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What Nobody Tells You About Grief and Loss - Dr Julie
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- Опубліковано 14 сер 2024
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Hi I'm Dr. Julie subscribe & follow me for more videos on all areas of mental health and motivation.
For more on this see my new no.1 bestselling book - Why has nobody told me this before?
👉 linktr.ee/drjuliesmith
Subscribed! Cause i want to be a phycologist too.
I have a Question❗
Five years ago my beloved grandmother passed away but I never feel any pain about that.
Why is that ?🤔
I lost my nan 3 years ago but not sure if my friends want to help me move on
What should I do
My nan passed 3 years ago but I still think of her everyday but I feel like my friends feel like their unnecessary problems are more important
What should I do?
I love you julie my darling..💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💋💋💋💋💋💋💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💘💘💘💘💘💘💘
I lost my sweet husband just 4 weeks ago. The black spot of my grief is still huge. I love how you illustrated this process. It makes so much sense. I'd like to hang your painting on my wall to remind me that life goes on. ❤
I was thinking... perhaps you could draw that black spot in the middle of a blank canvas (doesn't have to be paint, can be markers or whatever else) and every time you make a new memory, maybe even one that honors him, you could add a color around the circle? Maybe write the date or event of importance in the color?
@@eden1909 That's actually a great idea. Thank you!
Sometimes it feels like the whole canvas is black...
rest in peace 🙏
im sorry for your loss
Unfortunately, the pain never really goes away... you just learn to live with the loss and grow around it. Prayers to all of you who have lost someone you love.
I lost my dad on April 2nd last year. I have never ever felt so much pain before… this made me so happy.. thank you
I’m so sorry for your loss, I hope your okay!
@@flower6458 same here 😔
💔💔
I would make a joke about having the death date be a day after April Fools, but damn.. Does it still hurt?
@@maybe_alittlebit_unhinged lmao i understand that, and it still hurts :’D
I lost my eldest daughter 11 years ago and my mother 6 months ago. This is so true. It never stops hurting, the pain never lessens but life does go on and you do find ways to cope with a reality you'd rather run away from. Wishing love and healing to everyone grieving, whether your loss was yesterday or decades ago xxx
If you look closely you can clearly see why I am a Psychologist 👩🏼⚕️ and not an Artist 👩🎨
🤣🤣🤣
Beautiful thing about art is that it doesn't have to be perfect. Art is supposed to have meaning, and your picture holds a lot of that. I think it is a beautiful piece.
Never mind, professional artists don't do it any better. Just go to a museum.
@@DieterRahm1845 Don't you dare call those filthy banana tapers "professional artists" lmaooo Van Gogh would cry in his grave hearing that and he's missing an ear 😭
Thank you, nobody in my life has really said this. Its always "things will be ok" or "just give it time". I lost my only brother 7 years ago in May and a sister last June. I needed to hear this.❤
I could really use someone like u in my life atm. I'm loosing to life an feel like I can't push forward. I also feel like I can't grieve bcz I've been threw so much in my life . Having s really hard time pushing threw :(
I just lost my sister. I miss her everyday. I can’t even journal about my feelings as it just causes so much pain. This video was helpful that one day it’ll be better.
Sorry for your loss
Yes, journaling causes so much pain.. Because we need to reminisce memories, and thoughts, and feel everything all over again while we are jotting them down.
I lost my mother about two and a half years ago (I was 13), and it does get better. It gets so much better. It’s crazy to imagine I live a life now through my teen years without my mother, but I’m doing it, and it’s proof that your heart will heal around it. You’ll never forget them, though
💕💜
It took me months to journal about the loss of my father, it’s okay
I nearly cried when watching this because it reminded me of the fact that I lost my mother 4 years ago 2 days before my birthday, also I'm still pretty young and could really need her advice sometimes, but this illustration is really nice and learning about this is quite interesting thanks❤️
@Zora Thank you❤️
I love to share my best friend's story of true hope. I pray it is a help to you.
Precious Memories-By Sonya Lakey
Family Story
Little did our family of six know that Friday evening, September 24th, 2021, would be the last night our family would be complete. We laughed together, played games, sang, and enjoyed listening as our 16-year-old son, Ethan, played the piano for us. I packed a lunch for Ethan for a church mountain hike he was going on the following day.
My mother (who was visiting from out of state) and I woke early with Ethan on Saturday morning. He hugged me and smiled, never pulling away or rushing me. He got in the car, waved, said he'd see me later and he loved me. It was hard to watch my "new driver" heading out on his own that morning. As Ethan pulled out of the gate, I turned to my mother and said, "It's just so hard letting go." Little did I know how much "letting go" I was really doing. That was the last time I saw Ethan. He did not make it home that evening.
That afternoon, a friend tried to contact my husband, leaving an urgent message to call him back. He tried several times to return the call to no avail. As we were preparing supper, an overwhelming feeling of deep concern for Ethan filled my heart. I quietly blinked back tears. I glanced out the window, half expecting to see a police officer pull up to the house, but no one arrived. However, within a few minutes, a patrol car DID pull into the driveway. In my heart, I feared the worst. My husband and I went out to meet the officer, who confirmed our fears. Hesitantly, he told us our son had fallen off of
a bluff and had succumbed to his injuries. Our hearts were crushed; they still are.
Yet, in all of our brokenness, deep, continual grief and loneliness, our family has such a blessed Hope and assurance that we will see our dear son and brother again. You see, when Ethan was a young boy, he was saved; he put his faith in Jesus alone to forgive his sins and to take him to Heaven when he died. He realized some very important truths from the Bible that he would want to share with you.
His Story
Everyone is a sinner. Sin is any violation of God’s Law. God is holy, just and righteous, and He cannot allow sin in His presence. Ethan realized that he - like all of us - had sinned; and his sin separated Him from God.
“For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God; ” (Romans 3:23)
“Wherefore, as by one man sin entered into the world, and death by sin; and so death passed upon all men, for that all have sinned:” (Romans 5:12)
He understood that, because of his sin, he deserved to spend eternity in Hell.
“For the wages of sin is death;” (Romans 6:23a) [Wages: price]
“But the fearful, and unbelieving, and the abominable, and murderers, and whoremongers, and sorcerers, and idolaters, and all liars, shall have their part in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone: which is the second death.” (Revelation 21:8)
Ethan believed that Jesus, God’s Son, paid the price for all sin when He died on the cross - because His sinless sacrifice was the only thing that could satisfy the just demands of a righteous, holy God. Jesus was buried in a borrowed tomb, but He arose the third day, triumphant over sin, death, and Hell. Jesus is alive today!
“For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.” (John 3:16)
“For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God: Not of works, lest any man should boast.” (Ephesians 2:8-9)
Ethan was sorry for his sin, repented (turned), and received by faith the free gift that God offered to him.
“For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved.” (Romans 10:13)
“...but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord.” (Romans 6:23b)
Because of this great salvation, Ethan lived his life serving Jesus. He worked hard to spread this Good News to the world. He is alive in Heaven with Jesus today; and because of this great HOPE in Christ, we know we will see him again soon - not because he was a great kid, but because of his faith in the great Saviour!
“And I give unto them eternal life; and they shall never perish, neither shall any man pluck them out of my hand.” (John 10:28)
Your Story
What about you? What if you had fallen to your death that day - What if you were to die today? Where will you spend eternity - Heaven or the Lake of Fire? There will not be any parties in the Lake of Fire. It is a place of eternal torment for those who reject God's Son.
The Word of God is very clear that there is only One Way to Heaven.
“Jesus saith unto him, I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me.” (John 14:6)
We did not know that Ethan would step into eternity that day; however, because he put his faith in Jesus alone for his salvation, Ethan was ready to go. Some day - perhaps today - you will take your last breath here on earth, and you will step into eternity. Where you spend eternity is determined by what you do with Jesus Christ. Will you accept Him or reject Him? You are not promised another day or another breath. Eternity begins soon - Are you ready?
“...Believe on the Lord Jesus Christ, and thou shalt be saved…” (Acts 16:31b)
“For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved.” (Romans 10:13)
“(...behold, now is the day of salvation.)” (2 Corinthians 6:2c)
******************************
This testimony has been made into a tract form as well, so if you or your church are interested in having them to pass out, please go to libertyfaith.net and you will find the contact info there. God bless!
Tribute to Ethan Lakey
ua-cam.com/video/EhobcQZ6Qb8/v-deo.html
Hi Diana, my mom passed away 4 years ago as well, 5 days after my birthday. The day she pass I was with her and saw when she took her last breath. Losing a mom is devastating for most people no matter how old you are. I've experience all these emotions she's talking about, the pain never goes away but you learn to cope and continue with your life. I'm so sorry that this happened to you hon. I will pray for you 🙏🏼 ❤
@@peitrab4121 Thanks
@@Diana-bk5vp you are most welcome
My dad just died last month and this made me cry. Thank you
❤
❤ for you.
This is something I needed to hear. The whole pandemic it just feels as if I’ve been losing everyone I love. My grandma, then my dog, my dad, and then my other dog most recently. Each time it’s hard to get over it.
One thing about these terrible losses.
Someday, when you are stronger, you will have empathy and experience, strength, and hope to share with others as they travel through their own experiences with loss and grief.
Love is all around us, and you will spread more of it again one day too.💜☮️
I am so sorry for your losses. You will be happy again
I lost my mom & my furybaby in 2020
I really hated that year
For me it was my grandma. We actually got two dogs not loose them. But if you ever heard of Meanwhile In Memphis the documentary, the person who filmed that was my grandma.
I lost my guinea pig this past Friday.....his name was Kona and he lived for 6 years and 5 months. He was my baby.....he was smart, and sweet, but tough and headstrong, and silly, but also a momma's boy....and I was his momma. I miss him everyday. Losing anyone you love, human or otherwise is so incredibly painful, and it gets even harder the closer you are to them. Unfortunately grief and loss is the
price of love.
This is beautiful. I lost my mom almost 9 years ago and I still have moments where it feels like I can't breathe when I think of her. Thank you for this video.
I'm so sorry for your loss, you're so strong
Same here😰
I also lost my mom
May she rest in peace
@@itstuertle8047 I feel bad for both of u :(
The fact that I realized that this is actually how it works makes me feel a lot better about it
This made me tear up, I lost my dad when I was 22, I'm 25 now and the grief is still heavy in my heart 🥺 thank you for showing a visual example
I love to share my best friend's story of true hope. I pray it is a help to you.
Precious Memories-By Sonya Lakey
Family Story
Little did our family of six know that Friday evening, September 24th, 2021, would be the last night our family would be complete. We laughed together, played games, sang, and enjoyed listening as our 16-year-old son, Ethan, played the piano for us. I packed a lunch for Ethan for a church mountain hike he was going on the following day.
My mother (who was visiting from out of state) and I woke early with Ethan on Saturday morning. He hugged me and smiled, never pulling away or rushing me. He got in the car, waved, said he'd see me later and he loved me. It was hard to watch my "new driver" heading out on his own that morning. As Ethan pulled out of the gate, I turned to my mother and said, "It's just so hard letting go." Little did I know how much "letting go" I was really doing. That was the last time I saw Ethan. He did not make it home that evening.
That afternoon, a friend tried to contact my husband, leaving an urgent message to call him back. He tried several times to return the call to no avail. As we were preparing supper, an overwhelming feeling of deep concern for Ethan filled my heart. I quietly blinked back tears. I glanced out the window, half expecting to see a police officer pull up to the house, but no one arrived. However, within a few minutes, a patrol car DID pull into the driveway. In my heart, I feared the worst. My husband and I went out to meet the officer, who confirmed our fears. Hesitantly, he told us our son had fallen off of
a bluff and had succumbed to his injuries. Our hearts were crushed; they still are.
Yet, in all of our brokenness, deep, continual grief and loneliness, our family has such a blessed Hope and assurance that we will see our dear son and brother again. You see, when Ethan was a young boy, he was saved; he put his faith in Jesus alone to forgive his sins and to take him to Heaven when he died. He realized some very important truths from the Bible that he would want to share with you.
His Story
Everyone is a sinner. Sin is any violation of God’s Law. God is holy, just and righteous, and He cannot allow sin in His presence. Ethan realized that he - like all of us - had sinned; and his sin separated Him from God.
“For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God; ” (Romans 3:23)
“Wherefore, as by one man sin entered into the world, and death by sin; and so death passed upon all men, for that all have sinned:” (Romans 5:12)
He understood that, because of his sin, he deserved to spend eternity in Hell.
“For the wages of sin is death;” (Romans 6:23a) [Wages: price]
“But the fearful, and unbelieving, and the abominable, and murderers, and whoremongers, and sorcerers, and idolaters, and all liars, shall have their part in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone: which is the second death.” (Revelation 21:8)
Ethan believed that Jesus, God’s Son, paid the price for all sin when He died on the cross - because His sinless sacrifice was the only thing that could satisfy the just demands of a righteous, holy God. Jesus was buried in a borrowed tomb, but He arose the third day, triumphant over sin, death, and Hell. Jesus is alive today!
“For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.” (John 3:16)
“For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God: Not of works, lest any man should boast.” (Ephesians 2:8-9)
Ethan was sorry for his sin, repented (turned), and received by faith the free gift that God offered to him.
“For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved.” (Romans 10:13)
“...but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord.” (Romans 6:23b)
Because of this great salvation, Ethan lived his life serving Jesus. He worked hard to spread this Good News to the world. He is alive in Heaven with Jesus today; and because of this great HOPE in Christ, we know we will see him again soon - not because he was a great kid, but because of his faith in the great Saviour!
“And I give unto them eternal life; and they shall never perish, neither shall any man pluck them out of my hand.” (John 10:28)
Your Story
What about you? What if you had fallen to your death that day - What if you were to die today? Where will you spend eternity - Heaven or the Lake of Fire? There will not be any parties in the Lake of Fire. It is a place of eternal torment for those who reject God's Son.
The Word of God is very clear that there is only One Way to Heaven.
“Jesus saith unto him, I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me.” (John 14:6)
We did not know that Ethan would step into eternity that day; however, because he put his faith in Jesus alone for his salvation, Ethan was ready to go. Some day - perhaps today - you will take your last breath here on earth, and you will step into eternity. Where you spend eternity is determined by what you do with Jesus Christ. Will you accept Him or reject Him? You are not promised another day or another breath. Eternity begins soon - Are you ready?
“...Believe on the Lord Jesus Christ, and thou shalt be saved…” (Acts 16:31b)
“For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved.” (Romans 10:13)
“(...behold, now is the day of salvation.)” (2 Corinthians 6:2c)
******************************
This testimony has been made into a tract form as well, so if you or your church are interested in having them to pass out, please go to libertyfaith.net and you will find the contact info there. God bless!
Tribute to Ethan Lakey
ua-cam.com/video/EhobcQZ6Qb8/v-deo.html
I lost mine when I was 8 years old a week before Christmas in 2016.
It does not affect me much now, I hope you will heal from the pain of that loss. Life sucks sometimes...
Make the best of it.
I lost my dad 9 months ago, I'm 24. I still feel like it was all just a bad dream that at any moment I can just hear him call my name. I miss him so much. I have never felt such deep pain before.
This is the best description and visualization of the grieving process I've ever seen. Thank you!🎨
Thank you for the kind words!
Thank you for not saying that the grief "fades" as I've heard (and seen in books on grief) so often. It's been 17 years this year since I lost my little brother and I *still* get that terrible stab of grief, that's just a sharp now as it was then. I've never get over his loss and was feeling like I must be doing something wrong for it to still affect me as it does.
Some pains never go away. You just have to learn to live with it. Your brother must have been the most beautiful existence in your life. So its natural for you to still be in grief. Just think of it thos way. He might be i a beautiful place right now. The possibilities arr endless. Dont just think about that he is not alive anhmore. Think more how he existed once and was a important part of your life. And one day you will meet him on some other world. Its too philosophical but it might be true
In my humble opinion, you must be a very special person who loves with passion, respect and admiration. It is an endearing yet tumultuous time which endures yet blossoms like a silver lilac rose bush with each year which passes.When my father passed away, I planted 17 miniature rose bushes in his honour. His passion was gardening and he instilled in me an extraordinary love for rose gardens.This grief transformed into generational love with spiritual significance. I hope this helps in a meaningful way.Blessings.
@@simonedevlin7710 This is beautiful. Was there a significance in planting 17 rose bushes (instead of, say 16 or 25).
May his soul rest in heaven 🙏🏻✝️ may God be with you! and bless you with comfort, peace and joy! Your little brother is in a better place with no pain
How are you doing now?
It’s been half as long as that since I lost my grandmother, I still tear up like a baby thinking about her and her dog.
It hurts. But with time it gets easier to handle and drags me down less
Im in the process of losing my mother and i really needed this. Thank you.
I have lost my little brother almost 5 years ago, after 15 years of fighting a rare illness and defeating all odds. Now I am a mother to a beautiful 4 months old baby girl and this made me cry so much because it is so deeply true ❤️
This is such a beautiful way of identifying how we heal…& move forward 🌻
@💖cauallacozy🌸 you get sad..... Are you diffetent from the sadness....?
@💖cauallacozy🌸 but when the sadness itself is there are you different from it...
Let's say you want a baby but can't conceive.... You go to a cafe and see mothers with babies.... You see thoughts and images of you with a baby but this cannot come true... And so you feel sad which is possibly a bodily sensation and then you might say I want a baby and can't and then you have more thoughts about not being able to have a baby and you might say you feel sad.... So being sad is all that internal talk and thoughts and images.... And this is what you are right...? You.... The person.. Whoever you are are all that you are those sensations and those thoughts and images... You are that sadness...
Our problem is that we think we are a person orher than that sadness.... We say "I am sad" as though there is an "I" that is sad and so that sadness persists because we've separated ourselves from it.
In a kids film about emotions they decide at some point in the film to "sit with sadness". If we sit with sadness we might find there is no such thing.
@💖cauallacozy🌸 will take a look :)
Thank you
I watched this video before losing someone and some weeks later lost my cat, I was very sad about this and people just told me that "it's just a cat, no one cares" this offended me because my cat was like an older sister to me and losing her meant a lot.
I just want to say that if you ever lost someone, anyone, important to you, I'm so sorry and I hope you'll get over it soon :))
Sometimes your feline friends (or any pet pal) are some of the best companions and form some of the strongest bonds. So those losses can be just as great.
My point is, I'm so sorry someone said that to you regarding your kitty. Their life was just as meaningful as any other life.
I'm sorry you've suffered so much loss. The very best of wishes in your healing process and in life!!
That is offensive. Grief comes from love and you obviously loved your cat. I'm sorry for your loss.
I lost my cat too. I still miss him. Don't let anyone put you down because everyone has a different way of dealing with these things
Same. I lost my cat yesterday and she’s been here for my whole life. It hurts so much
I lost a few cats and i feel your pain. I kept hearing the usual ‘It is just a cat, and you have other cats’. Yes just cats, life companions, live day by day, who receive love gracefully and give unconditional love. Humans need to learn more from these ‘just cats’.
Though they are no longer here with me, and the grief remains, these missing ones and their memory will stay in my heart ❤️
I needed that, its midnight I can't sleep, googling "How to cope with grief" I miss my husband so much, he died suddenly 4 weeks ago in he's sleep, I was out the country with work, the next time I saw him was at he's funeral, I was due back a few days later, we'd just spoken before that same night, my Son found him in the morning. My hurt is aching, I feel physically sick, 30 years of marriage, suddenly I have no one to text, call, soundboard, hug, kiss, cuddle 😢 trying to ve strong for my kids and family as we're all grieving, it's so hard, I've even brought a pregnancy full size pillow so the bed doesn't feel so empty, right now all I feel is the black circle, I hope I can move on
I lost my best friend when I was ten from a car accident. It's been 7 years, and I still cry sometimes thinking about her. She was my favorite person. I wish she was still around.
My father passed away when I was 14 and I thought my life has been completely messed up, but when I saw your video, it made me feel better that I'm still able to create meaningful life despite the grief that I'm going through. Thank you so much!
I hope you are doing well and I wish you to do well on your life, love you💜
She made me feel better also
Same happened to me , wish that your father rest in peace , yes , despite all the pain that will never disappear u just learn to live yr life with it
I'm in the exact same situation, it is terrible. But there are a few days were I laugh and I live just for these days.
Same, I was 18 and he passed when I needed him most.. thought I'd never get over it, and it was a rough transition but with friends and family you keep moving on and living. Cheers💛
My dog died 3 days ago I have been crying every night I can’t get to sleep that’s why I subscribe (thank you for the support)
I'm so sorry for your loss, you got this, stay strong
I’m so sorry for you, I have a friend that lost her dog a few months ago. I couldn’t imagine losing me dog. May they Rest In Peace :)
This comment made me cry so much I was the same age as my dog and spent my whole life with her. She died the on the first of January this year, i still cry about her a lot but I promise you it gets easier. I still have hard times but this video tells the truth. I miss her so much. Just remember that both of our dogs are in a better place, may they Rest In Peace ❤️
I lost my dog brother on December 29th 2020 and it broke me into a million pieces but now after more then a year of grief I am slowly beginning to move on and live my life I loved him more then anything and losing a dog is like losing a sibling or child to the right people At the end of may we might get a Great Pyrenees which we think my dog brother may have had in him
He was a shelter dog and was a golden retriever Saint Bernard maybe some Great Pyrenees in there and he lived to be 15 and I have another shelter dog who in may will be 6 she is my dog baby I just hope she accepts the Great Pyrenees
I'm so sorry for your loss. I lost my dog, too. This year on 21st of march. I really miss him but I hope you will be able to recover from this soon. I hope your little baby is in a safe place where no one can hurt it. Sending love
And oh is that your doggy in your profile picture? It is really cute :(( 💜
Grieving is one thing, having to grieve, and know you are the only one in the family who can care for my Mother, helping her shower, eat, have laundry and meals. I have autoimmune disease and I love 💖 my life I have it's brilliant! But l'm also grieving my freedom ❗😞🙏🏻🕊️God help me and bring me strength!
I like to think of it as the loss of someone you love, leaving a hole in your heart, but instead of fully healing as the pain gets easier to manage, it just scars over, leaving a permanent mark on your heart and soul.
I lost my mum 15 years ago this week..... This is very true..... Some days I still cry over losing my beautiful mum.... I have good days, great days in fact, but the pain is still there..... Its doesn't get diminished, I still miss her so damn much, its just that my life is bigger now 💛
I lost my mom too and it has been 6 months and I feel like I will never get over it
@@ihatecramps9929 I am so so sorry for your loss and what you're going through..... I wish I had words of wisdom about how its gonna get easier etc.... But my only advice is to figure out who your support system is, if you haven't already, and allow yourself to lean on them for support when you need it.... In the same way you'd let them lean on you if the tables were turned..... And don't feel guilty for smiling or having a good day.... Your mum would absolutely want you to have good days 💛 good vibes coming your way
"What is grief, if not love perservering?"
-Vision
don’t do that to me, dude
tears
And from marvel
Ah yes, I remember that, that always makes me cry.
AHH YAY!! ANOTHER MARVEL FAN YAYYY!!
I’ve lost my friend due to cancer 2 years ago. so i hold back breaking into tears whenever someone talks about cancer. my black spot will never leave.
Ive noticed a lot of people commenting about their grief moments on this video. I just wanna say that you all are amazing and lots of people love you even if they don’t know you. This painting is also very beautiful! I love the way you incorporate pain with beauty without making anything bigger or smaller than it actually is. This is an amazing way to view life and the struggles we that have to go through with it. ❤️
I lost my father 4 months ago few days after my 18th birthday. Since I got back to school in Feb people just use me and talk to me how ever they want. If I didn't have my teacher to relay on, I don't know how bad things would be... So thank you to everyone who try to help someone in need♥️
I'm so sorry for your loss, i'm sure you'll meet people who will love and support you, and i wish you the best in your life 💕
I’m so sorry for ur loss, and don’t let people get to u…hope u have a great day..bye 🙂
I'm sorry for your loss. I hope as well as your teachers, you have a good support network with people that also knew and loved your father so you can grow & honour him together. Have a lovely day, I hope you're all doing okay x
I know how this feels, I lost my best freinds Mom. She had cancer and was a very great woman. She was always happy even when she was in pain,and even though she wasent my parent, she felt like one. Just remember that he loves you very much and he would be so proud of you if he was here. I love you so much have a great life. You are very loved, keep pushing through and you will be okay.I promise 😊😊😊
@@skylarandjabez1547 it’s very nice of u to try to help her feel better 🙂
Loss is such a universal experience. It’s essential we see that everyone has lost someone and we can connect and help each other make it through life. Because life is tough.
This was the best explanation I’ve ever heard. After losing my mom, I spent a year lost in the darkness, and then started rebuilding my life. Some days are better than others, but I often struggle to explain the light just on the other side of the darkness and this does that perfectly! 💖💖💖
You have no idea how much I needed this right now. I've had three deaths in the family since the end of last year. One was a cousin younger than me who had a rough life. My grandma was another one that hit me the hardest. I'm still struggling to process the grief and pray everyday that nothing else happens to my family. 😔
@@sanjananayak29 Thank you 😔
Do you mind telling me how old the cousin was and how they passed?
@@edaslongtoenails9804 I don't mind. He was in his late twenties and had a grand mal seizure and fell into a frozen canal.
I lost my dog in March, he had been with me since i was born. Thank you.
Thank you for confirming grief doesn't just go away. I've been trying to fight and forget mine but it keeps coming back
Im very happy I'm listening to you, I've lost my long lost friend, Bingi, he was my 12 year old cat, he was my age and he had to get put down 2 months ago by an animal attack, he had an abscess and something wrong with his kidney, he was dehydrated even though there was water there for him, he was my best friend, a ginger cat and the most loving, caring, cutest, kindest, bravest, nicest cat I have ever owned, I can't get over him getting out down, I cry and pray everyday to see him in heaven, I miss him so much I loved him, he used to always cuddle up against my neck when I was feeling down love you Bingi 😢🥺❤️💜❤️💜❤️💜
I’m glad to hear someone say this , I lost my brother and everyone told me it will be ok time will heal it . No it’s never going to get better, you’ll just be able to understand and live with it .
I lost my grandma last year. I miss her every single day😭💔💔
Thank you so much for this video.
My grandfather died in 1999 and my grandmother died in 2007. I still miss them. 💜🌸💜🌸
I lost mine 2 years ago and it overwhelms me with the fact that I haven’t seen her in 6 years. The last time I saw here I couldn’t really talk to her because she didn’t remember me. You never truely stop missing them.
I lost my grandmother in 2017 and when I need to cry people get angry
@@Electroblade-me4us screw those people. Cry. Let it out if you feel it. Xox
My grandma died last December..
Just now, I heard that my grandpa has died to cancer, and I really needed this. Thank you so much, I hope you have a nice day.
Painting the picture as you explain. Seem to have convinced my brain.Just so fogged I can't make sense of any helpful information. Getting lost In every thought and in all my daily stuff. Thank you. And to those that may read, no matter how foggy or dark it gets, I guess we just gotta keep going and don't stop.
Thank you so much. I just lost my mom to covid and its the worst pain I've ever felt in my life. I miss her so much
I’m a kid that needs help but I know that therapist will just tell all my secrets to my parents but clam it’s a safe place. Thank you for helping me❤️
Could you talk to a school counsellor?
I’m sorry to hear this !!!
The therapist is supposed to be on your side & not discuss what you say to anyone
Did you ask your therapist if she can talk to anyone about what you’ve said ???
In most states they can’t say anything to anyone unless you are a danger to yourself and others and it shouldn’t even be that way !!!
"Time doesn't heal your wounds, it teaches you how to live with it"
-Obito
I love to share my best friend's story of true hope. I pray it is a help to you.
Precious Memories-By Sonya Lakey
Family Story
Little did our family of six know that Friday evening, September 24th, 2021, would be the last night our family would be complete. We laughed together, played games, sang, and enjoyed listening as our 16-year-old son, Ethan, played the piano for us. I packed a lunch for Ethan for a church mountain hike he was going on the following day.
My mother (who was visiting from out of state) and I woke early with Ethan on Saturday morning. He hugged me and smiled, never pulling away or rushing me. He got in the car, waved, said he'd see me later and he loved me. It was hard to watch my "new driver" heading out on his own that morning. As Ethan pulled out of the gate, I turned to my mother and said, "It's just so hard letting go." Little did I know how much "letting go" I was really doing. That was the last time I saw Ethan. He did not make it home that evening.
That afternoon, a friend tried to contact my husband, leaving an urgent message to call him back. He tried several times to return the call to no avail. As we were preparing supper, an overwhelming feeling of deep concern for Ethan filled my heart. I quietly blinked back tears. I glanced out the window, half expecting to see a police officer pull up to the house, but no one arrived. However, within a few minutes, a patrol car DID pull into the driveway. In my heart, I feared the worst. My husband and I went out to meet the officer, who confirmed our fears. Hesitantly, he told us our son had fallen off of
a bluff and had succumbed to his injuries. Our hearts were crushed; they still are.
Yet, in all of our brokenness, deep, continual grief and loneliness, our family has such a blessed Hope and assurance that we will see our dear son and brother again. You see, when Ethan was a young boy, he was saved; he put his faith in Jesus alone to forgive his sins and to take him to Heaven when he died. He realized some very important truths from the Bible that he would want to share with you.
His Story
Everyone is a sinner. Sin is any violation of God’s Law. God is holy, just and righteous, and He cannot allow sin in His presence. Ethan realized that he - like all of us - had sinned; and his sin separated Him from God.
“For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God; ” (Romans 3:23)
“Wherefore, as by one man sin entered into the world, and death by sin; and so death passed upon all men, for that all have sinned:” (Romans 5:12)
He understood that, because of his sin, he deserved to spend eternity in Hell.
“For the wages of sin is death;” (Romans 6:23a) [Wages: price]
“But the fearful, and unbelieving, and the abominable, and murderers, and whoremongers, and sorcerers, and idolaters, and all liars, shall have their part in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone: which is the second death.” (Revelation 21:8)
Ethan believed that Jesus, God’s Son, paid the price for all sin when He died on the cross - because His sinless sacrifice was the only thing that could satisfy the just demands of a righteous, holy God. Jesus was buried in a borrowed tomb, but He arose the third day, triumphant over sin, death, and Hell. Jesus is alive today!
“For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.” (John 3:16)
“For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God: Not of works, lest any man should boast.” (Ephesians 2:8-9)
Ethan was sorry for his sin, repented (turned), and received by faith the free gift that God offered to him.
“For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved.” (Romans 10:13)
“...but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord.” (Romans 6:23b)
Because of this great salvation, Ethan lived his life serving Jesus. He worked hard to spread this Good News to the world. He is alive in Heaven with Jesus today; and because of this great HOPE in Christ, we know we will see him again soon - not because he was a great kid, but because of his faith in the great Saviour!
“And I give unto them eternal life; and they shall never perish, neither shall any man pluck them out of my hand.” (John 10:28)
Your Story
What about you? What if you had fallen to your death that day - What if you were to die today? Where will you spend eternity - Heaven or the Lake of Fire? There will not be any parties in the Lake of Fire. It is a place of eternal torment for those who reject God's Son.
The Word of God is very clear that there is only One Way to Heaven.
“Jesus saith unto him, I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me.” (John 14:6)
We did not know that Ethan would step into eternity that day; however, because he put his faith in Jesus alone for his salvation, Ethan was ready to go. Some day - perhaps today - you will take your last breath here on earth, and you will step into eternity. Where you spend eternity is determined by what you do with Jesus Christ. Will you accept Him or reject Him? You are not promised another day or another breath. Eternity begins soon - Are you ready?
“...Believe on the Lord Jesus Christ, and thou shalt be saved…” (Acts 16:31b)
“For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved.” (Romans 10:13)
“(...behold, now is the day of salvation.)” (2 Corinthians 6:2c)
******************************
This testimony has been made into a tract form as well, so if you or your church are interested in having them to pass out, please go to libertyfaith.net and you will find the contact info there. God bless!
Tribute to Ethan Lakey
ua-cam.com/video/EhobcQZ6Qb8/v-deo.html
You save someone everyday.thanks for this.Grief is all LOVE.missing my love 💓
My dad was such an important figure in my life. I was 12 when he died and I didn’t really understand it then but i think I have more grief now than then
That makes sense. In order to start to accepting your grief, you first have to process it. You were too young to do that properly at age 12, you most likely just compartmentalized it so you could go on with life normally. Now that you’re older and not understanding, though, you’re experiencing essentially a second wave of his death, as if it only just occurred. Be gentle with yourself, everyone’s journey after losing a loved one is different, and they’re all equally valid and correct. Don’t let time dictate how you’re allowed to feel, it’s only more damaging to bottle it up. I wish you the absolute best on your road to acceptance, I won’t say it gets better, but you slowly learn to navigate it.
@@ellespoonies Thx means a lot 🙏
When I had some grief counselling after my daughter died one of the best bits of advice I took away was making some time to be sad and think about your loss, start with an hour every day then every other day, and so on. It stops the sadness creeping in to your every day activities, if you feel the thoughts creeping in, tell yourself, not now, later. With time you can control the pain.
I cannot imagine. I am so sorry for your loss ❤️
@@hollyl5702 Thank you, it was a long time ago, and although I am sad I have found ways to compartmentalise and move forward 💞🙏
@@violentviolet1404 trying to create these separations is actially a great effort and painful.... Why not allow it totally consume you...
@@channiedhillon Because life must go on, I had other children who needed me, a partner who was trying to cope with the same heartbreak, my wages were supporting my family so I had to continue to work. All of these things would have been impossible had I given myself over to grief.
After more or less 15 years of losing my mom to cancer, I still get these painful flashbacks. And I feel like I could never be happy again. I was a teenager then and now I'm an adult. I love my mom so much and if she's still alive she would comfort me. I still dream about her and when I do, I desperately want to go back to my dream. When life gets tough, I think about her. I'm such a mama's boy but I can help it, I love her so much. You're right the pain doesn't go away, you just live with it.
Thank you Julie, I found you when I was really struggling with life last year. Your wee videos sum up situations so powerfully & your book is wonderful to dip into s back up. I lost my husband over 5 years ago, but it took til last year to really hit me & make me deal with it. I have regularly used your tools, but only found this video tonight & it helps show me how much colour I have in my life now, whilst still having space & time for that black circle in the. Ideal when needed ❤
Seven years ago I lost my wonderful great aunt Annette, she was more like a grandmother to me than her sister; my actual grandmother. Sometimes I still cry when I think about her and how I wish I could show her all that I am today. But three years ago I gave birth to a beautiful baby girl who I named after my aunt. She's made that grief I hold so much easier, and I know my auntie is smiling down on her with pride and love ❤️
Congratulations!!!!
@@eleanorseddon1384 thank you 😊
My son passed away on 12/10/19 and my dad passed away on 4/21/2022. I’m beyond lost and confused but everyday I try my best to move forward with my life.
I'm so sorry for your loss, you are so strong, you got this, its gonna get better
I’m so sorry for you and your amazing and never forget that⭐️
I'm sorry for your loss, I hope you're finding new things to be excited about in life and I wish you a lovely day
I'm so sorry for your loss. You don't deserve any of it
Bless you
The way dr Julie describe the answers to a psychology problem is just so easy to understand!
I’ve watched this logical demonstration for hundreds times, and this does help. It’s such a visual example which can guide the right way to go in the right process of healing. ✨appreciated your precious work 🙏✨
I lost my grandma when i was 8, and my grandpa a week ago, so now i am completely without grandparents (the other two passed away before i was born). I miss them and sometimes i cry thinking about them. That black spot is still there, but I'm managing to smile again thanks to the support my friends and family give me, and to the beatiful moments they make me experience 💕
MY heart goes out to you
My best friend died at 14 years old of HLH when I was just 13 years old, from the bottom of my heart, thank you so much, thank you for helping people like me who needed to hear this as much as I did
I just lost my mum 3 days ago. I don’t feel I can make it. The loss I feared my whole life. She was all I had. Oh mom how I love you I’m so sorry and I miss you and I will always and forever miss u it still doesn’t feel real oh mom :/
I just lost my dog a few hours ago and this made me ball. Thank you Dr. Julie 🕊🖤
😢
It’s been 8 months since i lost my sister and niece, and literally days after i got very sick from Covid and my body has not been the same since. Since then a lot has happened and I’ve made new memories, good and bad. I’ve tried moving on and forgetting it but I can’t, but this is an exact example of how the process has been going. I just hope a few years down the road the good memories I’ve made since are easier to remember than the memories of what happened.
Thank you, I needed this.. When my uncle passed away, i was avoiding all of my social media apps, since it was hard to accept my grandma’s (even though it was 5 months ago), and a few days ago my mom shared a post of a long message my cousin posted, and I feel like she did it so I can change. The post was the lines of “always in my room” and “avoiding family gatherings” i know my mom show me that so I wouldn’t end up with regrets, but it was very wrong of her to use someone’s grief for her own benefit and on that night I had a breakdown about my grandma. It’s still hard looking at her grave, and even at her room.
Thank you for so much for letting me see another side of the topic, the things I only got to received were “Everything happens for a reason” that kind of “comfort” made me feel worse… thank you
Whoever is out there is still having a hard time accepting someone’s passing, just to let you know you aren’t alone, I felt comfort reading everyone’s comments. People who understood me.. My family aren’t the type to open up their feelings, and so it’s hard for me to find someone to talk with.. Thanks for reading this long message from me, I hope everyone out there have a lovely day/night
I am also a clinical psychologist. I am working with patients suffering from cancer. I talked to many people that lost them. What I want to add to your painting are some White spots in this black Point. Because grief can Change and those Happy memories can be so powerful that there will be Stars in this grief. Thank you.❤
I lost a dear friend and a good person in such a violent way last month. The grief and pain is still there. There sometimes I shed tears and start crying. The pain, guilt, and raw emotion is still there, but we got to learn how to live and cope with this pain. Help us be stronger and better ourselves.
This was so helpful. Truly the grief is always there and it can be triggered suddenly and unexpectedly, bringing great pain and sadness to the surface. But it's still possible to experience moments of great joy and delight in our life.
Thikyou I am so sad my great-grandmother died and I can't even imagine how much love to all of us to experience expanded our life together 💔 😔 😞 😪 😢
So sorry for your loss
I lost my dad 4 years ago, this is the only time I have actually understood grief. I'm still going through it and this actually made me feel happy in a way
It stays for ever! Time can never heal that pain. It's been 15 years, and I still couldn't get out of it. I will miss you for eternity ❤️
I lost my father 2 years ago and i still feel sad even until today 😢
I really really needed to hear this, thank you so much for this
Hjg
No worries!
i lost a really good friend of mine last night and this was exactly what i needed. thank you ❤
I could’ve needed this years ago. This was just beautiful thank you for visually showing what grief can look like with art.
i lost my uncle 4 days back, and this actually helped so much
I'm sorry for your loss. You are strong!! I know he loved you very much and he is probably looking down on you and saying things like "I'm so proud".
I feel like loosing someone is something no one every can forget, like my grandad died at the end of 2019 just before covid, and I still can’t look at photos of him and people with this Irish accents remind me a lot of him. Sometimes I remember what I was doing the day he died, and I remember that when he died, I was at school telling people about him, completely clueless that he died and I didn’t find out until 3 days later that the moment he died, I was talking about him.
❤️ Thinking about it and remembering can be hard and in your own time in your grief journey it can help to do something in remembrance. I celebrate my loved ones birthday, that they were here and that we got to spend time with them and it's really nice. We share stories about them and I've gotten to learn things about them that I didn't know before.
Thank your so much for this i've lost my dad 1 year ago and it was heart breaking to say the least.... But your video really gave me some inspiration I needed ❤️🙏🏻
💕💕💕
Thank you for Illustrating Grief so Beautifully...I lost my Beloved son Erek 3 years ago. The Pain is so Deep & hits me to my Soul. I am learning to live a new way but that pain is always there & it surfaces randomly...🩵💜💔
I Love you Infinity Erek...😭😢
Mom
This explains so much. I lost my grandmother that was really close to me when I was 19. For the most part I have moved past the pain yet there are still moments that it comes barreling in.
Grandma: Dies
Me for the past 4 years: Atleast cries abt her 14 times a year
Stay strong
Why 14 times a year?
I still have my grandma I can't even think of losing her in my life she's a huuuge part of my life
❤
After my son passed away its taken me 20 years to create a rainbow around my grief. Thank you for sharing!
This video made me cry because I'm super scared for when my best friend, my senior cat will eventually pass away. But this video made me notice that I can still be happy for when that eventually happens. 😊❤
I had lost my grandmother 2 years ago. I never knew anything even close to death, it was my first experience with death.
I always thought that time will heal the pain but it never did.
For me my grandmother was a ray of sunshine.
This really comforts me, thank you
Thank you so much. I lost someone i truly care about, the individual betrayed me and i almost lost everything I have but with time i i find myself.....
I lost my dad a month ago now, and I only 12. I recently found your channel and you help me so much. Thank you, for putting feelings in a different light so it's easier to understand
❤I am so so sorry hun. Please please spend time with loved ones and share your feelings. See a therapist. Don't bottle this all in. Sending love and healing energy your way.
and if your grief is big, it fills up your canvas, you can paint it over. you know it's always there as a part of you, but life goes on and new memories and moments of joy are being made.
you are made beautiful and nothing will ever change that, not even your bad experiences and failures.
I haven't really "lost" my once best friend. She's still alive and well. But she has not talked to me in years. We parted on bad terms. And i cannot ever have her back in my life. It is still a loss to me, and this video still applies.
Same situation for me, been a year and a half. 😞 5 year friendship, can’t even see how she’s doing because she doesn’t use any social media except Snapchat to text :(
It’s been 3 months since my dad passed..I’ve been doing all I can to not lose myself in that black hole 💔
Lost my young brother Adan n the pain and grief has never faded...its always deep down in my heart... life goes on.. wounds heal but the scars remain. Miss him beyond measure. Cant see him but he is still alive in my heart my mind..
I love how she explains it with materials in every video
I lost my last set of great grandparents on the same day, first my great grandmother died, my great grandfather didn’t know bc he was also in the hospital, he died a couple hours laters, I was devastated, but I’m happy knowing that he didn’t die sad that his wife died a couple hours before him
I’ve lost so much of my family. I needed this
I just lost my father in law. This video will hopefully help my husband and I slowly heal around this grief. Thank you ❤
When I was 12, I fell in love truly with the man of my dreams, and we grew up and continued our journey. I became pregnant at the age of 16 and had a baby. Two years later, we got married and barely a month later my husband was diagnosed with a serious fatal illness. He was in the hospital for months, and he missed the baby’s third birthday 😭
I miss him every day, this reminded me so much of him.
If you are suffering loss, just remember, it’s hard but hold on for whoever you lost, it’s worth it ❤️
Good luck in your journey.
But I still miss them 😢 😭💔💔
I haven’t lost anyone close to me yet but just the thought of losing one of parents, or one of my siblings, or my best friend, or my cousins, makes me feel really bad inside.
Same
Grief never goes away, because the loss of the person you love is still there, and often the guilt still remains, after decades.
I lost my grandpa last year and i have been grieving for months and blaming myself and this is what i need to know and hear that no one else i know tell me. Thank you, Dr. Julie
I'm at the verge of tears, i lost a LOT of friends before since they kept switching schools
I hate saying “lost” as we didnt lose them they just transitioned, if anything I gained a new powerful guardian angel who I once called mom in human form about 4 months now…it’s definitely interesting as I noticed it doesnt go away, u just learned to laugh, love and do other everyday things while carrying that heavy grief in ur chest. Its an interesting process that u never truly know or understand what people mean until it happens to u and it all makes sense. Thank u for this, our loved ones did not come here and leave only to have us stuck in a never ending depressing cycle. They want us to paint the rest of our lives as u said (without ignoring the pain of course) until we meet again! Thank u
I lost my grandfather in May 2019. Nine months later my great grandma died. Five months after that my uncle died. Last week my great grandfather died. I’ve been experiencing a lot of loss too close together. This was extremely comforting to hear. It makes me feel like it’s okay to be sad about it for a long time but life still goes on and you can still be happy even without them.
I lost my mom when I was seven this helps me a lot but even when you have bad things going on you know they still love you
This is such a beautiful explanation. Thank you!
“Life is a jawbreaker”
I have experienced grief and am able to tell you it does not completely fade away, but keeping your heart and mind open and new love will enter your life. The moments of new love and pre-existing love will assist in making life easier to continue moving forward.
That was a great analogy, because over time we are able to function better, we find distractions and we start to feel the ups (and downs) of life again but the hurt never really goes away... If I think about my losses, at times I get so cut up about it, that I break down. But that's a marked improvement from breaking down every day and having trouble going about day to day life. So the saying "Time heals all wounds" is a little convoluted, as the wounds aren't so much healed (as in gone completely), but more bearable.