“Men Gain Self-Esteem By Saying No To Women” | Sadia Khan

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  • Опубліковано 19 січ 2025

КОМЕНТАРІ • 2,9 тис.

  • @ChrisWillx
    @ChrisWillx  Рік тому +156

    Full episode here: ua-cam.com/video/8g0rMB6quiQ/v-deo.html

    • @Solistastyle
      @Solistastyle Рік тому

      Why do you speak to such intellectually challenged/emotionally unhealthy women?
      Jesse Inchauspe is Amazeballs, but this one thinks Andrew Tate is a high value man and spits ignorance like this. She's explaining a Kardashian mindset, not a Real Woman's mindset.
      You don't get high self esteem from losing weight or refusing sex , irrespective of your gender.
      You get high self esteem from pursuing a purpose, making authentic connections and living with integrity.
      And certainly if you are pumping your face with Botox at such a young age, you are reeking of mental health issues that are definitely going to escalate with age if you think in this direction. 🤦🏾‍♀️

    • @Portia620
      @Portia620 Рік тому +8

      A man with self control???? Like to see that one!

    • @bradfisher407
      @bradfisher407 Рік тому +2

      What channel is this?

    • @marycoronado2714
      @marycoronado2714 Рік тому +1

      TY,TY so...
      much for this insight very helpful!!!!!!

    • @JR-xs1yh
      @JR-xs1yh Рік тому +4

      @@Portia620 This advice applies to men & women. All around the world & in the media are so many examples of men & women with no self control.

  • @spinninginspace
    @spinninginspace Рік тому +4525

    "if you never say no, your yes means nothing"

  • @mooregabeplease
    @mooregabeplease Рік тому +3651

    This is the greatest explanation for why self-control in men is so important. Self-control breeds confidence. Incredible stuff

    • @Xzsxztreiii
      @Xzsxztreiii Рік тому +18

      Just stop it gabe😂😂😂 give it up

    • @liggmabawls5634
      @liggmabawls5634 Рік тому +13

      Yes self control does but not like she is saying

    • @467076
      @467076 Рік тому +12

      @@sfall616he probably watches that one red pilled dude who got schooled by the Catholic girl in that podcast because she questioned his self control 😂

    • @edheldude
      @edheldude Рік тому +36

      She's talking about "men" i.e. top 5% who have all the options because she wants them to commit to her instead of them exercising their options. She's just basically lying but just presenting this as life advice as if she knows what's best for these top level self-made men.

    • @BasedGym675
      @BasedGym675 Рік тому +18

      ​@@edheldude nailed it on the head. She's saying this for her own selfish benefit.

  • @jarerarebear1765
    @jarerarebear1765 Рік тому +440

    If you don't control your passions, your passions will control you. It is so crucial to not give into every impulse you have.

    • @monejohn9973
      @monejohn9973 Рік тому +8

      Exactly...Pride comes before the fall...

    • @mfgreviews5028
      @mfgreviews5028 Рік тому +4

      BS. Passions are not addictions. Follow your passion. That's what the greatest artist do.

    • @OverRule1
      @OverRule1 Рік тому +3

      ​@@mfgreviews5028 Follow your passion but don't be consumed by it. Always know the difference between doing what you love and what you love doing you

    • @MrT-nh6di
      @MrT-nh6di Рік тому

      1000%

    • @losmaldonado9655
      @losmaldonado9655 Рік тому +2

      @@mfgreviews5028you do know that all the greatest artists die way before they should… hmmm I wonder why?

  • @jflores85
    @jflores85 7 місяців тому +191

    "You control who you put yourself into" works on so many levels. Its true

    • @terrytran7127
      @terrytran7127 5 місяців тому +1

      You just made it work for you..!
      E.i: You’re put yourself into a car, & ends up controlling it..!
      She litterly flipped the narrative, women tends to be effected more then men by their emotions, she’s suggesting that men are more controlled by their emotions then men, that’s crazy..!🤦🏽

    • @PosiVibes_Hub
      @PosiVibes_Hub Місяць тому

      😂 who you put yourself into. True 😂😂😂

  • @joetruong6964
    @joetruong6964 Рік тому +816

    Staying loyal to one person is good for your spirit and soul.

    • @midnight347
      @midnight347 Рік тому +52

      Too bad most of us can't find anyone who will remain loyal to us. It's nearly impossible in this day and age at least with modern western women.

    • @Xboxlove1
      @Xboxlove1 Рік тому

      total cap lmao. Say 50% of women want to be promiscuous and 50% rather be loyal. The 50% that are promiscious you see everywhere, bars and clubs, nightmare dating stories and hookup stories, dating apps, all the exposure is on those types. The traditional couples find each other, stay loyal and move on from this cancer called dating and you never hear about them again lmao@@midnight347

    • @joseluiz7017
      @joseluiz7017 Рік тому

      @@midnight347100% unfortunately

    • @catesj15
      @catesj15 Рік тому +23

      @@midnight347I had to leave my last pattern. Everything was perfect, but he was a playboy. So handsome girls throw themselves at him, and he couldn’t say no. I had to detox from him. Seems like everyone cheats

    • @anthonyharmon9265
      @anthonyharmon9265 Рік тому +1

      Tell that to women...99% are adulterers.

  • @Bakerygo
    @Bakerygo Рік тому +1855

    I think self control is good for anyone regardless of gender.

    • @LonjeMarie7
      @LonjeMarie7 Рік тому +71

      I agree I am a woman and for me it’s definitely both

    • @Moonie787
      @Moonie787 Рік тому +15

      Absolutely

    • @mica4977
      @mica4977 Рік тому

      Indeed. The latest generations are on a self-indulgence spree. Whether it's gluttony towards social media, food, sexual pleasure & so on. Some self control would do well for both sides during this sexual revolution

    • @Boatofnoah1
      @Boatofnoah1 Рік тому +3

      You have a point🩵

    • @Ari_diwan
      @Ari_diwan Рік тому +1

      Totally

  • @K3r0411
    @K3r0411 Рік тому +1383

    We all need both, authenticity, and self-control.

    • @anabltc
      @anabltc Рік тому +24

      ​@@asparrow9876I had the similar feeling. She intermittently spits 💯 truth but then says something dubious (atl for me). I liked some of her takes tho.
      Also, she's quite gorgeous which kinda distracts me (and I'm a straight f so I can imagine how a man must feel)
      Then I notice that her face barely moves and I think it might be botox which distracts me even more 😂

    • @Wicha329
      @Wicha329 Рік тому +17

      @@anabltc You simply don’t like what she has to say. It’s crazy how often youtube commenters feel like they have some sort of authority when it comes to science, biology, psychology, etc. You people in the youtube comment section are the ones who don’t know what you’re talking about. Utterly ridiculous to speak with such confidence, calling someone out when you have no support for your claim aside from, “Her face looks weird, maybe she had botox.” Please, stop commenting like you’re so educated for the love of God.

    • @anabltc
      @anabltc Рік тому +4

      @@Wicha329 wym, I wrote that I like some of her takes and she's quite gorgeous. And yes, some takes I don't like and her face really doesn't move. I have not talked from an educated position at all

    • @djohnsveress6616
      @djohnsveress6616 Рік тому

      @@Wicha329 ...And what is YOUR problem ? Nobody claimed to be a professional. How the hell did that even come up to you..
      Pointing out something painfully general doesn't make you stand out of the rest because there are thousands like you in every comment section thinking they have a higher elevated point of view. Like.. What is wrong with people commenting about her botox ? I have two eyes, i can tell, i don't need masters degree on all sciences 😂to observe you monkey.

    • @coolbreeze5683
      @coolbreeze5683 Рік тому +13

      I agree... I'm a woman and I feel that both are important for both men and women. She can't really say that women should be able to follow what they crave because they're being authentic to themselves but men need to hold back because they need to have self-control.
      Both sexes are capable of having a balance in their lives.

  • @madihaq2252
    @madihaq2252 Рік тому +416

    There is something extremely attractive about a disciplined man. It shows in the way he carries himself. How he conducts himself. It draws attention when he doesn't do anything to seek attention.

    • @hughjanus2781
      @hughjanus2781 Рік тому +8

      That’s false

    • @jayayy655
      @jayayy655 Рік тому +47

      @@hughjanus2781it’s very true. Especially when it’s real, it’s the people who have none themselves that are drawn to it because they want to know the secret to that self control and discipline themselves. It’s an aura, and it’s rare.

    • @Portia620
      @Portia620 Рік тому +6

      @@hughjanus2781good luck if your a guy.

    • @Portia620
      @Portia620 Рік тому

      @@jayayy655I have that! Wow! It’s not helping me as a woman! I need sex! 😂😂. Many many years!

    • @JMEdaRollerblader
      @JMEdaRollerblader Рік тому +8

      It does show attractiveness your right but a woman still won't say anything to us directly. Its a double standard in my opinion

  • @thomasbuxton2648
    @thomasbuxton2648 6 місяців тому +47

    “You actually gain far more self control when you reject women”
    As someone who’s 31 years of age and been rejected by every woman I’ve respectfully approached, I don’t think she realises there are men who’ve never had the opportunity to “reject” women.
    And I am sick and tired of being told I need to become an ungodly perfect version of myself and women would flock to me. I have a job, I keep myself healthy, I go gym regularly, I’m loyal and dedicated to my family, what more in Gods name am I meant to do to become worthy of love? There are men who have only half of what I have yet they are happily married.

    • @YT.epicgamer
      @YT.epicgamer 5 місяців тому +6

      keep fighting, never give up the grind

    • @HarmeetSinghBrarOfficial
      @HarmeetSinghBrarOfficial 5 місяців тому +4

      I would suggest to check the book '3 Percent Men" by Corey Wayne and read it periodically (really important), as we loose the lessons and focus after a while. May be that's the missing piece of puzzle in your story, good luck buddy!

    • @jayrocket196
      @jayrocket196 4 місяці тому +16

      I'm 33, I approached a total of around 15 women two years ago, all of them were married. Every time I asked for the number, they would tell me they were married, yet they still acted like they wanted me. I don't want to be "the other guy". They're not as "happily married" as you think, dude.
      So I stopped approaching, and after a while, women started approaching me and even flirting and breaking the ice. And guess what? And all of THEM were married too. Some will even look at me lustfully with their husbands standing RIGHT THERE.
      But I don't want them. I don't even try anymore, because it feels like everyone's married at this point, and I'm not stealing anybody's wife, no matter how easily I could. I'll wait as long as I need to until the right woman comes along.
      That's self-control. Women find it attractive because they can't have me so easily.
      Detachment is magnetic. I know it sounds crazy, but that's how it works.

    • @blue-phoenix115
      @blue-phoenix115 4 місяці тому +6

      Seriously? I'm a short guy and I attract a lot of women. I notice women giving me the signal to soft approach frequently in public whenever I dress nice and look sharp.
      I ignore them all. It feels great.

    • @enlightenlife2840
      @enlightenlife2840 3 місяці тому

      Why dont you take this guy out and give him some face to face help!​@@blue-phoenix115

  • @gregoryclark7566
    @gregoryclark7566 Рік тому +88

    She is so right. Self control is the result of self discipline. Self discipline comes from self respect and embracing morality. If you feel that you are staying within the boundaries of self imposed morality, self control is very achieveable in your life.

  • @kimmarquis2354
    @kimmarquis2354 Рік тому +605

    She is spot on. One thing she didn’t mention is that, Women know when a man has little to no self control. Just like Men know when a women is lacking self respect. The lack of self control and self respect shows plain as day. Need to respect yourself first, before anyone else will.

    • @balancer182
      @balancer182 Рік тому +13

      I believe in chastity for both men and women.
      But if what you say is true, pick-up artists would get no women and would go bankrupt.
      So she is wrong. Her advice should be more for women than men, because women are more likely to suffer lower self-esteem due to hookups.

    • @AloiseHandle
      @AloiseHandle Рік тому +16

      ​​​@@balancer182 If that were the case, then I wouldn't suffer from low self-esteem. I don't sleep around. Never had a significant other either. Granted, I will agree. Both the sexes benefit from the advice the lady is giving in this vid.

    • @balancer182
      @balancer182 Рік тому +19

      @@AloiseHandle 😯If you are a virgin, wow you are high value. There's only like 5-8% of you. Much respect, and you should have no problems finding a partner.
      For men, virginity or low body count is still a mark of shame, so if women like you actually prefer a chaste man, louder pls lol, so that men have a reason to save themselves and endure the societal pressure.

    • @smarmypapsmears634
      @smarmypapsmears634 Рік тому

      I disagree. Of course women want to minimize male sexuality aka having many women in order to secure that high value dude who could have many women. It's all about women minimizing men's mating strategy and maximizing their own.

    • @Ouranos369
      @Ouranos369 Рік тому +8

      I wouldn't say spot on... it's an oversimplification. Every human has both masculine and feminine traits to balance and the weak points vary by individual.

  • @joelharvey
    @joelharvey Рік тому +167

    Nail on the head. Self control is literally the key to success and prosperity. I wish I had more when I was younger.

  • @yamahapilot
    @yamahapilot Рік тому +161

    It's not specifically about rejecting women, but rather about exercising self-control as a man in public. There's no need to gaze at every woman or crave their reciprocation. It's about focusing on your own tasks and not allowing yourself to be swayed or distracted by the attention-seeking behavior of others, especially women.

    • @vrajaram
      @vrajaram Рік тому +9

      There’s a reason she’s mentioning women and food. Both are hard to avoid for most men. Hunger is the first element of self discipline.
      And apropos women, it’s not about rejecting, but say you had an option but you avoid, that’s self control. And it’s hard and sexy.

    • @coolbreeze5683
      @coolbreeze5683 Рік тому +31

      I agree. In the past, I've dated guys who had such wandering eyes in public that it was embarrassing. Just the lack of self-awareness was a big turn off and it would actually make me lose respect for them. Not having self-control carries over to so many other parts of life.
      I'm married to a guy who is very focused and intellectual now and I definitely find him way sexier than any guy I used to date. I think when a guy isn't spreading his attention thinly, he becomes more like a God than an animal in my eyes 😂

    • @vrajaram
      @vrajaram Рік тому +7

      @@coolbreeze5683 Lol, The animal analogy was humourous. I guess women are so used to preying eyes that when they see a man who is different, they tend to get impressed. Most men find it very difficult to even have a conversation with women, looking at their eyes whereas the reverse is almost a given.
      That said, men are extremely visual beings, it's almost an innate nature for them to look at women, particularly the beautiful ones. People have gone a bit tangential on this video though, commenting about rejecting women, etc. but missed her point on controlling hunger, working out and getting disciplined.

    • @coolbreeze5683
      @coolbreeze5683 Рік тому +20

      ​​​@@vrajaramt's the lack of self-awareness some men have that is off putting. I'm married and off the market but still get stares from men in public.
      I agree that men and women like looking at beauty but there's a difference when it's a person that is attractive vs. beautiful "objects".
      If you like looking at beauty, look at paintings, flowers or nature.
      Gawking at attractive people and not having enough empathy to realize the person you're looking at has humanity and maybe feels uncomfortable by your staring is something else.
      A person's body is just their shell. Not everyone wants to be stared at, approached by randoms or get unwanted attention based on a shell they happened to be born with.

    • @RR-et6zp
      @RR-et6zp Рік тому +2

      we wanna spread out seed

  • @fourninemarketing
    @fourninemarketing Рік тому +12

    Sadly, I think many women do the same and reject men out of not wanting to be messed around or getting in there before the man gets a chance to reject them. It’s a horrible process on both sides.

  • @kurosan0079
    @kurosan0079 Рік тому +16

    I think self-control and authenticity should apply both men and women.

    • @DaShogun999
      @DaShogun999 5 місяців тому

      Of course it does. But that’s not the point she’s making

    • @fun2222
      @fun2222 Місяць тому

      SHE DID

  • @1_Bad_Z
    @1_Bad_Z Рік тому +141

    Being grounded, displaying confident body language and having purpose in life is key.

    • @dmitry5319
      @dmitry5319 Рік тому +1

      yep, I think this is by far closer to the truth than just "self-control"

  • @FullCircleTravis
    @FullCircleTravis Рік тому +100

    I have rejected lots of women throughout my life. The reason why is because I don't let people use me to boost themselves. They're just taking energy from me and offering nothing back.

    • @johnnastrom9400
      @johnnastrom9400 Рік тому

      "I have rejected lots of women throughout my life" -- Yes, because you are so desirable, right? You sure have a big ego.

    • @adexridau26
      @adexridau26 Рік тому +8

      Exactly

    • @jagathwal9444
      @jagathwal9444 Рік тому

      Far more self esteem from rejecting women??? That's pure & utter bullshit. So she's saying if a stunning woman gives a man a sign, he'll reject her to boost his self-esteem. I like this woman. She means well. But she's not a he! Therefore there's no possible way she can know what she's talking about regarding the male psyche!

    • @jagathwal9444
      @jagathwal9444 Рік тому

      It's crazy how often you meet a women, & she can't help herself but drop hints wanting money! Sometimes they're just plain blatant! This nearly always happens before you have even been intimate with her! Either way it's the same old story. So hard to find a genuine woman in the modern world! When they're all bloodthirsty leeches looking for anything & everything they can possibly extract from a man! Gets boring after a bit!

    • @Patrick-e2u5e
      @Patrick-e2u5e Рік тому +5

      Way to go Travis! You can't lose when you say no to a woman who means you no good 😊

  • @silverpenn3809
    @silverpenn3809 Рік тому +77

    We all need self-control. I'm a skinny woman with a beer belly. I had to say no to all my favorite foods and stop eating candy, chocolate and drinking soda. Been doing intermittent fasting (14 hours) for two months now and the results are amazing. Skin is glowing and body is tight again. Next step is to change careers. Been wanting to for over a decade now.

    • @justone3243
      @justone3243 Рік тому +2

      Go carnivore

    • @diogobz5348
      @diogobz5348 Рік тому +2

      I’d recommend you to visit a nutritionist and join a gym as well. Your life will reach a whole next level in terms of health and self steam

    • @silverpenn3809
      @silverpenn3809 Рік тому +1

      @@diogobz5348 🙏

    • @pio7763
      @pio7763 Рік тому

      Still have this shitty job?

    • @dane1sro278
      @dane1sro278 Рік тому +5

      Congratulations on your self control. I won't lie I chuckled at the image of a skinny woman with a beer belly 😂

  • @keithempower
    @keithempower Рік тому +10

    I agree..Self Control and Authenticity is very important

    • @TG-nh6ni
      @TG-nh6ni Рік тому

      Kinda feel like both apply to all genders.

    • @TG-nh6ni
      @TG-nh6ni Рік тому

      Kinda feel like both apply to all genders.

  • @Goldmember333
    @Goldmember333 Рік тому +9

    Yep, facts! I've recently come out of a 9 year relationship, spent 7 months drinking etc and now I'm off the booze, training and rejecting weekend flings and I feel top of the world. Stay strong guys it doesn't actually take that much 🤙

    • @franciscolopez3224
      @franciscolopez3224 11 місяців тому

      When you learn to love yourself first....then you are able to love others.That is Key to success.

  • @tyronsimpson2143
    @tyronsimpson2143 Рік тому +59

    I realised this many years ago. It's about being your own boss. Not being led astray by things that do and will never benifit your soul.....

  • @danfg7215
    @danfg7215 Рік тому +327

    Now I just have to figure out how to reject all these women who don't even know I exist...

    • @edheldude
      @edheldude Рік тому +71

      Yeah. Well-fed person telling starving people not to crave food.

    • @justone3243
      @justone3243 Рік тому +34

      She had too much sausage and is now trying to get rid of the sauce they left

    • @ancientfuture9690
      @ancientfuture9690 Рік тому +9

      😂

    • @Chicaso999
      @Chicaso999 Рік тому +9

      😂😂😂😂😂😂

    • @tonimorris6512
      @tonimorris6512 Рік тому +7

      😂😅🤣

  • @philawsonfur
    @philawsonfur Рік тому +420

    The forgotten value of being a committed married man. You don't have anyone to impress but your wife and kids.

    • @cm-yu6gu
      @cm-yu6gu Рік тому +6

      💯💯🎯

    • @mariesolal
      @mariesolal Рік тому

      ❤❤❤

    • @jia1596
      @jia1596 Рік тому +33

      A married man doesn't have to impress his wife and kids either. He has to lead, provide protection, guidance, wisdom. The key is for the wife and children to respect and follow.

    • @Portia620
      @Portia620 Рік тому +1

      @@annabelle818amen sister!!!! Agreed! Some will lead you to the wolf!!!

    • @alrent2992
      @alrent2992 Рік тому +5

      ​@@annabelle818so then women must make better decision. Than to accept a less than worthy man.

  • @dna8269
    @dna8269 Рік тому +3

    Only part i disagree with is gaining more self respect from turning down women. I’ve never felt that despite rejecting numerous women. I usually get the self esteem boost from adding to the notch count

  • @dmoore0079
    @dmoore0079 6 місяців тому +14

    This hit home for me. About 15 years ago, I ran into an ex-girlfriend in crisis. Apparently, her boyfriend had been arrested the night before, and she didn't have a car at the time. I drove her to the various places she thought he might be, but no one had seen him or heard anything. I drove her back to her place and she started flirting with me. I told her that I couldn't go through with it, because I couldn't separate love from sex, and I didn't want to put her in a place of regret. I wished her luck in finding her man, but also told her that she shouldn't settle for someone who doesn't care enough to call in a situation like that. I left feeling pretty good - not necessarily for having the level of restraint to turn her down, but because that restraint allowed me to be there for her in a way that few if any other men had ever been.

    • @astraea9644
      @astraea9644 Місяць тому +2

      Many years ago, a colleague and I had a bit of a flirtation going on, I was not in the greatest place at the time and was quite vulnerable. Anyway, one night when we had all gone out for drinks he ended up staying over. He didn't try anything, even though I knew he fancied me a lot and we had kissed once and I would have been ok with it. At the time he had just gotten out of a long-term relationship and was seeing a lot of women. I actually asked him, why not me? And he said that it was because we were friends and where would that leave us. But I think he just knew he didn't want a relationship with me and didn't want to use me. The funny thing is, I remember this man so fondly and now think this was one of the nicest, most respectful things anyone has ever done for me.

  • @proudatheist2042
    @proudatheist2042 Рік тому +544

    I am a woman. Women need to master self control as well. Women gain self esteem by saying "no" to things and asserting their boundaries, especially women who aren't naturally assertive.

    • @chillie000
      @chillie000 Рік тому +57

      Jordan Peterson really emphasises the critical need for women to develop their masculine side (yes, he specifically says ‘masculine side’).
      I believe what he means by this is the need to become assertive, as women are biologically and socially shaped as more agreeable.

    • @tegathemenace
      @tegathemenace Рік тому +29

      Don't think it has to do with assertiveness
      Just self respect.
      A girl can be shy and switch if you try shii.
      Some can be very outspoken and still passed around.

    • @chillie000
      @chillie000 Рік тому +19

      @@tegathemenace No. One of JP’s core teachings is the need to integrate our aggression so that the iron fist hidden in underneath a velvet glove is wielded skilfully. He says you cannot be genuinely empowered unless you can stand up for yourself (which is obvious). He says you cannot have self-respect unless you can protect your boundaries and assert yourself when necessary (again, obvious).
      I’ve numerous times heard him emphasis women that women are behind the 8 ball in this department because of evolutionary (and socialised) reasons. Women have more agreeable natures because of the need to be sensitive to an infants needs.

    • @proudatheist2042
      @proudatheist2042 Рік тому +4

      @@tegathemenace assertiveness is measured on The Big 5 Personality test. Not everyone is naturally assertive. I had to practice being assertive with the therapist I worked with as a university student. Even after that, being assertive is not something that comes naturally to me, it's my weak point. My Big 5 Personality test shows that I am below average in assertiveness. I have never done many of the things that people regarded as being low in self respect do, but I am just not naturally assertive.

    • @proudatheist2042
      @proudatheist2042 Рік тому +3

      @@chillie000 I have listened to Dr. Peterson for 4 years now. Assertiveness is a subcomponent of Extraversion on The Big 5 Personality test that he sells and taught with at the U of T while he was employed there. Agreeableness is a separate trait in The Big 5. I scored slightly above average in agreeableness, but I scored below average in assertiveness. Being assertive does not come naturally to me. He mentions agreeableness as the trait that allows people to get stepped on and overused, which is true, but he doesn't mention assertiveness often enough. I can't help but wonder how often people who score above average or high in agreeableness simultaneously score below average in assertiveness.

  • @amiyrbarclift1640
    @amiyrbarclift1640 Рік тому +41

    This is so important in many aspects of a man’s life. Having discipline and being discrete. Especially in our current world where everything is on sale.

  • @Largeandincharge22
    @Largeandincharge22 Рік тому +130

    I totally agree with this. Abstaining from alcohol and not masturbating has levelled up my mind in ways I didn’t even know was possible. 😊

    • @dmitry5319
      @dmitry5319 Рік тому +4

      what does "level up my mind" mean?

    • @Fred-zt5ky
      @Fred-zt5ky Рік тому

      @@dmitry5319probably nothing concrete, it just makes him feel better about himself without actually producing anything

    • @Bootsystem66
      @Bootsystem66 Рік тому +8

      Never identify with anything. It's not the alcohol or masturbation but being controlled by it. Abstinence has its limit and could harm you if uncontrolled.

    • @royalhumbler2767
      @royalhumbler2767 Рік тому +17

      ⁠@@Bootsystem66Abstinence of alcohol can NEVER harm you. For the majority of people complete abstinence is easier than moderation.

    • @mickvonbornemann3824
      @mickvonbornemann3824 Рік тому

      @@royalhumbler2767 You’re been hanging around way too many alcoholics if you think the majority of people are alcoholics. Not being able to consume alcohol in moderation being the definition of an alcoholic. The reality is in regards those with addictive personalities, including alcoholism, is that they correlate with about 20 disorders, mostly mental disorders & personality disorders but others too, for example hyperthyroidism. These add up to maybe some 20%, probably less, the other 80+% have no problem consuming alcohol in moderation. It’s for similar reasons that they vast majority of people giving narcotic analgesics in hospital, even for weeks, don’t get addicted to them, even though a small minority will.
      Near 70% of addicts, including alcoholics, , are like that as a result of having anyone of the 4 Cluster B personality disorders, the balance will have one of the disorders below, like ADHD, ADD, schizophrenia, schizo affective, GAD, SAD, hyperthyroidism, FASD, PTSD, or the 7 cluster A or C personality disorders.
      For example 18% of alcoholics have Avoidant Personality Disorder & that’s one of the most uncommon of the 20 in that list. Of course it doesn’t mean everyone with one of these disorders is an addict, just that the odds are at least double, which added together basically fills the whole quota.

  • @chewonthisfishing
    @chewonthisfishing 2 місяці тому

    Agreed, I have actually quoted you to myself maybe 20 times now that my divorce is officially official. Essentially I say: Sadia says
    “who has access to you makes you more valuable than just about anything.”

  • @fmss6694
    @fmss6694 5 місяців тому +1

    You are so right ! I was 38 and dated someone first 10 years and when I asked when will we be married his answer was a joke. I then found the courage to break it off and moved on because I had this crazy feeling that I wanted kids. I thought I was losing it but it’s what my body was craving and now have two amazing kids.

  • @PennyBluebottle
    @PennyBluebottle Рік тому +62

    This woman is very beautiful and so clever too. Really speaks a lot of sense.

  • @LonjeMarie7
    @LonjeMarie7 Рік тому +32

    For me, I’m a woman it’s self control. I don’t have to become intimate with every man that I meet once I discover that and I have been doing that for years I feel so peaceful and so powerful.

    • @jcruisioso5975
      @jcruisioso5975 Рік тому +4

      Yes , this used to be the standard for women. Used to be.

    • @pio7763
      @pio7763 Рік тому +1

      Bragging what your planning to do is worthless. Do it first then talk.

    • @m.d.sharpe8892
      @m.d.sharpe8892 Рік тому +1

      We're not talking about women right now

  • @anthonyhewitt9397
    @anthonyhewitt9397 Рік тому +30

    This is soooo true. I said no more to a really bad relationship recently, for the first time ever I ended a relationship and it's given me so much confidence. Like its a visceral feeling.

    • @Ines-Xh
      @Ines-Xh Рік тому +1

      First few months are crucial. Accept contradictory thaughts and feelings and let them go. Don't give in, don't call him.

    • @Realmnewman
      @Realmnewman Рік тому

      Welldone

  • @Sevoflurane2014
    @Sevoflurane2014 22 дні тому

    This is fact. I changed my entire Outlook on health this last year after my breakup. I got back to the gym consistently, my diet has been more on point and I've gotten shredded. This attitude helping myself esteem and now I've had many options with girls to have relationships and I've turned them down and they were nice looking girls. Now I'm getting mentally strong to be picky on who I'm with. I want someone eventually but right now I'm content on being single until I find the right fit for me

  • @JeremyBurns
    @JeremyBurns 6 місяців тому

    THIS!
    I've been working on myself the past three years at an all new level. Found myself with a lot of free time after my ONE bailed out after 20 and 5.
    Closed my business to work on ME.
    Learned FAST, Selfcontrol can be the hardest to get. Harder than stopping Ribeyes!
    What POWER, KNOWING you can now TRUST YOURSELF, no matter what...
    Discipline is Power, Selfconrol without limit is #1 "everything".
    Best feeling ever.😮 Hate it took 50 to get this.

  • @caracarley3840
    @caracarley3840 Рік тому +98

    A man who has self control and takes care of his body and has his profession down is 🔥🔥🔥

    • @marias6583
      @marias6583 Рік тому +3

      Yes!!!

    • @honor9lite1337
      @honor9lite1337 Рік тому +2

      As simple as that! 😊

    • @supermarvelgainz
      @supermarvelgainz Рік тому +1

      💯

    • @dmitry5319
      @dmitry5319 Рік тому

      What do you actually mean by self-control? Waking up early? Not drinking? What is this for? Why does this make a man attractive?

    • @dmitry5319
      @dmitry5319 Рік тому

      or, do you mean that he does not jump on every opportunity to have sex? Certainly, this makes him look somewhat desperate, which is not attractive

  • @whattosay385
    @whattosay385 Рік тому +17

    Thank you so much for posting this and god bless her for saying this truth.

  • @fereshtebahaedini6614
    @fereshtebahaedini6614 Рік тому +22

    It’s time to realize what my body wants isn’t necessarily what i want !

  • @Tom-vq2hw
    @Tom-vq2hw Рік тому +58

    A lot of men have literally never had the opportunity to say no to a woman

    • @Thomas-qi9ix
      @Thomas-qi9ix 11 місяців тому +9

      Underrated comment!

    • @khloe38
      @khloe38 8 місяців тому +3

      But for men it's not just women. Where are you demonstrating self control in other areas of your life. Grooming, mental health, self development/education, skill/career development, etc.

    • @Ace.0.0.0.
      @Ace.0.0.0. 7 місяців тому +3

      Not so. Men can say 'no' at anytime. They choose not to because they fear the consequences. Thing is, it's all in the mind.😢

    • @John-zp6lu
      @John-zp6lu 6 місяців тому +3

      I say no to most of the women I meet. And I swipe left on over 90% of women's profiles.
      Most guys are too needy. I'm in an unvaxxed dating group on FB. It's the first time I've ever seen what other men are like when interacting with women. I was amazed by all of the beta, low T energy these guys put out to women.
      Guys need to work on themselves and level up, not chase women. Be all that you can be and women will chase you.

    • @MerandaYt
      @MerandaYt 6 місяців тому +4

      ​@@John-zp6lu​
      I agree on some of what you're saying, but I've always thought it's so weird when men expect women to go after them when most men don't respect or appreciate women who do, and im speaking from experience.
      It's a weird toxic cycle, if you like a woman and she aligns with your values just go propose. Men playing hard to get but hating on women who go after them will always amaze me.
      Most men have always been the pursuers, then some men say something like what you're saying "be too good that women chase you", and most men don't like women who pursue, it's a game that women just can't win, and this is so far from a healthy beautiful relationship that lasts with peace and a lovely family.
      You probably don't mean all the stuff im saying but im trying to show you how weird and conflicting it seems, and it feels like most men just don't want to be vulnerable and admit they actually want a woman to be the love of their life because people will say they're simps right?
      What's wrong with a man thinking: "i want to level up and be the best version of myself, and that vision happens to have a good female partner that we can both support each other "?
      Why is it so hard for most men to be vulnerable and authentic instead of masking their needs with anger at all women or defensiveness?

  • @focusfitwarrior
    @focusfitwarrior Рік тому +7

    Discipline & structure is the key to life.

  • @Ojashvi_Singh
    @Ojashvi_Singh Рік тому +90

    That is the best piece of advice for both men and women. Thankyou for bringing that up.

    • @innertubez
      @innertubez Рік тому +2

      Yeah she is 100 percent right

    • @andreas.9175
      @andreas.9175 Рік тому +2

      …AND women. Unfortunately “authenticity” contradicts that.

    • @Ojashvi_Singh
      @Ojashvi_Singh Рік тому

      true that@@andreas.9175

  • @joncarbone
    @joncarbone Рік тому +57

    Correct. I’ve lost 20lbs over the last yr. Abs are showing now. Takes a lot of discipline

  • @ginevrajdeluca6589
    @ginevrajdeluca6589 Рік тому +1

    So much more to this - Not about control, but about discernment and personal responsibility. In order to access authenticity, you have to be willing to explore life and sometimes look like a fool. Men need to get to their authentic selves as much as women do.

  • @eddiethompson7672
    @eddiethompson7672 Рік тому +3

    Self control resonates with me. Thank you❤😊

  • @6334-t9e
    @6334-t9e Рік тому +212

    This IS my definition of a REAL MAN...SELF CONTROL ❤

    • @MikeKollin
      @MikeKollin Рік тому +7

      So what's a REAL woman?

    • @deezgutz5330
      @deezgutz5330 Рік тому +2

      So do women need self control tho?

    • @whiterodman
      @whiterodman Рік тому +2

      ​@MikeKollin they don't think about what they do. We have to be the bad guy to justify their erratic behavior.

    • @RvR_22
      @RvR_22 Рік тому +3

      Tara and when do you start talking about accountability ,responsibility or loyalty for women? You all act like children as if that all a fantasy pink unicorn game!

    • @ExilixE
      @ExilixE Рік тому +3

      NO it is discipline. Discipline is what makes a man, not eat fatty food, go to the gym n workout, work on your business, succeed, provide etc. It is slightly different. Self-Control is like gaslighting men to not sleep around with women. If you are doing all the right things in life, being humble, kind to everyone, treating people good, and succeeding in life, then you should be able to enjoy women to the fullest. It's discipline that's key to men

  • @Joelthompsoncoach
    @Joelthompsoncoach Рік тому +8

    Thank you for giving this incredible message a platform 🙏🏽😮‍💨🗣️

  • @treywoods4191
    @treywoods4191 Рік тому +9

    Refreshing to hear this from one of the ladies. She gets it. Bravo!

  • @Ceddy_T
    @Ceddy_T Рік тому +75

    More men need to hear this! 🎯

    • @spectershore4482
      @spectershore4482 10 місяців тому

      Yep ! Unfortunately, there are so many boys and kids out here...

    • @moe808
      @moe808 5 місяців тому +1

      This advice is for a small percentage of men attracting women. Self control should apply to a guys mission and purpose.

  • @sikasbkoju3715
    @sikasbkoju3715 Рік тому +1

    Agree with you , totally yess.

  • @tededo
    @tededo Рік тому +16

    I keep listening to this short several times throughout the day.

    • @alanh7247
      @alanh7247 Рік тому

      my good man.. your overconsumption of this content is exactly what she's talking about. . you really need to learn to control yourself...

    • @tededo
      @tededo Рік тому +1

      @@alanh7247 You never know who's hiding behind the keyboard sir. You have no idea who am I. So please.

  • @lifeofsukanti
    @lifeofsukanti Рік тому +60

    Yes. 100%. I’m a Hare Krishna and my husband was a monk for 10 years. We have many friends who were/are monks. I can tell you firsthand that self-control and discipline is the cornerstone to healthy masculinity ❤️
    The men I know that were/are monks & missionaries, practicing celibacy for some time, and practicing austerities like simple diet, little sleep, and restriction to materialistic gains, are some of the most responsible, confident, empowered men that I have ever met.
    I can honestly say that it’s very rare for me to meet the average American that could compare. It’s not that guys fault, it’s just that he has imbibed a culture that values excess sense pleasure and materialism.

    • @Bootsystem66
      @Bootsystem66 Рік тому +1

      Good luck. Hope the monks don't use phones or vehicles. Should be ridding horses... because these are material things made by the man who lacks control

    • @LowCostVideo
      @LowCostVideo Рік тому +6

      @@Bootsystem66 Do not belittle her point. Her point still stands, regardless of whether they use technology are not. Your comment is not relevant to her point.

    • @Bootsystem66
      @Bootsystem66 Рік тому

      @LowCostVideo clearly she's fake. Just watch her wooden and decorated facial expression. I know someone with an ulterior agenda when I see one.
      Abortion is a fact and dangerous to both unborn babies and women. Why not talk about female masturbation?
      I've not seen a serial killer, rapist that was encouraged by porn or masturbation. Her lecture is misguided.. and hideous.
      In fact, she looks dodgy to me. No discernable body language or facial expression you can identify as human and normal
      As for the monk lady, I agree with her point, but clearly, not everyone should be a monk. The apology is extreme. Bill Gates, Elon Musk, etc. are not monks, but they brought changes to the world. And they're Western men.... Her point is over the top to me

    • @pault5787
      @pault5787 Рік тому +4

      Hare Krishna monks don't shun electronics and technology idiots 😅 Hare Krishna 🙌 Thank you for sharing, as all of the great religions of the world are based on sense control

    • @lifeofsukanti
      @lifeofsukanti Рік тому

      Thanks @@LowCostVideo :)

  • @Evolutionize2
    @Evolutionize2 Рік тому +10

    I believe self control actually is the absolute best advice for both women and men..reason why i say this is because exactly as was said..women listening to their bodies..where our hormones are all over the place..exactly why we have to learn to control emotions and whatever as well..

    • @nancyinthegarden3160
      @nancyinthegarden3160 Рік тому

      why do we have to control emotions? Why when there’s no control out here today
      kids are out of control
      parents do want to do the work so the kids are taking over the role.
      no polite manners in medical, educational, religious ceremonies, funerals are a party with open bars? everything is out of control
      I agree men who aren’t feasting on every woman giving them attention, are more attractive bc they’re not prowling around where women are.
      She is 100% correct. I never thought a come on from a man was flattering. Men and women today are really obnoxious with their screaming sexual behavior. Where has the lure gone? there’s nothing left to imagine bc it’s ok let’s go to bed on the first date

  • @DinisnBanze
    @DinisnBanze 4 місяці тому

    100% I Love ❤️ this insightful message. Thank you

  • @matthewnewland9282
    @matthewnewland9282 Місяць тому

    Well said. Thank you for explaining.

  • @isabel8965
    @isabel8965 Рік тому +7

    Thats so cool. I loved especially the last bit about treating depression

  • @jeanannedupratt7075
    @jeanannedupratt7075 Рік тому +6

    You do not have to reject a woman to gain self control.
    You chose to practice denial.
    When you master your appetite.
    Please choose your words wisely.
    Not control, Mastery.
    Not reject, but looking only with the eyes.
    I agree with the gym for both men + women.

  • @ThisCreepingLife
    @ThisCreepingLife Рік тому +11

    Having the ability to say no to your impulses is the true form of freedom, not doing whatever you urge to do

  • @tanjeetstephens5730
    @tanjeetstephens5730 7 місяців тому

    You are so correct...self discipline is the key to your aligned self.. when a man has no self control..it can be felt by the one who truly loved him. I won't go back now. 💓💥💓💥

  • @karmagal1796
    @karmagal1796 Рік тому

    I’m the mother of two sons and a teacher. I teach self control all the time. It’s the one thing I can do to give them great positive power over their own lives. Great message!

  • @Mmmmkaaay
    @Mmmmkaaay Рік тому +48

    "Elegance is refusal."
    -Coco Chanel

  • @yipi6682
    @yipi6682 Рік тому +13

    Regardless of gender: self control + authenticity is key. She is communicating it in a way as they would be opposite powers.

    • @girlsaturn8621
      @girlsaturn8621 Рік тому

      It went over your head haha. From birth men are taught to be themselves, to do what best benefits them and makes them look/feel good. They do that innately so it doesn’t need to be said, but what they don’t innately do is self control because they weren’t taught. On the other hand women are raised to always put others before themselves, be nice be nurturing and doing what you want as a women in any way is taboo. So we innately know self control, but not authenticity.

  • @AshAndCream
    @AshAndCream Рік тому +107

    This woman speaks the truth like she's paid to. I've only said yes to a handful, literally less than five women. Self control is control and control is everything.

    • @LateNightCable
      @LateNightCable Рік тому +29

      Right, as if women as propositioning you left and right. What red light district do you live in?

    • @liggmabawls5634
      @liggmabawls5634 Рік тому +9

      @@LateNightCablelmao this is facts.

    • @hurrifanc.3434
      @hurrifanc.3434 Рік тому +4

      ​@@LateNightCable😂savage

    • @DimitriTheBarbarian
      @DimitriTheBarbarian Рік тому +12

      I’ve said Yes to EVERY women who looked my way. Old young pretty ugly skinny fat married single baggage no baggage. The reason I said Yes is because women are the ones choosing here. As a man I patiently wait, sometimes for years. So no, I am not gonna say NO to anyone

    • @oli7120
      @oli7120 Рік тому +1

      Because you're in scarcity
      You sound like the kinda guy dumb enough to tell a girl your actual body count
      Guys like you have no options and end up getting attached to low value women past their prime who use you for your resources while fucking alphas they're actually attracted to.

  • @SleepyBabyTurtles-ke4yh
    @SleepyBabyTurtles-ke4yh Місяць тому +1

    Thank you mam,for your valuable sugasion ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤

  • @sipioc
    @sipioc 5 місяців тому

    I needed to hear this. Thank you

  • @Jay_Hendrix
    @Jay_Hendrix Рік тому +33

    Can confirm. Holding a boundary firmly is a massive display of strength, and you notice it.

  • @Bogdanspath
    @Bogdanspath Рік тому +13

    This epizode was so insightful. Ms. Khan is a great guest and she definitely has my respect.

  • @alexmanga4897
    @alexmanga4897 Рік тому +17

    ❤She is beautiful.

  • @ezalife
    @ezalife Рік тому

    That difference is fascinating and something I've never heard before. Completely rings true and makes sense and one of the more useful insights

  • @samenglish7320
    @samenglish7320 Рік тому +1

    That makes a lot of sense, self control is key to inner peace.

  • @noodleresidue
    @noodleresidue Рік тому +27

    “Your body tells you when you’re craving a child” all my body tells me it’s craving is Taco Bell so I should probably practice self-control too 😂

  • @alaakela
    @alaakela Рік тому +28

    This is true for women too. I cannot respect anyone who just let their hormones run wild. Male or female. Living in society, being successful requires anyone to practice self-control and discipline.

  • @Ladeliciadelinda
    @Ladeliciadelinda Рік тому +60

    Self discipline is so important for self/inner work but like everything else it's a balance. Some people are really hard on themselves. But in this situation that Sadia is referring to, she's right. You take back power when you can reject and say no. We all have hedonistic tendencies. Some are harmless but some are very harmful for you and your loved ones so choose wisely

    • @lifter1000
      @lifter1000 Рік тому +1

      That's right but only if you have who to reject ☝️

    • @confidential303
      @confidential303 Рік тому

      She is not right , self control is not gender specific..rather then who can't control him her self.. I see she is using a subtle programming for man and woman

  • @paulyoung1685
    @paulyoung1685 4 місяці тому

    I needed to hear that today! Thank you ❤

  • @cornells.1367
    @cornells.1367 2 місяці тому

    Wow! So true...she really is amazing.

  • @ZFKATNBADGER40
    @ZFKATNBADGER40 Рік тому +83

    More men need to listen to this

    • @Bootsystem66
      @Bootsystem66 Рік тому

      I think lecturing men does not really help while disempowering and telling them they're no good. Women need training, lol. They've become worse than their mothers.
      If a woman plays with dildos or aborts babies, it's her body. She can do whatever she likes. I don't get it

    • @Stormhertug
      @Stormhertug Рік тому +8

      Why??
      I personally think it`s a better advice for women. Since they statistically cheat more in relationships, just to force their partner to comform to their wishes.

    • @me8751
      @me8751 Рік тому

      ​@@Stormhertug Exactly. Even the ugliest ogre of a woman has a higher body count than the average man.

    • @wyleecoyotee4252
      @wyleecoyotee4252 Рік тому

      ​@@Stormhertug
      Statistically men cheat more in relationships

    • @diana.290
      @diana.290 Рік тому

      ​@@StormhertugUm....where did you get your facts from? 20% of men cheat while only 13% of women cheat.

  • @naished
    @naished Рік тому +35

    Rejecting low quality women really is a super power and I encourage every guy here to do it as often as possible

    • @iamusdamma2637
      @iamusdamma2637 4 місяці тому

      personally notice in australia almost all women are low quality. i have a goal to move to the philipines and get married there. im constantly in my mind ready to reject any and all women if they ever approach me here.

  • @djplasticvibez5581
    @djplasticvibez5581 Рік тому +5

    Thank you this was confirmation 💯❤️

  • @angelasanchez8525
    @angelasanchez8525 Рік тому

    Great interview!!

  • @Ridingrules10000
    @Ridingrules10000 6 місяців тому

    I think this is true about self control. It's been a slow process, but giving up video games, focusing on priorities, saying no to sugary snacks and drinks, generally living with integrity. Still have work to do, but nearly 40 pounds lost and things that used to shame me no longer affect me. It's the freedom of the "guilt-free man". Chase that in your life.

  • @olliemeadows6164
    @olliemeadows6164 Рік тому +8

    It's a shame society naively thinks self control is possible alone, you need community, you need people for support. These kind of messages just isolate men, and don't create a feelings that men can reach out if they are struggling with self control, this video makes it sound like an either or, you are either weak or stoically self controlled. Why not help people to develop self control rather than blasting on about how men need it, how about define it, guide men on how to achieve it. I'm a man of God and I know that self control is not achieved alone, people need help with it.

    • @nenyeo6090
      @nenyeo6090 Рік тому +1

      you need a community for sure. It isn’t going to drop from the sky, so you need to build it with men and women who respect themselves.

    • @ReReChan
      @ReReChan Рік тому +2

      Men need other men and develop a strong community with each other. It’s so solitary living in the west but even more so as a man. As someone from East Asian country, it’s so much easier to bond and form a community between men, as well as women.

    • @avertingapathy3052
      @avertingapathy3052 Рік тому

      Agreed. She's just rehashing some religious or otherwise crude horoscope level dogma which amounts to little more than men are pigs in its implication. Redpill tradwannabe middle age thots really need a market it seems.

    • @iamusdamma2637
      @iamusdamma2637 4 місяці тому

      @@ReReChan thats why im moving there. fuck australia.

  • @bernibeckmann9753
    @bernibeckmann9753 Рік тому +4

    Rarely am I actually impressed buy "lifestyle" advice given by the "prize". Well said.

  • @mellymel766
    @mellymel766 Рік тому +3

    Beautiful words spoken from a beautiful woman 😍 I'm all ears 👂👂

  • @mikeyvega9898
    @mikeyvega9898 Рік тому

    Wow. Very wise words! Thank you for this.

  • @JamesTrouten-gf1zm
    @JamesTrouten-gf1zm Рік тому +1

    That is such a true statement. About the self-esteem

  • @jean-claudezavala8134
    @jean-claudezavala8134 Рік тому

    Enlighting!!! I love Dr. Sadia Khan

  • @lathanturner8608
    @lathanturner8608 7 місяців тому +4

    This doesn’t apply to women, this applies to friends, business offers, or anything in life.

  • @Ayse-wf9es
    @Ayse-wf9es Рік тому +5

    This advice applies for women, too. The woman who is more discriminating and exercises self-control instead of making it easy for just any guy to sleep with her….(so very early on) carries a different sort of aura/energy.
    The problem is that the media (movies, music, commercials, etc) perpetuate a culture of NO self-control in all areas of life and people are following the culture of “no self-control” because the media glamorizes it and makes it appear cooler even tho it comes with negative consequences. For example:
    1) Drinking is glorified…especially drinking to excess. Get drunk …get wasted. It’s considered…..funny, comical. Those who don’y drink are considered bores or not cool enough.
    2) Excess in language. Every other word in each sentence is a curse word. People liberally pepper their sentences with the F-word, the b-word. Heck it’s so common to hear people call blessings such as food “shit”. There are people in this world living in abject poverty and starving while many in 1st world countries take blessing like food for granted and call it….”shit”. Mmm…this shit taste good. It’s sad. There are religions and cultures in this world that consider food to be sacred, something you pray over before eating and now many people in the world address it as “shit”. This is a “low” for us as the human race; we are regressing with language.
    When the quality of language goes on a decline because people no longer exercise …self-control….with the words they say….then we become careless with how we express ourselves with loved ones and it can hurt our relationships. Look at the divorce rate and how kids talk to parents and teachers.
    3) Drama. The more ghetto and loud and in-yo-face we are with expressing ourselves and what happened to us….the “cooler” it appears. But is it? Or is just another manifestation of lack of self control?
    4) Even makeup and clothing. My sister came down for a visit after a long time and said, “Is it just me or are women here now showing more skin a d dressing trashier and skimpier than before?” No, you’re not imagining it. There is a lack of self control which translates into …EXCESS….in skin showing and how you present yourself. The more rips you have in the clothes….the more that you let it all them jiggly-wiggly-bobbly-bits-n-bobs …hang out for the world to see…the “better/cooler” it is. You wouldn’t dare dress like that for a job interview or a funeral because that’s when most people opt for “classiness” ….but they will get angry and defensive if anyone says they skanky-clothes are less than classy.
    5) Promiscuity…the more people you’ve slept with…is treated like a badge of honor.
    People who practice restraint or more self-control in their…. language……their alcohol consumption…..their amount of partying…..the number of sexual partners are….mocked. They are deemed losers and boring by the youth and even those that are older. Self-restraint is mocked in the TV shows too in such a way that people don’t question the subliminal messages that shows send them. Ned Flanders from the Simpsons is mocked for his conservative values and self control by someone as dumb and (lacking in self-control) as Homer Simpson.
    tl;dr: The media (movies, music, TV shows, etc) glorifies and perpetuates a culture of excess and lack of self-control which then becomes a part of society’s culture and shapes views about what is cool and what isn’t.
    Everyone can assert that both men and women need to have more self-control. BUT……..is anyone questioning WHY our society has become deeply rooted in lack of self-control? Has anyone done some “critical thinking” (remember that term from school?” ….and thought about the ….root causes…..behind the problem of excess and no self-control?
    If people can cite the media as being a key contributor to women having low self-esteem because they are constantly bombarded by images of “what beauty should look like”………….then………..can it not be argued that the media also sends messages about what kind of lifestyle is “cool” or “not”….? It sho’ does!

    • @girlsaturn8621
      @girlsaturn8621 Рік тому +1

      It flew over your head lol. From birth men are taught to be themselves, to do what best benefits them and makes them look/feel good. They do that innately so it doesn’t need to be said, but what they don’t innately do is self control because they weren’t taught. On the other hand women are raised to always put others before themselves, be nice be nurturing and doing what you want as a women in any way is taboo. So we innately know self control, but not authenticity. Women who sleep with a guy early on isn’t out of self control, but out of the subconscious to please him because that’s how we are raised, to please everyone. Life is more nuanced than you know but with time you’ll understand

    • @Ayse-wf9es
      @Ayse-wf9es Рік тому

      @@girlsaturn8621 I don’t care to achieve such understanding that you wish me to have. My choices are guided by my religion which prohibits premarital sex and which safeguards women and their integrity. The speaker in the video has kept her language broad enough because she knows her audience will be of different religions and backgrounds. But the speaker herself is also a Muslim and she would understand where I’m coming from.

    • @girlsaturn8621
      @girlsaturn8621 Рік тому

      @@Ayse-wf9es and once again… the point flew over your head lmao

    • @Ayse-wf9es
      @Ayse-wf9es Рік тому

      @@girlsaturn8621 And I believe it flew over your head as well because you’ve become immune to the societal trends to where you cannot recognize which behaviors and practices and choices honor women and which ones diminish their value. We’re not gonna see eye to eye and that’s fine. We can agree to disagree.

    • @Sweet_Cherry_Star
      @Sweet_Cherry_Star 10 місяців тому

      I assume, when people are truly guided by God/higher power they have a good set of principles already ingrained in their habits aka a result of right upbringing. These randoms trends of appearing 'cool' will come and go, but the right way of living has always been self-control and authenticity to ourselves. If someone has a problem with us controlling our impulses, just imagine what type of person that is...just like eve was tempted.

  • @Modern_Tactics
    @Modern_Tactics Рік тому +5

    I’m not super religious albeit grew up in a catholic house hold. I’ve had my fair share of fun and don’t knock against ONS or FWB but it really does seem that the answer for men and women comes back to marriage and kids not endless ONS and hookups

    • @edheldude
      @edheldude Рік тому +2

      Then why live a degenerate life if you think so? Everyone's Socrates after a sinful life.

    • @iamusdamma2637
      @iamusdamma2637 4 місяці тому +1

      @@edheldude we dont. im personally moving to the philipines because i understand how conditional life really is for men and women. in this context the conditions for men suck everywhere nomatter if your successful or not. the philipines these conditions change. suddenly your the prize assuming you have some level of western dollar in which everything is cheap as fuck in the philipines and the women are ACTUALLY loyal.

  • @tennis9811
    @tennis9811 Рік тому

    The fact that deep down inside (especially as a Muslim) I knew this… but had to hear it this way and read all of you wonderful people’s’ comments to fully comprehend this.
    Wow. I love pain. More accurately, I love restricting myself from pleasure. Because true pleasure is knowing that the pleasureful things I will enjoy: were truly meant for me.

  • @Highintensityhealth
    @Highintensityhealth Рік тому

    Brilliant!

  • @NickThiller
    @NickThiller Рік тому +5

    Saying no to a women can often come with unexpected consequences.

  • @davidlittle611
    @davidlittle611 Рік тому +17

    This woman is 10/10. God Bless her.

  • @achilles2174
    @achilles2174 Рік тому +7

    She's good, if she's telling her clients to go to the gym and have some self control with a diet, first. This is the key to most of our problems.

    • @Shane-ju7op
      @Shane-ju7op Рік тому

      No! It's basic information, she using to Grift...

  • @philj5264
    @philj5264 Місяць тому

    ❤❤❤wow ❤❤❤ this lady is super intelligent ❤❤ thank you so much Sadia

  • @tededo
    @tededo Рік тому +46

    Wow. And i shamed myself for saying no many times. I wanted To be like my buddies and sleep around. Wow.

    • @TheHandsomeOne
      @TheHandsomeOne Рік тому +12

      It's a lie bro

    • @kb_799
      @kb_799 Рік тому +19

      Right there with you brother. Society placed a pressure on us to sleep around to feel successful, thats why you felt shame. Your "friends" will literally go out of their way to shame you for stuff like that. Untill you are aware of the reason they do it, they will be successful in their shaming. But now you have gained awereness of this simple reality that is true for many fragile men out there. Keep being strong my friend.

    • @anabltc
      @anabltc Рік тому +6

      Everybody has that phase, now you moved on, it's all good

    • @avertingapathy3052
      @avertingapathy3052 Рік тому +4

      Use discretion. Sometimes it can be worth it. If its times when its culture tying your value to getting laid and the cons of getting emotional damage from types that feel they can toy with you emotionally. Its not worth it. Ghost, ignore, block.

    • @djohnsveress6616
      @djohnsveress6616 Рік тому +2

      Right..
      Or you just defended yourself from shame, from the chance to fail.
      Not so obvious..
      This given me absolutely no context or nuance whatsoever, were you rejecting hook ups or the potential start of something ?
      What are we playing at for, rejecting people just for the sake of rejecting ? Ya good ?
      Maybe you just categorized people into thinking that if they approach you with intensity it cannot be anything other then hook up, if they approach you without it it was to vague for you to make a move on.. but i'm not gonna theorize more.
      TLDR, you cannot control confidence.. You cannot do these things and that to lower it or increase it. You are either confident or you aren't. You may have a reason to reject somebody but sorry, in this context it sounds like bullshit to me and a huge self defense mechanism from failure.

  • @ranman7688
    @ranman7688 Рік тому +6

    So let me get this straight.. a woman can do what she wants to do as long as she feels good about doing it?
    No wonder so many women lack accountability.

    • @edheldude
      @edheldude Рік тому

      Yeah she just want "men" i.e. top 5% men to commit to her.

  • @littlebilly8747
    @littlebilly8747 Рік тому +15

    Self denial should feel amazing, not painful. Having standards is so important to forming your identity as a guy. Do things because you choose to, not because society wants you to

    • @NoOne-ef7yu
      @NoOne-ef7yu Рік тому +1

      Self denial without a long-term value or a goal is just a form of self-harm.
      Without an achievement that makes the pain worthwhile, it's just torture, without rhyme, reason or purpose.

    • @LateNightCable
      @LateNightCable Рік тому

      You can have that no nut November bullsh!t, life is too short for all that. If you’re going to deny yourself, it better be for a purpose, and short term.

    • @littlebilly8747
      @littlebilly8747 Рік тому +2

      @@NoOne-ef7yu It depends on what you are denying yourself

    • @NoOne-ef7yu
      @NoOne-ef7yu Рік тому

      @@littlebilly8747 I really don't think it does - you always have to have something to reach, or some way in which the hardship helps you grow.
      I'd be open for a counterexample, though.

    • @littlebilly8747
      @littlebilly8747 Рік тому +1

      @@NoOne-ef7yu Are you assuming I’m saying that one should not do hard things? What I am saying is people should try to remove short term pleasures that get in the way of their self improvement.

  • @PredragGeorgevic
    @PredragGeorgevic Рік тому +1

    Great advice and very wise words

  • @mrityunjoybhowmick3889
    @mrityunjoybhowmick3889 Рік тому

    I just love this lady. Respect...