He "Forgets" to Reply? Take Back Your POWER!
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- Опубліковано 2 чер 2024
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The problem is, people want to seem like they’re not interested, and men are no exception. We are all acting like showing feelings is bad, but this is so messed up. Love shouldn’t be a game where we are always hiding all of our cards and playing them when we want. Love is saying “I’m not going to play this game because you and I aren’t pawns in a game”
Most people are just not brave..
Agree! And my guy and I discussed this (we called it a 2 way street). I was crystal clear I don’t play games. Guess something changed. It just hurts…. it’s getting a little less ea day….
So well said and so true of this generation!
Amen
Sooo true. It’s so unfortunate that we can’t be honest with each other.
My ex came back pretending he's changed but his behaviour was: ignoring my messages and hanging up on me all the time finding excuses. I told him straightforward that I didn't understand why he was acting this way, that it wsnt normal and that I will not tolerate this attitude. My friends and family don't do that to me, why would you? He said sorry and that he would put some effort. Next thing you know, he does it again. For me: Game over 🎮 I literally dumped him. He keeps calling and sending messages 📞 Funny how suddenly he has time to chat and can give me attention. Unfortunately for him, I will never accept his BS anymore. He did not change, I did. NEXT ➡️
Just like my ex from Japan, he was also acted like that.. don't take him back again
He's a narcissist. Trying to suck you back in, but he can't help pushing the envelope to see how much you'll tolerate. The more you tolerate, the more he'll treat you badly. Guys like that need to be kicked to the curb asap.
They never change I won’t give other chances
He showed you who he was the first time. Personally I don’t believe in second chances because you’re seeing him for who he truly is if you take him back he may behave himself for a little while until he’s comfortable again then fall back into his usual behaviour - it’s a waste of time, upset and effort. Better of just dump and move on the first time!
🥳🥳🥳
I've realised long ago that you can't force someone to like you. You only have control over your own actions. If someone is interested they'll show it consistently with actions. Not just with words!!!
WORD
Well said!!! 💯👏👏👏
Too true
Sometimes you can have control over others as well
I never want love to feel like I have to be strategic.
You are right. I changed the “game” too. I mean, if someone is consistently taking hours or days to respond then I will not be available when he’s convenient. And really, when someone is interested, man or woman, they’ll be consistently trying. I draw the line at CONSISTENCY. If you are not consistent, boy I am out. This takes practice tho, because it’s easier said than done but mindfulness helps.
Agree in principle- harder to back off when down the path because there are good things too!
But I’m working on it now by reminding myself I want a fun life- with or without him.
Perfectly said.
How do you do out precisely? Do u just ghost him or..?
How did you cut the contact? Did you block them? Or did you not reply anymore? Or did you tell them what's up before you left?
i never understood about this shit of taking days haha shit... more than 24h? I double text and if dont get a good answer with some explanation for free will in less than 24h is bye bye
My guy ALWAYS replies. And fairly quickly. What’s funny though is waiting 10 minutes for him can seem like an eternity. Yet waiting for hours for a friend or family member to reply seems like nothing. Lol. Very thankful for someone who’s actually reliable. Always early. Never cancels. And always calls right on time. I recognize I have a good one.😊
Hopefully it will remain consistent over time.
@@BrendaBaBoom 9 months so far :)
That’s great 😃
Happy for you. Hope I can find the same 🤞
or they acting they didnt understand message after month and a half, or they are far. They change decision after emotins, they cant.commit. move on
Totally the wake up call I need with a guy whose generally nice and communicative with messages and chats, but takes too long to reply sometimes, and although he usually apologizes for it, something feels off and some of his answers are coming across immature and low value with low effort, and he’s not progressing anything forward, so I’m not interested in him anymore. I wish him well but moving on. Thank you 🙏 😊
What have you done to progress things
This hits hard with the “friendships” in my life. It sucks but if people don’t value me I’d rather be alone than taken advantage of. Same with family.
YES yes and yes- this is so important in order to not waste precious time and warmth... Go for the right people
Very, very true!!!
they changed they mind and cant commit
This doesn't just apply to romantic relationships. It applies to every relationship. Best to go with the flow so that your life is easy and calm!
Elisa Tseng- You are right. These video's have opened my eyes.
Just follow the wind... text once, if no reply, you move on. No need to block him or her.
When someone ignores me I always seem to lose interest. Probably because I realised at some point that if someone isn't interested in me, it's a waste of my time to chase them. You can't make people like you and if they don't, that's OK too 🙂
Years ago I thought I should take more initiative to ask a man on a date but I realised that if a man is interested he will usually ask. And if you ask him, he might say yes out of politeness or to see what he can get from you, even though he isn't interested in a relationship 🤣
Woman:Let a man chase you.Dont beg for love.Dont make it easy for them.Let him fight for you.You dont give your body away so easily,do you?YOU are valuable,so invest in yourself.Love yourself first.
Yeah. Same applies to men.
nitaka Is there any men (who you like) who chase you? Especially after you not make it easy?
None for me.
In my experience, the ones who chase me relentlessly are the ones I don't like.
I wish, whether men or women, no one should entertain the person playing mind games with them. And may everyone be enough for themselves, seeking no validation, and loving the ones who love them.
If he says he’ll call and he doesn’t. .. I’m gone 😜
I love it when you empower us to value ourselves more when we are struggling with dating unavailable men.
I was definitely meant to see this! The boy I was interested in has been doing this for weeks where he’ll ignore me or “forget” to text me. Every-time it’s some excuse as to why he didn’t text. I’m ready to move on and stop putting effort in.
I know. And he even said he doesn't play games Lol.
You don't need this nonsense. This is a child at play. Mind games - they end up draining you.
Keep us updated ladies
Men who have options don’t need to reply right away. That’s prob why your chasing him to begin with. But good choice, I’d say focus on getting better so that he starts chasing you. It’s a game of cat and mouse at the end of the day. Seems you are the cat
How did you move on exactly? Like..did you text him before you left, or ghosted him, or just blocked him?
When I got into smth like that, I straight up asked if they were still interested in contact. And they said yes but kept the low energy reply, I would tell them that I don’t feel the connection and have a nice day. Move on 🤷🏼♀️🤷🏼♀️🤷🏼♀️
@Blessing Sound Why would i? I dont need it. I was just telling personal experiences
ALL of this is 100% FACTS!! I have been dealing with this since September.. and doing everything you said the person being ignored would do. He's been doing everything to a "T" with what you said the person doing the ignoring does. For months I've been going out of my mind trying to figure out WTH is going on with him. His lackadaisical replies if I get one. And the messed up part is that NO RELATIONSHIP was ever intended!! Just a "friendship". I'd get all the reassuring responses when I'd ask him why he takes forever to reply.. "I'm just really busy...don't take it personal...I reply when I get a chance...You're not bothering me.." blah blah blah.. it's all been a game to him and I repeatedly fell for it! I tried many times to just end it too by telling him I'm done with being ignored. He'd come out of the shadows and pull me back in. You'd think I'd be smarter than this seeing that I'm almost 50yrs old... nope, he got me, he played me and is still playing me. So many times I tried to make it work and explain myself and why I got so upset and he'd respond with "all good". Damn I've been such a fool!!!! Seeking his validation because I doubt myself so much and he knows it. The power I gave to him willingly blows my mind. I allowed him to make me feel like I'm worthless, nothing and like I didn't matter at all. I'm so mad at myself for this. But THIS was the video I NEEDED to watch! THANK YOU!!!!!
This is Great & confirmation! I VERY recently had a guy (that I've known 5yrs) tell me he "wants to have a deeper relationship." He went on to tell me this elaborate "plan" HE had in HIS mind for the future.(sounded like I was just a "Good idea" to add to his "plan") After only 3x seeing each other, he EXPECTED more. When I didn't give in to what HE had wanted/ "planned" .. .. now I haven't heard from him in a week & 1/2. NO BIGGIE here! I thank God that He removed the wrong man for me out of my life!
That's called "love bombing" and that is narcissistic behavior. If you value your sanity and your life, don't get involved with him or anyone like this.Trust me...a real narcissist is constantly fishing for multiple partners and they gather people for future use. Just for USE. There is no love involved, and there never will be. A narcissist will try to kill your Spirit. They suck energy from people any chance they get, and very much so through sex.
Oh, I needed to hear this! It's been 2 years of being strung along!! It's hard to even be his "friend" with his inconsistent hot and cold behavior! This has helped me so much. If my needs aren't being met...then I know he won't ever be able to meet them! I deserve the best 👌 not the leftovers
You go gurl ✌️✌️❤️
Clasic dismisive avoidant attachment style behavior, run dont walk!!!!
what to do if u try to breakup with him and he just won't let u go..!!
i need help 😭
@@GaAg2 he is a player girl. Value your self and dismiss him
@@MetaPhysStore0770 more like a narcissist. I'm a da. Yet don't ignore people like that
This is a good example of the need to match his effort. Dont continue to send frequent or lond msgs if he's not. This is a 'tell'. When he remains brief or inconsistent he is showing you, he's establishing, who he is... *Believe him!!*
He was a narcissist. Glad I saw it through after a few months. He's a grown man with a kindergarten mind. Were still in the talking-getting-to-know stage and I'm so glad I'm out of it all. I don't need a Man Child in my life.
I always watch your videos till the end, Brian. Your videos helped me in my dating life rn. Thank you ❤
Mine too! It took me 8-9months to realize it and I am glad I did! A little too much but thanks for these videos you put 2+2 together. How could people be so cold right?
@@cucar8363 isn't it waste of time spend 8-9months 😌
Mine is a toddler trapped in a grown up man body 😃 i walked away from him already ,we're on a talking stage everything's seems cool the chemistry is great but he got a Peter pan syndrome so im out... Don't need something that's not going anywhere...
@@marylcampbell2409 Hi, how did you figure it out please? I think mine too...
@@starsdance98 no. It’s a lesson.
Why are people so bothered in waiting for reply and texting. It’s simple if he was not calling you, he is not into you! Text is only for setting plans or sharing links and photos, duh!!!
This!!!
First part is true , second half is not true for everyone
💙 Yes! I completely agree with everything you said.
It’s my biggest pet peeve in any relationship. I understand that life gets busy but it comes to a certain point where it’s not worth my time to invest in a person who I feel is not matching my efforts…whether it’s a romantic relationship, friendship, or even a family dynamic
🙂❤️👍💯💯
💙
Yes, I've experienced this in friendships too!
As mentioned here as well…. Not just romantic relationships but most people. Days later they respond, maybe weeks. I’ve come to accept that you’re just not a priority, and take it from there.
So great Brian ! You just confirmed what i did recently. I blocked and deleted 3 inconcistend Guys. It feels si good not to be in this Drama anymore 😅
Thank you Brian 🤩🤩🤩
wow..I soon needed to hear this! I've been tortured by a guy who wants me but doesn't want me...I'm taking back control at last! Thank YOU
Mee too. He even said he was looking for me and looking me for my name on facebook but I didnt add him cuz I dont know him. We slept on first date. It was sooo bad and too quick and I was hesitating and not replying to him. He stop texting me 3 days ago. I really liked him
So helpful . My time and effort is valuable. To all partners of dismissive Avoidant attachment style, please leave them asap. They don't deserve us. They might be nice ppl and they probably don't intend to give us silent treatment, but the thing is, they will never prioritise you. You will keep waiting for their text and they will takes days to reply, or worse, not even reply. LEAVE
Edited : DAs never change. I gave one more chance after 100 chances seeing change in him since he loves so much, but he ghosted & no reply. He is absolutely wonderful and a kind man, but ghosting & silent treatment & not priortizing me is not ok
I can esp relate to your sentence number 5…
Yep 👍
I feel you… i gave him for 2nd chances and ask him what is his intentions.. still its like a childish act. Blah blah.
That guys a narcissist not an avoidant. Or could be an overlap. I for example get a da on tests but I don't usually give people the silent treatment that regularly
You dont accidentally ignore someone. It's intentional.
It's so nice to hear some basic common sense! Sometimes we lose this in the craziness of love and emotions.
you are absolutely right , dating someone like him is a nightmare !
Its intresting because I just experienced this recently. I used to overthink and maybe sometimes send another text when they didnt respond. Thankfully I’ve stopped doing that now. No more giving the benefit of the doubt to guys that give me the bare minimum. I just move on. And if he wants my attention again, he better make it worth my time.
@Ava …wow I like the way you said “ no more giving benefit of the doubt”.
no effort is not ok and doesn’t meet my standard!
So this week I’ve been focusing more on “advancing my life” and hopefully he’ll fade to the background
Rejection is God's protection.
Totally agreed!
Recently, one guy doing the same thing to me for couple of months. When I stop contacting him, he starts to initiatively message me; if I respond to him, he continues ignoring my messages or giving me a quiet short answer.
Narcist
If I am that easily to forget he’s not the man for me. I completely understand getting busy or own dying but forget OK forget my number
I agree with this soooo much…. If I’m feeling this stressed out now couldn’t imagine being in a relationship with such a man… sounds narcissistic to me.
Thank you!!! This was what I needed to hear. Pffft such a relief, now I really can let it go. Thank you so much!!! ( I already concluded that he probably" wasn't that into me" but was busy thinking for him, making excuses etc. ) You my dear sir, just set me free🙏👌👊✌️
This is exactly what was happening to me! I am so glad it is over now. The trash takes itself out. Thank you for this video!!
This is literally my situation right now! It's like you knew I needed these answers 😀
I think we rely too much on texting and DMs. Pick up the phone or go see them.
What difference will that make if they don't even want to text lol
I loved this video! We should never fight for his attention and value ourselves!
Hi 👋 Janet, how are you?
Epic convo real af🙌🏽🙏🏽
Wow you made this video just in time. Thank you. My value isn’t determined by who replies and doesn’t reply to me. 🥰
Exactly my situation! It's been 2 days since I asked what he felt for me. Thank you so much for sharing this! You are Heaven sent! God bless you always🙏
So true ! Thank you, Brian
Perfect timing for that one to pop up! Thanks 🙏🏼
That was really helpful thanks bran.
You have helped me sooo much!
Amazing! So helpful! Thank you so much Brian! ❤️
Thank you for this ♥️
That was great thank you🙏🏼
Brian, thnx for great content! I enjoyed watching this video a lot. You really brought to the point that what was happening to me with a guy for 1,5 years, all the things/scenarios you described I‘ve been through and it feels amazing to know that this emotional and never satisfying rollercoaster will not happen again because I finally understood it🙂.
Thank you Brian 😊 for keeping us updated n this video is an reminder for us 💯
Thankyou💕always enlightening ‼️
Experiencing this rn.Thanks for the advice 🙂
Thanks Brian this video helped me a lot!
Thank you! Very helpful
This is gold 💯
Thanks for the enlightenment ❤️
Thank you. I needed to hear this 😊❤
Just what I had to hear! Thanks a lot for this
That's GOOD STUFF! Thanks so much for your guidance!!!
thank you for this advise ! I really needed it. Guess we can also use it with friends who do not take time to reply. Or reply days later, always having excuses.
You made me lough sooooo much ! So true ! So well said, so much attached to the ground !
..... on the dark side of the moon ....😅
Thank you for this!!❤️❤️
But how do I get my mind to stop doing this? How to actually stop the mind from wondering off into putting so much importance to them?
My therapist once said you cannot tell your mind what not to think about. If you say "I shouldn't be thinking of them" Neurons are fast as hell, so by the time you said that, you already remembered that time when they were nice to you, their faces and thoughts are bombarding your mind. When I notice I'm thinking about him I say out loud any random though or some affirmations. I know I am not his priority, so I stop justifying his actions. I haven talked with him for a month when I used to send him messages everyday. I am struggling but I am fighting back. Wish you the best, you're an amazing person, you are valuable and deserve better ❤
Wow thank you for this message.
Thank you Brian 🙏🏻
This also applies to other relationships, even worse, professionally at work! It's funny that in the time we live in, when we have ALL the technology and means to connect to others, we are growing more inefficient in communication. All these ghosting, "seenzoning" and mind games shows we don't even know how to be decent with one another.
I felt this...thanks for your amazing insight and on point humor. You are so astute and lovable.
Thank you for this ❤
Thanks coach. Really love it when you post a video :)
Loved this. You tell it in a charming and funny way but your message is serious and clear. Great job.
You really broke this down well. Thank you.
Super👍 well said, Brian.
I saw this video at the perfect time! Thank you!
You make me laugh, and I am grateful for your message ! Crazy how I know all these things but your reminders keep me on point ♥️
I wish I had saw this earlier..right on!… a story like this almost cost me everything…but certainly my health , physically emotionally mentally !
Totally enjoyed listening to you Brian.
Thanks. Its good advice
Thank you, this was PERFECT timing & now have 2 to drop that I'm not waiting on anyway!! 🥰
I Love This...Thanks Brian...❤🤗
Truly enjoyed your advice, thanks 🙏 very much.
Omg, your videos are so calming, and revitalizing to watch. I love your energy dude.
Very good! Love your examples 😂 with a serious message that consistency is key.
Thank you for posting videos. 📫 I love it when you do that.
Thank you I just keep replaying this to encourage myself to keep moving on and not accept less.
You are amazing and thank you!
You’re so right, thank you for your wisdom. God bless you 🙏🏻
Thank you for your time and effort! 💚🤗🌴😎
What a great advice!
Oh...
It really sound easier said than done. When feelings and deep emotions are involved, it'd surely take a whole lot of courage to move on. Anyway, this is helpful so I'm taking notes for future reference.
Thank you Brian 🤗
This video come at a good time. Thank you.
Congratulations Brian! You are SOOO ON POINT in THIS VIDEO.... actually in all your videos...I love them all!!!
I regret not seeing this earlier, it would be extremely beneficial 4years ago!!! 💗 Thanks Brian, thank you for your insightful videos and great newsletter where you share your knowledge and help many to create "the sculpture we want" :)
Thank you Brian, this was very helpful ! Love your videos! 🙏🤗
Thank you sooooo much!❤
"Let me tell you....lots of fun!" Priceless.
Omg! I didn't know this, now I know. The explanation makes me understand why. Thank you so much for this video
You rock. Thank you for your videos
Thanks 🙏 very helpful.