I am in this situation....ive been living with my inlaws and i dont feel like im building myself rather im building them😢😢😢...May God give me strength to make the right decision
I always say the max days for visiting inlaws is 2days, especially if they are a very big family. Usually we women are mistreated & undermined. Inlaws are competitive, they always wanna show off how they can cook, how well they can clean, how long they can pray, how well they can treat your husband, etc.. You are stuck there feeling small and frustrated ... 🇿🇦
As someone who desires to be married one day, I have been taking mental notes from observing married couples and I completely agree with Benjamin. I have visited with relatives that lived with their in laws and I can tell y'all, THE STRIFE IS REAL!!! Couples, please have your own space!! In order to maintain respect between yourselves and relatives, boundaries and space are necessary. This is good advice💯❤️
I have seen it in my family. Nyanya has made it clear, kila mtu aiishi kwake. And when she got sick, a help was hired for her in her home, she only comes to Nairobi for doctors visits and doesn't stay for over a week. We need to care and protect our families and lives.
I support Benjamin 101% be in your on compound, I lived with in laws and the relationship ended in 3 months ,you find being fought north west east south and if your man isn't on your side surely you will suffer, and I swore never ever again
Same here, we are going for year number 3 of living with our in-laws. It sucks. My husband does not make enough to get us out of our situation and I am still studying. I have two years left of studying before I get my degree. It’s hard…really really hard. If I had known this would happen I would have never moved out of my parent’s house and sometimes I wish that I could move back in with my parents but I cannot. I am already married, the deed is done and dusted, I cannot go back in time.
💯 agree with Benjamin Zulu....I have experienced it where the mother-inlaw actually knows the inside out of the marriage than me,the wife and she tells the son how to run the marriage including me. Finally,I realized throughout the marriage,the male I have been married to cheated and a very sexualised predator. In other words,he had hidden life style I didn't know and uses Bible and church to cover evil deeds and after,12 years I ended the marriage and for me to realise that all these years I was treated an option and not priority! Thanks Joyce and Benjamin for highlighting on the matter.
People are forgetting that one day they would be a mother in law. The golden rule treat others the way you want to be treated. We are only hearing the negative stories but there are positive relationship too. People need to look for positive side and know their boundaries and show Godly love. Look for people who have good relationship so they can give you good advice. Do not listen to a voice that seems controlling. Some men are so controlling that the girl mother might be trying to advice the daughter and the man does not like that. Some men feel they can do a woman anything because the woman is vulnerable, afraid of him and do not know what to do. She would tell her mother one she can trust and the mother in law would talk to him but he would be upset. Ladies do not throw away your mom because the man do not want your mother there so she can see how he treats you at home. Take warning.
I like the first part of you comment. A lot of woman that like to criticise they mother in law always end up being worst than them in the future. There is always positive and negative things about the in laws. Like you said its more important to focus on the positive side. In law are very very very important. They help a lot. Always respect them.
Since the day i landed on this show 2 weeks ago, i got stuck and i have never been disappointed!! U guys r the best!!! I love laughing and learning with u!!! Watching and enjoying your shows from Rwanda🇷🇼🇷🇼🇷🇼🇷🇼🇷🇼
I live in a compound in Nairobi with 5 bro in laws and their families....its crazy...toxic. Manipulation,control issues,divide and rule,lies,insults etc I find it difficult to create a home where the man I submit to is not in control.
I get you. I've stayed for a month with a bro in law and it's draining. It's a bedsitter. No space, no boundary.And he's a dirty bro. Menn it's draining
Always respect your in laws and be wise. Zulu have wisdom but don't be foolish to agree with everything that he is saying because doesn't apply to everyone.
This is y some women come into the marriage battle ready, they create walls around them against the in laws even be4 they try it..... They r aware that one is not a joke.
All that Benjamin has said is common sense to me.My sentiments exactly💯.I have had this very discussion with people time and time again. Folks end up falling into traps of their own making because of putting sentiment where logic should take priority.
Thank you ,the bitter truth ... in-laws will mess you big deal especially those ladies who visits ,does no house cores in the name of niko my brother yangu😓😓
Waooooh Joyce n Benja this is lit leaving with in-law is the worst went to visit my in-laws for Christmas abroad lockdown ndiyo iyo 6months the same roof I feel tired she is monitoring me...but I thank God he is great
Zulu you have handled this topic in an excellent way Required: if parents are sick get them nurses In laws please stay away from other peoples marriage Yaani Zulu on this topic u have done an excellent job People pretend they want in laws around but tht is it
"Your woman needs to have her own territory. Women are very territorial." Distance creates peace. Benjamin Zulu
I am in this situation....ive been living with my inlaws and i dont feel like im building myself rather im building them😢😢😢...May God give me strength to make the right decision
Don’t make my home an assembly of your relatives 😂😂😂😂 that statement right there
Priceless 😅🤣
I learnt this the hardway and I realised I'm a grown up and I have a choice and that is to avoid contact!!
Honestly I just love Mr. Zulu,im so greatiful I accidentally found this channel. Thank you switch TV.
I always say the max days for visiting inlaws is 2days, especially if they are a very big family. Usually we women are mistreated & undermined. Inlaws are competitive, they always wanna show off how they can cook, how well they can clean, how long they can pray, how well they can treat your husband, etc.. You are stuck there feeling small and frustrated ... 🇿🇦
Exactly!
And men are so blind to any fault of their families
Me that will sit down and cross my leg if my mother in law wants to show off… I cannot be bothered at all..
Finally someone had to say it
I'm dying living with in laws im running away🏃♀️🏃♀️🏃♀️🏃♀️🏃♀️ can't take this anymore
As someone who desires to be married one day, I have been taking mental notes from observing married couples and I completely agree with Benjamin. I have visited with relatives that lived with their in laws and I can tell y'all, THE STRIFE IS REAL!!! Couples, please have your own space!! In order to maintain respect between yourselves and relatives, boundaries and space are necessary. This is good advice💯❤️
I agree 💯
I agree 💯
Marriage is only worth it if its advancing your life 🙌🏾
I have seen it in my family. Nyanya has made it clear, kila mtu aiishi kwake. And when she got sick, a help was hired for her in her home, she only comes to Nairobi for doctors visits and doesn't stay for over a week. We need to care and protect our families and lives.
I support Benjamin 101% be in your on compound, I lived with in laws and the relationship ended in 3 months ,you find being fought north west east south and if your man isn't on your side surely you will suffer, and I swore never ever again
Men!! Why make relationshop with a woman you can't support and cling to your relatives like your wife trespasser
I need to like this more than 3 times ooh Benjamin you always teach me a lot.
I wished I knew this before I got married. My mother in law is a living hell and living with her is like sleeping in fire/or in a very hot room.
I’m Indian and this is so helpful
PREACH. I am watching this while crying. I will live through this.🙏
Benjamin gets it again!You deliver the message with the passion it should be accorded.
Kudos to Joyce and Switch tv for such a valuable platform.👏🏾
Benjamin Zulu is the best you're a gift from God to counsel us as humans, thanks!
Thanks Joyce and Benjamin I'm watching from South Africa, I'm learning a lot may God bless you..
This guy I just love him lol lol. Joyce you are the best. Loving the show from Antigua in the Caribbean. Benjamin really knows his job.....love it
I wished I watched this before I got married.i have been living with the inlaws for 2 years now. I feel stuck Here
God will see you through
U not alone dear
Same here, we are going for year number 3 of living with our in-laws. It sucks. My husband does not make enough to get us out of our situation and I am still studying. I have two years left of studying before I get my degree. It’s hard…really really hard. If I had known this would happen I would have never moved out of my parent’s house and sometimes I wish that I could move back in with my parents but I cannot. I am already married, the deed is done and dusted, I cannot go back in time.
@@thegirlnextdoor4939same! I hope things get better for us
💯 agree with Benjamin Zulu....I have experienced it where the mother-inlaw actually knows the inside out of the marriage than me,the wife and she tells the son how to run the marriage including me. Finally,I realized throughout the marriage,the male I have been married to cheated and a very sexualised predator. In other words,he had hidden life style I didn't know and uses Bible and church to cover evil deeds and after,12 years I ended the marriage and for me to realise that all these years I was treated an option and not priority! Thanks Joyce and Benjamin for highlighting on the matter.
People are forgetting that one day they would be a mother in law. The golden rule treat others the way you want to be treated. We are only hearing the negative stories but there are positive relationship too. People need to look for positive side and know their boundaries and show Godly love. Look for people who have good relationship so they can give you good advice. Do not listen to a voice that seems controlling. Some men are so controlling that the girl mother might be trying to advice the daughter and the man does not like that. Some men feel they can do a woman anything because the woman is vulnerable, afraid of him and do not know what to do. She would tell her mother one she can trust and the mother in law would talk to him but he would be upset. Ladies do not throw away your mom because the man do not want your mother there so she can see how he treats you at home. Take warning.
I like the first part of you comment. A lot of woman that like to criticise they mother in law always end up being worst than them in the future. There is always positive and negative things about the in laws. Like you said its more important to focus on the positive side. In law are very very very important. They help a lot. Always respect them.
Same as Boys don’t throw your MIL as well
I needed this,,am going crazy in this house
Since the day i landed on this show 2 weeks ago, i got stuck and i have never been disappointed!! U guys r the best!!! I love laughing and learning with u!!! Watching and enjoying your shows from Rwanda🇷🇼🇷🇼🇷🇼🇷🇼🇷🇼
Am the first today, watching from jirani🇺🇬🇺🇬🇺🇬thanks for always advising and teaching us
Wow !! You both fantastic , I love this show can't afford to missed an episode 💕💕🙏🙏
I live in a compound in Nairobi with 5 bro in laws and their families....its crazy...toxic.
Manipulation,control issues,divide and rule,lies,insults etc
I find it difficult to create a home where the man I submit to is not in control.
Sorry
I get you. I've stayed for a month with a bro in law and it's draining. It's a bedsitter. No space, no boundary.And he's a dirty bro. Menn it's draining
I hv stayed 2 years i feel stressed weak and worthless but atleast im praying God to help me thro .....ill be moving in to my house this sartuday
@@carolinemghanga2891 congratulations ❤❤
Am learning a lot thru this show as am about to get married, it will help me alot
Always respect your in laws and be wise. Zulu have wisdom but don't be foolish to agree with everything that he is saying because doesn't apply to everyone.
Benjamin you are talking the truth.
THIS MAN IS EVERYTHINGGGGGGGGG
LOUDER &CLEAR SIR.GOOD TOPIC
I thought Mr Zulu is from South Africa, he is very funny to listen too.
I can imagine him preaching, the church would be flooded
Thank you Benjamin!!!
B. Zulu u are the epitome of class!!! this is the truth!! in law moms are hell
This is y some women come into the marriage battle ready, they create walls around them against the in laws even be4 they try it..... They r aware that one is not a joke.
Thanks for this, love from Zimbabwe.
This is soo real @Benjamin and joyce,thanks for the knowledge
I'm loving the conversation... Always a vibe with these two
Benjamin Zulu you got the bombs!!! So much wisdom
All that Benjamin has said is common sense to me.My sentiments exactly💯.I have had this very discussion with people time and time again.
Folks end up falling into traps of their own making because of putting sentiment where logic should take priority.
Thank you ,the bitter truth ... in-laws will mess you big deal especially those ladies who visits ,does no house cores in the name of niko my brother yangu😓😓
It's exhausting. Been living with one since she was in high school, finished college, graduated. Working, na bado ako tu. Chei! Ayam tired
Me right now..... Nitafukuzana soon
Wooi kumbe tuko wengi 😢😂
Thanks Benjamin n Joyce..
I laughed sooooooo many times watching this.
Spot on, learning a lot from this,👏👏👏👌👌👌.
This has got me laughing more than Joyce, thank you for the good job
Mothers in-law , need to be at a distance , especially the mother of the husband.
Even mothers of de wives
this is 200%, please don't live with their in laws. Or with your parents. I have done so on both sides and it doesn't work.
Thank you ! Best advice , don’t do it, enjoy your space..
Benjamin my former fitness trainer I'm proud of you 💯💯🙌🙌🙏🙏💪💪
Very true i support Zulu. Never ever live with in-laws
Thank you Benjamin
Woow....nice topic...learning
Benjamin and Joys hehe. I am laughing so hard my stomach hurts 😂😂😂😂😂😂. My house with our two pictures🤣🤣😂😂
I really like the topic learning a lot
I love Benjamin....just enlightened me
Amen Benjamin!!
Thanks a lot Benjamin and Joyce 😘 😘 😘 😘
This is soo amazing
This was so funny! But so true!!! Benjamin Zulu is all facts! 🙌🙌🙌
Benjamin......uko sawa I enjoy your shows
True dont be too much inlove,That you ignore Where his going to put you
True, arguing soap with in-law. Enough, indeed women want and need their space
Couples.
This advice is really good, I needed to hear this and will always remember this for life.
Thanks Benjamin for publicly airing out my sentiments
Benjamin is right space and bounderies are neccesary. This man is hilarious!!!🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
He is hilarious to watch,
Totally agree! Never works living together
Thank God i have found you here...❤❤❤❤❤❤
Men don't marry if you cannot carry your own weight,,,wuuuueh.I just love this man.🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Waooooh Joyce n Benja this is lit leaving with in-law is the worst went to visit my in-laws for Christmas abroad lockdown ndiyo iyo 6months the same roof I feel tired she is monitoring me...but I thank God he is great
Oh sorry too bad they are reading you as book they never bought and wondering how they came to be in possession of it. Come back soonest.
Zulu you have handled this topic in an excellent way
Required: if parents are sick get them nurses
In laws please stay away from other peoples marriage
Yaani Zulu on this topic u have done an excellent job
People pretend they want in laws around but tht is it
I don't think it's pretence. Its just acting nice coz you have no choice
waau thank you Benjamin
So interesting
Waaah Benjamin 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂atleast today 23 years hatujatajwa
True:)
🤣🤣🤣🤣 amewacha kuwachoma for just a second.
Leo ni leo 👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏very good
This one was a comedy on its own🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
I was having a bad day I can't stop laughing. He is hilarious
Wooow this is Great
Very true
eh..........in laws is for sure a thorny issue....Benjamin is not mincing words!
taking notes...
You look so smart
Respect demands distance.....
Under no circumstances should you live with your inlaws
This guy is funny😂😂🤣🤣
This is it
l agree with Benjamin will never repeat that mistake .distance matters
💓💓💓word .....men 👂👂👏👏👏
👏👏👏so right
You can fall but God will make you ride higher than before,Dissapointments happens We cant prevent them
Facts
Gosh Benjamin leo umekasirika kabisa! But I agree with yu 100%!
He is so animated!!!
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
He needs to come here to the Indian community and Preach all this....
I have lived with my in-laws before and I agree 100% that it is not a good idea.
you nail it Benjamin!!! You rock!!
Honorary wife...I'm dead Zulu 😂😂😂🙆♀️🙆♀️
Aki Benjamin Zulu...😂😂😂
Uuuuwiiii hii topic imenitouch sana ...staying with in laws nayo cpendiii bt my husband amependa familia yake sana ...sina sauti
Me too. Am tired
Do not import your mother in law 😂😂😂
Woooow 🤭
I rather take good example from my parents if they are good role model.
Please give more lessons for the already married couples.
Mi napenda tu