That’s what I love most about Tim Fletcher 💜 he doesn’t just accept everything he his told as truth. He examines a concepts validity before deciding whether or not to agree with the message. He uses critical thinking and his own mind to question, challenge and discern what information is actually true and accurate apart from the platitudes and the bs. He thinks for himself in a realistic way, he’s not a propaganda puppet whatsoever. It’s cool that he’s not afraid to discuss things that might be counter to popular belief or controversial, even amongst his fellow Christians. That’s why I respect him and love his videos/talks. His philosophy is authentically accepted by his own reasoning, not just regurgitated indoctrination. What he has to say is based in research, psychology and honest Christian spirituality rather than any distorted/corrupted religious views. I do not identify as religious myself, but I really like what this guy has to say. I am in agreement. I also love how he doesn’t push religion on the listener. So very wise and respectful 👏 thank you Tim 💜
Disagree with his Christian side but love his CPSTD ... Christianity like all religion is Magical thinking think who is drawn to cults and religious people CPSTD people like me ...
"Happy people are all alike; every unhappy person is unhappy in their own way." The challenge of raising well adjusted individuals is you have to get everything right, and even more challenging to help someone who's already unhappy because so much can be wrong.
God Bless you Tim You are a treasure trove of knowledge & hold the keys & answers to many of life’s problems and very important questions. Thank You for all your time and effort, your positive contribution to humanity is profound & everlasting!!!:-) keep up the good work!!! You are a one of a kind and this world is certainly a better place because of YOU!!!
Your note of gratitude to Tim covers it all. I just wrote reams in response and addition but forgot to hit send and lost it all! Never mind. Tim Is a gift from God to us all. The revelations we are all receiving from his insights are staggering. We’ve all got another shot at life and I personally have layers and layers of dysfunction peel off and fall away. Because we recognize his teachings are just what Western society needs it is with great respect and support for his work that I tell anyone I meet who seems lost, discouraged and dis-eased to go click of any video of his with a title that appeals to them and bam!…they’ll start to see the Light. God bless this man filled with the true passion of giving and helping. No agenda, no ego…just caring for humanity!
@@AllIn1Studio I wanted to say thank you for taking the time to respond to me concerning my comments on Tim having such a profound and positive impact on my Life. He truly is a gift from God the world needs many more like him!:-) and btw I can sympathize on how it feels to have forgotten to hit the send button after spending a considerable amount of time and energy to get my mind to extract the right words from my heart, so that the one and only woman I have ever loved would finally realize, that she truly is the love of my life and just how special see is to me and then to have it all vanish for good over that stinkin little send button I know I pushed just not good enough I guess:-( that happened a couple times I learned my lesson after that, Im writing her a letter & praying the right words will still flow from my heart again the way they did before….etc.. Anyhow sorry I was so long-winded I just thought it was funny you have experienced the same heartbreak as a result of that stupid little sand button lol :-) I hope you have an awesome day God bless you
@@WickedWood4U I have discovered that when my male friends talk about the love of their life and that somehow the relationship hasn’t panned out the way they want, I tell them that women are actually much more easy to please than men. First and foremost you must find out the woman’s dominant sense. If aural is her dominant sense buying her diamonds and pearls won’t cut it, but whispering sweet words, saying kind real authentic things - short n sweet - carried on clean warm breath into her ear will! Music too. A crucial one. I have a feeling her dominant sense is hearing. Do you play an instrument? If not buy a ukulele and play a love song to her! If I’m not psychic after all (!) just think about taste, touch, smell and sight. Go from there when you compose your letter. Appeal to her dominant sense. iMessage Neuhart won’t have to be that long if you come from that angle. 🥰
@@WickedWood4U Addendum: In saying how special she is you, make sure you mention how special she is….period. Then add how you in recognizing her beautiful qualities you just want to be there to enhance them , keep her spirit buoyant by being there for her and not there for her when she needs her space. Hope you don’t mind this input. I have psychic gifts actually so…… Hope this helps!
Profound revelations and concepts Tim. Yes thats how I understood marriage intimacy and connection. I've become one more times than Im comfortable with. Lots of amends to make... Thank you for everything you do.
Thank you for these videos. Oh my goodness, will I ever watch them All? I really, really like how you explain things from a psychological view at 1st and then tie it in to The Bible at the end. Everything you say makes so much sense. Thank you . You're a good man for putting on these seminars.
To be honest I have often felt that way but at the same time I feel that I'm crazy and exaggerating, being unfair and really I have no reason to not want to be around my parents. Yet being around them makes me so sad, I feel empty and all the bad things I have felt as well as the unhealthy coping mechanisms and behaviour. I experience all the triggers when I'm around my family and recently I have felt that I just want to be away from my family and I am doing that. I feel the need to have a life away from them, thank God I live far away and I don't need to get out of my way to do it. I just am the one that normally goes there and I feel guilty, like a bad person for not going and helping my mother who often needs help with money. She got two dogs when she was with my dad and now doesn't have enougy to pay for them.
Oh my goodness! The research that Tim spoke about really drilled into the importance of a good community for healing, AND also showed that like humans, animals have feelings and the need for connection! And if they have the same need as us for survival, then we should really also rethink about our food source!
@@ariadne6104me to .I m trying .considering I felt she was my only purpose in life its been extremely hard especially combined with the grief of several betrayals
This is the problem. I can't find SAFE people in these 12 step rooms ...I was deeply hurt and retraumatized more from some of these ppl than others outside the program bc I expected them to be trusting and safe given the principles say we are to be loving and compassionate and protect anonymity.. Instead I was betrayed by a cppl of ppl. Now I'm really disillusioned as the opposite of addiction (to food anorexia ...) Is connection. I haven't yet found a sponsor as I'm afraid to be judged...🙏😓
Its your expectations that were out of place, you were in a place where most everyone is sick (all mankind is) and trying to recover and everyone is at a different stage or place on that path. Where in normal society people are generally in denial and/or ignorant and could care less about getting better because in their eyes there is nothing wrong needing to be fixed ... Nothing safe about that either. At least in 12 step recovery you know people are sick, so you know what your dealing with. I wish you well on your journey of recovery in 2024
I have never used the "clip feature" on here before. I used it twice to make 2 different 15 second clips. I clipped 2 sentences from this video where u said becoming one doesn't need to include a marriage ceremony and entitled them "Marriage?". Also, I have shared many of your videos to some groups on Facebook for people recovering from toxic relationships and narcissistic abuse. I hope they get watched because they are quite helpful.
If people truly want to be helped they will watch the videos and take something from them. All you can do is share them as you have and hope that the people who need them will find them 🙏
I am finding much value in these lessons and I thank you for the time and anointing that produced these, however, I am a recovering closet addict and prefer not connecting with people; what advice do you have for those like me?
cyrusfreeman, I’m so sorry you’re feel that way. I’m a mom myself and can understand your pain. When a mom is sick or going through some affliction it’s hard to cope and deal with children. Can you get help from a therapist, or family, perhaps a church? Don’t do this alone. I pray you get the courage and strength to get help. Blessings
@@carmenkamberos1156 the whole situation is terrible. I do have a therapist and I do have a church, but hardly anybody knows that this is happening… My wife is scared to death that people are going to find out what she did, and as long as I have any, hope that she’s going to come around,I don’t want to let everybody know what’s going on. I suppose at some point, I won’t be able to carry all this.
cyrusfreeman. I’m really moved by your situation. Thanks for replying. thought you’re the mom.Still I see, the complication and the secrecy is an enormous burden for you to carry alone. I suppose you and your wife are talking these things over and trying to support one another. Everybody makes mistakes and should be given a second chance. I cannot imagine what went wrong but try to talk it over with her and find a common ground. Other people don’t have to know except the therapist or your counselor at church. But get it out of your system, cry if you must, don’t be hard on yourself. There’s problems in every marriage and many are ashamed of what’s happening. Try to be strong for your kids and yourself. How to be strong is the question? Your therapist will help you with that, just don’t be afraid to be vulnerable, cry or scream and let it all out; do some journaling, writing down your thoughts and sorrows. Try to eat well and sleep enough. I send you a hug and keep praying for you and family. May God be with you all. Blessings
"The Bible never tells you to have a marriage ceremony it just tells you to 'become one' " and that is repeated in The Bible several times..."Leave your father and mother and become one".
I do the abandonment issues and don't know how to trust and ended up I'm relationship with a women who had parents but doesn't know how to love or deal with someone who has so much trauma. And expects me to give get attention like she got with 2 parents to 1 child ratio. Total miscommunication and most understanding. She can't relate or know how to handle someone so traumatic.
I disagree with his theory on being able only to connect to one of two things 1. Activities 2. Drugs .... I connected with animals and I'm sure there are several other ways people have found to cope with lack of love in childhood that are more healthy then this guy gives us credit for. Lol After all, we are SURVIVORS. Some of us found different ways to do that....
TIM is helping folks discover the REASONS for their dysfunction, showing how and why negative coping skills developed. I think pets are a given in human connectivity. Connection with Nature in general …wild animals, birds, horses etc are vitally important, I agree that they come naturally. He’s so busy sharing the insights he has found that he’s not going to list cuddling bunny rabbits etc. He is doing his best with the topic at hand. He is a very generous, knowledgeable, wise person who is on a passionate mission to share all he knows to help people find inner peace and healing from a traumatic past that has crusty residue that has to be chipped away, dysfunctional habits peeled back to fall away and leave a lighter, happy, functional you! Animals teach us unconditional love and how to listen.
I totally understand that kind of connection with animals but it can only go so far. Trying to apply unconditional love towards another person is difficult but necessary.
I think context is important here. The guy seems to run a program that is specifically targeting people in addiction, as far as I have gathered, so it seems likely either he’s speaking to this audience specifically or due to working with them so long he’s developed that kind of bias (Sorry to leave this on an older comment but it may be of interest to others too)
Still, the connection with an animal can be looked at as an activity. The real connection is with another human being . When an adult you bond with other humans for your partner. Pets or any other activity, or chemicals can ever fill that need .
OMG this! I came for the complex trauma and attachment disorder splainer, but stayed for the deconstruction of fundamentalist patriarchal Christianity 😉
Warning: It's not clear that this guy's prerogative is Christian preaching via a cursory overview of attachment theory and an endless list of symptoms of 'failed attachment'. He was doing reasonably well until 31:46 when he contorts attachment theory into a bible class. What a disappointment.
Thankd for mentioning that. I don’t wanna listen to bible either. I should listen till the bible would be got in 😂 I don’t know why we should listen to any religion on psychology channel, though. The other video which talked about fear turned into bible lesson as well.
@@bingoandtotoYes! Unless he's speaking to Christians who are addicted to something (addicts)? I wonder if that's a possibility. In that case it would make sense if not, it's unnecessary. He does seem to be speaking specifically to addicts.
This ministry is changing my life
TIM, U R... an Amazing gift to humanity!
That’s what I love most about Tim Fletcher 💜 he doesn’t just accept everything he his told as truth. He examines a concepts validity before deciding whether or not to agree with the message. He uses critical thinking and his own mind to question, challenge and discern what information is actually true and accurate apart from the platitudes and the bs. He thinks for himself in a realistic way, he’s not a propaganda puppet whatsoever. It’s cool that he’s not afraid to discuss things that might be counter to popular belief or controversial, even amongst his fellow Christians. That’s why I respect him and love his videos/talks. His philosophy is authentically accepted by his own reasoning, not just regurgitated indoctrination. What he has to say is based in research, psychology and honest Christian spirituality rather than any distorted/corrupted religious views. I do not identify as religious myself, but I really like what this guy has to say. I am in agreement. I also love how he doesn’t push religion on the listener. So very wise and respectful 👏 thank you Tim 💜
I agree with your points. Authenticity and truth resonate and you just know it when you hear it
Same!
❤
Disagree with his Christian side but love his CPSTD ... Christianity like all religion is Magical thinking think who is drawn to cults and religious people CPSTD people like me ...
I absolutely agree!!! ❤
20 minutes in, this is one of the most enlightening talks I’ve ever heard. Good lord
Wow. Cure for addiction is connection
"Happy people are all alike; every unhappy person is unhappy in their own way."
The challenge of raising well adjusted individuals is you have to get everything right, and even more challenging to help someone who's already unhappy because so much can be wrong.
Thank you for all the work you do. You are changing the life of generations to come.
God Bless you Tim
You are a treasure trove of knowledge & hold the keys & answers to many of life’s problems and very important questions. Thank You for all your time and effort, your positive contribution to humanity is profound & everlasting!!!:-) keep up the good work!!! You are a one of a kind and this world is certainly a better place because of YOU!!!
Your note of gratitude to Tim covers it all. I just wrote reams in response and addition but forgot to hit send and lost it all! Never mind. Tim Is a gift from God to us all. The revelations we are all receiving from his insights are staggering. We’ve all got another shot at life and I personally have layers and layers of dysfunction peel off and fall away. Because we recognize his teachings are just what Western society needs it is with great respect and support for his work that I tell anyone I meet who seems lost, discouraged and dis-eased to go click of any video of his with a title that appeals to them and bam!…they’ll start to see the Light. God bless this man filled with the true passion of giving and helping. No agenda, no ego…just caring for humanity!
@@AllIn1Studio I wanted to say thank you for taking the time to respond to me concerning my comments on Tim having such a profound and positive impact on my Life. He truly is a gift from God the world needs many more like him!:-) and btw I can sympathize on how it feels to have forgotten to hit the send button after spending a considerable amount of time and energy to get my mind to extract the right words from my heart, so that the one and only woman I have ever loved would finally realize, that she truly is the love of my life and just how special see is to me and then to have it all vanish for good over that stinkin little send button I know I pushed just not good enough I guess:-( that happened a couple times I learned my lesson after that, Im writing her a letter & praying the right words will still flow from my heart again the way they did before….etc.. Anyhow sorry I was so long-winded I just thought it was funny you have experienced the same heartbreak as a result of that stupid little sand button lol :-) I hope you have an awesome day God bless you
@@WickedWood4U I have discovered that when my male friends talk about the love of their life and that somehow the relationship hasn’t panned out the way they want, I tell them that women are actually much more easy to please than men. First and foremost you must find out the woman’s dominant sense. If aural is her dominant sense buying her diamonds and pearls won’t cut it, but whispering sweet words, saying kind real authentic things - short n sweet - carried on clean warm breath into her ear will! Music too. A crucial one. I have a feeling her dominant sense is hearing. Do you play an instrument? If not buy a ukulele and play a love song to her! If I’m not psychic after all (!) just think about taste, touch, smell and sight. Go from there when you compose your letter. Appeal to her dominant sense. iMessage Neuhart won’t have to be that long if you come from that angle. 🥰
@@WickedWood4U Addendum: In saying how special she is you, make sure you mention how special she is….period. Then add how you in recognizing her beautiful qualities you just want to be there to enhance them , keep her spirit buoyant by being there for her and not there for her when she needs her space. Hope you don’t mind this input. I have psychic gifts actually so…… Hope this helps!
Agreed
I am so happy that I found your channel! God bless you!
Thank you for this Tim!! A lot of things were validated here which is both good and bad and sad 😐
Profound revelations and concepts Tim.
Yes thats how I understood marriage intimacy and connection.
I've become one more times than Im comfortable with.
Lots of amends to make...
Thank you for everything you do.
Thank you for these videos. Oh my goodness, will I ever watch them All?
I really, really like how you explain things from a psychological view at 1st and then tie it in to The Bible at the end. Everything you say makes so much sense. Thank you . You're a good man for putting on these seminars.
I want to thank Tim from the bottom of my heart. 🙏🙏❤❤
Watching this in 2021, wow... I'm only 10 minutes in, and it's hitting me to the core to grow and change for the better, thank you, Tim!
"Alot of people with complex trauma hate their parents but never leave them"🤯🤯
My mum is still married to a man who victimized me 25 yrs
I can see that
To be honest I have often felt that way but at the same time I feel that I'm crazy and exaggerating, being unfair and really I have no reason to not want to be around my parents.
Yet being around them makes me so sad, I feel empty and all the bad things I have felt as well as the unhealthy coping mechanisms and behaviour. I experience all the triggers when I'm around my family and recently I have felt that I just want to be away from my family and I am doing that. I feel the need to have a life away from them, thank God I live far away and I don't need to get out of my way to do it. I just am the one that normally goes there and I feel guilty, like a bad person for not going and helping my mother who often needs help with money. She got two dogs when she was with my dad and now doesn't have enougy to pay for them.
Also use pets to connect. They are like an addiction too
🎯
This is totally brilliant 👍👍👍 things are making so much sense after hearing you Tim. Thank you so much 🙏🏼
This man is priceless so much digging out dirt and deception I'm sleeping and being helped asleep and awake since listening to tim
Oh my goodness! The research that Tim spoke about really drilled into the importance of a good community for healing, AND also showed that like humans, animals have feelings and the need for connection! And if they have the same need as us for survival, then we should really also rethink about our food source!
connection is everything - i need to replace the disturbing connection with my mother and replace that with more healthy regulated people thanks
Yes you do. Currently doing that myself
@@ariadne6104me to .I m trying .considering I felt she was my only purpose in life its been extremely hard especially combined with the grief of several betrayals
Love these teachings so much. God bless u.❤
Thank you. I am saving mine in a file to download and listen while driving. ❤
I am grateful that i found such a teacher like you. Thank you
Thank you so much for your work, and that's all I can say right now.
Appreciate you. Thank you for the education
This is the problem. I can't find SAFE people in these 12 step rooms ...I was deeply hurt and retraumatized more from some of these ppl than others outside the program bc I expected them to be trusting and safe given the principles say we are to be loving and compassionate and protect anonymity..
Instead I was betrayed by a cppl of ppl. Now I'm really disillusioned as the opposite of addiction (to food anorexia ...) Is connection.
I haven't yet found a sponsor as I'm afraid to be judged...🙏😓
Same. That's because they are not safe people. I learned that the hard way.
Tim has a video on the 9 people you'll meet in recovery groups. It gave me a lot of clarity.
Its your expectations that were out of place, you were in a place where most everyone is sick (all mankind is) and trying to recover and everyone is at a different stage or place on that path.
Where in normal society people are generally in denial and/or ignorant and could care less about getting better because in their eyes there is nothing wrong needing to be fixed ... Nothing safe about that either.
At least in 12 step recovery you know people are sick, so you know what your dealing with.
I wish you well on your journey of recovery in 2024
If your parents suck, your life is terrible. Excellent.
Thank you Tim
Thank you ❤ Tim
Amazing content. Thanks Tim!
This guy is amazing.
The focus is on children, but everyone needs this, correct? Are needs for healthy attachment necessary throughout the human lifespan?
I have never used the "clip feature" on here before. I used it twice to make 2 different 15 second clips. I clipped 2 sentences from this video where u said becoming one doesn't need to include a marriage ceremony and entitled them "Marriage?".
Also, I have shared many of your videos to some groups on Facebook for people recovering from toxic relationships and narcissistic abuse. I hope they get watched because they are quite helpful.
If people truly want to be helped they will watch the videos and take something from them. All you can do is share them as you have and hope that the people who need them will find them 🙏
Thanks
This is amazing
I am finding much value in these lessons and I thank you for the time and anointing that produced these, however, I am a recovering closet addict and prefer not connecting with people; what advice do you have for those like me?
Powerful
How can I better be there for my kids when I am absolutely shattered? I don't feel like they are getting what they need from me...
cyrusfreeman, I’m so sorry you’re feel that way. I’m a mom myself and can understand your pain. When a mom is sick or going through some affliction it’s hard to cope and deal with children. Can you get help from a therapist, or family, perhaps a church? Don’t do this alone. I pray you get the courage and strength to get help. Blessings
@@carmenkamberos1156 the whole situation is terrible. I do have a therapist and I do have a church, but hardly anybody knows that this is happening… My wife is scared to death that people are going to find out what she did, and as long as I have any, hope that she’s going to come around,I don’t want to let everybody know what’s going on. I suppose at some point, I won’t be able to carry all this.
cyrusfreeman. I’m really moved by your situation. Thanks for replying. thought you’re the mom.Still I see, the complication and the secrecy is an enormous burden for you to carry alone. I suppose you and your wife are talking these things over and trying to support one another. Everybody makes mistakes and should be given a second chance. I cannot imagine what went wrong but try to talk it over with her and find a common ground. Other people don’t have to know except the therapist or your counselor at church. But get it out of your system, cry if you must, don’t be hard on yourself. There’s problems in every marriage and many are ashamed of what’s happening. Try to be strong for your kids and yourself. How to be strong is the question? Your therapist will help you with that, just don’t be afraid to be vulnerable, cry or scream and let it all out; do some journaling, writing down your thoughts and sorrows.
Try to eat well and sleep enough. I send you a hug and keep praying for you and family. May God be with you all. Blessings
Correction, Cyrus freeman, you’re the father, not the mom.
"The Bible never tells you to have a marriage ceremony it just tells you to 'become one' " and that is repeated in The Bible several times..."Leave your father and mother and become one".
Well this is a little weird that part 7 and part 8 of this series is not available to the public. ☹
What if the child connects with only one parent? Could that affect the child as well?
Socialization
16:56 A poorly attached child's demand for attention is not "excessive".
Tim, what do you think about the new psychedelic therapies on the horizon? For reliving childhood feelings and memories? Seems to be very promising.
Can a step mom repair the damage done by the biological mother when the daughter is a teen?
I do the abandonment issues and don't know how to trust and ended up I'm relationship with a women who had parents but doesn't know how to love or deal with someone who has so much trauma. And expects me to give get attention like she got with 2 parents to 1 child ratio. Total miscommunication and most understanding. She can't relate or know how to handle someone so traumatic.
Look up anxious and avoidant attachment
Wow, I'm 60 and not felt that.
40:20 here
37:00 where the longing came from
💕💕💕
I disagree with his theory on being able only to connect to one of two things 1. Activities 2. Drugs .... I connected with animals and I'm sure there are several other ways people have found to cope with lack of love in childhood that are more healthy then this guy gives us credit for. Lol After all, we are SURVIVORS. Some of us found different ways to do that....
TIM is helping folks discover the REASONS for their dysfunction, showing how and why negative coping skills developed. I think pets are a given in human connectivity. Connection with Nature in general …wild animals, birds, horses etc are vitally important, I agree that they come naturally. He’s so busy sharing the insights he has found that he’s not going to list cuddling bunny rabbits etc. He is doing his best with the topic at hand. He is a very generous, knowledgeable, wise person who is on a passionate mission to share all he knows to help people find inner peace and healing from a traumatic past that has crusty residue that has to be chipped away, dysfunctional habits peeled back to fall away and leave a lighter, happy, functional you! Animals teach us unconditional love and how to listen.
I totally understand that kind of connection with animals but it can only go so far. Trying to apply unconditional love towards another person is difficult but necessary.
I think context is important here. The guy seems to run a program that is specifically targeting people in addiction, as far as I have gathered, so it seems likely either he’s speaking to this audience specifically or due to working with them so long he’s developed that kind of bias
(Sorry to leave this on an older comment but it may be of interest to others too)
Still, the connection with an animal can be looked at as an activity. The real connection is with another human being . When an adult you bond with other humans for your partner. Pets or any other activity, or chemicals can ever fill that need .
@@carmenkamberos1156depends on the extent of connection. You could be addicted to your animals or you can have a normal bond and interaction.
What about the wedding in Jesus and the Apostles attended?
Jesus came for the lost and sick and poor and needy.
Hi
I avoid parents at all cost
Too bad I can’t find a community to form deep connections and friendships with…..
All Jesus talks about is his ‘ bride’ the church for the record…
How do I repair? Is there any hope?
I think our best hope is to form healthy connection as a grown up. Ugh, I’m trying, I’m trying.
Meee....adhd
You might be on the way for change, sometimes not much seems to be changing but something is changing. As small as it might be!
OMG this! I came for the complex trauma and attachment disorder splainer, but stayed for the deconstruction of fundamentalist patriarchal Christianity 😉
Warning: It's not clear that this guy's prerogative is Christian preaching via a cursory overview of attachment theory and an endless list of symptoms of 'failed attachment'. He was doing reasonably well until 31:46 when he contorts attachment theory into a bible class. What a disappointment.
Thankd for mentioning that. I don’t wanna listen to bible either. I should listen till the bible would be got in 😂 I don’t know why we should listen to any religion on psychology channel, though. The other video which talked about fear turned into bible lesson as well.
@@bingoandtotoYes! Unless he's speaking to Christians who are addicted to something (addicts)? I wonder if that's a possibility. In that case it would make sense if not, it's unnecessary. He does seem to be speaking specifically to addicts.
your channel causes the most hacking attempts on my iPhone....?