"So when you say 'We get it, you're gay', I can't help but think 'Yes. I am gay. But no. You don't get it.'" This is so powerful and I have goosebumps now. Thank you so much for this video.
People say, "you're gay we get it" when a person that is in an online chat or so only talks about them being gay,its annoying and its not a personality
My school blocked your channel. I'm disappointed and angry because your videos are so educational and important, but I'm not surprised because I live in an area where I got yelled at by a teacher for telling my friend that I'm gay (not as a joke, in a serious manner) and where another queer kid was laughed at by classmates in the middle of a basketball game, so he left the gym and got three days in detention while the bullies were let free. It sucks, because in the middle of the day where I get ignored by a majority of my classmates for being the gay kid, I just want something to have that makes me feel normal, and your videos help, but I can't because every video that mentions someone who isn't straight is blocked.
It's actually illegal for schools in america to censor/filter queer specific content, unless it's explicitly inappropriate (meaning it contains sex or something). You could technically sue them for that, and for the bullying/discrimination. That's quite literally all illegal
That feeling when being bisexual. Dated a man for 11 months, family started regarding me as if I had just stepped off of a flying saucer. Eventually we break up. Get a girlfriend. "Yeah, he was gay, but he's cured." *puts imaginary gun to my head, pulls imaginary trigger*
I know a girl where something similar happened, she sat her family down and talked to them about Pansexuality, and they understood after that, and accepted her.
started the year with a boyfriend. now have a girlfriend, grandfather now hates me despite LOVING his gay brother in law because he doesn't understand bisexuality. I never thought any of this would be an issue. the thing is, he loves my girlfriend, he just doesn't like me for having one!
+NoiseMarines I get them feels, bro. Gender means zilch to me, but I've dated more women than men, so when I married my husband, everyone seems to think I was "cured" as well. Seriously, guys? Seriously?
I have never said 'We get it you're gay.' Not in words or text - but I may have thought it & for that I apologise. Sometimes when it comes to issues like this I feal like one of the few good kids in a classroom. I remember being in a noisy classroom - my friends and I were being quiet but there was nothing we could do about the others. I feal the same way now. I believe in equality completely but there is very little I can do to show others, what should be, the bloody obvious. To show them that other people's relationships don't effect them. And if they are worried about a gay person hitting on them then they just say 'Sorry I'm not interested.' Which is exactly what you would do with anyone you weren't attracted to. Thank you for the video.
This was beautiful and powerful. When i linked to your channel from the supercarlinbrothers video about Pixar, I thought you sounded pretty smart and opinionated. I was curious. I was not prepared for power, compassion, and beauty. Your words are amazing, your voice is powerful and keep sharing what you share... because it moved me and I know it can move more.
powerful.. liked and subscribed. everything you said is absolutely true. It annoys me that straight people can talk about boyfriends or girlfriends but the moment there's a same sex couple brought up it's "in their face." also youre really pretty :) loved the poem and it was well written/spoken too! i'll share this
I honestly dont know why people were complaining about it because this channel has helped so many people with their sexuality and Ashley your doing an amazing job love you!
Please make more super gay videos! Oh wait, I mean more videos that you want to make that don't need a label because everything you create touches many people in a positive light, no matter the context. We are here for you, not parts of you, the whole you.
John Thunder can we get a fact check over here in isle 3 please 😂 I'm not even going to waste my time with an argument ... let's all just slow clap John out ... 👏
John Thunder 99.999 percent of the USA opposes homosexuals? You are clearly not educated for you. Maybe you should take up stand-up comedy because YOU ARE HILARIOUS. Come to Canada or the UK where the majority of people except homosexuals. Gays can marry in both countries since 2006 and 2012. Welcome to reality sweetheart :)
I'm a biromantic asexual, and it frustrates me that even within the LGBT community, I constantly get told "We get it, you're ace!" "Asexual? Stop making up sexualities. This is why people can't take us seriously." "Don't worry, you'll change your mind one day." It's just so infuriating that we get pushed away and discriminated against within another discriminated group. I love this video so much because (not only is it just a great video in general) but because us aces face the same kind of "WE GET IT." response from the LGBT community itself.
Mary McGinnis As a lesbian demisexual, I feel your pain, even people who are asexual have asked me what it is and what it means and yet demisexual falls under the asexual spectrum..
Mary McGinnis I'm An Aromantic/ Ace Transman myself. and it's Rare that I find people that accept it. I'm so glad though that one of them is my boss! She was asking me if a new hire looked cute then quickly added, " I know you're not into that, but just on his looks. is he pleasing to look at?" I couldn't help but laugh! Someone from an older generation understood! While mine is high on hormones.... And I'm 20. People in my classes,( whom I am close to) look at me like a freak when they ask around the group who still has their V card and when I proudly state that I do. it's like a challenge, a game to them to convince me to loose it...
Mary McGinnis I'm a heteroromantic Asexual, yet oddly enough, I don't get much slack over it. I guess I'm just in a really lucky place where heteronormativity and cisgender superiority, and gender binary systems are not dominant. I'm in a place where no one tries to pray the gay away, and if they do, they are not vocal because if they are they are the ones who are shunned. Maybe I'm just not observant enough, but it seems where I live and reside, LGBTQIA* is not a bad thing, its just a thing, a piece on the board of a persons identity. I don't live in a paradise, things do come up, subtle but sinister, but they don't last, they don't spread, and they aren't accepted by the norm.
Mary McGinnis I don't have much affiliation with the LGBT community I suppose, but I get the "I get it, you're asexual" waaaaay too much from my friends. They're not trying to hurt me, they're just getting bored of hearing it. But what they don't understand is I wouldn't bother declaring it unless I felt it needed to be reminded. Needed to be almost thrown in their face because of how much it's not being considered. And it's usually just because they're nearby when a new person comes along misaligning me and misunderstanding me, so they just get to hear as I continually define myself in an attempt to be understood. I'm pretty sure that's the biggest reason why anyone talks about they're queer sexuality- they feel threatened when conversation is clearly ignoring why they are of a certain nature.
Arionlappy Sorry, I'm gay but what's it like being asexual? I'm not trying to intrude I'm just wondering about how your friends act around you, what they say? Like do they still try and introduce you to people? Feel free to not answer, I'm just curious.
one day i talk with the nurse of my school about my orientation 'cause i ask question about sexuality. When i said that i'm bi she said "that"s just a phase!" ..... that was really strange for me that the person who was charged of the physic and psychic health of the childs in this school don't understand the concept of bisexuality and say such stupid things than bisexuality is a phase.
I dated a girl for a week and everyone was like "Your lesbian?" "Your bi?" No I am pansexual and then they ask if that's like bisexual. NO it's not. Everyday people asked me or looked at us like we were weird. I came out to my friends and mom it's not like I was lying I just never mentioned it cause I didn't think it was important and it's like no matter how many people you "Come out" to you're never really out because there are always new people who don't know. I'd rather not have to tell everyone I meet I am pansexual but everyone assumes I'm straight so it's hard.
Bisexuality and Pansexuality are not the same at all! Bisexual people generally like 2 genders usually being Male and female. Pansexual individuals can like anyone if they are a girl a boy or transgender or bi-gender or a female with male organs. Gender-fuildity is not "made up" it is a real gender. And being "both" usually means they have the same stereotypical features or actions of a female or male. Like a masculine female so yes they are real and it is not "made up"
+Devin Lacy I love the word partner! I use it for boyfriends and girlfriends and nonbinaryfriends alike! Since I started using it, people have stopped assuming I've "gone straight" or "turned back to girls" when I talk about people I'm dating. If they want to know more, they have to investigate, and let's be honest, it's always funny to see new friends or co-workers try and work out your sexual orientation without asking outright. Partners in crime and partners in love! Tune in next week to see how Kirose's aunt responds when she repeatedly uses gender neutral terms to refer to her partner!
+Devin Lacy I personally prefer it, if someone asks me "Do you have a boyfriend", I always feel uncomfortable, but if someone asks me "Do you have a Partner", it makes me feel super less awkward (I'm Panromanic and Ace)
Not many videos have changed my life. In fact, none have, until now. As a closeted pan person, I'm compelled to come out, but fear my very conservative families reaction
Jack Rota if you feel unsafe, like they would disown you or abuse you, wait till you are independent and can support yourself. Just hold on, it will be alright.
This is so powerful, I almost cried watching it. I could write a super long response but really what all those words would come down to is: thank you for speaking up!
I fucking love this so much. People don't get it and I've never been sure how to word it perfectly but now I can direct them to you, to this video, to this beacon of genius and amazingness that still sticks to my heart every day. Every time I turn around I'm bombarded even behind closet doors. I hear something about it every solingle day and it batters and beats me and I want to scream, but I don't. I scream and I'll get beat, thrown down, thown out, and my feet can only take me so far. Thank you for making this. Thank you for making this channel, a place I can go in a prodominantly heteronormarive, homophobic, bi-eraesive environment. Thank you for making my life better. Thank you for helping me and others like me. Thank you for being you.
I'm not gay but. I hate that a child is default straight. That they aren't undecided to begin with and then they can make their own lives. And that people stop being relatives because someone has a religion. I understand that religion is a large part of certain peoples lives but is family not more. I'm saying this because I have a relative who is gay. Someone else in my family won't go to her WEDDING! Because they have a religion and depend so much on said religion. It just annoys me. I hope you agree.
As a straight, white male, that was rough to listen to. But necessary. Because I'm guilty of every charge here except the ones I've never had a chance to commit, and that hurts to realize and to admit. I'm trying to be better, to confront all of my homophobia, sexism, and racism, but it's hard, because consciously I'm none of those things. So thank you, because this helps me see you and me more clearly.
This makes me so happy! I always wondered how people can think stuff like "I don't want to be bombarded by your sexuality" I can't help but think "what if I said, "oh your sexual orientation is offencive to me. I'm so tired of seeing a guy make out with a girl, stop shoving it in my face! I get it your straight" can u even imagen the reactions if a gay person said that!? this is really powerful! " yes, I'm gay. But no, you don't get it"
Do you know what people like you and bible thumpers have in common you're the only ones that makes a big deal about sexuality. No one gives a shit if you are straight or gay.
Whette Fahrtz That's actually not even kinda true. Mater of fact the amount of kids in high school who get the shit beat out of them when they come out as being gay proves you wrong. But i wish you were right. However your not right.
+Whette Fahrtz Do you hate facts? The discrimination LGBT people face in this country alone - and don't even get me started on other countries - is well documented and not even close to gone. You are exactly who this poem is addressed to. Say what you said to the people who get beaten for who they are, the ones who get raped to 'turn' them, the ones who are murdered because someone decided it would be better if they were dead. Say that to the people who get fired, are denied housing, are kicked out of their families. The kids who are bullied into killing themselves. Trust me. Lots of people give a shit.
Whette Fahrtz there is so very much wrong with what you just said. And not all Christians all "bible thumpers". I am a Christian and not only am I not against homosexuality but I'm a huge lbgtq+ supporter and that's because if you actually read the Bible you'll see that is not a damn thing wrong with homosexuality God loves variety and he always has. The Bible teaches love, screwed up people teaches hate and use the Bible to do it. And just because I'm not against homosexuality doesn't mean I can't understand the other side of it and why Christians think that it's wrong. Stop with the one way tolerance. Also , telling people that their pain isn't real and that it doesn't happen and it's in the head and they're making a big deal out of it... that's it is f***** up. Don't pull that s***, because you don't know who you're affecting. I hope something changes you're very messed up you on life, because you are the problem. Saying that it's not a big deal and homofobia isn't still a big problem, doesn't make it go away you just make it worse. So maybe think before you attack one group and Patronize another. I'll pray for you.
Whenever I see a girl who just goes on and on about her boyfriend and kisses him all the time in front of everyone, I should just say, "We get it, you're straight. You don't need to shove it on my face."
Miss Adjusted my friends always talk about boys and shit and none of them know im pans and they always ask me if i have a crush on any of the boys and id always make up crushes to them so i would seem normal
Well (most) straight people don't go rubbing their sexuality in other people's face. Some gay people just can't shut up that they're gay because they've got nothing else about them that's interesting. If you're a person, you should be given respect.
Amazing video amazing person. Qualified? No. Voting for people on their beliefs and not their political and economic knowledge?That's how we get crappy presidents. She's doing her job by bringing awareness to people who then vote for who they want with the information's shes given them. I support that. Ashley Mardell for enlightening our country!
Oh the assonance.....alliteration....rhyming..the delivery and overall message, your a wizard, truly. A 'poem-smith', an artist, a lyrical genius.................. an inspiration. My inspiration.
+Ashley Mardell I can't tell you how much I love this video. It is literally my favorite video on the entire internet, my favorite video in the world. I watch this daily and cry over it when I feel just like this because I connect to this and I get it. I am gay, I'm a lesbian and this happens to me so often to the point where sometimes I wish I didn't live in a world so uneducated. I can't express how much I love you for making these videos how much time and effort you put into them and I wanted to tell you that I and thousands of other people feel the same way as me about your videos. Don't ever take anybody's shit and continue doing what you love. You inspire me and leave me empathetic and leave me thinking constantly about the injustice we face and what I can do to change our world. I love you.
+Ashley Mardell I found you because UA-cam suggested your 'I got a tattoo' vid (I loved it !) and I´m really happy about it. Now I am really addicted to your vids and I have to say that this vid here is my fav so far. I love how you stand up for what you are and for other people (sry for my english xD) Just keep doin what you doin! XO :)
This hit me hard Ashley, literally feel so upset about those awful comments right now. Don't let those people bring you down, do what you your doing to help people out. I'm so amazed by the way you speak and basically this entire video was done in one take! Beautiful video Ashley :)
my friend just linked this to me saying about how he's on the verge of crying because of how relatable this is... you are amazing and I'm definitely adding this to favorites. for what it's worth, I'm sorry you have to put up with the bullshit everyday of your life.
Every time I feel down or outcasted due to my sexuality I watch this video through and almost always feel better. Thank you Ashley for your artistic beauty!
This was the first vid I watched of you. It made me cry. Thank you so much. I'm still confused about my sexuality. I don't know what to do. But I'll get through it, thanks to you Ashley. Thank you. You probably won't comment on this (no one else ever has) but that's okay. I hope you live a happy life.
i was confused of my sexuality too! I found out about 5 months after i turned eleven, (two months ago) Im bisexual, also if you don't the genders here is a list of them: Bisexual: you like both genders Straight: you like the opposite gender Gay: You like the same gender Lesbian you like the same gender (more refered to girls)
also, there's asexual which means without sexual feelings or emotions (there's also more but i don't know all of them plus it be too long to explain all of them)
+Fernygaming Although there are more sexualities and more layers to the spectrum I'm glad your trying to help and to the top comment I suggest you research and I hope you have success finding something that fits you! Good luck :D
This was so powerful, and so eloquent. Not only did you make your point so clearly, but you did so in a well thought out poem. This is a work of art as well as a necessary message for everyone. I cried.
The fact that I can see twelve or more heterosexual relationships on a single television programme and almost never find one makes me want to tear my hair out and scream. And then when I find one-- just one show, out of a thousand, with some vague representation, it's hardly ever hashed out- it's hardly ever as detailed as the others, it's hardly ever as romantic or as healthy or as interesting as the others. And when there's ever more than one lgbt character, people say it's only catering to the gay agenda. As if. I don't complain every time I see a straight couple, I don't complain every single moment I look at UA-cam thumbnails and advertisements and newspaper ads and the news on the TV and shows and in books and magazines and in school and every sort of digital media, I don't complain whenever I overhear someone- or everyone- talking about their opposite-sex partner. But the moment there is significant representation, I've somehow rubbed them the wrong way. As if. As if I'm not already shaking at the mere mention of my sexuality because I know that if I tell the wrong person and the word gets out, I have no idea where my life could go. As if I'm not already biting my tongue, hesitating to mention who I really am even in a passing, polite conversation to a close friend, for the simple reason of I'm afraid to lose them-- no matter how many personal details they've given to me about their own relationship. As if I'm not already crying because I have a homophobic father who would either kill me or kick me out of the house if he found out about a simple part of me that I can't change, no matter how much I've tried. As if I'm not already uneasy about any conversation pertaining to my orientation. As if I'm not already terrified. And when I do... THAT'S when I'm "too gay". For mentioning my crush, or the mere fact that it exists. I'm gay. And the only reason I've ever learned to accept this passing fact about myself is because I had a close friend who taught me that I am more than my father and I am more than the idea that he put on me, that society put on me. I had a close friend who killed herself because her parents wouldn't accept her for who she was either, I had a close friend who made me realize I was gay and was ripped apart from me not a week later because her own family found out. But if you're straight you never had to learn the passing fact about yourself. Because everyone had already drilled it in you. But they drilled it in me, too, even though that's in no world the way I am. I can't even say it aloud in the real world, I can only say it on the internet, where things are lost and preserved forever, because I would never even risk saying something so 'horrible', I would never risk having someone overhear my darkest, most hideous horrible secrets. Something I'm not even ashamed of until someone asks about it. Ask me while I'm anonymous, and I'll tell you everything happily-- I'm gay, I'm homoromantic and I'm proud to be homoromantic and I'm proud to belong- albeit anonymously- to a community as diverse and supportive as the LGBTQ+ community. Ask me in person, and I'll begin trembling, I'll lose my voice and I won't meet your eye. I'll shut my mouth and I won't say a word. If you're cisgender and straight, that's great. But appreciate the fact that you will never have to come out, that you will never be refused service for who you are and who you choose to love. Appreciate the fact that your marriage won't be a "gay marriage", it'll just be a (real) marriage. The real mirage is the idea that somehow those two things are different, that somehow gender and sex determine legitimacy. Jesus. I'm just ranting.
honestly the only representation i can find for ace people is todd from bojack horseman, and that's only addressed towards the end of season 3. I wish there was more representation for it.
John Thunder Oh look, someone drank the kool aid... There is nothing satanic about the rainbow flag, or homosexuality. If someone else's sexuality makes you feel oookie, that is your business, but that doesn't make them wrong, doesn't make them satan spawn, and doesn't mean that 99.999% of anyone agrees with you. Go away you sad little troll.
i love this. i revisit this video every once in a while because it really affects me. i am pan and often feel invalidated, but as a member of the lgbtq+ community i am a part of this and i understand what it means to be gay. this poem is my everyday inner struggle and i love it so much.
Please don't stop your videos! As a mother of a daughter who had been repeatedly torn down by her peers for her differences, you are an inspiration for her and myself. I only wish I had found a way through all the peer expectations as well you have. Know that you have changed lives!!! We live in the Twin Cities and I can't tell you what it would mean for a chance to meet you.
You are really an incredibly talented artist. I find your way with words just amazing, and your expressiveness when speaking is breathtaking. Never stop writing, never stop posting videos.
Breathtakingly beautiful. Being gay, I completely understand and relate. You gave me an interesting perspective. Instead of thinking like I'm "too gay" I could think that everyone around me is "too straight" and I really am so about that.
I know this is an older video, and this happened a long time ago. But I just wanted you, Ash Hardell, to know that you ARE a positive and needed voice for the LGBT youth, and beyond.I discovered you through a video the SuperCarlinBrothers did with you. I decided to check out your channel, and I got hooked. Since that day, about a couple days ago, I have been able to further my understanding of my own sexuality, along with others. I am a mix of a couple different sexualities, which is confusing, but I feel like it fits me the best. Thank you, for teaching me, and countless others, about sexuality and gender. You are valuable, and needed, and an amazing human being.
My dear wonderful and precious Ashley, I can't even begin to tell you how much I needed this today. A friend told me earlier about how many people in my class are talking behind my back that I am "behaving too gay" and such. So, when I saw your video title I was like: Oh...is she gonna tell me to just shut the hell up, because I'm just some 'baby-dyke' ? But then I watched it and it was just so wonderful to hear what you said, you really gave me hope and strength to just be myself and not let them make me cover up who I am. So...thank you a lot, this was so very needed. :*
Every time someone says to me "you're gay we get it" or my mom tells me that I don't need to "announce to the world" that I'm gay cause according to her I'm not, I rewatch this video over and over until I realize it's not my fault I am who I am. Ash, you have no idea how much this video is a life saver to me.
I wish my mom could see this. And my sister. While my mom simply thinks you don't "know til your older and you shouldn't label yourself Julia the girl who wanted to go out with you and you said yes to was just trying to manipulate you." Except now she refuses to even acknowledge she was a girl she just says "that .... Person who I made you not date." I'm 18 now , it's not like I'm a little middle school kid and even kids that young know, I did in a way, I just didn't process it. My sister on the other hand is the one who complains about other girls being gay and thinks they're gonna hit on her cause one girl said she's cute( said girl has a girlfriend , ALL THE GIRLS IN HER GRADE TALK LIKE THAT not to mention she never messaged my sister privately or anything.) but then she prances around say that "omg I need a GBF! I need one in college!" But then tells me I "can't date a girl or be gay cause I was with a boy once." And gets annoyed if I say there's possibly no than the stereotypical
(Cont) gay kid. We were watching glee the other day , and the one gay character , who's her stereotype dream, is invited to join this club at his college. It was one of the many musical clubs, and all the people or most of them looked stereotypically "queer." I had not seen that episode in so long I forgot what the club was, and suggested it was possibly a lgbt music kinda club. To which she responds "ugh why does everything have to be gay!" Another example is I watch Stevens universe, and incredibly LGBT inclusive kids show, with excellent representation of queer women. Now we have one canon girl and girl pairing, one canon unrequited love between two female characters although ones dead, she's still getting over the death of her love. Now there are other characters hinted at being with each other often throughout the show, and if I bring it up I get "ugh Julia why do yo have to make it gay can't they just be friends we already have Ruby and Sapphire!!" I hope she gets more accepting
julia oneill My god, my mom practically says the same thing!!!! "It takes a while to figure this stiff out, and I hate the lables" Jeez that's all she can talk about now days, labels.
I AM SO SORRY. After seeing this I literally started crying. You are so amazing. I am a woman, and even though I am straight I face tons of discrimination, and I talk about it. The whole time I was watching I was nodding, because I know EXACTLY what you are talking about. It's so easy for someone to say, "Okay, ENOUGH, I get it," when really, they will never get it. I wish that society was different, and that it wasn't so hard for people to be themselves. I wish that so much. But you do such an amazing job. You're bubbly and enthusiastic and gushing with pride, and I could not be happier for you. I just know you're changing hearts with every video. Thank you so much for being an inspiration in my life.
+Hanna Jane If I only ever talked about being from Ohio, and people got sick of it. Does that make them Ohioaphobes, or does that make me boring and uninsightful?
+spider milk Does anyone slander you repeatedly or ask you invasive questions about living in Ohio? "Wow, Ohio? That's rough." "How do you have Ohio sex?" "What's it like to live in the most underrepresented state in America?" "When will people who live in Ohio be allowed to get married?" No? Then you must realize it's not the same thing at all. When you compare a tragic and annoying phenomenon like being told you're "too gay" to something as mundane and normalized as living in Ohio, you miss the entire point of this video.
Sierra Maitland I went to school in a super poor, drug addicted area. I was a weak, goofy kid, and the kids with shitty druggy parents would beat the shit out of me, daily. I got sent to the hospital once. I learned how to carry my self before high school, and quit bitching. It stopped. I'm kind of glad it happened. I've never mentioned it to my friends, because I've always had other things to talk about. Never considered it that tragic really. I see so many people go through so much more. Yet I see kids wear so much less as a crucifix. Being hurt by every little petty thing has too make life unbearable. How the fuck can you even enjoy life, when being asked a misinformed question is such a fucking traumatic experience for you?
+Hanna Jane I wouldn't say anyone who says "We get it, you're gay" is necessarily homophobic, but most definitely showcasing their privilege. As is anyone comparing being part of the LGBTQ+ community to being from Ohio. **cough**
THIS IS AWESOME! YOU ARE AWESOME! Also, I want to add : as a young teenager I hate when adults say"there shouldn't be so much representation of gay people in the internet, because kids and young people will think it's a trend" like, I can't really say anything about non-heterosexual people to some adults without them saying "oh my god you young kids have trends, I am sure most of them aren't actually gay/pan/ace/etc They are just saying it fir attention" like, no? Why can't someone be gay without wanting attention!!!?
There's no quota, there's ignorance And all high school's indifference May lead to these discriminations We are still people of thy nations What makes us different from those who resent Is being forced out to represent Asked "what it's like to be gay" "Well, the same as people feel on Monday" Just because we orientate differently It doesn't mean we feel differently Our sexuality feels as natural as yours The only difference is we band for protection And we are only just being recognised by law So go ahead, act like we're lucky Why don't you tell that to kids who are jumpy Because they were mugged for being gay "But at least you're not trans." Horray Because that topic is so different And you wonder why Lesbian Gay Bisexual Transsexual Unite When you straight folk go give us a fright So go ahead. Push me. I might just fall When you learn my bi secret step back or I'll roar Else my limp body just might float to shore.
This video really spoke to me. I could go on and on about its importance, but I'll just talk about one point that means a lot to me. The lack of representation of the lgbtq+ community in media really annoys me. I'm asexual and despite searching I've only come across a couple of texts with asexual characters, and none of them are mainstream. Its really disheartening, as representation can be crucial in helping youth work out who they are. Personally, seeing an ace character in the indie webcomic Rain was a turning point for understanding myself - it was so important, I can barely begin to describe how much it meant.
same here! that sense of othering is hard to escape even within the LGBT+ community because there's very sexual stuff everywhere. I might have to check out that comic though!
AnonymousDalek If you like fantasy books, then I'd really recommend Clariel by Garth Nix - the protagonist is asexual (like, very very obviously asexual - I asked the author, when he did a Q&A, and he confirmed that she is), and the book is part of a pretty popular series called the Old Kingdom series. It's really well written and I'd recommend it even if you weren't searching for representation :)
I'm ace too (and panromantic so hoo boy double whammy of ORIENTATIONS THAT TOTALLY DONT EXIST), and my god I know this feeling so well. Seeing ace characters in media being good, kind, valued individuals sometimes makes me cry. It's so, so important.
AnonymousDalek I can't resist saying this. Maybe you're not into anime/manga at all so you don't even need to reply or acknowledge this comment, but most people agree that the main character of One Piece is asexual. It's never outright stated that he's ace but he's never shown an ounce of attraction to anyone (in 790 chapters), even if a beautiful woman stands naked in front of him. He's completely indifferent to sex and attraction of any kind, even when other characters get nosebleeds left and right. Considering it's the highest selling manga of all time (and just got into Guinness World Records, too) it's really nice to see. There's some debate around the topic because a lot of fans want him paired off with different people and refuse to accept that he's ace but in my mind, and the mind of most die-hard fans, he obviously is, and I think if you're looking for more media that shows asexual characters, you could always read One Piece. Luffy, the main character, in no way needs to have sex/romance involved to be one of the most hilarious, strong, and inspiring characters of all time and his complete lack of interest in the topic is never mocked or even mentioned by his crew (he's a pirate captain, I should mention). As a nice bonus, it's probably one of the greatest stories ever told.
I can, in some way relate to this. I'm bi and I sometimes talk about a new girl crush that I have and my brother will yell "Oh my gosh, we get it! Stop talking about her!" and so I don't want to talk about it anymore and my parents ask why I'm not more open about that stuff. It's because almost every time, I'm shamed for it.
Every video of yours is amazing. Everything from the editing, to the content, to your personality and everything in between makes me not able to wait for a new video. Keep it up
Wonderful job! I'm right now doing my MA thesis on the misrepresentations of bisexuality on two TV shows (Torchwood and Orange is the New Black) and it's incredible the amount of misunderstandings, dismissals and ignorance among the public and even the critics I'm quoting from. Thanks for speaking up for the community, we need voices like yours. If the gay community is invisible, try the bisexual community... incredible.
Memelovescaps I went on a class trip somewhere a few days after the first episode of torchwood where Ianto and Jack kissed. One of the teachers complained to the class about how "Just because it was past the watershed doesn't mean they have to show to guys kissing" Like it was somehow Worse than a full nude heterosexual sex scene.
Memelovescaps I'd love to know your thoughts on this. I am bisexual too and hate the lack of media representation. Especially when CHAPMAN IS CLEARLY BISEXUAL and its meant to be 'an amazing LGBT' show especially with laverne cox and all and i do love the show but wow does it piss me off that they dont say it!
am oh yes, the fact that the word BI only appears once in 26 episodes and not in a very positive context is a huge topic in my dissertation. Also the fact that the rest of the characters talk about "go back to being gay", as if it's an "either/or" option and you have to be either one gay or straight, with no in-between. I defend, however, that Chapman is putting a somewhat resistance to this system, although she isn't as vocal as she should... but yeah, it pisses me of as well that they don't categorize her as bisexual when she clearly is, while there's no problem in categorizing her as "former lesbian girl" and several other categorizations that don't make any sense...
Bogwedgle Indeed, it's like what Ashley says in this video that straight say "I'm not in the mood for a gay bar" EXCUSE ME? Do I ever say "I'm not in the mood" when I go to a non-gay bar? Do straight people have to be "in the mood" to go to a "straight" bar? Or do they simply walk into a bar? This is just getting silly... And the same goes for Jack and Ianto's kiss, it simply should be categorized as a romantic or sexual kiss, not as a gay kiss... besides, neither of them is gay anyways, so why it should be called gay kiss? I get very frustrated when I have to analyse things like these LOL
THANK YOU, thank you for standing up for me while i have an invalid voice, as i was removed from school for the bullies and as i was kicked out of my home for coming out, thank you for being here and i know you wont really see this but thank you for saying theses words that help me feel free in my own body even thought i am hated and locked in a key-less box i know your words will break my box and free me to be who i am
this was beautiful. this is kind of how i feel when i see comments online that say "stop talking about race" or " stop making ( insert black youth killed here ) about race ". we want no pity party I'm not one to draw attention to myself. we talk about our race cause we have to. obviously i will never understand your personal struggle cause I'm straight but i really enjoyed watching it and seeing the passion in your eyes. never stop talking cause you're helping a lot of people with your videos.
Livi's Vlog You're not even "making" it about race. You're acknowledging that something is about race, and others are blind to that. KEEP TALKING ABOUT IT LADY! :)
To the people who say " i get why there was one parade for lgbt, but one every year? Why? I dont get praised for being straight" look at it this way: you dont need to be praised. I put my friends and family on the line when i come out to people close to me. I get praised for having the guts to do it. You arent going to be terrorized for being straight. But somehow i am terrorized fo loving someone that is put into the same gender group as me. Whats sad is if ash's girlfriend was a boy, they would not be refused service in resteraunts, or constantly reminded that in this day and age, they will never be the the same as the usuals. The straights. But lets get this straight: in a world full of hatred everyone should be allowed to love, and yet, were not
I considered myself quite in tune with my sexuality and my struggles as a gay woman until I watched this video. I thought that while I had adversity here and there, that overall it wasn't so bad because my family, while disapproving, didn't completely disown me. Or that I have never been physically beaten for my sexuality. But you've made me think about the struggles I face every day, every hour, that I've become so accustomed to, I consider normal. That my mom has called every girlfriend I've ever had (for the past 9 years) my "friend" because it makes HER uncomfortable to acknowledge her daughter has a girlfriend. That every picture post on social media of me and my girlfriend that might even hint to others that we are anything but friends is kind of risqué and I'm being a little defiant every time. That twinge of anxiety every time I meet a new person who gives me even the slightest of strange looks because I wonder "do they suspect? What do they think?" The incessant questioning by my grandmother if I think this boy or that boy is cute. She just flat out refusal to acknowledge that gay IS an orientation and that my relationship is not only valid, it's not a spectacle or a gimmick or a way to get attention or a bandaid to a larger problem. It's just love. Thank you for reminding me that even myself, an aware homosexual, has allowed myself to normalize discrimination.
Definitely my favourite video and poem! It helped me so much because I often had the feeling that everything I am going to say might be "too gay" and annoying for my friends which are mostly heterosexual. But with the help of the poem I recognized that I can say everything which is on my mind. I am a lesbian and that's leads too the fact that the things I say often "point out my queerness". Just like my friends point out there heterosexuality through their talks. Thank you for this beautiful poem and the message of it. Best Greetings from Germany! :)
i love this as a bisexual its so true what people do. they think they can push us around and keep us down. but this is evidence that they cant. keep doing what your doing. and I hope I can be as proud of my sexuality as you are
I am forced to face my gay every time gay is mentioned anywhere and my parents look at me with an "Oh. That's one of her kind" expression on their faces. I am forced to face my gay when my friend thinks she's being nice and posts a pro-gay post on Instagram and tags me in it and when she sends me every post on Instagram every story on tumblr every video on UA-cam even mentioning gays. I didn't ask for this "othering" for this calling out and reminder that this story or post or video is different from the others because the person who made it is proud to be who they are. Thank you Ashley for this amazing video, I can't tell you how many times I've watched it. It sums up everything I feel all the time. It's good to know that we are not alone.
I adore this video. I've watched it so many times now and it still gets to me. I haven't cried yet but I still feel quite strongly about this. I want this video to be shown to as many people as possible, so I recommended it to the Fine Brothers react channel. Please please please if anyone reads this, make sure that the Fine Brothers see this video. It needs to be shared to more and more people.
Ingrid Odé TigequgestrawomalamanattsnakanbeavevyothrFriofmonth. If you don't memorize that and pronounce it perfectly every time you refer to me I'll have you charged with a hate crime. Those are my rights as a typical university student.
What are you stupid? It's tigequgestrawomalamanattskakabeavevyothrFriofmonth. It's not that hard. Get it perfect next time or you are automatically equal to a member of the KKK.
? How can you be 9 and CONVINCED you are gay, like wtf grow some balls first. Proves that kids think it's now 'cool' to be gay... My comment was not meant to hurt you but i'd rather say it how it is (in my opinion)
Thank you. I am transgender AND *drumroll* GAY! I know...I know. Double trouble. Yet my parents don't get it. Don't accept it. My mother won't give up on having a daughter eventhough she never had one to begin with (I have a brother so...that makes two sons.) Sorry, mom, but... I'm not sorry. Anyway, I do hope people get it one day, so we could all just FUCKING LIVE OUR LIVES LIKE EVERY FUCKING OTHER PERSON!
yo I totally feel u my mother has wanted a sweet little girly girl since I was accidentally given life but hah nope she ended up with this weirdo gay sassafras teen who always tries to make it up to her, the worst part is I haven't come out about being a lesbian yet and she already hates me. but it's ok cause my friends are either gay too or super don't care which is all that matters.
I don't know who you are but you have such great presence and really got me thinking. You definitely deserve more subscribers. You have such a beautiful soul.
I get stuff like this from my mum. A passing mention of my sexuality or the sexuality of the LGBTQA characters that i'm happy exist, caused her to reply "alright you're bi. Enough." She says she's not homophobic and that she doesn't care about my sexuality, but I WANT her to care. Because saying she doesn't care is like saying "I can ignore it." She doesn't see how i crumble with each passing homophobic comment she says. I still feel like she thinks I'm "going through a phase" that one day i'll wake up and suddenly realise "oh silly me i guess i wasn't bi after all".
+Jj Nelson what this persons mother is doing is completely disregarding the feelings of their own child. And you're right that is is one thing, but she should actively support them regardlessly.
Wow. I almost cried because that reminded me of myself. Your channel has helped me realise so many things about myself that i probably would have kept hidden away. You and your channel mean so much to me, and that was absolutely beautiful.
You've got an iron will to keep being honest. Most days, I just keep my mouth shut. Every time I've tried to talk about my orientation no one ever believes me because apparently I'm "too pretty." All gay people look the same, right? Ugh.
Thank you for this. It explains it all. My friends don't get it so I sent them this. I hope they watched it. Because it hurts and they don't know it and know they are doing it.
Ashley, just, yes. Thank you. For making this video and saying these things. You got me very emotional. I rlly liked this video. Plz keep doing what you are doing, being happy.
Ashley Mardell Coming from a straight male who has been subbed to your chan pre-Grace (i been on a couple google hangouts w u) I will be honest, I was considering an unsubscribe, and not because I have anything against you, but due to the lack of videos I can relate to. You can understand my reasoning for that. However, watching this gave me a new insight on you and your videos, which I will continue to watch and stay subbed to your chan. You are very intellectual, and are a great entertainer. Keep up the great work Ashley, and I will stay a loyal fan :) Cheers!
"So when you say 'We get it, you're gay', I can't help but think 'Yes. I am gay. But no. You don't get it.'"
This is so powerful and I have goosebumps now. Thank you so much for this video.
That last bit moved me to tears
+Emma Lebendig So you only started crying then?
Yeah this video defiantly opened my eyes and this was the second video I watched of hers and it really brought me to this channel.
when ever one of my "supportive" peers says this i'm going to show them this
People say, "you're gay we get it" when a person that is in an online chat or so only talks about them being gay,its annoying and its not a personality
This is it. This is the best video. This is art. This is truth.
your right
Alexa M on point
Same
Ruth Okay
did i tell you how much i love spoken word?
GirlfriendsTV I'm the opposite, with the exception of Ashley's work. like woah.
My school blocked your channel. I'm disappointed and angry because your videos are so educational and important, but I'm not surprised because I live in an area where I got yelled at by a teacher for telling my friend that I'm gay (not as a joke, in a serious manner) and where another queer kid was laughed at by classmates in the middle of a basketball game, so he left the gym and got three days in detention while the bullies were let free. It sucks, because in the middle of the day where I get ignored by a majority of my classmates for being the gay kid, I just want something to have that makes me feel normal, and your videos help, but I can't because every video that mentions someone who isn't straight is blocked.
u are a saint! I just wanna keep u, is that weird? idunno but I'm serious.
+gia. Exactly.
It's actually illegal for schools in america to censor/filter queer specific content, unless it's explicitly inappropriate (meaning it contains sex or something). You could technically sue them for that, and for the bullying/discrimination. That's quite literally all illegal
+Cally A Quiet SJW.
hangl00se69 meaning ?
That feeling when being bisexual. Dated a man for 11 months, family started regarding me as if I had just stepped off of a flying saucer.
Eventually we break up. Get a girlfriend.
"Yeah, he was gay, but he's cured."
*puts imaginary gun to my head, pulls imaginary trigger*
NoiseMarines ouch...
NoiseMarines 'cured' iconic
I know a girl where something similar happened, she sat her family down and talked to them about Pansexuality, and they understood after that, and accepted her.
started the year with a boyfriend. now have a girlfriend, grandfather now hates me despite LOVING his gay brother in law because he doesn't understand bisexuality. I never thought any of this would be an issue. the thing is, he loves my girlfriend, he just doesn't like me for having one!
+NoiseMarines I get them feels, bro. Gender means zilch to me, but I've dated more women than men, so when I married my husband, everyone seems to think I was "cured" as well.
Seriously, guys?
Seriously?
I have never said 'We get it you're gay.' Not in words or text - but I may have thought it & for that I apologise.
Sometimes when it comes to issues like this I feal like one of the few good kids in a classroom. I remember being in a noisy classroom - my friends and I were being quiet but there was nothing we could do about the others. I feal the same way now. I believe in equality completely but there is very little I can do to show others, what should be, the bloody obvious. To show them that other people's relationships don't effect them. And if they are worried about a gay person hitting on them then they just say 'Sorry I'm not interested.' Which is exactly what you would do with anyone you weren't attracted to.
Thank you for the video.
Daniel O'Donovan "but I may have thought it & for that I apologise." < mad respect for you.
This was beautiful and powerful. When i linked to your channel from the supercarlinbrothers video about Pixar, I thought you sounded pretty smart and opinionated. I was curious. I was not prepared for power, compassion, and beauty. Your words are amazing, your voice is powerful and keep sharing what you share... because it moved me and I know it can move more.
Same!
That's where I'm from too!
That's where I came from too
That's where I found her too but I didn't subscribe though
ditto
I honestly don't care about your sexual orientation. Gay, Strait, Bi, A, etc. If you're a person, you deserve respect.
period.
Preach it👍👍🙌😊
please explain this to the westboro baptist church
👍
Kyra The Tree Pixie yeah but why does one of them only get a parade?
Well heres a pad, :)
powerful.. liked and subscribed. everything you said is absolutely true. It annoys me that straight people can talk about boyfriends or girlfriends but the moment there's a same sex couple brought up it's "in their face."
also youre really pretty :) loved the poem and it was well written/spoken too! i'll share this
You should make a book of these poems!!!
Definitely!
President Mardell
Definitely has a nice ring to it!
Yeah!
***** heck id promote her campaign like there was no tomorrow! lol if only she was old enough.
PLEASE
When she turns 35 we know where she'll be
I honestly dont know why people were complaining about it because this channel has helped so many people with their sexuality and Ashley your doing an amazing job love you!
Please make more super gay videos!
Oh wait, I mean more videos that you want to make that don't need a label because everything you create touches many people in a positive light, no matter the context.
We are here for you, not parts of you, the whole you.
***** Thanks Ryan :)
John Thunder can we get a fact check over here in isle 3 please 😂
I'm not even going to waste my time with an argument ... let's all just slow clap John out ... 👏
John Thunder 99.999 percent of the USA opposes homosexuals? You are clearly not educated for you. Maybe you should take up stand-up comedy because YOU ARE HILARIOUS. Come to Canada or the UK where the majority of people except homosexuals. Gays can marry in both countries since 2006 and 2012. Welcome to reality sweetheart :)
***** Well thank you very much! Ashley is one of my favourite humans on earth and love supporting my friends because I agree in what they believe in
I'm a biromantic asexual, and it frustrates me that even within the LGBT community, I constantly get told "We get it, you're ace!" "Asexual? Stop making up sexualities. This is why people can't take us seriously." "Don't worry, you'll change your mind one day." It's just so infuriating that we get pushed away and discriminated against within another discriminated group. I love this video so much because (not only is it just a great video in general) but because us aces face the same kind of "WE GET IT." response from the LGBT community itself.
Mary McGinnis
As a lesbian demisexual, I feel your pain, even people who are asexual have asked me what it is and what it means and yet demisexual falls under the asexual spectrum..
Mary McGinnis I'm An Aromantic/ Ace Transman myself. and it's Rare that I find people that accept it. I'm so glad though that one of them is my boss! She was asking me if a new hire looked cute then quickly added, " I know you're not into that, but just on his looks. is he pleasing to look at?" I couldn't help but laugh! Someone from an older generation understood! While mine is high on hormones.... And I'm 20. People in my classes,( whom I am close to) look at me like a freak when they ask around the group who still has their V card and when I proudly state that I do. it's like a challenge, a game to them to convince me to loose it...
Mary McGinnis I'm a heteroromantic Asexual, yet oddly enough, I don't get much slack over it. I guess I'm just in a really lucky place where heteronormativity and cisgender superiority, and gender binary systems are not dominant. I'm in a place where no one tries to pray the gay away, and if they do, they are not vocal because if they are they are the ones who are shunned. Maybe I'm just not observant enough, but it seems where I live and reside, LGBTQIA* is not a bad thing, its just a thing, a piece on the board of a persons identity. I don't live in a paradise, things do come up, subtle but sinister, but they don't last, they don't spread, and they aren't accepted by the norm.
Mary McGinnis I don't have much affiliation with the LGBT community I suppose, but I get the "I get it, you're asexual" waaaaay too much from my friends. They're not trying to hurt me, they're just getting bored of hearing it. But what they don't understand is I wouldn't bother declaring it unless I felt it needed to be reminded. Needed to be almost thrown in their face because of how much it's not being considered. And it's usually just because they're nearby when a new person comes along misaligning me and misunderstanding me, so they just get to hear as I continually define myself in an attempt to be understood. I'm pretty sure that's the biggest reason why anyone talks about they're queer sexuality- they feel threatened when conversation is clearly ignoring why they are of a certain nature.
Arionlappy Sorry, I'm gay but what's it like being asexual? I'm not trying to intrude I'm just wondering about how your friends act around you, what they say? Like do they still try and introduce you to people? Feel free to not answer, I'm just curious.
Oh my god
Oh my god
This is the best video I have EVER seen. Ashley. FUCK. This is insane. Oh my goodness me I adore you.
doddleoddle aw whoa, that means so much, thanks! ^_^
one day i talk with the nurse of my school about my orientation 'cause i ask question about sexuality. When i said that i'm bi she said "that"s just a phase!" ..... that was really strange for me that the person who was charged of the physic and psychic health of the childs in this school don't understand the concept of bisexuality and say such stupid things than bisexuality is a phase.
Asriel Dreemurr woow that's fucked up, you should go to the principal and try to get her fired!
i'm in another school now. That's finished! no homophobia!
Asriel Dreemurr great!
Well to be quite transparent there is a perspective underwhich I would agree with her.
Wow damn that was rude of her
I dated a girl for a week and everyone was like "Your lesbian?" "Your bi?" No I am pansexual and then they ask if that's like bisexual. NO it's not. Everyday people asked me or looked at us like we were weird. I came out to my friends and mom it's not like I was lying I just never mentioned it cause I didn't think it was important and it's like no matter how many people you "Come out" to you're never really out because there are always new people who don't know. I'd rather not have to tell everyone I meet I am pansexual but everyone assumes I'm straight so it's hard.
Thanks :) That means a lot.
Out of interest how do you differentiate between pan and bi? People have different ideas of it. I'm figuring out my label which is why I ask.
+Kiera The Gerbil Girl Bisexual is the same thing as pansexual.
+Nanni Narayanan Gender-fluid is made-up. Non-binary is bullshit. Only two genders exists and you can't be both either. You can only have one.
Bisexuality and Pansexuality are not the same at all! Bisexual people generally like 2 genders usually being Male and female. Pansexual individuals can like anyone if they are a girl a boy or transgender or bi-gender or a female with male organs. Gender-fuildity is not "made up" it is a real gender. And being "both" usually means they have the same stereotypical features or actions of a female or male. Like a masculine female so yes they are real and it is not "made up"
I hate when people say "partner" like no she's my girlfriend, we aren't doing a fucking science project together.
awesome :-)
+Devin Lacy I love the word partner! I use it for boyfriends and girlfriends and nonbinaryfriends alike! Since I started using it, people have stopped assuming I've "gone straight" or "turned back to girls" when I talk about people I'm dating. If they want to know more, they have to investigate, and let's be honest, it's always funny to see new friends or co-workers try and work out your sexual orientation without asking outright.
Partners in crime and partners in love! Tune in next week to see how Kirose's aunt responds when she repeatedly uses gender neutral terms to refer to her partner!
I tend to refer to my boyfriend as my partner sometimes just to avoid the fucking conversation.
+Devin Lacy I personally prefer it, if someone asks me "Do you have a boyfriend", I always feel uncomfortable, but if someone asks me "Do you have a Partner", it makes me feel super less awkward (I'm Panromanic and Ace)
This.
the way you speak is so beautiful love
grace hiltner Thanks Grace Helbig. Love you too.
Not many videos have changed my life. In fact, none have, until now. As a closeted pan person, I'm compelled to come out, but fear my very conservative families reaction
This helps. I vent my gay through these vid, so from the bottom of my heart, thank tou
Jack Rota if you feel unsafe, like they would disown you or abuse you, wait till you are independent and can support yourself. Just hold on, it will be alright.
Jack Rota You're preaching to the Choir.
I did it
I came out, and things are ok.
This is so powerful, I almost cried watching it. I could write a super long response but really what all those words would come down to is: thank you for speaking up!
I fucking love this so much. People don't get it and I've never been sure how to word it perfectly but now I can direct them to you, to this video, to this beacon of genius and amazingness that still sticks to my heart every day. Every time I turn around I'm bombarded even behind closet doors. I hear something about it every solingle day and it batters and beats me and I want to scream, but I don't. I scream and I'll get beat, thrown down, thown out, and my feet can only take me so far. Thank you for making this. Thank you for making this channel, a place I can go in a prodominantly heteronormarive, homophobic, bi-eraesive environment. Thank you for making my life better. Thank you for helping me and others like me. Thank you for being you.
*single
*heteronormative
I'm not gay but. I hate that a child is default straight. That they aren't undecided to begin with and then they can make their own lives. And that people stop being relatives because someone has a religion. I understand that religion is a large part of certain peoples lives but is family not more. I'm saying this because I have a relative who is gay. Someone else in my family won't go to her WEDDING! Because they have a religion and depend so much on said religion. It just annoys me. I hope you agree.
+Amelia Convey Most children are straight cus' fucking biology idiot!
+allolp go to hell. It doesn't matter what sexuality you have as long as you are a nice person and that is definitely what you aren't.
amazing stuff
+jackhoward too true
Agreed
JackHoward Aw thanks Jack :)
so true
every time I tell someone I am bi they say "sooooooo you only like girls?" it hurts be that some people don't know the difference
The Hopeless Gamer I can’t count on my fingers how many people I know who don’t know what the difference between pan and bi is and it’s IRRITATING.
why are you so awesome?
*****
I like you, you're so human.
I upvoted you but I know about you guys because of Amy Ordman hahahaha
"But no, you don't get it." Powerful stuff. You're amazing
As a straight, white male, that was rough to listen to. But necessary. Because I'm guilty of every charge here except the ones I've never had a chance to commit, and that hurts to realize and to admit. I'm trying to be better, to confront all of my homophobia, sexism, and racism, but it's hard, because consciously I'm none of those things. So thank you, because this helps me see you and me more clearly.
It's really nice to hear that. The maturity you showed is unfortunately rare these days
IM THE OPPOSITE OF ALL OF THOSE SO THATS FANTASTIC TO HEAR!
+PastelSkitty he addressed racism in his comment so he clarified that he's white.
Maddy Smith ur point is?
I think it was just more of a perspective thing, if that makes sense.
"I dare you to step inside my rainbow converse"
This makes me so happy! I always wondered how people can think stuff like "I don't want to be bombarded by your sexuality" I can't help but think "what if I said, "oh your sexual orientation is offencive to me. I'm so tired of seeing a guy make out with a girl, stop shoving it in my face! I get it your straight" can u even imagen the reactions if a gay person said that!? this is really powerful!
" yes, I'm gay. But no, you don't get it"
Do you know what people like you and bible thumpers have in common you're the only ones that makes a big deal about sexuality. No one gives a shit if you are straight or gay.
Whette Fahrtz That's actually not even kinda true. Mater of fact the amount of kids in high school who get the shit beat out of them when they come out as being gay proves you wrong. But i wish you were right. However your not right.
+Whette Fahrtz Do you hate facts? The discrimination LGBT people face in this country alone - and don't even get me started on other countries - is well documented and not even close to gone. You are exactly who this poem is addressed to. Say what you said to the people who get beaten for who they are, the ones who get raped to 'turn' them, the ones who are murdered because someone decided it would be better if they were dead. Say that to the people who get fired, are denied housing, are kicked out of their families. The kids who are bullied into killing themselves. Trust me. Lots of people give a shit.
Whette Fahrtz there is so very much wrong with what you just said. And not all Christians all "bible thumpers". I am a Christian and not only am I not against homosexuality but I'm a huge lbgtq+ supporter and that's because if you actually read the Bible you'll see that is not a damn thing wrong with homosexuality God loves variety and he always has. The Bible teaches love, screwed up people teaches hate and use the Bible to do it. And just because I'm not against homosexuality doesn't mean I can't understand the other side of it and why Christians think that it's wrong. Stop with the one way tolerance. Also , telling people that their pain isn't real and that it doesn't happen and it's in the head and they're making a big deal out of it... that's it is f***** up. Don't pull that s***, because you don't know who you're affecting. I hope something changes you're very messed up you on life, because you are the problem. Saying that it's not a big deal and homofobia isn't still a big problem, doesn't make it go away you just make it worse.
So maybe think before you attack one group and Patronize another. I'll pray for you.
Emily Corneail ya, we both watched the video
Whenever I see a girl who just goes on and on about her boyfriend and kisses him all the time in front of everyone, I should just say, "We get it, you're straight. You don't need to shove it on my face."
Miss Adjusted my friends always talk about boys and shit and none of them know im pans and they always ask me if i have a crush on any of the boys and id always make up crushes to them so i would seem normal
Well (most) straight people don't go rubbing their sexuality in other people's face.
Some gay people just can't shut up that they're gay because they've got nothing else about them that's interesting.
If you're a person, you should be given respect.
Ashley Mardell for president.
I would vote for her!!
Amazing video amazing person. Qualified? No. Voting for people on their beliefs and not their political and economic knowledge?That's how we get crappy presidents. She's doing her job by bringing awareness to people who then vote for who they want with the information's shes given them. I support that. Ashley Mardell for enlightening our country!
hey, it was a joke :(
Oh i know but i needed something to do to distract me from my headache
I'd move to America and register as a citizen JUST to vote for her
Oh the assonance.....alliteration....rhyming..the delivery and overall message, your a wizard, truly. A 'poem-smith', an artist, a lyrical genius.................. an inspiration. My inspiration.
i really wish i could just show this video and your last poetry video to everyone.
You can 💗
Probably the only video I have ever done the whole nine yards on (Liked, favorited, subscribed) You're amazing, keep doing you.
DarrenShade welcome to the fam!
+Ashley Mardell I can't tell you how much I love this video. It is literally my favorite video on the entire internet, my favorite video in the world. I watch this daily and cry over it when I feel just like this because I connect to this and I get it. I am gay, I'm a lesbian and this happens to me so often to the point where sometimes I wish I didn't live in a world so uneducated. I can't express how much I love you for making these videos how much time and effort you put into them and I wanted to tell you that I and thousands of other people feel the same way as me about your videos. Don't ever take anybody's shit and continue doing what you love. You inspire me and leave me empathetic and leave me thinking constantly about the injustice we face and what I can do to change our world. I love you.
+Ashley Mardell I found you because UA-cam suggested your 'I got a tattoo' vid (I loved it !) and I´m really happy about it. Now I am really addicted to your vids and I have to say that this vid here is my fav so far. I love how you stand up for what you are and for other people (sry for my english xD) Just keep doin what you doin! XO :)
This hit me hard Ashley, literally feel so upset about those awful comments right now. Don't let those people bring you down, do what you your doing to help people out. I'm so amazed by the way you speak and basically this entire video was done in one take! Beautiful video Ashley :)
my friend just linked this to me saying about how he's on the verge of crying because of how relatable this is...
you are amazing and I'm definitely adding this to favorites. for what it's worth, I'm sorry you have to put up with the bullshit everyday of your life.
Every time I feel down or outcasted due to my sexuality I watch this video through and almost always feel better. Thank you Ashley for your artistic beauty!
this has literally brought me to tears I love your flow and word-play I write too its pretty hectic pls dont ever change
This was the first vid I watched of you. It made me cry. Thank you so much. I'm still confused about my sexuality. I don't know what to do. But I'll get through it, thanks to you Ashley. Thank you. You probably won't comment on this (no one else ever has) but that's okay. I hope you live a happy life.
i was confused of my sexuality too! I found out about 5 months after i turned eleven, (two months ago) Im bisexual, also if you don't the genders here is a list of them:
Bisexual: you like both genders
Straight: you like the opposite gender
Gay: You like the same gender
Lesbian you like the same gender (more refered to girls)
also, there's asexual which means without sexual feelings or emotions (there's also more but i don't know all of them plus it be too long to explain all of them)
Thanks. I still haven't found out yet.
its okay! You can always always ask me anything and ill help as best as i can!
+Fernygaming Although there are more sexualities and more layers to the spectrum I'm glad your trying to help and to the top comment I suggest you research and I hope you have success finding something that fits you! Good luck :D
This was so powerful, and so eloquent. Not only did you make your point so clearly, but you did so in a well thought out poem. This is a work of art as well as a necessary message for everyone. I cried.
The fact that I can see twelve or more heterosexual relationships on a single television programme and almost never find one makes me want to tear my hair out and scream. And then when I find one-- just one show, out of a thousand, with some vague representation, it's hardly ever hashed out- it's hardly ever as detailed as the others, it's hardly ever as romantic or as healthy or as interesting as the others.
And when there's ever more than one lgbt character, people say it's only catering to the gay agenda. As if. I don't complain every time I see a straight couple, I don't complain every single moment I look at UA-cam thumbnails and advertisements and newspaper ads and the news on the TV and shows and in books and magazines and in school and every sort of digital media, I don't complain whenever I overhear someone- or everyone- talking about their opposite-sex partner.
But the moment there is significant representation, I've somehow rubbed them the wrong way. As if. As if I'm not already shaking at the mere mention of my sexuality because I know that if I tell the wrong person and the word gets out, I have no idea where my life could go. As if I'm not already biting my tongue, hesitating to mention who I really am even in a passing, polite conversation to a close friend, for the simple reason of I'm afraid to lose them-- no matter how many personal details they've given to me about their own relationship.
As if I'm not already crying because I have a homophobic father who would either kill me or kick me out of the house if he found out about a simple part of me that I can't change, no matter how much I've tried.
As if I'm not already uneasy about any conversation pertaining to my orientation. As if I'm not already terrified.
And when I do...
THAT'S when I'm "too gay". For mentioning my crush, or the mere fact that it exists.
I'm gay.
And the only reason I've ever learned to accept this passing fact about myself is because I had a close friend who taught me that I am more than my father and I am more than the idea that he put on me, that society put on me. I had a close friend who killed herself because her parents wouldn't accept her for who she was either, I had a close friend who made me realize I was gay and was ripped apart from me not a week later because her own family found out.
But if you're straight you never had to learn the passing fact about yourself. Because everyone had already drilled it in you. But they drilled it in me, too, even though that's in no world the way I am.
I can't even say it aloud in the real world, I can only say it on the internet, where things are lost and preserved forever, because I would never even risk saying something so 'horrible', I would never risk having someone overhear my darkest, most hideous horrible secrets.
Something I'm not even ashamed of until someone asks about it. Ask me while I'm anonymous, and I'll tell you everything happily-- I'm gay, I'm homoromantic and I'm proud to be homoromantic and I'm proud to belong- albeit anonymously- to a community as diverse and supportive as the LGBTQ+ community.
Ask me in person, and I'll begin trembling, I'll lose my voice and I won't meet your eye. I'll shut my mouth and I won't say a word.
If you're cisgender and straight, that's great.
But appreciate the fact that you will never have to come out, that you will never be refused service for who you are and who you choose to love. Appreciate the fact that your marriage won't be a "gay marriage", it'll just be a (real) marriage. The real mirage is the idea that somehow those two things are different, that somehow gender and sex determine legitimacy.
Jesus. I'm just ranting.
Great
Wow
its been two years since you posted this i hope your situation is getting or is already better
Fiercely powerful. Well done. I'm sorry that straight people do this. I am sorry for everytime I've done this without realising. Xxx
Not in the same way...but as an ace....i totally feel this.....
Me too
I would suggest you to watch her series about the Ace spectrum.
already watched it several times, but thanks :)
honestly the only representation i can find for ace people is todd from bojack horseman, and that's only addressed towards the end of season 3. I wish there was more representation for it.
kohiinu lord varis (don't know if I spelled that right) from game of thrones is ace.
YOUR GOING TO MAKE ME CRY AND IM NOT EVEN ON THE SCHOOL BUS YET
That's really touching and upsetting. I've been contemplating how to be a better ally to the gay community, so this is thought provoking.
John Thunder ha, ur funny
John Thunder Oh look, someone drank the kool aid... There is nothing satanic about the rainbow flag, or homosexuality. If someone else's sexuality makes you feel oookie, that is your business, but that doesn't make them wrong, doesn't make them satan spawn, and doesn't mean that 99.999% of anyone agrees with you. Go away you sad little troll.
John Thunder I can't trust someone that can't even use the "%" symbol...
SimplyMayaBeauty That's awesome! Being reflective and self aware is the first step. You already seem like an awesome ally to me :)
Thank you Ashley!
i love this. i revisit this video every once in a while because it really affects me. i am pan and often feel invalidated, but as a member of the lgbtq+ community i am a part of this and i understand what it means to be gay. this poem is my everyday inner struggle and i love it so much.
Me too! Just thought i would spread love to a fellow middle spectrum viewer 😊
Me too! Just showing that we ain't alone!
I am too pan. Glad to see someone else feels how I do about invalidation
You are incredible. This is moving and beautiful and SO important. Thank you.
Please don't stop your videos! As a mother of a daughter who had been repeatedly torn down by her peers for her differences, you are an inspiration for her and myself. I only wish I had found a way through all the peer expectations as well you have. Know that you have changed lives!!! We live in the Twin Cities and I can't tell you what it would mean for a chance to meet you.
You are really an incredibly talented artist. I find your way with words just amazing, and your expressiveness when speaking is breathtaking. Never stop writing, never stop posting videos.
Breathtakingly beautiful. Being gay, I completely understand and relate. You gave me an interesting perspective. Instead of thinking like I'm "too gay" I could think that everyone around me is "too straight" and I really am so about that.
PLAY THIS IN SCHOOLS EVERYWHERE
Especially in my school! Someone get some representation up in here my friends need to see this!
yes
+AgDeer yess
OMG YUS PLEASE
they played this in my school to all the middle schoolers :)
I know this is an older video, and this happened a long time ago. But I just wanted you, Ash Hardell, to know that you ARE a positive and needed voice for the LGBT youth, and beyond.I discovered you through a video the SuperCarlinBrothers did with you. I decided to check out your channel, and I got hooked. Since that day, about a couple days ago, I have been able to further my understanding of my own sexuality, along with others. I am a mix of a couple different sexualities, which is confusing, but I feel like it fits me the best. Thank you, for teaching me, and countless others, about sexuality and gender. You are valuable, and needed, and an amazing human being.
Nah she's pretty crazy nowadays
I always come back to this video. so many feels.
My dear wonderful and precious Ashley, I can't even begin to tell you how much I needed this today. A friend told me earlier about how many people in my class are talking behind my back that I am "behaving too gay" and such.
So, when I saw your video title I was like: Oh...is she gonna tell me to just shut the hell up, because I'm just some 'baby-dyke' ? But then I watched it and it was just so wonderful to hear what you said, you really gave me hope and strength to just be myself and not let them make me cover up who I am.
So...thank you a lot, this was so very needed.
:*
This is a work of art and pretty much sums up the gay struggle.
Nathan Orcutt #preach
Every time someone says to me "you're gay we get it" or my mom tells me that I don't need to "announce to the world" that I'm gay cause according to her I'm not, I rewatch this video over and over until I realize it's not my fault I am who I am. Ash, you have no idea how much this video is a life saver to me.
I honestly own a pair of literal rainbow converse 😂
I wish my mom could see this. And my sister. While my mom simply thinks you don't "know til your older and you shouldn't label yourself Julia the girl who wanted to go out with you and you said yes to was just trying to manipulate you." Except now she refuses to even acknowledge she was a girl she just says "that .... Person who I made you not date." I'm 18 now , it's not like I'm a little middle school kid and even kids that young know, I did in a way, I just didn't process it. My sister on the other hand is the one who complains about other girls being gay and thinks they're gonna hit on her cause one girl said she's cute( said girl has a girlfriend , ALL THE GIRLS IN HER GRADE TALK LIKE THAT not to mention she never messaged my sister privately or anything.) but then she prances around say that "omg I need a GBF! I need one in college!" But then tells me I "can't date a girl or be gay cause I was with a boy once." And gets annoyed if I say there's possibly no than the stereotypical
(Cont) gay kid. We were watching glee the other day , and the one gay character , who's her stereotype dream, is invited to join this club at his college. It was one of the many musical clubs, and all the people or most of them looked stereotypically "queer." I had not seen that episode in so long I forgot what the club was, and suggested it was possibly a lgbt music kinda club. To which she responds "ugh why does everything have to be gay!" Another example is I watch Stevens universe, and incredibly LGBT inclusive kids show, with excellent representation of queer women. Now we have one canon girl and girl pairing, one canon unrequited love between two female characters although ones dead, she's still getting over the death of her love. Now there are other characters hinted at being with each other often throughout the show, and if I bring it up I get "ugh Julia why do yo have to make it gay can't they just be friends we already have Ruby and Sapphire!!" I hope she gets more accepting
julia oneill aka fuck off ginger
julia oneill My god, my mom practically says the same thing!!!! "It takes a while to figure this stiff out, and I hate the lables"
Jeez that's all she can talk about now days, labels.
julia oneill ash also talks about this in her video about someone saying that she is "Not Gay Enough"- that's the title
This is beautiful. I teared up during this.
"We get it, you're gay."
"No, you don't get it."
I AM SO SORRY. After seeing this I literally started crying. You are so amazing. I am a woman, and even though I am straight I face tons of discrimination, and I talk about it. The whole time I was watching I was nodding, because I know EXACTLY what you are talking about. It's so easy for someone to say, "Okay, ENOUGH, I get it," when really, they will never get it. I wish that society was different, and that it wasn't so hard for people to be themselves. I wish that so much. But you do such an amazing job. You're bubbly and enthusiastic and gushing with pride, and I could not be happier for you. I just know you're changing hearts with every video. Thank you so much for being an inspiration in my life.
YOU, GIRL, MY FRIEND
YOU
ARE
FUCKING
AMAZING
words can't express how much respect I feel for you. from the bottom of my heart, I admire you.
I am aro/ace and I think this speaks to most lgbt+ people, thank you for making this
"Ok, we get it, your homophobic" is what I would reply to them with
+Hanna Jane If I only ever talked about being from Ohio, and people got sick of it. Does that make them Ohioaphobes, or does that make me boring and uninsightful?
+spider milk Does anyone slander you repeatedly or ask you invasive questions about living in Ohio? "Wow, Ohio? That's rough." "How do you have Ohio sex?" "What's it like to live in the most underrepresented state in America?" "When will people who live in Ohio be allowed to get married?" No? Then you must realize it's not the same thing at all. When you compare a tragic and annoying phenomenon like being told you're "too gay" to something as mundane and normalized as living in Ohio, you miss the entire point of this video.
Sierra Maitland People ask you how lesbians have sex? Yeah you're up there with Rosa Parks. XD
Sierra Maitland I went to school in a super poor, drug addicted area. I was a weak, goofy kid, and the kids with shitty druggy parents would beat the shit out of me, daily. I got sent to the hospital once. I learned how to carry my self before high school, and quit bitching. It stopped. I'm kind of glad it happened. I've never mentioned it to my friends, because I've always had other things to talk about. Never considered it that tragic really. I see so many people go through so much more. Yet I see kids wear so much less as a crucifix. Being hurt by every little petty thing has too make life unbearable. How the fuck can you even enjoy life, when being asked a misinformed question is such a fucking traumatic experience for you?
+Hanna Jane I wouldn't say anyone who says "We get it, you're gay" is necessarily homophobic, but most definitely showcasing their privilege. As is anyone comparing being part of the LGBTQ+ community to being from Ohio. **cough**
THIS IS AWESOME! YOU ARE AWESOME! Also, I want to add : as a young teenager I hate when adults say"there shouldn't be so much representation of gay people in the internet, because kids and young people will think it's a trend" like, I can't really say anything about non-heterosexual people to some adults without them saying "oh my god you young kids have trends, I am sure most of them aren't actually gay/pan/ace/etc They are just saying it fir attention" like, no? Why can't someone be gay without wanting attention!!!?
There's no quota, there's ignorance
And all high school's indifference
May lead to these discriminations
We are still people of thy nations
What makes us different from those who resent
Is being forced out to represent
Asked "what it's like to be gay"
"Well, the same as people feel on Monday"
Just because we orientate differently
It doesn't mean we feel differently
Our sexuality feels as natural as yours
The only difference is we band for protection
And we are only just being recognised by law
So go ahead, act like we're lucky
Why don't you tell that to kids who are jumpy
Because they were mugged for being gay
"But at least you're not trans." Horray
Because that topic is so different
And you wonder why
Lesbian
Gay
Bisexual
Transsexual
Unite
When you straight folk go give us a fright
So go ahead. Push me. I might just fall
When you learn my bi secret step back or I'll roar
Else my limp body just might float to shore.
this is one of the greatest things i've ever seen.
This video really spoke to me. I could go on and on about its importance, but I'll just talk about one point that means a lot to me. The lack of representation of the lgbtq+ community in media really annoys me. I'm asexual and despite searching I've only come across a couple of texts with asexual characters, and none of them are mainstream. Its really disheartening, as representation can be crucial in helping youth work out who they are. Personally, seeing an ace character in the indie webcomic Rain was a turning point for understanding myself - it was so important, I can barely begin to describe how much it meant.
same here! that sense of othering is hard to escape even within the LGBT+ community because there's very sexual stuff everywhere. I might have to check out that comic though!
AnonymousDalek If you like fantasy books, then I'd really recommend Clariel by Garth Nix - the protagonist is asexual (like, very very obviously asexual - I asked the author, when he did a Q&A, and he confirmed that she is), and the book is part of a pretty popular series called the Old Kingdom series. It's really well written and I'd recommend it even if you weren't searching for representation :)
Yes! That book is actually on a (really long) list of books I need to read.
I'm ace too (and panromantic so hoo boy double whammy of ORIENTATIONS THAT TOTALLY DONT EXIST), and my god I know this feeling so well. Seeing ace characters in media being good, kind, valued individuals sometimes makes me cry. It's so, so important.
AnonymousDalek I can't resist saying this. Maybe you're not into anime/manga at all so you don't even need to reply or acknowledge this comment, but most people agree that the main character of One Piece is asexual. It's never outright stated that he's ace but he's never shown an ounce of attraction to anyone (in 790 chapters), even if a beautiful woman stands naked in front of him. He's completely indifferent to sex and attraction of any kind, even when other characters get nosebleeds left and right. Considering it's the highest selling manga of all time (and just got into Guinness World Records, too) it's really nice to see.
There's some debate around the topic because a lot of fans want him paired off with different people and refuse to accept that he's ace but in my mind, and the mind of most die-hard fans, he obviously is, and I think if you're looking for more media that shows asexual characters, you could always read One Piece. Luffy, the main character, in no way needs to have sex/romance involved to be one of the most hilarious, strong, and inspiring characters of all time and his complete lack of interest in the topic is never mocked or even mentioned by his crew (he's a pirate captain, I should mention).
As a nice bonus, it's probably one of the greatest stories ever told.
I can, in some way relate to this. I'm bi and I sometimes talk about a new girl crush that I have and my brother will yell "Oh my gosh, we get it! Stop talking about her!" and so I don't want to talk about it anymore and my parents ask why I'm not more open about that stuff. It's because almost every time, I'm shamed for it.
"partners in crime by fighting off the fellows right?!" xD. Dayum
Every video of yours is amazing. Everything from the editing, to the content, to your personality and everything in between makes me not able to wait for a new video. Keep it up
Wonderful job! I'm right now doing my MA thesis on the misrepresentations of bisexuality on two TV shows (Torchwood and Orange is the New Black) and it's incredible the amount of misunderstandings, dismissals and ignorance among the public and even the critics I'm quoting from. Thanks for speaking up for the community, we need voices like yours. If the gay community is invisible, try the bisexual community... incredible.
Memelovescaps I went on a class trip somewhere a few days after the first episode of torchwood where Ianto and Jack kissed. One of the teachers complained to the class about how "Just because it was past the watershed doesn't mean they have to show to guys kissing" Like it was somehow Worse than a full nude heterosexual sex scene.
Memelovescaps I'd love to know your thoughts on this. I am bisexual too and hate the lack of media representation. Especially when CHAPMAN IS CLEARLY BISEXUAL and its meant to be 'an amazing LGBT' show especially with laverne cox and all and i do love the show but wow does it piss me off that they dont say it!
am oh yes, the fact that the word BI only appears once in 26 episodes and not in a very positive context is a huge topic in my dissertation. Also the fact that the rest of the characters talk about "go back to being gay", as if it's an "either/or" option and you have to be either one gay or straight, with no in-between. I defend, however, that Chapman is putting a somewhat resistance to this system, although she isn't as vocal as she should... but yeah, it pisses me of as well that they don't categorize her as bisexual when she clearly is, while there's no problem in categorizing her as "former lesbian girl" and several other categorizations that don't make any sense...
Bogwedgle Indeed, it's like what Ashley says in this video that straight say "I'm not in the mood for a gay bar" EXCUSE ME? Do I ever say "I'm not in the mood" when I go to a non-gay bar? Do straight people have to be "in the mood" to go to a "straight" bar? Or do they simply walk into a bar? This is just getting silly...
And the same goes for Jack and Ianto's kiss, it simply should be categorized as a romantic or sexual kiss, not as a gay kiss... besides, neither of them is gay anyways, so why it should be called gay kiss? I get very frustrated when I have to analyse things like these LOL
THANK YOU, thank you for standing up for me while i have an invalid voice, as i was removed from school for the bullies and as i was kicked out of my home for coming out, thank you for being here and i know you wont really see this but thank you for saying theses words that help me feel free in my own body even thought i am hated and locked in a key-less box i know your words will break my box and free me to be who i am
6:13
"Those who matter don't mind, those who mind don't matter."
Dr. Suess.
I know it is easy for me to say this, but it is important to keep in mind.
this was beautiful. this is kind of how i feel when i see comments online that say "stop talking about race" or " stop making ( insert black youth killed here ) about race ". we want no pity party I'm not one to draw attention to myself. we talk about our race cause we have to. obviously i will never understand your personal struggle cause I'm straight but i really enjoyed watching it and seeing the passion in your eyes. never stop talking cause you're helping a lot of people with your videos.
Livi's Vlog You're not even "making" it about race. You're acknowledging that something is about race, and others are blind to that. KEEP TALKING ABOUT IT LADY! :)
Exactly! It's people like you that inspire me to keep talking !
To the people who say " i get why there was one parade for lgbt, but one every year? Why? I dont get praised for being straight" look at it this way: you dont need to be praised. I put my friends and family on the line when i come out to people close to me. I get praised for having the guts to do it. You arent going to be terrorized for being straight. But somehow i am terrorized fo loving someone that is put into the same gender group as me. Whats sad is if ash's girlfriend was a boy, they would not be refused service in resteraunts, or constantly reminded that in this day and age, they will never be the the same as the usuals. The straights. But lets get this straight: in a world full of hatred everyone should be allowed to love, and yet, were not
I love this ✊🏾🏳️🌈
This is my favourite poem ever. Once in a while I always come back to listen to it. Thanks Ash, as always.
And these videos are the reason I subscribed in the first place. Thank you
I considered myself quite in tune with my sexuality and my struggles as a gay woman until I watched this video. I thought that while I had adversity here and there, that overall it wasn't so bad because my family, while disapproving, didn't completely disown me. Or that I have never been physically beaten for my sexuality. But you've made me think about the struggles I face every day, every hour, that I've become so accustomed to, I consider normal. That my mom has called every girlfriend I've ever had (for the past 9 years) my "friend" because it makes HER uncomfortable to acknowledge her daughter has a girlfriend. That every picture post on social media of me and my girlfriend that might even hint to others that we are anything but friends is kind of risqué and I'm being a little defiant every time. That twinge of anxiety every time I meet a new person who gives me even the slightest of strange looks because I wonder "do they suspect? What do they think?" The incessant questioning by my grandmother if I think this boy or that boy is cute. She just flat out refusal to acknowledge that gay IS an orientation and that my relationship is not only valid, it's not a spectacle or a gimmick or a way to get attention or a bandaid to a larger problem. It's just love. Thank you for reminding me that even myself, an aware homosexual, has allowed myself to normalize discrimination.
***** "Thank you for reminding me that even myself, an aware homosexual, has allowed myself to normalize discrimination." BOOM. You got it :)
You're wonderful and this poem was VERY beautiful
Definitely my favourite video and poem! It helped me so much because I often had the feeling that everything I am going to say might be "too gay" and annoying for my friends which are mostly heterosexual. But with the help of the poem I recognized that I can say everything which is on my mind. I am a lesbian and that's leads too the fact that the things I say often "point out my queerness". Just like my friends point out there heterosexuality through their talks.
Thank you for this beautiful poem and the message of it.
Best Greetings from Germany! :)
This is fucking incredible Ashley. I'd be surprised if this doesn't blow up.
marinashutup
i love this as a bisexual its so true what people do. they think they can push us around and keep us down. but this is evidence that they cant. keep doing what your doing. and I hope I can be as proud of my sexuality as you are
I am forced to face my gay every time gay is mentioned anywhere and my parents look at me with an "Oh. That's one of her kind" expression on their faces.
I am forced to face my gay when my friend thinks she's being nice and posts a pro-gay post on Instagram and tags me in it and when she sends me every post on Instagram every story on tumblr every video on UA-cam even mentioning gays. I didn't ask for this "othering" for this calling out and reminder that this story or post or video is different from the others because the person who made it is proud to be who they are.
Thank you Ashley for this amazing video, I can't tell you how many times I've watched it. It sums up everything I feel all the time. It's good to know that we are not alone.
I adore this video. I've watched it so many times now and it still gets to me. I haven't cried yet but I still feel quite strongly about this. I want this video to be shown to as many people as possible, so I recommended it to the Fine Brothers react channel. Please please please if anyone reads this, make sure that the Fine Brothers see this video. It needs to be shared to more and more people.
Thank You.
I'm A Black 12yr Old Genderqueer Gay Female.
Many Issues So, This Helps
Ingrid Odé TigequgestrawomalamanattsnakanbeavevyothrFriofmonth. If you don't memorize that and pronounce it perfectly every time you refer to me I'll have you charged with a hate crime. Those are my rights as a typical university student.
Mayha Waddy and I I see you like HOMESTUCK if I'm not mistaken...
What are you stupid? It's tigequgestrawomalamanattskakabeavevyothrFriofmonth. It's not that hard. Get it perfect next time or you are automatically equal to a member of the KKK.
kids these days...
? How can you be 9 and CONVINCED you are gay, like wtf grow some balls first. Proves that kids think it's now 'cool' to be gay...
My comment was not meant to hurt you but i'd rather say it how it is (in my opinion)
Thank you.
I am transgender AND *drumroll* GAY!
I know...I know. Double trouble. Yet my parents don't get it.
Don't accept it. My mother won't give up on having a daughter eventhough she never had one to begin with (I have a brother so...that makes two sons.) Sorry, mom, but... I'm not sorry.
Anyway, I do hope people get it one day, so we could all just FUCKING LIVE OUR LIVES LIKE EVERY FUCKING OTHER PERSON!
yo I totally feel u my mother has wanted a sweet little girly girl since I was accidentally given life but hah nope she ended up with this weirdo gay sassafras teen who always tries to make it up to her, the worst part is I haven't come out about being a lesbian yet and she already hates me. but it's ok cause my friends are either gay too or super don't care which is all that matters.
I love this! People need to realize that gender, sexuality and romantic feelings are 3 separate ideas.😊
I hope your mother will someday understand what being transgender means because obviously she doesn't
what r u fking, gay?
+LotsOGames yes and transgender, as he said
I watched this video in front of my mom and she said "If it's that hard just don't be gay" as if it's just some new thing that people my age are doing
I don't know who you are but you have such great presence and really got me thinking. You definitely deserve more subscribers. You have such a beautiful soul.
I get stuff like this from my mum. A passing mention of my sexuality or the sexuality of the LGBTQA characters that i'm happy exist, caused her to reply "alright you're bi. Enough." She says she's not homophobic and that she doesn't care about my sexuality, but I WANT her to care. Because saying she doesn't care is like saying "I can ignore it." She doesn't see how i crumble with each passing homophobic comment she says. I still feel like she thinks I'm "going through a phase" that one day i'll wake up and suddenly realise "oh silly me i guess i wasn't bi after all".
ThePsychomegify Yeah, her caring is one thing but her active support is another.
+Jj Nelson what this persons mother is doing is completely disregarding the feelings of their own child. And you're right that is is one thing, but she should actively support them regardlessly.
SAME AS MY DAD TBH AHHH SOBS
***** sure
Thank you for making this. Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you
I love this poem, even though I wish we lived in a world where these problems didn't exist it's still nice to know there are others who feel the same.
Wow. I almost cried because that reminded me of myself. Your channel has helped me realise so many things about myself that i probably would have kept hidden away. You and your channel mean so much to me, and that was absolutely beautiful.
YOU'RE SO GREAT AND SO SMART I LOVE YOU
You've got an iron will to keep being honest. Most days, I just keep my mouth shut. Every time I've tried to talk about my orientation no one ever believes me because apparently I'm "too pretty." All gay people look the same, right? Ugh.
Thank you for this. It explains it all. My friends don't get it so I sent them this. I hope they watched it. Because it hurts and they don't know it and know they are doing it.
Ashley, just, yes. Thank you. For making this video and saying these things. You got me very emotional. I rlly liked this video. Plz keep doing what you are doing, being happy.
XOXO
Keep on taken the medication, through time we will all be cured, Genetics is a wonderful tool. LOL
yeah gurl!!! some human are like that.. they say their opinions out loud which is so GRRRRR.. you rock!
Wow, I am speechless. Everything I have ever wanted to say was just born in front of me.
SO IS THIS GIRL A HATER OR NAH
WWE DIVAS Watch it then ask?!?!?!
Ashley Mardell Coming from a straight male who has been subbed to your chan pre-Grace (i been on a couple google hangouts w u) I will be honest, I was considering an unsubscribe, and not because I have anything against you, but due to the lack of videos I can relate to. You can understand my reasoning for that. However, watching this gave me a new insight on you and your videos, which I will continue to watch and stay subbed to your chan. You are very intellectual, and are a great entertainer. Keep up the great work Ashley, and I will stay a loyal fan :) Cheers!
Jon Bianco :)
4 words: this video is beutiful
*beautiful god that's embarrassing
Andrew Kolotyliuk OMFG SO MUCH FOURS.
Thank you Ash.. You've really touched our hearts..