I left the Mormon church almost 5 years ago. I've been deeply enjoying this podcast. I think it's worth mentioning in this conversation that many ex-mormons have had multiple shelf-breaking moments. I made a conscious effort to repair my shelf many times before leaving. In some cases, it was a sunken cost fallacy where the thought of giving up on something I had devoted my entire life to was itself too much to bear. In other cases, I tried to repair my shelf for the sake of my relationships; I didn't want to lose my community. There were also times when I stayed for the sake of being an advocate for positive change within the church's membership. Little did I know that this would be met with enormous blowback and calls to repentance. The last straw, however, came when I was studying cult behavior in graduate school and I realized that I had been brainwashed in the MTC. My shelf broke for the last time.
I remember hard-core struggling with depression and my shelf items when the musket fire talk came out and considering I was a Holland girly and queer as hell, I was devastated and it definitely was one of those talks where I remember actively tuning it out bc it was triggering the memory of trying to come out at church 😢 ohhhh goodness. I can even remember where I was sitting in the room when this talk was put on, I know the lights were off and I remember what I wore. Ugh. Ugh. Bless yall for having these convos. I don't have folks to vent to that get it other than on the internet and these are soooo cathartic
I’m so sorry for any pain the church has caused you. You are not damaged. You are not broken. You are beautiful and amazing and perfect just the way you are! Now we get to go forward living more fully in love! ❤❤❤
Understood! My BYU Bishop, whom I had never talked to, called me out anonymously in Sacrament over the pulpit for saying a BYU boy (not in our ward), who was pestering me for months & I was still kind to, yet no other BYU girl would give the time to, was a 'worm'. The kid had literally 'wormed' his way into my life, my friend said & he claimed he had a dream that we should marry!! WTH??! The term was used in conversation, someone eavesdropped on, & was NOT said by me, but by another. SERIOUSLY?! So MUCH Male Priesthood GOSSIP! HOW IMMATURE! This Bishop didn't come to me first! WHAT an INFANTILE Priesthood BABY!! Bugger off, BISHOP!!
Literally that comment about how the baby steps sometimes backfire is SO accurate. The changes to the FSY was weirdly what broke my shelf. I was like all that for what??? Made me so angry.
Never Mormon here, but I’m a non denominational Christian. I think seeing the similarities and parallel between even ND Christianity and Mormonism in terms of toxicity of organized religion has been really clarifying. I feel like I’ve gained a lens to question the person so is preaching to me and the intention of their words versus blindly accepting it as fact
Members of Heavens Gate recorded video testimonials before they did what they did. Listening to them, you could have put them in a testimony meeting and they would fit right in. Testimony DOES NOT equal truth!!
Convicted Mormon Wife & Mistress Kids Murderer- RM/ BYU Grad/Temple married/ Priesthood holder Chad Daybell's patriarchal blessings played in his court case were SO Mormonish CRINGY!!
My shelf breaker: Going on a date with a man and instead of feeling immense guilt, feeling a profound peace come over me as my shame of being gay left me. Then being told that my peace came from the devil and realizing the church had been controlling personal revelation the whole time.
A non Mormon context thats more therapy based is the concept of a container that can hold everything worked on in therapy or heavy emotional content that you put someplace like a box, container, or shelf, but the intent behind it is to have a place to put it for now until you can work on it later.
I was definitely a Holland girly, my first GC was the one where he went off about the fishermen and casting nets and "do you LOVE me???" Lmaoooo. Also the moms LOVED uchtdorf like they'd go off about how hot he was lol what
Was disappointed when Uchtdorf compared seerstone to modern day highly technological cell phone. WTH?! Bruce R McConkie's Iconic Mormon Doctrine book states under 'Peep Stones'- that 'the devil gives his own revelations to some of his followers through peep stones or crystal balls.' NO JOKE. That statement didn't age well, at all!
I left the Mormon church almost 5 years ago. I've been deeply enjoying this podcast.
I think it's worth mentioning in this conversation that many ex-mormons have had multiple shelf-breaking moments. I made a conscious effort to repair my shelf many times before leaving. In some cases, it was a sunken cost fallacy where the thought of giving up on something I had devoted my entire life to was itself too much to bear. In other cases, I tried to repair my shelf for the sake of my relationships; I didn't want to lose my community. There were also times when I stayed for the sake of being an advocate for positive change within the church's membership. Little did I know that this would be met with enormous blowback and calls to repentance. The last straw, however, came when I was studying cult behavior in graduate school and I realized that I had been brainwashed in the MTC. My shelf broke for the last time.
YES! CULT 'BITE MODEL' traits Fit Mormon Cult 90%. Google it.
The musket fire talk was my shelf breaker as well!
Gurl, your voice is the one I've been looking for!
"Men like that made me feel small." I feel that! 💜
I remember hard-core struggling with depression and my shelf items when the musket fire talk came out and considering I was a Holland girly and queer as hell, I was devastated and it definitely was one of those talks where I remember actively tuning it out bc it was triggering the memory of trying to come out at church 😢 ohhhh goodness. I can even remember where I was sitting in the room when this talk was put on, I know the lights were off and I remember what I wore. Ugh. Ugh.
Bless yall for having these convos. I don't have folks to vent to that get it other than on the internet and these are soooo cathartic
I’m so sorry for any pain the church has caused you. You are not damaged. You are not broken. You are beautiful and amazing and perfect just the way you are! Now we get to go forward living more fully in love! ❤❤❤
Bishop's interviews at BYU were the last straw for me. I wanted to be left alone.
Understood! My BYU Bishop, whom I had never talked to, called me out anonymously in Sacrament over the pulpit for saying a BYU boy (not in our ward), who was pestering me for months & I was still kind to, yet no other BYU girl would give the time to, was a 'worm'. The kid had literally 'wormed' his way into my life, my friend said & he claimed he had a dream that we should marry!! WTH??! The term was used in conversation, someone eavesdropped on, & was NOT said by me, but by another. SERIOUSLY?! So MUCH Male Priesthood GOSSIP! HOW IMMATURE! This Bishop didn't come to me first! WHAT an INFANTILE Priesthood BABY!! Bugger off, BISHOP!!
Yeah more Zelph collabs!
Literally that comment about how the baby steps sometimes backfire is SO accurate. The changes to the FSY was weirdly what broke my shelf. I was like all that for what??? Made me so angry.
Never Mormon here, but I’m a non denominational Christian. I think seeing the similarities and parallel between even ND Christianity and Mormonism in terms of toxicity of organized religion has been really clarifying. I feel like I’ve gained a lens to question the person so is preaching to me and the intention of their words versus blindly accepting it as fact
❤❤❤ loved watching this
19:32 i need a comedy series based off joseph smiths life and the founding of mormonism. it would be so goddamn golden
Love South Park & BoM play songs for that!! Ie- BoM 'You & Me' but mostly ME' song lyrics! Narcissistically HILARIOUS!!
Members of Heavens Gate recorded video testimonials before they did what they did. Listening to them, you could have put them in a testimony meeting and they would fit right in. Testimony DOES NOT equal truth!!
Convicted Mormon Wife & Mistress Kids Murderer- RM/ BYU Grad/Temple married/ Priesthood holder Chad Daybell's patriarchal blessings played in his court case were SO Mormonish CRINGY!!
LOVE IT!! "Evaluate" your thoughts! Let them Flow & let them GO! Especially repetitive CULT Indoctrination!!
Ahhh!!!! My 2 fav exmo content creators!!!!❤
im actually quite ok putting algebra on the shelf and assuming its a sin to ever think about it again 😂
My shelf breaker: Going on a date with a man and instead of feeling immense guilt, feeling a profound peace come over me as my shame of being gay left me. Then being told that my peace came from the devil and realizing the church had been controlling personal revelation the whole time.
A non Mormon context thats more therapy based is the concept of a container that can hold everything worked on in therapy or heavy emotional content that you put someplace like a box, container, or shelf, but the intent behind it is to have a place to put it for now until you can work on it later.
Jesse Plemons should 100% play Joseph Smith in a historical dramatic docu-series. I would watch that hard.
omg haha what if joseph smith had hated algebra and put that in the doctrine and covenants? wouldve been absolutely fantastic
Then I would have considered joining in highschool. Sorry I can’t do algebra, it’s against my religion.😂
I was definitely a Holland girly, my first GC was the one where he went off about the fishermen and casting nets and "do you LOVE me???" Lmaoooo. Also the moms LOVED uchtdorf like they'd go off about how hot he was lol what
Was disappointed when Uchtdorf compared seerstone to modern day highly technological cell phone. WTH?! Bruce R McConkie's Iconic Mormon Doctrine book states under 'Peep Stones'- that 'the devil gives his own revelations to some of his followers through peep stones or crystal balls.' NO JOKE. That statement didn't age well, at all!
youre now required to listen to the musket talk to attend byu
What do we think of Tom Ellis as the Joseph smith 😆
When is that guy going to come out? 😂😂😂