What it’s like to struggle with depression? The feeling of drowning while everyone else around you is breathing. Always feeling numb and alone. Screaming for help, but nobody can hear you.
Depression is like trying to crawl out of the deepest darkest pit. And every time you get to the surface and you can see a tiny bit of hope you get kicked in the face and back down you go!
As someone with severe depression, anxiety, & PTSD, you’re videos are so so incredibly helpful, wether you have a mental illness yourself or if you have a loved one with a mental illness.
Hi Julia, My boyfriend recently is having depression and it has been really hard. It has been going on and off for a while now. But now it has been getting worse. I was searching through youtube and i found your videos. I find it this video very useful. I have better understanding now.
Oh boy...I was watching that with tears in my eyes! I can relate 100% to what you said, Kristin, as I have a cyclical depressive illness (today is not a good day). It's such a great idea what you're doing to get people talking about this illness - as you say, if you have a broken leg you'd get rushed to hospital. If you're depressed, on the other hand, people ignore you. Thank you for having the courage to post this and thank you, Julia, for giving us the opportunity to open the talk up and make it public xx
Julia Kristina Counselling Hi Julia, that's a really tricky question to he honest because nothing external will affect the way I feel. It's always heart-warming to receive a text or message from a friend just to let me know they're there for me. Depression is a very isolating experience.
Hi Julia, LikeKristen nailed it....When in a depressive episode, never underestimate the power of words. When a loved one sincerely says they are there for you and truly care about you can work like magic. With experiencing depression myself, try adding the power of touch, give them a hug and/or a gentle pat or hold their hand. The physical touch sort of shifts the mind away from the overwhelming thoughts followed with true words of affirmation can break the depressive cycle. I did find it interesting LikeKristen commented about change. If change triggers depression, what are some ways to cope with the change to reduce depression?
I wish we could discuss more about the different ways in which people experience depression. I am ashamed of my depressive episodes and I never talk to anyone about them, so no one among my friends and family know how bad it can get (suicidal thoughts and all, just like Kristen described it). But I've met some people who would tell anyone who would listen that they are depressive, that they are on medication, that they are seeing a therapist, as if that's something to brag about. I'm not saying depression is something shameful; even though I myself feel ashamed to talk about it, I know intellectually that depression can affect anyone and that it's important to seek help. But because I find it so difficult to talk about it, I don't understand how other people can be so open. Are they really depressed or just attention-seekers? I sometimes think that some people use depression as an excuse for failure, when all that's wrong with them is that they lack motivation or ambition... Hearing people say "I'm depressed" so often, makes me think "No, you're not, you have no idea what it's like", which makes things worse because I feel like I'm being judgemental..
Nancy Corbeil I can definitely relate to thinking that some individuals who claim to have depression, anxiety, PTSD, or any mental illness, really don’t & think that having a shitty week means they have depression. Personally, for me, I’m very open about my depression, PTSD, past heroin addiction, & past self-harm, but _only_ when I’m in specific places like therapy or a woman’s trauma group, where I know that I actually can be open, where I know others can listen & relate, & where I know i’ll less likely be judged. If I tell someone I have depression & PTSD & have a therapist the last thing I’d ever think of even doing, is bragging. I honestly don’t even know why anyone with a mental illness would brag about something so serious anyway. Like I said, I’m very open with my own mental illness & trauma, but that’s after 15+yrs of dealing with it, & I sure as hell wasn’t open about it when I was younger. I know most of the time we cannot control how we think or how we see others, and I try to never be judge mental towards someone else because I know how much I hate when someone’s judgmental towards me. It took a very long time for me to properly deal with my issues to the point where I was able to be open about them, because after I was opening up about it I instantly felt 10x better. I mean, if you actually did eventually open up about everything & someone thought you were either bragging or attention-seeking I’m sure that it’d be very hurtful to be judged for finally being open & honest, because that shit is hard as hell to do to begin with. Easier said then done, but whenever I find myself being unintentionally judge mental I try to put myself in their shoes. I know when someone makes me feel like what I’m going through or what I feel isn’t as important or as bad as what someone is going through or feeling, it makes me even more depressed, even more like shit, and feel even more unimportant then depression already convinces is we are. But everyone has their own opinions & that’s totally okay because we should have our own opinions.
My depression is an all time high. Depression has a hold on me.. its cold hard chains are keeping me from moving. My screams fall on deaf ears. I feel so empty, so scared, so lost. I am frustrated, lonely, sad. I hate that I wake up in the morning. I wish there was a switch I could pull to just die and end it all. I wish it was that easy.
I feel the same way too. I describe it as wearing concrete boots that noone else knows I am wearing. Everyone is running a marathon around me and lapping me, telling me to go faster and that Im just not trying hard enough, but I just cant lift my feet to take a step any faster. Some days I cant take a single step. Some days are better. But everyday those boots are still there and they never leave and you can't take them off, not even for 1 minute. Some days I am defeated and don't even want to try to take a step. Some days I can almost forget Im wearing them. The hardest part for me is waking up to discover they are still there, and having people tell me that I couldnt possibly be depressed because Im too outwardly happy. They have no clue its just trying to put on a brave face to face the world...its all a facade to get through the day.
I have bad anxiety which led to depression- I was super resistant to the idea of therapy let alone medication! But it got bad enough I couldn't ignore it and gave in - WOW therapy really helped me but with my family history I also needed meds! I was totally against it but My therapist convinced me to try it and I feel like my old self again!
SO so happy to hear it!! Wow, what a great story. And yes, sometimes the combo of meds and therapy are exactly what is needed. Good for you for reaching out for the support you needed.
It's so true, if you think a loved one is struggling say something! My senior year of high school I was very depressed and felt so invisible. About a year later my mom said that she had noticed and it scared her, yet even knowing that we have a family history she never said anything to me while I was struggling. It would have meant the world for her to even notice that I wasn't okay.
This is literally my situation now..senior year piled up studies and I am struggling really hard to even get out of bed and no one in my family cares to see a little deeper into what is up with me
Dear Julia We work in the same building here on Granville street. As a woman sometimes I find life difficult Watching your video makes me feel happier. I want to thank you so much for changing my life. Your videos have helped me change my life so much. You might never notice but I really appreciate what you have done for me with your videos. from your no.1 female Brazilian Fan - T.C.
I really wish i had a friend like kristen.. She's really good a giving tips and advice and of course julia too.. I've been suffering from depression and i really need help..
Thanks Julia Kristina, I have for a while now, suffered with depression. I have been diagnosed with chronic depression. At least on the moderate scale. This was very helpful. I can truely relate with both you & Kristen. I think I will subscribe to her channel too.
I have schizophrenia I was just realeased from a psychiatric hospital for 16 days i need it my mental health exponentially worse so now I feel much better thank you mental health is very important people need to know about schizophrenia i was diagnosed with schizophrenia at 18 i am still struggling with depression.
I'm a 42 year old married man, on my second marriage, and I have delt with depression since I was 9 or 10 years old. My struggle started when my mother and father got divorced and my family was low income, so we couldn't afford nor did my family see that I needed help. When I was 14 my grandmother passed away and she was my rock. At that point in my life I had lost my dad through divorce and we didnt speak and then my wonderful grandmother passed away and I couldn't handle it. It was 1989 when I put a loaded gun in my mouth and placed my finger on the trigger, but right before I closed my eyes to start squeezing, I seen this big white Holy Bible on the coffee table. I called 911 and I got help. There are a lot of times I wish was in another room...
I loved the collab. It was a great video! Loved the tips! But the video could have been longer. Just saying. It felt really brief/ rushed. Other than that, great video!
Check out Dr William Glassers books on Choice and Depression. Dr Glasser spoke around the world wrote many books and had his own Institute. But he was treated badly by the conventional medicine because he had a different approach from them. He would go into prisons and show prisoners how to change their outlook.
Where do I start?! First of all, this very young lady should NOT be speaking for anyone but herself! I don’t give a rip that she has a channel; she had nothing “helpful” to say to me, a now-65 year old who struggled with Dysthemia long before she was born. The rest of my diagnosis: Severe AD/H/D, Generalized Anxiety Disorder, near-lifelong Complex PTSD, Auditory Processing Disorder, OCD, Dyslexia, Dysthymia, bouts of Major Depression (the one I’m in now having been triggered by a vicious assault in Oct. 2017, by a tenant still down the hall from me). As challenging as it is/always has been, I’ve been up close to much worse, as my mother, at least one of 3 younger siblings, and at least one of my two grown children, are/were BiPolar/BPD and/or Schizophrenic. Neurobiologically speaking, I got off easy, diagnosis-wise-and am grateful for it. (Since the 1990’s I’ve also become physically disabled: Mostly spinal, but also musculoskeletal)...Can’t work, live on just over $800/month in SSI thanks to an incompetent law firm; am alone/abandoned by sibs I loved, and old friends embarrassed by my poverty. Do have a more recent friend I’m so grateful for, as a semi-shut-in who has no way to meet other peers. My life was never easy, but once my only/treasured daughter became on/off Psychotic, etc., 13 years ago, it got a lot harder. I’ll spare details, but have seen much ongoing heartbreak, etc....One thing that’s helped was advocating for my 30-something, who’s cut me off, rendering me unable to help now, due to HIPPA laws and a lousy system. I have done LOTS of research through the years-too depressed for that, now-and have often understood MORE than the Social Workers unqualified to replace the Drs. no longer provided by Medicaid. I was once bullied into taking an antidepressant, which only made things worse, and have seen appalling over/mis-use of them by the never-ending Clown Parade treating my daughter. (And I’ve seen/heard worse than what she’s been through, or myself, and am grateful for that, too). I tried for years, unsuccessfully, to get help with my Complex PTSD. Everything’s a fight, and it’s exhausting! As a poor person lucky to be housed (my advocacy got my daughter housed, but no lack of problems), I must deal with various agencies and an abusive mgr., all of which is more than I’m able to cope with, as depressed as I am. But I am stuck! I do have an “advocate” at a non-profit for disabled-for whom I am extremely grateful-but she can only do so much over the phone. My best is nowhere near good enough anymore, and my growing resistance to BS is concerning my advocate, who fears the loss of my housing as much as I used to. Now I’m just fed up. My big hope for the future is a lottery win, but don’t often buy a ticket because symptoms/pain keep me in most days. I never envisioned a future (much less my two brilliant grown children’s) like this. Didn’t mean to say this much, but watching your little video, with your little “depressed”-from my perspective-child, with her considerable resources, presuming to speak for OTHER “depressed”, was the proverbial straw that broke this old nag’s back...(As a double Sagittarian, I’m half horse, half Nan). I spent decades pushing the rock back up the hill, no matter what. Now? I’m not ready to give up, but I’m too damn tired to do it alone. This is too long, so I’ll end here. Thankyou for your time.
I don't mean to be this guy, but I've never had people care, I've only ever been told other people have it worse, its just a phase, they don't want to talk to me and they belive as a guy I just need to get a job.
What it’s like to struggle with depression?
The feeling of drowning while everyone else around you is breathing.
Always feeling numb and alone. Screaming for help, but nobody can hear you.
Right..
Totally hopeless
Addicted to giving attention to personal feelings.
Depression is like trying to crawl out of the deepest darkest pit. And every time you get to the surface and you can see a tiny bit of hope you get kicked in the face and back down you go!
This made me laugh. You are exactly right.
As someone with severe depression, anxiety, & PTSD, you’re videos are so so incredibly helpful, wether you have a mental illness yourself or if you have a loved one with a mental illness.
my best friend has chronic depression and i think that your videos have helped me to understand my friend better. thanks for uploading these videos.
Hi Julia, My boyfriend recently is having depression and it has been really hard. It has been going on and off for a while now. But now it has been getting worse. I was searching through youtube and i found your videos. I find it this video very useful. I have better understanding now.
So glad you found this helpful Naabiiha.
Oh boy...I was watching that with tears in my eyes! I can relate 100% to what you said, Kristin, as I have a cyclical depressive illness (today is not a good day). It's such a great idea what you're doing to get people talking about this illness - as you say, if you have a broken leg you'd get rushed to hospital. If you're depressed, on the other hand, people ignore you. Thank you for having the courage to post this and thank you, Julia, for giving us the opportunity to open the talk up and make it public xx
Nicky Pasquier Hi Ms. Nicky, I totally understand....Sending a hug to brighten your day! ☺
Thanks for sharing that Nicky - Bad days are so tough. What do you need or find helpful when you are struggling with Depression?
Brent A. Thank you 😚
Julia Kristina Counselling Hi Julia, that's a really tricky question to he honest because nothing external will affect the way I feel. It's always heart-warming to receive a text or message from a friend just to let me know they're there for me. Depression is a very isolating experience.
My girlfriend has depression and I don't know how to help her :/ there are days I think when I wake up she will be death :(
Hi Julia, LikeKristen nailed it....When in a depressive episode, never underestimate the power of words. When a loved one sincerely says they are there for you and truly care about you can work like magic. With experiencing depression myself, try adding the power of touch, give them a hug and/or a gentle pat or hold their hand. The physical touch sort of shifts the mind away from the overwhelming thoughts followed with true words of affirmation can break the depressive cycle. I did find it interesting LikeKristen commented about change. If change triggers depression, what are some ways to cope with the change to reduce depression?
Brent A. thanks for sharing that - I think for many people touch can be so powerful.
I wish we could discuss more about the different ways in which people experience depression.
I am ashamed of my depressive episodes and I never talk to anyone about them, so no one among my friends and family know how bad it can get (suicidal thoughts and all, just like Kristen described it). But I've met some people who would tell anyone who would listen that they are depressive, that they are on medication, that they are seeing a therapist, as if that's something to brag about. I'm not saying depression is something shameful; even though I myself feel ashamed to talk about it, I know intellectually that depression can affect anyone and that it's important to seek help. But because I find it so difficult to talk about it, I don't understand how other people can be so open. Are they really depressed or just attention-seekers? I sometimes think that some people use depression as an excuse for failure, when all that's wrong with them is that they lack motivation or ambition... Hearing people say "I'm depressed" so often, makes me think "No, you're not, you have no idea what it's like", which makes things worse because I feel like I'm being judgemental..
Nancy Corbeil
I can definitely relate to thinking that some individuals who claim to have depression, anxiety, PTSD, or any mental illness, really don’t & think that having a shitty week means they have depression. Personally, for me, I’m very open about my depression, PTSD, past heroin addiction, & past self-harm, but _only_ when I’m in specific places like therapy or a woman’s trauma group, where I know that I actually can be open, where I know others can listen & relate, & where I know i’ll less likely be judged. If I tell someone I have depression & PTSD & have a therapist the last thing I’d ever think of even doing, is bragging. I honestly don’t even know why anyone with a mental illness would brag about something so serious anyway. Like I said, I’m very open with my own mental illness & trauma, but that’s after 15+yrs of dealing with it, & I sure as hell wasn’t open about it when I was younger. I know most of the time we cannot control how we think or how we see others, and I try to never be judge mental towards someone else because I know how much I hate when someone’s judgmental towards me. It took a very long time for me to properly deal with my issues to the point where I was able to be open about them, because after I was opening up about it I instantly felt 10x better. I mean, if you actually did eventually open up about everything & someone thought you were either bragging or attention-seeking I’m sure that it’d be very hurtful to be judged for finally being open & honest, because that shit is hard as hell to do to begin with. Easier said then done, but whenever I find myself being unintentionally judge mental I try to put myself in their shoes. I know when someone makes me feel like what I’m going through or what I feel isn’t as important or as bad as what someone is going through or feeling, it makes me even more depressed, even more like shit, and feel even more unimportant then depression already convinces is we are. But everyone has their own opinions & that’s totally okay because we should have our own opinions.
You are (being judgemental).
My depression is an all time high. Depression has a hold on me.. its cold hard chains are keeping me from moving. My screams fall on deaf ears. I feel so empty, so scared, so lost. I am frustrated, lonely, sad. I hate that I wake up in the morning. I wish there was a switch I could pull to just die and end it all. I wish it was that easy.
I feel the same way too. I describe it as wearing concrete boots that noone else knows I am wearing. Everyone is running a marathon around me and lapping me, telling me to go faster and that Im just not trying hard enough, but I just cant lift my feet to take a step any faster. Some days I cant take a single step. Some days are better. But everyday those boots are still there and they never leave and you can't take them off, not even for 1 minute. Some days I am defeated and don't even want to try to take a step. Some days I can almost forget Im wearing them. The hardest part for me is waking up to discover they are still there, and having people tell me that I couldnt possibly be depressed because Im too outwardly happy. They have no clue its just trying to put on a brave face to face the world...its all a facade to get through the day.
I have bad anxiety which led to depression- I was super resistant to the idea of therapy let alone medication! But it got bad enough I couldn't ignore it and gave in - WOW therapy really helped me but with my family history I also needed meds! I was totally against it but My therapist convinced me to try it and I feel like my old self again!
SO so happy to hear it!! Wow, what a great story. And yes, sometimes the combo of meds and therapy are exactly what is needed. Good for you for reaching out for the support you needed.
Depression sucks thx you for being open & honest. It helps people so much ❤️❤️
So glad you found it helpful!
It's so true, if you think a loved one is struggling say something! My senior year of high school I was very depressed and felt so invisible. About a year later my mom said that she had noticed and it scared her, yet even knowing that we have a family history she never said anything to me while I was struggling. It would have meant the world for her to even notice that I wasn't okay.
Thanks for sharing that Jane. A really great reminder to all of us to say something!
This is literally my situation now..senior year piled up studies and I am struggling really hard to even get out of bed and no one in my family cares to see a little deeper into what is up with me
Dear Julia
We work in the same building here on Granville street. As a woman sometimes I find life difficult Watching your video makes me feel happier. I want to thank you so much for changing my life. Your videos have helped me change my life so much. You might never notice but I really appreciate what you have done for me with your videos.
from your no.1 female Brazilian Fan
- T.C.
That is so kind of you to say, and I am so grateful they have helped you. Thank YOU for showing up and not settling for living in struggle.
You have been a God sent to me.. I found your channel yesterday. Thankyou❤
That means a lot to me - thanks for saying so!
Your videos are pure gold. Thank you for motivating me and explaining to me what I'm feeling.
SO so grateful you are finding them useful Silas.
These videos are GOLDEN!!! Thank you
So so glad you found it useful Michael. Thanks for taking the time to say so!
I really wish i had a friend like kristen.. She's really good a giving tips and advice and of course julia too.. I've been suffering from depression and i really need help..
Thanks Julia Kristina, I have for a while now, suffered with depression. I have been diagnosed with chronic depression. At least on the moderate scale. This was very helpful. I can truely relate with both you & Kristen. I think I will subscribe to her channel too.
I have schizophrenia I was just realeased from a psychiatric hospital for 16 days i need it my mental health exponentially worse so now I feel much better thank you mental health is very important people need to know about schizophrenia i was diagnosed with schizophrenia at 18 i am still struggling with depression.
Thank you for giving me hope, i needed that
I'm a 42 year old married man, on my second marriage, and I have delt with depression since I was 9 or 10 years old. My struggle started when my mother and father got divorced and my family was low income, so we couldn't afford nor did my family see that I needed help. When I was 14 my grandmother passed away and she was my rock. At that point in my life I had lost my dad through divorce and we didnt speak and then my wonderful grandmother passed away and I couldn't handle it. It was 1989 when I put a loaded gun in my mouth and placed my finger on the trigger, but right before I closed my eyes to start squeezing, I seen this big white Holy Bible on the coffee table. I called 911 and I got help.
There are a lot of times I wish was in another room...
My family never takes me seriously, their denial is astounding. I have been too demeaned to give a s__t anymore.
I loved the collab. It was a great video! Loved the tips! But the video could have been longer. Just saying. It felt really brief/ rushed. Other than that, great video!
What about when your loved one says the care, or they're there for you but their actions say something completely different?
Amazing video!!
I always worry about the future and over thinking what others think of me
I feel very well described by her.
Hi Julia, this is great, we're going to check out her channel
So glad you 2 enjoyed it!
What about when the depressed person says “I’m good,” but clearly isn’t?
Ppl say that cuz ppl askin say stupid things u kno
So relatable. N educative. Kudos to awareness.
Bite size pieces of previous tasks are ideal as a start ... for positive results and feelings Of achievement ..
This was excellent. Thank you!
thank you both for this video
We're glad you enjoyed it Dawn
Do you have a video like "10 Stupidest Things To Say To Someone With Depression"?
You feel completely alone, completely different from everyone else, completely lost, in pieces, like there’s no way to get fixed.
I feel so hopeless and misunderstood.
Omg I luv this n her n u of course
Check out Dr William Glassers books on Choice and Depression. Dr Glasser spoke around the world wrote many books and had his own Institute. But he was treated badly by the conventional medicine because he had a different approach from them. He would go into prisons and show prisoners how to change their outlook.
Hi i whant to NO If trintellix is a good medicin for anxiety/panicattaks and depression?
Where do I start?! First of all, this very young lady should NOT be speaking for anyone but herself! I don’t give a rip that she has a channel; she had nothing “helpful” to say to me, a now-65 year old who struggled with Dysthemia long before she was born. The rest of my diagnosis: Severe AD/H/D, Generalized Anxiety Disorder, near-lifelong Complex PTSD, Auditory Processing Disorder, OCD, Dyslexia, Dysthymia, bouts of Major Depression (the one I’m in now having been triggered by a vicious assault in Oct. 2017, by a tenant still down the hall from me). As challenging as it is/always has been, I’ve been up close to much worse, as my mother, at least one of 3 younger siblings, and at least one of my two grown children, are/were BiPolar/BPD and/or Schizophrenic. Neurobiologically speaking, I got off easy, diagnosis-wise-and am grateful for it. (Since the 1990’s I’ve also become physically disabled: Mostly spinal, but also musculoskeletal)...Can’t work, live on just over $800/month in SSI thanks to an incompetent law firm; am alone/abandoned by sibs I loved, and old friends embarrassed by my poverty. Do have a more recent friend I’m so grateful for, as a semi-shut-in who has no way to meet other peers. My life was never easy, but once my only/treasured daughter became on/off Psychotic, etc., 13 years ago, it got a lot harder. I’ll spare details, but have seen much ongoing heartbreak, etc....One thing that’s helped was advocating for my 30-something, who’s cut me off, rendering me unable to help now, due to HIPPA laws and a lousy system. I have done LOTS of research through the years-too depressed for that, now-and have often understood MORE than the Social Workers unqualified to replace the Drs. no longer provided by Medicaid. I was once bullied into taking an antidepressant, which only made things worse, and have seen appalling over/mis-use of them by the never-ending Clown Parade treating my daughter. (And I’ve seen/heard worse than what she’s been through, or myself, and am grateful for that, too). I tried for years, unsuccessfully, to get help with my Complex PTSD. Everything’s a fight, and it’s exhausting!
As a poor person lucky to be housed (my advocacy got my daughter housed, but no lack of problems), I must deal with various agencies and an abusive mgr., all of which is more than I’m able to cope with, as depressed as I am. But I am stuck! I do have an “advocate” at a non-profit for disabled-for whom I am extremely grateful-but she can only do so much over the phone. My best is nowhere near good enough anymore, and my growing resistance to BS is concerning my advocate, who fears the loss of my housing as much as I used to. Now I’m just fed up. My big hope for the future is a lottery win, but don’t often buy a ticket because symptoms/pain keep me in most days. I never envisioned a future (much less my two brilliant grown children’s) like this.
Didn’t mean to say this much, but watching your little video, with your little “depressed”-from my perspective-child, with her considerable resources, presuming to speak for OTHER “depressed”, was the proverbial straw that broke this old nag’s back...(As a double Sagittarian, I’m half horse, half Nan). I spent decades pushing the rock back up the hill, no matter what. Now? I’m not ready to give up, but I’m too damn tired to do it alone. This is too long, so I’ll end here. Thankyou for your time.
Try mindfulness, it can help with acceptance and forgiveness and peacefulness. 😲
No one:
Julia Kristina: Ok thanks for sharing that
Thanks
Amen!!
I don't mean to be this guy, but I've never had people care, I've only ever been told other people have it worse, its just a phase, they don't want to talk to me and they belive as a guy I just need to get a job.
It's an awful feeling
Who else clicked because of the hair thumbnail?
Likekristen, you are alride that the People dont care to the Depression people
Omg she so cute