“...we often mistake love for fireworks - for drama and dysfunction. But real love is very quiet, very still. It’s boring, if seen from the perspective of high drama. Love is deep and calm - and constant.” Alex Michaelides - The Silent Patient
I love this quote! As a person goes through the ages and stages of life, physical and mental health are amplified and attenuated through the the neurological plasticity processes of growth and apoptosis. Genetics expressed through epigenetics can lead to personality disorders that fall along a spectrum of clusters that can standalone or bleed into each other. Cluster A are odd or eccentric disorders. Cluster B are emotionally dramatic or erratic disorders. Cluster C are anxious or fearful disorders. In my opinion, Cluster A personalities tend to stand out isolated from the rest of society, whereas Cluster B and Cluster C personality disorders feed off each other as chronic bullies and their helpless/hopeless victims and combine through enmeshment in socially acceptable or unacceptable dark tetrad traits.
How Paolo convinced other surgeons and those higher up that a piece of plastic would be a great idea, is what scares me about this whole story. Just horrifying.
But he did live in an awesome house,l.? Did he ever even finish medicine? It seems SO weird to think he could use a piece of plastic and add stem cells to it and it would turn into a real organ? That makes absolutely no sense…at all..
Women you have to be so careful. Don’t quit your job, don’t move to be with him and don’t leave your family, friends or support group. Take your time always.
I see so many commenting on Bonita, but no one commenting on the medical professionals that fell for his lie of plastic turning into viable skin, vessels and nerves.
I know! The Karolinska hospital in Sweden that's supposed to be top notch in the world actually stood up for him! I couldn't believe it! The whistleblowers were having their lives ruined. This world makes no sense to me. It's insanity.
How could carolinska institute believe that plastic and human tissue can human tissue ? Women have to reapply acrylic nails every two weeks !! They covered for him not only to avoid lawsuits but also the ridicule they had coming for believing such an asinine and unoriginal idea
For a married guy, he really got around with this woman. His tales were absolutely wild. You'd think she could have done more fact checking on him. Nowadays it is so easy to look up some one. It's almost de rigeur, tbh.
When you're as vapid and superficial as Benita, being able to post Facebook pics of yourself in Paris or Milan with a rich and famous surgeon supersedes all else. Fact-checking is the last thing she would want to do, because that might eventually expose truths that would force her to have to end the relationship and stop posting her wonderful life on Facebook.
He did surgeries in various countries, traveling a lot, had money, good storyteller, romantic, etc ! So, he was already above other typical surgeons! He just added more on, creating fictitious reasons, making fictional plans! She took him at his word, too much trust! He fooled his wife, for sure! Or maybe his wife suspected he had other women already! Traveling professionals can hide other lives!
Yes, I agree! Why no one told her he was married and is not to be trusted whatever he said to her!?? Esp when they announced the Wedding! The story still needs more details to understand all this!
I’ve been hoping Dr Grande to cover this story. He brought chaos and destruction to anyone who trusted him. Colleagues, patients, universities, hospitals, lovers.
Saw the documentary on netflix. This man’s dangerous conduct and callousness is alarming. Always a pleasure hearing your take on these cases. Merry Christmas🎄
How come there was no investigation into Karolinska, who employed him with 2 against and 1 vote for from 3 person comission. They gave him credentials without due process, just gave him job with no control or oversight. His bosses from Karolinska should have been charged in assistance in murder
Doc, I just want to thank you for everything this year. Through the ups and downs of my life through the year, you have been one constant. I wish you and your family nothing but the best this holiday.
He’s done the same for me this past year. I find his calm demeanour and thoughtful insight soothing. His consistency of quality output is unparalleled. I guess you can say his content was therapeutic for me. Glad to hear he’s been helpful for you too. I wish you a year filled with many, many more ups than downs 🙂
@@DrLC. I appreciate you sharing that. It truly is therapeutic. DrLC, I wish you and yours nothing but the best this holiday season. Talk care of yourself!
loved all the 's' to describe this soulless, slippery, shameless and shameful, shockingly sleazy and splashy, substantially sly and shifty so-called surgeon. Thank you, Dr. Grande for your moxy and mindful videos. 🙏🏽
I'm not a fan of the [all words starting with the same letter] thing. But I like the case stories and analysis. I've been in the True-Crime community for 30 years.
He is a monster. No doubt. The journalist is awful too. He used her ego against her. And once I heard the lies he told I somehow knew he was gonna end up telling her he was in the CIA. Bonita has a huge ego . This guy just fed that ego and promised he’d give her the dream wedding and all that. The other woman in the show I feel really bad for. He really destroyed her life.
That’s precisely what I said! She had one hell of an ego! The audacity you had to possess in order to believe the pope was going to marry you and the Clintons and Obamas would be present at your wedding 😂. There are people losing their lives to this man and you think we give af about your supposed heartbreak. What a fool.
She wasn’t even totally divorced from her 2 nd husband when she jumped into bed with Paelo. She has childhood issues and needs to be with a man . She wanted all that came along with this man .listen to her when she feel “ magically in love” by the second time she saw him. While her 9 year old daughter was grieving the recent death of her father ( husband #1) she was globe trotting with her new man instead of caring for her broken hearted daughter. The only victim her is the patients he killed and their families.
I watched a program on this story a few years back. At the end Benita Alexander asked, “Why? Why would he feel the need to do this to me?” I think he saw her as a talented journalist and foresaw her ability to uncover and expose his career misdeeds and deception. He also saw her vulnerabilities and found a way to exploit her weaknesses, manipulate her, and keep her professional reporting of him positive. Also some people get a thrill when their lies are believed. It must have felt really good to him and his lies needed to become more and more over the top.
Sometimes they do these things just to live rent free in the heads of their victims. I feel SOOOO sorry for Benita. I've experienced the heartbroken rage she exhibited. I can't believe he feels anything for those he has acquainted himself with.
I don't blame her for not seeing it sooner. I don't think Dr. Grande would have seen it sooner, in her position. It all boils down to how convincing this guy was, and it sounds like he was extremely so. The fantasy of fairy tale romance certainly played a role in her vulnerability, as it does for many. I wouldn't be surprised if she still has fond memories of much of it. He probably was able to convince himself of his own falsehoods, which would make him indistinguishable in emotion and behavior from someone who was authentic. That could be how he was able to get out of trouble so many times. It seems most of us have an instinct that makes see what is real and true as an ultimate authority that keeps us tethered to sanity. It's possible that some people are born without that or somehow turned it off.
I have never liked the phrase "better half" in regard to relationships because it implies that one person is the "worse half." That may be true, but why would anyone willingly involve himself or herself in a relationship with a worse half version of himself or herself, unless he or she is wearing the proverbial "rose-colored glasses" in regard to another? Personal and professional insight in doing an internal strengths and weaknesses and external opportunities and threats (SWOT) analyses are warranted in an ongoing manner. Therefore, insight is the precursor to one taking action steps in an expressed directional strategy (values>mission>vision) toward specific, measurable achievable, realistic, and time-bound (SMART) goals and objectives. Such aims align organizational culture, structure, function, and policy with that of public policy. Public policy financially supports infrastructure at the individual, interpersonal, and community levels (Matthew 13).
@@nanettevantriesteharder2469 Not sure what this comment follows from but I've never heard 'better half' used in the personal sense. It's always been used to describe their partner. I see it as elevating & complimenting them, whilst arguably being a little self deprecating. "My better half" yes but "I'm the better half"? That's a new one on me
@@hannahmitchell87 I know that people use the phrase "my better half" as a compliment. I like the phrase when envisioned as a Venn diagram of two partially overlapping circles in relationship with each other as a union of whole sets. My concern is that some sad, lonely, and needy people spend their lifetimes searching for that other half to complete themselves and they make unnecessarily poor to bad choices, which they often repeat, in doing so.
One lesson here is that if you are to undergo a radical surgical procedure, you might want to research the history of the procedure and the surgeon who will be performing it. Unfortunately, the world is full of incompetent doctors. I've had many different bad doctors. I don't know how one gets a history on a surgeon. I guess you would have to ask them when and where they had performed the surgery.
In the real world, if all other options have been exhausted, as in these cases, you don’t really consider whether or not to go ahead. In addition, all the info you would have been given would have pointed you to go ahead. How can a patient spot a fraud that the medical world hasn’t spotted?
This was no romantic epoch, but a thinly veiled horror story. Not only was the cad already married with children, but all of their dreamy, out of this world escapades were funded by the patients he maimed and killed. I'll take my poor, sweet, Loving fiance' over a "fairytale" any day. Have a Blessed Christmas, everyone. ❤
@@megalopolis2015I believe that with him, it was difficult to separate fact from fiction! He was already not an ordinary surgeon! He did have many connections, knew important people! Traveling a lot for work and pleasure! Worldly, multi-lingual, sophisticated, charismatic, charming, romantic, smooth-tongued, gift of the gab, etc etc! She was swept off her feet! I’m more curious what did his wife knew or believed he was doing! Lots can be hidden when one travels for work and have periods of absences!
@@PHlopheYou can prove this status thing?? She is the Producer of a major media, so not a small fish either! I believe she was swept off her feet! He love-bombed her, was a conman! Charmers can be very smooth!
7:48 As a retired military physician, I can affirm that military physicians are never snipers. We are only allowed to shoot when required to do so to protect ourselves and our patients, when we are under immediate attack. Just saying.
I had done a deep dive into this and watched Benita do very long interviews with every little detail and let me say, I consider myself to be intelligent and not easy to trick, but I’m pretty sure I would have fallen for this dude. He was unbelievably good at conning people.
In my experience, developing romantic feelings for someone - or even just simple physical attraction to someone - tends to impede purely rational thought. We are much more likely to ignore warning signs and view our partner's conduct in the most positive light possible. Being "in love" amplifies that phenomena tenfold. Which makes it easy for even smart, skeptical people to get involved with bad people...
While watching the documentary, I wanted to scream at Bonita "How can you be so gullible?" This guy was clearly a liar, cheat and should have been jailed forever for his crimes. I hope the families of the victims filed multiple lawsuits.
I wonder if at least some of her 'gullibility' was actually driven by narcissism. Bonita believed she was entitled to a fairytale prince, so she didn't question things that a more grounded person would have. He clearly love-bombed her, but she also clearly felt she deserved the attention (despite protesting this she continued to accept the trips, the gifts, the attention, even knowing something was off). She is a full-grown woman who gushed like a teenager over her lover's superior qualities to all of her friends. She wanted people to know that SHE had been chosen by this superman. Let's not forget that she willingly lied on his behalf when the truth about him became inconvenient for her. She seemed to be more angry that he had cheated on her and made her look like a fool than she was that he is essentially a serial killer. The whole thing was distasteful and her efforts to avenge herself after things fell apart, which was years ago and yet she's still focused on it, seem a bit like narcissistic rage. Because the real story of Paolo Macchiarini began long before Bonita even entered the picture, framing the documentary through the lens of her story and their romance, kind of irritated me. Of all the personal tragedies experienced by people who came into contact with this man, hers is arguably the least tragic. Her heart was broken and he devasted her emotionally, but she is still alive. Many others were not so lucky. The focus on their sophomoric Hallmark movie romance didn't leave enough room for the real story about how someone like Macchiarini can get away with harming so many people because of public acclaim, how a major academic center like the Karolinska Inst can become willingly complicit (and still are to this day) in horrendous human rights abuses when fame is involved, how the Hippocratic oath means nothing when the deaths of 'unimportant' people become acceptable collateral damage in the quest for fame and power, how whistleblowers have nowhere to turn when the powerful won't listen, and how a system designed to self-police via rigorous multiple level peer-review processes could fail so spectacularly--all of which began long before Bonita was around. The documentary barely scratched the surface of these critical issues. It was largely about Bonita, but she is ultimately just a bit player in the real and more important story. I am sure her emotional turmoil was extreme. Unlike the people Macchariani killed, however, she had the benefit of seeing abundant red flags that she simply chose to ignore. His other victims got no warning and had no way of knowing he was sacrificing them to his ego. None of them got their own documentary.
@@Sleepparalysisdemon2 Come on now, "He was backed by an entire institute. The most respected in their field. They couldn't see his lies or fraud," It's obvious to almost everyone that it was their reputation they were protecting. As for her, I mean she supposedly is in the top profession at sniffing out bullshit. So what were her motives here? Was she the "dumb blond" who dyed her hair brunette and thus fooled everybody into believing she was a top-notch investigative journalist or was she a gossip hack, conned by what she originally thought was going to be her "mark"?
She wasn’t as “gullible” as she knew she might have to fake. She most likely knew there was a high chance of fraud, but continued to gamble with the idea of money and glamour knowing the cushion of being an innocent and confused woman would still be there when it inevitably unraveled.
They both had big egos, and the money he spent on her was very convincing. I feel for all the people who suffered and died under his care. God bless them. 😪🥀
Don't blame the victim. We all have a part in what happens to us, but in the end dealing with someone who lies, manipulates, and lacks empathy may have you act in unrecognizable ways. If you ever found yourself dealing with someone like that, I'm sorry and I hope you're rid of them. These people are deeply disturbed and there's nothing to be done about it. We definitely need to continue to spread the word about narcissism.
Finally a voice of reason on this comment thread.👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽 Amazing how much blame there is on Benita here when he fooled top doctors in a world renowned hospital! Dr. Grande missed the mark on this one.
I am so glad you covered this story. There is no doubt what happened to Bonita was terrible. However, I agree with you that the 1st mistake made was her crossing the line of her employer's policy and became personally involved with a client. From what I have read and viewed about this story is there were many signs during the relationship that were suspect. And if she had had a clearer understanding of the stakes involved, she would have been hesitate to some degree and question his motives. Like the saying goes "if it is too good to be true, it is probably is not. true" I agree with you, she made herself believe in him and the relationship when she should have been more on guard. She threw caution to the wind, and just dived into their relationship with blinders on. All new, long distance relationships do not indicate their true compatibility until they start sharing their day to day lives together. Bonita has several pod casts she does, and after watching a few of them, she comes across as a "scorned lover." She needs to take a look at herself and what role she played in making this terrible experience in her life.
I hope that dude is in jail and divorced. As for the journalist, the fact that she got involved, did no background check or Anything to check this guy out just astounds me. Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to all!🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁☃️☃️☃️☃️☃️❄️❄️❄️❄️⛄️⛄️⛄️⛄️🎅🎅🎅🎅🥳👍👍❤️
Very well said! The ink wasn’t even dry on the second divorce when she started sleeping with Paelo. I’d really like to hear his take on things but he has never publicly spoken about her unlike her who has done nothing but now making a living on being a conman expert. She should have put her 9 year old daughter first, she was grieving the loss of her father and where was her mother? Globe trotting to Venice with her new boyfriend. Who brings a man into the house to stay when you have a 9 year old daughter who just lost her father? She did. ..the red flags are so blinding here but she didn’t want to know the truth about him. Most woman would be getting insurance on a ring that cost $100,000 but not her. And she said she threw it in the river. Bull. She has kept every email, pictures, videos of this man and this relationship was over YEARS ago. She’s traveled to Sweden to his court cases. And now doing podcasts and has been on every tv talk show moaning about being this victim to her “ George Clooney look alike” , the only victims here are the patients he killed and their families . Hospitals covered up his crimes even when they found out he lied about his credentials and his research or lack of it….
@@supremlyfoxylass Yes, we do not hear from Paelo. If you notice in her videos, she always has a bottle of champagne or a bottle of wine near by. When she was with Paelo, the same thing. Perhaps she needs to address her alcohol problem? Over consumption of alcohol brings problems into people's lives, as well as an entire slew of unidentified issues and problems.
@@Sleepparalysisdemon2 I assume she was referring to both parties in this highly dysfunctional, unethical, conflict of interest-ridden, and co-dependent relationship.
@@nanettevantriesteharder2469Nobody even mentions the fact that he was already married and had two children. This alone would make him morally & ethically unacceptable, without even considering the rest of his lies. What must his nice Italian wife have been thinking of all his 'comings & goings'??? Benita is obviously the evil 'other woman', and she deserved everything she got. Who believes all that 'glamour' nonsense without pausing to 'take stock'?? What a complete airhead and self-centred fool.
Poor patients. No animal data and goes directly into humans? That’s criminal. No IRB approval? What a con man……destroying everything he touches. I assume he has lost his medical license but should be in jail for several decades. Beware of very charming people…. Not everything that shines is gold…
Hi Dr Grande. Always love your videos. Please do a case on Christopher Dunstch (Dr Death) and also Lou Pearlman. I feel both cases deserve to be known towards wider range of audience.
Bonita was married to another newscaster, John Noel (RIP). They had a daughter and lived across the street from me in Brooklyn. She moved when they separated and he passed away unfortunately of cancer. Very nice man.
Another excellent video, Dr. Grande. Another title for it might be "The Lies We Choose to Believe," which would be personally and professionally problematic for surgeons and journalists. I know the answer to Benita's question about how she could get married in Italy. There are three types of marriages in Italy: a) internationally recognized traditional Roman Catholic marriage, b) internationally recognized civil marriage, and c) a fake Roman Catholic marriage ceremony for the tourism industry that looks real but is not officially recognized anywhere in the world. Real Roman Catholic marriage is between a man and a woman who are Roman Catholics, either by birth or through conversion to the faith, so as to be eligible to go through the seven sacraments of the Church. Neither of the two people can have been married before. If this type of marriage is conducted under the auspices of the Church, but it was never consummated or the original basis for such a marriage was fraudulent, it can be officially annulled without undergoing a divorce, so as to allow either or both parties to remarry a "first" time again. Even if a divorce has taken place, a dispensation from the Church for a fraudulent marriage allows the former couple to remarry, again as if the initial marriage had never taken place. Unfortunately, this particular situation makes any previously legitimate children born into the annulled marriage and/or previously unknown marriages illegitimate in retrospect.
I agree, the victim oftentimes in this sort of circumstance is somewhat culpable. They want to believe the ridiculousness of their so-called fairytale.
An investigative journalist that had no knowledge he was married 😮 red flags 🚩 all over this situation. It should have been obvious he had serious issues that she needed to address before becoming involved with him.
I was laughing while listening to all the celebrities he drop-named. I loved that “Bill wanted him to check Hillary out”. 😂 Ridiculous that anyone fell for his absurd lies and very suspicious behavior.
How could a woman like Benita believe that he was actually 'checking out' someone like Hilary Clinton's health when he just wasn't there to spend New Year with her? The obvious answer would be that he was spending it with 'the wife & kids'!. How totally and absurdly gullible this woman was!
At first I was a bit skeptical, but after watching several episodes of your channel, you provide perhaps the most compelling and relevant analysis of these often strange criminal events.
Chronic lier & narcissist marries gullible gold digger. That list made me laugh 😂 Those poor patients, had no idea tracheas could be transplated. Great analysis again. Thanks Dr G😊💚💚
You're calling Benita a gold digger? She was an NBC producer and had a great amount of wealth on her own. Many people fall in love with others who claim they are not who they say they are. She was just in the spotlight.
@@Sleepparalysisdemon2 He was older & not that attractive. Am sure his wealth played into her fantasy attraction. Any logical person wouldn't fall for his continual stories. She liked the high life whether she had her own $ or not. She always wore tons of makeup, dressed fancy, had her 💅 done. That's a woman looking to marry rich.
@zenawarrior7442 There is nothing wrong with someone having their shit together. There is nothing wrong with her wearing make-up, getting her hair done, and wearing clothes that you can't afford. Just because her life is different than yours, obviously... There's nothing wrong with that. That doesn't mean she was a gold digger. He was an extremely well-respected physician at the time, and had an entire institute that backed him. There was no reason for her not to believe he was who he claimed
Good grief, this character is the living embodiment of the old joke 'how do you know he's lying? His lips are moving'. Happy holidays to you and yours Dr. G!
Love this channel love you Dr. Grande- sat at my dinner table with my family listening to you last night- my partner was like wow this guy is great! He should be on tv! Keep up the great work and thank you!
Dr. Grande - I saw the 20/20 version of this con artist several years ago. It was unnerving and frustrating to watch. Thanks so much for your excellent analysis. 🎄💜👍
She didn't seem to care at all either that he wasn't a good person and caused terrible suffering. Her standards were zilch as long as she had nice stuff.
I have no sympathy for Benita Alexander. The moment her relationship with the doctor became romantic, she had a duty to withdraw from producing the documentary. She didn't do that, and went on to complete the documentary, which was overwhelmingly supportive of the doctor. The documentary - effectively a puff piece - could have induced additional patients to accept treatment from this monster. Unacceptable conduct.
Hi Dr Grande. First of all, thank you for the insightful analysis. Love your videos. I just read this case. Very horrific. This case reminds me of Dr death - Christopher Dunstch's case, where he also maimed patients. Please do a case on Dr Death - Christopher Dunstch, and also please do a case on Lou Pearlman. Both of these cases are very interesting and deserved to be known by wider audience, Thank you
'Secret society of Physicians'. Its hard enough to get a group of surgeons to agree on the music they play in the OR. Imagine trying to get them to agree on a constitution for a 'society'. 'Sniper' had me rolling.
Benita was dazzled by all the adventures and experiences that Paolo's money could wow her with. So much of what he said really sounded fantastical and not realistic. Infatuation causes people to be in denial.
She even admitted that early on in their romance she witnessed him exaggerate the truth while talking to someone. That should have set off alarm bells. Also she didn't find it weird that their first date was an over the top romantic and extravagant trip to Venice yet he proposed to her by merely handing her a box in her house? The love bombing phase was slowing down. Another red flag
I am always entertained by your word smithing. General surgeons are on the top ten list of professions which have more than 2 per 100 with traits of psychopathy, sociopathy, machiavellianism. They are often big liars. I don’t know who developed the top ten list.
Reminds me of Louise Fischer, a Danish journalist who reported on a swinger's club and joined in the fun while live on radio. Both she and Bonita got screwed.
@@tarstarkusz While some journalists are horrible, non-critical thinkers, look for drama, don't see the big picture, and are unethical, there are also good journalists who are brave, ethical, and have done a lot of good and have held people to account. Some good journalists have lost their lives through their work.
So after the wedding fell through, Benita and her friends still went to Italy and Spain as planned. They filmed Paolo, 'his wife' and small children outside their home. He had apparently married an Italian woman many years earlier and had 2 (grown) children. It sounds like he had multiple relationships going on at the same time and had never divorced.
A female journalist proving the world we can’t do our jobs because we prioritise having a husband than doing our jobs right. At that age and with that amount of experience she didn’t know what love bombarding* was? She was there for the money and prestige. Just 5min into the documentary and she says “I never loved the camera,” my face was like “bitch please.” I didn’t need to watch the whole thing (though I did) to know she was no victim. As a journalist, if I get the slightest rumour that this man is actually killing his patients instead of extending and bettering their quality of life I’d start doing my own research. Not when the castle’s staff members tell me my “Vatican” wedding doesn’t exist. Besides she barely names the victims. She’s constantly going on about her wedding and how betrayed she felt, when what matters here is what he did to all these people. Of the women he dated, the only victim is the Brazilian woman who had a daughter with him as she was one of his martyrs.
To be fair though this is all clear in front of us snd the programme heavily edited / we have all done stupid things that we look back on with 20-20 hindsight & say “what was I thinking”?
@@ThePossumone she was a full grown experienced woman with a daughter. All I can say is that she was extremely naive, unprofessional and even complicit.
@@SLa-pb1gg yes, the woman who’s son died and he instantly started calling her to seduce her. How more vulnerable a person can be? He did that in different ways with his other patients and their families. The mother of the Russian girl noticed it too.
I saw this before, but didn't realize she was with NBC, the things people do for love😅 unbelievable that he went to prison only 2 and a half years, there are people in prison with a lot longer centence for driving with a suspended license 😮
Scary when doctors play the part of a mad scientist. Now they are talking about womb transplants so that biological men can have babies. Great analysis as usual Dr. Grande. Loved starting my day with this video
There are doctors who are very greedy and are willing to forgo safety in order to collect a paycheck. Phalloplasty is an example of a procedure that can have disastrous consequences. There are People who have been reduced to using a catheter after undergoing one. It is extremely involved and surgeons who are not extremely skilled microsurgeons still attempt this surgery in order to get money.
@isocarboxazid I brought up surgeons not people who identify as transgender individuals. Procedures like a phalloplasty and womb transplants concern me. I have data to back up my concerns. Feel free to read my comment below. I have done research. A comments section is not the place for explaining all of it but I did expand on my comment a little.
oh my gosh, i remember this case! when i was young i googled my name and one of dr macchiarini’s patients had the same name as me; i did not know that she passed away in 2013.
Hi Dr. Grande, good morning from Southern California. Excellent analysis. I too fell for a Con-man. Gave him $90grand of my money I inherited. Lesson learned. As always I learn something new from your videos.
"A Clear Violation of ...Boundaries"- So What's New? 🤓 In this thoroughly enjoyable "take-down" of a respected surgeon we see how over-the-top so many people can be. Such individuals seem to find life as most of us know it is far "too ordinary" for themselves and they seek to find a "bigger life" and a more "you can't believe it" type of life. What evidence is there that Paolo was a victim of this type of exaggerated form of conduct: (1) To be a surgeon is something few people can claim to be. At the same time, few people can claim to live on seashells on Robinson Crusoe Island off the coast of Chile. (2) To be a surgeon involves "life and death" types of situations and "very small people" think this is a "very big deal." (3) Conceptions of the properly "romantic" is another way in which things go "off the rails." There is really nothing "magical" about Venice except the level of pollution. But, once again, "very small people" think this place is somehow "magical." What's incredible is how people live there at all. (4) Paolo's infatuation with larger characters- losers like Clinton and Obama- reminds me of the German born killer Christian Gerhartsreiter who claimed to have a direct line to George Bush))) (5) Paolo's "very small" mind was impressed by the thought of "organized assassins." It's a major "power trip" to kill someone from a distance where the victim can't see their killer. I guess Paolo is offended by the fact that he is mortal. "Most of us" have no need to rattle that chain. Let's all hope that the James Bond character disappears forever. It had a powerful hold on a specific generation of people. We've all be "shaken" enough to stop "stirring" that drink. Thank you.
“...we often mistake love for fireworks - for drama and dysfunction. But real love is very quiet, very still. It’s boring, if seen from the perspective of high drama. Love is deep and calm - and constant.”
Alex Michaelides - The Silent Patient
I love this quote! As a person goes through the ages and stages of life, physical and mental health are amplified and attenuated through the the neurological plasticity processes of growth and apoptosis. Genetics expressed through epigenetics can lead to personality disorders that fall along a spectrum of clusters that can standalone or bleed into each other. Cluster A are odd or eccentric disorders. Cluster B are emotionally dramatic or erratic disorders. Cluster C are anxious or fearful disorders. In my opinion, Cluster A personalities tend to stand out isolated from the rest of society, whereas Cluster B and Cluster C personality disorders feed off each other as chronic bullies and their helpless/hopeless victims and combine through enmeshment in socially acceptable or unacceptable dark tetrad traits.
Well said brother
I feel we all have to be book smart, street smart, and spiritually smart. We all are lights, we have power of good, no matter what job we do.
U know how many woman just Creamed in there pants just now, after reading your comment???
That is an Excellent description of the word LOVE...!
How Paolo convinced other surgeons and those higher up that a piece of plastic would be a great idea, is what scares me about this whole story. Just horrifying.
These poor "patients" died awful, lingering deaths where they suffocated while Paolo celebrated! SICK!!
The truth is those people are not that bright either.
A quote from Coffeehouse Crime - 'When you're wearing rose colored glasses, red flags just look like flags.'
Good one. Was it related to this case?
@@sy_dianne5224no and I think it’s originally from Bojack Horseman
I like that line!😂😂😂👍👏👏
So very true
@@sy_dianne5224 No, it wasn't
LOL that he had to be a sniper too. It’s like the lies of a ten-year-old.
But he did live in an awesome house,l.? Did he ever even finish medicine? It seems SO weird to think he could use a piece of plastic and add stem cells to it and it would turn into a real organ? That makes absolutely no sense…at all..
Women you have to be so careful. Don’t quit your job, don’t move to be with him and don’t leave your family, friends or support group. Take your time always.
Know a man through all the seasons. There is no rush.
You would have to be real stupid to go for this CHUMP! 😂
This guy was one out of the box. He was an extremely excellent conman. He was believable.
I would have believed everything until the Pope thing. Then I would have called BS on Paulo. Which basically Benita and her friends did.
I see so many commenting on Bonita, but no one commenting on the medical professionals that fell for his lie of plastic turning into viable skin, vessels and nerves.
He was clearly an excellent conman. No wonder she fell for his lies when doctors fell for his medical lies
misogyny. and women are the worst misogynists out there.
The hospitals he worked at were culpable.
I know! The Karolinska hospital in Sweden that's supposed to be top notch in the world actually stood up for him! I couldn't believe it! The whistleblowers were having their lives ruined. This world makes no sense to me. It's insanity.
Right?! She was a victim too. We all want to believe in love.
I saw this unfold in real time in Swedish media, and the absolutely worst part was the way the hospital stuck up for and covered for this charlatan.
😢
The hospitals were afraid people could sue them
@@helenvarner5787Sweden is not USA. You just can't sue a hospital for 5 million usd in Sweden.
How could carolinska institute believe that plastic and human tissue can human tissue ? Women have to reapply acrylic nails every two weeks !! They covered for him not only to avoid lawsuits but also the ridicule they had coming for believing such an asinine and unoriginal idea
@@cgitahiSilicone is used commonly in surgery. This guy though, awful, a regular Dr. Mengele
A masterclass in classic narcissism: grandiosity, lying, love-bombing. Chilling.
For a married guy, he really got around with this woman. His tales were absolutely wild. You'd think she could have done more fact checking on him. Nowadays it is so easy to look up some one. It's almost de rigeur, tbh.
She was about status
She had enough status of her own. She was just infaruated. @@IceWhiteice22
When you're as vapid and superficial as Benita, being able to post Facebook pics of yourself in Paris or Milan with a rich and famous surgeon supersedes all else. Fact-checking is the last thing she would want to do, because that might eventually expose truths that would force her to have to end the relationship and stop posting her wonderful life on Facebook.
He did surgeries in various countries, traveling a lot, had money, good storyteller, romantic, etc ! So, he was already above other typical surgeons! He just added more on, creating fictitious reasons, making fictional plans! She took him at his word, too much trust! He fooled his wife, for sure! Or maybe his wife suspected he had other women already!
Traveling professionals can hide other lives!
Yes, I agree! Why no one told her he was married and is not to be trusted whatever he said to her!?? Esp when they announced the Wedding!
The story still needs more details to understand all this!
I’ve been hoping Dr Grande to cover this story. He brought chaos and destruction to anyone who trusted him. Colleagues, patients, universities, hospitals, lovers.
Reminds me of the Dr. Death story from here in the US. Dr. Christopher Duntsch. I believe his docu is on Netflix as well.
This is the problem with dark tetrad personalities being placed in positions of leadership.
Saw the documentary on netflix. This man’s dangerous conduct and callousness is alarming.
Always a pleasure hearing your take on these cases.
Merry Christmas🎄
I’ll never understand how Karolinska institutet could think that dousing plastic with stem cells could magically make organs.
How come there was no investigation into Karolinska, who employed him with 2 against and 1 vote for from 3 person comission. They gave him credentials without due process, just gave him job with no control or oversight. His bosses from Karolinska should have been charged in assistance in murder
Doc, I just want to thank you for everything this year. Through the ups and downs of my life through the year, you have been one constant. I wish you and your family nothing but the best this holiday.
He’s done the same for me this past year. I find his calm demeanour and thoughtful insight soothing. His consistency of quality output is unparalleled. I guess you can say his content was therapeutic for me. Glad to hear he’s been helpful for you too. I wish you a year filled with many, many more ups than downs 🙂
Excellent video 📹
EX-DOCTOR PLAYBOY 🎉
@@DrLC. I appreciate you sharing that. It truly is therapeutic. DrLC, I wish you and yours nothing but the best this holiday season. Talk care of yourself!
This is awesome. I find listening to Dr Grande, therapeutic.
Wishing you an amazing new year. One with peace, love and everything good.
@raegemini I'm glad I'm not alone. Have a great day, my friend, and all the best next year.
loved all the 's' to describe this soulless, slippery, shameless and shameful, shockingly sleazy and splashy, substantially sly and shifty so-called surgeon. Thank you, Dr. Grande for your moxy and mindful videos. 🙏🏽
I'm not a fan of the [all words starting with the same letter] thing. But I like the case stories and analysis. I've been in the True-Crime community for 30 years.
@@rullvox5912the same letter nonsense is where I disconnect from the story-very unprofessionally stupid.
@@rullvox5912alliteration
@@dbh7670everyone may have their quirks😂
The wedding being in a castle is the only non-suspicious thing. I’ve been to two weddings in castles.
Agreed. Having lived in Europe for a long time, weddings in castles are fairly commonplace there.
But pope? Come on
EXCEPT Catholics get married in churches. . .
@@NieceyWeesey They said the castle is the ONLY non-suspicious thing.
@@NieceyWeeseywithout annulments and marriage prep ?
Ladies, you have a gut feeling for a reason. Listen to it!!!
Yes, their gut says go for the wallets , and if the guts wrong fall back onto being a victim..
He is a monster. No doubt. The journalist is awful too. He used her ego against her.
And once I heard the lies he told I somehow knew he was gonna end up telling her he was in the CIA. Bonita has a huge ego . This guy just fed that ego and promised he’d give her the dream wedding and all that.
The other woman in the show I feel really bad for. He really destroyed her life.
Yeah, I agree. I don't feel for her at all. She's not a good person and happened to meet and like a monster.
Where are you guys getting her ego from? I didn't notice that
That’s precisely what I said! She had one hell of an ego! The audacity you had to possess in order to believe the pope was going to marry you and the Clintons and Obamas would be present at your wedding 😂. There are people losing their lives to this man and you think we give af about your supposed heartbreak. What a fool.
She wasn’t even totally divorced from her 2 nd husband when she jumped into bed with Paelo. She has childhood issues and needs to be with a man . She wanted all that came along with this man .listen to her when she feel “ magically in love” by the second time she saw him. While her 9 year old daughter was grieving the recent death of her father ( husband #1) she was globe trotting with her new man instead of caring for her broken hearted daughter. The only victim her is the patients he killed and their families.
@@supremlyfoxylass that's a bunch of assumptions on your part
When a narcissist meets a psychopath
I watched a program on this story a few years back. At the end Benita Alexander asked, “Why? Why would he feel the need to do this to me?” I think he saw her as a talented journalist and foresaw her ability to uncover and expose his career misdeeds and deception. He also saw her vulnerabilities and found a way to exploit her weaknesses, manipulate her, and keep her professional reporting of him positive. Also some people get a thrill when their lies are believed. It must have felt really good to him and his lies needed to become more and more over the top.
Sometimes they do these things just to live rent free in the heads of their victims. I feel SOOOO sorry for Benita. I've experienced the heartbroken rage she exhibited. I can't believe he feels anything for those he has acquainted himself with.
I don't blame her for not seeing it sooner. I don't think Dr. Grande would have seen it sooner, in her position. It all boils down to how convincing this guy was, and it sounds like he was extremely so. The fantasy of fairy tale romance certainly played a role in her vulnerability, as it does for many. I wouldn't be surprised if she still has fond memories of much of it. He probably was able to convince himself of his own falsehoods, which would make him indistinguishable in emotion and behavior from someone who was authentic. That could be how he was able to get out of trouble so many times. It seems most of us have an instinct that makes see what is real and true as an ultimate authority that keeps us tethered to sanity. It's possible that some people are born without that or somehow turned it off.
I have never liked the phrase "better half" in regard to relationships because it implies that one person is the "worse half." That may be true, but why would anyone willingly involve himself or herself in a relationship with a worse half version of himself or herself, unless he or she is wearing the proverbial "rose-colored glasses" in regard to another? Personal and professional insight in doing an internal strengths and weaknesses and external opportunities and threats (SWOT) analyses are warranted in an ongoing manner. Therefore, insight is the precursor to one taking action steps in an expressed directional strategy (values>mission>vision) toward specific, measurable achievable, realistic, and time-bound (SMART) goals and objectives. Such aims align organizational culture, structure, function, and policy with that of public policy. Public policy financially supports infrastructure at the individual, interpersonal, and community levels (Matthew 13).
@@nanettevantriesteharder2469 Not sure what this comment follows from but I've never heard 'better half' used in the personal sense. It's always been used to describe their partner. I see it as elevating & complimenting them, whilst arguably being a little self deprecating. "My better half" yes but "I'm the better half"? That's a new one on me
@@hannahmitchell87 I know that people use the phrase "my better half" as a compliment. I like the phrase when envisioned as a Venn diagram of two partially overlapping circles in relationship with each other as a union of whole sets. My concern is that some sad, lonely, and needy people spend their lifetimes searching for that other half to complete themselves and they make unnecessarily poor to bad choices, which they often repeat, in doing so.
One lesson here is that if you are to undergo a radical surgical procedure, you might want to research the history of the procedure and the surgeon who will be performing it. Unfortunately, the world is full of incompetent doctors. I've had many different bad doctors. I don't know how one gets a history on a surgeon. I guess you would have to ask them when and where they had performed the surgery.
In the real world, if all other options have been exhausted, as in these cases, you don’t really consider whether or not to go ahead. In addition, all the info you would have been given would have pointed you to go ahead. How can a patient spot a fraud that the medical world hasn’t spotted?
This was no romantic epoch, but a thinly veiled horror story. Not only was the cad already married with children, but all of their dreamy, out of this world escapades were funded by the patients he maimed and killed. I'll take my poor, sweet, Loving fiance' over a "fairytale" any day. Have a Blessed Christmas, everyone. ❤
Homegirl was all about status. I find it hard to believe she did not see the red flags.
@@PHlophe I think she did, at least in a gut sense, but, like so many people, dismissed them.
@@megalopolis2015I believe that with him, it was difficult to separate fact from fiction! He was already not an ordinary surgeon! He did have many connections, knew important people! Traveling a lot for work and pleasure! Worldly, multi-lingual, sophisticated, charismatic, charming, romantic, smooth-tongued, gift of the gab, etc etc! She was swept off her feet!
I’m more curious what did his wife knew or believed he was doing! Lots can be hidden when one travels for work and have periods of absences!
@@PHlopheYou can prove this status thing?? She is the Producer of a major media, so not a small fish either! I believe she was swept off her feet! He love-bombed her, was a conman! Charmers can be very smooth!
7:48 As a retired military physician, I can affirm that military physicians are never snipers. We are only allowed to shoot when required to do so to protect ourselves and our patients, when we are under immediate attack.
Just saying.
Obama must have found a way to make an exception for him, but only for him! 😂😂😂
Thanks, dude. Props.
I had done a deep dive into this and watched Benita do very long interviews with every little detail and let me say, I consider myself to be intelligent and not easy to trick, but I’m pretty sure I would have fallen for this dude. He was unbelievably good at conning people.
People are good at blaming the victims, but a con artist is just that! They can trick anyone
In my experience, developing romantic feelings for someone - or even just simple physical attraction to someone - tends to impede purely rational thought. We are much more likely to ignore warning signs and view our partner's conduct in the most positive light possible. Being "in love" amplifies that phenomena tenfold. Which makes it easy for even smart, skeptical people to get involved with bad people...
And how old re you?
@@mgw9562 Old enough to know better!
You’re a typical woman
This story is truly unbelievable. His lack of insight was disturbing to say the least.
Thank you, Dr. Grande.❤
Rejane: Merry Christmas to you and yours!
A dangerous man
While watching the documentary, I wanted to scream at Bonita "How can you be so gullible?" This guy was clearly a liar, cheat and should have been jailed forever for his crimes. I hope the families of the victims filed multiple lawsuits.
I wonder if at least some of her 'gullibility' was actually driven by narcissism. Bonita believed she was entitled to a fairytale prince, so she didn't question things that a more grounded person would have. He clearly love-bombed her, but she also clearly felt she deserved the attention (despite protesting this she continued to accept the trips, the gifts, the attention, even knowing something was off). She is a full-grown woman who gushed like a teenager over her lover's superior qualities to all of her friends. She wanted people to know that SHE had been chosen by this superman. Let's not forget that she willingly lied on his behalf when the truth about him became inconvenient for her. She seemed to be more angry that he had cheated on her and made her look like a fool than she was that he is essentially a serial killer. The whole thing was distasteful and her efforts to avenge herself after things fell apart, which was years ago and yet she's still focused on it, seem a bit like narcissistic rage.
Because the real story of Paolo Macchiarini began long before Bonita even entered the picture, framing the documentary through the lens of her story and their romance, kind of irritated me. Of all the personal tragedies experienced by people who came into contact with this man, hers is arguably the least tragic. Her heart was broken and he devasted her emotionally, but she is still alive. Many others were not so lucky. The focus on their sophomoric Hallmark movie romance didn't leave enough room for the real story about how someone like Macchiarini can get away with harming so many people because of public acclaim, how a major academic center like the Karolinska Inst can become willingly complicit (and still are to this day) in horrendous human rights abuses when fame is involved, how the Hippocratic oath means nothing when the deaths of 'unimportant' people become acceptable collateral damage in the quest for fame and power, how whistleblowers have nowhere to turn when the powerful won't listen, and how a system designed to self-police via rigorous multiple level peer-review processes could fail so spectacularly--all of which began long before Bonita was around. The documentary barely scratched the surface of these critical issues. It was largely about Bonita, but she is ultimately just a bit player in the real and more important story.
I am sure her emotional turmoil was extreme. Unlike the people Macchariani killed, however, she had the benefit of seeing abundant red flags that she simply chose to ignore. His other victims got no warning and had no way of knowing he was sacrificing them to his ego. None of them got their own documentary.
@@Sleepparalysisdemon2 Come on now, "He was backed by an entire institute. The most respected in their field. They couldn't see his lies or fraud," It's obvious to almost everyone that it was their reputation they were protecting.
As for her, I mean she supposedly is in the top profession at sniffing out bullshit.
So what were her motives here?
Was she the "dumb blond" who dyed her hair brunette and thus fooled everybody into believing she was a top-notch investigative journalist or was she a gossip hack, conned by what she originally thought was going to be her "mark"?
@@TeaandTacos77 I fully agree with what you wrote.
She wasn’t as “gullible” as she knew she might have to fake. She most likely knew there was a high chance of fraud, but continued to gamble with the idea of money and glamour knowing the cushion of being an innocent and confused woman would still be there when it inevitably unraveled.
@@Sleepparalysisdemon2She is an idiot. That isn't victim blaming.
Bonita seems like she has an extreme sense of entitlement. She had blinders on seeking the good life she thought she deserved.
meanwhile, this MAN was fraudulently inserting deadly body parts inside of people's bodies. Jesus Christ you guys. wtf is wrong with you?
She's a noxious, vapid airhead.
This is projection
She's definitely a golddigger
They both had big egos, and the money he spent on her was very convincing. I feel for all the people who suffered and died under his care. God bless them. 😪🥀
I feel sick and sad, imagine the hope and faith his patients had prior to those surgeries. 😢
Don't blame the victim. We all have a part in what happens to us, but in the end dealing with someone who lies, manipulates, and lacks empathy may have you act in unrecognizable ways. If you ever found yourself dealing with someone like that, I'm sorry and I hope you're rid of them. These people are deeply disturbed and there's nothing to be done about it. We definitely need to continue to spread the word about narcissism.
@borsalinokizaru9862 she did take accountability. You're just an ass.
Finally a voice of reason on this comment thread.👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽 Amazing how much blame there is on Benita here when he fooled top doctors in a world renowned hospital!
Dr. Grande missed the mark on this one.
I am so glad you covered this story. There is no doubt what happened to Bonita was terrible. However, I agree with you that the 1st mistake made was her crossing the line of her employer's policy and became personally involved with a client. From what I have read and viewed about this story is there were many signs during the relationship that were suspect. And if she had had a clearer understanding of the stakes involved, she would have been hesitate to some degree and question his motives. Like the saying goes "if it is too good to be true, it is probably is not. true" I agree with you, she made herself believe in him and the relationship when she should have been more on guard. She threw caution to the wind, and just dived into their relationship with blinders on. All new, long distance relationships do not indicate their true compatibility until they start sharing their day to day lives together. Bonita has several pod casts she does, and after watching a few of them, she comes across as a "scorned lover." She needs to take a look at herself and what role she played in making this terrible experience in her life.
I hope that dude is in jail and divorced. As for the journalist, the fact that she got involved, did no background check or Anything to check this guy out just astounds me. Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to all!🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁☃️☃️☃️☃️☃️❄️❄️❄️❄️⛄️⛄️⛄️⛄️🎅🎅🎅🎅🥳👍👍❤️
ok, self-hater. you said the word "SHE" a billion times, meanwhile this MAN was inserting deadly body parts into innocent people's bodies. 🤦🤦🤦
Very well said! The ink wasn’t even dry on the second divorce when she started sleeping with Paelo. I’d really like to hear his take on things but he has never publicly spoken about her unlike her who has done nothing but now making a living on being a conman expert. She should have put her 9 year old daughter first, she was grieving the loss of her father and where was her mother? Globe trotting to Venice with her new boyfriend. Who brings a man into the house to stay when you have a 9 year old daughter who just lost her father? She did. ..the red flags are so blinding here but she didn’t want to know the truth about him. Most woman would be getting insurance on a ring that cost $100,000 but not her. And she said she threw it in the river. Bull. She has kept every email, pictures, videos of this man and this relationship was over YEARS ago. She’s traveled to Sweden to his court cases. And now doing podcasts and has been on every tv talk show moaning about being this victim to her “ George Clooney look alike” , the only victims here are the patients he killed and their families . Hospitals covered up his crimes even when they found out he lied about his credentials and his research or lack of it….
@@supremlyfoxylass Yes, we do not hear from Paelo. If you notice in her videos, she always has a bottle of champagne or a bottle of wine near by. When she was with Paelo, the same thing. Perhaps she needs to address her alcohol problem? Over consumption of alcohol brings problems into people's lives, as well as an entire slew of unidentified issues and problems.
@@cherylcampbell9096 I agree completely with your take on things. In her pathetic podcast same thing .the drink is always present and the glass full!
Great coverage of this case Dr. Grande !
This is what can happen when you lose your moral compass; you get swept up
in deceit!
Who are you talking about losing their morals? The Physician or Benita?
It's pretty shitty to blame a victim and act like the crime against them wouldn't have happened if they had a better "moral compass"
@@katc2040 It's hard to feel sympathy for her. Even the most stupid person I know would not drop everything and fall for what are clearly lies.
@@Sleepparalysisdemon2 I assume she was referring to both parties in this highly dysfunctional, unethical, conflict of interest-ridden, and co-dependent relationship.
@@nanettevantriesteharder2469Nobody even mentions the fact that he was already married and had two children. This alone would make him morally & ethically unacceptable, without even considering the rest of his lies. What must his nice Italian wife have been thinking of all his 'comings & goings'??? Benita is obviously the evil 'other woman', and she deserved everything she got. Who believes all that 'glamour' nonsense without pausing to 'take stock'?? What a complete airhead and self-centred fool.
Poor patients. No animal data and goes directly into humans? That’s criminal. No IRB approval? What a con man……destroying everything he touches. I assume he has lost his medical license but should be in jail for several decades. Beware of very charming people…. Not everything that shines is gold…
Hi Dr Grande. Always love your videos. Please do a case on Christopher Dunstch (Dr Death) and also Lou Pearlman. I feel both cases deserve to be known towards wider range of audience.
Oh id love one on Lou Pearlman. I think in a round about way he contributed to the death of Aaron Carter.
Her biggest red flag should’ve been when he said Bill was trying to save Hillary 😂🤣
😂😂😂
All I heard at the end: 🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍
Bravo, Dr. Grande. I love your thoughtful speculations and commitment to witty detailssssss. ❤
This man must have the fairytale playbook. It amazes me what some people are prepared to believe with little or no evidence.
Yes, he should have been writing the film scripts instead of doing those ‘pioneering’ surgeries where people died!
At least this producer walked away with her life.
Bonita was married to another newscaster, John Noel (RIP). They had a daughter and lived across the street from me in Brooklyn. She moved when they separated and he passed away unfortunately of cancer. Very nice man.
Dr Grande’s amazing alliterations always astound the abundant apps in our android applications.
Hi everyone, I think there is a TLC documentary for those who find this case to be interesting. Thank you doctor for covering it!
on Netflix, too
Thanks for sparing me watching a 12 times longer Netflix documentary.
Regarding the sentencing, it’s quite typical for Sweden.
Another excellent video, Dr. Grande. Another title for it might be "The Lies We Choose to Believe," which would be personally and professionally problematic for surgeons and journalists.
I know the answer to Benita's question about how she could get married in Italy. There are three types of marriages in Italy: a) internationally recognized traditional Roman Catholic marriage, b) internationally recognized civil marriage, and c) a fake Roman Catholic marriage ceremony for the tourism industry that looks real but is not officially recognized anywhere in the world. Real Roman Catholic marriage is between a man and a woman who are Roman Catholics, either by birth or through conversion to the faith, so as to be eligible to go through the seven sacraments of the Church. Neither of the two people can have been married before. If this type of marriage is conducted under the auspices of the Church, but it was never consummated or the original basis for such a marriage was fraudulent, it can be officially annulled without undergoing a divorce, so as to allow either or both parties to remarry a "first" time again. Even if a divorce has taken place, a dispensation from the Church for a fraudulent marriage allows the former couple to remarry, again as if the initial marriage had never taken place. Unfortunately, this particular situation makes any previously legitimate children born into the annulled marriage and/or previously unknown marriages illegitimate in retrospect.
The abridged version of this story is much better than signing back up to Netflix.
I agree, the victim oftentimes in this sort of circumstance is somewhat culpable. They want to believe the ridiculousness of their so-called fairytale.
“Bill wanted him to check Hillary out”… 😂
🤢
He's a surgeon, not a psychiatrist!
LMAO! What a lunatic!
Lol. 😂😂😂😂
An investigative journalist that had no knowledge he was married 😮 red flags 🚩 all over this situation. It should have been obvious he had serious issues that she needed to address before becoming involved with him.
Thanks for your efforts on our behalf, Dr. Grande.
She's as sharp as a bowling ball.
I was laughing while listening to all the celebrities he drop-named. I loved that “Bill wanted him to check Hillary out”. 😂 Ridiculous that anyone fell for his absurd lies and very suspicious behavior.
How could a woman like Benita believe that he was actually 'checking out' someone like Hilary Clinton's health when he just wasn't there to spend New Year with her? The obvious answer would be that he was spending it with 'the wife & kids'!. How totally and absurdly gullible this woman was!
It sounded like a kid naming off all the celebs they wanna meet one day lol.
At first I was a bit skeptical, but after watching several episodes of your channel, you provide perhaps the most compelling and relevant analysis of these often strange criminal events.
Chronic lier & narcissist marries gullible gold digger. That list made me laugh 😂 Those poor patients, had no idea tracheas could be transplated. Great analysis again. Thanks Dr G😊💚💚
@@andoletube Well he couldn't have even tried it if it weren't cleared but yes the success rate is bad.
You're calling Benita a gold digger? She was an NBC producer and had a great amount of wealth on her own. Many people fall in love with others who claim they are not who they say they are. She was just in the spotlight.
@@Sleepparalysisdemon2sometimes enough is never enough my friend.
@@Sleepparalysisdemon2 He was older & not that attractive. Am sure his wealth played into her fantasy attraction. Any logical person wouldn't fall for his continual stories. She liked the high life whether she had her own $ or not. She always wore tons of makeup, dressed fancy, had her 💅 done. That's a woman looking to marry rich.
@zenawarrior7442 There is nothing wrong with someone having their shit together. There is nothing wrong with her wearing make-up, getting her hair done, and wearing clothes that you can't afford. Just because her life is different than yours, obviously... There's nothing wrong with that. That doesn't mean she was a gold digger. He was an extremely well-respected physician at the time, and had an entire institute that backed him. There was no reason for her not to believe he was who he claimed
Good grief, this character is the living embodiment of the old joke 'how do you know he's lying? His lips are moving'.
Happy holidays to you and yours Dr. G!
Jumping from one place to another is a red flag
Love this channel love you Dr. Grande- sat at my dinner table with my family listening to you last night- my partner was like wow this guy is great! He should be on tv! Keep up the great work and thank you!
Dr. Grande - I saw the 20/20 version of this con artist several years ago. It was unnerving and frustrating to watch. Thanks so much for your excellent analysis. 🎄💜👍
Thanks for the continued great content 🎉❤
This Surgeon wasn't even qualified practicing tying his shoe laces
let alone practicing being a Surgeon!
Every surgeon I’ve known is really good at tying knots. This one might not be.
What a narcissist…had a boyfriend like that once…unbelievable how they are so charming and plausible!
These bad boys get the girls like you
Top of the morning!
Benita seems almost as unhinged as Paolo, jumping erratically from husband to husband. They were well-matched.
She didn't seem to care at all either that he wasn't a good person and caused terrible suffering. Her standards were zilch as long as she had nice stuff.
@@It-is-me...MelsieToo true. Agree 💯%.
Excellent alliteration and eyebrow work, Dr. Grande. Merry Christmas to all 🎄
Wishing you and your family a Merry Christmas and Happy New Year, Dr Grande. Thank you for your informative videos.
I remember this story. Yes, Paolo gave her a fairy tale and that's something many of us can't resist.
I have no sympathy for Benita Alexander. The moment her relationship with the doctor became romantic, she had a duty to withdraw from producing the documentary. She didn't do that, and went on to complete the documentary, which was overwhelmingly supportive of the doctor. The documentary - effectively a puff piece - could have induced additional patients to accept treatment from this monster. Unacceptable conduct.
Sylvia says she sells silver seashells at the soggy seashore in Seattle.
Great closing, Dr. Grande!
Like always, great video! Feliz navidad 🎄 dr Grande!!! Saludos from México 🇲🇽
He said Putin would come to their wedding?🤣🤣🤣🤣
Well Elton John was playing so I’m sure Putin would want to be there 😂
@@Vonononie He very very rarely leaves Russia. Dictators don't leave their countries for fear of a coup.
To top it off, he could have said he invited Kim Jung Il from North Korea. 😂 Both Putin and Kim can attend the secret wedding together.
@@koalatheworld or even people brought back from the dead, by the doctor and the Pope.
@@koalatheworld😂😂😂 perfect!
Hi Dr Grande. First of all, thank you for the insightful analysis. Love your videos. I just read this case. Very horrific. This case reminds me of Dr death - Christopher Dunstch's case, where he also maimed patients.
Please do a case on Dr Death - Christopher Dunstch, and also please do a case on Lou Pearlman. Both of these cases are very interesting and deserved to be known by wider audience, Thank you
'Secret society of Physicians'.
Its hard enough to get a group of surgeons to agree on the music they play in the OR. Imagine trying to get them to agree on a constitution for a 'society'.
'Sniper' had me rolling.
That’s some impressive journalistic instincts on that girl.
This man is horrific, from what I have seen and heard. Thank you for your assessment Dr Grande.
Perfect timing! Im just about to commute home after a 13-hour work shift. Thank you, Doctor Grande! ❤
When I first glanced at your comment I thought you had a thirteen-hour commute and that this video therefore wouldn’t use up much of that!
@@icturner23 LOL, thank goodness that wasn't the case!
Happy holidays Dr G! 🎄🎅
Benita was dazzled by all the adventures and experiences that Paolo's money could wow her with. So much of what he said really sounded fantastical and not realistic. Infatuation causes people to be in denial.
True, but being superficial, unethical and a total airhead helps too.
She even admitted that early on in their romance she witnessed him exaggerate the truth while talking to someone. That should have set off alarm bells. Also she didn't find it weird that their first date was an over the top romantic and extravagant trip to Venice yet he proposed to her by merely handing her a box in her house? The love bombing phase was slowing down. Another red flag
I am always entertained by your word smithing. General surgeons are on the top ten list of professions which have more than 2 per 100 with traits of psychopathy, sociopathy, machiavellianism. They are often big liars. I don’t know who developed the top ten list.
Loved your alliteration summation Dr Grande!
You nailed it again Dr Grande. Merry Christmas to you and the Mrs. 🎄🎅🧑🎄
I really like your view on things. Thank. You so much for sharing
Bonita is the ultimate journalist who sacrificed the ridiculous ethics to make an otherwise boring story interesting, and entertaining.
One con artist conned by another.
Reminds me of Louise Fischer, a Danish journalist who reported on a swinger's club and joined in the fun while live on radio. Both she and Bonita got screwed.
@@tarstarkusz you mean your brain was lost to MAGA.
❤❤@@jkjives1786
@@tarstarkusz While some journalists are horrible, non-critical thinkers, look for drama, don't see the big picture, and are unethical, there are also good journalists who are brave, ethical, and have done a lot of good and have held people to account. Some good journalists have lost their lives through their work.
I saw the series on this surgeon, it was fascinating.
The most compelling evidence against a person’s claim to be a CIA sniper is the person told you they are a CIA sniper.
So after the wedding fell through, Benita and her friends still went to Italy and Spain as planned. They filmed Paolo, 'his wife' and small children outside their home. He had apparently married an Italian woman many years earlier and had 2 (grown) children. It sounds like he had multiple relationships going on at the same time and had never divorced.
Just goes to show NBC doesn't select its staff based on merit or psychological health.
A female journalist proving the world we can’t do our jobs because we prioritise having a husband than doing our jobs right.
At that age and with that amount of experience she didn’t know what love bombarding* was? She was there for the money and prestige.
Just 5min into the documentary and she says “I never loved the camera,” my face was like “bitch please.” I didn’t need to watch the whole thing (though I did) to know she was no victim.
As a journalist, if I get the slightest rumour that this man is actually killing his patients instead of extending and bettering their quality of life I’d start doing my own research. Not when the castle’s staff members tell me my “Vatican” wedding doesn’t exist.
Besides she barely names the victims. She’s constantly going on about her wedding and how betrayed she felt, when what matters here is what he did to all these people.
Of the women he dated, the only victim is the Brazilian woman who had a daughter with him as she was one of his martyrs.
To be fair though this is all clear in front of us snd the programme heavily edited / we have all done stupid things that we look back on with 20-20 hindsight & say “what was I thinking”?
@@ThePossumone she was a full grown experienced woman with a daughter. All I can say is that she was extremely naive, unprofessional and even complicit.
You mean the woman who fell in love with him during the investigation of him killing her son? That woman? Chile….
@@SLa-pb1gg yes, the woman who’s son died and he instantly started calling her to seduce her. How more vulnerable a person can be? He did that in different ways with his other patients and their families. The mother of the Russian girl noticed it too.
Clearly false claims, like Bill would've been concerned about Hillary.😂 Love you Dr. G! HAPPY HOLIDAYS!
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂❤ so true!
Her gullibility and sheer stupidity in buying the most ridiculous claims may explain a lot of what we see in the mainstream media, including on #NBC.
Thank you for all your wonderful content and hard work. Merry Christmas and Happy New Year ❤❤❤
I saw this before, but didn't realize she was with NBC, the things people do for love😅 unbelievable that he went to prison only 2 and a half years, there are people in prison with a lot longer centence for driving with a suspended license 😮
Surgeons cover for each other's bad actions on a regular basis. They have large egos, and little integrity.
Scary when doctors play the part of a mad scientist. Now they are talking about womb transplants so that biological men can have babies. Great analysis as usual Dr. Grande. Loved starting my day with this video
Very weird that you had to bring transgender people into the conversation, but thanks for sharing these deep thoughts of yours.
Paolo is just the perfect surgeon to pioneer such life saving surgery lol
There are doctors who are very greedy and are willing to forgo safety in order to collect a paycheck. Phalloplasty is an example of a procedure that can have disastrous consequences. There are People who have been reduced to using a catheter after undergoing one. It is extremely involved and surgeons who are not extremely skilled microsurgeons still attempt this surgery in order to get money.
😮
@isocarboxazid I brought up surgeons not people who identify as transgender individuals. Procedures like a phalloplasty and womb transplants concern me. I have data to back up my concerns. Feel free to read my comment below. I have done research. A comments section is not the place for explaining all of it but I did expand on my comment a little.
Please cover the Elijah McClain case?
The plastic he used on the trachea operations were from soft drink soda containers cut and reshaped, probably with a hair drier.
Dr Grande, your final analysis like a poem!
FANTASIC LAST PORTION! Such smooth paragraph
oh my gosh, i remember this case! when i was young i googled my name and one of dr macchiarini’s patients had the same name as me; i did not know that she passed away in 2013.
Hi Dr. Grande, good morning from Southern California.
Excellent analysis. I too fell for a Con-man. Gave him $90grand of my money I inherited. Lesson learned.
As always I learn something new from your videos.
believe me, anybody can be fooled if it is at the right time with the right words. You have gotten your degree in common sense and skepticism.
Paolo: If you are going to lie then go big or go home.
I can't believe she fell for it.
The patients suffered severely
"A Clear Violation of ...Boundaries"- So What's New? 🤓
In this thoroughly enjoyable "take-down" of a respected surgeon we see how over-the-top so many people can be. Such individuals seem to find life as most of us know it is far "too ordinary" for themselves and they seek to find a "bigger life" and a more "you can't believe it" type of life. What evidence is there that Paolo was a victim of this type of exaggerated form of conduct: (1) To be a surgeon is something few people can claim to be. At the same time, few people can claim to live on seashells on Robinson Crusoe Island off the coast of Chile. (2) To be a surgeon involves "life and death" types of situations and "very small people" think this is a "very big deal." (3) Conceptions of the properly "romantic" is another way in which things go "off the rails." There is really nothing "magical" about Venice except the level of pollution. But, once again, "very small people" think this place is somehow "magical." What's incredible is how people live there at all. (4) Paolo's infatuation with larger characters- losers like Clinton and Obama- reminds me of the German born killer Christian Gerhartsreiter who claimed to have a direct line to George Bush))) (5) Paolo's "very small" mind was impressed by the thought of "organized assassins." It's a major "power trip" to kill someone from a distance where the victim can't see their killer. I guess Paolo is offended by the fact that he is mortal. "Most of us" have no need to rattle that chain. Let's all hope that the James Bond character disappears forever. It had a powerful hold on a specific generation of people. We've all be "shaken" enough to stop "stirring" that drink. Thank you.