For those who are looking for an in-depth Biblical perspective on why divorce is okay for Christians, this article is the BEST I've seen! www.divorcehope.com/canchristiansremarryafterdivorce.htm Please always remember that a loving God wants your happiness. He's a God of mercy, tenderness, and forgiveness. He's not going to punish you for your past. There is hope, happiness, and love ahead!
Divorce was the best thing that ever happened to me! We have been apart now for four years and in those four years, I have realized how unhealthy our relationship was. I also realized how unhappy I was. Every day was miserable.
That’s why the Bible advice people to not get married TOO SOON, bc the choice of partner is enormously important since the relationship IS to last FOR LIFE, that’s how GOD sees it n IDGAD what humans say is okay if GOD says it’s NOT. Divorce is allowed if infidelity has happened but that’s the ONLY reason that GOD approves, if divorced on other terms then in GOD’S eyes You’re still married to the other person bc in his eyes that marriage is not over yet - until they die.
If nothing else I am much more compassionate and understanding of other divorcees. More often than not, they got out of abusive relationships and were healing and growing. Remember, divorces do not define us. They are a life experience that will pass.
what about mathew 5 32 and romans 7 2-3 . I'm single christian, never married. GOD hates divorce. Jesus said who ever marries a divorced person also commits adultery.
no he didnt. that is very sadly a horrific mistranslation. It says who ever marries a put away women (a women put away without a divorce certificate) is committing adultery. That was addressing an issue of the day where men would send women away without divorcing them. This would socially cripple the women.
@@michaeloates732 It has all the scriptures off the bible in it's original languages, to help translate it for yourself to English. This software is free. This totally makes the dispute of all the different bible translations completely irrelevant. You can figure it out for yourself, not only from comparing different translations from one another , but even use this free software from the original Hebrew, Aramaic, and Greek. This is so cool. :) I'm checking it out now. www.scripture4all.org/download/download_ISA3.php
Thanks for your response. However if you’re separated you are not single and I don’t think you should be leading other people on I don’t think you should be dating if you’re not single. Even if your divorce takes a long time I’m sorry about that. I know it’s a touchy subject for everybody.
Many people that I knew when my divorce happened told me that I was a different person after I was away from my ex-wife because of the way we weren't suited to each other. After the initial shock, I was much happier and relieved, and yes, I still have a long way to go before I meet Miss Right. As you say sometimes a divorce is the best option. You handled this hot topic with much sensitivity, more so than others I have met.
I was considering dating a woman that has 2 children. She isn't divorced. I would prefer she was divorced than a single mother. Anyway I don't think I'll pursue her any longer. He will always be lurking in the background. He will hate me, naturally. She made a bad choice and if she wants a new man she should find a man that also has children.
I'm a Christian man who used to be an alcoholic and drug addict. I seemed to have more luck dating women before I became a Christian. Christian women don't seem to like me very much.
Thanks coach. I finally dating again. Took long time. We are working on our relationship. I really hope it can be most beautiful one yet. Im praying for and hoping we can grow towards each other.
How do you justify this when the Bible stated that if you marry someone 's former spouse, you committ adultry? IT is something I often wonder about when I thought about dating a divorcee.
Short answer: It depends. If the person is getting divorced because of adultery that is clearly a biblical reason to get divorced. If a person has abandoned their meet some people say yes. In my opinion, I don’t think people should be permanently alone just because they had a contract with the state and believe it or not that’s what goes on a whole lot.
I don’t think emotional infidelity is grounds for divorce but I could be wrong. My wife was emotionally unfaithful to me but I don’t think it’s grounds for me to divorce and remarry unless I’m wrong. Please explain this.
I got a divorce in 2012 from my first wife, the mother of my two children. I remarried in 2013, but my second wife passed away in 2017. I've also struggled with depression and substance abuse issues for a large portion of my life. To say that things have been difficult is pretty obvious. I've always considered myself a Christian, but I know that I haven't acted the way I should *way too many times.* I've been trying to attend church more often, well, listening to our sermons online now with the quarantine, and most of my family is Christian, so there's support there (I just don't know how to get my 16 year old son interested in Christianity, aside from struggling to lead by example, and my 9 year old daughter is quickly losing interest in church, aside from just seeing her cousins there). I don't know, it just really sucks being single, and I know that I have to deal with my drinking to be able to find a healthy relationship, not to mention with God too, but it's a vicious cycle (I've been using for almost 20 years, from alcohol, pills, crack, to full blown IV heroin addiction, I know drinking and smoking weed isn't what I should be doing, and I'm working on that one right now), I get depressed from being alone, which makes drinking and getting high a lot more tempting, and definitely makes lust more tempting (porn), etc. I know I need help, and I'm trying to make a conscious effort to pray more now. I know there are others out there that have probably been in similar situations and are living a good Christian life (and also aren't miserable without some kind of drugs, I've met plenty of people in both the church and programs like AA/NA that really seemed genuinely happy with sobriety, most of them crediting God). Any advice or prayers would be appreciated. God bless everyone out there, stay safe!
I'm sorry to hear everything you've been through! It sounds to me though that you have a lot of inner strength. You see how you can improve and are working to do just that. Give yourself credit for those wins! You can totally do this my friend and you are never alone! Jesus is always there for you. As you trust Him (like you are) and pray for help things will get better. I'm sending prayers your way! God bless!
Sadhguru help you to spiritual and self love is what give you the courage and strength to work on things that has values and to become a better human being. Marissa peer and Esther perel.
You need to get strong first, and develop self-control, before you will be ready to have another relationship. You need to be able to share your strength with your partner, not only be drawing upon theirs. Also, your children will be perceptive to see the fruits of the Spirit in your life and that will be the most powerful witness of Christ’s love and grace that you can give them... I say this, not as someone with all the answers, but as a man who has been through divorce because of my ex-wife’s unfaithfulness. I have come to realise that by dealing with yourself, you will become more attractive and a better catch. God bless
Children see our actions not how we talk, can't talk our ways out of it... when Children sit on the fence it's cause they are watching their peers and parents and if the actions don't align with what being told ,conflict of interest can arise children second guess themselves. Wow I can't trust nothing. I guess that's why higher authorities in church start to lose their shine, so children drop out of church. I know I did at some stage. I'm older now and living from my own responsibilities, and I'm so hungry for the word now.
This is a very difficult topic and you handled it with such grace! When I went through my divorce I found a faith based support group and I was really humbled by the entire experience. I’ve become more aware of my social surroundings and I realized that I was overly patient and hopeful that things would get better.
I was married for 5 years and been divorced for 6 years now. I feel sad because I can't find anyone. Most people I know who went through divorce got back into dating and found someone. No one wants to give me the benefit of the doubt. I've been on two dates after constant online dating and asking women out. It's one and done. I hate everything that has happened to me.
You must ask yourself "will I be able to handle the divorce person's ups and downs"? You also have to ask yourself "am I the divorcees boyfriend or girlfriend or just a support person"? And if young kids are involved do I want the drama?
Hi Melannie. I am autistic. I was diagnosed 2 years ago at 48. I really struggled to date, have relationship. I got a little better, had a date or relationship every about 5 months to 5 years. And when got in relationships, I was often dumped, cheated on. I got tired of that. So I tried a date coach program by a Christian called It's Not You It's Your Technique. After that I started dating, getting into relationships more. 5 years ago I got married. I have a 3 year old Autistic daughter. I am going thru a 1 year long combined separation, divorce, that almost completed. My issues have been that I get defensive, don't handle her depression, anger, bad stimuli well. Example I forgot to push chair in that usually push in. Daughter climbed chair, got hurt(not permanent). She got angry, yelled, screamed at me. I defensively said that I push chair in most of time, and that didn't know she was coming over with daughter and sorry bout what happened. She just angrier, yelled at me more(This happened during separation) The other issue was that she wouldn't let me help do things like dishes, etc, but then said I never helped her, causing her to get overwhelmed, despite me changing LOTS of diapers, etc. Her issues was her depression, anger, yelling, screaming at me, getting easily provoked by me(What I unintentionally said, did, my autistic behaviorisms, etc, would provoke her.) She also mismanages money, goes --$333+ in the hole every other month, because I when I successfully managed the budget, wouldn't buy a $300 phone, etc, and got tired of arguing, fighting, so I let her manage money instead. She also doesn't remember the good times, and the good, nice things I do, have done, and only remembers bad stuff. She doesn't thank me, but instead unconstructively, only negatively points out what bad. We fought a lot over money, other issues. Had counseling, etc. She is the one who wanted, started the separation, divorce, left me. We with our counselor, had a plan, and I was working the plan, and was trying hard to work things out, but that, it wasn't enough, and so she left me. My concerns now are, is that after divorce completed, I am a 5-8, 51 year old divorced autistic, ADHD, man that had, survived a stroke 8 months ago. I feel like a broken man. I wonder if a woman will ever want a man like me. I am trying to be the best possible me, getting counseling, etc, but I still wonder. I am worried that women will hold my divorce against me. And I am worried about my internal picker, my ability to choose a good woman, recognize red flags, etc. I also wonder if a divorced woman will have issues. And I am worried that I have issues, baggage that when, if combined with other possible issues, that would just doom a date, relationship, marriage, etc. So I am scared that I'll be alone the rest of my life, and scared to date, enter a relationship, get married, etc. And I know that most eligible women age about 40 to 54 are divorced. I used to wonder why divorced women would take years to even go on a casual first date again. But now that I am divorced, I understand. I really need your, or someone else's help Melannie, for when, if I do try to date after my divorce is completed. But usually it cost a lot of money. The It's not you it's your technique program, is, was about $99. I realize that's not a lot of money to some. But it is to me. But it was a fair price, was worth every penny. I didn't think I would ever need such a program again, if I could afford it. If you can't help me Melannie, can you steer me to somebody that can, that I would be able to afford. Sorry for the length. And thanks for your time, reading this, if you read, reply to this, and for your videos.
One thing that I felt disturbing in my divorce after 17 years was, the fact that my now ex-wife was a Christian. We came to church together every time the door was open we prayed together frequently towards the end of our relationship somethings going on with her spiritually. I think people need to keep this in mind though it’s very important just because a person is a Christian a believer just because they’re saved which means that their sins are forgiven doesn’t make them as a person. I happen to think it’s disgusting though if they’re a person male or female would break the Merrill covenant that way. What’s even worse Is the snotty way that people in church get involved. Not everybody goes to church is a Christian and some of them there are Christians it doesn’t mean they’re good just forgiven.
For Christian's, divorce is a handicap. Most churches bylaws are extremely strict on divorce especially for men. If a man marries a divorcee he loses opportunity to serve the church. He cannot be considered for deacon or other privileges. Is that something to consider when you find yourself falling for a divorced woman?
I can't answer for your religion. That is a very personal thing that each man needs to decide for himself. My mom is divorced and I can honestly tell you that she'll make the best wife a man will ever have. It's really a personal decision though. God bless!
Thank you for this video. I'm divorced and have been for several years. I've dated two women since my divorce and both of them were also divorced. Your video on this subject was really great and enlightening. Again thank you for this video.
Jason Branning if you divorced from your unfaithful wife is allowence. But if you dated divorced women, warning! Jesus Lord says : Whoever marries a woman who is divorced, he commits adultery (Matt 5 : 32b, Luke 16 : 18b) And remember Lord command in 1 Cor 7 : 11 : If a wife does depart/divorced from husband Let her remain unmarried or reconciled to her husband. If you want ro remarry, you hv to marry a woman who never been married or virgin. Marry virgin is covenant of marriage Marry divorcee is adultey (sexual sin)
I’ve been in love for a few years now with a woman that is separated n almost divorced her partner. The marriage is really dead n they’re not ever gonna get back together, in fact I actually told her to ‘patch’ her marriage if possible n she actually tried to but came to realize that it was for no use. I love her but I also love God n I’ve been honest with her that I will NEVER consider marrying her if the divorce isn’t approved by God’s laws in the Bible, n she actually took that to heart which made me really happy bc that means that she’s definitely christian wife material. There’s really not anything to debate in terms of divorce bc the Bible is really clear on that point: “God HATES divorce”, it states that a divorce is allowed tho but SOLELY if there’s been INFIDELITY, then the innocent partner has right to divorce if they feel that they can’t be together with that person anymore, otherwise ONLY thing that actually can terminate a marriage is if you get WIDOWED - “till DEATH parts us” as they say.
That sounds like what happened to me. I wanted to stay true to the wedding vows be she had a much different idea of what marriage was about there was almost no give and much more take. At first it was good but after years of take and no give I dreaded going home. I loved her but she didn't want to improve her life but stay in a very one sided existence 12:12
I have been divorced for ten years now. and have not dated, a few coffee meets, but not really a date.I felt that after my divorce all I wanted was to find myself again, and who I was. My 2 daughters came first since I had them through their teen years. Boy that was fun.Some serious hardships with one of them. I felt it wouldn't be fair to someone other than me to deal with that. As a Christian, I had taken things hard and thought I was tainted in His eyes. Grace has shown me the opposite. the last year I have tried dating sites but have no connection to anyone. God first for me. I have come to the point in life where I will let God move and not me. I takes time and eyes on God to heal.
I'm divorced twice in both cases they broke commandments and the the vows. I will not tolerate such behavior. They broke my trust and faith in women. How dose one come back frome that. I'm not meant to be alone.
"Divorce is something you've been through, not who you are" so wise, so true! Divorce was one of the best things in my life, it was like being born again, again! I realised who my real friends were... no one. All my "Christian" friends stopped talking with me and sided with my Ex wife. She was emotionally and physically abusive. Took photos of nail marks in my body to prove it, as I instinctively feared no one would ever believe me. They came in handy during the divorce proceedings, lol, (which I won ). The Bible NEVER condemns divorce, only "putting away". These are two different things. Divorce is a blessing, a life saver. Divorce is not a sin, just the result of sin. Only God truly knows how timely this video was. Thanks Melannie :)
@@CoachMelannie Thank you for all your videos Melannie. I think you are an interesting speaker, and a funny lecturer. I notice you are not wearing your leather jackets, in this video. I hope your Mum would like me, as a would be boyfriend for you, or that I would be your Mum's type, as I am 55 years of age. Thank you.
wow. Totallyanti what marriage is. What being Christian is. Why does he church celebrate divorce? No wonder the divorce rate is s high. No one has any morals
Yes. The way the laws are turned against men marriage is no longer a viable option. Or dating for that matter. Singleness is the only safe way for men now. This society has abandoned Godly morals and the courts are not good to men in divorce.
@@Montyandrew45 Jesus says : Whoever marries her who is divorced he commits adultery (Matthew 5 : 32b, Luke 16 : 18b Lord commands : if a wife divorced let her remain unmarried or be reconciled to her husband. a wife is bound to her husband as long as he lives (not only as long as their marriage) but if her husband dies (not if her husband divorced her) she is free to remarry (1 Corinthians 7 : 11, 39 ) To marry divorced woman you will be one flash to another man's wife and it's called adulterous (sexual sin ) If you not repent and leave her, you both go to hell after dies
@@nitodjiloy7186 while I will never bad mouth anyone's religion as you are free to believe and worship who and what you want, things like this make me not want to go near it at all
Yeah that not good to look down on the person who going through a divorce but you have to find out why the person got a divorce if you get in a relationship with that person!
Is there a contradiction in the legal sense between the interpretation of marriage within the Bible versus the United State’s various laws upon marriage? As we leave the confusing Age of Pisces, and approach the humanitarian Aquarian Age, marriage has undergone significant changes in contrasting laws. I do not wish to detract from the message of this endeavor, but many Christians are unaware of the positive correlation of celestial influence as noted in scripture: Matthew 2:1 Wycliffe Bible (WYC) 1 Therefore when Jesus was born in Bethlehem of Juda, in the days of king Herod, lo! astrologers [lo! kings, or wise men,] came from the east to Jerusalem, Matthew 2:7-9 Living Bible (TLB) 7 Then Herod sent a private message to the astrologers, asking them to come to see him; at this meeting he found out from them the exact time when they first saw the star. Then he told them, 8 “Go to Bethlehem and search for the child. And when you find him, come back and tell me so that I can go and worship him too!” 9 After this interview the astrologers started out again. And look! The star appeared to them again, standing over Bethlehem. As I’m Not trying to side track the emphasis of this research, but I must ask my fellow Christians, if the Magi, or wise men being astrologers, if they were of Satan why did they not turn in the child’s where abouts to the evil King Herod after they received a dream from God? At no time in history has there been so much upheaval regarding marriage and conflict about what is correct, concerning matrimony regarding law and religious integrity. This paper will show some of the devolutionary changes within the United States, and point out Biblical contrasting viewpoints. This nation claims within it’s documents and nationally recognized songs to have some divine connection to God: “We the People…” have repeated such phrases as, “One nation under God”, “God shed his grace on thee,” In God We Trust”, “God Bless America.” Has the U.S. allowed man made morality to rule in much the same fashion as the San Hedren at the time of Christ in Israel? It is evident that the Council of Nicaea in 325 A.D. in Asia Minor, Roman Imporer Constantine, and many language interpreters have edited and omitted important books regarding the Bible. The Bible, as inspired by the Lord and written by men, has undergone mistranslation. However, it must be understood, regardless of the editing or mistranslations; if our omnipotent all powerful God could not make his point with a crooked stick would he truly be God? This nation has a large collection of laws regarding marriage and/or sexuality that contradicts Biblical references. The U.S. laws allow a Jew or a Christian whom have been divorced to remarry another of the same faith, and endorses multiple marriages. Most states allow divorces of those within the Jewish or Christian community on grounds other than adultery, and now homosexual marriages are being paraded through the limelight. Pharisee could mean: a member of an ancient Jewish sect, distinguished by strict observance of the traditional and written law, and commonly held to have pretensions to superior sanctity. The leadership within the Republican Party are they Pharisees if they disregard the words of the prophets Nathan and Isaiah upon marriage? Also we must note are there Democrat leader Pharisees and hypocrisy as they endorse homosexual marriage and support the empowered woman of feminist matriarchal rule, is that a Biblically sound teaching? We can use the Biblical term Pharisee to be defined in modern terms as professions related to our present day attorneys, regretfully some clergy, and many positions within politically derived governmental offices. My own respected pastor says Rush Limbaugh is the epitome of a Pharisee. Do our nation’s laws sanctify hypocrisy if we truly mean, “One Nation Under God”, if we aren’t following the teachings within the Bible? There are a large collection of scriptures regarding marriage in the Torah and New Testament, but a few inspired by Christ have the heaviest foundation. The Pharisees were testing Christ’s knowledge and interpretation of law, both content and principle, when the following scenario took place: Matthew 19:3-9 Authorized (King James) Version (AKJV) 3 The Pharisees also came unto him, tempting him, and saying unto him, Is it lawful for a man to put away his wife for every cause? 4 And he answered and said unto them, Have ye not read, that he which made them at the beginning made them male and female, 5 and said, For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh? 6 Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder. 7 They say unto him, Why did Moses then command to give a writing of divorcement, and to put her away? 8 He saith unto them, Moses because of the hardness of your hearts suffered you to put away your wives: but from the beginning it was not so. 9 And I say unto you, Whosoever shall put away his wife, except it be for fornication, and shall marry another, committeth adultery: and whoso marrieth her which is put away doth commit adultery. Exhibit B, the following verse is translated from one of the scriptures that Jesus was referencing that Moses (an astrologer whom evidently learned the science from the Egyptians as he was a prince and raised as Royalty) wrote in Hebrew: Deuteronomy 24:1 Complete Jewish Bible (CJB) 1 “Suppose a man marries a woman and consummates the marriage but later finds her displeasing, because he has found her offensive in some respect. He writes her a divorce document, gives it to her and sends her away from his house. Exhibit C, Moses wrote concerning the sanctity of marriage for the Levite Priests: Leviticus 21:13-14 Expanded Bible (EXB) 13 “‘The high priest must marry a woman who is a virgin. 14 He must not marry a widow, a divorced woman, or ·a defiled prostitute [or a defiled woman or a prostitute; v. 7]. He must marry a virgin from his own people 15 so ·the people will respect his children as his own [he will not defile his children]. I am the LORD. I have ·set the high priest apart for his special job [sanctified/consecrated him].’” Exhibit D, Christ further singles out the men of Israel, and the future foundation of his church when he comes down on the Jewish leaders and the mono-theistic community in the following scriptures:
Melannie, I can relate to what you said about divorced people. Frankly, I've been there and had to live with it. Divorce is not something I'm proud of. I've unfortunately been through it 3 times, and because of them my self confidence is shot. I have difficulty finding the courage to even talk with women regarding the possibility of having a relationship, because of having been burned so many times. I've had friends that were women, and at one time they outnumbered my male friends. I could talk with them as friends, but most were either married or in relationships and I would never even broach the idea of a relationship with any of them. I'm the kind of guy that respects the relationships of my friends. Right now, I lived in a new place, and I've only made a select few friends in the area. Before moving here, I lived in an area where I had resided for close to 40 years and had a lot of friends that came and went. I still have friends there, but not as many as I used to have. That was also the area of the country where 2 of my marriages and divorces took place. My only child, a son from all of my marriages, was born in that area. He is now an adult and is in the process of going through a relationship with a young lady himself. All this leaves me in a pretty lonely position, a place where I've been before.
I'm so sorry. It sounds like you've been through some tough things. Please let me know if you'd like my help in some way! melannie@coachmelannie.com God bless 🙏
@@meatpuppet428 That's a very archaic thing to say. Of my 3 divorces, only the first one was filed by myself. My ex-wife was an alcoholic and in a country that was difficult to get her out of. I also want to add that I still carry real physical scars from our relationship. She would get drunk, and fight with me, frequently using her teeth and long finger nails. At one time I thought she might pull a knife on me. The US government prevented her from coming into the country, so in essence I would have been kept from her company. The other two filed against me. The first of those two had psychological and serious emotional problems,. At one time she even pulled a loaded fire arm on me and threaten me. The last one was essentially goaded by her own daughter to file. So there are situations that you can't use your logic on, as they just don't fit. Oh, I might add, yesterday I was notified by my son that his mother, my second wife passed away the night before. So she no longer plays any part in my life except for my only son. To be honest, I never stopped caring for any one of them, including her. I didn't ask for the divorces! They were thrust on me. When I was in the country of my first wife, I saw a marriage that was unhappy, and the couple were permanently separated. They would have divorced if the law of the country would have allowed it, but it didn't. It was my former in-laws.
@@meatpuppet428 I'm sorry to say this, but you need to bring your thinking up to the 21st century. Thinking like you are talking about went out with the Dark Ages. Women have rights now and aren't thought of as chattel property of the men any more. Back then men had to control women by making them conform to so called religious norms and obey men. That is no longer the case, and I resent that you put this lady down by making your statements that her videos go against God. Your attitude is so close minded, and painfully out of date. I will also add that I can see, that with your attitude about women, it's no wonder why you've gone over half your life without a relationship and a quarter of it without even a date. This is the last thing I will say to you about the matter.
you are spot on; I went through a divorce in 2012. we had a daughter together we both was on good terms. my ex married this guy who was raising his two sons. we all get along great he is a great. I really think it was a blessing for us to get a divorce. now I'm looking for my other half.
@@meatpuppet428 I don't think you need to judge someone unless you know the whole story of the divorce! you ever thought maybe God had me married this woman for a reason and maybe God had this woman to divorce me for a reason. i will say this though i know God a lot better than I did when I was married. It was a blessing.
I feel very much the same way in a lot of situations in this all has to do with love and that has the makings of a wonderful story. Keep up the good work Melanie. It's hard for me to come up with words at this point in time because I waited so long hopefully the words will start falling into place as everything else seems to be. You have such a nice voice I'd love to talk to you.
Yeah my husband left me for drugs 4 years ago and just recently got divorced. Abandonment and cheating are perfect biblical reasons to divorce but unfortunately even though I have been alone most through the marriage and when he was gone,. Christian men avoid me like a plague and its heartbreaking to me. i just recently want to date but i think i forgot how.
I finally met a woman and we really like eachother. She is going through finalizing her divorce. My question is, once she is divorced and if I Marry her will we be living in Adultery?
It is my personal belief that God does not want us to stay in unhappy/unhealthy relationships. Divorce is not ideal but God certainly doesn't want us to live our lives alone. I am not a preacher however I believe in a kind God who focuses on the future instead of the past. I do not believe it is a sin to move on and progress. I hope that helps!
@@thomasusheriii971 There are different positions about this... My understanding is: “sexual immorality” (i.e. adultery) is the biblical reason for getting a divorce. So, assuming her partner committed adultery, then she is free to remarry. If her partner is an unbeliever but didn’t commit adultery, then she can divorce him but not remarry, because reconciliation is still possible (e.g. if he were to become a Christian). Some Christians (e.g. John Piper) have argued it is not right for Christians to remarry even after adultery. I don’t personally agree with this view of Scripture, but you’ll need to look into the arguments and decide for yourself. It is worth pointing out that marriage is an earthly institution, and symbolic, not binding in heaven (e.g. Matthew 22:30) and its binding nature is more based upon giving a vow (let your “yes” be yes) than upon a spiritual state of unity (despite the reference to two becoming one flesh - a metaphor).
@@AndyJMacLeod I'm sorry, but this is a little light in the details of the scripture. Mat 5 31-32 Mark 10 2-9 Luke 16:18 1st Cor 7:39 Are quite clear, there is a standard by God's Law, not what we want it to be to suit our own personal feelings. God does want us to move forward but in righteousness. I like Coach Melanie as I recently found her, alot of good tips but if I'm honest, you have to be careful and not be haste on her response, take more time in scripture, Melanie openly said she is not a preacher. You go to a cardiologist to see about your heart not a nurse. Melanie seems good to acquire, maintain a healthy relationship but I would not rely my obedience to it. Please, I mean no disrespect to anybody but all the videos I have seen up to this point, I haven't came across the one where she mentions pray together, read scripture together, maybe hang out with accountability tk prevent those sexual temptations, let's be real. It's hard being alone for some. Again, no disrespect, I like Melanie up to this point but I had to say something. You need to assess the scenari before hooking up with another person. Scriptures clearly state, it's not a metaphor. Marriage is vow that bonds not only in the physical but the spiritual, that is why It hurts so much when it fails. Plus it also shows your commitment to God, if you can break this what does that say about you. I struggle with this myself at times.
I think the lady I've been texting isn't ready to date yet 3 years after her divorce and I'm still going through mine 8 months being alone and she says I'm not ready either. But I'm attracted to her unfortunately for me and I would like someone to be a companion.
I'm so sorry to hear that. These videos might help you with this if you decide to move on from her. ua-cam.com/play/PLsQq0KK7pJ-VSJTPh27Xb7RNm14DvYN8X.html Let me know if I can help!
@@meatpuppet428 If a wife cheated by her husband and divorces, she has to remain unmarried. She is free to remarry if her former husband dies. Jesus forbides you (man) marry a woman who is divorced bcz its adultery.
Interesting after only one minute how she mention people want to stay away from it because it might be catching the women in the church is don’t ever want their husband hanging around with a man that’s going through or been through a divorce quite frankly ask because the snotty ...... want total control of their husbands. Also, women don’t want their husbands being around a man that successfully navigates a bad divorce. I went through a terrible divorce and by the grace of God the custody battle was one and the prom with women and they can be quite evil if they think they’re entitled to the children, all the money, and every other thing. They feel like their men should burn in hell for eternity even if it wasn’t his idea. Don’t misunderstand, the fellows do wrong things too. My best advice as a believer in Jesus for the last 46 years is to prayerfully approach her problems try to make your marriage work but just because you’re Christian does not mean you have got to be tied down because your mate decided to betray you! I’ll tell you again right now just because a person is saying doesn’t mean they’re nice.
Hi Melannie, I recently joined eharmony. I'm seeing women on their who's marital status is separated! That's right, their not even divorced and their looking to date already. What's up with these woman?
OK I'm gonna chime in here @coachmelanie give them some grace. I'm currently separated and in dating sites. Divorce can take a long long time. Your reaction is honestly judgemental. Think about these people myself included our marriages are over we are simply waiting for the paper that says so. I have a friend that was separated for seven years due to no fault of her own. Should she not be aloud to date because of this even tho her marriage was completely over. Dating for a believer should not be sexual, but surely it is OK to be in a caring relationship or at least exploring the options. Imagine if you were in their shoes. Be kind.
@@michaeloates732 I have a laugh for you. I once went on Eharmony looking for someone to have a relationship with and one of my last matches with was my ex-wife. My only comment was "oh heck no" and I frankly quit that service. The profile picture she put on the application looked like she was mad at the world when it was taken.😒
I have been through more than one divorce unfortunately. It seems I always picked the wrong type of woman. I'm 58 year's old this year. Scared of dating again. But don't want to live by myself forever. I like your view point on these matter's. Thank you for helping us guy's coach Melanie.
@@meatpuppet428 I have read the King James Bible Several time's. I don't remember seeing anything like what your stating. Plus it's a no no to remarry someone you divorce. I don't know where your getting that information from. Just saying.
I am single, just met someone who is a divorcee man. He connected but disclosed me about divorce after 1.5 Months. Actually I am having betrayed feeling. but it's but difficult for me to come out of that great connection I had developed. Could you please guide whether I should go further with this relationship or not?
I'm sorry to hear that happened! I totally see why you feel the way you do. I can't tell you what to do of course but if you feel that he purposefully kept the truth from you it could be a big red flag that you can't trust him. There's always the possibility that he was nervous to tell you as well. I'm working on creating a new UA-cam channel for Coaching women. Be sure to follow me here and I'll share when it's up and running! God bless!
Well I'm Engaged to be married on April 4 and he used to talk about his ex-wife all the time he still does some time to time so feels like he's comparing me to her
That’s a difficult passage. Seems like God expects people to remain married even though the other spouse beats you, lies to you, ignores or mocks you. Why would people live under such a yoke??
@@AaronBr00mfie7d Most people I know would say that it's ok to separate and get to safety, except for the most extreme view which states you must submit to the husband even if he's physically and emotionally abusing you. I agree that stance is just terrible!
How bout single father's who have kids under 18. What would you suggest for them to build a new, positive relationship with someone. What you tell women who are hesitant about dating single father's due to negative stigma, social-econamic conserns that have been said. Saying most single father's are wrong to date or they're so much Drama and BS. They're of lower status etc so date up etc perhaps you can do a video bout it ? The pros of dating single father's...or something???
That's a great idea for a video! I'm so sorry for the unkind things some people say. I personally believe that single parents can become the very best partners. This goes for both men and women. Feel free to email me if I can help coachmelannie.com/contact-me/
@@CoachMelannie most of the time I see single moms are the ones who seems to have a ( get a new relationship 1st) as u said in a video they're moving up to a better economic-social status. While the single dad oftentimes remains @ a lower status. Although women give him respect for being involved in his kids lives. They don't want to date him because of either drama, jealousy or they feel his resources: money time & attention are focused on his kids and not her needs, goals and wants in her life So she either friend zone s,keeping @ great distance or ghosts him for someone who can give her the things she wants in live for herself. She maybe doing the situation to all the men in her life. In psychology (human behavior)I think the term is called " hypergamy". This can be very tough on men especially emotionally and mentally and can be very draining to be constantly rejected because he's trying to do the right thing and be a father to his kids the best way he knows how with very little support or anything which most of the time women get more support understanding etc then the father's. They're expected to provide for 2 households. Give to the mom "without question or accountability. Everytime that's with or without a new boyfriend/ husband in the picture who may make more than the dad so everyone looks down at the dad for now doing what the bf does. Sometimes the mom will try to alienate the kids or brainwashing them against the dad so she can have a better life with the new bf that she's put in the father's role because he's giving her what she wants in her life. There's great Step father's who do an awesome job giving support not saying anything bad bout that at all This has been my experience as a single father's. I'm not the only one. I'm sure other single father's have it worse than this. I'm always told be patient the right one is out there. I know God's got it covered. Because I'm his kid. It does get tiring having to do everything by urself. Have had to go to therapy to be able to understand all of this with the clarity I've said in this message. Not everyone has that opportunity or can see the red flags I've seen thru this process. Still learning to go thru it like when Jesus was with the discipline s as they went through the storm. They got to the other side with Jesus being there love ue channel it's a blessing from God
Hi Melannie , I have been devorced 3 times all 3 where for infidelity on their part . I will take some of the blame I worked a jod that was very demanding my last devorce was in 2002 I have been in a few relationships since them and had stopped dating and I am ready to get back in to dating and I have moved back to my home town which has changed a whole lot most of the places to meet women are at bars and I am a Christian man I go to a big church and I am not finding any single women there . I would really like to find a Christian woman to marry and I have lost my ability to to be a little snarky and banter with women in conversations I need some help.in this area thank you.
I'm sorry that has happened to you! One thing to consider is to make sure you know the signs of a toxic woman. Knowing these signs will help you avoid women like that in the future and attract a happy relationship instead. Here are some videos on that ua-cam.com/play/PLsQq0KK7pJ-VyeTDmwCE46a85Pme0uqRA.html In addition to these videos I have an online course that teaches how to stay aware from bad relationships and attract healthy/happy relationships. Here's a link so you can check it out coachmelannie.com/bad-relationships-be-free-forever/ I also have an online course that will teach you how to find and attract the type of woman you are looking for. Here is a link coachmelannie.com/how-to-get-a-girlfriend/ You've got this my friend!
Thank you sir for actually paying close attention to the rules in the Bible!!! I’m appalled by the large amount of ‘christians’ who still think it’s allowed to divorce for whatever reason, n not just infidelity, they don’t realize that THAT’s actually the fact why the Bible says that your choice of partner is so important bc that relationship n marriage is meant to be LITERALLY FOR LIFE n only a cheating partner is a approved reason for divorcing them.
I’ve actually myself advised a woman I’ve been in love with for a few years to NOT divorce her husband, that’s right, I’m in love with her n I’d definitely want her to be my wife but fully aware of that she’ll not be available for an other only God knows how long time I’ve told her to stay with her husband...simply bc I can’t ask God to bless our relationship if she’s been freed in the wrong way. No relationship will last if God is not part of it. I don’t want to ‘win’ her faster bc of a unscriptural divorce n then God cannot bless our relationship, I want a lasting relationships with her if she’ll be my wife n God is a natural part of it for me. I’d rather have to wait for her 10 or 15 years extra then enjoying ‘the temporary pleasure of sin’ n loose God’s approval.
NO ABSOLUTELY NOT. That is unless you DON'T mind spending years basically piecing the human version of a used car back together again and dealing with all the damage that has been done by the previous owner and this isn't just a assumption I lived it and swore I'd never do it again. NOW the only way I'll ever consider dating a woman is "no divorces and no children". It's just not worth it when you can just find someone newer and with less mileage.
Jesus Christ says. "What God has joined together, do not separate." You just clarified that you jump from guy to guy. How can you say you're a follower of Jesus Christ and give advice. Best advice, stop standing between Jesus Christ and those who seek The Truth and The Life.
I'm not here to debate with you. If you really are the Godly, person you claim to be you won't come to my channel and bad talk, me, my beliefs and opinions on my own videos. Thank you. Have a nice day.
@@CoachMelannie I admire your kindness and spirit of grace. You said some very good things in this video. Here’s the problem though...Christ was very clear in Matthew 19 and Matthew 5 when He stated that only in a case of sexual unfaithfulness can a person divorce his or her spouse. This is a very touchy topic indeed, but as Christians, we need to take heed what Christ told us in scripture.
There are so many ‘christians’ today that doesn’t consider the rule for scriptural divorce worth following, simply bc it means that you actually have to be held responsible for whatever choice you make. God said a marriage is FOR LIFE n he only approves divorce if there’s been infidelity n the innocent person feel that they cannot live together with that person anymore. The Bible is clear that “God HATES divorce” n that’s bc divorcing was never even INTENDED to be n that’s why the choice of partner was so darn important bc they were to be your partner FOR LIFE n not just till it wasn’t fun anymore. Unhappiness is not a reason for divorce!, the Bible has many useful principles that if applied properly will create a good lasting relationship n marriage. The Bible puts enormous pressure on the husband on how to treat his wife in a way that God actually DEMANDS him to do, it actually says that if he DOESN’T treat her that way he’s prayers may be blocked n he won’t be blessed by God n that’s a recipe for catastrophe.
@@waudicas Infidelity does not mean only just never cheating, never having a sexual affair. There are many ways that a person can be guilty of infidelity. That ranges from abuse, being manipulative, controlling, not fulfilling your responsibilities, etc. Example, if a wife or husband is doing cocaine, and or gambling away all money irresponsibly so that there not enough to pay bills, rent, to the point of homelessness, etc, then that is, can be a example of infidelity. Even irreconcilable differences, arguments, can be infidelity. If a spouse is constantly unfairly yelling, screaming at you, that can be infidelity. And there's stuff like that, that might be infidelity that might be difficult to perceive as infidelity. Because of that, if there are LEGIT irreconcilable LEGIT differences, that helped lead to a divorce, that divorce could be ok or not in God's eyes, and only God would know that or not. But even if a married couple makes a mistake 0:05 and mistakenly divorces because they think that their partner is unfairly yelling, screaming at them all the time, and they don't think they can take that anymore, then Jesus understands that we are not perfect, that we make mistakes, and gives the chance to Repent, change, learn, etc, so that if such a divorce happens, God can look at it as a simple mistake, instead of a big time sin. And even if a big time sin, it can still be repented of, etc. God knows these kind of situations, divorces, knows our hearts, intents, etc. So because of that, if a couple get divorced, we should not be so quick to judge, etc, because maybe a partner is unfairly yelling, screaming at the other partner a lot, etc. And because we are not supposed to judge. Instead we should instead let God Judge, and not try to be a judge ourselves and instead we should try to help people avoid divorcing, if we can, but that if they do divorce, make a mistake, let them make that mistake, and let them repent, try to learn, change from that mistake etc, without judging them.
For those who are looking for an in-depth Biblical perspective on why divorce is okay for Christians, this article is the BEST I've seen! www.divorcehope.com/canchristiansremarryafterdivorce.htm Please always remember that a loving God wants your happiness. He's a God of mercy, tenderness, and forgiveness. He's not going to punish you for your past. There is hope, happiness, and love ahead!
Divorce was the best thing that ever happened to me! We have been apart now for four years and in those four years, I have realized how unhealthy our relationship was. I also realized how unhappy I was. Every day was miserable.
I'm so sorry to hear that! It's SO good that you are out of that relationship now. God bless!
That’s why the Bible advice people to not get married TOO SOON, bc the choice of partner is enormously important since the relationship IS to last FOR LIFE, that’s how GOD sees it n IDGAD what humans say is okay if GOD says it’s NOT. Divorce is allowed if infidelity has happened but that’s the ONLY reason that GOD approves, if divorced on other terms then in GOD’S eyes You’re still married to the other person bc in his eyes that marriage is not over yet - until they die.
If nothing else I am much more compassionate and understanding of other divorcees. More often than not, they got out of abusive relationships and were healing and growing. Remember, divorces do not define us. They are a life experience that will pass.
@@CoachMelannie Sweetheart, God bless and nurture you. 😊
what about mathew 5 32 and romans 7 2-3 . I'm single christian, never married. GOD hates divorce. Jesus said who ever marries a divorced person also commits adultery.
no he didnt. that is very sadly a horrific mistranslation. It says who ever marries a put away women (a women put away without a divorce certificate) is committing adultery. That was addressing an issue of the day where men would send women away without divorcing them. This would socially cripple the women.
@@michaeloates732 It has all the scriptures off the bible in it's original languages, to help translate it for yourself to English. This software is free. This totally makes the dispute of all the different bible translations completely irrelevant. You can figure it out for yourself, not only from comparing different translations from one another , but even use this free software from the original Hebrew, Aramaic, and Greek. This is so cool. :) I'm checking it out now. www.scripture4all.org/download/download_ISA3.php
here's another one www.accordancebible.com/accounts/home/
Thanks for your response. However if you’re separated you are not single and I don’t think you should be leading other people on I don’t think you should be dating if you’re not single. Even if your divorce takes a long time I’m sorry about that. I know it’s a touchy subject for everybody.
Tym Morrison It’s bad to date a divorced person doubt that’s a mistranslation listen to the word.
Many people that I knew when my divorce happened told me that I was a different person after I was away from my ex-wife because of the way we weren't suited to each other. After the initial shock, I was much happier and relieved, and yes, I still have a long way to go before I meet Miss Right. As you say sometimes a divorce is the best option. You handled this hot topic with much sensitivity, more so than others I have met.
Thank you! This topic is close to my heart and I'm am glad it was helpful 😀
@@CoachMelannie yes, it was. Thanks.
I would date someone, who has been divorced.
I was considering dating a woman that has 2 children. She isn't divorced. I would prefer she was divorced than a single mother. Anyway I don't think I'll pursue her any longer. He will always be lurking in the background. He will hate me, naturally. She made a bad choice and if she wants a new man she should find a man that also has children.
I'm a Christian man who used to be an alcoholic and drug addict. I seemed to have more luck dating women before I became a Christian. Christian women don't seem to like me very much.
That has been my experience- dated two Christian women who both cheated on me with men in the church.
Thanks coach. I finally dating again. Took long time. We are working on our relationship. I really hope it can be most beautiful one yet. Im praying for and hoping we can grow towards each other.
How do you justify this when the Bible stated that if you marry someone 's former spouse, you committ adultry? IT is something I often wonder about when I thought about dating a divorcee.
Me too ,...I'm just going to stay away to be safe I don't want to put man's word over God because I want to justify going against the word
Short answer: It depends. If the person is getting divorced because of adultery that is clearly a biblical reason to get divorced. If a person has abandoned their meet some people say yes. In my opinion, I don’t think people should be permanently alone just because they had a contract with the state and believe it or not that’s what goes on a whole lot.
I don’t think emotional infidelity is grounds for divorce but I could be wrong. My wife was emotionally unfaithful to me but I don’t think it’s grounds for me to divorce and remarry unless I’m wrong. Please explain this.
I’m a child of divorced parents just like you Coach Melannie.
I got a divorce in 2012 from my first wife, the mother of my two children. I remarried in 2013, but my second wife passed away in 2017. I've also struggled with depression and substance abuse issues for a large portion of my life. To say that things have been difficult is pretty obvious. I've always considered myself a Christian, but I know that I haven't acted the way I should *way too many times.*
I've been trying to attend church more often, well, listening to our sermons online now with the quarantine, and most of my family is Christian, so there's support there (I just don't know how to get my 16 year old son interested in Christianity, aside from struggling to lead by example, and my 9 year old daughter is quickly losing interest in church, aside from just seeing her cousins there). I don't know, it just really sucks being single, and I know that I have to deal with my drinking to be able to find a healthy relationship, not to mention with God too, but it's a vicious cycle (I've been using for almost 20 years, from alcohol, pills, crack, to full blown IV heroin addiction, I know drinking and smoking weed isn't what I should be doing, and I'm working on that one right now), I get depressed from being alone, which makes drinking and getting high a lot more tempting, and definitely makes lust more tempting (porn), etc.
I know I need help, and I'm trying to make a conscious effort to pray more now. I know there are others out there that have probably been in similar situations and are living a good Christian life (and also aren't miserable without some kind of drugs, I've met plenty of people in both the church and programs like AA/NA that really seemed genuinely happy with sobriety, most of them crediting God).
Any advice or prayers would be appreciated. God bless everyone out there, stay safe!
I'm sorry to hear everything you've been through! It sounds to me though that you have a lot of inner strength. You see how you can improve and are working to do just that. Give yourself credit for those wins! You can totally do this my friend and you are never alone! Jesus is always there for you. As you trust Him (like you are) and pray for help things will get better. I'm sending prayers your way! God bless!
@@CoachMelannie Thank you, God bless you as well!
Sadhguru help you to spiritual and self love is what give you the courage and strength to work on things that has values and to become a better human being. Marissa peer and Esther perel.
You need to get strong first, and develop self-control, before you will be ready to have another relationship. You need to be able to share your strength with your partner, not only be drawing upon theirs. Also, your children will be perceptive to see the fruits of the Spirit in your life and that will be the most powerful witness of Christ’s love and grace that you can give them... I say this, not as someone with all the answers, but as a man who has been through divorce because of my ex-wife’s unfaithfulness. I have come to realise that by dealing with yourself, you will become more attractive and a better catch. God bless
Children see our actions not how we talk, can't talk our ways out of it... when Children sit on the fence it's cause they are watching their peers and parents and if the actions don't align with what being told ,conflict of interest can arise children second guess themselves. Wow I can't trust nothing. I guess that's why higher authorities in church start to lose their shine, so children drop out of church. I know I did at some stage. I'm older now and living from my own responsibilities, and I'm so hungry for the word now.
This is a very difficult topic and you handled it with such grace! When I went through my divorce I found a faith based support group and I was really humbled by the entire experience. I’ve become more aware of my social surroundings and I realized that I was overly patient and hopeful that things would get better.
I'm sorry you had to go through that! God bless 🙏
I was married for 5 years and been divorced for 6 years now. I feel sad because I can't find anyone. Most people I know who went through divorce got back into dating and found someone. No one wants to give me the benefit of the doubt. I've been on two dates after constant online dating and asking women out. It's one and done. I hate everything that has happened to me.
I understand how discouraging and frustrating that can be. If you'd like my help you can email me. coachmelannie.com/contact-me/ God bless 🙏
@@CoachMelannie thanks
I am going through a divorce and this was an uplifting video. Thank you.
I'm so sorry about your divorce. I’m happy the video helped you!😀
free at last
You must ask yourself "will I be able to handle the divorce person's ups and downs"? You also have to ask yourself "am I the divorcees boyfriend or girlfriend or just a support person"? And if young kids are involved do I want the drama?
Those are good questions to ask yourself. God bless! 😀
My brother’s ex-girlfriend Broke is divorced.
Hi Melannie. I am autistic. I was diagnosed 2 years ago at 48. I really struggled to date, have relationship. I got a little better, had a date or relationship every about 5 months to 5 years. And when got in relationships, I was often dumped, cheated on.
I got tired of that. So I tried a date coach program by a Christian called It's Not You It's Your Technique.
After that I started dating, getting into relationships more.
5 years ago I got married. I have a 3 year old Autistic daughter. I am going thru a 1 year long combined separation, divorce, that almost completed.
My issues have been that I get defensive, don't handle her depression, anger, bad stimuli well. Example I forgot to push chair in that usually push in. Daughter climbed chair, got hurt(not permanent). She got angry, yelled, screamed at me. I defensively said that I push chair in most of time, and that didn't know she was coming over with daughter and sorry bout what happened. She just angrier, yelled at me more(This happened during separation)
The other issue was that she wouldn't let me help do things like dishes, etc, but then said I never helped her, causing her to get overwhelmed, despite me changing LOTS of diapers, etc.
Her issues was her depression, anger, yelling, screaming at me, getting easily provoked by me(What I unintentionally said, did, my autistic behaviorisms, etc, would provoke her.)
She also mismanages money, goes --$333+ in the hole every other month, because I when I successfully managed the budget, wouldn't buy a $300 phone, etc, and got tired of arguing, fighting, so I let her manage money instead.
She also doesn't remember the good times, and the good, nice things I do, have done, and only remembers bad stuff. She doesn't thank me, but instead unconstructively, only negatively points out what bad.
We fought a lot over money, other issues. Had counseling, etc.
She is the one who wanted, started the separation, divorce, left me. We with our counselor, had a plan, and I was working the plan, and was trying hard to work things out, but that, it wasn't enough, and so she left me.
My concerns now are, is that after divorce completed, I am a 5-8, 51 year old divorced autistic, ADHD, man that had, survived a stroke 8 months ago.
I feel like a broken man. I wonder if a woman will ever want a man like me. I am trying to be the best possible me, getting counseling, etc, but I still wonder. I am worried that women will hold my divorce against me.
And I am worried about my internal picker, my ability to choose a good woman, recognize red flags, etc. I also wonder if a divorced woman will have issues.
And I am worried that I have issues, baggage that when, if combined with other possible issues, that would just doom a date, relationship, marriage, etc.
So I am scared that I'll be alone the rest of my life, and scared to date, enter a relationship, get married, etc.
And I know that most eligible women age about 40 to 54 are divorced.
I used to wonder why divorced women would take years to even go on a casual first date again. But now that I am divorced, I understand.
I really need your, or someone else's help Melannie, for when, if I do try to date after my divorce is completed. But usually it cost a lot of money.
The It's not you it's your technique program, is, was about $99. I realize that's not a lot of money to some. But it is to me. But it was a fair price, was worth every penny.
I didn't think I would ever need such a program again, if I could afford it.
If you can't help me Melannie, can you steer me to somebody that can, that I would be able to afford.
Sorry for the length.
And thanks for your time, reading this, if you read, reply to this, and for your videos.
Your hair always looks good Coach Melannie.
One thing that I felt disturbing in my divorce after 17 years was, the fact that my now ex-wife was a Christian. We came to church together every time the door was open we prayed together frequently towards the end of our relationship somethings going on with her spiritually. I think people need to keep this in mind though it’s very important just because a person is a Christian a believer just because they’re saved which means that their sins are forgiven doesn’t make them as a person. I happen to think it’s disgusting though if they’re a person male or female would break the Merrill covenant that way. What’s even worse Is the snotty way that people in church get involved. Not everybody goes to church is a Christian and some of them there are Christians it doesn’t mean they’re good just forgiven.
For Christian's, divorce is a handicap. Most churches bylaws are extremely strict on divorce especially for men. If a man marries a divorcee he loses opportunity to serve the church. He cannot be considered for deacon or other privileges. Is that something to consider when you find yourself falling for a divorced woman?
I can't answer for your religion. That is a very personal thing that each man needs to decide for himself. My mom is divorced and I can honestly tell you that she'll make the best wife a man will ever have. It's really a personal decision though. God bless!
@@CoachMelannie Thank you. I'm sure your mother is delightful.
Thank you for this video. I'm divorced and have been for several years. I've dated two women since my divorce and both of them were also divorced. Your video on this subject was really great and enlightening. Again thank you for this video.
I'm so glad it was helpful! Thank you! 😀
Jason Branning
if you divorced from your unfaithful wife is allowence.
But if you dated divorced women, warning! Jesus Lord says : Whoever marries a woman who is divorced, he commits adultery (Matt 5 : 32b, Luke 16 : 18b)
And remember Lord command in 1 Cor 7 : 11 : If a wife does depart/divorced from husband Let her remain unmarried or reconciled to her husband.
If you want ro remarry, you hv to marry a woman who never been married or virgin.
Marry virgin is covenant of marriage
Marry divorcee is adultey (sexual sin)
My mother has been through a divorce.
I’ve been in love for a few years now with a woman that is separated n almost divorced her partner. The marriage is really dead n they’re not ever gonna get back together, in fact I actually told her to ‘patch’ her marriage if possible n she actually tried to but came to realize that it was for no use. I love her but I also love God n I’ve been honest with her that I will NEVER consider marrying her if the divorce isn’t approved by God’s laws in the Bible, n she actually took that to heart which made me really happy bc that means that she’s definitely christian wife material.
There’s really not anything to debate in terms of divorce bc the Bible is really clear on that point: “God HATES divorce”, it states that a divorce is allowed tho but SOLELY if there’s been INFIDELITY, then the innocent partner has right to divorce if they feel that they can’t be together with that person anymore, otherwise ONLY thing that actually can terminate a marriage is if you get WIDOWED - “till DEATH parts us” as they say.
Sounds like you're a stumbling block
That sounds like what happened to me. I wanted to stay true to the wedding vows be she had a much different idea of what marriage was about there was almost no give and much more take. At first it was good but after years of take and no give I dreaded going home. I loved her but she didn't want to improve her life but stay in a very one sided existence 12:12
I have been divorced for ten years now. and have not dated, a few coffee meets, but not really a date.I felt that after my divorce all I wanted was to find myself again, and who I was. My 2 daughters came first since I had them through their teen years. Boy that was fun.Some serious hardships with one of them. I felt it wouldn't be fair to someone other than me to deal with that. As a Christian, I had taken things hard and thought I was tainted in His eyes. Grace has shown me the opposite. the last year I have tried dating sites but have no connection to anyone. God first for me. I have come to the point in life where I will let God move and not me.
I takes time and eyes on God to heal.
God bless 🙏
I'm divorced twice in both cases they broke commandments and the the vows. I will not tolerate such behavior. They broke my trust and faith in women. How dose one come back frome that. I'm not meant to be alone.
The hardest part of divorce for me was the feeling that I was being selfish and that I abandoned my son.
I'm so very sorry!
Are you divorced women. Very bad happened
"Divorce is something you've been through, not who you are" so wise, so true!
Divorce was one of the best things in my life, it was like being born again, again!
I realised who my real friends were... no one. All my "Christian" friends stopped talking with me and sided with my Ex wife. She was emotionally and physically abusive. Took photos of nail marks in my body to prove it, as I instinctively feared no one would ever believe me. They came in handy during the divorce proceedings, lol, (which I won ).
The Bible NEVER condemns divorce, only "putting away". These are two different things.
Divorce is a blessing, a life saver.
Divorce is not a sin, just the result of sin.
Only God truly knows how timely this video was. Thanks Melannie :)
I'm so happy it was helpful and I'm sorry for all you have been through. God bless!
@@CoachMelannie Hi, thanks for your reply. Did you get my email? Every blessing, Simon
It takes 3 to make a marriage work God first a man and a woman marriage is the first step and it must be built on every day for the rest of your lives
That is a great recipe for success! Have a happy day! 😀
My divorce was the best thing for me I'm felt lonely through half my marriage and I also felt hated
I'm sorry to hear that! Sometimes divorce is the best thing to ever happen. Here's to better days ahead!
@@CoachMelannie Thank you for all your videos Melannie. I think you are an interesting speaker, and a funny lecturer. I notice you are not wearing your leather jackets, in this video. I hope your Mum would like me, as a would be boyfriend for you, or that I would be your Mum's type, as I am 55 years of age. Thank you.
wow. Totallyanti what marriage is. What being Christian is. Why does he church celebrate divorce? No wonder the divorce rate is s high. No one has any morals
As far as I am concerned it's not ok to date anyone! Sweet abstinence and celibacy forever.
Yes. The way the laws are turned against men marriage is no longer a viable option. Or dating for that matter. Singleness is the only safe way for men now. This society has abandoned Godly morals and the courts are not good to men in divorce.
Should the divorced person have an annulment?
What a video, It's deep. Thank you Melannie !!!
At the end of the day, a divorced person is still human and still deserves to be happy in life
I agree! I think they deserve to be happy to be able to move on and have a wonderful life! God bless 🙏
@@CoachMelannie I would totally date a divorced woman if one was interested in me. They have a unique feelings on relationships from my experience
@@Montyandrew45
Jesus says : Whoever marries her who is divorced he commits adultery (Matthew 5 : 32b, Luke 16 : 18b
Lord commands : if a wife divorced let her remain unmarried or be reconciled to her husband.
a wife is bound to her husband as long as he lives (not only as long as their marriage) but if her husband dies (not if her husband divorced her) she is free to remarry (1 Corinthians 7 : 11, 39 )
To marry divorced woman you will be one flash to another man's wife and it's called adulterous (sexual sin )
If you not repent and leave her, you both go to hell after dies
@@nitodjiloy7186 while I will never bad mouth anyone's religion as you are free to believe and worship who and what you want, things like this make me not want to go near it at all
@@Montyandrew45
I wrote the Truth of Jesus Words
and I know to whom I believe in and worship, Jesus Christ, Lord God.
Yeah that not good to look down on the person who going through a divorce but you have to find out why the person got a divorce if you get in a relationship with that person!
That's important! Thanks for watching. 🙏
Is there a contradiction in the legal sense between the interpretation of marriage within the Bible versus the United State’s various laws upon marriage? As we leave the confusing Age of Pisces, and approach the humanitarian Aquarian Age, marriage has undergone significant changes in contrasting laws. I do not wish to detract from the message of this endeavor, but many Christians are unaware of the positive correlation of celestial influence as noted in scripture:
Matthew 2:1
Wycliffe Bible (WYC)
1 Therefore when Jesus was born in Bethlehem of Juda, in the days of king Herod, lo! astrologers [lo! kings, or wise men,] came from the east to Jerusalem,
Matthew 2:7-9
Living Bible (TLB)
7 Then Herod sent a private message to the astrologers, asking them to come to see him; at this meeting he found out from them the exact time when they first saw the star. Then he told them, 8 “Go to Bethlehem and search for the child. And when you find him, come back and tell me so that I can go and worship him too!”
9 After this interview the astrologers started out again. And look! The star appeared to them again, standing over Bethlehem.
As I’m Not trying to side track the emphasis of this research, but I must ask my fellow Christians, if the Magi, or wise men being astrologers, if they were of Satan why did they not turn in the child’s where abouts to the evil King Herod after they received a dream from God?
At no time in history has there been so much upheaval regarding marriage and conflict about what is correct, concerning matrimony regarding law and religious integrity. This paper will show some of the devolutionary changes within the United States, and point out Biblical contrasting viewpoints.
This nation claims within it’s documents and nationally recognized songs to have some divine connection to God: “We the People…” have repeated such phrases as, “One nation under God”, “God shed his grace on thee,” In God We Trust”, “God Bless America.” Has the U.S. allowed man made morality to rule in much the same fashion as the San Hedren at the time of Christ in Israel? It is evident that the Council of Nicaea in 325 A.D. in Asia Minor, Roman Imporer Constantine, and many language interpreters have edited and omitted important books regarding the Bible. The Bible, as inspired by the Lord and written by men, has undergone mistranslation. However, it must be understood, regardless of the editing or mistranslations; if our omnipotent all powerful God could not make his point with a crooked stick would he truly be God?
This nation has a large collection of laws regarding marriage and/or sexuality that contradicts Biblical references. The U.S. laws allow a Jew or a Christian whom have been divorced to remarry another of the same faith, and endorses multiple marriages. Most states allow divorces of those within the Jewish or Christian community on grounds other than adultery, and now homosexual marriages are being paraded through the limelight.
Pharisee could mean: a member of an ancient Jewish sect, distinguished by strict observance of the traditional and written law, and commonly held to have pretensions to superior sanctity. The leadership within the Republican Party are they Pharisees if they disregard the words of the prophets Nathan and Isaiah upon marriage? Also we must note are there Democrat leader Pharisees and hypocrisy as they endorse homosexual marriage and support the empowered woman of feminist matriarchal rule, is that a Biblically sound teaching? We can use the Biblical term Pharisee to be defined in modern terms as professions related to our present day attorneys, regretfully some clergy, and many positions within politically derived governmental offices. My own respected pastor says Rush Limbaugh is the epitome of a Pharisee. Do our nation’s laws sanctify hypocrisy if we truly mean, “One Nation Under God”, if we aren’t following the teachings within the Bible?
There are a large collection of scriptures regarding marriage in the Torah and New Testament, but a few inspired by Christ have the heaviest foundation. The Pharisees were testing Christ’s knowledge and interpretation of law, both content and principle, when the following scenario took place:
Matthew 19:3-9
Authorized (King James) Version (AKJV)
3 The Pharisees also came unto him, tempting him, and saying unto him, Is it lawful for a man to put away his wife for every cause? 4 And he answered and said unto them, Have ye not read, that he which made them at the beginning made them male and female, 5 and said, For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh? 6 Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder. 7 They say unto him, Why did Moses then command to give a writing of divorcement, and to put her away? 8 He saith unto them, Moses because of the hardness of your hearts suffered you to put away your wives: but from the beginning it was not so. 9 And I say unto you, Whosoever shall put away his wife, except it be for fornication, and shall marry another, committeth adultery: and whoso marrieth her which is put away doth commit adultery.
Exhibit B, the following verse is translated from one of the scriptures that Jesus was referencing that Moses (an astrologer whom evidently learned the science from the Egyptians as he was a prince and raised as Royalty) wrote in Hebrew:
Deuteronomy 24:1
Complete Jewish Bible (CJB)
1 “Suppose a man marries a woman and consummates the marriage but later finds her displeasing, because he has found her offensive in some respect. He writes her a divorce document, gives it to her and sends her away from his house.
Exhibit C, Moses wrote concerning the sanctity of marriage for the Levite Priests:
Leviticus 21:13-14
Expanded Bible (EXB)
13 “‘The high priest must marry a woman who is a virgin. 14 He must not marry a widow, a divorced woman, or ·a defiled prostitute [or a defiled woman or a prostitute; v. 7]. He must marry a virgin from his own people 15 so ·the people will respect his children as his own [he will not defile his children]. I am the LORD. I have ·set the high priest apart for his special job [sanctified/consecrated him].’”
Exhibit D, Christ further singles out the men of Israel, and the future foundation of his church when he comes down on the Jewish leaders and the mono-theistic community in the following scriptures:
Melannie, I can relate to what you said about divorced people. Frankly, I've been there and had to live with it. Divorce is not something I'm proud of. I've unfortunately been through it 3 times, and because of them my self confidence is shot. I have difficulty finding the courage to even talk with women regarding the possibility of having a relationship, because of having been burned so many times. I've had friends that were women, and at one time they outnumbered my male friends. I could talk with them as friends, but most were either married or in relationships and I would never even broach the idea of a relationship with any of them. I'm the kind of guy that respects the relationships of my friends. Right now, I lived in a new place, and I've only made a select few friends in the area. Before moving here, I lived in an area where I had resided for close to 40 years and had a lot of friends that came and went. I still have friends there, but not as many as I used to have. That was also the area of the country where 2 of my marriages and divorces took place. My only child, a son from all of my marriages, was born in that area. He is now an adult and is in the process of going through a relationship with a young lady himself. All this leaves me in a pretty lonely position, a place where I've been before.
I'm so sorry. It sounds like you've been through some tough things. Please let me know if you'd like my help in some way! melannie@coachmelannie.com God bless 🙏
@@meatpuppet428 That's a very archaic thing to say. Of my 3 divorces, only the first one was filed by myself. My ex-wife was an alcoholic and in a country that was difficult to get her out of. I also want to add that I still carry real physical scars from our relationship. She would get drunk, and fight with me, frequently using her teeth and long finger nails. At one time I thought she might pull a knife on me. The US government prevented her from coming into the country, so in essence I would have been kept from her company. The other two filed against me. The first of those two had psychological and serious emotional problems,. At one time she even pulled a loaded fire arm on me and threaten me. The last one was essentially goaded by her own daughter to file. So there are situations that you can't use your logic on, as they just don't fit. Oh, I might add, yesterday I was notified by my son that his mother, my second wife passed away the night before. So she no longer plays any part in my life except for my only son. To be honest, I never stopped caring for any one of them, including her. I didn't ask for the divorces! They were thrust on me. When I was in the country of my first wife, I saw a marriage that was unhappy, and the couple were permanently separated. They would have divorced if the law of the country would have allowed it, but it didn't. It was my former in-laws.
@@meatpuppet428 I'm sorry to say this, but you need to bring your thinking up to the 21st century. Thinking like you are talking about went out with the Dark Ages. Women have rights now and aren't thought
of as chattel property of the men any more. Back then men had to control women by making them conform to so called religious norms and obey men. That is no longer the case, and I resent that you put this lady down by making your statements that her videos go against God. Your attitude is so close minded, and painfully out of date. I will also add that I can see, that with your attitude about women, it's no wonder why you've gone over half your life without a relationship and a quarter of it without even a date. This is the last thing I will say to you about the matter.
What about if I'm the one divorced?"
I really enjoy this video so much. Thank you.
you are spot on; I went through a divorce in 2012. we had a daughter together we both was on good terms. my ex married this guy who was raising his two sons. we all get along great he is a great. I really think it was a blessing for us to get a divorce. now I'm looking for my other half.
Thanks for your kind words! I'm so happy things worked out good for you. God bless! 😀
@@meatpuppet428 I don't think you need to judge someone unless you know the whole story of the divorce! you ever thought maybe God had me married this woman for a reason and maybe God had this woman to divorce me for a reason. i will say this though i know God a lot better than I did when I was married. It was a blessing.
Divorce is soul destroying. The lowest of the multitude of lows that i have experienced. The ultimate failure.
I'm so sorry about that. I watched my mom go through that and I know how difficult it is! God bless 🙏
Don't let it be the ultimate failure and don't let it destroy you. FIGHT THOSE FEELINGS.
I feel very much the same way in a lot of situations in this all has to do with love and that has the makings of a wonderful story. Keep up the good work Melanie. It's hard for me to come up with words at this point in time because I waited so long hopefully the words will start falling into place as everything else seems to be. You have such a nice voice I'd love to talk to you.
Yeah my husband left me for drugs 4 years ago and just recently got divorced. Abandonment and cheating are perfect biblical reasons to divorce but unfortunately even though I have been alone most through the marriage and when he was gone,. Christian men avoid me like a plague and its heartbreaking to me. i just recently want to date but i think i forgot how.
I'm so very sorry to hear you've been through so much!
@@CoachMelannie Prayers are needed. There must be hope out there.
@@hannahking1984 hello where are you from. I become very sad because very bad happened with you 😭😭
@@hemant8755 Ohio
@@hannahking1984 very bad happened with you
I finally met a woman and we really like eachother. She is going through finalizing her divorce. My question is, once she is divorced and if I Marry her will we be living in Adultery?
It is my personal belief that God does not want us to stay in unhappy/unhealthy relationships. Divorce is not ideal but God certainly doesn't want us to live our lives alone. I am not a preacher however I believe in a kind God who focuses on the future instead of the past. I do not believe it is a sin to move on and progress. I hope that helps!
@@CoachMelannie Thank you for responding. Although most my study leads me to see it as Adultery. I'm very confused on this matter.
@@thomasusheriii971 There are different positions about this... My understanding is: “sexual immorality” (i.e. adultery) is the biblical reason for getting a divorce. So, assuming her partner committed adultery, then she is free to remarry. If her partner is an unbeliever but didn’t commit adultery, then she can divorce him but not remarry, because reconciliation is still possible (e.g. if he were to become a Christian).
Some Christians (e.g. John Piper) have argued it is not right for Christians to remarry even after adultery. I don’t personally agree with this view of Scripture, but you’ll need to look into the arguments and decide for yourself.
It is worth pointing out that marriage is an earthly institution, and symbolic, not binding in heaven (e.g. Matthew 22:30) and its binding nature is more based upon giving a vow (let your “yes” be yes) than upon a spiritual state of unity (despite the reference to two becoming one flesh - a metaphor).
@@AndyJMacLeod
I'm sorry, but this is a little light in the details of the scripture.
Mat 5 31-32
Mark 10 2-9
Luke 16:18
1st Cor 7:39
Are quite clear, there is a standard by God's Law, not what we want it to be to suit our own personal feelings. God does want us to move forward but in righteousness. I like Coach Melanie as I recently found her, alot of good tips but if I'm honest, you have to be careful and not be haste on her response, take more time in scripture, Melanie openly said she is not a preacher. You go to a cardiologist to see about your heart not a nurse. Melanie seems good to acquire, maintain a healthy relationship but I would not rely my obedience to it. Please, I mean no disrespect to anybody but all the videos I have seen up to this point, I haven't came across the one where she mentions pray together, read scripture together, maybe hang out with accountability tk prevent those sexual temptations, let's be real. It's hard being alone for some. Again, no disrespect, I like Melanie up to this point but I had to say something.
You need to assess the scenari before hooking up with another person. Scriptures clearly state, it's not a metaphor. Marriage is vow that bonds not only in the physical but the spiritual, that is why It hurts so much when it fails. Plus it also shows your commitment to God, if you can break this what does that say about you. I struggle with this myself at times.
@@paulvega3 I’m sorry but I’m not really sure what your comment is getting at... please clarify.
I think the lady I've been texting isn't ready to date yet 3 years after her divorce and I'm still going through mine 8 months being alone and she says I'm not ready either. But I'm attracted to her unfortunately for me and I would like someone to be a companion.
I'm so sorry to hear that. These videos might help you with this if you decide to move on from her. ua-cam.com/play/PLsQq0KK7pJ-VSJTPh27Xb7RNm14DvYN8X.html Let me know if I can help!
@@CoachMelannie how long should I give her before moving on?
@@meatpuppet428
If a wife cheated by her husband and divorces, she has to remain unmarried. She is free to remarry if her former husband dies.
Jesus forbides you (man) marry a woman who is divorced bcz its adultery.
@@evinevlin5124 as if ur perfect 😝
Interesting after only one minute how she mention people want to stay away from it because it might be catching the women in the church is don’t ever want their husband hanging around with a man that’s going through or been through a divorce quite frankly ask because the snotty ...... want total control of their husbands. Also, women don’t want their husbands being around a man that successfully navigates a bad divorce. I went through a terrible divorce and by the grace of God the custody battle was one and the prom with women and they can be quite evil if they think they’re entitled to the children, all the money, and every other thing. They feel like their men should burn in hell for eternity even if it wasn’t his idea. Don’t misunderstand, the fellows do wrong things too. My best advice as a believer in Jesus for the last 46 years is to prayerfully approach her problems try to make your marriage work but just because you’re Christian does not mean you have got to be tied down because your mate decided to betray you! I’ll tell you again right now just because a person is saying doesn’t mean they’re nice.
Is this advice based on scripture or your opinion?
Hi Melannie, I recently joined eharmony. I'm seeing women on their who's marital status is separated! That's right, their not even divorced and their looking to date already. What's up with these woman?
Wow, that is unfortunate! I'd stay clear of them!
Coach Melannie Thanks for the reply Melannie, I was thinking it might be a red flag.
OK I'm gonna chime in here @coachmelanie give them some grace. I'm currently separated and in dating sites. Divorce can take a long long time. Your reaction is honestly judgemental. Think about these people myself included our marriages are over we are simply waiting for the paper that says so. I have a friend that was separated for seven years due to no fault of her own. Should she not be aloud to date because of this even tho her marriage was completely over. Dating for a believer should not be sexual, but surely it is OK to be in a caring relationship or at least exploring the options. Imagine if you were in their shoes. Be kind.
@@michaeloates732 I have a laugh for you. I once went on Eharmony looking for someone to have a relationship with and one of my last matches with was my ex-wife. My only comment was "oh heck no" and I frankly quit that service. The profile picture she put on the application looked like she was mad at the world when it was taken.😒
@@ronkrueger-capt_koron6112 😮😮😂😂 yikes that would scare you away for sure
I have been through more than one divorce unfortunately. It seems I always picked the wrong type of woman. I'm 58 year's old this year. Scared of dating again. But don't want to live by myself forever. I like your view point on these matter's. Thank you for helping us guy's coach Melanie.
You are very welcome! You can email me if you have questions. melannie@coachmelannie.com Take care! 😀
@@meatpuppet428 I have read the King James Bible Several time's. I don't remember seeing anything like what your stating. Plus it's a no no to remarry someone you divorce. I don't know where your getting that information from. Just saying.
I am single, just met someone who is a divorcee man. He connected but disclosed me about divorce after 1.5 Months. Actually I am having betrayed feeling. but it's but difficult for me to come out of that great connection I had developed. Could you please guide whether I should go further with this relationship or not?
I'm sorry to hear that happened! I totally see why you feel the way you do. I can't tell you what to do of course but if you feel that he purposefully kept the truth from you it could be a big red flag that you can't trust him. There's always the possibility that he was nervous to tell you as well. I'm working on creating a new UA-cam channel for Coaching women. Be sure to follow me here and I'll share when it's up and running! God bless!
@@CoachMelannie Thank you 💕
can i help you.
@@komalsharma4667 because i am in india
Well I'm Engaged to be married on April 4 and he used to talk about his ex-wife all the time he still does some time to time so feels like he's comparing me to her
Yikes! I'm really sorry to hear that. Are you ok with that???
The problem is that the Bible seems to say that if a divorced man or woman marry someone else it's adultery. Except if a nonbeliever abandons you.
That’s a difficult passage. Seems like God expects people to remain married even though the other spouse beats you, lies to you, ignores or mocks you.
Why would people live under such a yoke??
@@AaronBr00mfie7d Most people I know would say that it's ok to separate and get to safety, except for the most extreme view which states you must submit to the husband even if he's physically and emotionally abusing you. I agree that stance is just terrible!
How bout single father's who have kids under 18. What would you suggest for them to build a new, positive relationship with someone. What you tell women who are hesitant about dating single father's due to negative stigma, social-econamic conserns that have been said. Saying most single father's are wrong to date or they're so much Drama and BS. They're of lower status etc so date up etc perhaps you can do a video bout it ? The pros of dating single father's...or something???
That's a great idea for a video! I'm so sorry for the unkind things some people say. I personally believe that single parents can become the very best partners. This goes for both men and women. Feel free to email me if I can help coachmelannie.com/contact-me/
@@CoachMelannie most of the time I see single moms are the ones who seems to have a ( get a new relationship 1st) as u said in a video they're moving up to a better economic-social status. While the single dad oftentimes remains @ a lower status. Although women give him respect for being involved in his kids lives. They don't want to date him because of either drama, jealousy or they feel his resources: money time & attention are focused on his kids and not her needs, goals and wants in her life So she either friend zone s,keeping @ great distance or ghosts him for someone who can give her the things she wants in live for herself. She maybe doing the situation to all the men in her life. In psychology (human behavior)I think the term is called " hypergamy". This can be very tough on men especially emotionally and mentally and can be very draining to be constantly rejected because he's trying to do the right thing and be a father to his kids the best way he knows how with very little support or anything which most of the time women get more support understanding etc then the father's. They're expected to provide for 2 households. Give to the mom "without question or accountability. Everytime that's with or without a new boyfriend/ husband in the picture who may make more than the dad so everyone looks down at the dad for now doing what the bf does. Sometimes the mom will try to alienate the kids or brainwashing them against the dad so she can have a better life with the new bf that she's put in the father's role because he's giving her what she wants in her life. There's great Step father's who do an awesome job giving support not saying anything bad bout that at all This has been my experience as a single father's. I'm not the only one. I'm sure other single father's have it worse than this. I'm always told be patient the right one is out there. I know God's got it covered. Because I'm his kid. It does get tiring having to do everything by urself. Have had to go to therapy to be able to understand all of this with the clarity I've said in this message. Not everyone has that opportunity or can see the red flags I've seen thru this process. Still learning to go thru it like when Jesus was with the discipline s as they went through the storm. They got to the other side with Jesus being there love ue channel it's a blessing from God
Hey Melanie I just want to ask you is that your natural hair colour
Yes it is!
Hi Melannie , I have been devorced 3 times all 3 where for infidelity on their part . I will take some of the blame I worked a jod that was very demanding my last devorce was in 2002 I have been in a few relationships since them and had stopped dating and I am ready to get back in to dating and I have moved back to my home town which has changed a whole lot most of the places to meet women are at bars and I am a Christian man I go to a big church and I am not finding any single women there . I would really like to find a Christian woman to marry and I have lost my ability to to be a little snarky and banter with women in conversations I need some help.in this area thank you.
I'm sorry that has happened to you! One thing to consider is to make sure you know the signs of a toxic woman. Knowing these signs will help you avoid women like that in the future and attract a happy relationship instead. Here are some videos on that ua-cam.com/play/PLsQq0KK7pJ-VyeTDmwCE46a85Pme0uqRA.html In addition to these videos I have an online course that teaches how to stay aware from bad relationships and attract healthy/happy relationships. Here's a link so you can check it out coachmelannie.com/bad-relationships-be-free-forever/ I also have an online course that will teach you how to find and attract the type of woman you are looking for. Here is a link coachmelannie.com/how-to-get-a-girlfriend/ You've got this my friend!
Thank you sir for actually paying close attention to the rules in the Bible!!! I’m appalled by the large amount of ‘christians’ who still think it’s allowed to divorce for whatever reason, n not just infidelity, they don’t realize that THAT’s actually the fact why the Bible says that your choice of partner is so important bc that relationship n marriage is meant to be LITERALLY FOR LIFE n only a cheating partner is a approved reason for divorcing them.
I’ve actually myself advised a woman I’ve been in love with for a few years to NOT divorce her husband, that’s right, I’m in love with her n I’d definitely want her to be my wife but fully aware of that she’ll not be available for an other only God knows how long time I’ve told her to stay with her husband...simply bc I can’t ask God to bless our relationship if she’s been freed in the wrong way. No relationship will last if God is not part of it. I don’t want to ‘win’ her faster bc of a unscriptural divorce n then God cannot bless our relationship, I want a lasting relationships with her if she’ll be my wife n God is a natural part of it for me. I’d rather have to wait for her 10 or 15 years extra then enjoying ‘the temporary pleasure of sin’ n loose God’s approval.
NO ABSOLUTELY NOT. That is unless you DON'T mind spending years basically piecing the human version of a used car back together again and dealing with all the damage that has been done by the previous owner and this isn't just a assumption I lived it and swore I'd never do it again. NOW the only way I'll ever consider dating a woman is "no divorces and no children". It's just not worth it when you can just find someone newer and with less mileage.
Thanks for a good tip.
Hi friend i m interested divorecd but
Relationship possible reply
im off to stop caring think i was chasing to much its her turn next or ive got my answer
Jesus Christ says. "What God has joined together, do not separate." You just clarified that you jump from guy to guy. How can you say you're a follower of Jesus Christ and give advice. Best advice, stop standing between Jesus Christ and those who seek The Truth and The Life.
I'm not here to debate with you. If you really are the Godly, person you claim to be you won't come to my channel and bad talk, me, my beliefs and opinions on my own videos. Thank you. Have a nice day.
@@CoachMelannie I admire your kindness and spirit of grace. You said some very good things in this video. Here’s the problem though...Christ was very clear in Matthew 19 and Matthew 5 when He stated that only in a case of sexual unfaithfulness can a person divorce his or her spouse. This is a very touchy topic indeed, but as Christians, we need to take heed what Christ told us in scripture.
@@midnightexpress726 You admire her kindness and spirit for giving people mis information that will lead them to hell?
There are so many ‘christians’ today that doesn’t consider the rule for scriptural divorce worth following, simply bc it means that you actually have to be held responsible for whatever choice you make. God said a marriage is FOR LIFE n he only approves divorce if there’s been infidelity n the innocent person feel that they cannot live together with that person anymore. The Bible is clear that “God HATES divorce” n that’s bc divorcing was never even INTENDED to be n that’s why the choice of partner was so darn important bc they were to be your partner FOR LIFE n not just till it wasn’t fun anymore. Unhappiness is not a reason for divorce!, the Bible has many useful principles that if applied properly will create a good lasting relationship n marriage. The Bible puts enormous pressure on the husband on how to treat his wife in a way that God actually DEMANDS him to do, it actually says that if he DOESN’T treat her that way he’s prayers may be blocked n he won’t be blessed by God n that’s a recipe for catastrophe.
@@waudicas
Infidelity does not mean only just never cheating, never having a sexual affair.
There are many ways that a person can be guilty of infidelity. That ranges from abuse, being manipulative, controlling, not fulfilling your responsibilities, etc.
Example, if a wife or husband is doing cocaine, and or gambling away all money irresponsibly so that there not enough to pay bills, rent, to the point of homelessness, etc, then that is, can be a example of infidelity.
Even irreconcilable differences, arguments, can be infidelity. If a spouse is constantly unfairly yelling, screaming at you, that can be infidelity.
And there's stuff like that, that might be infidelity that might be difficult to perceive as infidelity.
Because of that, if there are LEGIT irreconcilable LEGIT differences, that helped lead to a divorce, that divorce could be ok or not in God's eyes, and only God would know that or not.
But even if a married couple makes a mistake 0:05 and mistakenly divorces because they think that their partner is unfairly yelling, screaming at them all the time, and they don't think they can take that anymore, then Jesus understands that we are not perfect, that we make mistakes, and gives the chance to Repent, change, learn, etc, so that if such a divorce happens, God can look at it as a simple mistake, instead of a big time sin.
And even if a big time sin, it can still be repented of, etc.
God knows these kind of situations, divorces, knows our hearts, intents, etc.
So because of that, if a couple get divorced, we should not be so quick to judge, etc, because maybe a partner is unfairly yelling, screaming at the other partner a lot, etc.
And because we are not supposed to judge.
Instead we should instead let God Judge, and not try to be a judge ourselves and instead we should try to help people avoid divorcing, if we can, but that if they do divorce, make a mistake, let them make that mistake, and let them repent, try to learn, change from that mistake etc, without judging them.
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Thank you so much! Jesus bless you!
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