self confidence & dealing with insecurities
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- Опубліковано 11 вер 2024
- Sierra Schultzzie, Riayn Christina & Paloma Malfavon delve into their confidence journeys from twenty years old, how they’re learning to take up space & the struggles we all face with our inner saboteurs.
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Woo Girl Minute!
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About Twenty Whatever
Twenty Whatever features Sierra Schultzzie, Riayn Christina, & Paloma Malfavon talking candidly about navigating your 20's with your friends through different phases of life. (formerly Sierra Unfiltered)
self confidence & dealing with insecurities
• self confidence & deal...
0:56 intro
3:35 1 year ago!
8:09 The Precipice of Loving Who You Are
13:14 advice & criticism
16:36 but why?
19:30 body dysmorphia
24:44 maybe it’s me…
29:40 self sabotage & bad self talk
33:44 “I worked hard and I deserve this”
video referenced: • taking a burlesque cla...
37:04 and THAT’S why he’s an ex
40:14 adapting, growing, & committing to learn
43:02 early 20s to late 20s: confidence
46:43 confidence, I’m not there yet…
50:32 what gives you value?
56:00 send it with a woo girl minute!
for business inquires please contact:
sierra@sixsevenmedia.com
twentywhateverpod@gmail.com
Produced by Dear Media
STARTING MY WEDNESDAY OFF RIGHT 👏🏼
*editing after finishing the episode: oh my gosh I needed a good cry and yall came thru. Thank you for reminding me that I am worth it and I deserve it 🤍
You are and you do💕👏
@@TwentyWhatever😊😊😊😊😊
😭🥰
Woo girl moment, I'm handling everything at home better than I thought I would after my husband left for a six month military department. It helps that I have an amazing circle around me that I can lean on. Thank you for keeping me company this morning while I get ready for work ❤️ -Emilie
of course!! 🥺thank you for listening💕
so glad you're handling everything well at home, you're a champ, Emilie!!
I heard someone once say “You trying and working on loving yourself already means you love yourself” and that hit me HARDDDDDDD
So many good truth nuggets!! The “if I don’t listen to/take their advice, why would I listen to/take their criticism” I needed to hear!
As a musician I have been told by countless teachers to fake it till I make it. It really does work.
Also sort of a woo girl moment: I went to my senior prom and actually had a lot of fun. I never went to my junior prom or any other school dances really. I'm always afraid that I will be kind of awkward, but I was able to just enjoy it and was glad I got to go with my friends.
that's so great👏so glad you had fun with your friends!!
Connected with Jess’s statement about her mother. My mother is an amazing woman, but has always doubted herself especially in her looks. Everywhere we go I get you look just like your mother and I know that is a compliment from those people because I know my mother is beautiful. However, growing up that way it does mess with you…well if my mom doesn’t think she is beautiful and I look like her I must not be either. Conversations like this one though make you realize how you need to change outlooks on life and be confident, thank you all.
I wasn't expecting seeing Sierra this week, woo girl moment for our girl having her little girl ❤
WOOOOO!!! 👏👏👏
100% agreed💕
we get her for one more episode before her 20W maternity leave officially begins!
5 months?! I'll miss her! When is she back with y'all and are there going to be uploads still on main channel or just vlogs? @@TwentyWhatever
I’ve been battling in my head for weeeeeeks lately trying to understand confidence and realize how growing up I thought confidence=arrogance but I’m just now realizing at 28 that for me confidence now just means allowing myself to live. I’ve held myself back my entire life and now that I’m a mother I’m realizing how terrible that was for me. Trying to heal
Ok thoughts on the part about confidence VS arrogance/b*tchiness, if a man said it and he’d be called confident it’s not arrogance, if a man said it and he’d be called assertive it’s not b*tchy. Internalized misogyny can be seen a lot in the way we as women perceive confidence, especially in work in male dominated fields.
I totally feel being told what was wrong with me constantly growing up, the target of almost all mean things my friends ever did.. self-deprecation was a part of my personality for a long time. As an adult who knows better, I know I have to do my best not to talk shit about myself anymore, and to be the person who builds others up.
I have a very supportive mom I have been in a bigger body majority of my life and she has petite but she is always so critical of herself and I asked her when she comments about herself to talk like she is talking to me. She would never say to me that my thighs look big to me but she does to herself but i struggle with my own body image even because I heard her talk about herself growing up. It is all feelings and feelings are complicated. Love you girls.
In my late teens/early twenties, I thought that confidence meant knowing all the answers, learning all the skills, and having all the solutions every problem. I thought that once I had it all figured out, I would finally find true confidence. However, that only made me more insecure because OF COURSE I will never have ALL the answers. Now, in my mid-twenties, I am comfortable with the idea that I don't know everything about everything, but I'm confident that I'll be capable of working things out. It all comes with life experience ❤
"You is kind, you is smart, you is important and you deserve it" Thank you sm for that today. I'm feeling the imposter syndrome today but I start my new job today and it's a dream job but also I feel very under qualified for❤️ I worked hard and I fucking deserve this position and the life it will bring for me and my family. Happy Monday you beautiful people.
When Sierra went into back in the day when all she wanted to be was “fuckable” so freaking relatable. As the usual fat friend and people always over looking you, always thinking of if I could change my body, my make up, my personality that it would make me “fuckable” and it never worked. Now all I care about is that my husband finds me fuckable and that’s the best thing! But just that sent me into a whirlwind of understanding where a lot of the hatred for my body and finding overall confidence has stemmed from. Great episode ladies. I love that we check in and get this episode every year!!
Woo girl moment - I’ve really been struggling at my job to find my footing and help my boss see my point of view. I work at a small tech firm and sometimes I have ideas but he doesn’t know what to do with them. This weekend at a conference we sat down and spent a lot of time sharing and having a heart to heart about my vision and how I can be supported. This helped unlock my confidence in my creative energy and within one day I’ve already launched a new social media campaign and planned out how we’re going to integrate it at the next conference we visit!!!
that is so cool!! so excited for your upcoming campaign & that you were able to share your creativity with confidence at work! 🙌🎉
Woo girl moment! I am transferring to a new work location to better my mental health, increase my hours and increase my chances at career progression! Sorry I’m late to this one ladies (I literally stream immediately on Spotify every Thursday - I’m in Australia 🇦🇺- on my drive home from work) I’ve been in the feels listening to TTPD ❤️ Love you and look up to you all. Have written down that Sandra Bullock quote in my journal 🥰❤️ Thank you for sharing your insights! ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
When Jess becomes Yoda the oh wise one... The knowledge that pores out of this woman! Love this pod! I'm also working on this balance and self-love in Therapy. A work-book I highly recommend and am using with my therapist is
Self-Love Workbook for Women: Release Self-Doubt, Build Self-Compassion, and Embrace Who You Are Spiral-bound
by Megan Logan (Author)
HIGHLY Recommend! Love you, girls! And congrats, Sierra, on your little Alice!
1000% will be checking out this workbook! thank you so much for the rec💖
WISE BEYOND HER YEARS!!! my queen
My woo girl moment: I started a couch to 5k and have stuck with it for two weeks! As a Nuerodivergent who also has Cerebral Palsy, this is a big deal!
I know I have body dysmorphia. I’m 17 weeks pregnant, nothing fits anymore, everything is tight, people comment on my bump, however, I truly feel like my stomach looked this way before I was pregnant 😅 my husband will show me pictures of myself before and I’m just like “well I was sucking in in those photos”. Also, I still find myself sucking in! I have to remind myself that my clothes not fitting anymore are proof that I was not this big before. I wish I could appreciate my bump more bc I’m literally growing life! Definitely a learning process.
Wooow this episode just hits hard. The comments about a mum’s voice rings so true. Mine was my whole family calling me names, being negative & making me hate myself. Now, my whole family has kind of shifted massively when my dad died & my mum is my best friend. I’ve told her like hey dude your words fucked me up & made me hate myself. She feels so guilty, and even tells other family members to pipe down when they mention other people’s bodies/choices. We’ve gotten to a point of having an open conversation when we offend each other, and are always growing together. Even her world views have shifted & she’s become more open to changing her vernacular to align. I’m really proud of her & of us for continuing to grow as independents and besties. Also, my partner & I also call my negative self talk “Gail” bc Gail is being a real bitch to me, she’s being a hater. We don’t trust Gail’s opinion. Hehe thanks for being so amazing all of you! This podcast is everything 💛
I’m so excited to hear your perspectives on this, I think it’s something us twenty whatevers could really benefit from being more open and honest about!
i hope you enjoyed!! 🩵
The title omg, this is my mantra... Fake it till you make it!
I think it's about time to make a TwentyWhatever favorites playlist, starting with this one for sure
Woo girl moment - I bought and wore mid rise pants for the first time after many years of being insecure about my lower stomach and I felt very confident and cute with my belly button peeking out into the world
The way I screamed when you read my woo girl! Love you ladies!
this episode was so lovely, i really connected with and appreciated all the points you guys made. thanks ladies💕
🫶🏾
@@riaynchristina love you girl!!
"what you say has value" Sierra 😊
In the last couple years, I have learned that many of my peers, may they be slightly older than me or the same age as me, that throughout their lives they had to be perfect or strive to be perfect. This was a very strange concept to me because this was not how I was raised. I’ve spoken with many people who were raised like this, and realize how much they struggled, and I never could quite understand. But then, I heard their stories, and looked into my youth, and growing up. My mother passed away in 2016, so I’ve never been able to thank her for everything she did to my brothers and I in regards to this concept. In my parents eyes, we were as perfect as we were meant to be, They taught us that we were never to be perfect people, we were taught that we will make mistakes, and the biggest thing about making mistakes is learning from those mistakes. I think this helped in allowing me and my brothers to be confident in who we were, even with our imperfections or things that we saw as imperfections. Another thing I find so amazing, is my mother was born with severe cleft palette. She had facial scars her entire life, and had surgery up until around her 19th birthday. I have spoken with my friends and my family who knew my mother, and we talk about my mom, and to realize that many people never saw my mom‘s facial scars, was amazing, because they saw my mom for who she really was, and not what she always thought people saw her, which would be a person with severe facial scars.
Jess is so insightful and I find myself going back to things she says when I’m having hard days. ❤
I so thoroughly enjoyed this episode and have listened to it multiple times! My favorite parts are the introspective self-awareness commentary, it really balances out how we can be better while recognizing our worthiness.
Not me and Paloma going yess at exactly 5:29 because I whole heartedly agree ❤ your growth is breaking you out of your shell, and into the most beautiful woman I can’t wait to watch prosper!!
Wednesday are my favorite day ❤❤ thank you ladies!! Y’all are rockstars in my book!!! ❤❤❤❤
Thank you ladies so much! I am almost done with my third year of college (2 left) and have been feeling really burnt out and down on myself. And you really put things into perspective for me. ❤❤
Love these always❤❤❤ My favourite podcast !
🥰🥰
Finding a place of neutrality is so important! Understand that it will ebb and flow. ❤
amennnn
By far the best podcast yall have recorded
Okay so going off everything about beating people to the punch with negative self talk: I think to some point we want to say so someone else will… but we do this because when we say we know the intention behind the statement and exactly how deep we mean that statement… never would have thought this deep about this habit we all have 🩵🩵🩵 so much love for you girls and the important conversation and questions you pose
Such an amazing episode 💗
Sandra coming through with great lessons for us all!!!! I will remember that, thank you for sharing.
As usual, Jess coming through with great quotes!!! I have found this so helpful in healing the way I react to what people say about me.
Listening to Jess is low key my therapy
sameeee
@52:14 - I ask myself, “ what characteristics and attributes and I focused on improving? Physical? Employment/resume? Or obituary?
Oh man, the “why” what a power thing to ask someone.
Would love to see some guests!
any guests in particular? we'd love to know who you wanna see on the pod!💕💕
The other girls in the collective.
Or the boyfriends/ Steven
@@TwentyWhatever 🤍 Carrie 🤍
The saddest thing ever is my daughter is now 3 and I might have 5 photos of us together. I hate taking photos… and we’re an active family we do so many fun and cool things and I wish I was able to put myself in photos for her and for us
Wow, @27.30 is my son to a tee. I am crying
My mom hates her body. I firmly believe my body insecurities come from knowing that.
Woo girl moment 🎉 after losing my dog of 12 years, Misa, I am focusing on my happiness. I am diving into hobbies and got a pool for my backyard I haven't had a pool in over 20 years and I'm 30 😂😂 I got a tattoo for Misa and dyed and cut my hair (I went from crazy 5 colors to close to my natural color) got the pool to work out in since I have knee and sciatic problems we are buckling down! ❤
Honestly, my inner voice is my mother's words.
Is Jessica just googling “wise quotes” the entire podcast?
Because she ate.
Woo Girl Moment- i’ve
I‘ve never been so early 🎉
good morning! ☀🥳
@@TwentyWhatever it‘s already afternoon here 😜
tea 👀 a very happy EST afternoon to you then! 💖
@@TwentyWhatever or European late afternoon 😘
Hi, I would love to submit for a woo girl moment! My name is Ally and I’m technically not a 20 something anymore. I just turned 30 six weeks ago. I am finally moving out of my parents house and starting a new job in a new state next week! This is a huge accomplishment for me as someone with chronic health issues!
I'm sooooo sorry to break the news to y'all, but you're actually your hottest in your 30s, and dare I say 40s. Its okay though, y'all 20-somethings have something to look forward to 😅
omg amazing! love that i’ll be hot forever !!
I use to get called beautiful alot growing up I don't believe it
CURATING YOUR OWN SUFFERING?! Jessica! 😮😅
If life has inherent value, then your life is valuable. Full stop.
Was listening to this episode while getting ready for a job interview 🫶🏽 was definitely what I needed to hear thanks for always coming through
woo girl moment! i’m 18 and have officially decided to go to UC Davis in the fall!! i’m extra excited because my older sister is going to be a senior there and i can’t wait to live in the same town as her again! 😁😁
“Who you’re trying to convince, I know you’re lying, I’m you” -R