An Outcasted Hasid Finds the Courage to Live By Her Own Beliefs: Deena Chanowitz
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- Опубліковано 19 лип 2024
- Sexually abused by a rabbi in her Lubavitch (a branch of Hasidism) community, abandoned by her parents, and turning to Bulimia to try and make herself disappear, Deena Chanowitz has stared down mountains of suffering to go from suicidal to getting into med school.
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Deena's video was edited by Andrea Cruz and Naomi Ranz-Schleifer
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"I exist and therefore I'm good enough."
Possibly one of the best quotes I ever read
Is that still true, if it's said by Hitler, or Stalin.
i might get this as a tattoo
son tfgba are you good? you're doing a lot rn
son tfgba you know what, i'll pray for you.
Mental hospitals are not equipped to deal with trauma in a way that promotes healing. They're just like prisons. Thank you for sharing your story
Very true
Indeed, it's a miracle she found a psychiatric trauma unit with an available bed.
This woman is our warrior. And her energy and aura is still so positive and lovely.
the power in her being shamed about her own body for not covering her collarbone to being on camera uncovering way more than her collarbone. not because of abuse or being forced to do anything but because she can. beautiful. one of my favorites.
She still has her orthodox accent. she is so strong and beautiful this story made me cry
Her story reminds me why sexual education is so important! Even starting early before puberty gives you the knowledge to know what is right and what is wrong... gives power to say 'no'!
Kara K yes! I totally agree even though I'm 100% a Christian. When is it ever a good idea to completely isolate someone from the truth especially when they're becoming a young woman or man? It infuriates me that these parents think it's okay to completely Shield their children from the world and then wonder why their children don't know what's going on when someone takes advantage of them. They could be spared so much pain and hurt if they only knew the truth. Not saying that this particular woman's story would have been any different because it sounds like her parents potentially put it on her has her fault, but I like to think that some parents would help their kids if their kids knew what was happening before it got too bad and so very traumatizing.
That's the first thing I thought of too. Knowledge is power. Her parents left her powerless.
@kara K yes totally agree with you 1000%
Deena is a SURVIVOR. There is nothing more terrible than going to ones mother and stating that you are being molested, and they do not believe you. I'm glad when she was given the option to conform or leave, she left. Like a bird, she flew. I wish Deena happiness, good health and a long happy LIFE! MAZEL TOV,
Mary Jane Cornielle you are so right. I cannot imagine the pain she must have felt when she reached out to her mother and her mother sent her away and chose not to help her or believe her. She is a survivor!
"Treat yourself as you would treat your daughter. How would I treat my daughter?" Dear Deena, that was a beautiful thought that I will take from your video. 💛
Ruta Tzeggai it most definitely was a beautiful thought by Deena considering her own mother did not treat her the way she deserved to be treated. It shows what a beautiful spirit she has in order to know how to be kind and graceful and loving in spite of her own upbringing.
She was so honest. That was totally refreshing to hear someone talk about abuse they've suffered but not relive it at the same time.
tshalik right!? I felt the same way as you. It's such a "shameful" thing for people to talk about, but she did such a beautiful job of shedding those fears in order to help others and be an inspiration. Her bravery definitely inspired me very much.
I agree, she did so well taking care of herself. That's how you know you're healing/healed. 😉👌
“I tried to treat myself the way I would want to treat my daughter” wow that’s a perspective that’s amazing. Truly amazing
If she can survive through all that, I think I'll get through the stupid little things that I'm dealing with
I was thinking the SAME thing. She's very strong.
same
so well said. there are really no words for how amazing she is. incredible courage in the face of horrific abuse (mainly emotional/psychological as well as physical). (has nothing to do with Judaism / abuse and mismanagement of cases/children is not the practice of Judaism) - really self made, so inspiring, so moving. W.O.W
think her story makes her 10 times more beautiful...she's amazing x
same.
What a fighter. She's been dealt some of the worst situations a human can be dealt and yet she's here. Something to inspire women everywhere.
This made me cry. Her story is so sad yet probably the most inspiring thing I've seen. And though i haven't been through what she has, this shows me that i can recover. Ive had OCD all my life, but when my mom committed suicide when i was 12, I developed anorexia, body dysmorphia, social anxiety, self harm, and most recently, bipolar nos. For the past 2 years Ive been in and out of hospitals, and right now I'm trying to recover. What she said at the end about your stretch marks and scars showing the different parts of your life and who you are today was so amazing. I hate my stretch marks and scars, and that made me feel a little bit better about them. THANK YOU SO MUCH TO THIS WOMAN. You're amazing and you really did inspire me
All the best for recovery, you can do it!!
Girl, love yourself, WE ALL HAVE SCARS AND ISSUES, even those that are the most beautiful.
thewhitebengaltiger
Thanks!
Lady Ventura Thanks so much x
i´m crying too, i know, send you all my heart, hang in there and meditate, it helps, i promise
Wow, Deena, you're an amazing person! You're going to be an excellent doctor. And don't worry about your age. I started med school when I was 29, after studying two totally different things. Where I live (Israel), med school is six years, and I had to take two years off in the middle because my major depression came back. So, I'm 37 now and taking my licensing exams. Age and experience will only make you a better doctor.
+rachel langley I think there are very few people who don't feel a little lost at the age of 19 ;0). From the age of 18 I: got a BA in Africana Studies and
Jewish Civilization, moved to a new country and became fluent in the language, served in the air force, got a Practical Engineering degree in Sound, worked in stores, was in relationships and was single, lost friends and gained friends, raised gerbils and lovebirds, was majorly depressed and was OK. I don't regret any of it (although I would have liked to be without the depression...). You don't always have to know where you're going. Whether you're lost or you have a destination, enjoying the journey is what's important.
+rachel langley you're welcome! Good luck to you in life!
+Deborah R Finkelman thank you! you gave me hope
+Sari Na you made me smile!
Rachel, I'm 29 and had some ups and downs in my life. But if I could give some advice to my 19 -year- old self it would be this. Whatever you're feeling, it's ok. You're not alone. Most of the people have been through it. This is the age when you're becoming a woman and an adult, and it's going to last for a few more years .The important thing is not to waste time-when I say waste time, I mean don't spend too much time hiding in your room with your computer, feeling insecure. Instead do something, do something for yourself. Spend time discovering who you are by doing things that interest you. Be consistent and don't be a perfectionist. And you'll be fine. (Of course, don't do stupid things, but if it happens, just move forward. Don't dwell on it.)
Thanks for your honesty, Deena.. I am Jewish and cannot stand the hypocrisy and double standards of some orthodox individuals.
The human spirit can really take so much..... this is the first time I've heard a story that feels so familiar to my own but which takes my breath away because hearing it from another person who I can objectively see has done nothing wrong to deserve this makes me breathe a sigh of relief... happy healing everyone
We have so much in common and I'm glad you've found healing too. I'm Jewish and survived childhood sexual abuse and ended up within an eating disorder too. I was in and out of hospitals for 15 years but was finally able to recover. It is been over 15 years. Right now I'm dealing with the toughest traumas but I am healing from that too. I wish you much joy in your life. What was meant to harm is now helping others to heal. May it continue to be so.
This video in particular reminds me of a quote: "We are all just spirits having a human experience."
Our society makes it so hard to be kind to both our bodies and our spirits. So, we work on it daily, sometimes minute by minute. Thanks for helping to change the focus and narrative!!!
I just turned 25.
I have almost no work experience and live off my mom's money, which i am very ashamed of.
I experienced different kinds of abuse as a teenager, including sexual abuse and i was kicked out by my stepmother.
I didn't finish school, because i suffered from depression and BPD
I was homeless for a while.
I used to selfharm and self medicate, i used to hate myself, i was suicidal for the longest time, but i am still here.
I have done years and years of therapy and am still on it, i got to know myself, i have hobbies and interests now and am basically not dead inside anymore
I still have some anxiety and ptsd, but i'm doing traumatherapy and am getting better.
I am talking classes again and will hoepfully be able to finally go to university next year.
I still often times feel like i am not good enough, cause i dont work but listening to the woman in the video makes me feel so proud of her and by that also of me, because I see myself in her. Thanks for this video
Brave brave Being. What an Inspiration. Thank you for sharing, Deena. Blessing your Journey of Healing
And you survived it all Deena. Kudos to you sister. Kudos to you.
This story is riveting. You've come a long way than I could ever imagine a person would go through. I wish you the best of luck in medical school.
What a humble, inspiring beauty, give this woman another 13 minutes x
It's a weird experience, I sometimes see so much of my self in these stories. It's emotional and cathartic.
I felt so much for her. To be shamed and reabused so much for a trauma...
Bless her.
All I wanna do is hug this woman. Mazal tov Deena!! Whatever you decide to do, the world is a better place with you in it!
her story is so touching :( what an inspiring human being
um no?
What the hell is wrong with you?
When she said she was valedictorian my jaw dropped! What an amazing story of resilience and being able to turn your life around no matter what the circumstance! Great for her to be able to share her story with the world and keep moving forward even more.
Catherine Murphy זז׳
An interview of astounding profundity.Deena Chanowitz is a remarkable human being.
This woman's strength blows me away.
These stories regarding the dysfunctional interaction with parents, not being able to connect with the adults that raised you are so relatable, it's interesting how much of us have grown up with a messed up and unsupportive childhood/youth
Men have all the control but they're not trusted with seeing woman's ankles, if men are so out of control of their sexuality why are they in charge? This girl have been so let down by everyone, I'm furious for her.
Eating disorders are rarely about the food and it sounds like it was all this unit cared about, this poor woman needed someone to talk to.
I so love your logic!!!
You are a true inspiration to anyone who feels that life's just too bad for things to look up. They can look up, they do look up and somewhere along the line they will get better. Even if it's just a little bit.
''I started treating myself like I was my own daughter'' WOW!!!!!!! What a wisdom:)
She is so strong, my lord. It's people like her who really inspire to work hard and be the best you can be when you feel like you're going through a lot of tough shit. I like this woman. Amazing.
Wow what an amazing story and a beautiful person. I like the Idea of treating yourself like you would treat your daughter its a great way to show yourself some love.
I am so sorry for your pain. Please never give up you are a very beautiful young woman, and you deserve to be happy. Peace Love and Happiness.
this is one of the videos in this channel that has hit me the hardest. I keep coming back to hear the wisdom and get inspired to move on and keep going.
The healing that she has worked towards for herself will be multiplied tenfold in the healing she provides others. What a heartbreaking and beautiful story. I wish you all the best Deena!
Wow.
Her story is a testament to the resilience of ones own precious spirit, so glad she found her way out.
I'm actually quite impressed that she can sit cross legged on a stool
darganx alot of ppl sexually abused sit like that..fact
why?
@@Geo98719 ????nonsense
@@judyneville616 they hold their legs with their hands = defense from what they have been through
This is such an important and powerful interview, full of honesty, detail and transparency. Brave, Strong, Intelligent, Determined.
such a strong woman, such a moving story
Feeling moved so deeply by the openness of your share. I’ve been feeling really low, and your bravery feels contagious. You’re reminding me, what it’s like to not give up. Thank you for sharing. I’m so grateful.
I think this is the most powerful video of the series for me, hands down. Thank you for making this series.
You are an intricately, beautifully woven tapestry. So glad that all your desires are being fulfilled .
Blessings fill your cup 🕯
I am amazed at the strength that this beautiful lady has. It leaves me completely petrified just the thought of everything she went through , I feel I probably would not have been strong to get up and survive her experiences. Congratulations, you are beautiful and truly a woman that deserves admiration. Keep going and inspire more women!
I could listen to her talk forever... Such an amazing story
This lady has my full respect for being a survivor and learning to live life, on her terms.
This is one of the best things I had the honour to listen and watch in my entire life. I wish I had even a tiny bit of your persistence, her courage and her strenght...you are truly beautiful in every way!
Continue to love your self and to be your own daughter, you're doing amazing 💜
I found while watching this video that I would spontaneously be overcome with emotion and my chest would heave out a sob. You are so resilient, Deena. All the best
this was so beautiful. i'm completely in awe of her strength and persistence, really just wow!!
Such a brave and strong woman! So awesome of you to share your story!
Very moving! Thank you for sharing your struggle and continued movement toward wholeness! Peace.
This took my breath away. She is the most inspiring human ever. This changed my life.
This broke my heart. I am so touched by your journey. You are amazing.
Such courage to share this horrific abuse. So, sad to hear your abuse only continued - thankful you are alive and strong! You are a true warrior!
What a journey it sounds like you've been on, Deena. A very powerful story and woman it seems; I love what you said about your scars and body being kind of like a tribute to different parts of your life. I'm so moved by your story.
Wooow! I am speechless....
What a strong person! After all that hard hard time, standing here stronger than ever!
Thank you for sharing ❤
Thank you for still being, Deena.
What a truly beautiful young lady.
How could her mum not believe her?
Wow. Such a powerful story of recovery. Yes, Deena, you truly are a miracle!
This is one of those moments that time stops. Her story has defined true struggle and agony. I loved this and maybe one day I hope to inspire people with my story. Absolutely BEAUTIFUL and STUNNING!
Thanks for sharing your inspirational story, Deena!
This is amazing! Thank you Deena! So proud of you!
This is absolutely insane. You are a phenomenally strong woman. People like you make me proud to be human
What an amazing and strong person! Thank you for sharing your story.
No person should go through such things. I am sorry you did. And, I applaud your courage to share your remarkable story in such detail. I hope to only hear good news from now on.
Her beauty brought me to tears.
This is so massivly inspiring! Thank you so much for sharing!
What an amazing human being! Thank you so much for sharing this.
😢I'm sorry for all the horrible things you've been through 💔 but your a lot stronger then you think. And you seem to be better today and I hope it stays that way for you. Sending love and respect your way✊️
This was such an amazing story. Just wow.. I'm speechless really.
This is by far my favorite of the series. Amazing.
this helped me so much! I have an eating disorder, well actually I'm "recovered" but I often have these thoughts tat food is something I need to prove my discipline at and when she said "food is there to nourish us" and "I treat myself like my own daughter" I nearly cried cuz she's so right and I'm always gonna keep these words in my mind so when I'm thinking about starving myself again, I remember this and love and treat myself :)
Much love to her. This is so touching and brave and beautiful
Thank you for sharing your story Deena. You will make an excellent doctor and LOTS of people start medical school a little later than the conventional age group of 22-25. Because of your experiences you will LOVE medical school and you will LOVE your patients. Keep going!
What a fighter. Hearing Deena's story was heartbreaking but seeing how she turned her life around is an inspiration and should remind us all that we can achieve anything in this life. Wish her lots of happiness and good health.
That was a very inspiring Deena, you are an amazing individual. You know they say only certain people in history will ever truly achieved a level of greatness, but you my dear I feel happen to be one of them. I am so happy to have found this link. I am a father of two teenage girls and always worry that this world will chew and spit them out. I am a pediatric nurse, single parent and a proud supporter of human rights. The line needs to be drawn here!
She's been through so much. I'm so happy she's in a better place now.
Deena, you have truly overcome a lot! You are beautiful inside & out. Thanks for being such an inspiration
I was softly crying from half way through this…. I wanted to hold you the hurt child and you the hurting adult in my arms and tell you how worthy of love you have always been because of how beautiful your soul is, then I pondered what an amazing old wise soul you truly must be anyway… and when you said Deena that you eventually thought about taking care of yourself like you would your own daughter I knew you were safe…The love we have for our children, well for many, is totally none judgmental and totally unconditional and our job on this earth with all the unbelievable, hideous events to dissuade us IS to love ourselves as you would love your child… unconditionally and none judgmentally… incredible story of fortitude and so loving and courages to share your journey so far with us all. Namaste Deena and deep deep respect and love
wow, of all the stories on here, i think hers is my favorite. What an incredible journey and an incredible woman.
this is such a powerful life journey, and such a strong human being! thank you
I needed to hear this today. Thank you for sharing.
what a beautiful person, inside and out.
You're a stranger to me but I genuinely care about you. I wish none of those things happened in your life but then you wouldn't be the beautiful inspiration that you are today. Thank you for sharing ♡
That made me cry. So beautiful.
Another absolutely fascinating life story, thank goodness this lovely woman has survived & is thriving, thanks ladies for your inspiring channel. 🥰🙏
This was super interesting and inspiring. Really enjoyed listening to this woman's story! So raw
So honest. You’re such a beautiful soul
This is such an incredible story - what an absolutely amazing resilient woman ❤️
What a story of courage and the power of the human spirit!!! Godspeed Deena!
She is an incredible being. She deserves all the love and goodness the world can provide her.
So grateful for her and her story
I'm so inspired by Deena. Thank you for being so amazing, thank you for bring you
I am so inspired by this. Thank you so much for sharing. I love what you said about treating yourself the way you'd treat your own daughter, we really should be kinder to ourselves. Thank you so much for having the courage to inspire us and share your story. love to you and god bless you.
What an amazing and wonderful story of triumph over horror madness and sin. Thank you for the profile in courage this woman presents.
May you always be blessed Deena! Thank you for sharing you are light and love!
Shalom,
Sarah BAHAR
Thank you for sharing this! You're amazing!