As an autistic person, someone asking me "how are you?" but not actually wanting to know is what I fear, Talk about fight or flight responce; when people ask "how are you" it's panic because I have to play a double game in my head of "is this person actually trying to ask me something or is this a social thing?" while also having to figure out if I've even known them well enough to anwser honestly.... I just say "it's going" because well, I don't want to be the person who overstays their welcome, let alone get a story told about me on a podcast because I thought I could open up one time.
I have exactly the same problem. Especially if I'm having a bad day. You ever accidentally unload on someone, realize they were just being nice, and then ask them how they're doing only for them to say, "good."?
I'm just genuine and have not understood that some people ask with the expectation of being lied to. I don't find that nice. I'd rather if someone doesn't care, they don't ask. 乁༼☯‿☯✿༽ㄏ
HWHWH same :3 i found out you weren't actually supposed to say (to most people) how ur Actually doin until my therapist told me when i was like 17 and my brain just went O H N O
@@kahlips0180 it’s because neurotypical people use the phrase as a greeting. They’re not so much expecting you to lie as they are expecting you to understand that it’s not an actual question. You’re supposed to respond with the expected quick response. If they’re a friend or family member or something then it potentially opens the opportunity to bring up more genuine answers, but for most people “I’m good”, “same old same old”, or “it’s going” are the kind of answers you’re expected socially to respond with unless asked more questions. Nobody explains this to us though because they expect us to magically understand. We interpret it as a literal question rather than a greeting ritual with expected responses. They’ve also talked before on this podcast about how they prefer when people will lie about being really happy and confident even if feeling negative and insecure because that fake confidence is more comfortable for those around you. So this asking how people are and expecting the generic answers is probably related to that mentality too, which I personally wouldn’t think would be healthy but I think it might be the neurotypical standard. So idk. It’s all very confusing to me.
My workaround has been to be really really simple about how it's going and you cover both. BUT, if someone is walking by you and it doesn't look like they're stopping, this is just a greeting. But when I'm struggling, I'll say "hanging in there" or "getting through" because for me, it's not saying I'm okay, but as long as I'm not in need of severe intervention, those things are true. They're short enough to be a quick greeting, but honest enough that it opens the floor if they ARE genuinely caring.
If you have been training with your hair as is, KEEP IT!!!! How you train is how you should compete. It will throw you off having something different when your focus should be elsewhere. Braids will feel like pulling and shaved will feel like something is missing and you may get mat/gi/rug burn. Hair really affects fighting, especially how you twitch/shake sweat from your face and how it comes from the top of your head. Same for beards, if you had it while training keep it! If you MUST shave face or head(or anything else like legs or arms), do a week in advance so you can manage any skin issues. And don't forget to trim your nails a weeks in advance if your undernails tend to stay raw for a few days.
Aotearoa isn't IN New Zealand, it IS New Zealand haha. it's the native Maori name for New Zealand! it's often used in English too as essentially a nickname/just other name for the country, but in the Maori language it's just simply the word you use for the country as a whole
to be fair to patreon man-it is a bit silly that we have a culture of socialization that requires you to ask each other how you are but at the same time expects you to be dishonest with your answer and only respond with good or fine. not that it makes it ok to unload his personal traumas on you but it is a bit convoluted how we are expected to behave disingenuous with one another
@@SadBoyzPodi definitely picked up on your point! to clarify i didn’t add this comment to critique you or how you felt about the situation-just to point out how odd human communication is! :)
I could go on for hours and hours about the kpop industry and how insane it is in terms of manufacturing content it's craaazy. Love this podcast btw. EDIT: I AM A LISTENER OF KPOP I have groups I like and stuff. But I'm not foolish enough to ignore the issues in the industry...
I could go on for hours about how scary I find it people will understand the industry and still stan manufactured personalities the performers are forced to maintain Like no you don’t love that guy you love the fake person a music exec who has them locked into a torturous contract made. Not entirely sure u ever met. A person
@@Lucifersfursona I don't entirely agree. On one hand, I see what you mean but on the other hand, not all of these kpop idols are as fake as you seem to think they are. But maybe I'm biased cause I actualy listen to kpop and I like the music and have groups I like... but BTS for example started out incredibly small, and a lot of their success actually came from them contributing to and writing their own music and people appreciating that about them. And the industry has evolved more, I personally feel there's a lot of groups, maybe not as well known as the most popular groups, that despite how fake the industry seems they've prevailed because of their love of music. There's a group I like called Stray Kids for example that produces and writes all their music and have found success despite- no, *because* they're self made, not because they put on any persona. But that's just my opinion. I still think there's a lot of shitty aspects about the industry but it's not that different from the problems present in the western music industry.
@@Lucifersfursona hmm I see where you’re coming from and I can acknowledge that I am biased as I’ve been a fan of Bts for the past 6 years but there are definitely Kpop groups that do not fit that mold. Bts for example do not imo I will not deny parasocial relationships as they are rampant in any entertainment industry especially Kpop but there are genuine artists not in “slave contracts” also not that you said this or anything but many others love the narrative of all Kpop idols being “fake, plastic, manufactured, controlled artists” then refuse to acknowledge the issues in the western industry which imo is a pretty xenophobic take (again not talking about you just in general)
@@DanasGoneCrazy I will kindly disagree. Most kpop groups are owned by multimillion dollar who recruit young kids and will groom them from as young as the age of 8. Most of these idol have lives similiar to the slaves that had good singing voices and wereforced to sing in events held by their owners for the slave owner to boast their wealth. They are forced to follow a strict lifestyle to maintain their beauty and undergo hundreds if not thousands of surgeries and other medical procedures to artificially introduce changes to their bodies. Moreover alot are not allowed to express their sexuality or are forced to lie about their sexuality based on what the company that owns their group thibks will be most profitable. Alot of them even have manufactured stories, for example, did the bts guys really write their own songs? Who knows, and even if they did the corporat behind them probably has altered it to the point it can't even be considered to be written by them. Do they really sing so good, no of course not, alot of them seem to lack basic vocal training, but does it matter? The corporate behind them definitely has a team of people that alter their songs to the point it can't even be considered to be sung by them. It's a similiar story to Tpain, his songs are def his but to say they were sung by him would be false (also putting this out, yes I know Tpain has a great singing voice and the only reason he used auto tune so much was to parody the artists that relied too much on auto tune.) So in essence, the person you stan isn't an actual human being but an fake persona manufactured by an capitalist corporation destined for the purpose of getting folk like you to stan them.
They aren't treated like humans fr. I find it especially sad that every single one of the trainees are told what type of surgeries they need to look good enough before they've finished growing, they have super restrictive diets and will go weeks with only a couple hours of sleep each night when debuting, and fans will still point out physical flaws or mess ups. We live in a society.
hello kiwi here , kia ora is hello/a general greeting that translates to ~'wishing good health' in maori and aotearoa is the maori name for new zealand ! kia ora is pronounced 'ki / ao / ra', like 'key or uh' and aotearoa is pronounced 'ao / te / a / ro / a', like 'aw tay uh ro uh'
Just adding. The R is rolled hard and fast, sounding a little like a soft D (I mean, not really, but when you're not used to hearing the language it kinda does).
Maybe it's a hot take to think so for some reason, but Kpop being extremely manufactured doesn't devalue the fact that they want to be artists, and so often it feels like people are blaming the artists for the corruption of their companies. It's a deeply corrupted place, but these kids want to be artists and allow the companies to do way too much, because becoming an artist through self-made channels is pretty impossible if you don't have songwriting/producing/lyricism/marketing/etc skills. People are quick to dislike kpop on the basis that it's all manufactured, but the kpop artists want to be Idols - you don't get in accidentally, and you definitely don't get in without getting hurt (being kept as a trainee for years / having to move companies for better chances even though they may also reject you / racism from many angles / more known stuff like eating disorders and grindsets / etc) so it always makes me feel a little sad that they get treated as lesser artists simply because they're kpop. Anyway this is mostly just a rant and I'm not looking to start fights or discussions, it just... rubs me up wrong I guess, especially because they're kids most of the time and don't realise that being 20+ years old isn't the end of their life, and that taking time to become a musician isn't going to make them Late. It's all a gross catch 22.
Okay but can I just say thank you for wearing socks ?? The other day I watched a different podcast on UA-cam & saw a bare foot . Idk why but it freaked me out immediately 😂😂
The chocolate balls had me in tears of laughter which is great because if I was them I would be crying the other type of tears. The real tragedy as that they never got to eat the cereal
As someone who was also around for all the 90s groups, I assumed BTS's situation would be similar. And it is, but the kpop industry goes HARD. Like Nsync & BSB were kinda of like, the only really big manu'd groups at that time, and that industry died after all the stuff about their manager/producer came to light. BTS is literally the tip of the kpop iceberg. It's also ridiculous to know they grab these children & put them in what I can only describe as some kind of intense idol boot camp. However, I will say BTS is a group that should 100% be checked out. I wholeheartedly expected them to be a group of stuck up asses, but they come off as totally genuine, funny, kind, relatable & a bunch of huge dorks (which I find incredibly endearing). Of course this is all parasocial, but I still feel as though there is at least some truth to what we're shown. Also they're very talented and have some bangers.
I hope Jordan was just joking about not wanting to do the show any more because I'm loving the frequent uploads. However, don't feel forced into making tons of content just for the sake of it-- if y'all need a break I'll wait! Or if you want to do something new and different, that's cool too. Whatever floats your boat.
When I was a grad student, I shared office space with 2 professors, 2 post-docs, and 2 grad students, and the 7 of us would have nerf gun battles all the time. It was a great way to relieve stress. But yeah, some people got annoyed when they just wanted to get work done lol.
I’m from Aotearoa too and I had such a culture shock going to Europe and England too!! it’s normal here for people to go everywhere in their PJs and I felt bad for the people that live there to feel pressure to dress in normal clothes to go to the supermarket or pharmacy lmao, could never b me
i love the way you guys explain things because i know nothing about the nba but the play-by-play explanation of lebron getting the scoring record was so well done that i feel like i do know about the nba for some reason
26:31 as someone who's been a kpop stan for almost a decade (that's weird to think abt wow) lots of kpop idols are definitely told how to act depending on which company they're "owned" by (of which there are infinitely many lol), where they are, what they're doing, how far along in their career they are, and what gender they are (ofc... sigh)
yeah also kpop is the complete opposite of industry plant culture. you will already debut with a decent fanbase if you come from a big company, it’s never hidden
Also @Jarvis a family member of mine had the nose surgery (deviated septum+polyps) and it requires lots of aftercare but it's definitely worth it!! And you'd still be able to record 72 hrs post-surgery.
Your talking about the Patreon office change made me think of my team's experience. I work in a specialized group of legal assistants for a huge law firm where we run a 24-hour operation, and the office we used to be in was this run down but super charming building in Queens. My team was in the basement, but the building itself had so much character that it didn't feel dingy. Now we're in the firm's giant high rise and it is SO drab. I'm grateful they let the overnight people change to remote during the pandemic so I don't have to go in.😅
My husband roots for the Detroit Pistons and flavor flav shows up at random Michigan sports games all the time. The last one you could see him the entire basketball game because he had an all white full bejeweled suit and a giant white clock on his neck.
Gotta admit that I refuse to lie when people ask me how I am. However, it's always a short answer and I never go into detail because I know they're not really interested. How are you? I'm okay. Just okay? Yup. Just okay.
"Oh yeah Jordan is a France hater" No that's just an English thing 🤣 it's in our blood. As soon as babies are born they are shown a French flag and then scared so that they automatically grow up hating the french 🤣🤣🤣 (All a joke but its our national joke that we hate the french, most individuals dont feel that strongly about it although im pretty sure the french hate us more, but that may be a europe-wide feeling towards us 🤣)
my mental health is absolutely in shambles at the moment and I am so so happy to have more sadbays today. Thank you for being on a content high, you both make me really happy and you're both wonderful people. Thank you again
Can I just say how refreshing it is to watch a podcast made by people who (I'm guessing by all the references) are my age? It feels like there's so many kiddos on youtube and they're great.. but there's something awesome about listening to a podcast that I can completely relate to all the way through! Love you guys! So glad I discovered this channel this week!
My son (13) showed me (30) this channel and I have NEVER IN MY LIFE felt so seen and represented by a show ❤ And thank you Jarvis and Jordan for being such a grounded wholesome influence on young men!
re: the first awkward moment penpal, gotta say I once (also in the UK) brushed against a shelf in a supermarket and a wine bottle fell off and smashed all over the floor and the sales assistants who came over to clean it up were more concerned that I was ok with all the broken glass everywhere than angry, and that's how they should have been for the beer bottle situation in the penpal's story too! Definitely not your fault sometimes these things just happen
I think Jarvis you’d like the world of K-pop; I mean, would be interesting to have his take on the industry (specially now with the latest news about the merge/acquisition by HYBE )
A few yrs ago when the pod wasn't super active I would constantly wish it was back so I've been SO thankful for all these new episodes lately ❤️ We're eating good tonight
this may be the first podcast that i genuinely want to continue to watch, i watched my first episode of it two days ago n i just love how relaxed yet still funny it is sometimes podcasts have too many jokes so i can’t like do something while listening to them because i’ll miss something important or they’re just boring but this has a just naturally balanced amount of jokes and just talking n it’s very entertaining and easy to complete tasks with, might be my new makeup routine addition !
Yeah, with the Jeselnik, I was also into the super edgy humor, until everyone got bored of it. Now edgy humor is mostly just saying bigoted things, then hiding behind humor when someone criticizes you
what would be even more of an anime storyline is if lebron's son decided he wanted to beat his father and played for another team to try to overtake him
The office I used to work at had one of those electric table hockey things. It was pushed into the far corner of the canteen, behind a table, where there weren't any sockets. I don't know if it was broken or they just didn't want us using it, but the fact it was there visible to everyone who worked there but completely unusable says something about the company. I'm just not sure what.
Yay the wonderful sad boys are here to be wonderful and sad. You are both so delightfully, effortlessly funny and while you often say things I wouldn't have thought about, I've yet to hear a bad take. How freeing it is to be honest about life and laugh about the absurdity of it even if the laughter punctuates weeks of lying in bed trying to be a person or staring at nothing or wondering if you'll be okay... Or weeks of everything being just fine, too. You two are so thoughtful, keen and observant despite the flippant personas and steady stream of jokes, I feel like this show would be great whether you were the saddest or happiest boys in the world... You're so engaged in being alive, vibing with each other, really just... you seem like you both are always paying attention to what matters, but not navel gazing either Thank you for making such an affirming, grounding show
Jarvis missed steph curry breaking the all time 3 point record last season and it shows (it also happened in the 3rd quarter and reggie miller and ray allen were there and the commissioner and they took a huge break like for lebron too BUT the warriors DID win that game)
You mentioned the Community table read and now I have to watch the whole thing again! This is a curse I must bare. Also, you forgot about Allison Brie. Come on.
Not to be that guy but like, of you already know a person tends to take things literally, don't ask them how they're doing unless you want an honest answer. I have to like, be actively thinking about how to interact with nt people to remember that they don't actually care when they ask those questions to people they don't know well. It's hard enough for me socially without having to mask constantly so nts don't get a little uncomfortable. That said, bc i take everything literally, the "I have to go to the bathroom" thing will work every time on me, no hard feelings.
Man I was an extra AN EXTRA on a show in October of 2022- past the main covid break- and every single one of us got pcr tested the morning before we shot anything
5:40 literally same, I have adhd and I simply can’t remember when people ask. Same as “hey, what’s up?” Or “whatcha doing” I’ll completely blank. My father hates it tho lol
That LeBron story makes me think about what happened to Dave Hampton. Hampton was a RB for the Atlanta Falcons and in 1972 was on pace to become the teams first 1,000 yard rusher, which for the time with a 14 game schedule was actually something of note. During the 4th quarter of the last game of the season he made it with a yard to spare, the game was paused and Hampton was give a trophy as well as the game ball. Unfortunately for Hampton the next time a run play was called to him it turned into a botched pitched and he was tackled for a loss, he didn't touch the ball again and ended the season with 995 yards. Obviously LeBron can't lose any points but I think it's really weird and just stupid to suspend game play to recognize any achievement/record, even one that is unlikely to ever be broken. Let them finish first. BTW Dave Hampton fell just shy of 1,000 yard the following season, but in 1974 he passed the mark again (also during the season final) and after he did was removed from the game to ensure the his accomplishment would remain. (Edited for paragraph breaks)
been binging sad boyz for the past few weeks i think this is the episode that has made me laugh the hardest. the whole bit at the end was fucking hilarious
You just need a trim. The sides grow faster than the top as we get older. Keep the style but just clean it up. It looks great, only looks weird cause you need a trim.
I love sad boys when it's just all that smart ADHD experience of getting distracted by the inner workings of your own mind. And wanting to just explain it all to somebody because you have just discovered something so important to you only.
Jarvis, I wouldn’t be surprised if you would benefit from jaw surgery since you had an open bite (iirc). I couldn’t breathe out of my nose my entire life and had a v recessed lower jaw. I had both of my jaws broken and reset, and it literally changed my life. One of the first things I said when I woke up from surgery was “wow, I can actually breathe”. I do also have a deviated septum, but the underlying structure of my skull/jaws is what made the HUGE difference
The recovery is definitely a mission, but you’d be able to get back to recording vids with a swollen (but honestly not as bad as you’d think) face in like 1.5 months
I got removable braces when I was very young because my lower jaw was very recessed and it helped me with everything, it's so weird how something so small can change your life so much.
i have smthn to mention that triggered me as a trans fem but before i get into that i just wna thank both of u for the great content!!! love u both :3 /gen !!! tw for trans misogyny and general transphobia !!! 55:32 please do not equate sexual orientation to the attraction of a specific assigned sex :( i know this wasnt out of malice which is why im commenting this to try to help educate more ppl as a trans person this is a very othering thing to hear that cis ppl do far too often. and specifically as a trans fem lesbian who has to fight tooth and nail to be included in my own community hearing the phrase "same sex attraction" when reffering to sapphic ppl is incredibly triggering. thank u both again for ur content n i hope this helps anyone make their trans fem friends just a little more comfy
@@Hip.Username hi thank u for asking kindly!! /gen okay so the answer is both yes and no ill just give my understanding of the term. trans fem is an umbrella term for ppl who are transitioning into femininity which includes trans women but also includes non-binary ppl who identify w femininity like myself! in my experience its most commonly used as a self identifier by ppl like me who dont solely identify as a woman but still want to be percieved femininely
ok so im neurodivergent, and imo it makes no sense why you would ask anyone "how are you doing?" if you dont want them to tell you...... like just dont ask??? idk why your acting like this man is so weird for answering your question lemme clarify im not mad at jarvis or anything. its just personal for me because ive done this like breaking unspoken social taboos before, and it makes me feel like im some sort of monster for having emotions or taking things literally... its just frustrating
Fair, as a fellow neurodivergent, autistic 😊 who works in retail ( 7 years!!) and hears that question 50 times a day, I got use to asking and being honest when asked! It’s so fun to say “great” but in my head know it’s “great I get paid to ask you how you are while I slowly scan and care about your items”. But I definitely know not to ask coworkers during lunch break how they are!!! They like to be more personal and talk about their kids lmao guess Jarvis never picked that social cue part- there are a lot of parts lol
hey hey first off you're not a monster! secondly this was less about someone answering the question i asked and more about sharing intimate personal details with a relative stranger. i hope the added context was helpful and appreciate you sharing your perspective -jarvis edit: i may have also not communicated how personal the details were when retelling because i didn't wanna actually share the stuff that was said lol so that's on me
Hi, another ND fan of the podcast here, i just wanted to say that I totally understand your confusion. I’m glad that Jarvis responded tho, that was cool :) happy listening!
I had a congenital deviated septum that was 90% blockage in my left nostril so - idk could be like that XD I had surgery to “fix” it. I put it in quotes cuz it probably still has like. 10% blockage cuz of how fucking bad it was. It left this weird shelf on the inside of my nose lol. That surgery is worth it tho. I didn’t find out about it until my mum took me to an ear nose and throat dr because I used to snort cuz that blocked nose plus my anxiety made me feel like I couldn’t breathe and it drove her inside. I still find it like. Odd that I’ve never snored or anything like that. My mum said I “growled” in my sleep XD I mean I gotta assume it’s just cuz I got a huge ass nose and my right nostril did it okay lol
You started describing nerf and I was immediately transported back, except it wasn't a fancy office - it was an office that was so hot it smelled like body odor no matter what you did because the CEO didn't want to fix our AC even tho it housed our datacenter also :| but yeah as someone who graduated around the same time, companies being like this definitely prevented me from looking at certain types of jobs because I was like, I'm going to go home at a normal time, sorry, I don't care what features you have but I'm not living here lmao.
To those struggling with sinus stuff: It absolutely can be worse than a deviated septum, and, America's crappy healthcare is mostly to blame for the fact that deviated septums can actually be very severe and really require surgery, but doctors are often attempting to soften the blow (if it's not an immediately life-threatening issue) to those that don't have ideal insurance. I don't know if this helps anyone, but my brother had a deviated septum that he struggled with for several years, probably more like over a decade at least, and he really needed surgery because his symptoms were significant and they couldn't find anything else that was more "pressing" According to insurance. He finally had to go the route of getting OTHER specialists to document the health issues that his lack of sleep were causing as a result of not having the surgery, such as a sleep specialist, seeing someone about fatigue, headaches etc. This was able to give him more documentation and leverage for the insurance company than only his sinus specialist was. It sucks that Americans have to do stuff like this But unfortunately sometimes it's less work than going without the procedure. I respect what others choose to do for their health, sometimes hacks are the best way to get things done. There are some diagnoses I don't pursue, some I do. The symptoms and money are usually what does the deciding.
SO MUCH CONTENT LATELY THANK U GUYS!! its so nice to see you two back in person together and im glad jordan seems to be happier there :,)
“Speaking of… none of the stuff we were talking about” is the funniest conversational transition I have ever heard
As an autistic person, someone asking me "how are you?" but not actually wanting to know is what I fear, Talk about fight or flight responce; when people ask "how are you" it's panic because I have to play a double game in my head of "is this person actually trying to ask me something or is this a social thing?" while also having to figure out if I've even known them well enough to anwser honestly.... I just say "it's going" because well, I don't want to be the person who overstays their welcome, let alone get a story told about me on a podcast because I thought I could open up one time.
I have exactly the same problem. Especially if I'm having a bad day. You ever accidentally unload on someone, realize they were just being nice, and then ask them how they're doing only for them to say, "good."?
I'm just genuine and have not understood that some people ask with the expectation of being lied to. I don't find that nice. I'd rather if someone doesn't care, they don't ask. 乁༼☯‿☯✿༽ㄏ
HWHWH same :3 i found out you weren't actually supposed to say (to most people) how ur Actually doin until my therapist told me when i was like 17 and my brain just went O H N O
@@kahlips0180 it’s because neurotypical people use the phrase as a greeting. They’re not so much expecting you to lie as they are expecting you to understand that it’s not an actual question. You’re supposed to respond with the expected quick response. If they’re a friend or family member or something then it potentially opens the opportunity to bring up more genuine answers, but for most people “I’m good”, “same old same old”, or “it’s going” are the kind of answers you’re expected socially to respond with unless asked more questions. Nobody explains this to us though because they expect us to magically understand. We interpret it as a literal question rather than a greeting ritual with expected responses.
They’ve also talked before on this podcast about how they prefer when people will lie about being really happy and confident even if feeling negative and insecure because that fake confidence is more comfortable for those around you. So this asking how people are and expecting the generic answers is probably related to that mentality too, which I personally wouldn’t think would be healthy but I think it might be the neurotypical standard. So idk. It’s all very confusing to me.
My workaround has been to be really really simple about how it's going and you cover both. BUT, if someone is walking by you and it doesn't look like they're stopping, this is just a greeting. But when I'm struggling, I'll say "hanging in there" or "getting through" because for me, it's not saying I'm okay, but as long as I'm not in need of severe intervention, those things are true. They're short enough to be a quick greeting, but honest enough that it opens the floor if they ARE genuinely caring.
Jordan’s story about stepping on his mum’s nose after she got surgery sent me into orbit! His poor mum
That story makes me so glad I don’t have kids
Jarvis’ face too hahahha
If you have been training with your hair as is, KEEP IT!!!! How you train is how you should compete. It will throw you off having something different when your focus should be elsewhere. Braids will feel like pulling and shaved will feel like something is missing and you may get mat/gi/rug burn. Hair really affects fighting, especially how you twitch/shake sweat from your face and how it comes from the top of your head. Same for beards, if you had it while training keep it! If you MUST shave face or head(or anything else like legs or arms), do a week in advance so you can manage any skin issues. And don't forget to trim your nails a weeks in advance if your undernails tend to stay raw for a few days.
this is pretty good advice, nice
Braids might make you more aggressive because of the pain on your scalp lol
Whenever I get my 24 inch mid back braids I feel like killing whoever talks to me for like a week
How are we so lucky to have so much sad boyz 😁
We are not worthy
Aotearoa isn't IN New Zealand, it IS New Zealand haha. it's the native Maori name for New Zealand! it's often used in English too as essentially a nickname/just other name for the country, but in the Maori language it's just simply the word you use for the country as a whole
I love that they straight up forgot Alison Brie, too focused on Yvette Nicole Brown. I love it.
God that Kiwi sounds like the sweetest, most unlucky person! Good luck to you, EA Sports, sounds like you need it!
Can't get over the idea of the world's most powerful lesbian being named EA Sports, god bless you EA Sports 🫡
to be fair to patreon man-it is a bit silly that we have a culture of socialization that requires you to ask each other how you are but at the same time expects you to be dishonest with your answer and only respond with good or fine. not that it makes it ok to unload his personal traumas on you but it is a bit convoluted how we are expected to behave disingenuous with one another
yeah maybe i undersold the unloading super personal information with a stranger element because that was supposed to be the focus
@@SadBoyzPodi definitely picked up on your point! to clarify i didn’t add this comment to critique you or how you felt about the situation-just to point out how odd human communication is! :)
I am going through a rough ass breakup right now and this is the perfect anti loneliness podcast right now
Same🤝
True
I could go on for hours and hours about the kpop industry and how insane it is in terms of manufacturing content it's craaazy. Love this podcast btw. EDIT: I AM A LISTENER OF KPOP I have groups I like and stuff. But I'm not foolish enough to ignore the issues in the industry...
I could go on for hours about how scary I find it people will understand the industry and still stan manufactured personalities the performers are forced to maintain
Like no you don’t love that guy you love the fake person a music exec who has them locked into a torturous contract made. Not entirely sure u ever met. A person
@@Lucifersfursona I don't entirely agree. On one hand, I see what you mean but on the other hand, not all of these kpop idols are as fake as you seem to think they are. But maybe I'm biased cause I actualy listen to kpop and I like the music and have groups I like... but BTS for example started out incredibly small, and a lot of their success actually came from them contributing to and writing their own music and people appreciating that about them. And the industry has evolved more, I personally feel there's a lot of groups, maybe not as well known as the most popular groups, that despite how fake the industry seems they've prevailed because of their love of music. There's a group I like called Stray Kids for example that produces and writes all their music and have found success despite- no, *because* they're self made, not because they put on any persona. But that's just my opinion. I still think there's a lot of shitty aspects about the industry but it's not that different from the problems present in the western music industry.
@@Lucifersfursona hmm I see where you’re coming from and I can acknowledge that I am biased as I’ve been a fan of Bts for the past 6 years but there are definitely Kpop groups that do not fit that mold. Bts for example do not imo I will not deny parasocial relationships as they are rampant in any entertainment industry especially Kpop but there are genuine artists not in “slave contracts” also not that you said this or anything but many others love the narrative of all Kpop idols being “fake, plastic, manufactured, controlled artists” then refuse to acknowledge the issues in the western industry which imo is a pretty xenophobic take (again not talking about you just in general)
@@DanasGoneCrazy I will kindly disagree. Most kpop groups are owned by multimillion dollar who recruit young kids and will groom them from as young as the age of 8.
Most of these idol have lives similiar to the slaves that had good singing voices and wereforced to sing in events held by their owners for the slave owner to boast their wealth.
They are forced to follow a strict lifestyle to maintain their beauty and undergo hundreds if not thousands of surgeries and other medical procedures to artificially introduce changes to their bodies.
Moreover alot are not allowed to express their sexuality or are forced to lie about their sexuality based on what the company that owns their group thibks will be most profitable.
Alot of them even have manufactured stories, for example, did the bts guys really write their own songs? Who knows, and even if they did the corporat behind them probably has altered it to the point it can't even be considered to be written by them.
Do they really sing so good, no of course not, alot of them seem to lack basic vocal training, but does it matter? The corporate behind them definitely has a team of people that alter their songs to the point it can't even be considered to be sung by them.
It's a similiar story to Tpain, his songs are def his but to say they were sung by him would be false (also putting this out, yes I know Tpain has a great singing voice and the only reason he used auto tune so much was to parody the artists that relied too much on auto tune.)
So in essence, the person you stan isn't an actual human being but an fake persona manufactured by an capitalist corporation destined for the purpose of getting folk like you to stan them.
They aren't treated like humans fr. I find it especially sad that every single one of the trainees are told what type of surgeries they need to look good enough before they've finished growing, they have super restrictive diets and will go weeks with only a couple hours of sleep each night when debuting, and fans will still point out physical flaws or mess ups. We live in a society.
This week was perhaps the PERFECT time for me to start listening to Sad Boyz
hello kiwi here , kia ora is hello/a general greeting that translates to ~'wishing good health' in maori and aotearoa is the maori name for new zealand !
kia ora is pronounced 'ki / ao / ra', like 'key or uh'
and aotearoa is pronounced 'ao / te / a / ro / a', like 'aw tay uh ro uh'
Just adding. The R is rolled hard and fast, sounding a little like a soft D (I mean, not really, but when you're not used to hearing the language it kinda does).
Maybe it's a hot take to think so for some reason, but Kpop being extremely manufactured doesn't devalue the fact that they want to be artists, and so often it feels like people are blaming the artists for the corruption of their companies. It's a deeply corrupted place, but these kids want to be artists and allow the companies to do way too much, because becoming an artist through self-made channels is pretty impossible if you don't have songwriting/producing/lyricism/marketing/etc skills.
People are quick to dislike kpop on the basis that it's all manufactured, but the kpop artists want to be Idols - you don't get in accidentally, and you definitely don't get in without getting hurt (being kept as a trainee for years / having to move companies for better chances even though they may also reject you / racism from many angles / more known stuff like eating disorders and grindsets / etc) so it always makes me feel a little sad that they get treated as lesser artists simply because they're kpop.
Anyway this is mostly just a rant and I'm not looking to start fights or discussions, it just... rubs me up wrong I guess, especially because they're kids most of the time and don't realise that being 20+ years old isn't the end of their life, and that taking time to become a musician isn't going to make them Late. It's all a gross catch 22.
The fact that Jarvis has NSYNC records is incredible! Donald Glover or Lance Bass on a ep would be the dopest thing ever! Love them both!
Okay but can I just say thank you for wearing socks ?? The other day I watched a different podcast on UA-cam & saw a bare foot . Idk why but it freaked me out immediately 😂😂
The chocolate balls had me in tears of laughter which is great because if I was them I would be crying the other type of tears. The real tragedy as that they never got to eat the cereal
As someone who was also around for all the 90s groups, I assumed BTS's situation would be similar. And it is, but the kpop industry goes HARD. Like Nsync & BSB were kinda of like, the only really big manu'd groups at that time, and that industry died after all the stuff about their manager/producer came to light. BTS is literally the tip of the kpop iceberg. It's also ridiculous to know they grab these children & put them in what I can only describe as some kind of intense idol boot camp. However, I will say BTS is a group that should 100% be checked out. I wholeheartedly expected them to be a group of stuck up asses, but they come off as totally genuine, funny, kind, relatable & a bunch of huge dorks (which I find incredibly endearing). Of course this is all parasocial, but I still feel as though there is at least some truth to what we're shown. Also they're very talented and have some bangers.
I hope Jordan was just joking about not wanting to do the show any more because I'm loving the frequent uploads. However, don't feel forced into making tons of content just for the sake of it-- if y'all need a break I'll wait! Or if you want to do something new and different, that's cool too. Whatever floats your boat.
criss👏🏻cross👏🏻applesauce👏🏻 sad boyz on the couch 👏🏻
When I was a grad student, I shared office space with 2 professors, 2 post-docs, and 2 grad students, and the 7 of us would have nerf gun battles all the time. It was a great way to relieve stress. But yeah, some people got annoyed when they just wanted to get work done lol.
14:05 hearing Jarvis talk about Eurovision would make me so happy
😁
Ohhh my god Jordan reenacting watching in terror from the doorway complete with ridiculous pose has got me falling out
I’m from Aotearoa too and I had such a culture shock going to Europe and England too!! it’s normal here for people to go everywhere in their PJs and I felt bad for the people that live there to feel pressure to dress in normal clothes to go to the supermarket or pharmacy lmao, could never b me
i love the way you guys explain things because i know nothing about the nba but the play-by-play explanation of lebron getting the scoring record was so well done that i feel like i do know about the nba for some reason
FYI Aotearoa is pronounced like "Ow-tey-ah-roe-ah" and is the Maori (indigenous peoples) name for the country :))
26:31 as someone who's been a kpop stan for almost a decade (that's weird to think abt wow) lots of kpop idols are definitely told how to act depending on which company they're "owned" by (of which there are infinitely many lol), where they are, what they're doing, how far along in their career they are, and what gender they are (ofc... sigh)
yeah also kpop is the complete opposite of industry plant culture. you will already debut with a decent fanbase if you come from a big company, it’s never hidden
Also @Jarvis a family member of mine had the nose surgery (deviated septum+polyps) and it requires lots of aftercare but it's definitely worth it!! And you'd still be able to record 72 hrs post-surgery.
Your talking about the Patreon office change made me think of my team's experience. I work in a specialized group of legal assistants for a huge law firm where we run a 24-hour operation, and the office we used to be in was this run down but super charming building in Queens. My team was in the basement, but the building itself had so much character that it didn't feel dingy. Now we're in the firm's giant high rise and it is SO drab. I'm grateful they let the overnight people change to remote during the pandemic so I don't have to go in.😅
I'm so proud of Jordan for finally learning how to hold a mic
I love the NSYNC lore. I was Team BSB growing up, but still, good content. 10/10, please continue.
My husband roots for the Detroit Pistons and flavor flav shows up at random Michigan sports games all the time. The last one you could see him the entire basketball game because he had an all white full bejeweled suit and a giant white clock on his neck.
Glad that he hasn't changed a bit like omg that's hilarious
Gotta admit that I refuse to lie when people ask me how I am. However, it's always a short answer and I never go into detail because I know they're not really interested.
How are you?
I'm okay.
Just okay?
Yup. Just okay.
"Oh yeah Jordan is a France hater"
No that's just an English thing 🤣 it's in our blood. As soon as babies are born they are shown a French flag and then scared so that they automatically grow up hating the french 🤣🤣🤣
(All a joke but its our national joke that we hate the french, most individuals dont feel that strongly about it although im pretty sure the french hate us more, but that may be a europe-wide feeling towards us 🤣)
I’m French and it’s true we often joke about hating the English 😄
But those last minutes felt hurtful 😔
my mental health is absolutely in shambles at the moment and I am so so happy to have more sadbays today. Thank you for being on a content high, you both make me really happy and you're both wonderful people. Thank you again
Hope you're doing well 💝
@@frosty_teacup I am doing so good! I hope you're doing well too 🥰
@@_b_o_ring I'm so glad to hear that!! I'm recovering from covid right now but I'm doing well overall! Sending good vibes 🤪✨
can confirm there is at least one sheep in georgia, my dad used to work at the atlanta history center and they had some
sad boyz keeps getting better and better
Can I just say how refreshing it is to watch a podcast made by people who (I'm guessing by all the references) are my age? It feels like there's so many kiddos on youtube and they're great.. but there's something awesome about listening to a podcast that I can completely relate to all the way through! Love you guys! So glad I discovered this channel this week!
My son (13) showed me (30) this channel and I have NEVER IN MY LIFE felt so seen and represented by a show ❤ And thank you Jarvis and Jordan for being such a grounded wholesome influence on young men!
re: the first awkward moment penpal, gotta say I once (also in the UK) brushed against a shelf in a supermarket and a wine bottle fell off and smashed all over the floor and the sales assistants who came over to clean it up were more concerned that I was ok with all the broken glass everywhere than angry, and that's how they should have been for the beer bottle situation in the penpal's story too! Definitely not your fault sometimes these things just happen
I think Jarvis you’d like the world of K-pop; I mean, would be interesting to have his take on the industry (specially now with the latest news about the merge/acquisition by HYBE )
I second this!
A few yrs ago when the pod wasn't super active I would constantly wish it was back so I've been SO thankful for all these new episodes lately ❤️ We're eating good tonight
It’s been a tough few days and the Boyz are getting me through 💙
I cant describe how much i love this show, it makes bad days so much more bearable and good days even greater
The last time I commented was probably in 6th grade i feel gross 😟
this may be the first podcast that i genuinely want to continue to watch, i watched my first episode of it two days ago n i just love how relaxed yet still funny it is sometimes podcasts have too many jokes so i can’t like do something while listening to them because i’ll miss something important or they’re just boring but this has a just naturally balanced amount of jokes and just talking n it’s very entertaining and easy to complete tasks with, might be my new makeup routine addition !
Yeah, with the Jeselnik, I was also into the super edgy humor, until everyone got bored of it. Now edgy humor is mostly just saying bigoted things, then hiding behind humor when someone criticizes you
Hell yeah, new Sad Boyz, let's gooooo
Sipping coffee but spilling tea. Absolute icons.
what would be even more of an anime storyline is if lebron's son decided he wanted to beat his father and played for another team to try to overtake him
you guys have great faces we love to see ur faces we love your faces
The office I used to work at had one of those electric table hockey things. It was pushed into the far corner of the canteen, behind a table, where there weren't any sockets. I don't know if it was broken or they just didn't want us using it, but the fact it was there visible to everyone who worked there but completely unusable says something about the company. I'm just not sure what.
never thought I'd feel this bad for EA Sports
Okay but the millions of little topics the video is broken into is just what happens when two people with ADHD talk
Yay the wonderful sad boys are here to be wonderful and sad.
You are both so delightfully, effortlessly funny and while you often say things I wouldn't have thought about, I've yet to hear a bad take.
How freeing it is to be honest about life and laugh about the absurdity of it even if the laughter punctuates weeks of lying in bed trying to be a person or staring at nothing or wondering if you'll be okay... Or weeks of everything being just fine, too.
You two are so thoughtful, keen and observant despite the flippant personas and steady stream of jokes, I feel like this show would be great whether you were the saddest or happiest boys in the world...
You're so engaged in being alive, vibing with each other, really just... you seem like you both are always paying attention to what matters, but not navel gazing either
Thank you for making such an affirming, grounding show
I also completely blank every time someone asks "What did you do this weekend?" ("What did you have for breakfast?" etc.)
These frequent uploads are comforting af, tbh! Grateful for y'all and your realness (and so enjoying the in person format)! 💓💓💓
Jarvis missed steph curry breaking the all time 3 point record last season and it shows (it also happened in the 3rd quarter and reggie miller and ray allen were there and the commissioner and they took a huge break like for lebron too BUT the warriors DID win that game)
You mentioned the Community table read and now I have to watch the whole thing again! This is a curse I must bare. Also, you forgot about Allison Brie. Come on.
the person only making a partial getaway after spilling the cocoa cereal everywhere is killing me
Not to be that guy but like, of you already know a person tends to take things literally, don't ask them how they're doing unless you want an honest answer. I have to like, be actively thinking about how to interact with nt people to remember that they don't actually care when they ask those questions to people they don't know well. It's hard enough for me socially without having to mask constantly so nts don't get a little uncomfortable. That said, bc i take everything literally, the "I have to go to the bathroom" thing will work every time on me, no hard feelings.
OH NO WAYYY i didnt even realise u JUST posted this! Episode seems great already ❤️
40:36 flashbacks to when I was 4 and broke my moms nose, doing something similar (I headbutted her in the face)
Man I was an extra AN EXTRA on a show in October of 2022- past the main covid break- and every single one of us got pcr tested the morning before we shot anything
LOL ofc you guys are into Pedro Pascal now (he's INCREDIBLE don't blame you but EVERYONE loves him)
All this sad boyz content is making me happy boyz
5:40 literally same, I have adhd and I simply can’t remember when people ask. Same as “hey, what’s up?” Or “whatcha doing” I’ll completely blank.
My father hates it tho lol
This was the reminder I needed that Pedro Pascal is in the community table read 😄
That LeBron story makes me think about what happened to Dave Hampton.
Hampton was a RB for the Atlanta Falcons and in 1972 was on pace to become the teams first 1,000 yard rusher, which for the time with a 14 game schedule was actually something of note. During the 4th quarter of the last game of the season he made it with a yard to spare, the game was paused and Hampton was give a trophy as well as the game ball. Unfortunately for Hampton the next time a run play was called to him it turned into a botched pitched and he was tackled for a loss, he didn't touch the ball again and ended the season with 995 yards.
Obviously LeBron can't lose any points but I think it's really weird and just stupid to suspend game play to recognize any achievement/record, even one that is unlikely to ever be broken. Let them finish first.
BTW Dave Hampton fell just shy of 1,000 yard the following season, but in 1974 he passed the mark again (also during the season final) and after he did was removed from the game to ensure the his accomplishment would remain.
(Edited for paragraph breaks)
been binging sad boyz for the past few weeks i think this is the episode that has made me laugh the hardest. the whole bit at the end was fucking hilarious
This makes me so happy ❤❤ thoroughly enjoy listening to y’all. Commenting for algorithm:)
Jarvis' Andrew Tate impression continues to be scarily accurate
🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏let's fucking go🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏
Y'all should check out Redmans MTV cribs episode. Mans refused to be fake
Are you SURE? it's not too late to delete this we don't deserve three eps in a week
Def braid or cornrow your hair for the match Jarvis I feel like that'll look dope 👌🏾
I would love to see Jarvis in a protective style 😍
53:26 as a fellow European (and France hater) i totally had the same thought
You just need a trim. The sides grow faster than the top as we get older. Keep the style but just clean it up. It looks great, only looks weird cause you need a trim.
I love sad boys when it's just all that smart ADHD experience of getting distracted by the inner workings of your own mind. And wanting to just explain it all to somebody because you have just discovered something so important to you only.
P.S. I'm sorry for saying 'smart ADHD' I don't know the right way to say 'people who are good at thinking and do it for fun'
You two always look so fashionable what’s the deal
as a spaniard i agree that we europeans are indeed the worst and also i feel very seen by jordan's hatred of france
OMG ANOTHER PERSON FROM NZ LISTENS TO SAD BOYZ
The story about your mom oh no! My brother knocked out one of my mom's teeth with his giant baby head when we were kids. Quite tragic.
Jarvis, I wouldn’t be surprised if you would benefit from jaw surgery since you had an open bite (iirc). I couldn’t breathe out of my nose my entire life and had a v recessed lower jaw. I had both of my jaws broken and reset, and it literally changed my life. One of the first things I said when I woke up from surgery was “wow, I can actually breathe”. I do also have a deviated septum, but the underlying structure of my skull/jaws is what made the HUGE difference
The recovery is definitely a mission, but you’d be able to get back to recording vids with a swollen (but honestly not as bad as you’d think) face in like 1.5 months
I got removable braces when I was very young because my lower jaw was very recessed and it helped me with everything, it's so weird how something so small can change your life so much.
jarvis 32:27 u missed alison brie ur welcome
MORE?? this just made my day
i have smthn to mention that triggered me as a trans fem but before i get into that i just wna thank both of u for the great content!!! love u both :3 /gen
!!! tw for trans misogyny and general transphobia !!!
55:32 please do not equate sexual orientation to the attraction of a specific assigned sex :(
i know this wasnt out of malice which is why im commenting this to try to help educate more ppl
as a trans person this is a very othering thing to hear that cis ppl do far too often.
and specifically as a trans fem lesbian who has to fight tooth and nail to be included in my own community hearing the phrase "same sex attraction" when reffering to sapphic ppl is incredibly triggering.
thank u both again for ur content n i hope this helps anyone make their trans fem friends just a little more comfy
Just for clarity when you say trans fem do you mean transwoman? I want to understand but I feel like most of what you said went over my head lol sorry
@@Hip.Username hi thank u for asking kindly!! /gen okay so the answer is both yes and no
ill just give my understanding of the term. trans fem is an umbrella term for ppl who are transitioning into femininity which includes trans women but also includes non-binary ppl who identify w femininity like myself! in my experience its most commonly used as a self identifier by ppl like me who dont solely identify as a woman but still want to be percieved femininely
@@radiantcatgirl oh ok, thank you! I can see how it would be impossible to label who you're attracted to with something like same sex/hetero etc.
Ripstickin’ in The Atrium is a pretty good album
12:20 flawless jkr impression
Was not expecting to be in this video
ok so im neurodivergent, and imo it makes no sense why you would ask anyone "how are you doing?" if you dont want them to tell you...... like just dont ask??? idk why your acting like this man is so weird for answering your question
lemme clarify im not mad at jarvis or anything. its just personal for me because ive done this like breaking unspoken social taboos before, and it makes me feel like im some sort of monster for having emotions or taking things literally... its just frustrating
Fair, as a fellow neurodivergent, autistic 😊 who works in retail ( 7 years!!) and hears that question 50 times a day, I got use to asking and being honest when asked! It’s so fun to say “great” but in my head know it’s “great I get paid to ask you how you are while I slowly scan and care about your items”. But I definitely know not to ask coworkers during lunch break how they are!!! They like to be more personal and talk about their kids lmao guess Jarvis never picked that social cue part- there are a lot of parts lol
hey hey first off you're not a monster! secondly this was less about someone answering the question i asked and more about sharing intimate personal details with a relative stranger. i hope the added context was helpful and appreciate you sharing your perspective -jarvis
edit: i may have also not communicated how personal the details were when retelling because i didn't wanna actually share the stuff that was said lol so that's on me
Hi, another ND fan of the podcast here, i just wanted to say that I totally understand your confusion. I’m glad that Jarvis responded tho, that was cool :) happy listening!
Ur face is good. Yes, I am drunk. Love the Sad Boiis
5:24 i have adhd & autism and tbh same like i don't want to lie but i also don't know shit abt myself AT ALL, EVER
Sad the Boys don’t have Philz, but at least they got their coffee so they can talk rather than grunting their feelings and other things also
the chapters in this are crazy
I had a congenital deviated septum that was 90% blockage in my left nostril so - idk could be like that XD
I had surgery to “fix” it.
I put it in quotes cuz it probably still has like. 10% blockage cuz of how fucking bad it was. It left this weird shelf on the inside of my nose lol.
That surgery is worth it tho.
I didn’t find out about it until my mum took me to an ear nose and throat dr because I used to snort cuz that blocked nose plus my anxiety made me feel like I couldn’t breathe and it drove her inside.
I still find it like. Odd that I’ve never snored or anything like that. My mum said I “growled” in my sleep XD
I mean I gotta assume it’s just cuz I got a huge ass nose and my right nostril did it okay lol
The *NSYNC and BACKSTREET BOYS documentary is my favorite documentary!!
You started describing nerf and I was immediately transported back, except it wasn't a fancy office - it was an office that was so hot it smelled like body odor no matter what you did because the CEO didn't want to fix our AC even tho it housed our datacenter also :| but yeah as someone who graduated around the same time, companies being like this definitely prevented me from looking at certain types of jobs because I was like, I'm going to go home at a normal time, sorry, I don't care what features you have but I'm not living here lmao.
To those struggling with sinus stuff: It absolutely can be worse than a deviated septum, and, America's crappy healthcare is mostly to blame for the fact that deviated septums can actually be very severe and really require surgery, but doctors are often attempting to soften the blow (if it's not an immediately life-threatening issue) to those that don't have ideal insurance.
I don't know if this helps anyone, but my brother had a deviated septum that he struggled with for several years, probably more like over a decade at least, and he really needed surgery because his symptoms were significant and they couldn't find anything else that was more "pressing" According to insurance. He finally had to go the route of getting OTHER specialists to document the health issues that his lack of sleep were causing as a result of not having the surgery, such as a sleep specialist, seeing someone about fatigue, headaches etc. This was able to give him more documentation and leverage for the insurance company than only his sinus specialist was. It sucks that Americans have to do stuff like this But unfortunately sometimes it's less work than going without the procedure.
I respect what others choose to do for their health, sometimes hacks are the best way to get things done. There are some diagnoses I don't pursue, some I do. The symptoms and money are usually what does the deciding.
So, not european but a brazilian listener here! Maybe I could share some stories too, I'll think of something! Thank you for the upload boys
y'all so need to get brian david gilbert on the show!