Best of Rifftrax 'Cool as Ice'

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  • @paulasmith9736
    @paulasmith9736 6 років тому +172

    Okay, I'm gonna actually have to go and buy this one. Freaking hilarious!

    • @Gazdatronik
      @Gazdatronik 5 років тому +5

      I saw this fucker on Laserdisc. I'm not gonna say its the worst movie I have ever seen but that doesn't stop me from thinking it.

    • @Lgykas
      @Lgykas 3 роки тому +1

      @@Gazdatronik my thoughts exactly

    • @MinscFromBaldursGate92
      @MinscFromBaldursGate92 2 роки тому +3

      The whitest movie ever.

  • @LightForger
    @LightForger 4 роки тому +57

    "Sir could you please leave our wedding? The bride is sobbing"

  • @rahulrt6396
    @rahulrt6396 4 роки тому +45

    "The expression of a person who realised that they are in a Vanilla Ice movie.."
    Priceless..😂

  • @crixxxxxxxxx
    @crixxxxxxxxx 5 років тому +192

    When you actually root for the controlling, rich WASPy boyfriend to win out over the protagonist.

    • @Tareltonlives
      @Tareltonlives 4 роки тому +21

      It's like Twilight-the entire love triangle is made of assholes

    • @DaytonaRoadster
      @DaytonaRoadster 3 роки тому +3

      Better than a fucking wigger

    • @raymonddodd9048
      @raymonddodd9048 3 роки тому +20

      Vanilla is the kind of douchebag that would honk his horn when arriving at a girlfriend's house. Or in this case, he would loudly rev his bike.

    • @typacsk
      @typacsk Рік тому

      "Mrs. Doubtfire" did it better.

    • @platogenova9573
      @platogenova9573 Місяць тому

      Ever wondered why the villain was always a WASP 🤔🤔

  • @Nightweaver1
    @Nightweaver1 5 років тому +121

    Ever watch a movie that dates itself so hard that it seems like a parody of the era it was made in?

    • @ffreed
      @ffreed 10 місяців тому +3

      This movie seems so proud to (sort of) depict one entire second of the 1990s.

  • @stevenatkinson1049
    @stevenatkinson1049 5 років тому +62

    "The embodiment of my sisters poor self esteem" I laughed so hard I was wheezing!

  • @CalebMcFarland
    @CalebMcFarland 6 років тому +65

    The girl is like ‘I love how he mocks
    and belittles others in order to impress me.’

  • @PatTheBatmanFan
    @PatTheBatmanFan 6 років тому +116

    "And so the Burger King Kids Club was formed."

  • @magemega4262
    @magemega4262 3 роки тому +25

    "gah! Hide your queen samples!"
    Lol... So good.

  • @Palmieres
    @Palmieres 5 років тому +41

    My best friend in highschool actually loved this movie and thought Mr Ice was suave with that yup yup line.
    I... I can't explain it. I wish we lived closer to each other so I could persuade her to watch this again now that she's in her early 40s and a mother of two.

    • @ladycheyne5607
      @ladycheyne5607 5 років тому +8

      My best friend and I used to rent this every Friday at the local Harco pharmacy. We even had his posters from the teen magazines on our wall. I still have my posters and I bought this movie for her birthday. (We're also 40)🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

  • @erinwalker6185
    @erinwalker6185 6 років тому +107

    Vanilla Ice wanted to be James Dean.He couldn't even be Jimmy Dean!

    • @docdave15
      @docdave15 3 роки тому +6

      Rowlf the Dog wouldn't be caught dead with Vanilla Ice!

    • @losttribe3001
      @losttribe3001 3 роки тому +13

      HOW DARE YOU COMPARE VANILLA ICE WITH JIMMY DEAN! Do not defame Jimmy Dean like that! 😆😆

    • @Thunderchild-gz4gc
      @Thunderchild-gz4gc 2 роки тому +9

      Jimmy Dean made fine sausages though.

    • @shawnfields2369
      @shawnfields2369 2 роки тому +1

      @@Thunderchild-gz4gc Yep, yep. He sure did, yep, yep.

    • @nostalgicwiz3977
      @nostalgicwiz3977 Рік тому

      And Jimmy Dean makes good bacon 🥓

  • @mikewilson1627
    @mikewilson1627 6 років тому +74

    Hide your queen samples!

  • @manicpixiefangirl4189
    @manicpixiefangirl4189 6 років тому +118

    One more Yep and he’s going to become Ducky from The Land Before Time.

    • @wadecarmen7501
      @wadecarmen7501 5 років тому +1

      Which Land Before Time?

    • @Tareltonlives
      @Tareltonlives 4 роки тому +10

      Ducky was more dignified and mature

    • @MrBlueSkyof1607
      @MrBlueSkyof1607 2 роки тому +1

      @@Tareltonlives This dude's not even going to become Ducky from Pretty in Pink, Ice is so immature.

  • @MsDefectiveToaster
    @MsDefectiveToaster 6 років тому +184

    It's strange that all the people in HIS OWN MOVIE seem to be kind of weirded out by him. It's like the opposite of a vanity piece.

    • @tracywalker6813
      @tracywalker6813 2 роки тому +10

      Was he really supposed to come off like Hip Hop Johnny Bravo? This was intentional?

    • @geoffreysorkin5774
      @geoffreysorkin5774 Рік тому +8

      @@tracywalker6813 Whenever he's not in his Vanilla Ice persona in real life, he comes off as a normal guy who got his 15 minutes and went back to being just another guy after it ended. I'm fairly certain he was in on the joke for this movie.

    • @choosecarefully408
      @choosecarefully408 Рік тому +2

      @@tracywalker6813 I think that Mike's "he was the inspiration for 'Poochie' on 'The Simpsons,' right?" was possibly The Most Dead-on remark that could be made about him. Or at least it _would_ be. But let's face it, in real life, women fall for cool acts like him. The alternative is what? Guys who don't even act cool?

    • @ZERO_O7X
      @ZERO_O7X Рік тому +1

      Ice needs to team up with John Dehart for the ultimate movie mash-up.

  • @ImpossibleCakePro
    @ImpossibleCakePro 4 роки тому +42

    "We could really use that clown gang from 'Akira' right now"

    • @shawnfields2369
      @shawnfields2369 3 роки тому +2

      To run him over? I forgot what they did in that movie. I haven't seen "Akira" in a long time.

    • @worsethanhitlerpt.2539
      @worsethanhitlerpt.2539 2 роки тому +4

      I love how the family in this movie is helpless against the bad guys, when theyre in WITNESS PROTECTION.
      Like they cant call the Feds and get re-located again

    • @rjzavala87
      @rjzavala87 Рік тому

      I missed that the first time i watched this. Hilarious.

  • @tonywilliams6428
    @tonywilliams6428 Рік тому +7

    "So whaddya gonna do, college girl?" "I'm not sure yet, G.E.D. failer." 🤣

  • @rshelley7496
    @rshelley7496 6 років тому +102

    Imagine watching this WITHOUT the rifftrax...😫😫😫😫

    • @shawnfields2757
      @shawnfields2757 5 років тому +5

      Robert Shelley As a joke or if you wanted to riff this movie with your friends? Or something along those lines would still be a good reason to watch this, right? I don't have any friends though.

    • @robshelley1073
      @robshelley1073 5 років тому +5

      @@shawnfields2757 sure you have friends lol.. but like me, if we made them sit through this movie we might lose them LOL

    • @shawnfields2757
      @shawnfields2757 5 років тому +1

      Rob Shelley You sure I've got friends? Thanks anyway. I wouldn't subject my friends(if I had any, I mean), to this movie, unless it was the Rifftrax version. I've lost enough friends to last 2 or 3 lifetimes. I don't want to lose anymore, dude.

    • @scraps992
      @scraps992 5 років тому +1

      I imagine it'd be analogous to going into surgery without anesthesia.

    • @Jenny010132
      @Jenny010132 5 років тому +1

      No.

  • @mr.vidjagamez9896
    @mr.vidjagamez9896 5 років тому +49

    where is the sequel where 2 weeks later, Cat realizes the TERRIBLE mistake she had made and returns home as a social outcast and is forced to get a job at a local IGA as a cashier?

  • @christopherwall2121
    @christopherwall2121 5 років тому +27

    "Oh no, Spencer's Gifts is selling door-to-door now?"

  • @Lonewolf6565
    @Lonewolf6565 6 років тому +125

    The entire plot to this movie is a grown man trying to sleep with a high school girl... A girl he doesnt know and nearly kills thirty seconds after seeing her for the first time. Also, he breaks into her house and watches her sleep... And he continues to stalk her after her and her family tell him to leave.

    • @Lonewolf6565
      @Lonewolf6565 5 років тому +17

      @ironduke0775 yes but twilight is written to pander to sixteen year old girls with bad boy syndrome. This movie is creepy and pathetic.

    • @noldavie473
      @noldavie473 3 роки тому +18

      Also, two mobsters are there and want to blackmail the dad who's big plot revelation is that his name is Hackett.

    • @TheBelieveit1
      @TheBelieveit1 3 роки тому +9

      So the exact plot of Twilight?

    • @danmount9462
      @danmount9462 3 роки тому +9

      In the words of Linkara "Our hero, Ladies and gentlemen."

    • @WolfRider2002
      @WolfRider2002 2 роки тому +2

      @@TheBelieveit1 hey give Twilight some credit. At least Bella was clearly into it the whole time and didn't have a boyfriend before Edward came along

  • @Glennyates1025
    @Glennyates1025 5 років тому +56

    Imagine seeing this when it first came out in the theaters? Those are the people you see downtown today walking aimlessly and talking to themselves.

  • @Chipotleadvisory
    @Chipotleadvisory 6 років тому +158

    Vanilla Ice one of the reasons in the 90’s we desperately needed Nirvana.

    • @quester09
      @quester09 6 років тому +7

      SOlson2375 him, and Michael Bolton.

    • @importantmancommenting9336
      @importantmancommenting9336 6 років тому +2

      And the unabomber

    • @thevoid99
      @thevoid99 6 років тому +6

      @@quester09 exactly, that no-talent ass-clown. every time i say that, i hope he's there somewhere every time someone calls him a no-talent ass-clown, he winces in pain. that is why he's still living so we can hurt little by little just to know much it feels to listen to his bullshit music.

    • @collinsnider4179
      @collinsnider4179 6 років тому +10

      AND Alice in Chains AND Soundgarden...

    • @justinpino8115
      @justinpino8115 5 років тому +3

      Nah, vanilla was more fun than that dreary band. The 80s were fun.

  • @ToruKun1
    @ToruKun1 6 років тому +72

    "This bike is worth more than our house!"
    "Even when you include the sex dungeon?"

    • @shawnfields2757
      @shawnfields2757 5 років тому +1

      ToruKun1 Yeah dude, that's why the sex dungeon was so expensive to put in, remember?

  • @gossiperzoroark9629
    @gossiperzoroark9629 3 роки тому +28

    I will always love the reaction to seeing Ice the first time.
    “What the hell is that”

    • @worsethanhitlerpt.2539
      @worsethanhitlerpt.2539 2 роки тому +3

      This movie is like a 2-hour music video its so bad. I think the director had only done videos before

    • @kurtreber9813
      @kurtreber9813 2 роки тому +1

      THANK you

  • @tjwhitfield7654
    @tjwhitfield7654 6 років тому +29

    The Prince refrence, and the "Yo Im like the White Batman!" Dead.😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

  • @jamesmarhen
    @jamesmarhen 6 років тому +31

    My favorite riff of the movie I didn't see but me and my friends couldn't stop laughing when they said "I loved your song Informer." Still crack up at that riff.

    • @richardschaffer8740
      @richardschaffer8740 5 років тому +3

      Lmao, thats so great

    • @johnt.campbell316
      @johnt.campbell316 3 роки тому +1

      Wrong white rapper!!
      lol

    • @choosecarefully408
      @choosecarefully408 2 роки тому

      Wait: people _REMEMBER_ that guy? Cripes, I didn't think anyone ever cared enough to learn his *name* he was gone so quickly.

    • @shawnfields2369
      @shawnfields2369 2 роки тому

      @@choosecarefully408 Yeah, people remember that guy, who's song actually WAS popular WHILE he was in prison, for actually killing someone, and who actually threatened to kill Vanilla Ice himself, no joke. But whats his face was only a one hit wonder, ironically, even though they're both lame, Vanilla Ice was actually successful and slightly popular(for what felt a lot longer than it actually was), even though when "Cool As Ice"; and when Vanilla Ice was "popular" I wasn't even born yet(I'm only 29, I was born in late 1993), and i STILL can't people actually took them BOTH of them seriously! It's laughable, honestly, even though the other guy (snow, yes seriously, they were both actually named after the cold, not lying), he also has a criminal record, but is somehow in even worse shape than Vanilla Ice, and even threatened to kill Ice, because when he threatens someone's life, he apparently always goes through with it, no matter what. That's what I heard anyways. They were both forgotten and terrible rappers, both better left in the past, even though the one time Vanilla was legitimately cool(pun intended), was when he was in "TMNT 2: Secret of the Ooze".

    • @choosecarefully408
      @choosecarefully408 2 роки тому

      @@shawnfields2369 Ooh, additional: *mainstream media* seems to be pushing the narrative that covid was created in a lab. (It's how I can actually expect my comment to not get deleted despite mentioning it). I kid you not, there's a video with *Jordan Peterson* discussing it.
      Check out chapters 7 & 8 of the book I linked. It's not the _only source_ for that information, but it's important. Viruses are not bacteria.
      They neither form nor spread the way that's being claimed. So more "facts based upon whatever story our Authority Figures tell us are facts."

  • @supermariofan03
    @supermariofan03 5 років тому +94

    They should have done this when they were still doing MST3K. It was practically gift wrapped for them.

    • @sugreev2001
      @sugreev2001 4 роки тому +12

      There were so many movies from the 80’s and 90’s that they could’ve covered when MST3k was still on the air. Imagine Mike and the bots riffing Samurai Cop or this during their height.

    • @supermariofan03
      @supermariofan03 3 роки тому +7

      @@sugreev2001 Which makes it bittersweet to see them doing movies like this and Samurai Cop on Rifftrax. Don’t get me wrong, the jokes were spot on, but these movies were right there for them while MST3K was still on!

    • @losttribe3001
      @losttribe3001 3 роки тому +10

      @@supermariofan03 I think MST3K used more “public domain” movies in order to not have to pay royalty fees in order to use the movies. With Rifftrax,, at least in this movie’s case, they are able to skirt this by just selling an independent audio track.

    • @supermariofan03
      @supermariofan03 3 роки тому +4

      @@losttribe3001 Cool As Ice was from Universal, and they’re no strangers to MST3K. Hell, they distributed the MST3K movie.

    • @losttribe3001
      @losttribe3001 3 роки тому +1

      @@supermariofan03 I get that and the MST3K the Movie was something unique because Universal opened their vaults and footed the Bill for This Island Earth for them because it was a bigger budgeted theater release. But in the days of Comedy Central and SyFy (which was owned by Universal at the time), they used public domain movies or films with low licensing fees to save on budget. That’s partially why they never riffed well known movies before and is why Rifftrax is the way it is. And I say partially because there’s something Golden in the independent film industry like Birdemic and Manos. But you need to purchase the rights or enter into an agreement if you are to show and make money off of someone else’s work.

  • @Shiirow
    @Shiirow 6 років тому +70

    little known fact, the rap party at the end of Cool as Ice really is the same concert the Ninja Turtles interrupt. It wasnt intentional and the turtle actors animatronics fucked up and they busted through the sound stage wall. the director liked the what Ice was rapping so much, he just included it as part of the movie.

  • @JamaicanCastle
    @JamaicanCastle 6 років тому +47

    12:20 I'd say "still a better love story than Twilight" but, uh, I think this guy is out-Edwarding Edward.

  • @heyitsthatmadhatterperson117
    @heyitsthatmadhatterperson117 3 роки тому +10

    "I looked up from the mustard smear on the table for this?"

  • @Rawk4Life
    @Rawk4Life 6 років тому +50

    Little known fact: the woman playing Vanilla Ice's crush in this movie was one of the kids in the first Home Alone movie. She apparently didn't care if she made it big in Hollywood afterwards since she said yes to being in a Vanilla Ice film. It took a toll on Michael Gross' film career as well since the only other movies he became known for were "Tremors" and all its sequels.

    • @specialpatrolgroup92
      @specialpatrolgroup92 4 роки тому +3

      @SgtBaker16 I was going to say basically the same thing :) especially 4 :)

    • @FunkySaurb456
      @FunkySaurb456 3 роки тому +2

      I checked her IMDB profile. Apparently she had a recurring role in ER from 1995-2003, so at least that's something.

    • @whenfatkillsfat803
      @whenfatkillsfat803 2 роки тому +1

      He did the role to impress his 8 year old son and failed.

    • @choosecarefully408
      @choosecarefully408 2 роки тому

      Umm, I don't think Michael Gross' career was going anywhere anyway. How in demand are former TV sitcom dads? Ever?
      When Alan Thicke got "Growing Pains" everyone thought it was a big step _up_ for him.

    • @MrBlueSkyof1607
      @MrBlueSkyof1607 Рік тому +5

      Although to be fair, it's best we only remember him from the Tremors movies.

  • @csgrambauer5852
    @csgrambauer5852 6 років тому +26

    6:15 - "Wow, for a straight girl she sure writes a lot of lesbian poetry". Lmao for some reason this had me in tears of laughter. xD

  • @geoffreysorkin5774
    @geoffreysorkin5774 Рік тому +7

    I was born the same day this was released in theatres. That's right, I'm an ice ice baby.

  • @nataliewaters7415
    @nataliewaters7415 6 років тому +29

    I can't pick a favorite quote on this one. Every scene was hilariously funny.

    • @shawnfields2757
      @shawnfields2757 5 років тому

      Natalie Waters That's why a Best Of Rifftrax should just be the entire thing.

  • @Ryfinius
    @Ryfinius 6 років тому +48

    even this drastically shortened, riffed version of a movie is difficult to watch

  • @austingrisham7479
    @austingrisham7479 5 років тому +21

    As the story goes Gwyneth Paltow was originally cast to be the female lead of this movie. Her father, a well known TV producer, forbade her from being in the movie. Dodged a bullet on that one Gwyneth!

    • @livelybubbs6242
      @livelybubbs6242 4 роки тому +10

      Buuut he didn’t stop her from making goop juice. He’s a failure as a parent

    • @EddieHawkinsII
      @EddieHawkinsII 8 місяців тому

      @@livelybubbs6242He was dead by that point.

    • @livelybubbs6242
      @livelybubbs6242 8 місяців тому +1

      @@EddieHawkinsII in hindsight, my comment was pretty shitty. Oof

    • @zombiedodge1426
      @zombiedodge1426 5 місяців тому

      She missed out on the chance to work with the Oscar-nominated cinematographer of SCHINDLER’S LIST. Thanks, Bruce Paltrow!

    • @walkintobrickwallsfordays8756
      @walkintobrickwallsfordays8756 3 місяці тому

      ​@@EddieHawkinsII did the goop kill him?

  • @pisceanx8382
    @pisceanx8382 5 років тому +27

    There are some movies that even these guys can't salvage. I remember when this movie was new and it was in theaters for a week, then pulled. Straight to video within a month. Vanilla Ice said it was to spite him 'cause we were all out to get him. No joke.

    • @pittland44
      @pittland44 3 роки тому +9

      I really hope that they were out to get him. This movie was beyond bad.

    • @mikejohnson3338
      @mikejohnson3338 3 роки тому +2

      Mike and Co salvaged this big time... yep yep.

    • @choosecarefully408
      @choosecarefully408 2 роки тому +4

      He's one of those people who has no ability to see his faults. Tommy Wiseau springs to mind. Too many women mistake this for self-confidence when he's really just blind to his weaknesses.

    • @MinscFromBaldursGate92
      @MinscFromBaldursGate92 2 роки тому +4

      @Choose Carefully
      So he's like Steven Seagal?

  • @CameronBrooks
    @CameronBrooks 3 місяці тому +3

    I’m amazed this hasn’t attracted the same size of a fan base as THE ROOM 😂

  • @charlesajones77
    @charlesajones77 6 років тому +63

    Vanilla Ice turned 50 last year.I had no idea he was that old.

    • @wadecarmen7501
      @wadecarmen7501 5 років тому +12

      That is also his IQ.

    • @douglasquaid140
      @douglasquaid140 5 років тому +1

      @@wadecarmen7501 😂😂🤣

    • @dildonius
      @dildonius 5 років тому +4

      Bro, 1990 was 30 years ago. Time to face reality, champ.

    • @Daemon__Sultanah
      @Daemon__Sultanah 5 років тому

      @@dildonius As long as he's not the main character in any more movies, I don't care.

    • @ashishavin8748
      @ashishavin8748 4 роки тому

      I am sure he ain’t great as any character.

  • @mrmusickhimself
    @mrmusickhimself 4 роки тому +25

    Ice's career was already fading before Cool as Ice was even FILMED, this movie didn't stand a chance.
    TMNT 2 gave him 5 more minutes, then Arsenio happened, and here we are.

    • @MinscFromBaldursGate92
      @MinscFromBaldursGate92 2 роки тому +4

      What happened with Arsenio?

    • @kman215
      @kman215 3 місяці тому

      ​@@MinscFromBaldursGate92he was basically caught lying about his life.

  • @chillydawgg4354
    @chillydawgg4354 5 років тому +15

    this is the 80s bleeding into the early 90s

  • @adamfowler5475
    @adamfowler5475 6 років тому +14

    "It's like he's puking what were all thinking" LOL

  • @markiangooley
    @markiangooley 6 років тому +88

    I love how the female lead looks like a student teacher in training at the school, not an actual high school student. She was 25 or 26 when this was made and although she’s cute as a button she looks her age.

    • @keymaster2024
      @keymaster2024 6 років тому +2

      markiangooley you sound your age by typing 12

    • @dragonkeeper19600
      @dragonkeeper19600 5 років тому +18

      To be fair, no one wants to see Vanilla Ice creepin' on an actual teenager.

    • @irishandirie
      @irishandirie 5 років тому +3

      @@dragonkeeper19600 Remember folks, he likes old ladies. This was right about the time he was licking the gap in Madonna ' s teeth... or legs... I try not to think about it. Point being, she has him beat by around 10 years.

    • @jonathanwashington6083
      @jonathanwashington6083 4 роки тому +7

      She does look more appropriate for the role than her middle-aged boyfriend.

    • @choosecarefully408
      @choosecarefully408 2 роки тому +3

      @@dragonkeeper19600 The last four words of that sentence were unnecessary.

  • @PCGamer77
    @PCGamer77 6 років тому +57

    New movie idea for David Giancola: "Vanilla Icebreakers" -- Sean Astin and Rob Van Winkle co-star as two slightly lower-middle class dudes who struggle to fight global terrorism in a slightly upper-middle class world.

    • @wileyschmitt
      @wileyschmitt  6 років тому +8

      I'm sure it will be available in Riff Heaven.

    • @kellyweingart3692
      @kellyweingart3692 4 роки тому +5

      Ice and the Hobbit

    • @kellyweingart3692
      @kellyweingart3692 4 роки тому +5

      also starring Bruce Campbell

    • @kellyweingart3692
      @kellyweingart3692 3 роки тому +4

      that jacket is a crime against humanity

    • @shawnfields2369
      @shawnfields2369 3 роки тому +2

      @@kellyweingart3692 Don't forget the hat, along with his laughably bad dance moves, and his stupid, stupid rap name.

  • @seanc2482
    @seanc2482 5 років тому +13

    (Jumps out window) Wait a second, I look like an idiot.... (turns hat backwards) there! fixed!

  • @user-lb9xw4xf2q
    @user-lb9xw4xf2q 3 роки тому +20

    I'd be interested in a sequel to this movie, set ten years later, where Kathy is struggling with a three low paying jobs because she has no qualifications, and Ice just schlings-a-schlong all day on their couch.

  • @BurgermanForever-nh2vp
    @BurgermanForever-nh2vp 7 місяців тому +2

    This episode is one of the best. Definitely worth a buy. The entire run is full of great riffs and the movie doesnt drag like many do

  • @danielflynn8530
    @danielflynn8530 2 роки тому +5

    The part where they say go ninja go ninja shoo had me rolling. Lol

  • @WayWardWonderer
    @WayWardWonderer 6 років тому +38

    "I like pudding!" - Vanilla Ice

  • @StellarMarvel
    @StellarMarvel 5 років тому +13

    " Hide your Queen samples " lolz

  • @joshl6275
    @joshl6275 4 роки тому +8

    "Some boy trying to ride a pop culture wave he doesn't realize has already broken on the shore..."

  • @stevenwatchorn9816
    @stevenwatchorn9816 3 роки тому +16

    The Oscars for 1991 say Jodie Foster was Best Actress, but Kristin Minter was able to act like she was attracted to Vanilla Ice. No contest.

    • @raymonddodd9048
      @raymonddodd9048 3 роки тому +2

      What people will do for a paycheck.

    • @rjzavala87
      @rjzavala87 Рік тому +1

      Meh. Even if he did look ridiculous, he was rich, famous and the dude was talented. Maybe she actually was kinda into him.

    • @stevenwatchorn9816
      @stevenwatchorn9816 Рік тому

      @@rjzavala87 You may be right. She looks like she is having a good time

  • @matt0044
    @matt0044 2 роки тому +11

    “Yep yep…” Yeah, Ducky from The Land Before Time is very inspirational.

    • @typacsk
      @typacsk Рік тому

      Good thing Judith Barsi didn't have to see this movie come out.

    • @MrBlueSkyof1607
      @MrBlueSkyof1607 Рік тому +1

      He isn't even Ducky from "Pretty in Pink"!

  • @gogglespisano24
    @gogglespisano24 Рік тому +3

    The hammerman joke made me pause it LOL

  • @abundantYOUniverse
    @abundantYOUniverse 3 роки тому +6

    Vanilla Ice looks like if Rick Astley's mom ate radiation poisoned soup while she was pregnant.

  • @leemcdonald1342
    @leemcdonald1342 11 місяців тому +2

    "Electrocuted Daffy Duck."
    That's one heck of a mental image.

  • @JamaicanCastle
    @JamaicanCastle 6 років тому +92

    Ladies and gentlemen: the 90s. We're very, very sorry.

    • @NefariousDreary
      @NefariousDreary 6 років тому +7

      JamaicanCastle This generation had its mistakes, too. like Justin Beiber.

    • @thevoid99
      @thevoid99 6 років тому +7

      @@NefariousDreary except this generation has brought out the worst as it's not just bieber. it's also taylor swift, the kartrashians, bad edm and hip-hop music, bad country music, sjws, pc nazis, alt-right nazis, and all sorts of horrible people.

    • @NefariousDreary
      @NefariousDreary 6 років тому +1

      @@thevoid99 lol sure. it's never been worse than this

    • @NefariousDreary
      @NefariousDreary 5 років тому +1

      @Iafiv Iv That's fine, i wouldn't disagree with that. MY last comment was a sarcastic remark suggesting this generation isn't the worst it's been. There's been worse times of nazis and racism and death and shit.

    • @NefariousDreary
      @NefariousDreary 5 років тому

      @Inthe Garbage believe me they were nowhere near as bad as the 2010s are. They had way more balls and way more imagination. But every generation has its downside. Some are just worse than others

  • @sabbaadams8638
    @sabbaadams8638 3 роки тому +5

    Ok, the Prince joke is the best in the movie! Laughed so hard, my face hurt!

  • @NefariousDreary
    @NefariousDreary 6 років тому +17

    "Do the dandruff!"

  • @urbanplanner7200
    @urbanplanner7200 10 місяців тому +2

    @4:18 I was thinking "that really looks like Glendora, CA" turns out that is where it was filmed.

  • @masonruiz3070
    @masonruiz3070 4 роки тому +7

    I made 4 of my friends sit down and watch this movie with me. I really miss those guys.

  • @GruntGamerProductions
    @GruntGamerProductions 6 років тому +48

    Damn. We never did find out what 'Slinging a Shlong' was.

    • @huskyfaninmass1042
      @huskyfaninmass1042 6 років тому +10

      I thought it was 'Shling a Shlong'.

    • @McSuperfly101
      @McSuperfly101 6 років тому +29

      It’s Sean Connery trying to sing a nursery rhyme.

    • @PhilBagels
      @PhilBagels 6 років тому +9

      Here's a hint: "shlong" means "penis".

    • @markiangooley
      @markiangooley 6 років тому +4

      PhilBagels yep, from the Yiddish word for snake, originally a euphemism.

    • @Rawk4Life
      @Rawk4Life 6 років тому +6

      In other words, he thought he was going to get lucky and convince his love interest to have sex with him.

  • @Tareltonlives
    @Tareltonlives 4 роки тому +8

    "I'll be over here doing this!"

  • @werwere8102
    @werwere8102 6 років тому +10

    I was 6-7 years old when Vanilla was topping the charts and I remember having deep respeckt for his wardrobe decisions and shaving things in his hair

    • @joshl6275
      @joshl6275 4 роки тому +4

      Amazing how times change.

    • @johnt.campbell316
      @johnt.campbell316 3 роки тому +3

      It's funny how we'd mostly all be lying if we said we _didn't_ find him cool; at least for a (very) short amount of time.

    • @choosecarefully408
      @choosecarefully408 2 роки тому +2

      @@johnt.campbell316 I didn't cringe upon seeing him because I was fifty. The _instant_ I saw him I was "he's a great singer/songwriter based on how he dresses." All the music is stolen & the lyrics say nothing whatever.
      Just _looking_ at hi makes me feel hollow inside...

    • @ZERO_O7X
      @ZERO_O7X Рік тому

      I was about the same age at the time and I vividly remember begging my mom to let me shave the sides of my head short so I could get line designs shaved into it. 😂 God, I was such a dork!

  • @jamesschmitt8543
    @jamesschmitt8543 5 років тому +6

    Well, now I know coworker’s found my “yup yups” so hilarious

    • @jamesschmitt8543
      @jamesschmitt8543 5 років тому +2

      Apparently, I’m the one person it caught on with

  • @danieljarvis9171
    @danieljarvis9171 5 років тому +11

    "Ill be over here doing this."

  • @RobertApel
    @RobertApel 4 місяці тому +1

    Never saw this movie all the way through, but I wouldn't mind paying money for a Rifftrax treatment screening of this show.😂😅 Just shows that life does have a sense of humor 😁😊.😂😅

  • @rshelley7496
    @rshelley7496 6 років тому +48

    Just happened to check out this movie's Wikipedia... actually states that the director has since dis owned this movie...😂😂😂😂😂😂

  • @rshelley7496
    @rshelley7496 6 років тому +10

    2 men synchronized clap dancing..pretty sure this is how hell's angels used to intimidate squares too

  • @BrianYapleOfficial
    @BrianYapleOfficial 3 роки тому +5

    “It’s like he’s puking what we’re all thinking.”

    • @ZERO_O7X
      @ZERO_O7X Рік тому

      This movie looks as unappealing as that peanut butter, pickle, mustard and pineapple sandwich home boy makes. @4:00

  • @janebyrne6463
    @janebyrne6463 4 роки тому +11

    Although Vanilla Ice had his place in rap history by being the first rap artist to hit #1 on the Billboard Hot 100, I never thought he was all that as an artist. I'd rather listen to Salt n' Pepa than Vanilla Ice any day.,

  • @koenvandamme6901
    @koenvandamme6901 6 років тому +19

    Once in a while I try working "schling a schlong" into conversations to see how people react.

    • @suchiuomizu
      @suchiuomizu 5 років тому +1

      This is either going to be the biggest pork chop I ever ate, or my bulldozer.

    • @purplebec9112
      @purplebec9112 2 роки тому

      How did it go?

    • @GHC3
      @GHC3 Рік тому

      I have dpne that, i enjoy getting awkward expressions from people. I great example of how outdated slang changes over time. The last time i used it in a basic Electric woring class, the teacher said "um, i dont think it means what you think it means" 🤣

  • @Bowiebonolennon1982
    @Bowiebonolennon1982 5 років тому +18

    Can someone explain to me how the father from "Family Ties" got involved in this?

    • @koala201211
      @koala201211 4 роки тому +2

      That's what I was thinking

    • @raymonddodd9048
      @raymonddodd9048 3 роки тому +6

      This movie came out only 2 years after Family Ties ended. How does an actor go from being on a successful TV series for several years to this dumpster fire?
      Maybe he lost a bet and this was the punishment.

    • @whenfatkillsfat803
      @whenfatkillsfat803 3 роки тому

      Took a role to impress his 8 year old son and failed.

    • @choosecarefully408
      @choosecarefully408 2 роки тому +1

      As I said elsewhere: what do you imagine the demand for former TV sitcom dads _is?_ Name others who went on to bigger fame _after_ their show was off the air? Aside from Bryan Cranston, & even then, look at the _shitty_ movies he shouldn't have had to do, where do you guys get the impression that metro-sexual wuss dads were box-office draws?

  • @christopherdewilde9694
    @christopherdewilde9694 3 роки тому +4

    I've watched a lot of MST3K and Rifftracks, but this movie is a hard one to watch! I have even watched all of the MST3K version of 'Mantos - the Hands of Fate' and 'Cool as Ice' might be worse movie these guys have ever had to sit through! Props to Mike and the Boyz for this one!!! Keep up the awesome work!

    • @meumnomen
      @meumnomen 3 роки тому

      Mantos is one of the best ones they've done

  • @grimlyfiendish5579
    @grimlyfiendish5579 6 років тому +60

    I had to live through the invention of the WIGGER in the early 90's it was depressing.

    • @littlekingtrashmouth9219
      @littlekingtrashmouth9219 6 років тому +3

      Rap just created a more desperate version of it.

    • @stevenatkinson1049
      @stevenatkinson1049 5 років тому +4

      As dorky and obnoxious as the wigger was I am glad they either accepted insults or threw them back at people. Unlike todays generation who WANTS to be offended by everything.

    • @bernardlerner1913
      @bernardlerner1913 5 років тому +1

      Don't forget SNOW!!!!

    • @prixe12
      @prixe12 5 років тому +2

      @@stevenatkinson1049 Shut up Steve

    • @stevenatkinson1049
      @stevenatkinson1049 5 років тому

      @@prixe12 😂🤣😂🤣

  • @jjjjjjjjjjjjjjjj178
    @jjjjjjjjjjjjjjjj178 5 років тому +9

    I was young when this putz had his moment. You couldn't even listen to the radio in those days. It was all this douche, Wilson Phillips, Hootie and the Blowfish. Then Nevermind and Ten came out and saved us all.

  • @WindFireAllThatKindOfThing
    @WindFireAllThatKindOfThing 2 роки тому +3

    3:22 When you were hoping for Old Town Road but fate gives you the Thuggest Life this side of Cold Stone Creamery

  • @Desiremademanifest
    @Desiremademanifest 3 роки тому +4

    I am filled with utter revulsion... pineapple on a pickle-peanut butter sammich... WHO DOES THAT?!

    • @CadetGen
      @CadetGen 3 роки тому

      even the most avid stoners and hormonally charged pregnant mothers could not even fathom making something like this. And this is coming from someones mother who was both pregante with me and did a lil herb here n there, the most surreal dish she had was Pickles & Ice cream with a pint on milk on the side.

  • @geoffreysorkin5774
    @geoffreysorkin5774 6 місяців тому +1

    I love the casting in this, the older bad boy character (Vanilla Ice) is two years younger than the high school girl.

  • @classiclife7204
    @classiclife7204 3 роки тому +3

    Around 3:40, "Cheswick" from "One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest" makes an appearance. Remember? "I don't want HIS cigarettes. Or his! Or his! I want MY cigarettes!!! I want something DONE!!!!"

  • @karnerblue7658
    @karnerblue7658 6 років тому +29

    Thanks for the upload! Love these guys. They always make me laugh when times are tough.

    • @wileyschmitt
      @wileyschmitt  6 років тому +3

      I have done the same countless times, laughter is some of the best medicine :) There are two playlists with Rifftrax and MST3K edits, if you haven't seen those yet.

    • @karnerblue7658
      @karnerblue7658 6 років тому +1

      Thank you. :-)

  • @HomespunWisdom
    @HomespunWisdom 6 років тому +18

    Even with the realism and comedy overlay of the commentary.. I just... can't even...

  • @VonJost
    @VonJost 6 років тому +11

    7:24 “...but that’s what he said” “It IS?!” lol

  • @hareofsteel
    @hareofsteel 5 років тому +8

    That was decidedly fresh, Kevin.

  • @jimgoebel5348
    @jimgoebel5348 4 роки тому +2

    Easily the funniest rifftrax, and that's a difficult task!

  • @dirkbonesteel
    @dirkbonesteel 6 років тому +25

    How did they survive watching this wretched dumpster fire? Their dedication is amazing

  • @jlprizm
    @jlprizm 6 років тому +14

    Thanks for this! I needed a laugh today.

  • @LchanOtakudom
    @LchanOtakudom 5 років тому +9

    Ah, the 1990s, fun as well silly. Good times x3

  • @adamstonebridge3876
    @adamstonebridge3876 3 роки тому +3

    He's as cool as my fridge, which was scrapped in the desert years ago

  • @forshippingon34
    @forshippingon34 6 років тому +44

    “I’ll be here doing this.”
    Worst screenwriting ever...

    • @MrBlueSkyof1607
      @MrBlueSkyof1607 8 місяців тому

      That was a riff, not the actual movie.

  • @pichael4642
    @pichael4642 5 років тому +3

    They did this to your hair? No, I joined the cure. 🤣🤣🤣

  • @The_Real_Rasha
    @The_Real_Rasha Рік тому +2

    Points for the "Clown Gang from 'Akira' " ref.

  • @horaciosi
    @horaciosi 6 років тому +34

    Purple Rain this is not

  • @quinlanshirk319
    @quinlanshirk319 2 місяці тому +2

    14:39 “catchphrase or impressions of the Martians on Sesame Street”

  • @MicrowavedAlastair5390
    @MicrowavedAlastair5390 5 років тому +4

    There's not enough awesome in the world to make those pants look cool.

  • @Not_Always
    @Not_Always 10 місяців тому +1

    damn, this entire movie can be gone through in 22 minutes

  • @lezlethal
    @lezlethal 6 років тому +42

    Believe it or not, THIS review made me not like Vanilla Ice. I gave him a pass on everything else, but his "acting" is unacceptable.

    • @karnerblue7658
      @karnerblue7658 6 років тому +11

      Making a movie where he's the big hero and everyone literally stops in their tracks to admire him is unacceptable. A male Mary Sue.

    • @swiftshock2615
      @swiftshock2615 5 років тому +10

      Karner Blue Also known as the “Gary Stu”

    • @karnerblue7658
      @karnerblue7658 4 роки тому +3

      @Swift Shock Yep! 😉

  • @Lgykas
    @Lgykas 3 роки тому +3

    Love the Rifftrax version of this film. A lot of great artists were from the 1990s especially my favorite, Color Me Badd
    ♥️💛💙

  • @jondunmore4268
    @jondunmore4268 5 років тому +5

    13:49 -- "Wait a second, I look like an idiot."

  • @MutaScale
    @MutaScale 4 роки тому +3

    "As soon as you're done making sex?" ... okay, I'm not gonna lie, I actually laughed at that attempt at a joke. It caught me offguard, I'm a little ashamed, but also not regretting it either. XD