what I had said made perfect sense. He blinked and hit me with “you’re right, I can’t speak simlish.”
Was once helping a girl in my class with some math work. Now i have no idea what words she mixed up but i do know it ended with her looking at me dead in the eyes and going "you're a smart chicken arent ya" I will never forget the weirdest complement ive ever been given in my life
This isn't even weird to me, "chicken" is a term of endearment where I'm from. So is "hen" and, best of all, "cock". We just really like poultry I guess.
I went to wave goodbye to a dear friend recently, but was tired and distracted and flipped him off instead. I'm normally really lovely to him. He greeted me the next time I saw him by doing the same. We're good.
Remembering the time I tried to say "pretend" and "practice" at the same time and ended up saying "pretactice" instead. It's not even that funny but TO THIS DAY every time it crosses my mind, my brain conjures up this image of a little cactus under the desert sun to accompany the word and it sends me into absolute hysterics.
I went with my parents to meet some extended family at a restaurant for my 12(-ish) birthday. I was excitedly explaining to my parents how badly I wanted a “big stitch” plushie for my birthday. Instead of saying “big stitch”, I said “I want a b*tch plushie!!” My parents (and I, at the time) were pretty intensely religious, so I froze and my face went red. Luckily they thought it was a really silly mistake and we all laughed, but I thought I committed like the most atrocious sin on the planet lol.
One time me and my friend were baking muffins in the kitchen. We left to do something for a little while but her mom was doing things in the kitchen so I poked my head in and was deciding between asking "Are the muffins ready" and "Have the muffins baked yet?". I totally blanked and screamed at this poor woman "BROMPHIN?!"
Lmao. It would be so intrusive and intriguing To say “That’s gay” to a LGBTQ person who isn’t even gay. Random explanation: One time someone randomly proclaimed “that’s gay” to me while me & my brother were just hugging after not meeting for years. IT WAS AWKWARD. THEY EVEN MISTAKEN ME AS A GUY- i’m A FEMALE NOT A GUY
A customer asked me for a refill of water for his tea and I noticed it was my favourite tea he had in his cup. I planned on saying to him “you picked the best one” (in reference to the tea) and I just said “you pissed” with a blank stare. My face immediately turned beet red as I tried to explain myself and he and my coworkers laughed at me.
One time I was tired and I tried to say "It's doesn't matter" and "I don't mind" at the same time, I ended up creepily saying "It doesn't mind" to my grandma.
Tried to say “he has the longest time so far!” And “he’s lasted the longest” at the same time while at a bull ride machine at a school party. Instead, my dumbass shouted “HE’S LONGEST THE LASTEST!” And I still facepalm at myself from it 💀
My friend working as wait staff was thinking how she wished one of the tables would be quiet, whilst putting a very hot plate on another table and said seriously "It's very hot, so be quiet." then immediately walked away 😂 Best I've got is mixing up "no problem " and "you're welcome" so telling a customer on the phone "your problem." before promptly hanging up.
Had a friend who was a singer for a local rock band. When he gave me tickets for his show I was between saying “ sing your heart out” and “sing your voice out”. Ended up accidentally saying “sing your horse” 🐴
One time my biology teacher, while describing how a cell worked, tried to say ‘little holes’ and ‘pores’ at the same time. It came out ‘little whores.’ He had a good laugh about it alongside us.
I once had a roommate who worked at McDonald’s and she had to say “welcome to McDonald’s, are you going to be using the mobile app today?” Now something about her is that (outside of work) she liked to jokingly bug people with a Mickey Mouse impression to the point where that shit grew lore. So one morning she accidentally said “Welcome to mobile app, are you going to be using your McDonald’s today?” In a Mickey Mouse voice to some random stranger
When I was 7 year old I was with my mum in the store and I bumped into a tall person I was trying to say “oops” and “sorry” and ended up saying sup The look of pure happiness on the guys face still confuses me
I mixed up some words recently: baking instructions and baking directions. The result? Baking DESTRUCTIONS I'd like to think I'm better at baking than that implies.
I recently had an appointment at my doctors. I tend to pick up on other peoples accents halfway through a conversation with them without me noticing. When the appointment was finished, I tried to say ‘thank you’, but was anticipating a ‘you’re welcome’ and ended up yelling in my poor doctors face “YOU’RE welcome” in a vaguely Eastern European accent. Then I just walked out. 💀
I was once cycling home with a watermelon in a bag hanging off my handlebars and it was pulling me around. Some people moved to the side to let me pass on a thin pathway. What I wanted to say was something along the lines of "Oh thanks, but I can't cycle very straight right now because of this watermelon and I don't want to knock into you". What came out was "Oh no thanks, I have a melon"
I played trombone all through middle school, and once a kid poked his head into the aisle on the bus and I hit him with my case. I tried to say "are you ok" and "sorry" and ended up very aggressively telling him "are you sorry!" Never living it down
Now that reminds me of one time when I was gonna order.. when I was gonna ask for a “Caramel Macchiato” My brain thought of something completely else I ended up saying: Can I have a mosquito please? 💀 And then 4 mins later bumbing into my friend and I tried to say “OPSIE DAISY” and “FUCK ME NOT AGAIN” at the same time. I loudly proclaimed publicly. “OH FUCK ME DAISY” 😭 HIS NAME IS ARON.
One time, I tried to say "I'm in Spain without the P" (like "I'm insane") but I somehow ended up with "I'm insane without the D" well that one got passed around the group chat in no time at all 💀 You should make a video solely from UA-cam comments (if you haven't already. I'm methodically watching through all of them now, I've only just discovered your channel but it's hilarious and I love your content)
I was once talking to my brothers at a wedding or something that we were all at and I was trying to say "let's take a seat" and "let's sit" and i totally told them "let's take a shit" and no one in our family swears and I just looked at them and we all burst out laughing and I was like "let's not talk about that again" 😂
Now that reminds me of one time when I was gonna order.. when I was gonna ask for a “Caramel Macchiato” My brain thought of something completely else I ended up saying: Can I have a mosquito please? 💀 And then 4 mins later bumbing into my friend and I tried to say “OPSIE DAISY” and “FUCK ME NOT AGAIN” at the same time. I loudly proclaimed publicly. “OH FUCK ME DAISY” 😭 HIS NAME IS ARON.
Swede visiting Ireland, eating lunch. Needed to use the bathroom so got the attention of a waitress to ask where the restroom was. My handful of braincells got spooked just as I opened my mouth and out came "can I borrow your toilet?"
I rarely laugh out loud at UA-cam videos, but your videos make me genuinely laugh an embarrassing amount. I was on the couch while my brother was watching a very sad scene in Breaking Bad and I just started cracking up, I had to move to my room to finish the video.
My sister used to work at Giant Tiger years ago and one night while making the usual “we’re closing in fifteen minutes” speech (which was supposed to begin with “good evening Giant Tiger shoppers”) she said “Good evening Giant tigers”, panicked and then slammed the phone so hard down on the receiver the sound went through the whole store. The cherry on top was this whole thing happened just as I was coming into the store to pick her up so I heard every embarrassed word of it 😂
@@Blazdragon34 you know what? I honestly don’t remember because I was busy dying of laughter 😂 I don’t think there were many in the store tho because it was so close to closing time. I’ll have to ask her and see if she remembers 😅
@@Blazdragon34 I did end up asking her and she said there were a couple that got second hand embarrassment from her because they were near enough to actually see her do it all 😂 she also said it wasn’t the first time she ... shall we say “misused” the PA system there either 😂🤦♀️
I would be so confused as a customer there wondering why an employee had used the intercom to just say “good evening giant tigers” and nothing else…followed by an ominous slam💀
One time I was in class talking about our math textbook that I really didn't like. I had several problems that I had gotten wrong simply because of the wording, and I was talking about this to my class. I tried to say, "this textbook is really badly worded." Instead, what I ended up saying was, "this textbook is really wordly badded." in front of my whole class. I couldn't stop laughing for the next five minutes.
I asked my dad for a drink of his water cup since I didn’t have one. I have no FLIPPIN clue what I was trynna say, but I said,” Moshie” while making eye contact. I was also smiling hunched over after waking up from a 3 hour nap. This happened months ago and I’m still confused. 🤷♀️
I was trying to say “person” but somehow started saying character and stopped halfway through and ended up saying “sometimes I feel like the only carrot”
I have two of these stories. So, I was on call with a few friends and we're playing a horror game. Its pretty late at night, I just drank a Caprisun and an energy drink. My friend laughs at something another said and her giggle sounded very menacing. I went to say giggle and chuckle, but ending up telling her she has a "devious chickle" 💀 The second one happened between me and my mother. Whenever I grab something, I usually say "snatch" or "yoink". Tried to say both and ended up shouting "SNOINK" My mother now uses it in her daily speech.
This reminds of one tongue twister “I slit the sheet, the sheet I slit. Upon the slitted sheet I sit.” I think the problem speaks for itself especially when you’re doing this as a vocal warm-up for a musical with a youth theatre company.
"I slit the sheet the sheet I slit Upon the slitted sheet I sit" "I slit the sheet the sheet I slit upon the slitted sheet I sit "I slit the sheet the sleet I shi
Matt, I know you don’t like to do too many of the same type of video but I think I speak for everyone when I say that I am BEGGING you to do more of these. They are side-splitting. ❤❤❤
The other day my friend and I were having a discussion about the new Zelda game, and I somehow tried to say "Twitter" and "Link" at the same time, and I ended up saying "Twink," thus causing both of us to fall over in hysterics
When my sister’s cat gets a hairball, he starts wheezing, and once I tried to THINK “are you okay” and I’m so glad I didn’t say anything, cuz if I did I would’ve just yelled “Happy Birthday!”
My friend once wanted to use 2 german slang words. "ne"=no and "digga"=bro, which would together mean something like "come on, really?". He ended up screaming the N word really loudly
Once I tried to wish farewell to my joyfriends with an "I love you." Brain tried to end it with a "babes" and "boos" at the same time so I said "I love you, boobs."
Yesss, I've been waiting for this one. Part 1 almost made me pee myself. I tried to show it to my mom and after 20 seconds she was legit like "This is actually too funny for me to watch. I'm going to hurt myself laughing" and then she left.
I worked at Chick-fil-A for a while, and when it got really late at night, I would lose all ability to function or form sentences. There was one time I was working the drive-thru later in the evening when I tried to say "have a nice day" and "have a nice night," so instead I said "Have a nice DIE" followed by me staring them blankly in the eyes as they drove away, having no idea how to apologize.
My friend was talking about how a bunch of old games are being remade and he meant to say “I bet the people who used to play those are having their minds blown” but instead he said “I bet the people who used to play those are blowing their brains out.”
This series is what got me on this channel in the first place, my stomach hurts from laughing so much XD Worst one I ever did was when I worked in a pharmacy and my 2 main sentences working register besides greeting and closing, was "What's the last name/date of birth/spelling?" and "I need a mix!" (what we called suspended meds usually given to children; the pharmacist had to mix them but we had to scan them and bring them to the reconstitution station). Well I got a mix one day, was rather distracted because I had like 2 different orders going at once, and brought the mix over to the station and shouted across the pharmacy "WHAT'S THE DATE OF B-MIX?!" across the pharmacy. everyone turned and looked at me shouting confused, corrected myself, then burst out laughing, including the pharmacist giving me the mix
Once at my school I was talking to a friend and tried to say 'geez Louis!' And 'Jesus!' at the same time and I loudly said 'Jesus Louisus!' To the entire cafeteria. This phrase is now used commonly among my family when we are surprised.
Funny I had an experience along the lines of this my friends and I joke about. I was taking a hands on jewelry-making course as an elective two semesters ago in college. For the first or second to last project of the year I got to the building and started working at 10am, and time slowly ticked until it was about 10pm and I had awhile to go. After almost an entire day of working, a girl from a different jewelry course came to work on their project. We eventually sparked up conversation after awhile of working in silence, and it lead to me asking her about her major. She responded with aerospace, and because I noticed her shirt that read "women in aerospace" earlier I had planned on saying that I saw you shirt. Somehow in my exhausted dialogue I mixed up "I saw your shirt" and something else (probably incoherent, I honestly can't remember) to form the amazing response: "Oh yeah, I saw you shart". She looked at me, obviously confused, but I tried my best to play it off as if nothing happened and she misheard. I faked noticing her confusion and "repeated" that I saw her shirt. After she left 30-ish minutes later I had to sat down on the floor and take a moment to think about how I accidentally told I girl I saw her shart. There's a reason my friends now sometimes call me the rizzler after that master play.
Time to bring back my one which wasn't even that bad, but still haunts me to this day. One day at work, I was greeting someone as they walked in. I went to say "Good morning!", then realised I was unsure of the time and didn't know if it was still morning, so I changed it to simply "Hello!" Instead, however, I said a mix of the two and managed to cheerfully say "Gellowing! 😊"
I was walking with my friend to a cafe when she saw a fluffy dog, the owner very nicely allowed my friend to pet the dog. In her mind, there were two sentences. “She’s so fluffy!” and “She’s so chubby!” My friend ended up saying “She’s so plushie!”
I have a terrible habit of mixing “that’s ok” and “you’re good” when I’m at work and I keep telling customers “that’s good” when they ask me if they can do certain things. Like a lady asked if she could get her sunglasses from her car. I said “that’s good”. 😀
I did 4:23 once. I was in Germany and since I'm learning German I try to use it every time I get a chance. So that one day I entered the bakery and tried to say "Hallo" but my brain was still in English mode so it started with "Hi". What got through my mouth was a loud "Heil-o". I tried very hard to not facepalm myself and stuck to English to buy my bread.
The original was one of the first videos by you I watched, it’s neat to see a sequel Edit: just had a cursed memory. My friend made a drawing of a horse and tried to say “horse” and “pony” at the same time. She said “H*RNY”
@@Lokear I was 7, (friend was 12) I had no idea why my mom (who was the art teacher) was laughing so hard I remembered it recently and realized why it was so funny
Your hype attitude followed by immediately going to the next joke always makes me laugh so hard I sometimes forget to breathe, and I thank you (And the people that post these jokes) for that. I can always count on this community to brighten my day!
Just addressing a few comments: it is sheer coincidence for this particular video to appear today on Reddit's 'Blackout Day'! I have, obviously, collated these posts over the past few days - I can't churn out videos at a cr1TiKaL pace. I hope dearly that a peaceful resolution is found and subreddits continue to provide us with all their joy 😊 and also obviously because with Yahoo Answers dead and Twitter being run into the ground by Elon imma out be out of a damn job here wtf
That is going to hurt you 😢
Reddit can't leave us without the goattt
I'm out of the loop, what the hell is "Blackout Day"?
It's JOEVER
@@bonecanoe86 Reddit is intentionally pricing out all the people who made third-party apps so they'll be forced to shut down and every user will be forced onto the official app. When one of the third party developers had a meeting with them to discuss what could be done in terms of pricing or decreasing API calls, they gave him no useful input. They then talked shit about him to the user base, essentially saying that he tried to blackmail them (he posted audio of the phone call, proving that they were lying about him).
This change impacts people's ability to moderate subreddits effectively since the official app lacks a lot of moderation tools that third party apps have implemented, and the official app also lacks accessibility features that third party apps have, so Reddit will be inaccessible for the visually disabled. They're basically unable to compete with the third party apps on many functions but are going to annihilate them with almost no notice despite having worked together for many years.
It's shitty on multiple fronts. It isn't wild that they'd want money for usage of their API but they are absolutely pricing it this way to kill these developers' projects. Even RIF (which is extremely minimalistic and has less impact than the official app!) is being priced out and destroyed.
i once bumped into someone while walking and i tried to say “oh shoot” and “i’m sorry” at the same time. it came out as “oh soup” and im still cringing to this day
😭😭😭
I see that as an absolute win
i might start saying oh soup because i love it
what did they say in response?
Lol
Imagine being the guy that got “ *FLONG* ” yelled at them in the middle of their sentence
No one will know how I got these likes >:)
That's absolutely hillary 😭
Edit: bro i was try'na say hilarious wtf ☠️ 😭
That would be- *FLONG*
"and then, while I was walking out of th-"
*"FLONG"*
"You know, this one time I---"
" *FLONG* "
awkward silence
Imagine bumping into someone and just yell "ARE YOU COOL"
*nic cage energy intensifies*
average highschool experience
Sounds like a modern day way of saying are you ok tbh
@@andynachos2045 yea kinda
Followed by "BRUV!"
I once tried to calmly say "I'm going to get some pain killers" and "I'm going to get some pain pills" and end up yelling "I'M GOING TO GET THE PILL KILLERS". My mom and best friend laughed so hard, which caused me to laugh, I had water come out of my nose.
At Least You Didn’t Say “Pain Pain”
Gotta protect your family against the pill killers
one man's vocal flub is another man's free band name
Better than grabbing the killer pills.
I remember a few weeks ago, I tried to say to my partner "I can't handle this hot weather" and "I can't handle the heat" and my stupid brain decided to merge them together and it came out as: "I can't handle the HOWA HOWEE"
Literally cackling on the floor for about 5 minutes straight
Reminds me of one time IN THR MIDDLE OF WINTER.
I was going to say “It’s so fucking cold” and “I wanna get inside”
Ended up saying:
“I want to fuck inside”
😂😂😂😂😂😂
the HOWA HOWEE
@@catergamer1 I just absolutely love that
HOWA HOWEE I'M CACKLING TOO😭😭
The delivery of “And. I. Just. Said. BUTTER.” was incredible 😂😂😂
100 50 40 30 20 10 BUTTER
1:01 I don’t know what I’d been expecting, but it was NOT just “butter”
My wife works in pathology at the hospital and was on the phone to a doctor giving him blood test results. He said thank you, she was going to reply with "you're welcome", but actually said "You wanker". He said "I'm sorry, what?", then she hung up.
but was she wrong, though?
🤣🤣🤣
😂😂
🤣🤣🤣💀
lmao
Today, my history teacher tried to say "people" and "historian" at the same time when talking about interpretations, and ended up saying "pisstorian". He quickly followed that with after a slight pause and saying, "I don't want to know what *that* is."
LMAO
they study the history of piss, obviously
Charon pfp ong‼️‼️
Oh my lord.
Lmao!! I’m dead!
I once tried to thank my coworker who kindly made some coffee for me by (somehow) saying "Thanks! You're a sweetheart." and "Bless" at the same time.
...I ended up saying "Thanks! you're swiss." instead lmao
NOO I DON'T WANT TO BE FROM SWITZERLAND 😭😭😭
Thank you for always taking a neutral stance in any major conflict
the cold, hard truth
Assigned Swiss at coffee break
I would of replied with "no I'm trans"
My mom did that to my sister and me: she wanted to say “did you get enough to eat, my little sweeties?” And “did you get enough to eat, my little family?” And wound up with “did you get enough to eat, my little fatties?”
We STILL laugh about that, 20+ years on 😂
i'm wheezing omg😭😭😭
What if she said this on purpose 👀
Plot twist there was no mistake
Awwww your mumma sounds sweet :3
I do this to my siblings all the time lol
My friend once said "I'm gonna go take a dump" and "I have to use your bathroom" at the same time
And ended up saying "I'm gonna take your bathroom"
It's still an inside joke between us 'til this day
It's like cats marking territory.
I can imagine! 😂🤣
LMAOOOOO
Better than "I have to use your dump", I guess.
HES GONNA TAKE HIS BATHROOM
I once tried to say, “My brain is melting” and “My mind is breaking down” so I ended up with, and I quote,
“My main is having a brelt down”
Well, that sure shows that you're mind broke down
Your
It just helps send the message
Congrats for being added in a video my guy
@@mxron1. Wait what?
My mom tried to call over my sisters, ava and grace at the same time but ended up shouting "GRAVY"
Noelle Honey Sweetie Darling Gravy
@@gamingcookiereal 01100100 01100101 01101100 01110100 01100001 01110010 01110101 01101110 01100101 00100000 01110010 01100101 01100110 01100101 01110010 01100101 01101110 01100011 01100101 00100000 01101100 01101111 01101100 (convert from binary to text)
@gamingcookiereal was that a deltarune reference?
FUCK YEAH IM NOT THE ONLY NERD IN THE COMMENTS
Honestly, I feel like that should just be their code name.
It's much shorter, so if she needs to call both of them at the same time, she can say
"G R A V Y"
instead of the much longer
"A V A A N D G R A C E"
did they respond
I was listening to my friends tell a story. I tried to reply with "thats crazy!" or "thats insane!", but ended up yelling, "THATS A CRANE" at them, and they all stared at me in confusion for a few seconds 😭
plot twist: it was a steamroller
*IT'S A BIRD*
@@curiouscreator8806 It's a crane!
@@noodlesnookROADA ROLLA DA!!!
"Yeah so like, this happened-"
"THATS A CRANE"🔥🔥🔥
These ones are my all-time favorites honestly. First thing in a while to make me genuinely laugh out loud
same of all the matt rose videos these are the ones that make me laugh the most
Same. That's why I asked Reddit :D
Yoooo I done did get a heart from Matt! Thanks Matt, love your work. Your videos always cheer me up
@@the_zestylime oh wait was that you??
Edit: holy shit if that’s real then great job
I know, my stomach hurts from laughing now!
One time a friend of mine tried to make an excuse while on call not to go to a party with me and accidentally tried to say "I left my grandma outside" and "I forgot to turn off my stove" and said in a hurry "I left my grandma turned on" and hung up, later texted back, profusely apologizing.
🤣💀💀
LMAO I CAN'T RBEATHE
HELP LMAO
😂😂😂
@@TheQuietMaestro I am ACTUALLY rolling on the floor laughing 😂😂
So, one day I was in the band room at school, and like 3 people were talking to me at once.
I tried to say "hang on" and "shush yourself" at the same time.
I ended up saying "hang yourse-" and then I stopped, even though probably no one heard me.
HELP I WOULD CRY
@Not RickRoll 🅥 seven?
HELP THIS JUST MADE ME CACKLE
@@onlyjpg it’s a bot
HEHEHAHE
one time i tried to say
"you're very welcome"
and
"my pleasure"
to a customer i helped find the bread isle
_i said "you're very pleasured" to a poor elderly woman_
NO 😭
OH NO 😭😭
laugh
LMAO-
Be careful when I’m around.
I’m also a worker there 💀
NNOOO1!! 😭😭😭
Recently I was at work and it was pretty quiet so a female customer and I had a chat for a good 30 minutes. Being socially awkward, I had already planned to end with "It was nice to chat with you (too if nessacary)" pretty much once the conversation started. However, she threw a spanner in the works when she said "It was lovely to meet you" and my response was "I love you too"
oh holy shit thats probably the worst one
Amen to you brother 😭
*nesacurry
I would probably walk into on coming traffic if that happened to me
necassury*
I remember being at the store and wanting to ask my mom to buy some popcorn. For whatever reason I thought it'd be funny to randomly scramble the letters, and without thinking about it I shouted:"MUM CAN WE GET SOME COCPORN"
ua-cam.com/video/dLdvuTMhYRQ/v-deo.html
So, you have chosen death.
Who are you talking to?
Cerwfreverg🎉yuhhnneybtghyuvr rctyvtg😢trvv
@@Vanta526Who is it you think you see?
One time I was trying to ask my boyfriend "do you need to use the bathroom" and last second my brain decided to ask him if he had to pee instead so i ended up asking him "do you need to use the pee?". Died over that one for a while there.
reminds me of the tumblr post about someone asking 'do you need to use the sleep?'
@Iris Huisman yea! I was wondering why that sounded familiar lol
@@irishuisman1450 OH yeah it does sound like that post lmao. It's a quality post.
DO. YOU. NEED. TO. USE. THE. PEE. I CANT-
LMAO
One time I came to class late and tried saying "My bad mister, I slept in", but I was listening to music on my way there and still had my earbuds in. So instead of saying that, the lyrics I was humming mixed into what I was trying to say and I ended up blurting out "My baddie mister" in front of everyone. Not a single person in that class has allowed me to forget about it (we're all good friends and have a groupchat)
Is baddie a slang word for something funny, or was it…just funny?
I read what you meant to say and thought you ended up saying "I slept in my bad sister".
@Aaron Rayner
Okay, but the lack of punctuation in the quoted section of your comment scares me a little 😂.
@@Leonagraphy Baddie generally is slang for an attractive person.
@@shannonhughes203 Hol' up
My high school algebra teacher, while talking to a group of guys about their upcoming soccer game, tried to say "Kick 'em in the shins!" but realized that sounded too mean and switched halfway through to "Kick those balls!" Yeah, he just ended up telling them enthusiastically to "kick them in the balls!"
That’s even worse…
no he just doubled down on the mean and used that as an alibi in case they didn't like it
😹😹😹😹😹😹😹😹😹😹😹😹😹😹😹😹😹 I’m dead.
that doesnt make it better 😭😭
if you insist
I was helping my mom with dinner and I wanted to ask if we were gonna need spoons or forks. Instead it came out as “Do we need sporks or-” stopped myself, we both laughed about it, then I tried to ask again and said “Foons”. Her laughter was soul-healing.
LMFAO 🤣
At least the first one is already in common use lol
Once I was trying to say something about cults and countries to my dad and I managed to mix up the two words and very loudly, whilst staring directly into his eyes, said "C*NT" and then became so embarrassed that I couldn't say anything for 5 minutes. Thankfully we are British so it's slightly less bad than if we were American because apparently it's more insulting over there
If you were in Australia it would just signal a new maturing of your relationship 😀
CUNT?!
💀 WHAT. LMAO
@@dontbefatuousjeffrey2494 hell no-
It would be way different in Canada.
We’d beat the shit out of spoke who calls others “Cunts”
tbh as a brit, c*nt is part of my daily vocabulary at this point. Either my relationship has godly humour or im a social cretin that has lost the ability to socialise normally. I dread the day i accidentally say something in public that i forgot is actually offensive.
I'm American and I've never actually heard someone say cunt. I've heard it's a sexist thing for men to call women, but I often say it when I'm frustrated.
I don’t know why but these videos specifically make me laugh so hard, I thought people were exaggerating when they comment “I can’t breathe” on a video
It's a wonderful experience
I watched a video of someone reacting to the "pregananant" video once, and he was laughing so much that it made it 100 times funnier to me. It actually made me fall off the sofa I was sleeping on at the time, and I was crying and choking so hard that I ended up in coughing fits until I almost threw up from gagging so much. And that was even though I kept pausing the video to take breaks! I never knew laughing like that was possible. It's dangerous xD
I ended up laughing like this at one of the edits I made in one of my own videos, to the point that I became genuinely concerned about my inability to breathe and the violent coughing that followed once I could breathe again.
I was on a Skype call with my ex-girlfriend at the time, who didn't know I was watching back the video, because I was initially watching her draw over the call. She fell out of her chair laughing at *_my_* laugh, and was still laughing a bit when she got back to her desk to ask what was wrong with her drawing.
Sometimes I have to pause the video for a few moments so I can catch my breath.
Because of that, it is not a good idea to eat or drink while watching his videos.
One of my neighbors came around and asked to borrow an egg for a recipe, and as he was leaving I tried to say “have a great day” but I was still thinking about the egg and I realized “have a great egg” was halfway out my mouth, so I tried to save it, and just sputtered “have a gay egged!” Still scared to look him in the eye to this day
did he have a great egg though
was the gay egg
I'm the gay egg
your the gay egg
Was the egg gay 🤔
Was outside with my mum, tried to say, "I'm scared of a bird pooping on me" but my brain mushed 'Bird' and 'poop' and what I said was "I'm scared of a boob"
Th
OML-
relatable
me fr
Just one boob?
I work as a cashier and when people buy rotisserie chicken from the deli I usually ask “you want the chicken in a bag?” or “is a bag alright?”
I mashed them together one time and said “chicken bag YEAH!”
Reminds me of one time when my friend who apparently works at a KFC place.
She was going to say “here’s a bag with chicken”
Instead LOUDLY proclaimed
“HAVE A CHICKEN DAY”
CHICKEN BAG YEAH
That kind of sounds like an odd but good rap line
YEAHYEAHYEAHYEAHYEAHYEAHYEAHYEAHYEAHYEAHYEAH!
@@Theonly_z_Official I would LOVE to have a chicken day 😂😭
My friend's mum asked me what fast food place I would prefer. I tried to say "I don't care" and "It doesn't matter" at the same time. Accidentally told her that "I don't matter"
*mood*
real
Freudian slip XDD
oof
It means the same thing in the context
i think this is genuinely my favourite subject for a video, ever. full stop. i was in tears halfway through the video and wheezing when it was done. jesus christ.
My friend and I were playing a game a few minutes ago where he pretended to be a giant monster. He was trying to say "destroying" and "attacking" at the same time and he ended up saying "I'm a giant monster, and I'm distracting the city!"
Once I went to the doctors for being sick, and being the mess I was, I tried debating whether or not to be casual and say "whats up" or "Good morning, its great to see you (????)". For some reason they mixed up and so I looked my doctor into the eyes and said with a weak and raspy voice,
"What _is_ soup?"
This is the third soup jumble
@@realPurpleOrb EXACTLY
Cereal. Fight me
This implies that the ocean is cereal, therefore you should be fought
@@llllllllemon Is it though?
A colleague of mine once tried to say bye to an English customer, but she accidentally mixed it up with the Dutch word for bye which is 'doei'. She just looked the guy dead in the eyes and said:
"D... DIE."
oh I hope that never happens to me ^^'
"Thank you for shopping with us, now DIE 😊"
@@irishuisman1450 I told about what happened to another colleague of mine. Within 3 days she said the same thing to a foreign customer. Either our workplace in Eindhoven is cursed, or just telling about what happened is a curse in and of itself. If it's the latter.. I'm sorry
Did he come back shitless?
@@bigtrollybigtrolly I think being bilingual is a curse lmaoo. I'm also Dutch and worked in England for a while. Nah, the random dumb af sentences that left my mouth sometimes... I'm sure other bilinguals have the same issue XD
I sneezed in class and tried to say “I thought I could save it” but instead said “I was saving it for later… which was right after.”
I jumbled an entire sentence yesterday. I was trying to very enthusiastically make a point to my friend about something and all the words came out at once leaving me with “wereg in the waf ga by da ba!” shouted very directly into his face with the intensity of a heated lawyer in a court room. I just kept smiling like what I had said made perfect sense. He blinked and hit me with “you’re right, I can’t speak simlish.”
NOT THE SIMLISH!!😂😂
Bro not the Simlish
I'm dead 💀
I can actually hear the weird Sims guys speaking those exact words
I was scrolling through the comments, at 1 am and I go into a laughing fit for a whole minute because of this 😭💀
Are you having a stroke, my dude?
@@0_dearghealach_083 nah i just talk to fast for my own good lol
You know hes a good ytber when he managed to make a reddit video when every SR is shutting down for a few days
Reddits done gone dark boi
@Not RickRoll 🅥 bot
@F𝗮ѵ⊕ Edits SubReddit i assume
RIP reddit. Let's hope the protests work.
How does he do this
Was once helping a girl in my class with some math work. Now i have no idea what words she mixed up but i do know it ended with her looking at me dead in the eyes and going "you're a smart chicken arent ya"
I will never forget the weirdest complement ive ever been given in my life
I think it might’ve been “You’re a smart cookie” and “You’re a smart person” but idk
why did i read that in a northern irish accent?
Maybe she was Spanish and meant to say "chico" which means "boy"
This isn't even weird to me, "chicken" is a term of endearment where I'm from. So is "hen" and, best of all, "cock". We just really like poultry I guess.
@@TheKosstImogenyou’re a decent cock, mate
I tried too tell my Mom that that dog shit on the floor once and ended up saying "MY FLOOR SHITTED THE DOG"
I CAN'T BRATHE SSKOSMSVS
What happens after
@@dravengarcia8658 We both laughed and then cleaned up the poop lol
I am glad Matt is doing a part 2 series
He’s the guy who can make shrek 2 as good as 1
@Not RickRoll 🅥 wtf?
Hey, Shrek 2 was pretty good.
@@HiddenPufferfish01928 its a bot
what are you talking about shrek 2 was amazing
@@no_ I know
That’s what I ment
I’ll never forget the day i was talking to a female friend and got torn between saying either ‘swag’ or ‘slay’ so i just said ‘slag’
My favorite Transformer
It's the stuff you skim off the top of molten metal
I went to wave goodbye to a dear friend recently, but was tired and distracted and flipped him off instead. I'm normally really lovely to him.
He greeted me the next time I saw him by doing the same. We're good.
I read your comment out loud and accidentally said "sway".
@@gav1233 lol
Remembering the time I tried to say "pretend" and "practice" at the same time and ended up saying "pretactice" instead. It's not even that funny but TO THIS DAY every time it crosses my mind, my brain conjures up this image of a little cactus under the desert sun to accompany the word and it sends me into absolute hysterics.
now i’m picturing it 😭
That's adorable
You are now forced to look at the beautiful image again
pretactice
“Have a gay Davey!” should be actual slang for wishing some a good day
TRUE
I wonder if a person named Davey is Gay.
Tbh it sound like one of them old London sayings like
‘Apples and pears’
Or smt
@@RainyFoxQuadrobistTherianit’s called cockney rhyming slang
@@blucheavy3282 oh thx ☺️
I went with my parents to meet some extended family at a restaurant for my 12(-ish) birthday. I was excitedly explaining to my parents how badly I wanted a “big stitch” plushie for my birthday. Instead of saying “big stitch”, I said “I want a b*tch plushie!!” My parents (and I, at the time) were pretty intensely religious, so I froze and my face went red. Luckily they thought it was a really silly mistake and we all laughed, but I thought I committed like the most atrocious sin on the planet lol.
at least they laughed...
whyth, doesnt this word literar mean 'female dog'?
@@埊 They combined "big" and "stitch" into "bitch". Also, what does whyth mean?
@@el-nathanbut "bitch" means female dog
but did you get the b*tch plushie?
One time me and my friend were baking muffins in the kitchen. We left to do something for a little while but her mom was doing things in the kitchen so I poked my head in and was deciding between asking "Are the muffins ready" and "Have the muffins baked yet?". I totally blanked and screamed at this poor woman "BROMPHIN?!"
You sure you weren't *baked*?
Did she answer the question? The only way to respond to that is MAKLUCK
I can't breathe I'm dying help 😭
"Alright I fini-"
" *BROMPHIN* "
That sounds like some sort of food
One of my friends came out as bisexual, so I tried to tell her “that’s great!”, but my mouth wanted to say “okay.”
I accidentally said “That’s gay!”
Lmao. It would be so intrusive and intriguing
To say “That’s gay” to a LGBTQ person who isn’t even gay.
Random explanation:
One time someone randomly proclaimed “that’s gay” to me while me & my brother were just hugging after not meeting for years.
IT WAS AWKWARD.
THEY EVEN MISTAKEN ME AS A GUY-
i’m A FEMALE NOT A GUY
"I'm bi..."
"That's gay."
Well too bad your friend is only halfway gay
Well, it's not *wrong*
"Yeah. Gay." -Crimson
A customer asked me for a refill of water for his tea and I noticed it was my favourite tea he had in his cup. I planned on saying to him “you picked the best one” (in reference to the tea) and I just said “you pissed” with a blank stare. My face immediately turned beet red as I tried to explain myself and he and my coworkers laughed at me.
One time I was tired and I tried to say "It's doesn't matter" and "I don't mind" at the same time, I ended up creepily saying "It doesn't mind" to my grandma.
Tried to say “he has the longest time so far!” And “he’s lasted the longest” at the same time while at a bull ride machine at a school party. Instead, my dumbass shouted “HE’S LONGEST THE LASTEST!” And I still facepalm at myself from it 💀
Can I borrow this? It's amazing.
@@dakotahrickard go for it dude, at least you can do that on purpose 😭
old english be like
this is genuinely making me laugh way too hard at 8pm
but i literally talk like this with my friends
Mixed “put your hands in the air” and “get on the ground” as a police officer in improv, ended up yelling “put your hands on the ground!”
Reminds me of one time when I was going to say that I just blurted out
“CONTINUE KILLING”
I WAS ONLY 17!
One time when I was in art club after school, a class mate tried to say that’s nice and that’s lovely but ended up telling me “That’s lice”.
CONGRATS UR IN A VID
My friend working as wait staff was thinking how she wished one of the tables would be quiet, whilst putting a very hot plate on another table and said seriously "It's very hot, so be quiet." then immediately walked away 😂
Best I've got is mixing up "no problem " and "you're welcome" so telling a customer on the phone "your problem." before promptly hanging up.
"It's very hot, so be quiet." sounds so ominous 😂
@@lemondragon2341 "If you make a sound, you WILL be hideously burnt." 😂
no welcome
Had a friend who was a singer for a local rock band. When he gave me tickets for his show I was between saying “ sing your heart out” and “sing your voice out”. Ended up accidentally saying “sing your horse” 🐴
I thought you said
“When he gave me his *COCKS* for his show”
I BURSTED OUT LAUGHING
Impressive when most of Reddit is angery at Reddit so much that they stopped redditing on reddit
I guess reddit mods will have to go outside and breath in some fresh air
I was trying to say “Love you, bye!” To one of my friends and ended up saying, very cheerfully, “Lie!”
One time my biology teacher, while describing how a cell worked, tried to say ‘little holes’ and ‘pores’ at the same time. It came out ‘little whores.’ He had a good laugh about it alongside us.
this one is my favourite
He isn't wrong!
My mom tried to make a joke about this and instead said “whores and pores” 😂
I once had a roommate who worked at McDonald’s and she had to say “welcome to McDonald’s, are you going to be using the mobile app today?”
Now something about her is that (outside of work) she liked to jokingly bug people with a Mickey Mouse impression to the point where that shit grew lore.
So one morning she accidentally said “Welcome to mobile app, are you going to be using your McDonald’s today?” In a Mickey Mouse voice to some random stranger
I literally started laughing loudly in my living room imagining this
😂😂😂😂😂 that’s hilarious 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
I am using IHOP.
She probably either made that strangers day or made them confused for the rest of their lives
When I was 7 year old I was with my mum in the store and I bumped into a tall person I was trying to say “oops” and “sorry” and ended up saying sup
The look of pure happiness on the guys face still confuses me
One time when I was 14 (5 years ago)
I managed to say “Sorry” and “Excuse me” and “I DIDNT WATCH MY STEP”
i then *LOUDLY* proclaimed:
EXCUSE MY SISTER
he probably just thought it was cute.
@@Theonly_z_Officialomg 😭😭
@@Theonly_z_Officialyou have a lot of these stories, eh?
I mixed up some words recently: baking instructions and baking directions.
The result? Baking DESTRUCTIONS
I'd like to think I'm better at baking than that implies.
I recently had an appointment at my doctors. I tend to pick up on other peoples accents halfway through a conversation with them without me noticing. When the appointment was finished, I tried to say ‘thank you’, but was anticipating a ‘you’re welcome’ and ended up yelling in my poor doctors face
“YOU’RE welcome” in a vaguely Eastern European accent.
Then I just walked out.
💀
I was once cycling home with a watermelon in a bag hanging off my handlebars and it was pulling me around. Some people moved to the side to let me pass on a thin pathway. What I wanted to say was something along the lines of "Oh thanks, but I can't cycle very straight right now because of this watermelon and I don't want to knock into you". What came out was "Oh no thanks, I have a melon"
I played trombone all through middle school, and once a kid poked his head into the aisle on the bus and I hit him with my case. I tried to say "are you ok" and "sorry" and ended up very aggressively telling him "are you sorry!" Never living it down
Now that reminds me of one time when I was gonna order..
when I was gonna ask for a
“Caramel Macchiato”
My brain thought of something completely else
I ended up saying:
Can I have a mosquito please?
💀
And then 4 mins later bumbing into my friend and I tried to say
“OPSIE DAISY” and “FUCK ME NOT AGAIN” at the same time.
I loudly proclaimed publicly. “OH FUCK ME DAISY” 😭
HIS NAME IS ARON.
i don't know why but this one absolutely destroyed me😂
WELL THANK GOD HE WASN'T CALLED DAISY💀💀💀💀💀💀💀😂
@@anushascott1512 LOL
@@Theonly_z_OfficialOH FUCK ME DAISY in the most Mario accent possible is hilarious
One time, I tried to say "I'm in Spain without the P" (like "I'm insane") but I somehow ended up with "I'm insane without the D" well that one got passed around the group chat in no time at all 💀
You should make a video solely from UA-cam comments (if you haven't already. I'm methodically watching through all of them now, I've only just discovered your channel but it's hilarious and I love your content)
I’m in Spain without the A
@@depressionpie4859 S P I N
@@depressionpie4859 youyr'e in spin?
I was once talking to my brothers at a wedding or something that we were all at and I was trying to say "let's take a seat" and "let's sit" and i totally told them "let's take a shit" and no one in our family swears and I just looked at them and we all burst out laughing and I was like "let's not talk about that again" 😂
Now that reminds me of one time when I was gonna order..
when I was gonna ask for a
“Caramel Macchiato”
My brain thought of something completely else
I ended up saying:
Can I have a mosquito please?
💀
And then 4 mins later bumbing into my friend and I tried to say
“OPSIE DAISY” and “FUCK ME NOT AGAIN” at the same time.
I loudly proclaimed publicly. “OH FUCK ME DAISY” 😭
HIS NAME IS ARON.
LMFAO 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
@@Theonly_z_Official🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Swede visiting Ireland, eating lunch. Needed to use the bathroom so got the attention of a waitress to ask where the restroom was. My handful of braincells got spooked just as I opened my mouth and out came "can I borrow your toilet?"
If it’s any comfort, that’s actually a pretty common idiom in American English. Might be a Western US thing.
@@theKobus That is a comfort, thank you :-)
I rarely laugh out loud at UA-cam videos, but your videos make me genuinely laugh an embarrassing amount. I was on the couch while my brother was watching a very sad scene in Breaking Bad and I just started cracking up, I had to move to my room to finish the video.
What was the scene, if I may ask?
@@skin_lizard The one where Walter says "Time to break bad" and breaks all the bad everywhere
@@Scribblemations REAL!!!!!
@@skin_lizard “The opening scene of S3E11 (but it could be 10 or 12.)”
- my brother when I asked him
@@hondaaccord736 it was probably not 10
Accidentally stepped on my friends foot, tried to say “sorry“ and “oops” at the same time… looked her dead in the eyes and said “soup.”
My sister used to work at Giant Tiger years ago and one night while making the usual “we’re closing in fifteen minutes” speech (which was supposed to begin with “good evening Giant Tiger shoppers”) she said “Good evening Giant tigers”, panicked and then slammed the phone so hard down on the receiver the sound went through the whole store. The cherry on top was this whole thing happened just as I was coming into the store to pick her up so I heard every embarrassed word of it 😂
How did the customers react?
@@Blazdragon34 you know what? I honestly don’t remember because I was busy dying of laughter 😂 I don’t think there were many in the store tho because it was so close to closing time. I’ll have to ask her and see if she remembers 😅
I guarantee nobody would realize if she hadn't panicked
@@Blazdragon34 I did end up asking her and she said there were a couple that got second hand embarrassment from her because they were near enough to actually see her do it all 😂 she also said it wasn’t the first time she ... shall we say “misused” the PA system there either 😂🤦♀️
I would be so confused as a customer there wondering why an employee had used the intercom to just say “good evening giant tigers” and nothing else…followed by an ominous slam💀
One time I was in class talking about our math textbook that I really didn't like. I had several problems that I had gotten wrong simply because of the wording, and I was talking about this to my class. I tried to say, "this textbook is really badly worded." Instead, what I ended up saying was, "this textbook is really wordly badded." in front of my whole class.
I couldn't stop laughing for the next five minutes.
What did the class say? Lol!
@@Blazdragon34 They just laughed XD
Lol the irony is perfect
@@laughsingay lol!!!
You were just demonstrating your point through an object lesson. How forward thinking!
I asked my dad for a drink of his water cup since I didn’t have one. I have no FLIPPIN clue what I was trynna say, but I said,” Moshie” while making eye contact. I was also smiling hunched over after waking up from a 3 hour nap. This happened months ago and I’m still confused. 🤷♀️
Your brain hadn't woken up yet
@@shotosynthesis312 yeah haha
Sorry but from the story I cant imagine you as anything but a baby
> approach dad
> "Moshie :}"
> stare intensely
@@dj-murlock y e s
I was trying to say “person” but somehow started saying character and stopped halfway through and ended up saying “sometimes I feel like the only carrot”
I have two of these stories.
So, I was on call with a few friends and we're playing a horror game. Its pretty late at night, I just drank a Caprisun and an energy drink. My friend laughs at something another said and her giggle sounded very menacing. I went to say giggle and chuckle, but ending up telling her she has a "devious chickle" 💀
The second one happened between me and my mother. Whenever I grab something, I usually say "snatch" or "yoink". Tried to say both and ended up shouting "SNOINK"
My mother now uses it in her daily speech.
SNOINK😂😂
While reading this i said aloud "Energy brink"
@@gargolgaming8101 LMAO
@@EstelleLuminas it is a recurring joke. every time i think its over, oh no. it comes back.
Chickle sounds like a slur and that somehow makes it a bit funnier
This reminds of one tongue twister “I slit the sheet, the sheet I slit. Upon the slitted sheet I sit.” I think the problem speaks for itself especially when you’re doing this as a vocal warm-up for a musical with a youth theatre company.
If you'd had the word "Christian" in front of "youth" there I would've been howling
"I slit the sheet
the sheet I slit
Upon the slitted sheet I sit"
"I slit the sheet the sheet I slit upon the slitted sheet I sit
"I slit the sheet the sleet I shi
shitted sleet i shit.
I am a mother pleasant plucker
I pluck mother pheasants
I am the most pleasant mother pheasant plucker
To pluck mother pheasants
That's on them, giving you that tongue twister. They KNEW what they were doing.
Matt, I know you don’t like to do too many of the same type of video but I think I speak for everyone when I say that I am BEGGING you to do more of these. They are side-splitting. ❤❤❤
he hearted the comment, it may be possible 👺💀
the "FLONG!" thing had me laughing so hard it triggered a coughing fit and I'm now not entirely sure I haven't collapsed a lung
Throwback to when I wanted to say: "Oh I love succulent plants!" And "I own a lot of succulents!" It came out "Oh I own a love pants." A LOVE PANTS.
“I own a love pants.” Beautiful….absolutely beautiful.
@@FancyCat-jw2qz thank you☺️
@@Jay_fromtoa ofc! I aspire to be this absolutely genius that when I mash words a create a whole entire new phrase.
@@FancyCat-jw2qz please, you flatter me😭
A LOVE PANTS 😭 man I wish my weird combined sentences were HALF as good as that XD
Once tried to say “Matt” and “rose” at the same time and said “voluptuous ass” (true story)
me
@@aaainainaina skullemoejee
FLONG
@@yellowmello1223 FLONG
Ratt mose
The other day my friend and I were having a discussion about the new Zelda game, and I somehow tried to say "Twitter" and "Link" at the same time, and I ended up saying "Twink," thus causing both of us to fall over in hysterics
I mean...he is a twink
tbf twink is a pretty good description of what Link looks like xD
He is tho
you aint wrong
link might be the most convenient possible character to accidentally call a twink
When my sister’s cat gets a hairball, he starts wheezing, and once I tried to THINK “are you okay” and I’m so glad I didn’t say anything, cuz if I did I would’ve just yelled “Happy Birthday!”
My friend once wanted to use 2 german slang words. "ne"=no and "digga"=bro, which would together mean something like "come on, really?". He ended up screaming the N word really loudly
what happened after that
OH NO 😭😭
Oh dear lord
N####!
*o h n o*
💀
Once I tried to wish farewell to my joyfriends with an "I love you." Brain tried to end it with a "babes" and "boos" at the same time so I said "I love you, boobs."
Rip
bro no💀
Bro became Kazuma in real life
At Least You Didn’t Say “I Love You, BAAAAAAAAAAA!” [BAAAAAAAAAAA As In Like A Sheep Or Goat Going: Baaaa!]
what's a joyfriend?
Yesss, I've been waiting for this one. Part 1 almost made me pee myself. I tried to show it to my mom and after 20 seconds she was legit like "This is actually too funny for me to watch. I'm going to hurt myself laughing" and then she left.
I worked at Chick-fil-A for a while, and when it got really late at night, I would lose all ability to function or form sentences. There was one time I was working the drive-thru later in the evening when I tried to say "have a nice day" and "have a nice night," so instead I said "Have a nice DIE" followed by me staring them blankly in the eyes as they drove away, having no idea how to apologize.
Can you IMAGINE going to MacDonald's and getting greeted with "HEIL" .
Far too easily. Corporate culture be like that 😕
Imagine the McDonald's worker returning the "HEIL!"
I think i’d die
Probably happened in Germany once.
ReichDonald's.
My friend was talking about how a bunch of old games are being remade and he meant to say “I bet the people who used to play those are having their minds blown” but instead he said “I bet the people who used to play those are blowing their brains out.”
😂😂😂 LMAO
God no
The duality of remakes
This series is what got me on this channel in the first place, my stomach hurts from laughing so much XD
Worst one I ever did was when I worked in a pharmacy and my 2 main sentences working register besides greeting and closing, was "What's the last name/date of birth/spelling?" and "I need a mix!" (what we called suspended meds usually given to children; the pharmacist had to mix them but we had to scan them and bring them to the reconstitution station). Well I got a mix one day, was rather distracted because I had like 2 different orders going at once, and brought the mix over to the station and shouted across the pharmacy "WHAT'S THE DATE OF B-MIX?!" across the pharmacy. everyone turned and looked at me shouting confused, corrected myself, then burst out laughing, including the pharmacist giving me the mix
"Are they damaged or do you just don't wanted them?"
-me when a customer returned a carton of eggs
Once at my school I was talking to a friend and tried to say 'geez Louis!' And 'Jesus!' at the same time and I loudly said 'Jesus Louisus!' To the entire cafeteria. This phrase is now used commonly among my family when we are surprised.
why is this so funny to me
People should start using this
Imagine pulling up to the Dairy Queen drive-through and the person just says "You're watching Disney Channel."
And then you pull up to the window, and see the person also drawing the Mickey Mouse head with their finger and singing the 4-note motif while at it.
Funny I had an experience along the lines of this my friends and I joke about.
I was taking a hands on jewelry-making course as an elective two semesters ago in college. For the first or second to last project of the year I got to the building and started working at 10am, and time slowly ticked until it was about 10pm and I had awhile to go. After almost an entire day of working, a girl from a different jewelry course came to work on their project. We eventually sparked up conversation after awhile of working in silence, and it lead to me asking her about her major. She responded with aerospace, and because I noticed her shirt that read "women in aerospace" earlier I had planned on saying that I saw you shirt. Somehow in my exhausted dialogue I mixed up "I saw your shirt" and something else (probably incoherent, I honestly can't remember) to form the amazing response: "Oh yeah, I saw you shart".
She looked at me, obviously confused, but I tried my best to play it off as if nothing happened and she misheard. I faked noticing her confusion and "repeated" that I saw her shirt. After she left 30-ish minutes later I had to sat down on the floor and take a moment to think about how I accidentally told I girl I saw her shart. There's a reason my friends now sometimes call me the rizzler after that master play.
Insanely bold move
King rizz 🙇♂️
The rizz is beyond celestial
He started the rizz trend 💀
Are we not going to talk about the McDonald's cashier who just said "heil"
Time to bring back my one which wasn't even that bad, but still haunts me to this day.
One day at work, I was greeting someone as they walked in. I went to say "Good morning!", then realised I was unsure of the time and didn't know if it was still morning, so I changed it to simply "Hello!" Instead, however, I said a mix of the two and managed to cheerfully say "Gellowing! 😊"
I was walking with my friend to a cafe when she saw a fluffy dog, the owner very nicely allowed my friend to pet the dog. In her mind, there were two sentences. “She’s so fluffy!” and “She’s so chubby!” My friend ended up saying “She’s so plushie!”
Technically correct!
@@0_dearghealach_083 yes.
okay but that’s adorable
I have a terrible habit of mixing “that’s ok” and “you’re good” when I’m at work and I keep telling customers “that’s good” when they ask me if they can do certain things. Like a lady asked if she could get her sunglasses from her car. I said “that’s good”. 😀
i mean it works
It is indeed good to protect your eyes from the sun
I did 4:23 once. I was in Germany and since I'm learning German I try to use it every time I get a chance. So that one day I entered the bakery and tried to say "Hallo" but my brain was still in English mode so it started with "Hi". What got through my mouth was a loud "Heil-o".
I tried very hard to not facepalm myself and stuck to English to buy my bread.
The original was one of the first videos by you I watched, it’s neat to see a sequel
Edit: just had a cursed memory. My friend made a drawing of a horse and tried to say “horse” and “pony” at the same time. She said “H*RNY”
"P*RNY" could also have emerged. Also cursed.
What did you say in response?
@@EatAnOctorok Hopefully a dead stare with pure silence... :)
I DREW A HORNY
@@Lokear I was 7, (friend was 12) I had no idea why my mom (who was the art teacher) was laughing so hard
I remembered it recently and realized why it was so funny
Your hype attitude followed by immediately going to the next joke always makes me laugh so hard I sometimes forget to breathe, and I thank you (And the people that post these jokes) for that. I can always count on this community to brighten my day!
One time someone sneezed and I was gonna say “Bless you” or “Did you sneeze? Bless you!” and it came out as “Blessdid sneeze” 😂😂😂
1:42 "Have a gay Davey!"
Me, a Newsies fan: "Thanks, I believe I will."
me a dayshift at freddys fan: thank you very much
Me, a Dave and Bambi fan: Sorry, that Davey isn’t gay.
@@imabitsilly118hello old sport