Does ADHD Make Us Selfish?

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  • Опубліковано 29 тра 2024
  • It’s important to know that ADHD brains don’t have as much norepinephrine or dopamine as non ADHD brains because ADHD brains are lacking in a protein called dopamine transporters, and because dopamine is a building block for norepinephrine, our brain doesn’t have what it needs to build more of it.
    Dopamine is a hormone and neurotransmitter that makes us feel good. It’s actively involved with the reward system in our brain (otherwise known as the nucleus accumbens). And therefore if our ADHD causes us to have less of it, we are going to seek out things that help our brain release it. That means we can be more impulsive, take risks, and (you guessed it) get bored really easily. Lower levels of dopamine can also mean that we struggle with depressive symptoms, since one of the key symptoms of depression is lack of enjoyment in all activities.
    I'm Kati Morton, a licensed therapist making Mental Health videos!
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КОМЕНТАРІ • 582

  • @nathanasan7416
    @nathanasan7416 3 роки тому +363

    would totally love to see a collab between you and How To ADHD

    • @StoneyySam
      @StoneyySam 3 роки тому +8

      Yes please!!

    • @Katimorton
      @Katimorton  3 роки тому +170

      We had tried to do one awhile ago but then she moving, and I was traveling.. but we will try again!! xoxo

    • @tappitee
      @tappitee 3 роки тому +1

      This is my first video from her and when she mentioned how to adhd I knew it would be a good style for me to watch! Love the information given here!

    • @mandarinablue8438
      @mandarinablue8438 3 роки тому +5

      Yeah ! I love watching both.

    • @addisonhunt2066
      @addisonhunt2066 3 роки тому +3

      Yess!!!

  • @kirstynewton80
    @kirstynewton80 3 роки тому +86

    When you’ve had to rewatch the first 3 minutes 5 times now because you keep forgetting to listen....ADHD check!

    • @AyeshaShaSha
      @AyeshaShaSha 3 роки тому +3

      I KNOW I'm gonna have to rewatch this cos I've already forgotten...🙈🙈😔😔

    • @StaceyForguson
      @StaceyForguson 3 роки тому +2

      OH.EM.GEE!!! I thought it was just ME!!

    • @SandraKennedy-zh2ms
      @SandraKennedy-zh2ms Місяць тому

      SAME!!!

  • @lloyddragon2036
    @lloyddragon2036 3 роки тому +109

    i have ADHD, depression, and anxiety, and the symptoms all feed off each other

    • @mesia2453
      @mesia2453 3 роки тому +1

      I can relate to that feeling but I am diagnosed with neither.

    •  3 роки тому +4

      I hace ADHD (inattentive type), OCD and mild autism. Yeah commorbidity sucks

    • @ginawells4556
      @ginawells4556 3 роки тому +2

      I have autism ADHD an lots of other things

    • @ginawells4556
      @ginawells4556 3 роки тому +1

      SilleriaCordis well autism does not suck but it is good and bad

    • @onullo
      @onullo 3 роки тому +4

      That plus insomnia

  • @RoarTheRapper
    @RoarTheRapper 3 роки тому +303

    As someone who has ADHD and struggles with talking too much, I’ve often wondered if I’m really a selfish person for thinking I always need to share. It’s hard to juggle when my family says it’s fine Vs others who make it seem like they are unhappy with my yammering, but what’s helped me is really forcing myself to shut up and see how people respond. Even though I CAN be quiet, working on that discipline makes me feel like I’m not “selfish”, I just forget to let others talk sometimes.

    • @theoryquery
      @theoryquery 3 роки тому +28

      One thing of not is how those with ADHD / cognitive or social disabilities relate verbally to others.
      In one case, someone is hearing someone talk about their situation (ie a workplace where they like the job but hate the boss) many would simply comment on the situation (he sounds like a jerk but its good you like the work). Someone with ADHD or other disorders will often relate it back to their own knowledge or experiences (oh man, I had a boss like that before... *long story about boss).
      In this way, the empathize with the person through shared experience rather than just words of support or comfort, but to outsiders it can be seen as making it all about themselves.
      Its not always selfishness and wanting to be the center of attention, but wanting to form real connection with someone.

    • @trinomial-nomenclature
      @trinomial-nomenclature 3 роки тому +12

      It's nice that you were able to recognize you were talking too much and wondered if/felt it bothered other people, some people don't even realize they're doing that.
      Then, you went ahead and forced yourself to stop talking all the time to let other people talk, recognizing this is what other people in your life most likely wanted.
      Again, the fact that you could step back from the situation and recognize there was a problem and work extremely hard to fix it, is nothing short of amazing! Good for you! It takes a lot of self discipline and constant upkeep at that.

    • @watchthegamer73
      @watchthegamer73 3 роки тому +10

      I have the exact same problem with talking excessively. Though I now feel better controlled via medicine, I find the same method you use, is more effective. I think clearer and am actually able to study their reactions to know when too much is too much. I stop myself even if my entire point is not across so that they have a chance to be heard. I always struggled with overtalking someone but this has improved drastically. Sure, I still do both talking too much and talking over people sometimes, but the ability to see it is quite easier now.
      I was told by my wife, a few weeks back that my mother law remarked to her that I seemed more calm than usual. To know she saw that and took the time to say something makes me feel great because now I can feel better walking into anything I do and have some control. DBT and other therapies are actually working! I know this seems like me talking too much which is ironic BUT it isn't. It's a heartfelt story I just wanted to share in hopes I can help others the way @ROARraps just helped me feel like I'm not the only one and it's ok.

    • @reaverkai
      @reaverkai 3 роки тому +6

      You just made me realize perhaps this is why one of my best friends talks so much. I have ADD myself and its super tough to sit thru his long ass monologues on videogame lore im not really intrested in... I havent told him, I dont know if I should or how

    • @airy8291
      @airy8291 3 роки тому +3

      Me too i have to try to shut my self up

  • @noramcnabb1361
    @noramcnabb1361 3 роки тому +120

    When your name is Nora, has adhd, and therefore lacks noraepinephrine

    • @shay1525
      @shay1525 3 роки тому +12

      Loll 😂😂....also the name Nora is sooo pretty 🥰

    • @noramcnabb1361
      @noramcnabb1361 3 роки тому +8

      Shay Delano THANKYOU!! So is your name

    • @shay1525
      @shay1525 3 роки тому +3

      @@noramcnabb1361 Awwh Thank you! ....ps: im sure you know this song but on the off chance that you dont you should look up....The plough and the stars "nora" ...its so pretty and now I cant stop humming it 😊💗

    • @noramcnabb1361
      @noramcnabb1361 3 роки тому +6

      Shay Delano I looked up the song and it reminds me of a song my grandpa would hum around me but would always forgive the words and name of
      Thank you.

  • @storytellerhut3488
    @storytellerhut3488 3 роки тому +126

    I was at an ADHD training for my job a few years ago. A woman who also had ADHD told us that boredom was PHYSICALLY PAINFUL. That changed my view of how help clients of mine that struggle ADHD. This is a fantastic video Kati!! Thank you!!

    • @notinorder9630
      @notinorder9630 3 роки тому +3

      Honestly never treated boredom seriously. Always thought that if ii'm bored, then ii messed up or did something wrong or wasn't taking it seriously. Realizing that's a pretty bad way to think considering how often ii really am bored.

    • @toni2309
      @toni2309 3 роки тому +5

      Maybe that is why I never realized it was boredom that was bothering me but that I was getting uncomfortable and somehow in pain?

    • @angelavalon5245
      @angelavalon5245 3 роки тому +13

      My husband is like that. The more bored he gets the more he says it's painful. Like his whole body is winding up and cramping and no matter how he adjusts in his seat he can't get comfortable or feel like he can breathe.

    • @markpetersen1738
      @markpetersen1738 3 роки тому +9

      It's kinda funny i have never thought about boredom as being painful. But now that you say it i can definitely recognize it, maybe not just pain but general discomfort overall.

    • @ralfwashington1502
      @ralfwashington1502 3 роки тому +10

      That's when I start to shake my leg lol. Good old bouncing leg is always there plus my ability to day dream on demand lolol

  • @CatrionaThePoet
    @CatrionaThePoet 3 роки тому +114

    I have ADHD and accused of being selfish a lot, and yet I care for people so much! I'm commenting before watching! Let's strap in for this one Kati! Thank you for making this video

    • @boojebee
      @boojebee 3 роки тому +5

      Annie x I struggle sooooo much with this too. It makes me feel like a burden

    • @wiegraf9009
      @wiegraf9009 2 роки тому

      It's care for myself ("selfish") or care for others (burn out). Very hard to balance!

    • @kcstocks2004
      @kcstocks2004 2 роки тому +1

      I’ve been called that as well ..

  • @theoryquery
    @theoryquery 3 роки тому +163

    She should do a collab with Jessica from How To ADHD.

    • @Katimorton
      @Katimorton  3 роки тому +109

      I actually know her well.. and we were planning on doing one, but she was moving at the time. I will reach back out! xoxo

    • @92RKID
      @92RKID 3 роки тому +1

      Theory Query, that would be a great idea.

    • @Duncanmn
      @Duncanmn 3 роки тому +4

      Kati Morton I would be veryinterested in such a collab as an adult with ASD and issues with executive function issues and maybe ADHD.

    • @g.s9943
      @g.s9943 3 роки тому +1

      It was so cool to see both of them at the neurodiversity panel at vidcon.

  • @BruhHowDidIGetHere
    @BruhHowDidIGetHere 3 роки тому +90

    When my ADHD gets bad, and I can't find an outlet when I get REALLY bored, I get really depressed.

    • @_just_TK
      @_just_TK 3 роки тому

      It makes sense since it’s a chemical imbalance

    • @anitanapp6759
      @anitanapp6759 3 роки тому +6

      I smoke weed when I get real bored

    • @the_schmoopsie
      @the_schmoopsie 3 роки тому

      I just go to sleep. So all the time.

  • @jonathanguthridge1768
    @jonathanguthridge1768 3 роки тому +88

    Hi Kati. I was finally diagnosed with ADHD at 38 after struggling since early childhood. It explains so much. I’m now getting appropriate help to deal with it and my life has improved greatly. Thanks for touching on this.

    • @Katimorton
      @Katimorton  3 роки тому +13

      I am so glad you are finally getting the help you need and deserve :) And I am glad this video was helpful too!! xox

    • @jonathanguthridge1768
      @jonathanguthridge1768 3 роки тому +1

      Ryan Ross I’m seeing a therapist, using a schedule and task list. I use the notes app on my iPhone as a brain dump to immediately note things I think of so I can read them later. I look at each day in terms of “things I have to do” vs “things I want to do” so I can prioritize better and not lose track of things. These items go on my task list. I tried Bullet Journaling but can’t keep up with that and find that I prefer digital organization. I use fidget toys during meetings (all of my meetings are conference calls) to stay focused.

  • @shay1525
    @shay1525 3 роки тому +81

    Kati: Do any of you think of boredom as a good thing?
    Me out loud: No!
    Kati: Yeah I didnt think so.
    Me: 😊 nailed it

    • @Katimorton
      @Katimorton  3 роки тому +13

      You're so good! hahah!! xoxo

    • @iguana7050
      @iguana7050 3 роки тому

      hahaha

    • @judithkimball2125
      @judithkimball2125 3 роки тому

      Please define boredom... sometimes I forget that my definition of boredom can be different for someone who is Neurotypical.

    • @wiegraf9009
      @wiegraf9009 2 роки тому

      The only time I've thought it was "good was when I was doing so much I couldn't remember the last time I felt bored, and instead just felt exhausted! 😅

  • @megantaylor2871
    @megantaylor2871 3 роки тому +39

    My wonderful husband has ADHD and we’ve been talking about it a lot lately. One of the ways this has been relevant to us is impulse spending. We were poor when we first got married and had to budget carefully but he’s since told me it was an enormous struggle during that time to not make a bunch of random purchases because he saw a couple hundred dollars in the account. It’s also hard for him to have long discussions about things or to quickly switch gears when I need something. The fact that he tries is more meaningful to me than if he were perfect

  • @atxjazz1282
    @atxjazz1282 3 роки тому +58

    Being someone with ADHD, I often have feelings of guilt that I'm lazy or selfish. But I try and combat those negative thoughts with one word. "Why?" I ask myself why I feel that way, and I try and answer myself honestly. My answers can be "because I did this thing and it was selfish of me". Then I ask "why did you do that thing?" And I answer why. Then I ask "and what led you to do that thing? Was it because you WANTED to be selfish, or was it an impulse caused by ADHD?" It's a tedious processes, but it's what I do to help me to not be too hard on myself. I hope this helps someone else

  • @angelavalon5245
    @angelavalon5245 3 роки тому +51

    This was kinda cool. The whole ADHD thing is weird to me. I didn't find out until I was 33 and taking my own kid in for testing. The guy doing the test was watching me fidget in the corner and count ceiling tiles while my kid was at the computer and then next time I saw him he mentioned testing. I find there is a huge difference between the way my husband looks at his and the way I look at mine and I think it has a lot to do with him being tested as a kid. He grew up knowing why he does what he does and why he was different. Where I grew up thinking i was just weird and had to figure out how to cope with out knowing why I had to do it.

    • @ralfwashington1502
      @ralfwashington1502 3 роки тому +1

      It is also nice in a way to not know. You learn the hard way how to control it and can't just use it like an escape goat. No it's not easy but in the end I think it makes you a stronger person. It's to easy to blow things off as a disorder and not work on it. If you don't know you have a condition you can't try to make excuses (that could be true)

    • @angelavalon5245
      @angelavalon5245 3 роки тому +8

      @@ralfwashington1502 I dunno if I would have preferred to not know. I see your point, and I see my husband blow his issues off as ADHD and that's that. And it's annoying as hell. But then I see my kid struggle and question herself and feel bad that she can't just do something, or she forgot something. She calls herself stupid a lot, and gets mad at herself for forgetting and I remember being that kid. At least for her I can explain to her that she's not stupid and she's not a bad kid. That she just has to learn how to handle it and we know why she does it and at least a direction on how to help her. Tips and tricks that I didn't have. So sure, eventually I figured it out. But I would have rather not thought I was just to stupid to understand. I would have rather had the help.

    • @JessAyu
      @JessAyu 3 роки тому +1

      @@angelavalon5245 may i ask what your husband do? I'm young and need reference for future career, i hve adhd-add

    • @MorganBondelid
      @MorganBondelid 2 роки тому +3

      @@ralfwashington1502 midlife burnout is slowly killing me. I would have preferred to KNOW - and to have accommodations that would have helped me develop my strengths. Instead of trying to Be Like Everyone Else, and burning out from the literal impossibility of changing my neurology.

  • @TommyKins33
    @TommyKins33 3 роки тому +12

    ADHD sufferer here - boredom can be so bad I get suicidal - can't focus on anything and forget almost every thought I have through the day extreme trouble switching tasks and cannot keep track of time to save my life. However not selfish - extremely aware of my behavior and how I am coming off to others and love and value my relationships. I'm an extreme scheduler, have several alarms, and write down important things in multiple places to keep track of things. Took a long time to accept my adhd because I wasn't hyper verbal or impulsive but that's because of how I was raised. There's no one size fits all with ADHD and I'd imagine most illnesses.

    • @Katimorton
      @Katimorton  3 роки тому

      Thank you so much for sharing your experience.. and you are right, there's never a one size fits all with any illness, everyone is different :) oxoxo

  • @luisterrust
    @luisterrust 3 роки тому +29

    I always suffered from depression, but when I became selfish and took care of myself I overcame it. Hope it helps! ❤️

    • @doradorina1980
      @doradorina1980 2 роки тому +3

      i think kati is talking about a selfishness coming from obliviousness. you are talking about self care selfishness which is actually necessary to survival.

  • @illiengalene2285
    @illiengalene2285 3 роки тому +12

    I told my grandparents how I struggle with my ADHD and they told me "you are just not trying hard enough".

    • @nusagrace
      @nusagrace 3 роки тому +3

      The same... I'm tired of it

  • @pmbluemoon
    @pmbluemoon 3 роки тому +12

    I actually write everything down for the day on a wall calendar. Appointments, new doctor visits, things I accomplished for the day... it's like my journal except it's not a book I have to write in every day. I don't keep track of my feelings or thoughts, but even keeping just a timeline written down helps me out with organizing my timeline that I can't keep track of in my head. ("Oh, that was just YESTERDAY?? That felt like last week!" or "That was 3 weeks ago? I thought it was only a week at the most!")

    • @ralfwashington1502
      @ralfwashington1502 3 роки тому

      YES! I use a white board and free apps on my phone to remind me. The alarm on my phone gets used the most lol

  • @natalieedelstein
    @natalieedelstein 3 роки тому +3

    My number one ADHD coping method is finding someone (usually on Facebook) who's available to be my accountability buddy. I don't always rely on others to hold me accountable for being productive, but it is super duper effective for me when I'm in need of the support! I accomplish an average person's week's worth of work in 3 hours of being held accountable. It's miraculous. Usually, I update my accountability buddy every 10-15 minutes on what I've accomplished, and they reply (sometimes with funny memes) to let me know they're keeping tabs on my progress. It really helps me stay on task. 🙂

  • @juliamadwitch617
    @juliamadwitch617 3 роки тому +8

    I have ADHD. I take Elvanse and Inderal. Had it since 2001. Also got diagnosed with Autism 2019. Yay, I love How to ADHD.

  • @MandaTheMoonChild
    @MandaTheMoonChild 3 роки тому +5

    I love Jessica's channel. She was INTEGRAL in me getting diagnosed at 33. I have her to thank for a lot of things.

    • @_just_TK
      @_just_TK 3 роки тому +1

      Amanda Hamilton ❤️

  • @18laila
    @18laila 3 роки тому +3

    The hardest part imo is that many people STILL don't believe adhd is real and that we're always "just making excuses" for not being able to function in ways that are deemed "normal".
    Both my son and I have it and it can be really heartbreaking sometimes. As if living with it wasn't hard enough as it is, trying to gain people's acceptance and understanding or trying to constantly prove or convince others (especially family) makes it SO much harder!!
    I was diagnosed recently at age 32 and let me tell you, everything difficult about my life suddenly made so much sense. Growing up knowing you're different but not knowing how or why is extremely challenging. We suffer far more ways than what's highlighted here because our emotions are very volatile and our confidence is always knocked. As a result, never feeling "good enough" having been compared to others our whole lives and instead labelled "too sensitive", "too emotional" or "difficult" as well as the things mentioned in this vid. I could go on but I'll leave it here.
    Thanks for your vid Kati and I hope it brings more awareness and understanding but most of all, I hope for more compassion, patience, support and acceptance of this condition around the world!
    If you know anyone who has adhd, please understand the power and necessity of making them feel MORE validated, accepted and worthy than your other neurotypical counterparts!!

  • @Syne7h
    @Syne7h 3 роки тому +6

    One of the best descriptions I've come across of what ADHD is and is like.

  • @rachelmccuistion1769
    @rachelmccuistion1769 5 місяців тому

    Wow. I am a 39 year old mom, to one little boy, married for 6, and I was recently diagnosed with ADHD…and I feel like a little world of understanding has just opened up for me, and it feels like I need to “meet” myself again, as well somehow “reintroduce” myself to those closest to me, now with a little more wiggle room, guidance and actual practical support. This video completely captures my experience and train of thought. Really appreciate this selfish topic, because I feel so many bursts or phases of that, all the while feeling like it contradicts the person I really am inside and how I want to contribute to the world and to my friends and fam. I needed this video more than you know. Also, your cadence and direct and assertive speaking voice, that is very matter of fact mixed with lens of understanding is so impactful to me. I feel like you could explain the most difficult things to me and they would finally make sense. Appreciate you, your work, and for taking the time to put this together for us. …now off to do more homework (thank you for giving some action items!) and find more practical ways to manage this

  • @adamantiastathakes4542
    @adamantiastathakes4542 3 роки тому +5

    Unmedicated ADHD, currently getting yet another tattoo....Thanks Kati! I love your videos

  • @amandagaribayvlogs2348
    @amandagaribayvlogs2348 3 роки тому +6

    I’ve always felt like I’m never stimulated enough. It’s a never-ending battle.

    • @_just_TK
      @_just_TK 3 роки тому

      Ck out Kati’s video on Sensory Processing Disorder! ua-cam.com/video/baO9vLlHh5s/v-deo.html

  • @TheFitnessMarshall
    @TheFitnessMarshall 3 роки тому +17

    Love this video so much!! Thanks for all the info, Kati!!

  • @C3ns0rious
    @C3ns0rious 3 роки тому +3

    I have adhd and the talk about deadlines and pressure really spoke to me I have a hard time with deadlines far out and generally end up getting to it towards when time is running out and I get stressed and get it done in burst. Really makes getting a dissertation done ab it challenging especially given all this Covid stuff.

  • @selina9599
    @selina9599 3 роки тому +28

    i don’t knwo if i’m adhd but this vid helped me understand more bout adhd

    • @agelessorca
      @agelessorca 3 роки тому

      Same

    • @theoryquery
      @theoryquery 3 роки тому +5

      I strongly recomend Jessica's channel. Its super relatable and fun ways to talk about it.

    • @jevoblue1639
      @jevoblue1639 3 роки тому +1

      @@theoryquery My thought. Her Channel is amazing! You definitely need to check it out!

    • @jamesallengraziano6563
      @jamesallengraziano6563 3 роки тому +3

      You should be tested by professionals if you think you might have ADHD.

    • @Katimorton
      @Katimorton  3 роки тому +5

      I am so glad!! xoxo

  • @DoctaOsiris
    @DoctaOsiris 3 роки тому +34

    FYI - for those of us who aren't American (yes Americans, there are other countries too! 🤣) Norepinephrine is known as Noradrenaline in the rest of the world.

    • @_just_TK
      @_just_TK 3 роки тому +16

      Fun fact, the scientific community in the States HAS to use the term “epinephrine” because “adrenaline” was trademarked by a company back in the 70’s 🤦‍♀️

    • @boamopuffs3917
      @boamopuffs3917 3 роки тому +1

      @@_just_TK @docta osiris both fun! didn't know either, thank u!

    • @DoctaOsiris
      @DoctaOsiris 3 роки тому

      @@_just_TK Really? 😲 Well that's something I didn't know either, thanks for sharing, I'll have to check that out 😊👍

    • @DoctaOsiris
      @DoctaOsiris 3 роки тому +1

      @@boamopuffs3917 You're welcome 😊👍

  • @SiobhanColette1994
    @SiobhanColette1994 3 роки тому +6

    For me, I find that meditation is the best way to control my ADHD. People often say Ritalin (ADHD medication) makes anxiety worse. I really find the opposite. Although I am on meds for anxiety and depression as well, I find that Ritalin helps slow my mind down and let's me stay focused and allows to me think before making some impulsive decisions. But this video is really helpful!

    • @_just_TK
      @_just_TK 3 роки тому +1

      I can’t function without my Adderall

  • @crystalr9916
    @crystalr9916 3 роки тому +1

    I one thousand percent related to this video and comments. Thank you so much for this. I struggle with the anxiety I get from not being busy 24/7, it is literally painful, exhausting, and I need to learn to be okay with being still.

  • @theonlyantony
    @theonlyantony 3 роки тому +2

    Elucidating, as ever. This moved me deeply. Thank you. You have explained much of what I know to be at my core and my problems

  • @threedrie
    @threedrie 3 роки тому +2

    Thank you for this, I really needed to hear this as a person with ADD myself.

  • @XxTh3Fall3nxX
    @XxTh3Fall3nxX 3 роки тому +1

    It's almost a subconscious thing that happens, the seeking of dopamine. I don't even realize that I'm always seeking it.

  • @KillingJoke3030
    @KillingJoke3030 3 роки тому

    Thank you for the reminder to check in with the people you care about, when I'm off doing my own thing for a while I do get a little worried that I'm being selfish. Especially if I'm fired up about something, either I'm really passionate about a subject I'm binging on the internet or I'm mad at how I've been treated somewhere in my life, I can tend to be overly assertive in getting my dopamine. I've taken a lot of dumb risks and I'm probably really lucky that most of them work out in the end so it's good to check in and make sure I haven't wronged anyone lately when I notice I haven't been in the driver's seat so much lately. Thank you for all the great content you make on a regular basis, keep it up!

  • @juliaostlund9360
    @juliaostlund9360 3 роки тому +2

    I'm 20, I was diagnosed when I was 12/13, had accommodations in school from 6th grade, and I only really started getting a handle on it these past couple months. Just finished my 3rd year of college. School has been mostly pretty difficult for me until I started reaching out and getting help. I was at the point where I was ready to accept therapy and the patience to find the right meds. Meds can be absolutely crucial and potentially life-saving in the long run. ADHD has some gifts, and the ability to function and then eventually self-actualize is a beautiful thing, but it takes a lot of adjusting & vigilance for one's own health

    • @_just_TK
      @_just_TK 3 роки тому +1

      So glad you’re getting the proper treatment!

    • @juliaostlund9360
      @juliaostlund9360 3 роки тому

      @@_just_TK thank you!!!!

  • @stevensexton204
    @stevensexton204 3 роки тому +1

    You are 100% dead on, I’v been struggling with all you have said, my whole life.

  • @iPsychlops
    @iPsychlops Рік тому

    Therapist (adhd/artistic) here. You recommend many resources that I go over with clients. I'll start sending them this video! Thanks for making this resource!

  • @AliciaAngel33
    @AliciaAngel33 3 роки тому +1

    Thank you for this! I was diagnosed with ADHD at 20 and as a child my parents were often telling me to not ‘be so selfish’ and ‘think about the other people’ I lived with. I was internally screaming ‘I do think about other people!!! Like all the time!!! That’s literally all I ever do!!!’ I would just trip over myself trying to accommodate for everyone as well as the undiagnosed, untreated mess that was going on inside my own head. I’ve learnt that I’m at my best when I am being selfish and focusing on myself and my needs first, and then I’m in a better place to focus on the people I love. So thank you for this video! ♥️

  • @montannaglaze9575
    @montannaglaze9575 3 роки тому +1

    Thank you for making this video. I deal with adhd and ocd and man I wish people would know more about it. Not just “you can’t focus” or that it’s a fake thing

  • @sass-theticspractitionertr630
    @sass-theticspractitionertr630 3 роки тому +1

    I can’t remember the last time I focused so hard for a whole 10 minutes, such a brilliant video to watch, informative and inspiring, thankyou .

  • @ju6277
    @ju6277 3 роки тому +11

    It was like the universe knew I needed this video because I was just diagnosed with ADD last week and have been struggling to understand it. Admittedly though, my therapist told me that what I had was different from ADHD but did not elaborate. It would be really amazing if you could make a video about the differences between ADD vs ADHD!

    • @butterflypaint4332
      @butterflypaint4332 3 роки тому +2

      Heres my understanding of the difference between the two. I'm not an expert though and i could have a lot of this wrong so you'll want to continue doing your own research.
      So ADD and ADHD are both caused by a lack of dopamine and noraepinephrine in the parts of your brain that control your executive functioning skills. The difference is really the way the symptoms present themselves. You know that ADHD stands for attention deficit hyperactivity disorder. So they have the hyperactive and innattentive symptoms. ADD stands for attention deficit disorder. The hyperactive symptoms are not present. Those who have ADD are also less likely to get diagnosed because the symptoms that normally give the disorder away arent present (bouncing off the walls, never able to stop talking, being incredibly impulsive) But they still struggle with concentrating, organization, procrastination, working memory, etc. Its also more common in girls but it van be found in guys too.
      Hope this helps :)

    • @TommyKins33
      @TommyKins33 3 роки тому +2

      @@butterflypaint4332 I believe they are the same disorder, both ADHD. When it was first diagnosed it was called ADD with hyperactivity or without hyperactivity. The name was changed to ADHD about 7 years later to encompass the most common symptoms in one name. In 2000 the three subtypes of ADHD were officially introduced as combined type ADHD, predominantly inattentive type ADHD, and predominantly hyperactive-impulsive type ADHD to account for the main presentation variations. It is unfortunate but many people still think you cannot have ADHD without hyperactivity - because of this many people prefer to use the term ADD to clarify their experience while others choose to use ADHD as it is what they have.

    • @myemoreligion
      @myemoreligion 3 роки тому

      @@TommyKins33 people tell me constantly that i "dont have adhd, you have add", because i have inattentive type. It is so annoying to me because i feel like people either feel like "and therefore you have it less "bad" than people with " real" adhd" or they are implying that i am less annoying and should therefore not use ADHD. It feels so invalidating when people tell me "you're not hyperactive so you dont have ADHD", so very unfortunate indeed.

    • @myemoreligion
      @myemoreligion 3 роки тому

      oh and the "annoying" thing really drives me up the wall bc really people needa stop with this stigmatizing bs

    • @TommyKins33
      @TommyKins33 3 роки тому

      @@myemoreligion I feel the same way I'm not hyperactive in fact I have zero energy at all and my medication gives me energy. I've had a lot of people tell me the same thing in terms of what I "really" have and that I have it "not as bad" somehow - also yes this really bothered me saying that people with adhd are selfish or annoying - I have friends with the hyperactive type and they are not annoying or selfish and are very hard working

  • @ayeitzmylee318
    @ayeitzmylee318 3 роки тому +1

    I have high functioning ADHD,Anxiety,ODD,learning difficulties, segmental nf1 and more. It’s hard for me because all of those together creates an odd brain. I have struggled my whole life with it and your videos make me understand how it works more. Thank you, Kati!

  • @EE-vd2ig
    @EE-vd2ig 3 роки тому

    Thank you so much for this video, it definitely helps me guide a new routine with managing my adhd I often have to almost have everything clean to be focused and I have to separate myself from other people to finish work. As a person who has struggled with depression and anxiety the majority of my life I’m starting to notice good things about my adhd it allows me to be creative and artistic especially being a graphic designer it lets me focus on the details making sure everything in is the right place and to be honest it is true that especially with adhd all I want is structure it’s really the only thing right now that allows me to function and not get sad throughout the day. Thank you for all of your videos and expertise I truly appreciate it , you are blessing a lot of people with this information and helping them find hope 😊🙏🏼

  • @jesh4006
    @jesh4006 3 роки тому

    THANK YOU SO MUCH.
    this is this one thing ive never understood about myself and knowing how much this plays into my adhd is so helpful thank you

  • @thereasamay2950
    @thereasamay2950 3 роки тому +3

    This video resonated with me largely, I've been seeking answers! This gave me drive to seek resources, and see a doctor with my concerns. This topic came at a wonderful time!
    (And yea! "how to adhd" is a magically helpful channel!!)

  • @Learbeer
    @Learbeer 3 роки тому +11

    as a person with ADD I a need this video in its TikTok version cause I lost you at about 3:40

    • @reallyty832
      @reallyty832 3 роки тому +3

      I have ADD as well, she started talking too much, I lost her 😭

    • @glitoris69
      @glitoris69 3 роки тому +1

      fr i zoned out like a minute in LMAO

  • @LewisPsychology
    @LewisPsychology 3 роки тому +1

    Thank you for providing such useful content. I’ll make sure I show this video to my ADHD clients.

  • @rebeccamurray4161
    @rebeccamurray4161 Рік тому

    Been watching your videos on ADHD my 9yr old son was recently diagnosed, it's definitely been a journey so far with different testing had to do with him and appointments. I was also told it was hereditary. I have trouble with my mental health and have auditory processing disorder but I'm getting rescreened and making sure that is exactly my problem. Iv struggled so much with trying to connect with others making friendships, concentration, and being told by others I'm weird or selfish at times. I can also be very blunt or tell it like I see it. Always tell truth for most part and I don't have a filter in sense I'm so open about my life, it can trigger other people. Will know my results next week and moving forward one step at a time in regards to the right strategies and support.

  • @Octopossible
    @Octopossible Рік тому

    So relevant to me! Thank you Kati, for *all* your videos.

  • @minerva3527
    @minerva3527 3 роки тому +1

    Thank you for making this video!

  • @lilajean8146
    @lilajean8146 3 роки тому +11

    OHHHHH, sooo excited to watch this one!!!! I have ADHD so this hits close to home for me!!! Great job on the video, I loved what you said, it was amazing!!!!! I actually have been struggling with this, thank you for the advice and helping me understand my ADHD!!!! Love you Katie!!!!!!💕💕

    • @Katimorton
      @Katimorton  3 роки тому

      Awe I am so glad it was helpful!! yay!! xoxo

  • @lynn_hathaway15
    @lynn_hathaway15 3 роки тому +7

    I never clicked on a video so quickly. Thanks Kati

    • @Katimorton
      @Katimorton  3 роки тому

      I hope it was helpful!!! xoxo

  • @ZombotXV
    @ZombotXV 3 роки тому

    For weeks I've been staying up all night asking myself if I'm being selfish by only having personal projects in my mind and postponing that call to my grandma to check on her and many other things, I remembered this channel and came here looking for help and I'm so grateful that the most recent video is exactly about this topic, thanks a lot Kati!

  • @toni2309
    @toni2309 3 роки тому +1

    Oh. My. God.
    Thank you for talking about that topic.
    Thank you.

  • @heckster4life
    @heckster4life 3 роки тому +1

    Thank you for the very insightful videos. I always feel like I walk away from them with a lot more knowledge on how to help myself

  • @isabellabihy8631
    @isabellabihy8631 3 роки тому +1

    I remember the "sledge hammer psychology" of my parents, who were not aware that such a condition like ADD and Asperger's exist. I was told to "behave", to do as I was told, just subordinate to life's requirements. I grew up in the 1960ies and 1970ies. For decades I suffer from depression, and anxiety, on top of the previously mentioned psychological issues. I was diagnosed in my mid fifties, and it was a relief. Immense relief.
    Stuff that interests me catches my attention and focus. I easily give up on less interesting things, especially when there is resistance, or obstacles. I love being alone, I get stressed out by too many people around me. Too many is more than one. And if the one person leaves, it's heaven.
    I was told to be selfish, because I "zoom out", rather grabbing a book, and retreating into a quiet corner, and do not intermingle. Oh, I do talk to people, rather stand by and listen, though, and suddenly retreat. Too much is too much. Chat about relationships bores me. I retreat. If asked why I do not participate, I have learned to say that it is stressful for me. Irritated glances, why, company is wonderful. Yikes! Grin and bear it.

  • @larag1764
    @larag1764 3 роки тому

    Thanks for helping us learn about ADHD. I really like your videos as you use simple language, provide good examples / scenarios to explain technical terms, are non-judgemental and supportive. Hi from Australia 🤗

  • @bethmaguire414
    @bethmaguire414 3 роки тому +1

    Routines are life saving for me!! Especially self care ❤️

  • @leannal.5046
    @leannal.5046 3 роки тому +1

    This is a great video thank you Kati for making this video

  • @jevoblue1639
    @jevoblue1639 3 роки тому +1

    Great Video!! Helps other people to understand more what's going on with us!

  • @YokoOnoTM
    @YokoOnoTM 3 роки тому +1

    Thank you! Very thorough.

  • @Silveryback
    @Silveryback 2 роки тому

    Watching your videos transports me into the logical, self-assessing mindset that is productive and sets a pace for my ability to create a plan to improve my environment, temperament, and long-term goals. Thank you for creating this channel, so low-income people have free access to exceedingly helpful, credible sources of help.
    You're awesome, your videos have been immensely helpful.

  • @bethlectic7532
    @bethlectic7532 3 роки тому

    this is so helpful, thank you Kati!

  • @milenaciaramella3524
    @milenaciaramella3524 3 роки тому +4

    Kati your voice is beautiful and soothing 💜💜💜

  • @lilajean8146
    @lilajean8146 3 роки тому +15

    3:23
    Yayyy, Jessica is amazing I love her channel!!!!😁

  • @milenaciaramella3524
    @milenaciaramella3524 3 роки тому +2

    Every Monday, I’m waiting for your video 💜💜💜 I really love your videos

    • @Katimorton
      @Katimorton  3 роки тому

      Awe yay!! I am so glad :) xoxo

  • @gabriellaa1091
    @gabriellaa1091 3 роки тому +2

    Much appreciate this video, i dont suffer from ADHD but some of these tips can help with the inner critic attacks of C-PTSD

  • @laurenjohnson2267
    @laurenjohnson2267 3 роки тому +1

    thank you for this video! I’ve been struggling with my ADHD so much during quarantine, without any schedule my ADHD is insannnne. it feels like there are 100 tv shows on at once in my brain and I never know what to pay attention to

  • @ems7623
    @ems7623 2 роки тому

    Wow, Kati. Coupling this discussion of ADHD coping skills and symptoms to one of the deeply concerning subjective experiences - or maybe "worries" - of many of us with ADHD really shows how great of a therapist you really are.
    I don't know if you'll read this, but if you do, just allow me to say thank you for everything you do. I seem to come back to your channel every few months - at least, ever since I received my late diagnosis of adult ADHD. Sometimes, it is because one of my dopamine-seeking activities is learning (and psychology interests me). Often, it is because I have struggled so much - and have come to recognize that, in some ways, I always will - in the sense that with ADHD, there will always be something to work on.
    I've also been unemployed for a couple years and that has meant that I'm without access to competant mental healthcare. Sure my medicaid primary care provider manages my meds just fine - but i have no one to work with on accountability, coping skills, etc. I hope you realize that you are helping countless people with all kinds of difficulties accessing mental healthcare. You really are a hero.

  • @alymaple8936
    @alymaple8936 Рік тому

    Oooo!! Clicked as soon as I saw this because I’ve been pondering on this/struggling with it for a while. I’ve been making an effort to improve though. Still learning things about myself that I should’ve noticed before but maybe was in denial about lol not always fun taking a hard look. I feel guilty for being selfish towards family members, friends, significant others… Self awareness is key

  • @StaceyForguson
    @StaceyForguson 3 роки тому

    THIS!!! This video is ME 100%!! I learned slowly that I'm a selfish person. I was diagnosed with having ADHD, Anxiety and depression a few years ago. I already knew growing up that I was depressed and had some anxiety, but I didn't know about the ADHD until I talked with a Psychologist. It's VERY comforting to know and learn about what's going on in my brain that causes me to act and react the way that I do! I ABSOLUTELY LOVE your videos, @Kati!! Maybe someday we can do a video therapy session!?

  • @gelukkig1357
    @gelukkig1357 3 роки тому +1

    Thank you so much for this video. It was verry insidefull for me.

  • @TheKnightArgent
    @TheKnightArgent Рік тому

    The algorithm pointed me to this at a perfect time. I just had a traumatic event where I was called selfish and I knew that what I was doing was heavily influenced by my ADHD, but having this validation really helped. Thank you so much.

  • @jenniperkins4260
    @jenniperkins4260 3 роки тому

    I’m so GLAD you said “bored “ bc that’s what my life has been since I’ve been off my adderal - absolutely miserable !!! Can’t stand it ! I need the stimulant to make me calm (??) driven and happy.

  • @nataliawytrykowska1445
    @nataliawytrykowska1445 3 роки тому +2

    I am very thankful for this video! Thank you for helping me understand better my condition. I would love that you make more videos ADHD related! Love you and your content, it's always interesting to learn something new! 💝🙌🏼

    • @Katimorton
      @Katimorton  3 роки тому +1

      Of course!! I am so glad the video was helpful :) xoxo

  • @angelahagen9003
    @angelahagen9003 3 роки тому +1

    Thanks for the video!!!

  • @kattwin1
    @kattwin1 3 роки тому

    This was a great video, thank you!!

  • @shireld
    @shireld 3 роки тому

    Hello Kati, I've been watching your videos for quite a a while now; this channel helps me with my own struggles. You are amazing and so helpful!!!(: Thank you for these eye opening, Precised, important, full of information videos! Many things became more clear to me about myself, and this video was the best! I'm gonna take your advice and explain it to my significant other and parents! Thank you so.

  • @jlett86
    @jlett86 3 роки тому +4

    Watching this helped me realize why I am emotionally attracted to my BPD wife... She gives me thoes strong feelings I can't give myself.

    • @gail9566
      @gail9566 Рік тому

      OMG YES!!! I've spent my life attracted to borderlines and now I know why!!

  • @tylermosier5461
    @tylermosier5461 3 роки тому +1

    Thank you 😌

  • @markjones2349
    @markjones2349 2 роки тому

    I'm soon turning 42 and I have never been diagnosed but I really believe I have ADHD. I've lost all enjoyment in all of my hobbies. Only things that stimulate my brain is video games, women, and getting high. I usually put things off till the last second. I have a hard time being organized until the clutter gets enough to really annoy me. My parents live with me at my house and their French bulldog is my best buddy in the world and keeps me focused and happy. I'm thankful for him for sure. I love him so much.

  • @firewolf1008
    @firewolf1008 3 роки тому

    Thank you💜

  • @smikkims9810
    @smikkims9810 Рік тому

    Thanks for creating this video for us🙂

  • @plasmamig
    @plasmamig 3 роки тому

    This video really hit home!!!

  • @feras5834
    @feras5834 Рік тому

    Thank you ❤️

  • @hilaryd6341
    @hilaryd6341 3 роки тому +1

    Thank you❤️❤️❤️

  • @kathythureen9341
    @kathythureen9341 7 місяців тому

    I CAN RELATE TO ALL OF THESE THINGS YOU WERE TALKING ABOUT ON THIS VIDEO.

  • @sabinestratmann4175
    @sabinestratmann4175 3 роки тому +2

    Thank you for this video, my Dad has ADHD so this helped to understand him.

    • @Katimorton
      @Katimorton  3 роки тому

      Of course!! I am so glad it was helpful :) xoxo

  • @jess8676
    @jess8676 3 роки тому +2

    woah! kati is almost at 1million well done!!!!

  • @thegaypoopinthetoiletyouar8187
    @thegaypoopinthetoiletyouar8187 3 роки тому +2

    thanks for this video you always teach me alot!😁💖

    • @Katimorton
      @Katimorton  3 роки тому

      Awe of course!! I am so glad it was helpful!!! xoxo

  • @watchthegamer73
    @watchthegamer73 3 роки тому +1

    Cross linking over to this video from others I watched made this worth every second. I feel selfish at times and it was like I didn't care. I continue to work on all aspects of ADHD management including medication, and I am finding it all effective. I've changed as a person already but this video really helped me focus on the behaviors I struggle with daily. Sure, with medication, I am better able to control it but truth is, it's just a method to help me obtain a sense of identifying a behavior from ADHD and control it immediately. Talking too much, which is what you may interpret this, and is ironic ha!, but I can now stop and not talk over people. Thank you for the video Kati. I am subscribing now.

    • @_just_TK
      @_just_TK 3 роки тому +1

      Welcome to the Community!

  • @aldeliealberts9387
    @aldeliealberts9387 3 роки тому +1

    She is so amazing ❤❤

  • @niknik.z
    @niknik.z 3 роки тому

    You’re changing my life 😍🙏💗 love you 😽

  • @ambersexton517
    @ambersexton517 3 роки тому +3

    I was just diagnosed at 31 with ADHD. Literally never even thought of it as a possibility until I started seeing my most recent therapist. So I'm still trying to figure things out and this video definitely helps me understand what ADHD is and make more sense of my ADHD symptoms. I don't want to use my ADHD as an excuse for why I start dozens of projects and never get them done, but I am still not certain what is caused by my ADHD and what isn't, and if it is ADHD what do I do about it. Because I have a very short attention span, and sometimes I can get so bored it's almost physically painful

  • @sofienasiha954
    @sofienasiha954 3 роки тому +1

    Hey Kati ! Happy seeing u after a long long time ! Hope u and Shawn r well and safe ! Love ur dress sooo much !!

  • @ZKOSS1
    @ZKOSS1 3 роки тому

    Very informative. Thanks!

  • @safeera8239
    @safeera8239 3 роки тому +3

    I've ben dignosed my hole life with ADHD(or at least as long as I can rember) it's a core reason I also have GAD. How I put it most often nowadays is my brain dosent stop,ever. Not even when I sleep (because I always dream) it's a real strugle that efects evreything in my life,body and evreything around me. How to ADHD has ben very helpfull to me along with mental health talk on UA-cam. I strugle with a list of other stuff,but adhd is a big one.

  • @rklos11
    @rklos11 3 роки тому +1

    *Vyvanse Kicks In*
    Hey Kati! Always so helpful seeing your videos. For me, the action of the dopamine from my meds is OK if I already planned out my day, and the fact I get the biggest dopamine rush from being helpful and productive at work helps keep me on track. BUT... if the structure and routine gets off track...THAT'S when I can become selfish. Party from being distracted and not able to empathize channel the energy in the way I want to. CNS on fire being like some fight or flight shit LOL. I also think my dose became stronger since working from home. I want to ask my Psych to reduce. I'm not intending to be selfish by talking about myself, but it's what I know best, and I'm not qualified to give general advice haha. Maybe other can relate too 😊
    I've grown a lot lately. I've sensed in it a lot of people resently, including you 😊 Not that you were ever missing anything 😍😍. Growth is beautiful, and life long. Sometimes it's gradual, sometimes it's like...BAM! If you're ready or not haha. There's always a bright side, but it's harder to find sometimes. Experience helps :) looking forward to the next one ✌☝🏾❤