I have an estranged daughter. This estrangement has been ongoing 25 years plus. She never gave me a chance to discuss my side of the story and I don't know what she was told to make her want to abandon a relationship with me. At first I thought there would be reconciliation when she reached adulthood, but it never happened. I finally gave up hope for that and I focus more on me being contented with her choices in life. I pray for her, and there's no contact.
I’m grateful to have to have come across this video. Going through this a long time and this validated years of fighting to feel heard about what has happened. The grief and pain from this is indescribable
I'm glad you found this video and feel validated in your experiences. It's unfortunate that you've had to carry this grief and pain for such a long time, but it's important to acknowledge and process those feelings in order to heal. Remember, your voice matters and your experiences are valid. Keep pushing forward and know that healing is possible, even if it feels indescribable right now. You are not alone in this journey.
This has helped me understand what my daughters were trying to tell me for years when I just couldn't understood what I was doing so wrong to deserve the rejection. Helps me be very thankful for the therapists that helped them feel seen, heard, and then gave them the tools to be young women who have strong, healthy, trusting relationships with the young men in their lives. It's wonderful to see the work being done by mental health providers to understand the abuse of alienation as a systems issue.
It’s been almost 10 years and I am still living it. Karen articulates the foundation and the most hopeful path to reconciliation better than anyone I have ever encountered before.
I'm also a mother living without contact with my adult child. This has been ongoing more than 25 years, since she was a child living with her father and his girlfriend.
I had no idea he was covertly working them against me until he decided to discard me. The youngest just dropped out of school.. He had the whole relationship planned from beginning to end.. he was an angry ex husband and he never loved me.. but he had no problem using me.. like a slave .
You're very welcome, and thank you for sharing your experience. It's important to shed light on serious issues like this in order to create a better understanding and hopefully find solutions. Keep shining bright through the darkness, my friend.
Finding this video is like stumbling across the Holy Grail. Everything spoken about by both of you is applicable to my own situation. And I can't thank you enough. Such a complex issue with so many variables. ...... this video is life changing for me. Thank you so much 💓
I'm so glad to hear that you found this video to be so impactful for you. It's amazing how sometimes the simplest things can have the biggest impact on our lives. It just goes to show that sometimes all it takes is a different perspective or a new way of thinking to spark real change. I hope that you continue to find inspiration and guidance in the words spoken in this video, and that it helps you navigate the complexities of your own situation. Remember, the power to change your life ultimately
A marvelous, insightful, compassionate woman. Her discussion of the problem of the TERM "Parental Alienation" 4:50 is very helpful, as it is, indeed "mired in controversy." What matters is the reality of the phenomenon, which those of us who have suffered it know all too well - and those who dismiss the term are prone to deny the reality. Bless you, Dr. Karen, and husband Nick, for all the clarity you bring to addressing this brutal war against the love that never ends: that of parent for child.
Parental Alienation is indeed a complex and controversial issue that affects many families. The term itself may be mired in controversy, but what is important is acknowledging the reality of the phenomenon and the impact it has on those who experience it. Those who dismiss the term may be denying the lived experiences of those who have suffered from parental alienation. It is crucial to have open and honest discussions about this issue, as it can have lasting effects on the relationships between parents and children. Dr. Karen brings
My mom lefty dad when I was 12 mo. I found my dad at 26. Showed up on my grandpa's doorstep. They were shocked but told me they prayed I would find them. My mother changed my name, moved out of state and disappeared.
Life has a funny way of surprising us, doesn't it? It's heartbreaking to hear about the unexpected twists and turns that have brought you to where you are now. But despite the challenges you've faced, it's clear that fate has a way of leading us back to where we're meant to be. It sounds like your family held onto hope that you would eventually find your way back to them, and that's a powerful reminder of the resilience and love that can exist even in the most difficult
It is vital to define a very clear definition of "parental alienation" of minor children versus adult children of abusive or enmeshed family systems going "no contact" for their own safety and sanity. Without that very clear distinction there is no hope of justice for anyone
Thank you for being so accessible here on youtube, Karen. I wanted to get your book, but the shipping to Australia is unbelievably expensive. I agree with you on your wonderful ambition to heal and prevent this condition.
@@PaulAndersonDonegal yes!! These lawyers and shrinks amd judges are using copycat rhetoric by calling it junk science and pseudoscience that is so bullshit what happened to my daughter and me would take a lifetime to say oh I wish I could know here’s what if you go to UA-cam and look up Caring for the HatefulPatient by Dr Tom Weiss. He does this lecture series for this place called Morningside ministries. I think they’re old folks homes, but in this lecture, it even says in the beginning, if you are caring for a patient or even your neighbor, or even a loved one, a family member you know sometimes family members can really drive us crazy or something you know what I mean. In the last let’s say 10 minutes he describes a book written in 1978 the year we were married and he describes four types of patients. Oh my Lord God above you will not believe the total disrespect. And he even goes as far as to say the poor psychiatrist and the caretakers develop these feelings of hatred and that’s OK because he’s got one that says one PowerPoint point because it enlightened hatred oh my God in heaven, OK then in describing this for patient types the patient named big George is a 45 year old, alcoholic man and then he goes on to describe you know the terrible things that happened to this 45 year old guy and they joked about him in the ER, he said, it was terrible and so his point about that was that the feeling that that behavior creates in the psychiatrist is called malice. Oh my Lord malice. I was a nurse since 1974 and I have never once felt malice toward a patient. I don’t know about you And never in 1 million years would I withhold pain medicine as punishment because I hated the person it is really bad and I am really gonna try and sue him. I have to thanks for listening. I’m sure I have 1 million typos I’m just gonna hit send I’m really losing it tonight like a bad panic attack anxiety, attack, legal abuse. He’s had a warrant out for my arrest since my birthday June 17, 2020. I’ve been a fugitive from the law for sending him emails regarding my daughter who was just abused, abandoned orphaned in every way hurt by him and I’m trying to help her get along in life and I’ve written him some smarmy snarky emails so I just got a DWI and because of this harassment charge about emails I mean I get it that wasn’t nice but you know grow up man, Europe fellowship Harvard, trained Consultation Liason Psychiatrist get over it but don’t put me in legal jeopardy again. He had me exiled in the year 2001 I was banished from San Antonio for two years 24 months I couldn’t come within 200 miles of town I had a 19-year-old daughter dating a 26 year old guy who had just gotten out of jail and I had a portrait studio and a little two bedroom one bath house. This is too long sorry sorry you can’t imagine exile you cannot nobody can nobody gets it nobody gets it. Thank you for listening. I’m so sorry that I talked so much. Maureen
Plus he was in the closet. I don’t know if that matters but he is he was I think he still is scared that I would expose that you think I’m crazy? Oh it’s just sick it’s so wrong and lawyers are so expensive I want to file a tort claim of IIED with malice you can hear him he says it twice. In that lecture it’s disgraceful I know I have a case I don’t know.
I appreciate your enthusiasm for the topic of enmeshment and parentification, but it's important to remember that these are complex and often harmful dynamics within family relationships. While it may feel validating to have a connection with someone who understands these experiences, it's also crucial to seek support and work towards healing from their negative effects. Love and gratitude are powerful emotions, but they should be directed towards your own growth and well-being.
All 3 of my kids are partnered with people old enough to be their parents, and have no say therefore. They weren’t allowed to love their mother. It wasn’t even a divorce/separation; while I was working I was being cut down and blamed for their dad’s unhappiness. (He’s a narcissist). They grew up and I got a divorce. Now I have no family and I am to blame because I didn’t know; but I know now that they were abused. I have had 3 nervous breakdowns and I am now accepting that I am going to live the rest of my life without a family. My therapists say I should date and I laughed, rather than throw up. My kids were brainwashed while it looked like we were a family. They grew up with these symptoms and their dad had no friends, so they became the video game playmates and kept him company. Because this happened before their brains were developed I believe there’s no going back. Their dad’s favorite phrase is “cognitive dissonance “. He knew what he was doing because that’s how he was raised.
you are right- you did NOT KNOW!! sending virtual hugs and healing light to comfort you and fill the excruciatingly painful void in your heart with peace and acceptance that you did best you could as a separate individual surviving and navigating their own injustices and trauma 🤗❤🧡💛💚💙💜🤎🖤🤍
Until the profit measure of these private courts is removed, this problem can never be addressed. There’s just too much financial incentive for them NOT stop hurting children. It is a death experience for the alienated authentic mother or father.
I need help. I am involved in a very severe case of parental alienation. I don't know what else to do. No one can help. I have no money. My life is on the line.
ISNAF This is a organization to help parents who are losing their children or who have lost their children due to Parental Alienation please contact the support group ASAP I’m so sorry that you’re going through this know that you’re not alone
Im doing the most powerful and successful method for change in anyone's life, prayer. My heart goes out to you! Would you share, if comfortable, how you're doing now.
You're welcome, my friend. Gratitude and awe for the beauty of life are indeed a powerful combination. May we always be open to receiving and giving thanks, finding solace in the simplicity of a heartfelt thank you. 🌟💜
Thank you! I believe that sometimes the most incredible discoveries come when we least expect them. It's a reminder that there is still so much to be uncovered in this vast and mysterious world of ours.
This is the best in describing how PA begins, develops and affects the child all their lives right into adulthood and old age. And how it causes multi-generational damage.
Powerful emotional abuse is like a poison that seeps into every fiber of a person's being, starting at a young age and weaving its way through their entire life. It's insidious and long-lasting, leaving scars that may never fully heal. The effects of parental alienation can ripple out, impacting not just the individual, but future generations. Breaking the cycle of abuse is essential, but it requires courage, self-awareness, and a willingness to confront the pain that lingers beneath the surface
I also need to mention this notion of evidence . What concrete evidence can be gleaned from heresay ? An adult child having been " indoctrinated " against her parent makes false allegations against them. To dance to the tune of the other parent. What legal safeguard is applied to ensure false allegations are not entered into evidence. ? This is a huge issue
It's true that relying solely on hearsay can be problematic when trying to determine the truth of a situation. In cases where false allegations are made, it's crucial to have safeguards in place to prevent injustice. This is indeed a significant issue in the legal system, as it can be difficult to discern the motives behind false accusations. Legal standards such as burden of proof, cross-examination, and the presumption of innocence are put in place to help mitigate these risks. However, it can still be a
Splitting is an adept way to cope with cognitive dissonance but first, there is a vertical split (dissociation) that goes to a horizontal split (False Self) where the development of mentalization stagnates and it is a development-defect in the mental-emotional development. Mentalization becomes their own enemy with an emotionally unavailable parent because talking about emotions en feelings are forbidden areas & subjects and cause turbulence of anger, frustration, irritation, rage, and aggression in an acting-out kind of reaction and is reactive aggression.
I feel like my soon to be ex husband did this with our children during the entire marriage. I always felt like an outsider in my own home. It was so hurtful and now that I've left the marriage it's even worse.
It's incredibly painful to feel like an outsider in your own home, especially when it involves your own children. It sounds like you've been through a lot and it's important to remember that leaving the marriage was a brave step towards reclaiming your sense of self and finding peace. As you navigate this difficult time, remember that your worth is not defined by the actions of others and that healing takes time. Stay strong and surround yourself with loving support. You deserve happiness and inner peace.
I have experienced both death 43 years ago, as well as 40 years of Parental Alienation, of my respective children. With death, there is a fixed date of psychic injury and passage of time sometimes heals all wounds, even one as most grievous as your child's death. The passage of time between that horrible fixed date experience in the past and today, gives opportunity for insights & revelations leading to acceptance. PAS on the other hand, is an ongoing injury, where the dawn of each new day doesn't only scrape the scab off anew, but it grabs the broken femur that is compounded four inches through one's pants and shakes the hell out of it. If there is a way to heal or accept this dynamic, I have yet to see it. The above is just the targeted parent side of the coin. This evil is compounded by various forms of abuse inflicted upon the children in their cult leader's environment. These children will never be whole and healed, without their missing parent, as they experience parental phantom limb syndrome, with emotional and cognitive dissonance, leading to addiction and worse.
I have also been astranged from my children for close to 26 years. It has been for me like the experts say. I have been to hell and am having an extremely hard time coming back.
It's too late for me I lost my two kids I legally win custody of to a sadistic covert narcessit who stole them then groomed them to hate me 17 years ago.. I'm was just too exhausted to fight back any more. They are gone, one turned out just as sadistic and manipulative as him. The other I have no clue.
my daughter lost her children in 2017. The aunt of the kids went and reported my daughter abandoned her kids . This wasn't true the aunt went to Beaufort and picked the children up and brought them to Pickens county then took them to dss and reported that my daughter left the children with her and didn't come back to get them .dss took custody of the kids and handed them back to the aunt .the aunt began telling the children their mom didn't love them . If she did she would be with them the aunt was the one who would not let mom around them . We never got to see the kids . The aunt went and took a no contact order on my daughter so that stopped any contact in between mom and the aunt . The aunt gave the children up to the grand dad .we do get to see the kids but the children call the mom the b word say they hate her they hit her and both of the children were potty trained before they left now the little girl uses the bathroom on herself she's 8 years old she should know better but she has on friends .she acts like she's the boss .she doesn't listen to anything it's really bad now we found out if my daughter tries to get her children back she's going to have to go through the aunt I don't think this is fair at all because my daughter will never get them back if she has to go through the aunt to get them
Please be truthful, don't hide the truth for your benefits, she's a professional, say the truth to these parents, they don't know what's happening to them nor to their children, they are lost, don't tell them sweet lies.
The family court system won't even hold the mother responsible for the visitation schedule in the usa. . The family court says to her " that's not nice, next case". Why bother to fight to see your kids and spend another $15,000 when a judge only wants to insure the child support payment is being made.
Dear Dr. Woodall, Can you please explain the following: You say that when there is sexual abuse or physical abuse and the child does not want to leave the abuser (there will ALWAYS be a protective separation in these abuse cases), it needs to be explained to the child that despite them not wanting that they will simply have to. Now we are in a situation where a child is being psychologically abused through induced splitting, which is not the only induced pathology in the child in these cases (induced phobia, induced delusion) but I’m sure you are familiar with Dr Childress’. So essentially induced personality disorder as splitting only appears in narcissistic and borderline pd people. These are clinically diagnosable factors that confirm psychological child abuse. Why would it be ok for the child not to be immediately removed from the abuser but even let the child over and over return to the abuser with the hope that the abuser just “behaves” (contact centre example you give in the video). You cannot be serious? Once child abuse is confirmed the only way is a protective separation from the abuser. It also does not matter if the court recognises “PA”. Child abuse is child abuse is child abuse. End of story. You are violating your duty to protect and you know it, so why are you doing it Dr. Woodall. If you would diagnose child abuse in my case and not prescribe a protective separation in your treatment but your contact centre solution, (where it is again the healthy parent who is observed and needs to “behave correctly” although it needs to be the other way round, the abuser needs supervised contact) I would go after your license. I know you only want the best for children but don’t we all want that? Even the alienator. I hope you think about that and that your ego doesn’t stand in the way.
STOP! "Attachment" or "abuse" makes PA "child centric;" protect PARENTAL RIGHTS because all reasonable people want kids to have two LOVING parents! Parental Alienation is KIDNAPPING, Courts pimp pseudo-science therapists for your $$$, so just ENFORCE POSSESSION ORDERS, avoiding quacks and "experts."
@@hiaslayer You did not understand my point. Your POV allows incompetent "experts" to cut your parental rights. Perhaps I am further along in the Targeted Parent category. Please Read for comprehension.
@@markplimsoll you mean incompetent experts like Mrs. Woodhall (she is not a Dr. btw). These so called „experts“ don’t know what they are talking about and that’s why I get a real expert. But you probably know who the real experts are as you are way ahead in the journey.
@@hiaslayer Psychology, if you remember from college, attracts those who can not handle math and science. Except for Evolutionary Psychology, they succumb to local values in each society. There can be no experts because no one can control human variables, not even in identical twin studies. Since, like Judges, the psychiatric and "therapeutic" professions have no oversight nor accountability, families will get victimized by both AND the Court. Families do not need a Court modeled after the antagonism of Criminal Courts. Families need help and ENFORCEMENT OF POSSESSION ORDERS that get closer to 50% parenting time for each. My family got destroyed by a "therapist" who never talked to me, but after three months with my 17 year old daughter and 14 year old son, called Protective Services, who called me. All investigations, 2 of these investigations and one by police (sex abuse allegations!) closed after one interview with me, each. The Ass. Judgelette said I proved my case of Contemp, that my ex did not try to keep me involved, but then Judgelette interviewed the delusional, warped teens and decided I was a monster, ordered supervised visitation, and I had to pay for family therapy but BIPOLAR EX NOT INCLUDED!!. Paid a grand for Court transcripts, and in Mediated Settlement, confronted by the mountain of perjury, ex signed and restored all my parental rights per the divorce Decree. Another lie. Now, "kids don't want Family Reunification Therapy " No change. I can almost for sure win in Court with this evidence of perjury, but it means calling my now "adult" 18 year old daughter for cross-examination? No thanks I make sporadic contact efforts. Silence from kids continues since April 17, 2021 when I filed my Motion to Enforce Visitation. Their guilt means they may never see through their delusions out of self-defense! Thanks, Covid Lockdown, for enabling a bipolar hateful, adulterous control freak.to AGAIN destroy my family, and probably the minds and all future relationships of our children
Ok, I see that we can recognise the issue at least for those of us on the other side of the stick. There seems to be little we can do to break the cycle. Thank you government, you have effectively kidnapped my children.
Would the young person maybe hang with an older crowd, a crowd that accepts them but could care less about encouraging them to get help related to their bad upbringing?
The courts are well aware of what is really going on - these dynamics can be seen at a thousand paces. The court doesn’t want to prevent this was happening because this is why the family court was created and their very primary goal: destruction of the family. The psychologically damaged child makes for easier programming. Also, the money factor. Family court is the most profitable of all other court venues combined. The unregistered securities from each case and the subsequent cases that stem from them is astronomical.
I'm in the UK and haven't seen my children who are just over 11 because of their mother who has completely alienated them against me over that time, Cafcass were absolutely terrible and sided with their mother! I have my children confessing at school that they miss me and want to see me but are telling professionals that they want no form of contact with me. I have so much information that shows what was going on but I was totally let down by the Court system and Cafcass who are supposed to do everything in their power to what is in the best interests of the child. Well I can tell you they don't! It's all in the favour of who they live with and that is generally the mother. I was basically left with no direct or indirect contact and the children will contact me when they want to. Absolutely disgusting. The mother is abusing my children daily and there is absolutely nothing I can do!
Compartmentalization is like building a mental filing cabinet, where we store different thoughts, emotions, and experiences in separate compartments to make sense of the chaos of life. Examples could include being able to separate work from personal life, keeping emotions in check during stressful situations, or even just putting off dealing with a tough issue until a more opportune time. It's all about finding balance and maintaining our sanity in a world full of distractions and challenges.
LOL. My mother sent this to me after this is what she did to my father. She wasn't too extreme, a lot of women do a lot worse but she was and still is very toxic, yet she still has all of her kids because we love her and feel sorry for her. She was a victim of her childhood.
I appreciate any accurate information that has been realised by case studies and research, however there seems to be a huge gap when it comes to parents who have a 50B placed on them for 3 years or or more, what reliable information is there that addresses this situation, that the alienated parent has the fear of their being another serious accusation that could cause the alienated parent to be arrested due to the fact that the alienated parent and 2 children are making the accusation.
Life is a messy and unpredictable journey, filled with challenges and obstacles that test our strength and resilience. But remember, it's often in the midst of our struggles that we discover our true capabilities and potential for growth. So embrace the challenge before you, knowing that you have the strength and courage to overcome whatever comes your way. You've got this.
Hi I want to speak to your about the parental alienation I work in family consulting center And l make A monitoring tool to measure the behavior of the incited parent and the incited child
“Splitting is a term used in psychiatry to describe the inability to hold opposing thoughts, feelings, or beliefs. Some might say that a person who splits sees the world in terms of black or white-all or nothing. It's a distorted way of thinking in which the positive or negative attributes of a person or event are neither weighed nor cohesive.”
I don't believe that installing security cameras in every room of your house and/or in every room of your property up for sale while fearing future false allegations coming from small children is ever a healthy adult response to the adversity called divorce. Letting go in prayer of what we cannot control is hard to do however doing so is not only possible it is a must when it comes to setting a good example for the next generation.
While it's understandable to want to protect yourself from potential false allegations during a divorce, installing security cameras in every room of your house may not necessarily be a healthy or productive response. Trust and communication are essential in any relationship, and relying on surveillance cameras as a solution can create a lack of trust and further strain relationships. It's important to remember that we cannot control every aspect of our lives, including the actions and words of others. Letting go of the need to constantly monitor and control everything can
While it's admirable to appreciate someone's teachings and insights, it's essential to remember that truth is subjective and multifaceted. Dr. Craig Childress may offer valuable perspectives on pathology, but it's crucial to approach any source of knowledge with a critical mindset and consider various viewpoints. Embracing a diversity of perspectives can enrich our understanding and lead to a more comprehensive comprehension of the complexities of human behavior. So by all means, seek out knowledge and learn from different sources, but always approach it
She only describes the consequences but I don't think she explained psychological splitting at all. What is it? No one is cleverer by her explanations I think.
But don’t tell mommy….but she says/did …we have to feel sorry because she…you can’t have or do that because she…she obviously doesn’t love you…but I love you always You come home from work and they look at you like you have 2 heads. Then figure out what they were told in order to try to show it in the light of day. When all your children are spectrum disordered they are going to take things as they are. Since they are grown they will maintain no contact until their dad is showing his sickness. Then I will see them but my grandchildren will be grown and they will act like it shouldn’t matter. At what point do you leave and save your sanity? And that’s why I am not the healthy parent, I am bipolar, and after the kids left I was hospitalized. Their dad is a psychopathic Machiavellian malignant narcissist who is alcoholic. But I’m the one who is mentally I’ll.
This is nice theory; unfortunately not applicable in practice. The supposition that the social worker or institution will miraculously build rapport and recognize the expected outcome that family court is hilarious at best and self serving to keep the therapy racket going. Even the example being used of the father being the alienating parent is demonstrative of the fact of how dads are pushed out of the kids lives to keep the “single mom” idolatry paradigm going.
Well, the beauty of language is that it allows for an infinite array of interpretations. While "gobbalygook" may seem nonsensical at first glance, it could also be seen as a playful and imaginative expression. In a world full of rigid rules and structures, sometimes a little gobbalygook can be a refreshing reminder to embrace the absurd and the unknown. So, next time you come across some gobbalygook, why not lean into it and see where it
I have an estranged daughter. This estrangement has been ongoing 25 years plus. She never gave me a chance to discuss my side of the story and I don't know what she was told to make her want to abandon a relationship with me. At first I thought there would be reconciliation when she reached adulthood, but it never happened. I finally gave up hope for that and I focus more on me being contented with her choices in life. I pray for her, and there's no contact.
@@vantripper Bless you. I have a similar situation… the anguish is such that no one who has not experienced it can imagine. 🙏💚
I’m grateful to have to have come across this video. Going through this a long time and this validated years of fighting to feel heard about what has happened. The grief and pain from this is indescribable
I'm glad you found this video and feel validated in your experiences. It's unfortunate that you've had to carry this grief and pain for such a long time, but it's important to acknowledge and process those feelings in order to heal. Remember, your voice matters and your experiences are valid. Keep pushing forward and know that healing is possible, even if it feels indescribable right now. You are not alone in this journey.
This has helped me understand what my daughters were trying to tell me for years when I just couldn't understood what I was doing so wrong to deserve the rejection. Helps me be very thankful for the therapists that helped them feel seen, heard, and then gave them the tools to be young women who have strong, healthy, trusting relationships with the young men in their lives. It's wonderful to see the work being done by mental health providers to understand the abuse of alienation as a systems issue.
Targeted mother living this horror. It's cruel and disgusting and destroys.
PRAYERS..ONE OF THE WORST INJURIES DONE TO ANY PARENT.....HORRIFIC. PRAYERS ..STAND STRONG
You are not the only one. The pain and destruction is the worst.
It’s been almost 10 years and I am still living it. Karen articulates the foundation and the most hopeful path to reconciliation better than anyone I have ever encountered before.
Died a thousand times..a lone mother. Children are adults now
I'm also a mother living without contact with my adult child. This has been ongoing more than 25 years, since she was a child living with her father and his girlfriend.
I had no idea he was covertly working them against me until he decided to discard me. The youngest just dropped out of school..
He had the whole relationship planned from beginning to end..
he was an angry ex husband and he never loved me..
but he had no problem using me.. like a slave .
Thank you for this. I've been going through this on and off for 13 to 14 years. Thank you for shining a light on this serious issue.
You're very welcome, and thank you for sharing your experience. It's important to shed light on serious issues like this in order to create a better understanding and hopefully find solutions. Keep shining bright through the darkness, my friend.
This video reinforces my views and tells me I'm on the right track, i feel encouraged thx.
Finding this video is like stumbling across the Holy Grail. Everything spoken about by both of you is applicable to my own situation. And I can't thank you enough. Such a complex issue with so many variables. ...... this video is life changing for me. Thank you so much 💓
I'm so glad to hear that you found this video to be so impactful for you. It's amazing how sometimes the simplest things can have the biggest impact on our lives. It just goes to show that sometimes all it takes is a different perspective or a new way of thinking to spark real change. I hope that you continue to find inspiration and guidance in the words spoken in this video, and that it helps you navigate the complexities of your own situation. Remember, the power to change your life ultimately
A marvelous, insightful, compassionate woman. Her discussion of the problem of the TERM "Parental Alienation" 4:50 is very helpful, as it is, indeed "mired in controversy."
What matters is the reality of the phenomenon, which those of us who have suffered it know all too well - and those who dismiss the term are prone to deny the reality.
Bless you, Dr. Karen, and husband Nick, for all the clarity you bring to addressing this brutal war against the love that never ends: that of parent for child.
Parental Alienation is indeed a complex and controversial issue that affects many families. The term itself may be mired in controversy, but what is important is acknowledging the reality of the phenomenon and the impact it has on those who experience it. Those who dismiss the term may be denying the lived experiences of those who have suffered from parental alienation.
It is crucial to have open and honest discussions about this issue, as it can have lasting effects on the relationships between parents and children. Dr. Karen brings
We need more laws in Ireland regarding this . More education needed .
Thank you both for bringing us this information.
My mom lefty dad when I was 12 mo. I found my dad at 26. Showed up on my grandpa's doorstep. They were shocked but told me they prayed I would find them. My mother changed my name, moved out of state and disappeared.
Life has a funny way of surprising us, doesn't it? It's heartbreaking to hear about the unexpected twists and turns that have brought you to where you are now. But despite the challenges you've faced, it's clear that fate has a way of leading us back to where we're meant to be. It sounds like your family held onto hope that you would eventually find your way back to them, and that's a powerful reminder of the resilience and love that can exist even in the most difficult
It is vital to define a very clear definition of "parental alienation" of minor children versus adult children of abusive or enmeshed family systems going "no contact" for their own safety and sanity. Without that very clear distinction there is no hope of justice for anyone
Thank you for being so accessible here on youtube, Karen. I wanted to get your book, but the shipping to Australia is unbelievably expensive. I agree with you on your wonderful ambition to heal and prevent this condition.
Wonderful brilliant well spoken person, Thank you.
Thank you very useful information
Yessss!! ✨🙏🏾✨ Psychological Child Abuse!.The Term has been so exploited & misused! thank you soooo much!
Yes as has all terms for abuse as false allegations are rampant worldwide by both abusing men and women, #PA no different
@@PaulAndersonDonegal Agreed Paul! 🙏🏽
@@PaulAndersonDonegal yes!! These lawyers and shrinks amd judges are using copycat rhetoric by calling it junk science and pseudoscience that is so bullshit what happened to my daughter and me would take a lifetime to say oh I wish I could know here’s what if you go to UA-cam and look up
Caring for the HatefulPatient by Dr Tom Weiss. He does this lecture series for this place called Morningside ministries. I think they’re old folks homes, but in this lecture, it even says in the beginning, if you are caring for a patient or even your neighbor, or even a loved one, a family member you know sometimes family members can really drive us crazy or something you know what I mean. In the last let’s say 10 minutes he describes a book written in 1978 the year we were married and he describes four types of patients. Oh my Lord God above you will not believe the total disrespect. And he even goes as far as to say the poor psychiatrist and the caretakers develop these feelings of hatred and that’s OK because he’s got one that says one PowerPoint point because it enlightened hatred oh my God in heaven, OK then in describing this for patient types the patient named big George is a 45 year old, alcoholic man and then he goes on to describe you know the terrible things that happened to this 45 year old guy and they joked about him in the ER, he said, it was terrible and so his point about that was that the feeling that that behavior creates in the psychiatrist is called malice. Oh my Lord malice. I was a nurse since 1974 and I have never once felt malice toward a patient. I don’t know about you And never in 1 million years would I withhold pain medicine as punishment because I hated the person it is really bad and I am really gonna try and sue him. I have to thanks for listening. I’m sure I have 1 million typos I’m just gonna hit send I’m really losing it tonight like a bad panic attack anxiety, attack, legal abuse. He’s had a warrant out for my arrest since my birthday June 17, 2020. I’ve been a fugitive from the law for sending him emails regarding my daughter who was just abused, abandoned orphaned in every way hurt by him and I’m trying to help her get along in life and I’ve written him some smarmy snarky emails so I just got a DWI and because of this harassment charge about emails I mean I get it that wasn’t nice but you know grow up man, Europe fellowship Harvard, trained Consultation Liason Psychiatrist get over it but don’t put me in legal jeopardy again. He had me exiled in the year 2001 I was banished from San Antonio for two years 24 months I couldn’t come within 200 miles of town I had a 19-year-old daughter dating a 26 year old guy who had just gotten out of jail and I had a portrait studio and a little two bedroom one bath house. This is too long sorry sorry you can’t imagine exile you cannot nobody can nobody gets it nobody gets it. Thank you for listening. I’m so sorry that I talked so much. Maureen
I just love this lady Karen she’s really great absolutely so understandable and I just love her
Plus he was in the closet. I don’t know if that matters but he is he was I think he still is scared that I would expose that you think I’m crazy? Oh it’s just sick it’s so wrong and lawyers are so expensive I want to file a tort claim of IIED with malice you can hear him he says it twice. In that lecture it’s disgraceful I know I have a case I don’t know.
The enmeshment being incestuous is 🎯.
#parentification
I LOVE HER! Thank you so much for this!
I appreciate your enthusiasm for the topic of enmeshment and parentification, but it's important to remember that these are complex and often harmful dynamics within family relationships. While it may feel validating to have a connection with someone who understands these experiences, it's also crucial to seek support and work towards healing from their negative effects. Love and gratitude are powerful emotions, but they should be directed towards your own growth and well-being.
All 3 of my kids are partnered with people old enough to be their parents, and have no say therefore. They weren’t allowed to love their mother. It wasn’t even a divorce/separation; while I was working I was being cut down and blamed for their dad’s unhappiness. (He’s a narcissist). They grew up and I got a divorce. Now I have no family and I am to blame because I didn’t know; but I know now that they were abused.
I have had 3 nervous breakdowns and I am now accepting that I am going to live the rest of my life without a family. My therapists say I should date and I laughed, rather than throw up.
My kids were brainwashed while it looked like we were a family. They grew up with these symptoms and their dad had no friends, so they became the video game playmates and kept him company. Because this happened before their brains were developed I believe there’s no going back. Their dad’s favorite phrase is “cognitive dissonance “. He knew what he was doing because that’s how he was raised.
you are right- you did NOT KNOW!!
sending virtual hugs and healing light to comfort you and fill the excruciatingly painful void in your heart with peace and acceptance that you did best you could as a separate individual surviving and navigating their own injustices and trauma
🤗❤🧡💛💚💙💜🤎🖤🤍
Until the profit measure of these private courts is removed, this problem can never be addressed. There’s just too much financial incentive for them NOT stop hurting children. It is a death experience for the alienated authentic mother or father.
Hero's to deal with such horrendous behaviour.
Best video I've seen yet. Thank you!
I agree, and I’m a retired mental health therapist. She is spot on! I would take myself to her
I need help. I am involved in a very severe case of parental alienation. I don't know what else to do. No one can help. I have no money. My life is on the line.
Please contact an expert or a parental alienation group and educate yourself as much as you can about parental alienation
ISNAF This is a organization to help parents who are losing their children or who have lost their children due to Parental Alienation please contact the support group ASAP I’m so sorry that you’re going through this know that you’re not alone
Im doing the most powerful and successful method for change in anyone's life, prayer. My heart goes out to you! Would you share, if comfortable, how you're doing now.
Me to
How are you doing now?
Thank you 💜✨🙏🏽🌸
You're welcome, my friend. Gratitude and awe for the beauty of life are indeed a powerful combination. May we always be open to receiving and giving thanks, finding solace in the simplicity of a heartfelt thank you. 🌟💜
Amazing find.
Thank you! I believe that sometimes the most incredible discoveries come when we least expect them. It's a reminder that there is still so much to be uncovered in this vast and mysterious world of ours.
They need to acknowledge the anxiety asap ..
This is the best in describing how PA begins, develops and affects the child all their lives right into adulthood and old age. And how it causes multi-generational damage.
Powerful emotional abuse is like a poison that seeps into every fiber of a person's being, starting at a young age and weaving its way through their entire life. It's insidious and long-lasting, leaving scars that may never fully heal. The effects of parental alienation can ripple out, impacting not just the individual, but future generations. Breaking the cycle of abuse is essential, but it requires courage, self-awareness, and a willingness to confront the pain that lingers beneath the surface
I also need to mention this notion of evidence . What concrete evidence can be gleaned from heresay ? An adult child having been " indoctrinated " against her parent makes false allegations against them. To dance to the tune of the other parent. What legal safeguard is applied to ensure false allegations are not entered into evidence. ? This is a huge issue
It's true that relying solely on hearsay can be problematic when trying to determine the truth of a situation. In cases where false allegations are made, it's crucial to have safeguards in place to prevent injustice. This is indeed a significant issue in the legal system, as it can be difficult to discern the motives behind false accusations. Legal standards such as burden of proof, cross-examination, and the presumption of innocence are put in place to help mitigate these risks. However, it can still be a
Supa...in the USA im in a similar situation. I hope to find help to assist me to open the eyes of my ow adult children.
What state are you in
Rochester NY area. Need assistance.
Western NY
Splitting is an adept way to cope with cognitive dissonance but first, there is a vertical split (dissociation) that goes to a horizontal split (False Self) where the development of mentalization stagnates and it is a development-defect in the mental-emotional development. Mentalization becomes their own enemy with an emotionally unavailable parent because talking about emotions en feelings are forbidden areas & subjects and cause turbulence of anger, frustration, irritation, rage, and aggression in an acting-out kind of reaction and is reactive aggression.
I feel like my soon to be ex husband did this with our children during the entire marriage. I always felt like an outsider in my own home. It was so hurtful and now that I've left the marriage it's even worse.
Same thing happened to me you are not alone.
Believe in yourself. They will either see through this or you will have lived your life.
It's incredibly painful to feel like an outsider in your own home, especially when it involves your own children. It sounds like you've been through a lot and it's important to remember that leaving the marriage was a brave step towards reclaiming your sense of self and finding peace. As you navigate this difficult time, remember that your worth is not defined by the actions of others and that healing takes time. Stay strong and surround yourself with loving support. You deserve happiness and inner peace.
I have experienced both death 43 years ago, as well as 40 years of Parental Alienation, of my respective children. With death, there is a fixed date of psychic injury and passage of time sometimes heals all wounds, even one as most grievous as your child's death. The passage of time between that horrible fixed date experience in the past and today, gives opportunity for insights & revelations leading to acceptance.
PAS on the other hand, is an ongoing injury, where the dawn of each new day doesn't only scrape the scab off anew, but it grabs the broken femur that is compounded four inches through one's pants and shakes the hell out of it. If there is a way to heal or accept this dynamic, I have yet to see it.
The above is just the targeted parent side of the coin. This evil is compounded by various forms of abuse inflicted upon the children in their cult leader's environment. These children will never be whole and healed, without their missing parent, as they experience parental phantom limb syndrome, with emotional and cognitive dissonance, leading to addiction and worse.
I have also been astranged from my children for close to 26 years. It has been for me like the experts say. I have been to hell and am having an extremely hard time coming back.
It's too late for me I lost my two kids I legally win custody of to a sadistic covert narcessit who stole them then groomed them to hate me 17 years ago.. I'm was just too exhausted to fight back any more. They are gone, one turned out just as sadistic and manipulative as him. The other I have no clue.
I am so sorry. I can’t imagine the pain. 😔
my daughter lost her children in 2017. The aunt of the kids went and reported my daughter abandoned her kids . This wasn't true the aunt went to Beaufort and picked the children up and brought them to Pickens county then took them to dss and reported that my daughter left the children with her and didn't come back to get them .dss took custody of the kids and handed them back to the aunt .the aunt began telling the children their mom didn't love them . If she did she would be with them the aunt was the one who would not let mom around them . We never got to see the kids . The aunt went and took a no contact order on my daughter so that stopped any contact in between mom and the aunt . The aunt gave the children up to the grand dad .we do get to see the kids but the children call the mom the b word say they hate her they hit her and both of the children were potty trained before they left now the little girl uses the bathroom on herself she's 8 years old she should know better but she has on friends .she acts like she's the boss .she doesn't listen to anything it's really bad now we found out if my daughter tries to get her children back she's going to have to go through the aunt I don't think this is fair at all because my daughter will never get them back if she has to go through the aunt to get them
Please be truthful, don't hide the truth for your benefits, she's a professional, say the truth to these parents, they don't know what's happening to them nor to their children, they are lost, don't tell them sweet lies.
How do you stop it if the courts won't hear this issue?
The family court system won't even hold the mother responsible for the visitation schedule in the usa. . The family court says to her " that's not nice, next case". Why bother to fight to see your kids and spend another $15,000 when a judge only wants to insure the child support payment is being made.
What about where one parent is in prison I think of BBC 1s Happy Valley and Little Ryan...
Dear Dr. Woodall,
Can you please explain the following:
You say that when there is sexual abuse or physical abuse and the child does not want to leave the abuser (there will ALWAYS be a protective separation in these abuse cases), it needs to be explained to the child that despite them not wanting that they will simply have to.
Now we are in a situation where a child is being psychologically abused through induced splitting, which is not the only induced pathology in the child in these cases (induced phobia, induced delusion) but I’m sure you are familiar with Dr Childress’. So essentially induced personality disorder as splitting only appears in narcissistic and borderline pd people. These are clinically diagnosable factors that confirm psychological child abuse. Why would it be ok for the child not to be immediately removed from the abuser but even let the child over and over return to the abuser with the hope that the abuser just “behaves” (contact centre example you give in the video). You cannot be serious? Once child abuse is confirmed the only way is a protective separation from the abuser. It also does not matter if the court recognises “PA”. Child abuse is child abuse is child abuse. End of story. You are violating your duty to protect and you know it, so why are you doing it Dr. Woodall. If you would diagnose child abuse in my case and not prescribe a protective separation in your treatment but your contact centre solution, (where it is again the healthy parent who is observed and needs to “behave correctly” although it needs to be the other way round, the abuser needs supervised contact) I would go after your license. I know you only want the best for children but don’t we all want that? Even the alienator. I hope you think about that and that your ego doesn’t stand in the way.
STOP! "Attachment" or "abuse" makes PA "child centric;" protect PARENTAL RIGHTS because all reasonable people want kids to have two LOVING parents! Parental Alienation is KIDNAPPING, Courts pimp pseudo-science therapists for your $$$, so just ENFORCE POSSESSION ORDERS, avoiding quacks and "experts."
@@markplimsoll you didn’t even read my comment, did you?
@@hiaslayer You did not understand my point. Your POV allows incompetent "experts" to cut your parental rights. Perhaps I am further along in the Targeted Parent category. Please Read for comprehension.
@@markplimsoll you mean incompetent experts like Mrs. Woodhall (she is not a Dr. btw). These so called „experts“ don’t know what they are talking about and that’s why I get a real expert. But you probably know who the real experts are as you are way ahead in the journey.
@@hiaslayer Psychology, if you remember from college, attracts those who can not handle math and science. Except for Evolutionary Psychology, they succumb to local values in each society. There can be no experts because no one can control human variables, not even in identical twin studies. Since, like Judges, the psychiatric and "therapeutic" professions have no oversight nor accountability, families will get victimized by both AND the Court. Families do not need a Court modeled after the antagonism of Criminal Courts. Families need help and ENFORCEMENT OF POSSESSION ORDERS that get closer to 50% parenting time for each. My family got destroyed by a "therapist" who never talked to me, but after three months with my 17 year old daughter and 14 year old son, called Protective Services, who called me. All investigations, 2 of these investigations and one by police (sex abuse allegations!) closed after one interview with me, each. The Ass. Judgelette said I proved my case of Contemp, that my ex did not try to keep me involved, but then Judgelette interviewed the delusional, warped teens and decided I was a monster, ordered supervised visitation, and I had to pay for family therapy but BIPOLAR EX NOT INCLUDED!!. Paid a grand for Court transcripts, and in Mediated Settlement, confronted by the mountain of perjury, ex signed and restored all my parental rights per the divorce Decree.
Another lie.
Now, "kids don't want Family Reunification Therapy "
No change.
I can almost for sure win in Court with this evidence of perjury, but it means calling my now "adult" 18 year old daughter for cross-examination?
No thanks
I make sporadic contact efforts.
Silence from kids continues since April 17, 2021 when I filed my Motion to Enforce Visitation.
Their guilt means they may never see through their delusions out of self-defense!
Thanks, Covid Lockdown, for enabling a bipolar hateful, adulterous control freak.to AGAIN destroy my family, and probably the minds and all future relationships of our children
How do you deal with this if you only get a few hours with them ?
Ok, I see that we can recognise the issue at least for those of us on the other side of the stick. There seems to be little we can do to break the cycle. Thank you government, you have effectively kidnapped my children.
Would the young person maybe hang with an older crowd, a crowd that accepts them but could care less about encouraging them to get help related to their bad upbringing?
The courts are well aware of what is really going on - these dynamics can be seen at a thousand paces. The court doesn’t want to prevent this was happening because this is why the family court was created and their very primary goal: destruction of the family. The psychologically damaged child makes for easier programming. Also, the money factor. Family court is the most profitable of all other court venues combined. The unregistered securities from each case and the subsequent cases that stem from them is astronomical.
I'm in the UK and haven't seen my children who are just over 11 because of their mother who has completely alienated them against me over that time, Cafcass were absolutely terrible and sided with their mother!
I have my children confessing at school that they miss me and want to see me but are telling professionals that they want no form of contact with me. I have so much information that shows what was going on but I was totally let down by the Court system and Cafcass who are supposed to do everything in their power to what is in the best interests of the child.
Well I can tell you they don't! It's all in the favour of who they live with and that is generally the mother.
I was basically left with no direct or indirect contact and the children will contact me when they want to. Absolutely disgusting. The mother is abusing my children daily and there is absolutely nothing I can do!
What are some examples of compartmentalization? Specific examples?
Compartmentalization is like building a mental filing cabinet, where we store different thoughts, emotions, and experiences in separate compartments to make sense of the chaos of life. Examples could include being able to separate work from personal life, keeping emotions in check during stressful situations, or even just putting off dealing with a tough issue until a more opportune time. It's all about finding balance and maintaining our sanity in a world full of distractions and challenges.
LOL. My mother sent this to me after this is what she did to my father. She wasn't too extreme, a lot of women do a lot worse but she was and still is very toxic, yet she still has all of her kids because we love her and feel sorry for her. She was a victim of her childhood.
I appreciate any accurate information that has been realised by case studies and research, however there seems to be a huge gap when it comes to parents who have a 50B placed on them for 3 years or or more, what reliable information is there that addresses this situation, that the alienated parent has the fear of their being another serious accusation that could cause the alienated parent to be arrested due to the fact that the alienated parent and 2 children are making the accusation.
😢help my children
This is what I am dealing with
Life is a messy and unpredictable journey, filled with challenges and obstacles that test our strength and resilience. But remember, it's often in the midst of our struggles that we discover our true capabilities and potential for growth. So embrace the challenge before you, knowing that you have the strength and courage to overcome whatever comes your way. You've got this.
Hi
I want to speak to your about the parental alienation
I work in family consulting center
And l make A monitoring tool to measure the behavior of the incited parent and the incited child
"Psychological splitting after separation." Well that explains stuff all. Of cause they are separated. How does that explain things better?
“Splitting is a term used in psychiatry to describe the inability to hold opposing thoughts, feelings, or beliefs. Some might say that a person who splits sees the world in terms of black or white-all or nothing. It's a distorted way of thinking in which the positive or negative attributes of a person or event are neither weighed nor cohesive.”
Splitting refers to disassociated attachment disorder. Look up dr Childress ‘splitting’.
I don't believe that installing security cameras in every room of your house and/or in every room of your property up for sale while fearing future false allegations coming from small children is ever a healthy adult response to the adversity called divorce. Letting go in prayer of what we cannot control is hard to do however doing so is not only possible it is a must when it comes to setting a good example for the next generation.
Any allegations towards a man will be believed instantly.
While it's understandable to want to protect yourself from potential false allegations during a divorce, installing security cameras in every room of your house may not necessarily be a healthy or productive response. Trust and communication are essential in any relationship, and relying on surveillance cameras as a solution can create a lack of trust and further strain relationships.
It's important to remember that we cannot control every aspect of our lives, including the actions and words of others. Letting go of the need to constantly monitor and control everything can
children are just the smoke where there is smoke (there is fire)
Dr Craig Childress is the truth! He is the only one who truly understands the pathology! I encourage all to learn the truth!
Dr Childress had a bizarre psycho meltdown a few years ago and began spouting frightening statements. I have not followed him since.
@@audra7784 🤔 interesting more context please 🙏
While it's admirable to appreciate someone's teachings and insights, it's essential to remember that truth is subjective and multifaceted. Dr. Craig Childress may offer valuable perspectives on pathology, but it's crucial to approach any source of knowledge with a critical mindset and consider various viewpoints. Embracing a diversity of perspectives can enrich our understanding and lead to a more comprehensive comprehension of the complexities of human behavior. So by all means, seek out knowledge and learn from different sources, but always approach it
In my case my bonus childrenpossi were healthier and a positive influence
She only describes the consequences but I don't think she explained psychological splitting at all. What is it? No one is cleverer by her explanations I think.
But don’t tell mommy….but she says/did …we have to feel sorry because she…you can’t have or do that because she…she obviously doesn’t love you…but I love you always
You come home from work and they look at you like you have 2 heads. Then figure out what they were told in order to try to show it in the light of day.
When all your children are spectrum disordered they are going to take things as they are. Since they are grown they will maintain no contact until their dad is showing his sickness. Then I will see them but my grandchildren will be grown and they will act like it shouldn’t matter. At what point do you leave and save your sanity?
And that’s why I am not the healthy parent, I am bipolar, and after the kids left I was hospitalized. Their dad is a psychopathic Machiavellian malignant narcissist who is alcoholic. But I’m the one who is mentally I’ll.
If you continue to write someone who is 30 every month, and you get no response, then you are harassing them.
😮
My wife and children hate me.
My life with my family is over.
I will be estranged from them forever.
She is unregulated. Sanctioned and no expert
This is nice theory; unfortunately not applicable in practice.
The supposition that the social worker or institution will miraculously build rapport and recognize the expected outcome that family court is hilarious at best and self serving to keep the therapy racket going.
Even the example being used of the father being the alienating parent is demonstrative of the fact of how dads are pushed out of the kids lives to keep the “single mom” idolatry paradigm going.
Bravo!
Gobbalygook
Thank you for your so constructive scientific comment
Well, the beauty of language is that it allows for an infinite array of interpretations. While "gobbalygook" may seem nonsensical at first glance, it could also be seen as a playful and imaginative expression. In a world full of rigid rules and structures, sometimes a little gobbalygook can be a refreshing reminder to embrace the absurd and the unknown. So, next time you come across some gobbalygook, why not lean into it and see where it