Do narcissists care WHAT YOU THINK?
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- Опубліковано 24 вер 2024
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DISCLAIMER: THIS INFORMATION IS FOR EDUCATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY AND IS NOT INTENDED TO BE A SUBSTITUTE FOR CLINICAL CARE. PLEASE CONSULT A HEALTH CARE PROVIDER FOR GUIDANCE SPECIFIC TO YOUR CASE. THIS VIDEO DISCUSSES NARCISSISM IN GENERAL.
THE VIDEO DOES NOT REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON, AND SHOULD NOT BE USED TO REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON, AS HAVING NARCISSISM. PERMISSION IS NOT GRANTED TO LINK TO OR REPOST THIS VIDEO, ESPECIALLY TO SUPPORT AN ALLEGATION THAT THE MAKERS OF THIS VIDEO BELIEVE, OR SUPPORT A CLAIM, THAT A SPECIFIC PERSON IS A NARCISSIST. THAT WOULD BE AN UNAUTHORIZED MISUSE OF THE VIDEO AND THE INFORMATION FEATURED IN IT.
They pretend to care about what you think, but betray you when you least expect. You're left astonished.
So true 💯🎯
In that case what are the things to do?
@@user-wm5jc3vl1y be independent and indifferent
@@user-wm5jc3vl1y Leave, as soon as you can. It only ends badly. You deserve people that you can trust that won't turn around and discard/betray you for their own sick motivations
@LiamLiminal what are the things who pushed you to believe what you write me ?
Does anyone else feel frightened or nervous to be around other people after coming out of a narcissistic relationship?
Yes. I've sprnt years in isolation after being slandered and had my character completely defamed by a narcissistic. And in spite of a judge's order not to.
Oh YES! I was social but became recluse!
@@patriciaberliner8050 Keep strong. I'm trying to build myself a little each day. Working on shedded nerves. One day at a time. One day there will be an after that will matter. Keep holding on for that day. I feel for your situation. Wishing you the best🙌🙌🙏
@@LoveBeliefTruth Yes I was enjoying my life at the time my narc turned up.
I no longer trust my own judgement in so many areas. I feel like a complete, utter, idiot.
Q: How can you tell when a narcissist is lying?
A: Their mouth is open and words are coming out
YES! Thank you for your clever comment. So true, and you made me laugh. 😂
If their lips are moving, they’re lying.
They only ‘care’ because of how it reflects on them, not genuine care for the other person or relationship.
Yes they deeply care. The gaslighting, manipulations, twisting words, arguing, immature inflammatory gossip, etc shows they’re willing to put in the work and be several steps ahead of the next person. They want the best and to be the best all the time. They want ultimate attention and control. They feel destroyed and thus feel they must destroy others.
There it is... in a nutshell. Thanks!
AND there’s the stone walling.
They care what you think of them they just don’t care how you feel.
Well-said 💯
So true, you just pointed out a very good distinction. 👍
FACTS! 🎯🎯🎯🎯🎯
Exactly. 💯 🎯
THIS!!!!
I'm getting to the point where I actually don't care what the narcissist in my life thinks
Narcissists are obsessed with what other people think about them, even the ones they don't care about. I know, I grew up with one. That's one reason why their victims and discards are also their enemies. Narcissists know that they exposed their true self to them, and can't handle them knowing the truth about them.
They don't really care about anybody. That's the hard truth. Narcissists have no special person, only themselves.
My dearly evil mum & 85 healthy
Your last sentence speaks volumes. And when you ignore them or don't engage with them you can see the "I'll get you for this!" in their eyes. Expect them to get back at you by a smear campaign, which hurts, but deep down they know that you have them all figured out as the phony they really are.
This is interesting, I think the bit about discards being enemies rings true. The really damaging thing IMO about that is that they can still be in your life with a view to damaging you further, because you don't know that they've discarded you.
My narcissist met another one, and I'm currently getting attacked by both of them.
They insist on their twisted truth. They are the center of the world for them. They are always the victim in their mind.
Yes. They are fine as long as you think and believe as they do. How dare you not agree with them???
I think this sometimes can make them easy to manipulate too. Only in the sense it's easy to blow smoke up their ass and placate them before immediately packing your things and leaving FOREVER.
The problem with my father has been and still is, I should agree with him with that I should kill myself and die.
Now, who can agree with that? That is extreme mental, emotional and psychological abuse.
So true
So true
They gaslight you in thinking they don't care but they do.
Narcissists are obsessed with what you think about them. Remember, it's all about their fake image they create in the world?! What scares them is the idea of you not thinking about them at all.
Yup, when you don’t care they become obsessed ….
Dealing with this right now.
If they cared they wouldn't do what they do.
As the scapegoat who's in the healing process i was fighting with my family and to defend myself i said : i absolutely don't care anymore about y'all, I don't care if we'll ever talk again ", while i genuinely still do care because I'll be alone without them/loved them, while all i heard is my parents saying most of my life that they care while literally abandoning me and abusing me, also narcissists do care but only about their reputation or when u critisize/leave them.
Dr. Ramani can give you tools to deal with narcissistic people, Danish Bashir can offer more insights into recovery after a complete no contact. I commend your bravery and suggest you remain no contact. People don't change.
@@bewarefalsenonprofits thank you 😊 i already am watching so many of their videos lately, yeah i should stop arguing and explaining myself because I'm the one losing here😭
I have used that same phrase toward my family who scapegoats me.... am I a narc for using that phrase?
@@BrentB1961 i shouldn't diagnose you off of a youtube comment because I'm not a therapist nor i know you, but what i heard so far is that if you're truly truly a scapegoat you can't be a narcissist but u still can have many toxic traits as any other human being, it really depends on you and how u act and your intentions,also true narcissists never question their narcissism,they usually don't even label themselves as that, only very few who are aware of the situation and are willing to change ( also pretty rare)
Exactly 💯
They care so much. Even just seeing on your face that you are noticing their behavior, no matter how neutrally, sends them into a spiral.
I agree. They are constantly monitoring your reactions to them. I find they also constantly monitor you for flaws, which is driven by their competitiveness and envy. They just really suck. And there are so many😣
I used to not care what other people thought. Now I know what they think determines what they do, and what they do can be monstrous.
Agreed.
Exactly
Thank you.
Indeed well put 👏 Actions will tell you the truth.
True
They care what you think of them, but they don't care about you. 😮 For them, it's not how you feel, it's how they look. They protect their false self anyway.
They don't care about how people feel but they sure as hell do care about what people think .
Their reputation is what’s most important to them. As soon as you don’t believe in or support that image you will be fought or discarded.
🤣🤣😭 *I would laugh with glee as a teenager when my covert narcissistic mother would state "she doesn't care" what family/friends/associates think of her. It would make her so angry. At that point, I had radical acceptance and had outed her secretly to some family, friends and associates with empirical evidence (AUDIO) of her emotional abuse, lies and deception. She even made herself look even more foolish when she falsely accused me of something with her enabler and it came back to haunt her LEGALLY. No contact in over a decade. Two years of therapy in college and reading books about narcissism since I was 12/13. I wear the badge of SCAPEGOAT and TRUTH TELLER with pride.* 💞💞
You have the gift of discernment. Use it to do good. I'm so happy you were able to survive.
My mother would say "Nobody can hurt me" and accuse everbody else of being thin skinned. In fact she was the most fragile despite how her behaviour appeared.
I can relate!
Yes. Because I call them out she always says I’m thin skinned. My mom thinks everything makes me mad. Oddly enough I’m not like that with other people. My mom and my brother try to portray me as thinned skin and always tell everybody they don’t know how I get along with anybody. It’s quite the opposite. I get along with most people , except them. So frustrating.
@@lisabowden402 💯 I get along with most people too but as far as my mother couldn't be agreeable enough or tough enough. An unwinnable paradox. Remember you are the normal one and feeling is good. You're not thinned. You've had to develop a skin thicker than most just to survive.
@@mday3821 Keep being strong 👍
Narcs are fragile!!
Ive learned to be sweet and adorable with narcissistic customers. Then I tell them about how they just make my day excellent and what a blessing they are...it disarms them they dont know what to say. 🤣
No. Mom only listened to me when she wanted an excuse for an argument. Most of what I said would go in one ear and out the other.
One of the narcs I know cares deeply what other people think from the neighbors next door to the grocery clerk...she thinks the whole world is looking at and judging her when she is the one doing the judging.
You're so right! They're so paranoid that everyone is judging them, but in fact THEY are the ones who judge everyone else so critically.
They do care (a lot) because they care about their image.
Do you care what they think is better question.
They care about what you think. But they don´t care about how you feel because they don´t have emotional empathy. What they care about the most is their image. So if you figure them out they run like leopards because they are afraid that you tell people who they really are.
They only care about their self
They only pretended to care because they cared more about what other people thought.
They care about their reputation.
Ahahahaha no! I'm gonna tell you that now. Once they've lured you and made you follow everything that they say, you're a slave to them. But once you retaliate, then that's when they care about what you'll say.
They care. I have recently moved to another dept at work as I didn’t want to work with a narcissistic manager anymore. Now she is trying to organise a meeting with me to “clear the air”. I’m not interested, I have disengaged and moved on. I will never again agree to a one on one meeting with her.
💪 I hope things are going well.
@@cassiebennet4262 thank you. Amazingly, she was let go. It’s like a different workplace now.
I feel frustrated with my parents sometimes as when they express their form of ‘care’ it feels fake like it’s only really to make sure they look good. They only care how they look and how it reflects on them. As long as I make them look good, they ‘care’. If I’m really down and struggling their care is very limited, cold and full of judgment and criticism. 🥶 I’ve stopped trying to explain or ask for genuine care. I learnt a long time ago to take care of myself. Thank you Dr Ramani ❤
He would always call me a know-it- all or tell me i was being negative when I'd tell him what I thought ( which of course I said in the least antagonistic way possible) and my favorite one was, " Oh now I suppose you're an expert on _____!!! "
Narcissist, do not care what anybody thinks. They will exploit anyone no matter what. They don’t care if you’re flapping in the wind, they don’t care if you’re in the bathroom or if they expose you in the bathroom.
As long as they make money off you, that’s all they care about
This was one of the great contradictions of my childhood: my narcissistic mother always ranted that she did not care what other people thought. Meanwhile, by her interaction with us, it was obvious that she cared greatly about what other people thought about her children.
Narcissists do not care what people think; you're just supposed to accept all their nasty ways and never question them.
If course they do! NOTTT!! They only care that you agree with them and their shenanigans. Otherwise; punishment is their revenge in some form or another.
So, them saying, "I don't care what other people thinks", is just their way of dodging accountability for their bad actions. My abusive mother once said to me when I first stood to her was, "I do not care what you think of me and the rest of this family", for being so mean to me. She recently contradicts what she said by crying and asking me, "Am I a bad mother? Other people keep saying I am abusive." I will not be surprised by that she is lashing out at other people, even when giving her constructive criticism to her. She has been doing this to me my whole life and refused to listen any advice other parents tried give her. She lied.
Proximal distancing and a high level of denial of accountability. Definitely a narcissist's storng suit! Alas, even their "caring" is unhealthy.
He has me rereading our previous texts because I intetpreted his texts wrong. I said, "Okay, but why are you gaslighting me?"
I don't know ... let's rewind the past 20 years of world history and see.
Dr Ramani you will never know how much you have helped me. I listen to you everyday and i have learned so much. I am at a stage that i dont know who i really am i must say i am struggeling. This channel has opened my eyes so much. I just want to say thank you. Greetings from South-africa
❤
What still completely blows me away is their lack of reality. Unfortunately both myself and my dog were physically hurt from the smear campaign before I left. They still are delusional enough to think I'm coming back. They are free to think what they wish, but it still is very mind blowing. Thank you for your videos.
They absolutely do care what you think because they’re insecure, but they’re too shallow to care how you actually *feel.*
Dr Ramani, I love your purple color scheme lately. The color is a true embodiment of your personality. The purple is just something I noticed, because I love it too! Thank you for being a constant and enlightening healing resource over the years, you are awesome!
….and keep rocking the purple!!!!!
Very interesting, thanks for sharing your knowledge and wisdom about this!
As a scapegoat who has a sister that weaponized emotions years ago....I can honestly say this healing process has been more difficult than ever. It's not me. It's nothing I've done . It's all cultural expectation and my brother in law's side of the family. They've been analyzing me for years . I dod everything she and my brother in law asked..he used to call me a waste of space.im so over the manipulations . Just want my peace of mind back
My Mom's selective hearing can close off so fast a real persons head might spin...
But mum's own dearly evil head spins when i add one year to her age while pointing out how very Elderly she already is❤!
This is great! I'll try this with mine. It absolutely annoys me sometimes when my mom pretends to not hear me when she is literally sitting beside me.
I’d mention something about aging, loss of bladder control and the ssmmeellll……..and walk away.
Both my parents were narcissists. My mother was a perpetual little girl who never looked at or dealt with reality and my father was adeeply disturbed rage-aholic who demolished holidays and birthdays by bliwing up and making us all cry. He also raped me throughout my childhood, starting when I was a toddler. (Perhaps raping children was a habit he picked up in WWII South Pacific?)
I would follow my mother around begging for help, begging her to take me to a 'psyachrist" because something was so terribly wrong and I didn't understand what except I thought it was all my fault and that I was a terrible person. ( MY father used to sit me fown when I was a small child and ball me out because "I made my mother so unhappy and she was always sick because of me".
I have rarely spent a day of my life not wanting to kill myself.
At this time in my life when I look back at my wasted life of unaccomplishment and deep depression ( I was de
@@snownotwhite anytime you can on the spot mirror them.
When my NotHer says something crazy I hold her dazed look past her end word conclusion, Chuckle (for effect), then gleefully ask her, What I'm sorry, what the heck was it you just said? Mum is 85 & could backpeddle on a unicycle travel with the Carnivals.
@@keithstewart7514 This is so relatable. I stare at mine blankly and sometimes I ask her "why?" to her made up stories and complaints. These two things make her uncomfortable. I don't believe her stories, she knows I don't believe her stories, and she knows that I know. It's crazy and unwanted mind game but she loves it. But a waste of time and energy for me.
Reading this title I choked & spit my coffee out all over my laptop , AND shouted 'NO'!!
Good morning Dr. Ramani, I paused the video to answer your question. According to the implication to the structure of this video this seems to be based on, yes.
He absolutely wants me to believe he has all the answers, and he is golden. I couldn’t survive without him. In addition, he never lies. And he always 😉contributes everything.
He's even trying to appear as my hero during our separation, while simultaneously trying to stab me in the back. Good thing I have eyes in the back of my head!!
They want to control how you see them while ignoring that their behavior paints its own picture.
There's a domestic abuse channel with recordings of the husband berating the wife. One of things that struck me was when he said "Well don't think thaaaaat." They literally have to control what their scapegoat thinks and what untainted supply thinks of them at all times. What a miserable exhausting existence.
This really surprised me! I've always heard this and believed it. He seems to. He will stand up to others he doesn't agree with at work, regardless of the results. It seems anyway.
Why would they care more about co-workers than their own family members?
My narcissist specified that he didn't give a shit what his wife thought of him.
I hope she gets out.
I care what you think because I respect you and your work immensely. You are a tremendous resource for survivors. My detractors are giving my dysfunction more credit than it deserves. I'm neurotic and low in conscientiousness, but I'm not sociopathic, narcissistic or psychopathic. There's no calculating, scheming, gaslighting, love bombing, discarding, ect. Just me trying to keep it together with mindfulness, exercise, prayer and medication. My past two therapists told me I don't have NPD and that I am not high in narcissism. I've taken multiple variations of the NPI and have scored incredibly low. Either I'm completely delusional while simultaneously duping trained professionals, or I'm just a dysfunctional non-narcissist. Overall, I'm high in emotional empathy and very high in agreeableness. Sometimes too high. I've let addicts live with me for an entire year nearly rent free. I was under the impression it would be split 50-50, it ended up being 90-10 or 95-5. I should've parted ways sooner or not move in with them in the first place. I'm willing to get a brain scan to end this uncertainty once and for all, maybe just give myself peace of mind that I am not a narcissist or sociopath. With the exception of one person, it appears we all agree I'm not a psychopath as I'm clearly a neurotic ball of pure and unfettered anxiety.
Thank you, Dr
Taking your advice, and doing what you mention at the end, particularly save me from my narcissistic ex wife
I am still dealing with the remnants of abuse, but I am free
I can never thank you enough
Appreciate you reading the comments Dr ❤️
A Narcissist does not have what it takes to be 'humane' in any sense of the word. Not unless it benefits them. And if it doesn't, then their actions betray that truth to us. 🍒
I could write a book! I gained control of my sisters money, her very life after her narcissistic daughter took $800,000 over her adult years beginning in about 20 years of age. When the court gave me control I immediately cut off everything. There's nothing you can name that my sister and her husband were not paying. Susan called me up and asked, "who is going to pay MY rent?" She did not ask who was gonna feed her two children and pay their medical expenses. I asked, , "who signed the lease," to which she said she did. I said "Susan, you are so smart you have answered your own question." She then said something about me and "sunny beach," and proceed to hang up. She was really angry when her car was repossessed and later on her mother's car was taken away from her. She moved back into her mother's house, after I put her mother in an assisted-living home, and Susan is being evicted even as I speak. I will eventually sell the house and with me being in control of her mother and her late father's money, it is driving her crazy! My wife told me, "Ron, I've never seen you happier after spending $40,000. 😂
When you truly don't care you don't acknowledge the BS. You keep it moving. Acknowledgement shows you care.
YOU
never care
What I think!
They care how they are perceived by everyone else, if you tell the truth you become public enemy number one.
Dr. Ramani, I want to thank you for all your online advice. A sibling of mine died last week who I feel had been turned against me several years ago. I had broke all contact with all my other siblings around that time. I didn’t attend my brother’s funeral but my eldest son did, which hurt a lot. Your videos have this week helped me with the pain, self doubt and hurt I have experienced. They have been invaluable in helping me cope. Thank you so so much.
They break down and cry but they can't stop their screaming behavior
They care that you think they're awesome. Literally nothing else you think matters to them.
On the bright side, they never really recover when you tell them what you really think ☺️
I like that part.
Thank you ! You are helping so many people. I have a number of narcissists my life, and my life has been challenging! ❤
They care about what reflection they get from others. They might try to break the mirror if they don't like what they see.
Thank you Dr Ramanyi. You have clued me in , albeit later in my life . would you consider doing a segment on human behaviour which is ofen generational and passed down ? Thank you .
Mine totally cares what others think of him. That is why he is so good at “hiding” his abuse of me. His “public” persona is that of a caring, fun-loving guy. However his “private persona” at home and to his immediate family is abuse. My grown children who are now parents themselves and one is a grandparent, STILL suffer from the effects of his narcissism. Unfortunately for me, it has taken me, even after many years of various professional counselors, therapist, etc. of 48 years., I have finally learned why he has behaved the way he has and continues to behave. It has taken me 45 years! And it has only been a few months ago that I discovered Dr Ramani’s videos that I truly understand who I have been married to for almost a half century. Now I am trying to figure out what can I do now. I’m almost 70 years old.😢
I use to not care what people thought of me except for my parents. What they thought mattered to me. Now after NA, I care what everyone thinks of me. Now, I don't feel the freedom I once had . Ugh
He said this morning he doesn't care what I think. Because I interpreted HIS texts wrong.
Anytime I felt insecure growing up, my narc mom's response was just, "Who cares what other people think?" But let me tell you, she cared a LOT about what people thought of HER.
My experience is that they deeply care about what I think about them. That's it.
My ex narc used to tell me that he's never cared what people think about him in his life, but that he kinda cared what I think. I didn't understand the depths of what that meant until I figured out that he was a narcissist.
Right: they DO care. And need to be endlessly fed with attention. It's exhausting to supply them. And equally exhausting when you don't supply them and get punished for it. No way to win.
So my ex GF of almost a year started neglecting me, pushing away, starving me emotionally, ignoring my messages... She broke up with me because I was jealous of a guy she was leaving me for. She told me that I was causing drama and she doesn't like drama, that I was too much in love with her, that she decided she's actually straight (I am a girl too).
Then I met with her to get my things from her home and she was like "do you still like me?" "I don't want you to think bad about me" "I wish you all the best" "lets have some tea" "maybe sit on my lap?". I discarded her weird invitations for contact and I told her that after what she did to me I think only bad about her. Srsly what did she expect?
You are right Dr Ramani! I have often heard my narc say he doesn't care.... and when I say often - I mean all the time.
I think they are cowards and they don't or won't take responsibility for what they say
My ex mocked my family to my brother because everyone in it cares what others think. Meanwhile, my ex did not need to care what other people think because he has so many enablers. He doesn't care that the loan officer at the bank thinks his income is too low for the amount he wants to borrow ('they just don't understand'!) because he can always get someone else to co-sign for him.
That's what it's boiling down to: who has the most enablers? As long as they are enabled, they're not going to care what someone else thinks. And as long as anyone else doesn't have more enablers than they do, they're not going to care.😮😮😮
I just had this epiphany reading your post combined with yesterday's experience. Thank you.
Today I decided to not continue with my current therapist (of 2 months) anymore. She has been either passive-aggressive or just disrespectful to me whenever I shared or tried to share about my narc parents and abusive childhood. But I'm fed up of giving people closure, so, to this one, i won't inform her. I'll just be passive aggressive to her.
@@IntuitiveLovex True! And thank you.. It felt like I was being vulnerable in the presence of a narc (my therapist). I've stopped running the repeated conversation scenarios in my head and gaslighting myself for sharing my vulnerabilities since I stopped interacting with her. For a week now, I'm again going through Dr Ramani's videos on basics of identifying and dealing with Narcissists.
"It's not You" the Narcissist cares about...
"It's only themselves they care about".
This was so helpful. I noticed that no matter what I said, she never listened to me or even cared. I was wasting my energy and tears. I am a very emotional person, and I often tried to have deep conversations and understand her, but she would ignore me, and if she did respond, she would tell me incredibly hurtful things. I wish I had disengaged, and I never allowed her to humiliate me. I know now that she is getting off on me texting her trying to ask her why she won't calm down and just talk to me or ask her why she says she loves me but never shows it and why she tells me things like she is going out with another boy this evening but when she wants me back she will tell me she lied it's always a game with her, she is playing with my life and when I tell her I have to take medicine and see a doctor because of the emotional stress I am under, and I almost wanted to end my own life she didn't care she knows I lost my father recently, but it's all about her, it always has been she never reaches out and asks me if I am ok after a disagreement or a fight she tells me I deserve to be punished and if I treat her badly she will treat me 100 times worse but her version of someone treating her badly is pretty much her own deletion, and I am only human I make mistakes I am not perfect, but I give her everything I could emotionally financially, and she is just relentless its heartless. Thank you for all your wonderful videos, Doctor Ramani; they are life-changing.💜
After being no contact with my mother for 10 years and the ex husband since June 2017 I know that neither of them care about me. At all. Happy joyous and free from them both together with all their drama and issues and sh1t
Hey. Thanks & good job. I'm trying to use psychology to improve the quality of my life. Your videos are very informative. If my goal is authenticity, individuation & self actualization (internal validation) I fear falling into this trap (not caring what others think). If I actually achieve this does that mean I'm a narcissist? I have empathy. I care about others, but I try to not let others manipulate me by leveraging that empathy (playing the victim card). I'm trying to thread the needle between healthy relationships (authentic) & toxic (manipulative). Don't settle. We got this.
He was always saying that he didn't care how someone felt, or didn't like him, etc. A few times someone on Twitter blocked him and he says to me, "But why would she block me? What did I do? I don't understand why she would block me." (And this was some random person who didn't like his posts, told him so, then blocked him.). I said to him he was full of it and obviously he did care. Of course this angered him then yelling for a bit he doesn't care about anything. And so on, and so on, and so on, and so on... 🙄😵💫😄
i have noticed that the need to broadcast outwardly, "(look and see how much) I Don't Care What You Think Of Me" is actually their words undoing their own meaning.
Shockingly, overwhelmingly so. My 80M+ allies were complete strangers, just like my family.
I don’t think that they think about anything or anyone but themselves. ABSOLUTELY NO EMPATHY!
They care what people think : they need the validation and the narcissistic supply!
They're evils and it's all about them.They care only to have last say and wining by spending time and money, more than that, they don't care the damage they cause using even black arts, wich I had experience to get what they want to...
My mother was so mad at me whenever I expressed discomfort of people (hypothetically) thinking something about me. She would drill in my head that I should not care about people's opinions. But only when it was convenient to her. When it was not convenient, she would shout "what will people think about it!"🙄 like a week ago you were insisting that their opinions don't matter, now they suddenly do. Now as an adult I don't speak to her unless it is necessary.
*You don't get to show-up* with a narc. Everything you say will be invalidated or denied. It must be that way until you become a flying monkey -- or get discarded. Thank God it's over.
They have a black and white view. So nothing between. Either you are with them - then you are a doormate and a slave (you always say yes and are a people-pleaser) or you stand up for yourself and you will be discarded. (I got the last one and personally I think the best one).
Before I listen to this my first response is NO. They don't even hear or process what you say. They are the only ones in the room.
They don’t. They do project onto anyone and everything else. Do avoid any communication. I can’t breathe sometimes.
They care in more ways than one way.They are unpredictable. They like to boast.They have needs like everyone else.😊
Only if it impedes their personal ambitions.
Great video Dr Ramani ! My ex constantly said I don't care what people think of me those exact words, they get embedded in your brain like a chip, my question was on that to him is that the truth or his BS.
Narcissists are just great autosuggestion practitioners.
They'll repeat "I don't care what you think" and relentlessly come back at you with more arguments to try to sway your opinion or get you to yield. They'll repeat "I don't need you in my life" and come back again and again and again until YOU finally find it in yourself to kick them out of yours for good (and then they'll act as if the break-up was their call, obviously). Not that many of them are that good at achieving what they want on their own, but they know the strength of a good narrative and know a hoard of believers can coopt and create that reality for them. And they can't deal with the actual reality, so bending the truth until someone makes it what they want is the only way.
And I did hear a narc literally and plainly say they envied psychopaths and people who truly feel no remorse or fear in the first place, who don't have to ignore those feelings since there are practically none to ignore in the first place, so that's absolutely based too.
Can’t wait for your book. Preordered months ago!
You know what peeves them? When you say you don’t care and you’re 10 toes in it. It’s like they have nowhere to go after that. It’s comical. 😂
That's how villians and antagonists in most movies are portrayed these days......as being misunderstood.
In the context which the narcissist says 'I don't care what other people think about me' it would be a statement made to invalidate another person saying 'Why do you care so much about what other people think'. The narcissist is simply trying to invalidate you, compete with you and disagree with you for a reaction. Its a passive aggressive attack and comes from a place of envy or anger towards you.
Can’t wait to have your book and recommend it to my patients