How To Be A Good Listener | Jamila Musayeva
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- Опубліковано 2 сер 2024
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#communicationskills #etiquette #jamilamusayeva #goodlistener
Hi,
I am Jamila Musayeva, an international social etiquette consultant and the author of two books "Etiquette: the least you need to know" and "Afternoon Tea Etiquette." My books are available in English language in print only. If you wish to order, please email info@jamilamusayeva.com or my website: jamilamusayeva.com/order-books
In this video, I share with you some of the best tips to help you become a better listener. In the art of conversation, listening is more important than speaking.
Or in the words of Bernard Baruch, adviser to US Presidents, Woodrow Wilson and Franklin D. Roosevelt: “Most of the successful people I’ve known are the ones who do more listening than talking.”
My Social Media:
Instagram: / jamila_musayeva
TikTok: / jamila_musayeva
Website: jamilamusayeva.com/
Email: info@jamilamusayeva.com
The etiquette of hosting guests at your home.
Noted 😊
Yes I'd love that too!
Tell them to go away
Yes, this will be such a good topic!
@@JamilaMusayeva Is there a difference when you’re hosting strangers vs friends/family?
Non-verbal
1. Smile
2. Eye contact
3. Open body posture (lean in, put body closer, no crossing hands)
4. Nodding
5. Mirroring
Verbal
1. Non-reinforcement words (eg yes, I hear you)
2. Question (Don't intrude, but clarify. Ask a follow-up question)
3. Reflection (repeating or paraphrasing)
4. Clarify (summarize)
5. Listen to the tone of the voice
Thanks for the summary 😊
Appreciate this!💞
Thankyou! At 67 how to reinvent one self?
Thank you for doing the summary
Introverts be like: we already boss in this 😎
Yes me 😂
the one of most funniest comment 😂😂
Yes I am
Not really I'm sort of introvert when tired or hungover,still CBA to listen to people's woes and rubbish stoies. Bored me!
How to answer awkward questions elegantly... please!
And also how to answer the compliment: you are beautiful
It's always so embarrassing
To “you are beautiful” I would say thank you, that’s so kind.
Seconding Arlet Bode. Smile, say thank you (to underline, I would perhaps briefly switch into the more "feminine" postures from the posture and deportment videos on this channel - if appropriate, then switch back), and get on with the situation at hand. :-)
Just tbought that in tis day and age, unfortunately, in certain situations, a comment like that would fling me in full panic mode (talking a walk in the park, not many other people nearby...) * sigh *
Accept it with grace 😊
@@JamilaMusayeva I do not want to look proud or Arrogant ..
Should I show enthusiasm for the compliment?
@@arletbode4847 I could never give such an answer if this would come from someone I don't have a romantic relationship with. But if someone would tell me, you are smart, I would exactly say this. Some comments don't need answers...
I love your voice. I would like some tips on how to soften the voice.
I agreee! ❤️
I like this too!
Yes!
On the phone, smile a little. In person, and since I know I have a "bitchy resting face", I make a point to think of happy things, or think of a cheerful song. Does wonders, judging by the feedback I get. :-) For starters, until Jamila uploads! ;-)
Coming soon on speaking manner 😊 stay tuned!
This is such an important topic. In the West our culture really is listening to respond, instead of listening to actually hear what the other person is saying. When we leave space to listen actively, we allow the speaker's train of thought to continue and finish... and then we can respond! So important to learn this skill, especially right now....Never too late to start :) Gracias Jamila
Absolutely!
I feel spotted O_o time too work💯
To listen actively without trying to think what you're going to say next, is one of the most beautiful gifts you can give to someone ✨
I also think it's so important to remember this applies not just to conversations with strangers or work colleagues we may want to 'impress', but also those that we love the most.
I think it's one of the secrets to being the most loving spouse, a sibling, a friend or a daughter/son to learn to listen in the most loving and caring way.
A beautiful video💜
Ieva I totally agree with you I'll try my best to improve this
Absolutely!
As someone with social anxiety, I find that knowing rules of social etiquette can really help mitigate stress. Part of the anxiety comes from uncertainty and not knowing how to respond to certain situations, but having a set of guidelines can really help set me at ease. Thank you for your videos!
I love how you have no adds and also listen to our recommendations i love your videos so much so educative and helpful
Thank you 🙏🏻
oh no there's people who actually what to get paid for their work, what a bad thing
People will forget what you said , people will forget what you did ,but people will never ever forget how you made them feel ✨
Well said ..
Good that you noted this quote ☺️
Non verbal gestures are truly vital in the art of communication. Such great tips and advice! 💕
Thank you! 😌
This channel is a hidden gem ❤️💎👌
Thank you 🙏🏻
Please do a video on feminine fashion, styling, hairstyles and accessories :) I love your voice it's so calm and relaxing
Thank you!
quick summary! but pls still watch the whole video to have a better understanding ☺️ thank u for this great video, you’ve helped me so much!
non-verbal
1. smile (when it’s appropriate)
2. maintain eye contact but look away sometimes (*tip: look in between their eyebrows)
3. body posture (physically bring urself closer, lean in, open body posture = no crossing ur arms)
4. position of ur head (slant head and bring ur head closer/ rest ur head on ur hand)
5. nod according to what they say
6. mirroring (reflection of the person’s body posture when u r listening)
verbal
1. positive reinforcements (yes, right, i feel you/hear you/i know what you mean)
2. follow up questions (has to flow)
3. reflection (repeating what the speaker has said in your own words & what you think they must feel)
4. clarification (open ended qns)
5. summarisation (brief summary + open ended qns at the end)
6. listen to the tone of the voice (not just the words)
**people love conversations when they talk the most - wanna be a good conversationalist? be a good listener.
Thanks for the summary!
I would definitely listen attentively to someone like you !! Very eloquent and classy
Thank you!
It shows how powerful gentle manners are!! It draws people in.😉
the quality of this video is absolutely incredible!
Thank you!
I love how you address both the genders in each of your videos ❤️
Hello everyone here🤗🤗
Wish you all good luck for your life as we all are here for positive change in our lives😇
Absolutely 😊
I can listen to you the all day long thank u ma'am
I'd love to watch a video on how to "control" your face when expressing emotions.. Sometimes I feel like people (myself included) end up making ugly faces when expressing emotions of confusion/surprise etc. How can we control our face's emotions without being too plain?
Noted 😊
Pull a poker face! its the best for any situation
I wanna know the same
@@JamilaMusayeva Yes! I would love a video on this, you always look so serene on camera. It took me until I was in University in the US to hear that my "thinking/processing" face was interpreted as judgemental or critical. Still working on moderating my other expressions (I'll get wrinkles early hahahaha)
I don't think expressing your emotions without control is bad, Anne, in fact, I think it feels more 'authentic' and can bring your closer to other people! If you feel anxious about not looking 'good', this may even be a good thing because people form friendships by vulnerability. =)
I love listening to you because of your soothe calming voice , It really calms me . Thanks a lot for teaching me how to be a good listener .
Thank you!
second yay love you so much . i have noticed such a good chnage in myself after following you
I definitely see where you are coming from. Watching her makes you want to be a better person.
@@CelineRockIt thank you you’re saying the truth hope you are safe and happy 😃
Hi Jamila,
Can we get a video on Wardrobe essentials? Like the basic things, every woman must have in their wardrobe.
I clicked as soon as I got the notfication. I'm so glad I found this channel!! I feel so good about myself these days. Thank you so much!
Thank you 🙏🏻 happy to hear that!
You're a wonderful role model. Thank you 😊
Thank you!
@@JamilaMusayeva thank you too. The education and the right manners are the base for a good society,and so many people should follow your advice, especially if a youg girl/woman would become a real lady like you. So thank you very much. 🙏🏻💜 I'm a big fan of yours and of your work.
Hai, I am a new subscriber. Please do a video on how to speak calmly and at the same time be assertive. Thank you.❤️
What a great idea for a video
Good!
Thank you! Coming soon ☺️
@@JamilaMusayeva ❤️
Thank you Jamila for actually providing good quality content for free.
As someone with social anxiety, doing this is really hard but I think this would be good practice for me to do with my family so I really appreciate these tips!
You are welcome. It takes practice to become good at it ☺️
Dating Etiquettes. Loved your explanation. Sharing to loved ones. Thank you.
I love the way you speak..
I am changing!🤍
Thank you 🙏🏻
I want a heart from you PLEASE :)
❤️
I love your videos, please highlight the major point in the description that explain the video content
You have taught me a lot,thankyou
Her voice is soooo soothing I really wanna be soft and gentle like her!!
Wow, your voice so soft and even you also replying all of these comments ✨
Thank, it was helpful
This was actually one of my resolutions for this year! Great tips as always 😊💕
Thank you!
Even if i don't have time to watch, I'm saving your videos to come back again, you're so precious🙏😊 Greetings from Turkey🇹🇷
Never clicked on a video faster 💜
❤️🙏🏻
Love your content, Jamila. Thank you for uploading!
Thanks!
Oh my goodness! So elegant,classy,calm😍 worthy of my time, definitely u deserve more subscribers 👍
Thank you very much!
Thank you for sharing. This is so needed.
I'm so glad that I found your channel, I'm liking your videos so much
Thank you so so much❤️
Omg I'm early!!! Tysm for uploading Mrs. Jamila.😊 I love your content and your personality. ♡ I aspire to know as much as you in etiquette. Please don't stop teaching us!
Thank you 🙏🏻
Honestly you've inspired ..
Thanks for the amazing advice
You are a good instructor. Very clear. Thanks dearie 🌸
I liked it. 👍 Could you make a video about "job interview" ethics or office ethics?
Good idea 😉
Office ethics, I think its very important nowadays. The relationship with our boss
@@buku8627 And now that we are working from home. Zoom call ethics.
@@JamilaMusayeva And if you come around to this particular subject, please include work at home/video meeting ethics. I have a lot of difficulty translating distinctive office ethics onto a video call.
Wow,this is also what I want
Woww i just love yor speaking style and the way you're moving hands, n the vocabs!
Thank you!
Wow, you are really amazing! The quality of your videos are so high. I really appreciate the work you do for us! In todays world where social connections get shallower it's very important to be a good listener!
Thank you 😊
hey queen you dropped this 👑
Wow, you grew so much in just a few weeks! I've been here before 10k and now you're over 100k. Congratulations Jamila! These tips really help a lot of people be the polished and sophisticated person they aspire to be. 😊
I know I am surprised too ☺️
Love your channel, thank you! ❤️
I love your channel . So useful for people nowadays . 🎉
I’m so happy I found your channel.
Thanks 🙏🏻
I am so glad that I'm exactly how you taught us to be in this video. I've been told previously that I'm a good listener. And I'm unconsciously doing all the things which you are teaching here. And as you were teaching I was even trying to do as you were showing and realised I do those things a lot in general conversations with people. I think people who are naturally introverted have some qualities of being good listeners.
I agree 😊
Your videos are not only very informative but very relaxing. Great content, thank you.
Thank you!
I often get time to watch UA-cam at night & past few months are quite rough for me, so I feel difficulty in sleeping these days.. One fine night, I came across your channel!! I don't know how much etiquettes I have learned yet but your voice definitely acts as a lullaby to me!! Listening to you really calms my mind 😇
Plz share a video on how to speak politely.. Hoping to see more from you ☺
I'm so lucky that I found ur channel ☺️. Your talking style is just impressive and I learnt many things. Love from India ❤️
Thank you!
Why are these videos so damn relaxing?!
I also like the background music, thank you dear Jamila, this video was very useful like always.
You are welcome ☺️
Thank you for sharing Jamila. Much appreciated ☺️
You are welcome 😊
I turn on the notification 💛 so i never miss your much needful vids..
Thank you ❤️
i like the way you talk, most espicially the way you speech i will remember my teacher in high school and my college day
I think I can become " a good listener " by just watching your videos and listening your voice
Best channel on youtube. Etiquette should be taught in school, particularly for women.
Thank you for this video. and congratulations for the subscribers. You went from 27k last month to 200k subscribers!
I love this topic! I know that I have to work on this because I felt like I gave all of my listening skills previously to those that weren't great conversationalists. Changing that would align closer to who I really am again.
I would love to see a video topic on how to have proper etiquette in leaving a conversation, avoiding conversations that are overly draining and signs to the listener on when to withdraw from a potentially draining conversation without seeming rude or harsh.
Noted😊
Loving your channel ❤️
Looking forward to many more videos on etiquette!
Thank you!
I always come back to this video because it’s such an important skill to have. Thank you Jamila for this gem!
Thank you 🙏🏻
I love this video. it helped me a lot. And for that reason I thank you.
I would like you to make a video of using voice tones in different places. how to use it etc...i think it is really important, and how it effects it with talking to people.
btw i love your video:)
I have been taking your advice and looking at the middle of the eyes. It makes it so much easier to keep eye contact, something that was impossible for me. Thank you 🙏🏼
I am happy to hear it 😊
i needed this.
😊
So many amazing tips!! Thank you so much 😊 I really love your videos 💕
Happy to hear it!
When i feel that the other person is listening actively to what i am saying i feel so happy it boost your self esteem that what you re saying is worthy to be listened even if the topic is not special
Thank youu for the video ❤❤
You are welcome
I just love & enjoy all of your videos ❤️ it's very informative and your voice is soothing 😘 lots of love 🥰
Thank you!
Your all videos are very much brilliant and I love your post on Dinning Etiquette a lot 🥀 You are so softly teaching us Thank you so much ❤️ love from India 🇮🇳
Thank you so much! Since I have known your youtube channel, my life was totally change
So happy to hear that! You are welcome!
when i listen you i hear both the sound of silence and your smooth voice at the same time which make me calm down. thanks for showing your experience on how to speak in all your videos.
Thank you for your kind words ☺️
I love the content of your video, it’s very useful, and l love the WAY you deliver it. But actually what I really want to comment on is how beautiful your dress is!!! It’s gorgeous! 🤩
I really appreciate the tips you shared and the topic, because I didn't know how to be a good listener and I'm learning. You're video has been really helpful :) thank you!
You are welcome 😊
Thank you so much for sharing 💗 I always learn a lot from your videos
Thank you!
Thank you so much for this, it makes sense , those tips :)
Fantastique! I’m impressed !
I found your channel yesterday and I have watched your videos with great interest. They are very helpful.
Thank you!
@@JamilaMusayeva No. Thank YOU!
totally the best channel ever
Thank you!
YOU ARE MY BEST TEACHER THANK YOU
You are very welcome!
Another superb and very informative video, thank you Jamila! You actually remind me of a celebrity and political figure from the Philippines . You look and talk like her.
Thank you so much for all this advises ❤
You are welcome ☺️
Can you share more on elegance and motherhood? I’d love to hear your thoughts on how you maintain composure and how it translates into motherhood and your dynamic with your children!
I really admire the way you communicate and I wish to thank you for your valuable content, Jamila! :))
Video suggestion - could you talk in depth on how to approach a conversation with a friend/relative/associate who might have lost a family member and tips on how to make them feel comfortable?
I really really wanted this video thank you so much
Just listening to you is comforting
Thank you 🙏🏻
I really like this vieo! In my opinion these reactiones should be basic for everyone but thank you for sharing! People must change they communication.🌸
Your videos are thoroughly informative. Thanks! This comment is probably after binge watching your uploads😊
Thank you for binge watching ☺️
Thank you so much for the video, my recommendation is etiquettes at home.
Instead of saying, we need more people who actually listens, I'm trying to be one of those people
Thank you Jamila! ❤✨
you are welcome, Liji! :)
I have seen all your videos and I love them ❤️
Thank you!
Hi Jamila, I’m so glad I found your videos. They’re lovely to watch when I have a moment of quiet. This might sound rather odd, but you are the first etiquette coach I have encountered who is also a mother! Could you possibly do a video about maintaining your grace whilst being a Mom? I find this has been the largest challenge for me, personally. Many thanks 🤍
Thank you! Noted 😊
Hi Jamila, I love watching your videos and I learn a lot of new things. I love the way you present and carry yourself. I am currently working on building my self confidence and I would love to watch a video on self confidence. I saw someone else request a video on job interviews below, I would also love to see a video on professional school interviews (medical schools, dentistry schools, optometry etc). As well as how to write a good personal statement and how to present yourself in applications to professional schools. Thank you for being a great inspiration
Thank you! Your suggestions are noted 😊
You're such an inspiration! Can you please do a video on how to act on a first date?
Thank you!
Wow.. I've been searching this kind of channel... ♥
Thank you! 🙏🏻
I love this woman
Thank you!