How to Heal Love Addiction - Healing Attachment Wounds
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- Опубліковано 16 лип 2024
- Hello. Thanks for checking out my UA-cam channel.
In my videos, I like to talk about Psychology, Healing Attachment Trauma, Relationship Repair, Inner Child Self-Re-Parenting, Love Addiction, Codependency, Grieving Break Ups, Family Programming, Fantasy Relationships, The Romantic Narrative, Primal Panic, Trauma Bonding, Double-Binds, Attachment Styles, Couples Counseling, Better Boundaries, Shame and Self-love, CPTSD Breakthroughs, Emotional Availability, and Body-Focused Psychotherapy for Healing Trauma..
☑️ Heal Your Relationships = #relationships
☑️ Trust Your Intuition = #selfcare
☑️ Repair w/ Counseling = #psychology
Subscribe to my channel to be notified every time I upload a new video.
When you like a video, please click the like button, it helps show support for my channel.
Alan Robarge, LPC, Licensed Professional Counselor,
Attachment-Focused, Trauma-Informed,
Psychotherapist and Relationship Educator
Emotional Connections Matter!
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How to Heal Love Addiction - Healing Attachment Wounds
In this video, I talk about how to heal attachment injuries and trauma. Living with trauma in the brain over a prolonged period of time through a childhood upbringing is similar to PTSD.
Questions to answer in the comments section:
What is one thing you learned from listening to this video?
What is one takeaway you can apply to your personal healing process?
Remember to leave a comment. What is your takeaway from this video?
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☑️ Take The Four Attachment Distress Responses Quiz:
www.alanrobarge.com/adrquiz
☑️ Learn about The Four Attachment Distress Responses Course: www.healingattachmenttrauma.c...
☑️ Learn about Improve Your Relationships Community:
www.alanrobarge.com/community
☑️ Learn about Grieving and Pet Loss Course: Coming Soon
www.healingattachmenttrauma.c...
☑️ Learn about Healing Heartbreak Course: Coming Soon
☑️ Learn about my new book: Coming Soon
☑️ Follow me on Instagram:
@alan_robarge_psychotherapist
/ alan_robarge_psychothe...
☑️ Check out my website:
www.alanrobarge.com
☑️ Want to learn more about relationships? Then, sign up for the Everyday Relating Questionnaire.
www.alanrobarge.com/everydayr...
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How to Heal Love Addiction - Healing Attachment Wounds
Hello Subscribers:
Thank you for checking out my videos and posting such thoughtful comments. It's inspiring to read your self-reflections and insights. I love how we grow from each other's sharing.
One thing I have learned after years of reading comments is that we are not alone. Many of us have the same experiences when it comes to relationships. We are all trying to make sense of attachment trauma and learn better skills of relating.
Great job everyone - keep going and keep learning!
As I'm sure you can understand, I'm not able to respond to all the comments and questions here on UA-cam. I know this can be disappointing sometimes. Please forgive me. It is challenging to find the time for the careful consideration that is needed in order to respond to your heartfelt reflections. Even so, your vulnerability shines through.
I know behind each comment is a real person with real feelings who's hurting or who’s reporting a triumph. I know you are doing the best you can while trying to make sense of life’s suffering. We are all grappling with what it means to be human. I’m sorry that I’m not always able to respond to your comments directly.
That being said, I'm sharing this post to offer you a few resources in an attempt for us to stay connected. Keep in mind that I do read most comments here on UA-cam. Your words are received. I review comments daily, which serves as a way to organize content for future videos.
If you have a question or an idea for a video that you think is important to explore when it comes to learning about relationships and healing attachment trauma, then I want to hear about it. Please submit your questions and ideas here: www.alanrobarge.com/questions
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Many of us want to know how to heal, how to change, how to be more secure in our relationships. This is why I created the course The Four Attachment Distress Responses.
Many of our behaviors in relationships are habitual - meaning we act out of autopilot. Our autopilot Response comes from past conditioning of negative experiences. When attachment injuries go unaddressed, we become insecure in our relationships.
The Four Attachment Distress Responses Course describes each specific type of guardedness, which is how we try to protect ourselves from getting hurt again, while also attempting to get our attachment needs met.
While we cannot change the past, we can change how we respond in the moment and in the future. This course offers you insights and tools as new ways to respond in your relationships. The Four Responses are Poking, Running, Hiding, and Submitting. You’re invited to take the quiz to learn more about your Response.
Take The Four Attachment Distress Responses Quiz: www.alanrobarge.com/adrquiz
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I created an 8-week program and membership community based on the guiding principle of Self-Directed Healing Work #selfhealers that I want to share with you. The community is called Improve Your Relationships. The focus is about healing attachment injuries in the context of relationship repair in all areas of our lives.
When we look at the big picture of how attachment injuries and attachment trauma occurred in our lives, we are able to begin seeing our relationship choices from a whole new perspective. We gain access to inner resources that shift how we relate and respond to old hurts. It's a process. It's layered. It requires commitment. This is what the community is all about - committing to your healing work.
You are invited to join us. The community members are kind and supportive. We are an established group. The feedback and testimonials have been overwhelmingly positive.
Please check out the link for more information: www.alanrobarge.com/community
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Also, in addition to checking out my course and/or joining us in the Community, please consider becoming a Sustaining Supporter by making a financial contribution.
Your contribution helps guarantee continued quality and accessible content. If you benefit from my videos and want to show your support for the value offered, then please make a donation: www.alanrobarge.com/donate
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Thank you for being a channel subscriber and watching my videos.
And remember, we invest in our healing work because “Emotional Connections Matter!”
Best regards,
Alan Robarge
Attachment-Focused Psychotherapist
www.alanrobarge.com/
Please do not apologize for sharing one of the most profound information I have found on UA-cam about codependency based on science and positivity. Thank you for sharing. Please share more, and do not stress about its length. We enjoy it very much. As you said, overtime it'll get shorter. "Your understanding is our understanding" per se ☺
So so true. This was great information no matter how long it took.
C. S.
You beat me to it ;) I feel the same way. He’s getting at the very root to the issue and understanding it vs treating it at a surface level is paramount to solving this and also not creating secondary injury from lack of understanding. Profound, he’s on the right trail. Amazing.
You said it well! So enjoyed the information.
I agree never apologize for bringing content to the world to help others.
Thank you for this video and I agree is profound. I'm thankful for finding this information now that I am going through a significant point of my healing journey.
Thank you. I broken down crying. I always had this toxic shame of “Me bad” for wanting to be loved, and “Me bad” for wanting to be known, and “Me bad” for wanting to be seen. I’d love to go into therapy with you if appointments are opening.
Sick of people pleasing. I hate my life of neglect.
Pixy Rose Jes...same, hope your doing ok
🥺 me too.. 36 years old and never been seen...
@@jacqielee2744 I feel you.. praying for your healing and joy
Belinda Horne thank you so much. That was a small gesture that means a lot to me. ❤️ I am not OK but I know that I will be in the future. I hope you are not in any of these desperate and devastating situations but if you are, I am here to be a support for you and I wish you the best of luck and all the things that make you happy. ❤️
Me too😭😭😭😭😭😭. I don't know what to do 😭.
I'm sitting on the edge of my chair. Thank you for doing this hard thing recording, it means so much.
You are doing well, I am listening, you are not talking to your self x
Extremely powerful information! Thank you for these "very" important insights!
Agree!
thank you. everything you are saying finally makes sense to me. I am 40 years old and have yet to have a healthy romantic relationship. Now I finally understand soo much!
Alan, this was not difficult to watch for the entire time. So many bells went off as you spoke clearly about how ineffective relationships occur and how we overcompensate for someone who is really not there emotionally. Thank you so much, I will continue to follow your videos. I had a distant father and narcissistic mother, so definitely I will be back for more. Much gratitude to you and for your work.
Painful for me to listen but I intend to heal from my emotional trauma. Thank you for this video!
Lois, I am glad you are finding this material helpful.
Omg this super long video was so healing. It's helping me see it's not my fault it cleared some of the fog in my head. I'm starting to love myself because I see some of my coping mechanisms and not so confused on who I am. Huge Thank you Alan P.S.the amount of awakening and healing I got in this 56 minutes was the most life changing of my 53 years!!!!!
What a great comment. Hope he sees it.
He’s getting at the very root to the issue and understanding it vs treating it at a surface level, getting at the root cause is paramount to solving this and also not creating secondary injury from lack of understanding. Profound, he’s on the right trail. Amazing. Thank you for all you do and caring enough to share this important information. You seem to hold the key to liberation for many who daily struggle with this seemingly never ending affliction.
IAM CHOOSING PURPOSELY THE LONGER VIDEOS; CAUSE IAM GRAVING FOR
INFORMATION and Iam determined to heal from my attachment trauma. THANK
YOU, thank you, Thank you dear ALAN!! I wish you were in Europe, I feel
you are the ONE, who can help me. You have done amazing "homework",
describing everything so precise. PLEASE continue sharing your knowledge
and wisdom. Namaste from Germany.
Franzi Twin i wish he was near us too....( from Denmark ) love to you
To heal attachment wounds you have to find a really well trained attachment therapist. We can''t heal attachment wounds outside of relationship. Watching UA-cam videos can be super helpful in giving insight but to really heal therapeutic intervention is essential. But! And there is a but - a lot of therapists are walking around with some deep unresolved attachment wounding themselves and are not equipped to help another- even if they think they are. Very important to enquire how far the therapist has gone in healing their own attachment wounding.
You are fabulous! No need to apologize for the time. I have learned information from you I have never known before. At 72 years of age, at last I am able to put the missing pieces together to understand my life. Thank you very much!
You received this information at the exact time you were supposed receive it.
THAT IS AMAZING!!!! I am very happy for you...and me too🤗💕
I would like you to know that you are very talented at giving and sharing information to people in this format. Your energy, tone, and body language is not over the edge. I feel very comfortable listing to your work. You speak about information that is so important in regards to how our nervous system reacts and how our brains perceive information into our emotions with relationships. For this I am so grateful. I love that you need to take a drink of coffee, and that you are real in your videos. It makes you come across humanistic.
Agee 100%
Amen
never left a message on the internet before as i have never felt the need ,however this message os poweful and i really needed to hear this message.what you are doing is amazing so keep doing what you do.
thank you ,loving regards and warm wishes.
I totally know what you mean about feeling like you're just talking to a phone on record. Honestly though, your phone is a window to an audience of thousands of people whom you are helping. (Place a picture of a huge audience on top of your camera 😉)Your videos have been helping me so much and are better than any TED Talks I have ever seen. Maybe add a donation button somewhere for those inclined to donate in appreciation for the profound insight and healing therapy you are sharing.
This is a very sweet video, sir. Remember, the more we strive for perfection, the less authentic we may seem. The coffee was a nice touch, because it is nice to see that you are human and not just a brain with lots of info. I thank you for this.
42 I actually did propose to my family that we practice connecting to one another, airing our differences, confiding in one another. I was about 13 and things were very bleak and hopeless and a complete waste of time. They looked at me with shock and outrage and total dismissal and anger too. Eventually our family totally blew up.,My father committd suicide. My mother alienated everyone in her life. My sisters and I do not speak to one another. They still show no sign of wanting to sort anything out or to explore themselves in any way that would begin to change the system.
These videos express exactly what living in our family was like to a T.
Please do not apologize for creating a life saving video. A very humane , authentic, empathic and down to earth video. I thank you for getting me through this morning🙏🏼
Lol you are so adorable - I so much love your honesty, transparency and candor. Your work has majorly impacted my life in the last few months. Thank you for having the courage to make this beginner video ♥️
Dr. Robarge, I'd like to thank you for your amazing work. I've been fighting relationship problems for year and paying therapy hasn't helped either. I still fall on traps. But you are a great teacher and speak in a very clear way so I can take time to understand.
Hugs from São Paulo, Brazil
I am 67, diagnosed as love addict years ago. I have read many books about it, tried 12 step program, went to therapy, etc. Still struggling. Recently learned about attachment theory. Just finished watching your video and I am so enlightened about my behavior and emotions in a way I never have before. Can so relate my need to heal in all 8 areas of focus; but my “Ah-Ha” moment occurred with your explanation of Reality Distortion. I’m sure this is my first time learning about that. It explains so much about me. I have felt so FUBAR for years, avoiding any romantic relationships. Thank you for sharing your much needed knowledge & experience!
I'm glad to hear this video was enlightening for you. Thank you for letting me know that this content was helpful and that the concepts stood out for you. This type of self-reflection is beneficial. You might be interested in joining the Improve Your Relationships Community. The foundation is built on Self-Directed Healing, which means you pick what you want to focus on. There are many resources available in the community that you can choose to apply to your weekly planner. Members reported finding benefit in having a space to share their healing processes for gaining insight and learning from each other. You're invited to jump into the discussions: www.alanrobarge.com/community
Also, since you were interested in this content you might like to take The Attachment Distress Quiz: www.alanrobarge.com/adrquiz
Thanks for your comment.
I am so grateful to have found your content. As an only child that was raised by a borderline mother and a narcissistic father, both with addiction problems, I developed an anxious/preoccupied attachment style and have been looking to heal. It's a long journey that sometimes feels like is filled with dead ends, but finding content like yours makes it all worthwhile. Incredibly thankful for your video.
Glad to hear and thanks again for letting me know the content is helpful. Many of us can relate with this journey.
It can be helpful learning with others who are also learning. Family relationships is a topic in the Improve Your Relationships Community Program. You're welcome to join us. www.alanrobarge.com/community
Wow! You are SMART, well spoken, compassionate. I just keep digging deeper and deeper to understand how my trauma informs my current relationships. This is SO informative and, really, objectively speaking, fascinating. This "distorting reality" stuff as a "skill' we develop as kids... it makes SO much sense, and I feel that it's a big key to better understanding and having compassion for myself. I can't thank you enough, and I will watch ALL your videos.
Anna, thank you for the supportive words. Glad to hear you're finding value in my work. If you'd like to support the continuation of my videos check out the different ways you can contribute or engage:
Take The Four Attachment Distress Responses Quiz
www.alanrobarge.com/adrquiz
Check out the Community unity, Improve Your Relationships
www.alanrobarge.com/community
Make a direct donation
www.alanrobarge.com/donate
Thanks again for letting me know the video was helpful.
Alan, please do not be over concerned about the information you are giving being too dense. I find it remarkably precise and concise. I cannot thank you enough for putting yourself out there, even though you are far more comfortable in one-to-one working relationship. Please keep up the good work!
palefire inca
Wow. Childhood abandonment, physical abuse, rejection and ridicule from PCG. Adopted whatever personality I had to to get the attention I craved from manyone with some free time. Led to being raped, married to the wrong guy and no family relationships to speak of as an adult. I broke the cycle as much as I could with my sons, loving them, listening to them, supporting them. But as an older single woman, with no LTR for 16 years, just a lot of failed nonsense and co-dependency, this video is priceless to me. Subscribed and hopeful for the first time that I can get better and just be a real person. Thank you
I've a similar story and outcome. No family relationships, no LTR with most anyone ever. But most people who "know" me think I'm the life of the party and probably have a ton of friends due to my extremely (seemingly) outgoing personality designed just to get the attention I was never give growing up.. If they only knew.
why do men always need to rape abused women?
they go after the weak ones.
@@meikerieger2899 Prey will often tear apart a wounded animal.
@@meikerieger2899 why do female teachers rape their boy students? It has been happening weekly, somewhere in the US.
Thank you so much for your videos, Allan. Because of the pandemic, I have no choice but to confront all of my traumas and focus on self-healing. I've been experiencing a lot of pain in my close and romantic relationships, and I'm beginning to understand why. Thank you incredibly much. Keep yourself safe!
Empathy to you as you process. Good that you are reaching out and seeking resources. Self-Directed Healing is at the core of the Improve Your Relationships Community. It means you take the lead on what is important to you. It can be helpful getting support from others who are also learning. Start or join in on the conversations. Thank you for your comment.
I’m like 7 mins in and I already know this is going to be so helpful to me. Thanks for doing this.
Wow, the reality distortion makes so much sense... Thank you for explaining that. It does NOT serve adult relationships, like you said, for sure. I really appreciate your video. Please keep making these videos. God bless!
And, thank you for doing such a long video- it just keeps getting better and making more and more sense as it goes on. Now I can explain so much about why I am the way I am, wow. Tears flowing...
WOW... this is so spot on for me, 56 mininutes, so much information that is soooo useful to help find a way through this. thank you so much.
I'm getting allot from your videos. I'm working to heal this disfunction.
Wow. This video kind of blew my mind. I’ve been in therapy off and on for most of my life and I’ve never heard what I’m dealing with described so thoroughly and aptly. I feel like I finally have some answers and a direction to go in instead of being perpetually stuck. Hoping to get a membership to the site soon. Amazing video, Alan!
lots of things revealed in listening to you about myself, very helpful, thank you for taking the time out to produce this
6:56 Thank you for saying that. I agree, it's not addiction, it's an attachment issue.
As a sufferer of attachment trauma... This video was very interesting, and quite easy to follow.
27:13: the 3 main categories of symptoms coming from trauma. HIC
40:00: reality distortion: we become the caregiver of someone unable to reciprocate.
43:36: overcompensation: hight tolerance to the absence of relating.
Yesss thank you. Sometimes I come back to this video and rewatch snippets. So helpful!
I'm currently making my way through your videos. Please dont apologise for the length of this video as its brought everything together in one place, for those who want to understand love addiction.
Thank you Alan, this information is so very helpful. I feel very hopeful that I can find healing through your teaching. Please do not apologize for the length of each video they're perfect every time.
These are some of the best videos l've listen to on the issues of abandonment, attachment, and love addiction
Maria
I watched this video in one sitting. Thank you for giving me hope.
Thank you for this video! I've suffered so long with this and now it totally makes sense. Look forward to watching more videos.
Thank you so much. What an eye opener!! I've been in therapy for years now and you've managed to sum up the essence of love addiction in 'just' over 50 minutes ;)Due to this, I now understand myself a whole lot better!
One of the most important videos I've ever seen. Despite overcoming PTSD and getting on top of C-PTSD. Thank you so much for sharing. First time I've ever been moved to comment on UA-cam!
This video could not help but be long, and anyone truly interested in healing themselves would not mind that a bit. You have imparted a tremendous amount of very valuable insight and information. I've watched the video twice, and paused frequently to let what you've said "sink in" more thoroughly. You are doing much-needed work, Alan, and your aspiration to take it beyond the physical confines of the city in which you live is totally understandable and I'm sure would be welcomed by anyone seeking to break their dysfunctional cycles. Thank you, and all the best!
Discovered you here on UA-cam a few days ago in Dec 2023. I've been binge-watching your videos. As a recovering alcoholic I've been on a self healing journey, and after a divorce I don't want my children to have my issues. I thank you for all the time and effort. And your videos are fantastic and a huge help to my self discovery.
Thank you for the meaningful comment and thank you for valuing my effort. Glad it has brought you benefit.
If you find the videos helpful then you may also like the Community Program, Improve Your Relationships. If you're not familiar with the Community, take the relationship quiz. www.healingattachmenttrauma.com/iyr_quiz_2
You're a natural, all these years later I wouldn't have imagined talking to the camera wasn't something you were comfortable doing. How very blessed we are you kept going! Thank you for sharing your gifts and knowledge.
I appreciate the kind words and thank you for valuing my effort. Glad it has been of benefit for you.
If you like the videos then you may also like to get in on our conversations in the Community Program, Improve Your Relationships. I welcome you joining us. www.alanrobarge.com/community
25:00 It's exactly this clear and sober, yet friendly style that makes your content very accessible to me. I don't need to fend off superstitious, religious and woo missionary stuff somebody's trying to feed me while taking advantage of my trust and curiosity.
You just tell it like it is, waste no time with useless chit-chat, and that's exactly why I find it so intersting listening to you. And you don't need to be an educator to make good videos. You know what you're talking about, you want to help people understand without the urge of showing off, and all of that combined makes you a really, really good content creator.
I actually really like that your style and approach is both conversational and educational. You mentioned in your video that you didn’t think educational was your strong suit. I think you do an amazing job bringing the highly complex to us in a way that we can intake it. I would happily sit and listen in an academic lecture setting to you. In fact I guess that’s what I’m doing by consuming your UA-cam videos one right after the other after the other. I am learning so much and I’m equipping myself with better tools and understanding so that I can change how I view things and align my thoughts and actions and behaviors in healthier ways. I am forever grateful to have found you here. Blessings to you.
Breakthrough help!Thank you!Thank!Thank You!!😊💝I Really appreciate what you do And how your are completely dedicated to trult helping people.Amazing video.
Thank you so much for making this information available. After so many years the puzzles start fitting together and missing puzzles appear. I can see now there is hope and healing is possible. I realise now that I am a lovable person just what happened to me is rubbish and the need to adapt and cope created patterns and mechanisms, of all sorts in my life, that are not good for me. Hope is in that I can change them. It is SUCH A RELIEF as I thought there is something so fundamentally wrong with me that rendered me a completely hopeless case. Not so! Being able to separate these mechanisms from myself is a huge relief to me. Thank you, I really appreciate your insight. May God bless you and prosper your business!
"Your healing is my healing" I just love you man , you cant imagine how much empowering this is for me right now hearing this from the bottom of the barrel.
Thank you! Unbelievable, in a mere hour I gained more insight into my behaviors and maladaptive belief system, than decades worth of self-help books, online research and counseling. The timing of my discovery can only be described as divine intervention. 🤯
Appreciate the feedback and thanks for valuing my work. Glad to hear this content was helpful for you. Thanks for commenting.
Also, you may have already heard about it, but I want to share about the Community Program, Improve Your Relationships www.alanrobarge.com/community This is the type of content we explore in the community. You're welcome to join us as a member.
Wow I finally got answers!! I literally thought I was going mentally insane 😅 it’s been 1 year 1/2 of so many questions running through my head of why I’m feeling this way. I started to have feelings for my “emotional atonement friend” while I’m married to my husband who “neglected” me like my family did when I was young. So my situation is very hard. But I’m so glad I watched this video. Just don’t know what to do about my “friend” situation. But watched this vid all the way through. Didn’t care at all how long it was. My therapist heard 45 minutes of me just ranting on about how I’m feeling and all she said in the end was that it’s going to take time. Which doesn’t help at all. This vid gave me so much understanding and I’ve been going to therapy for a year with no answers! So thank you!!
Christine Wind I’m glad you got what you need! I’m in the same boat with you on therapists not speaking to issues the way Alan does. So glad this video is available to help.
Wow , I’m blown away. I’ve been doing lots or research trying to sort myself my challenges. This is sure an amazing resource. Thank you so much 🙏🏼
Honestly the best explanation I’ve ever heard on the topic. Forced me to go deep into my childhood and yes I was very lonely and felt unheard. Never realized this but also created a false self.
Omg. It’s 4 am and am shaking. Thank you !!!! God bless you
Thank you so much for making these videos. They’ve helped me to start my self directed healing journey. I’ll definitely be signing up for the community and the 8 week course.
I watched it all in its entirety! Thank you so much for your courageousness to stay the course in the creation of this essential foundational video. Many Blessings to you, your healing and your work and my your message reach many worthy wounded souls!
Please never apologise ever again for long videos.... your work is totally amazing, wise and considered.... you have summed up my many years of searching to understand my life in less than an hour, in a noisy and over stimulating platform, your authenticity stands out. thank you very much and please don’t take your videos down. Linda 😊🙏
Alan, i found you at the perfect time! You are saving me each day... thank you 🙏
Alan- stop apologizing the material that you are imparting is so subtle nuanced and dense that it requires this long exegesis if you will. You are magical. I can’t thank you enough.
Much love and deeper gratitude.
Thank you Alan,I am so happy I found your chanel,you are helping me a lot !
No actually all of this long talk is so helpful. The content is extremely valuable.
This was an excellent description and very thorough. You are indeed a natural teacher (despite what you said) and the length and flow were awesome! So no need to apologize! Thanks for posting. :-)
Please never apologize for any of your videos you are giving us the tools to heal ourselves if we have to stop and start back up later you have given us the power to do that by putting this in video I pray that your life is full of every good thing because you are using your presence in this life experience to help so many people I love you sincerely thank you
I find your videos wonderful. Your kindness smooths over any all technical or logistic issues.
I have been helped greatly.
This is so profound. You just illuminated something that I didn’t even know how to name, or break down- and now I’m just wondering how I actually begin to heal all of this in the right way. I resonated with every single bullet point that you listed. So, I certainly have some healing to do. I’ve been feeling so hopeless and this gives me somewhat of an idea of how to move forward. thank you 🙏
You’re amazing Alan! Absolutely well said and thought out! ♥️🙏🏻 you’re doing amazing work. Bless you!
I listened the entire material without any pause it was so important to me that you had my ful attention.
I just LOVE your honesty and frankness ... the material you cover is just priceless to me. Thank you so much for sharing this 🙏🏾
I watched the whole video and Im so thankful. ❤️
Thank you so much for this. finally a video that gets to the root and it not clouded by 90 percent talking about yourself. I am finally starting to understand what is going on with me. it is very emotional but also very hope giving. thank you for making such a wonderful video. I will start going through all of your videos, look forward to learning more!
Thank you for making the effort to do this ❤ I just found your videos and I am starting from the beginning. This is a gift you have given to those in need. I am so very grateful to you for it. These videos are going to be a massive resource for the healthy relationship that I am working so hard to build 🙂
10 thumbs up!!!! 👍
You are getting inside my psyche like no other Therapist.
You are a huge Blessing!!!! 👏
I appreciate the kind words. Thank you for valuing my effort. Glad it brings benefit.
If the videos are helpful then you may also like to take part in our conversations in the Community Program, Improve Your Relationships. You're invited. www.alanrobarge.com/community
Alan:
I would like to respond to your concerns of having a more "conversational" tone and showing more of your personality... this subject is heavy... perhaps shorter related videos would allow you to feel more comfortable with the weight... but quite honestly as a seeker I am hungry for as complete information as possible - I don't need you to make this lighter or less complex... I need you to be as accurate and complete as possible - so please keep talking and being accurate and complete - thank you for being willing to share this information
Yes, yes, yes! I agree, I like the deep and thorough approach to this information.
Yes! Speaking of tone of voice, yours is very soothing as I'm listening my anxiety is subsiding & I'm learning the most valuable information. And I second the notion on adding a donate button.
Thank you so much. I have two pages of notes from this and a new hope. I'm going to talk to my therapist and start working on this.
Thank you for creating this video and offering this valuable information. I have been exploring how to heal my "love addiction" and this is by far the most helpful information I have found thus far. I like that your approach is different than the 12-step oriented system, which has never really resonated with me. This makes much more sense and gives me hope that I can understand how I developed these dysfunctional ways and how to heal myself. I didn't find the video too long in the least! I could hear you talk indefinitly about this subject! Thank you again!
This was the most therapeutic/education and precise video I have watched that solidified and added too what I already felt like my issue/trauma was. Thankyou. I sat here the entire time taking bullet point notes so I can use them going forward with my recovery. Please keep making these long ass videos because I appreciate soooo much the depth of explanation/info you go into and share.
So nice to hear how helpful and educational this content is for you. Thanks for valuing the effort I put into offering explanation. I appreciate the feedback. We can never have enough conversations about attachment trauma. Thanks for your comment.
Also, if you aren't already aware, you may be interested in the Community Program, Improve Your Relationships www.alanrobarge.com/community This is the type of content we explore and discuss in the community. You're welcome to become a member and join us in the conversations.
Thank you for this. Don't worry about being boring. You are not. The info you give is gold.
Thank you for seeing value in my work. Appreciate the encouraging comment.
Thank you, it gives me hope to break the cycle. From San Diego, CA.
Alan, you are preaching brother! So thankful you shared this😇
Oh Dr. Robarge-your videos are wonderful just the way they are! There is no polishing needed. You’re an excellent, eloquent speaker either a gentle and intelligent style sir. As a senior woman in the throes of sudden loss of marriage I can share honestly with you that your videos-your messages- are by far the best out there for healing direction. Thank you so very much for what you do. Many people are eternally grateful.
I love your videos. Thank you for rolemodeling that it's ok to not have everything be perfect. Thank you for your help.
I can not express enough how much you are helping me, sir. My deepest and most sincere appreciation to you💜
Very timely for me. Thank you for your work.
Your content is so valuable, thank you, and we just appreciate the authentic delivery.
Hi Alan, I commented on another of your videos and was just watching this one today---I wanted you to know that I appreciate the density of the information; this is what I've needed. I also love your realness and that you take a moment to sip coffee : D You may have only been talking to your cell phone, but that has echoed through thousands of people's minds who needed to hear this and who you are helping to self-salvage.
I have NEVER been loved...NEVER!
I would if i could.
but I've got issues, sorry.
OH NO!
me too, was used . horrible
Me either. That’s why I have to now. I’ll just love myself.
Alan, your videos have helped my healing journey so much. You are a gem. I love your videos. All your advice and the information makes so much sense, on so many levels 🙌🏻👏🏻💫🙏🏻♥️
As someone who was raised in a strict religious home and felt I was inherently broken, which was then reflected in reality by actions, thank you for this informative, well structured video. The longer the better.
I hear you and know that many of us can relate with coming from a strict home. Thank you for connecting with the video. It's validating when others can understand. I want to share you may be interested in the Community Program, Improve Your Relationships. We learn a lot from each other. Thank you for sharing your experience and I'm glad this video is helpful. www.healingattachmenttrauma.com/iyr_quiz_2
I’m so glad that you made this video despite the difficulty. It is extremely helpful and I’m only 10 minutes into it. I discovered today that I have had issues with love addiction.
glad to hear this video was helpful for you. Good you are reaching for educational resources.
You are too sweet. Thank you for this precious information.
So far the best video on attachment wound I've seen on the internet. I love long informative videos! God bless you Alan, now I'm able to see my past in its naked truth, and what's more important, to catch myself when I have tendencies to overcompensate again.
I watched every minutes of this video and cried at the end. Thank you for providing the language that my inner child could not find to express how she felt. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.
glad this video was deeply moving for you and helped you find the words. It's so important that we keep talking and learning about inner child work. Thanks for your comment.
Your voice is so needed in the world...I finally found someone that can properly identify my issues and offer community of service, product and journey of healing!
Iam in the process of shutting down...but your channel & expertise has giving me hope to heal properly
Thank YOU❤️
This is so useful. The presentation style is intelligent and relatable. Thank you for this.
Alan, thank you so much for this video! This information is so personal and healing for me thank you. You’re an amazing person and so easy to understand.
Thanks for sharing Alan. ❤️ I can't believe this is free 😃
It's badass that you took the tough step forward to put out this knowledge - Something I've been working on with myself. The knowledge itself was helpful. Thank you!
I appreciate the kind words. Thank you for valuing my effort and thank you for sharing my work is helpful for you.
If this content is helpful then you may also like getting in on our conversations in the Community Program, Improve Your Relationships. You're invited to join us. www.alanrobarge.com/community
Thank you - this has been so informative and I am sure as I listen to your posts I will continue to heal the wounds of my upbinging and how I let them affect my relationships
Never apologise, yr giving a gift of your time and knowledge I appreciate it its saving alot of people 💯
I appreciate the kind words. Thank you for acknowledging my effort. Glad it brings benefit.
Also since you like the videos, and if you haven't already heard about it, then you may also like the Community Program, Improve Your Relationships. You're welcome to join us in the conversations: www.alanrobarge.com/community