First Contact (feat. Daniel Howell)

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  • Опубліковано 3 січ 2025

КОМЕНТАРІ • 11 тис.

  • @danielhowell
    @danielhowell 7 років тому +25711

    this is actually a factual documentary about what would happen if tom and i went to a house party

    • @adnarimsc
      @adnarimsc 7 років тому +321

      Send me that relatable box pls

    • @Cat-hb2vt
      @Cat-hb2vt 7 років тому +124

      Daniel Howell this is also me at parties

    • @karinb4946
      @karinb4946 7 років тому +178

      I have a feeling this sketch was created by experience....

    • @myownnovember
      @myownnovember 7 років тому +51

      Daniel Howell youre brilliant omg, fantastic job on this

    • @SkittlesandBlood
      @SkittlesandBlood 7 років тому +16

      Papa

  • @karlarojas792
    @karlarojas792 7 років тому +7706

    how to know this is fictional:
    Dan is giving advice on how to socialize

    • @karlarojas792
      @karlarojas792 7 років тому +164

      try two guns

    • @Lu22H
      @Lu22H 7 років тому +14

      trashy katla nice like bot

    • @MJeditsx
      @MJeditsx 7 років тому +11

      trashy katla yup. He did kinda change though.

    • @karlarojas792
      @karlarojas792 7 років тому +7

      Luc- Hart- funny how i don't have a like bot

    • @Lu22H
      @Lu22H 7 років тому +5

      trashy katla oh really, 1.8k likes with 2 replies that aren't you? That's obviously not a like bot or anything...

  • @ameliah5201
    @ameliah5201 7 років тому +6631

    The weirdest thing about this video is not the alien but the fact that dan is teaching someone else how to socialize

    • @polkaface9086
      @polkaface9086 7 років тому +80

      And seeing a picture of Ted Cruz on the the paper at 1:43. That's also weird.

    • @virekin0t719
      @virekin0t719 7 років тому +17

      Literally

    • @instantramen8701
      @instantramen8701 7 років тому +5

      Amelia H ikr

    • @richardbottom9843
      @richardbottom9843 7 років тому +7

      that's not weird. it's just a dead meme at this point

    • @riley_6363
      @riley_6363 6 років тому +3

      Amelia H IMAGINE? DAN!

  • @weezingargonian6523
    @weezingargonian6523 4 роки тому +1643

    Of course, the classic,
    “Do you want kids? Cos I’ve got a whole bag of ‘em.”

    • @Pip200ne
      @Pip200ne 3 роки тому +18

      Are you free tonight? Cause I don’t have money

    • @fandomz-uv1xz
      @fandomz-uv1xz Рік тому

      ​@@Pip200ne*Slaps Tom*

    • @Jazzified1541
      @Jazzified1541 Рік тому +3

      @@fandomz-uv1xz We're forgetting how he wacked the bag when the children were crying.

    • @Skeleto.p
      @Skeleto.p Рік тому

      cos who doesn't?

    • @iamjjanimates
      @iamjjanimates 11 місяців тому

      "Stop it!"​@@Jazzified1541

  • @exmitter236
    @exmitter236 6 років тому +1714

    “How do you think she feels?”
    *squishy*

  • @mariumh6753
    @mariumh6753 5 років тому +8079

    We’ve all had those moments when we’re holding a gun for a friend and everyone assumes it’s ours.

    • @loganzagaming
      @loganzagaming 5 років тому +134

      Hate it when the police take them away too

    • @mnstercandeh665
      @mnstercandeh665 5 років тому +27

      Yep

    • @therealtrue842
      @therealtrue842 5 років тому +42

      *laughs in New Zealand gun laws*

    • @austinpayne9996
      @austinpayne9996 5 років тому +14

      Last night in a nutshell

    • @blax140
      @blax140 4 роки тому +22

      Especially when your in a school than you hear pumped up kicks and your like " oh yeah that's the good stuff" and whilst dancing you shoot a couple of kids

  • @Mosiedawn
    @Mosiedawn 5 років тому +10586

    "Well how do you think she feels?"
    *_ˢ qᵘⁱ ˢʰ ʸ_*

    • @amongsus6927
      @amongsus6927 5 років тому +216

      I want to like this but it's going to ruin the 69
      👍

    • @macje1778
      @macje1778 5 років тому +124

      @@amongsus6927 it's been ruined you can like it now

    • @amongsus6927
      @amongsus6927 5 років тому +55

      @@macje1778 :(

    • @c4tm340w
      @c4tm340w 5 років тому +32

      How did you do that effect?!

    • @marielapascal2879
      @marielapascal2879 4 роки тому +11

      @@amongsus6927 lmao

  • @blameitontheghost
    @blameitontheghost 3 роки тому +1200

    "I'm so upset."
    "Well, how do you think she feels?"
    "Squishy..."

  • @jean-eg1sw
    @jean-eg1sw 7 років тому +2389

    "How do you think she feels?"
    *"Squishy.."*

  • @red_nailsss
    @red_nailsss 5 років тому +5488

    Director: how much of Dan Howells personality do you want this?
    Tom: yes

  • @therealplaguerat
    @therealplaguerat 3 роки тому +2145

    "Are you free tonight,because I don't have any money."
    With a line like that,Tom got what he deserved

  • @Fugginyomom
    @Fugginyomom 6 років тому +951

    "How do you think she feels"
    " *squishy* "

  • @JamesTheFoxeArt
    @JamesTheFoxeArt 5 років тому +7033

    This Dan is a clone, called “date advice Dan”

  • @gardengnome5267
    @gardengnome5267 6 років тому +2035

    "hey, do you want kids? cuz I got a whole bag of 'em right here."
    " *sigh*... what about 2 guns?"

  • @chicafischbach4211
    @chicafischbach4211 4 роки тому +3307

    Tom: *reaches out for a handshake*
    Dan: *Proceeds to accept it*
    Also Dan: NO NOT TO ME

    • @lukesgs501
      @lukesgs501 4 роки тому +14

      100%

    • @lavenderwalrus9875
      @lavenderwalrus9875 4 роки тому +94

      the british dont refuse an introduction that would be the height of bad form

    • @lawliamsonic
      @lawliamsonic 4 роки тому +36

      It's natural instinct.

    • @ShadowSearcher31
      @ShadowSearcher31 3 роки тому +24

      Dan: *reaches for nothing*
      Random arm: *materializes*

    • @gamer_guz
      @gamer_guz 3 роки тому +10

      Tom used his telekinetic powers and lifted Dan’s arm up to shake it

  • @Top10Archive
    @Top10Archive 7 років тому +1698

    "I panicked." haha!

    • @RainbowIce
      @RainbowIce 7 років тому +2

      IClimbedOutTheBackDoorAndLeftAMark OMG SHXJDJDKRSKDKCJDJD

    • @indiaharrison638
      @indiaharrison638 7 років тому +6

      IClimbedOutTheBackDoorAndLeftAMark EVERYONE KNOWS ITS YOU MISS JACKSON

    • @nyamnyam8947
      @nyamnyam8947 7 років тому +5

      IClimedOutTheBackDoorAndLeftAMark shame on you, Miss Jackson

    • @madcomicdialogue
      @madcomicdialogue 7 років тому

      Top10Archive HOLY SHIT!! YOU ARE THE REAL FLIPPING DUDE---

    • @someoneunknown7655
      @someoneunknown7655 7 років тому +2

      If looks could kill thEN YOU MUST BE THE ZODIAC KILLER! IVE FOUND YOU!!

  • @willarmitage8779
    @willarmitage8779 7 років тому +3457

    'What was that?'
    'A bust'
    GIVE THIS MAN A MEDAL

    • @bronk2222
      @bronk2222 7 років тому +39

      When the two jokes where put so close together, I thought it was unplanned.

    • @ししの66
      @ししの66 7 років тому +130

      How do you think she feels?
      "Squishy"
      Lungs in orbit

    • @eyeball_or1gami
      @eyeball_or1gami 7 років тому +7

      I thought he said "I bussed"...

    • @debbiesingleton9439
      @debbiesingleton9439 5 років тому +2

      Squishy

    • @englethree9631
      @englethree9631 4 роки тому +1

      SQUSHY

  • @aoki9952
    @aoki9952 7 років тому +4956

    dan: gives social advices
    also dan: wears a "don't talk to me" cardboard box over his head

  • @DJ_Sonic09
    @DJ_Sonic09 3 роки тому +97

    I have watched this so many times and never noticed that at 0:19 the beer Dan gets Tom after asking "another rough night?" is called "rough night beer"

    • @zoh4242
      @zoh4242 3 роки тому +2

      Omg ur right

  • @naseyderulid3249
    @naseyderulid3249 7 років тому +3918

    i don't remember this episode of doctor who

    • @itsmikki69
      @itsmikki69 7 років тому +4

      Frank the fuqen toilet 😂

    • @teemckenzie4975
      @teemckenzie4975 7 років тому +3

      Frank the fuqen toilet Lol

    • @mnemo-nyx5750
      @mnemo-nyx5750 7 років тому +6

      Frank the fuqen toilet
      Totally would watch it XD

    • @maclunkeymedia7289
      @maclunkeymedia7289 7 років тому +28

      Actually it's a deleted scene from Galaxy Quest

    • @addisonarnold5444
      @addisonarnold5444 7 років тому +2

      Frank the fuqen toilet STOP 😂😂

  • @benrs99
    @benrs99 7 років тому +2156

    It's funny that Dan is being portrayed as having knowledge of social interactions ;)

    • @hurricanesteveharvey1971
      @hurricanesteveharvey1971 7 років тому +3

      Ben Sturrock lmao true

    • @Ella-jk7rq
      @Ella-jk7rq 7 років тому +16

      I didn't know dan was so bad at social interaction that he brings two guns and a bag of children to impress someone😂

    • @tree4364
      @tree4364 7 років тому +7

      Ella Dan is the one who had the box on his head at the end, not Tom, the one trying to talk to Fiona

    • @Ella-jk7rq
      @Ella-jk7rq 7 років тому +2

      tree lol I know who Dan is

    • @gecko2023
      @gecko2023 7 років тому +9

      This dan is a clone
      socially comfortable Dan

  • @MissCute20601
    @MissCute20601 7 років тому +679

    omg when Dan "threw" the gun at the alien

  • @MeAMoose
    @MeAMoose 4 роки тому +379

    3:22 *inaccurate* . We all know the Righteous Bison is completely useless.

    • @ShadowSearcher31
      @ShadowSearcher31 3 роки тому +2

      Must’ve had low hp from talking to people

    • @Jhood05SCP
      @Jhood05SCP 3 роки тому +38

      The fact that Tom didn't know it was the righteous bison makes it funnier

    • @memesmemes300
      @memesmemes300 2 роки тому +3

      tf u talkin about the bison is simply the best weapon

    • @jaidencracknell2326
      @jaidencracknell2326 Рік тому +4

      @@memesmemes300 Nah man the best weapon of all time is the classic

    • @sassano.
      @sassano. Рік тому

      ​@@jaidencracknell2326are you dumb? Of course is the baby face blaster

  • @reddonkey-smokeysquidstudi1570
    @reddonkey-smokeysquidstudi1570 7 років тому +1451

    "How do you think she feels?"
    'Squishy...'

    • @samantham.5742
      @samantham.5742 7 років тому +37

      reddonkey frickin awesome line

    • @DeathnoteBB
      @DeathnoteBB 7 років тому +13

      reddonkey I cannot get over how he said that line.

    • @Hana9916
      @Hana9916 7 років тому +5

      ''What was that?''
      ''A bust''
      Do you guys get it? Bust?

    • @selinalindberga1784
      @selinalindberga1784 7 років тому

      HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET 1.2K LIKES!??!

  • @qxibyuz
    @qxibyuz 7 років тому +283

    that escalated quickly like 20 times

  • @thekrillster3331
    @thekrillster3331 4 роки тому +328

    The girl must have been SUPER into Tom to let him try so many times

    • @blueblurfan6303
      @blueblurfan6303 11 місяців тому

      How the hell is there no replies?

    • @QuietDust
      @QuietDust 9 місяців тому

      ​@@blueblurfan6303I dunno

    • @perryorbit5304
      @perryorbit5304 8 місяців тому

      @@QuietDust me neither.

    • @zalxw
      @zalxw 4 місяці тому

      he loaded his save state

  • @tiredolddude8910
    @tiredolddude8910 7 років тому +2277

    Dan stands awkwardly in the corner....starts giving out good advice...ends up with two guns....
    Yep defo Daniel

    • @regret6222
      @regret6222 6 років тому +5

      why was I not surprised

    • @ashtonhoward5582
      @ashtonhoward5582 4 роки тому +5

      3 guns, actually, unless he gave back the first one.

  • @SirEriol
    @SirEriol 5 років тому +2488

    D.- What was that?
    T.- A bust.
    Clever Tom.

    • @the_deadcrafter8223
      @the_deadcrafter8223 5 років тому +3

      SirEriol I don’t get it, please esplain

    • @mrprettycheeze
      @mrprettycheeze 5 років тому +4

      @@the_deadcrafter8223 A bust is bewbs

    • @zahidmagana7732
      @zahidmagana7732 5 років тому +6

      More like cleavage Tom amirite fellas e.e

    • @mrprettycheeze
      @mrprettycheeze 5 років тому +6

      @@zahidmagana7732 Ladies and gentlemen...
      We've found a genius..
      *claps* good one

    • @zahidmagana7732
      @zahidmagana7732 5 років тому

      @@mrprettycheeze Oh, thanks good sir

  • @tatallan8019
    @tatallan8019 7 років тому +857

    "there are plenty of fish in the sea but some of those fish will die alone or get eaten by bears" - dan howell

    • @b1acksteve
      @b1acksteve 7 років тому +4

      Deep?

    • @aly0243
      @aly0243 7 років тому +2

      kpopity bopity Daniel*

    • @maxord11
      @maxord11 7 років тому +2

      b1acksteve No, most fish eaten by bears swim in shallow rivers.

    • @ammoniainmywater57
      @ammoniainmywater57 7 років тому

      Humans aren't my taste

  • @bigslerp
    @bigslerp 3 роки тому +56

    “How do you think she feels?”
    “Squishy.”

  • @byulvrse6628
    @byulvrse6628 7 років тому +651

    How to steal a chair 101
    1. Ask if the seat is taken
    2. Proceed to steal chair
    3. Now you have a free chair!!

    • @tomheaden2538
      @tomheaden2538 7 років тому +13

      bunny adorbs ok cool thanks

    • @belugaval144
      @belugaval144 7 років тому +11

      even if they say "yes it is taken"

    • @ava.a5604
      @ava.a5604 7 років тому +1

      c-c-c chair no no NOOOOOO

  • @eighty-five-eighty-twomari2258
    @eighty-five-eighty-twomari2258 7 років тому +577

    "Hi I'm Tom"
    "Hi I'm Tom"
    -
    "How'd she feel?"
    "Squishy"
    -
    "Try try try a-"
    "Try a gun"
    -
    TOM STOP IT
    IM DYING

  • @DrawMyCelebrityLife
    @DrawMyCelebrityLife 7 років тому +3276

    DAS VEWY NICE

  • @badhumour2492
    @badhumour2492 4 роки тому +114

    Me talking to a murderer who just stabbed me: “Are you TomSka? Cause you make me die on the floor”

  • @esaht1
    @esaht1 7 років тому +908

    This is actual original content, you can never guess what will happen next.

    • @hunlepto2239
      @hunlepto2239 7 років тому +151

      That's why Tomska's videos are the best, they are random and have alot of dark humour:D

    • @nixcleon
      @nixcleon 7 років тому +30

      Gun?
      *Two guns?*

  • @carpsandcarnage7284
    @carpsandcarnage7284 7 років тому +658

    Dan: how do you think she feels?!..
    Tom: *squishy*

  • @heatherxox7202
    @heatherxox7202 7 років тому +1098

    A month without uploading
    He comes back with a dan

    • @robbiee3479
      @robbiee3479 7 років тому +3

      ya Dan of all people

    • @mayahuel2801
      @mayahuel2801 7 років тому +11

      So prepare for the aliens to attack and by that I mean kiss

    • @DragonFang409
      @DragonFang409 7 років тому +6

      Angelix first thing first your both adorably smol

    • @wariela3004
      @wariela3004 7 років тому +7

      Its cute you look like a couple and what? You just missed phil

    • @lolajane222
      @lolajane222 7 років тому

      Niceeeee

  • @dr.ninjake
    @dr.ninjake 4 роки тому +144

    Damn, with Tom's gun obsession, you'd almost assume he's American.

    • @JB_inks
      @JB_inks 6 місяців тому +1

      Not to mention the way he pronounces half of his words in an American accent

  • @indiand6460
    @indiand6460 7 років тому +537

    Me: "that's my socialising quota up for the month"

  • @user-od9dy7hx3w
    @user-od9dy7hx3w 7 років тому +833

    R.I.P. Fiona, the most patient girl on the planet.

    • @thecrowlady13
      @thecrowlady13 6 років тому +14

      Dylan Entwistle or forgetful

    • @ingeaten
      @ingeaten Рік тому +2

      ​@@thecrowlady13Eda!

  • @leens4519
    @leens4519 7 років тому +416

    Omg dans wearing the top that he made Phil wear in PINOF 9

    • @indigo365
      @indigo365 7 років тому +5

      Dan And Phil Fan Called Eleni the one where he looked like a “vampire” 😂

    • @leens4519
      @leens4519 7 років тому +2

      Amandaت EXACTLY he looks like a vampire

    • @CandiCarcass-dk5hc
      @CandiCarcass-dk5hc 6 років тому

      Dan And Phil Fan Called Eleni WOW

    • @leens4519
      @leens4519 6 років тому +2

      the blue diamond wolf I love that top so much

    • @jessavhole2847
      @jessavhole2847 6 років тому +1

      I know, I got so happy when I saw it. Idk why but I love that shirt

  • @loucar1067
    @loucar1067 4 роки тому +167

    Dan: where did the aliens come from?
    Tom: came from the hole
    HOLE MUSIC

  • @redlightning9363
    @redlightning9363 6 років тому +614

    At 2:57 Dan's wearing a box that says "don't talk to me" hint for his merch maybe?

    • @heyhriday
      @heyhriday 6 років тому +34

      It really was, woah

    • @WILL_DPW
      @WILL_DPW 6 років тому +16

      O_O but I want the box.

    • @Mattdasecondog
      @Mattdasecondog 4 місяці тому

      It’s actually he doesn’t wanna socialize since he said his socializing quote which he can’t socialize after

  • @MTLion3
    @MTLion3 7 років тому +918

    Tomska is one of the masters of sketch comedy - this was fucking great

    • @calum34
      @calum34 7 років тому +4

      It's more like sketchy comedy :)

    • @zxyde
      @zxyde 7 років тому +1

      The BlueDodo More like Squishy Squidgy Comedy

  • @honeyyhowell8769
    @honeyyhowell8769 7 років тому +2632

    "maybe you should stop socialising, everyone hates you" me at myself

    • @icyyloser1814
      @icyyloser1814 7 років тому +1

      Dan Howells gay ass nails u too?!

    • @taylorfran2135
      @taylorfran2135 7 років тому +4

      ur username gives me life btw

    • @eshapoddar7640
      @eshapoddar7640 7 років тому +3

      Dan Howells gay ass nails i dont know whats more relatable. Your comment or your handle

    • @renaciousd
      @renaciousd 7 років тому

      same

    • @Kikiguuurl
      @Kikiguuurl 7 років тому +1

      Dan Howells gay ass nails true

  • @BumbleBeeBoi
    @BumbleBeeBoi 4 роки тому +14

    3:23 he’s using the riotous bison, what a legend!

  • @sepiasmith5065
    @sepiasmith5065 6 років тому +1696

    my socializing quota same

    • @Kate-uj9rx
      @Kate-uj9rx 6 років тому +1

      Sepia Smith same btw I'm curious what is flag is that for

  • @CanadianDan854
    @CanadianDan854 7 років тому +901

    Danisnot...very good at saving the day.

    • @PoptropiCoffin
      @PoptropiCoffin 7 років тому +39

      Daniel HowdoIsavethedayIdontknowhowtodothishelpme

    • @lucy-yr5th
      @lucy-yr5th 7 років тому +12

      Actually its Dani Snot

  • @drawingfrenzy915
    @drawingfrenzy915 6 років тому +2455

    dan sounds like me when I'm trying to make someone feel better
    DAN: Everyone hates you.
    TOM: Everyone?
    DAN:Well, not everyone. Just the people who have met you and know that you exist.

    • @mayobomb1254
      @mayobomb1254 6 років тому +15

      Drawing Frenzy why is this me talking to myself in social situations

    • @PrimrosePetals
      @PrimrosePetals 5 років тому +9

      *Dan sounds like he's talking to me*

    • @areallybigannoyingorangefa6562
      @areallybigannoyingorangefa6562 5 років тому +2

      Drawing Frenzy so basically everyone

    • @datmemeyboi
      @datmemeyboi 5 років тому +2

      This sounds like me talking to myself

    • @crabmeat3803
      @crabmeat3803 5 років тому +1

      Drawing Frenzy you sound like a cynical asshole to be honest, mate.

  • @Enteringdullsville
    @Enteringdullsville 3 роки тому +20

    “Well, now that I’ve broken the ice...AHHHHH!”

  • @user-lj8zy8he1m
    @user-lj8zy8he1m 7 років тому +164

    "what was that?"
    "a bust"
    OKAY

  • @h4nn.h
    @h4nn.h 7 років тому +1077

    when you know it's fictional :
    anthony padildo gives dating advice

    • @faerieangeltaitai
      @faerieangeltaitai 7 років тому +1

      YOU RIGHT!! XDDDDDDDDDDDD

    • @Laggex_
      @Laggex_ 7 років тому +12

      hannah You like jazz?

    • @temimeow
      @temimeow 7 років тому +6

      hannah IM CRYING WHY IS THIS SO ACCURATE HELP

    • @sofiawells915
      @sofiawells915 7 років тому +1

      hannah 1k like 😊

  • @therealdezbruce
    @therealdezbruce 7 років тому +1624

    "I CAN SAVE THE DAY!"
    (has two guns)
    *THROWS GUN*
    This would be me.

  • @VoltageEnergi
    @VoltageEnergi 18 днів тому +1

    2:51 He foreshadowed the greatness to come!

  • @emelypalacios721
    @emelypalacios721 7 років тому +154

    DAN AT THE END IM-

  • @Plushnerd
    @Plushnerd 7 років тому +924

    so which type of clone is that dan?
    Social Advice Dan?

  • @zamin6060
    @zamin6060 7 років тому +415

    I love how the poster for the Zodiac Killer has a picture of Ted Cruz on it.

    • @abbidunn853
      @abbidunn853 7 років тому +101

      ted cruz is the zodiac killer

    • @IanScoines
      @IanScoines 7 років тому +9

      zubercharge this was the funniest joke of the whole sketch for me 😂

  • @Foxyct0
    @Foxyct0 3 роки тому +17

    Tom: * gets splashed with water *
    Also Tom: No! Mom come back!

  • @cesarvictoriano8072
    @cesarvictoriano8072 4 роки тому +1617

    “Where are my thumbs?!”
    “In the hole.”

    • @LukelayAlt
      @LukelayAlt 4 роки тому +36

      *Zooms in on hole and plays dramatic tone*

    • @ShadowSearcher31
      @ShadowSearcher31 3 роки тому +26

      “How did they get in the hole”
      “Through the orb”

    • @ourlordjubus
      @ourlordjubus 3 роки тому +13

      Where did the orb come from the hole

    • @dylansickinger545
      @dylansickinger545 3 роки тому +11

      *ominous music sting*

    • @FlamIsOnThePhone
      @FlamIsOnThePhone 3 роки тому +11

      *Insert Zooming into the hole* 🕳️

  • @just_a_bagel
    @just_a_bagel 7 років тому +819

    "Don't worry! I can save the day!"
    *Throws Gun*
    well it was worth a try XD

    • @eddiemate
      @eddiemate 6 років тому +2

      Zain Nasir
      He’s British, they don’t use guns.

    • @deltaphant_
      @deltaphant_ 6 років тому

      TAZ Dust

    • @monochaos9442
      @monochaos9442 6 років тому +3

      The only way to stop a bad guy with a gun is a good guy with a gun.
      ..... except when that good guy with a gun acts like a dumbass

    • @speedypainter52
      @speedypainter52 6 років тому

      Zain Nasir wow I read this right when that part came XD

  • @petewentzfrommychemicalrom3114
    @petewentzfrommychemicalrom3114 7 років тому +533

    Aye it's my boi padildo

  • @ajb4230
    @ajb4230 4 роки тому +21

    And this is true documentation why the bison needs a buff

  • @demoloversz
    @demoloversz 7 років тому +125

    "Ho, that's veeewy noice"- Daniel Howell's torso 2017

  • @sp00kyphand0m4
    @sp00kyphand0m4 7 років тому +1444

    Squishy 😂😂

  • @thememerboi6841
    @thememerboi6841 5 років тому +1184

    Alternative Title : A married gay man tries to gave a straight man a relationship advice

    • @virgilsanders2580
      @virgilsanders2580 4 роки тому +13

      Ok

    • @pissapocalypse
      @pissapocalypse 4 роки тому +12

      He's married?

    • @Jessica-bz1vm
      @Jessica-bz1vm 4 роки тому +56

      Maggatrix no, he’s not; ppl just think he’s basically married to Phil, even tho they might not even be together

    • @pissapocalypse
      @pissapocalypse 4 роки тому +19

      @@Jessica-bz1vm He said that they were more than friends in his coming out video

    • @Jessica-bz1vm
      @Jessica-bz1vm 4 роки тому +44

      Maggatrix yeah, but he never said they were still together. I’m also not saying they definitely aren’t dating, just that we can’t be certain

  • @fauxagency6333
    @fauxagency6333 4 місяці тому

    7 years and still gold. TomSka please start making that kind of videos AGAIN

  • @connysophie
    @connysophie 7 років тому +1708

    Dan giving socializing tips?
    What parallel universe is this??

    • @ellie_kempe
      @ellie_kempe 7 років тому +25

      And we can see how it ends...

    • @PaleNoFace
      @PaleNoFace 7 років тому +15

      What kind of AU is this ? Am I on the weird side of the Internet again ?

    • @getyourbounceon
      @getyourbounceon 7 років тому +11

      In a parallel universe where dan Howell is sociable

    • @tkerrd8999
      @tkerrd8999 7 років тому +21

      Internet support group live

    • @leonewashere
      @leonewashere 7 років тому +20

      I think he is confident and sensible he just doesn't enjoy socializing for long periods of time

  • @rubyhhh2715
    @rubyhhh2715 7 років тому +414

    "The lesson here is there are plenty of fish in the sea but some of those fish will die alone... Or get eaten by bears"
    *amazing advice Dan* 👏

    • @lilbitches3793
      @lilbitches3793 7 років тому +9

      coughs dans nickname is bear bish whats dan saying now

    • @KingOvFails
      @KingOvFails 7 років тому +1

      It could be a random quote,or he could be talking about bears eating salmon that swim upstream

  • @coolguy-cw7ng
    @coolguy-cw7ng 7 років тому +44

    “If looks could kill then...”
    *YOU MUST BE THE ZODIAC KILLER*
    *I’VE FOUND YOU*

  • @futuretruckdriver1010
    @futuretruckdriver1010 4 роки тому +45

    The weapon that the alien has looks like the bison from tf2

    • @BigDiff
      @BigDiff 4 роки тому +1

      it is the bison

    • @DivLikes2Doodle
      @DivLikes2Doodle 3 місяці тому

      The bison is a promo item for an irl sci fi prop called the bison, and that’s the irl prop

  • @Exxo3452
    @Exxo3452 6 років тому +1068

    Hey baby you work at MacDonalds?
    Because I'm lovin' it
    *MacDonald theme starts playing*

  • @macaroni6033
    @macaroni6033 5 років тому +4042

    Everyone’s talking about how Tom says “squishy” and “a gun” but has no one noticed that the alien is using the Righteous Bison?

  • @wateryourhouseplants3973
    @wateryourhouseplants3973 7 років тому +346

    "I can save the day!" *throws gun*
    NO DANIEL THAT IS NOT HOW YOU GUN

    • @kaperjuice
      @kaperjuice 6 років тому +29

      Water Your Houseplants when your British friend doesn’t know how to America

    • @SamanthaBryant
      @SamanthaBryant 6 років тому +13

      Water Your Houseplants only the baby knows how to gun.

    • @josiahklein70
      @josiahklein70 6 років тому +10

      I know, right.
      **holds gun with thumb on trigger and barrel toward face**
      _This_ is how you gun.

  • @kasioedits
    @kasioedits 2 роки тому +13

    2:11 "I like my women like I like my coffee"
    "oN mY PeNiS wOoOOaaAaAaHHhH"

  • @oppie9966
    @oppie9966 5 років тому +2918

    Bag of kids: *cries*
    Tom: *hits bag* StOp It

    • @mozxz
      @mozxz 4 роки тому +13

      and funny enough, if he had said that, Baby Yoda is in this bag , and hit it, people would have demanded him to commit seppuku, but normal babies ? That is Fine!

    • @breezyfan1012
      @breezyfan1012 4 роки тому +9

      @@mozxz I forgot about baby yoda and now the rember him I want to hug him

    • @garypeat3787
      @garypeat3787 4 роки тому +3

      breezy fan 101 baby groot is best change my mind

    • @L4mp15
      @L4mp15 4 роки тому +2

      600th like

    • @314rft
      @314rft 4 роки тому +4

      It's revenge against the baby with a gun.

  • @Harry101UK
    @Harry101UK 7 років тому +143

    Holy crap, the gags were on-point in this!

    • @visionedspoon2821
      @visionedspoon2821 7 років тому +6

      Harry101UK why do the best UA-camrs always come to tomska's videos?

    • @zealotwarrior9812
      @zealotwarrior9812 7 років тому

      Gasp it's Wheatley

    • @Team98
      @Team98 7 років тому +4

      Harry101UK "Suddenly, Wheatley!"

  • @RougeTheBatReal
    @RougeTheBatReal 7 років тому +415

    Tomska is a genius

  • @deletedchannel4477
    @deletedchannel4477 3 роки тому +10

    when you realise your sitting on the same chair as tomska had in 1:20

  • @BEEFlad
    @BEEFlad 6 років тому +2769

    "Are you free tonight? Cuz I don't have any money"
    *slaps*
    "I deserved that"
    Nice one dude😂😂😂

    • @465j9
      @465j9 6 років тому +7

      F me now is pretty gud

    • @Lilopad
      @Lilopad 6 років тому +12

      A YEAR LATER AND I FINALLY GET IT

    • @pawn5253
      @pawn5253 6 років тому +4

      This line is a grade A roast.

    • @korimckee2401
      @korimckee2401 6 років тому +3

      Feather took you nearly 2 years to get a prostitute joke? eh, can't blame you.

    • @ZombifiedBuizel
      @ZombifiedBuizel 6 років тому

      Lumine You are the Anti-Christ! Your likes are 666! We’re fucked!

  • @osiria391
    @osiria391 7 років тому +210

    *h I i ‘ M t O m*

  • @lilly1928374650
    @lilly1928374650 7 років тому +574

    *Dan* giving love advice
    *Me* Laughs hysterically, cries, rolls all over the floor

    • @mariadementeva2751
      @mariadementeva2751 7 років тому +30

      Louise Leech
      He met the love of his life at 18 and managed not to fuck things up for, what, eight yers now?
      Dude, I'd take ALL the love advice from Dan.

    • @lilly1928374650
      @lilly1928374650 7 років тому +9

      Мария Дементьева --- You are correct. *#Phan** confirmed*

    • @totallyhowell2778
      @totallyhowell2778 7 років тому +7

      You're making me feel things stop

    • @EmIdc
      @EmIdc 7 років тому +14

      I mean he's got the man of his dreams

  • @RoryRacingCarVrOoM
    @RoryRacingCarVrOoM 4 роки тому +136

    Dan : HOW DO YOU THINK SHE FEELS!?
    Him: shqueeshy
    Me : *W H E E Z E*

  • @kelseyrosemanuel9385
    @kelseyrosemanuel9385 7 років тому +2976

    What was that? A bust

    • @gabialas8008
      @gabialas8008 7 років тому +14

      KelseyRose Manuel hahahaha omg I get it now😂

    • @fyrentenimar
      @fyrentenimar 7 років тому +22

      So underrated.

    • @coinlockerbaby578
      @coinlockerbaby578 7 років тому +23

      KelseyRose Manuel Well, how do you think she feels?!

    • @teamusta1992
      @teamusta1992 7 років тому +10

      i fucking choked when i got it 😂😂😂

    • @rohanpatel3204
      @rohanpatel3204 7 років тому +1

      KelseyRose Manuel I don’t get it yet....

  • @samanthaann7353
    @samanthaann7353 6 років тому +589

    “Try try and try”
    “A gun?”
    Me: *dies of laughter*

  • @hippolover3924
    @hippolover3924 7 років тому +288

    Tom: You’re the Zodiac Killer.. I FOUND YOU!!!!!
    Lmao I’m dead.

    • @riley_6363
      @riley_6363 6 років тому +2

      Hippolover39 The Zodiac killer is actually Andrew Hussie

    • @riley_6363
      @riley_6363 6 років тому

      Matti cat ?

  • @DragouMC
    @DragouMC 3 роки тому +6

    “What was that?”
    “A bust”
    Tom is a genius

  • @manveercumo9019
    @manveercumo9019 7 років тому +142

    are you an alien?
    “cause your outta this world”
    me: HAHAHAHA

  • @anniefink5181
    @anniefink5181 6 років тому +235

    "Well that's my socializing quota for the month" SAME

  • @shadythot1765
    @shadythot1765 7 років тому +693

    I love this collab with Anthony

  • @capacraft2735
    @capacraft2735 8 місяців тому +2

    I love the captions

  • @valerie.monday
    @valerie.monday 6 років тому +523

    Dan: "If at first you dont succeed, try, try and try-"
    Tom: "A gun?"

    • @sapphiretheproto4958
      @sapphiretheproto4958 5 років тому +1

      Yep that’s what I do

    • @blumby1789
      @blumby1789 5 років тому

      That's me

    • @ImNeverProfit7517
      @ImNeverProfit7517 3 роки тому +2

      "How about two guns?"
      "NO!"
      "Three guns?"
      "HOW ARE YOU GETTING THIES."
      "Hehe, I don't know" (as he keeps pulling out more and more guns.
      they both start screaming as the room slowly fills with guns.

    • @frankywu8291
      @frankywu8291 3 роки тому +2

      @@ImNeverProfit7517 god I wish this happened

    • @ImNeverProfit7517
      @ImNeverProfit7517 3 роки тому

      @@frankywu8291 lol

  • @-adoriquex-5863
    @-adoriquex-5863 6 років тому +191

    Danyul is clearly the best wing man

    • @mikejones6162
      @mikejones6162 5 років тому

      danyul? XD Daniel, it even says in the title of the video

    • @4n3m01a
      @4n3m01a 5 років тому

      Mike Jones joke. it’s a joke.

    • @4n3m01a
      @4n3m01a 5 років тому

      Do you wanna start a cult with me? it’s a joke.

  • @toastedvibrant3450
    @toastedvibrant3450 5 років тому +987

    Hey, if looks could kill then
    you must be the zodiac killer
    *I'VE FOUND YOU!*

  • @CZMC671
    @CZMC671 Рік тому +1

    TomSka has some seriously funny humor. I keep rewatching on times I need a pick-me-up. Thanks TomSka! Keep being funny!

  • @jameshart6502
    @jameshart6502 7 років тому +263

    this is a perfect representation of my dating attempts XD

  • @renblauch9150
    @renblauch9150 6 років тому +1344

    Always bring guns to house parties...

    • @marissa1138
      @marissa1138 6 років тому +16

      #JustAmericanThings

    • @arizmack6341
      @arizmack6341 6 років тому +4

      +Marissa S | They’re in the UK tho

    • @raspberrycrowns9494
      @raspberrycrowns9494 6 років тому +9

      Who doesn't bring a gun to a party
      Are you mad

    • @emonightmare385
      @emonightmare385 6 років тому +4

      The Insecure Potato
      EVEN IF IT'S ILLEGAL! *cocks gun ;)*
      MATE, DO YOU EVEN KNOW HOW TA EAT VEGIMITE???

    • @barracuda0405
      @barracuda0405 6 років тому +3

      And schools!

  • @odeliahandy7991
    @odeliahandy7991 7 років тому +490

    The only reason I know it's Anthony is because Dan wouldn't give social advice bc otherwise I couldn't tell.

    • @floatii5169
      @floatii5169 7 років тому +11

      Odelia Handy oh stahp

  • @thechosenjuan8776
    @thechosenjuan8776 5 років тому +567

    3:04
    The righteous Bison before it got nerfed into the ground.
    Maybe 2 people will get that but that’s enough.

    • @jadeite2723
      @jadeite2723 5 років тому +15

      The chosen Juan willbe missed hopefully it gets buffed or at the very least revert the meet ur match update

    • @thechosenjuan8776
      @thechosenjuan8776 5 років тому +13

      UrNotKisper The worst thing is that valve thinks they already fixed the bison by sloppily trying to bring back the old stats!

    • @williamszy2827
      @williamszy2827 5 років тому +5

      Theres a dew noticeable things about it now it has worse stats then mac-10, although bigger rounds and more ammo, is also more expensive

    • @xord1946
      @xord1946 5 років тому +1

      I mean I don't even play it but I guess this is a reference to street fighter where Bison is a rather big character and he got nerfed by a lot?

    • @thechosenjuan8776
      @thechosenjuan8776 5 років тому +4

      Xord Nope, but I’ll give you a hint.
      The word “righteous”.
      (Edit: wtf I’m dumb I already said that in my original comment)

  • @kelseyrosemanuel9385
    @kelseyrosemanuel9385 7 років тому +1493

    You took advice from Daniel. Of course you couldn't get the girl

    • @fauxpod
      @fauxpod 7 років тому +90

      KelseyRose Manuel I'm sure he could find a guy though😂 (plz don't crush me internet, I know that dan doesn't have a label and he finds both guys and girls attractive please don't sue me or kill me)

    • @Alex-xq2qw
      @Alex-xq2qw 7 років тому +34

      Kayla Novas that disclaimer made the comment 😂

    • @user-idgaf123
      @user-idgaf123 7 років тому +21

      Anthony not Daniel...

    • @geneva1895
      @geneva1895 7 років тому +5

      KelseyRose Manuel fjjsjfkdhfkkdjmkrjf

    • @fauxpod
      @fauxpod 7 років тому +19

      Alex Hopkin-Spratt ik all comments need disclaimers bc demon phannies will murder you😂 but yea 😂

  • @kylieb2479
    @kylieb2479 7 років тому +570

    3:35 Leaked footage of Dalien being made

    • @jinniejoonie9604
      @jinniejoonie9604 7 років тому +44

      Kylie Burritt *wheezing*

    • @gabzzz8310
      @gabzzz8310 7 років тому +9

      Kylie Burritt Im screaming

    • @alyssaisnotonfire8556
      @alyssaisnotonfire8556 7 років тому +3

      Kylie Burritt HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA

    • @harmy1232
      @harmy1232 7 років тому +1

      OH GOD

    • @minysho1
      @minysho1 7 років тому +6

      THE LEVEL OF AWKWARD IT MUST'VE BEEN FILMING THAT THOUGH AHA