HOLY MOLY. Watch the whole thing to understand why I made this choice and exactly how (ECSTATIC) it makes me feel. This vid has everything; the good, bad, ugly, and all the love that top surgery has given me. I hope you enjoy :)
I follow you on Instagram so I got to see some of it! I also have some of my own dysphoria so I tend to shy away from top surgery videos. But I’m super happy for you!
I have been subscribed to your channel for a long time now. Like... since before you and Grace met. I've never commented on any of your videos until today. I just wanted to say that I am incredibly proud of you and your journey. You are an inspiration to so many people, myself included. You deserve nothing but the best! You look awesome! Thank you for being courageous enough to be your authentic self. Thank you for letting us be a part of it. Sending nothing but love your way.
@@yaoifever2379 understandable, surgery is scary. Do what feels right for you, and talk to a professional about your fear. They know what they're doing and they might be able to help you move past it.
I am very glad that Ash has made their decent from sweat shirt to human. That’s what this series was all about, right? Glad their transition went well.
Ash you look amazing! I’m a straight, disabled mum vlogger to a 4 and a half year old.. your content is nothing like I’d normally watch but I’ve shared your channel with so many others because I think you’re so brave, honest & genuine. Never change. Xx
I don't know why but it was SUPER hard for me to see Ash crying. I felt like I was watching a really good friend cry and I couldn't reach out and hug them and I hated it. I'm glad they added the cute video Grace made later though, it made me feel better to see Ash getting all the support they deserve. Congratulations Ash! I hope you're feeling 100%!
Emma Johnson, thank you for clarifying my comment, you're correct. But I believe Hobart was referring to a reply above that said "he/she/it", which is indeed wrong and a horrible thing to say, but that person is just trying to be inflammatory so there's probably very little point in arguing with them.
I feel kinda dumb admitting this since I don't know you irl, but I cried a little out of happiness for you. It's so awesome seeing someone get to live a happier, healthier life and that surprise video from Grace (and Grace in general) was amazing. Congratulations!!!
I cried! When I saw @uppercaseCHASE1 and Aaron and all the love, I teared up. Ash! You look so amazing and so happy and I'm so happy for you! Fuck the haters, you made the absolute right decision!!
Queen Quenepa LOL. Ok. I don't usually comment because there is just no point, but it's so funny how you went on Ash channel to pick on Chase about his own personal self-doubts and stuff and call it misogyny. That's so unrelated, uncalled for, unneeded and inapropriate.
uppercaseCHASE1 this is only my second comment on UA-cam ever but I had to...chase, don’t let what this person says get to you. Clearly, they don’t know you. I thank you for putting yourself out there, even if it means having to deal with comments like this. 💚
Hi Ash, my child has recently come out as trans. I am 53 and have been very supportive of them for the last few years. They are talking about getting top surgery. I suggested that they wait a while. They have just started taking T and while I'm not upset, I am nervous. I think your videos will be helpful for me.
I’m so happy for you Ash, your chest looks so great. Thank you for sharing this, I’m sure it’ll help so many AFAB non-binary people with chest dysphoria who want to do the big chop but feel alone in a world of mostly binary transguys on T going through with it. :)
Kovu is a unicorn Hi Kovu! I agree. It must be really hard to go through with top surgery surrounded by binary trans guys on t and and some nb trans people on t. I'm so happy for them!
As a trans masculine non-binary person seeing this makes me really excited about when I eventually get top surgery Update/ edit: i am one day post top surgery and I couldn’t be happier. To all the trans and non binary folks out there, I love you and I believe in you. Good things are coming so hang in there and keep believing in yourself ❤❤❤
I mean, I don't know much about top surgery so maybe this is more normal than I think, but they so clean and your scars seem so thin and small from others I have seen!? They've done a really good job
Ash is also very much a champ for doing so well at taking care of the scars, and people also sometimes just heal really well. My dad is diabetic and 69 years old and his scars from cardiac bypass surgery not quite 3 years ago are nearly invisible and that’s a really serious surgery with massive incisions
I dont see whats funny. I believe they stated that they were nonbinary. They dont feel comfy as either gender. Of course its the pronoun isnt a gender but its a more respectful to way describe them for who they are.
I was hoping you were gonna say, "It was a big weight off my chest" bc I live for puns lol sorry. I'M SO PROUD OF YOU, ASH!!!! This must've been so scary, I admire your courage. I think you're a great person deserving of all the love in the world. You are loved and valid.
Thank you so much Ash for sharing your story with us. The greatest gift anyone can ever give is their honest self and I feel like sharing your perspective, the ups and downs has been a wonderful gift for all of us who watch your channel and love and support you. Thank you for being you!
Jo Hammer hey Jo, you have a very interesting perspective. It sounds like you may have a vision of what a "pure body" looks like, but I'm not sure I would agree with your definition there. People make changes to their bodies all the time, whether it's permanent or temporary, and the purpose in most cases is to boost their own self confidence. That's partially why we get haircuts or nose jobs or braces or top surgery or wear makeup. You may also have a perspective that somehow people who make decisions for themselves are resulting in the degradation of society, I'm a firm believer in protecting the rights of the individual and standing up for people making decisions for themselves about who they are and what they want to be. I'm not sure if you're a collectivist and believe that people should follow social order, whatever it may say to maintain a sense of status quo but it sure does sound like you think in that way. All in all, we carry different perspectives but I would just like to know what your perspective is rooted in? My perspective is in loving yourself for who you are deep down inside, if changing your physical appearance helps you feel more comfortable displaying that and having it align with who you want to be, I'll support a person's right to do it. What is your perspective really rooted in? I don't ask to be sarcastic or rude, I would definitely love to talk to you about this. Maybe we can have a discussion and get a better understanding of each other here.
I think the comparison you draw is a non-comparable one. In the instance of changing your appearance with surgery, you are not putting yourself at risk for long-term potential harm. Anorexia does, it can lead to health issues and more. Would you make the same comparison for someone who gets breast implants or a nose job? You have to compare actions with similar results, to group in all behaviors doesn't help distinguish anything. My position is to support people's decisions to make changes in their life which will increase their well-being without leading to long-term physical harm. You also made the claim that my position is a relative one based on fads, trends, philosophies and a huge growing industry, etc. For that I would just say that you would have to provide evidence that the person is doing it for one of those reasons rather than just asserting it to be so. For example, if someone wants to get their ear lobes stretched out with ear gauges, I would support their right to do so if they feel like it's something they've thought through and want to do it because it will increase their sense of well being. You COULD make the argument that a person may be doing it because it's more fashionable and trendy right now, but that position doesn't really assert any claim because saying someone shouldn't do something because it's fashionable is not an argument.
I have never seen one of your vids before, but this one was on my "recommended" list, and I'm glad it was! Congrats on the top surgery - they did an excellent job, and you seem so thrilled, which is the most important thing. People are never going to be satisfied with the life choices anyone else makes. It's about YOU and what makes you happiest, because nobody else is going to life your life. I don't know why strangers feel the need to thrust their opinions into people's faces, but eh. Forget 'em. You're doing great. :)
I cried. Basically for the whole video. I told my bf and he just promised to do something like what Grace did for you and just. This wasn't even my journey and I was crying my eyes out. I'm so incredibly happy for you.
This is one of those rare long videos that I watched all the way through without skipping anything and I don't regret it at all. I'm so happy for you Ash! 💜💜💜💜
I’m sorry you have to deal with them regularly! I think the fact that your reaction is empathy really demonstrates an inherent goodness in your heart, I wish you all the best in dealing with your struggles
Watching u cry over the toilet brought back a lot of memories. I was there supporting my best friend through his top surgery and he was absolutely miserable
I am a trans boy and I want to get top and bottom surgery. But I don't know if my parents want me to until I'm 18 so I will just wait. I am so happy for you Ash !
Ash you look so beautiful and happy throughout this video and you’re my inspiration. As someone who has never quite conformed to gender roles and has known for a long time they were LGBT, seeing this and seeing you going out and leading your authentic life and just being true to yourself has inspired me to do the same. I’ve locked myself in the closet when it comes to certain people because they’ve never quite accepted me and I allowed them to believe who I am is just a phase or that I’ve been “confused”. Thank you Ash. Thank you so much.
Okay i have a real question though... so in general, men showing their nipples is “advertiser friendly”, but female boobs are not. So what about when someone is nonbinary? What are the rules based on? Gender or the size of boobs? Cause some men have larger ones and some women smaller.... what makes your naked top half suddenly not NSFW? Just my random thoughts... Congratulations Ash on the surgery ^^
lapeachMC I was thinking that. So before the surgery because ash still had boob fat...can’t be topless. Now that the fat was removed...ash can proudly be topless.
Alecia Chapin exactly!! Its quite bizarre tbh. And i even know for myself that seeing a more masculine top half of the body is like completely normal, but female boobs are instilled in me as something nsfw and something that should be covered up...
lapeachMC ikr, like I'm not saying I want to run around topless (personally), but why can men's chests be exposed while female boobs can't? I just can't seem to think of an awnser that makes sense
Boobs are age restricted, and flat chests are not. So idk... I think it doesn't have to do with the person's gender, just whether they have boobs or not, or whether or not they want to/can show their chest
@@robert_costello First of all Ash is their name so dont put it in parenthesis. Second they made the right decusions becuase it made them happy. And third, you can have your opinion but please keep it to yourself if you know its rude and/or offensive
Angelicelephant ! She mutilated her body and you expect me to embrace her with open arms? No! The only person that made the right decision, was her doctor. He saw a profit from this. And don’t tell me when to share my opinion, it’s protected by the Second Amendment and there is no such thing as hate speech.
This really just confirms my hope that I can get top surgery when I’m able to this was so cool to see this video it really does make me feel like getting top surgery is the right decision rather than putting up with the constant top dysphoria
I'M WRITING THIS AT 1 AM WHILE I'M GROUNDED FROM THE INTERNET BUT I'M A LITTLE SNEK AND STARTED BROWSING THE INTERNET AND SAW THIS VID. CONGRATS ASH!!!!!
I’m excited to have my boobs added instead of removed. I haven’t done anything at all as far as transitioning goes because i’m closeted, but I’m very exited to come out one day and be the girl I am, even if i’ll be six feet tall with broad shoulders
Kassandra M my cousin is a cis woman and she is six foot and is quite broad from all the sports she does it’s not that uncommon our advice ( mainly from her since I’m ftm )be careful about heels if you wish to wear them as some will make you look way taller than you actually are when wearing them wedges are good u know the ones with the cork bottoms stilettos with the platforms at the bottom add extra height ( she personally doesn’t like them but it’s everyone’s taste) hope we helped 😊
hugs from out of the closet :3 you can do it girl ! There'll be a day when it feels safe for you , and then it'll feel great to be able to be who you are out loud ^ w ^ and there's thousands of people just like you out there , and right here ^ w ^
I'm not tall but am a cis that sucks at heels: wedges are good and kitten heels are AWESOME because they still can be very cute and feminine or have pointed toes, but will be like, anywhere from 1/2 to 1 1/2 inches. Also, I'm excited for future-you to be the girl you are, as well Kassandra M!
Oh hon I wanted to reach through the screen and hug you when you were crying with pain. You did really good, I’m glad you’re so happy, and that you have so much support. I’m also glad you showed the messy emotional parts, cause I desperately want surgery in the future and I’m kinda nervous and it was reassuring
I live in a (in general) not-that-tolerant place, but I really think it's because of ignorance and not dislike or intentional rudeness. I wish everyone in this town would watch you tube videos like this one. I myself am "cis" (word I learned from UA-cam) and have never been friends with a out trans or gay person. Not because of my choice, just because people around here aren't out, or maybe just leave towns like this. Anyway, I feel so much more prepared for the day when I do have the chance to get to know a person who is not cis because of videos like this, and I don't see how the hate could continue if everyone had the chance to just learn about their fellow humans. Congrats on the successful surgery and keep up the great advocacy, Ash!
I’ve literally been watching your channel since you had long hair, and were living as a girl, THATS how long it’s been and ??? I’m so proud and happy for you
I know this video is over a year old now but I have watched this so many times and it makes me so happy every single time. It is so validating for me, a nonbinary person who doesn't want to start T. It was actually this video that made me realize that, hey, I can get top surgery too if I want! Anyways, thank you for being you and I am so happy for you still.
I am so freaking happy for you. You look great, it's very FLATTER-ing, as I knew it would be... (I already made that joke on an AshandGraceSPACE video but shhh) I think I probably want top surgery in the future. I love ya! 💕
Me: mom can i have a top surgery pls? My mom: WAIT ARE YOU TRANS? me: pfft of course not , i'm still a boy Mom: hunny you were a girl Me: oh Hate my "jokes"
I just am going to randomly say this. I was born female but am now realizing that I am an enby. I feel comfortable with he/him pronouns but am I not valid if I “look like a girl”.
@@ArtisanAsteroid I’m no pro but I think you’re totally valid just how you are. The LGBTQ+ community has a lot of different classifications. As long as your comfortable with yourself and who you are I think you can totally be “qualified” as enby. Like I’m (almost positive) that I’m trans (I was born female), but I don’t think I’ll ever fully ‘look’ like a male. I’d preferably use they/them or even she/her pronouns so I think it just matters that you’re comfortable. Again, I’m not a pro at this sort of stuff but I hope I helped somewhat (doubt it tho lol). Have a great day anyways!
I had a 5 minutes long ad on this video about visiting Oslo and the ad showed 3 people experiencing their first pride in Oslo. It was a great ad honestly.
I really struggle with internalised enby-phobia and every time I need some enby joy, I come to your videos. Thanks for all the sharing over the years, it's really helped me
Im not crying youre crying (Seriously though the fact that you have so many people that care for you and love you makes me incredibly happy. Chase and Alayna are my LOVES )
I really enjoy their channel because I have considered top surgery. Sometimes when I look in the mirror my breasts seem like they should not be there. I have tried out living with a male name, pronouns and clothes, and it quickly ended, cause it did not match. I do have very long hair, and feminine qualities, but I also have days where I bind, so I am not really one or the other and I think that is ok. But everytime I come to this channel, I have that relief of similarity to someone. Ash has shared some things I relate to, and for now that is enough for me.
I just teared up a little thinking about Ashley Mardell, who wanted all these things but didn’t know how to get to this moment. But you got here, Ash! You made it this far on your journey and I wish I could go back in time and tell “Ashley” that it’s going to be okay. ❤️ (Also, Grace is the most supportive wonderful human, wow)
Right? how COOL was Grace for being like "oh yeah cleaning drains are 100% my thing and I'm on it." Has Grace done this before for someone/medical field or just learned to help Ash?
It's 5 years ago I first found this video and now I'm watching this just a few days post op myself!!! (Trying to ignore the itchiness x_x) Life is wonderful and I want to thank you again for sharing your journey. Trans Joy is real ♡
Wow, Ash. I don't identify as trans but have seen tons of transition related videos, yet i don't think they have ever made me feel as overwhelmed with emotion as i am right now, just watching you discovering and celebrating your chest. I don't even know if it's because i relate in a way or if it's because you look so damn happy - but i totally just started crying. Mad respect, Ash! Also, props to Grace for being obviously awesome.
I'm been watching this video over and over I just wanna say... thank you, your positive energy is amazing and this video is giving me confidence and comfort to get top surgery. I've been scared to get it but I'm finally feeling excited for the future of when I do get it... thank you so much ash. You've helped me more than you know!!! 🙏😊
gosh, at the reveal i couldn't help but cry (the video that came before is kind of to blame, too, but shhh, its so sweet). im so, so happy for you!! you deserve every inch of it, ash, and it looks amazing 💞💞 you truly are super loved and super valid and super beautiful. congratulations. we're all so happy for you!!
I know this is like a year and a half late, but I am soooo happy for you Ash! I'm glad that you took that step and it made you so completely happy and relieved.
OMFG YAYYYYYYYYY FINALLY!!! I JUST CAME OUT TO MY FRIEND AS GENDERQUEER AND HE WANTED TO KNOW WHAT TOP SURGERY JUST AS I GOT THIS NOTIFICATION!!!!!!! LOVE BOTH OF YOU, YOU ARE VALID
Iris Macaulay well there’s only really girl, boy, or agender, and (actual) agender people are EXTREMELY rare. So, unless you have dysphoria, (which you would know by now if you did have it), you’re cis. Don’t make life harder for you than it has to be
Carter Cuntnugget first of all, I do have dysphoria, second of all, there are many more genders, just watch more of Ashes that he has. There's gender-fluid, non-binary, Etc.
Iris Macaulay yaaa that’s why I said there’s girl, boy, AND agender, just that agender, if it’s real, would be EXTREMELY rare. Genderfluid is made up. Speaking as a diagnosed trans guy, gender dysphoria is something that does not fluctuate to such an extremity that someone can be AFAB with “dysphoria” making them genderfluid, and be okay with being a girl one day. “Genderfluid” isn’t a gender. What you’re thinking about is GNC (gender non-conforming) meaning that someone’s style/fashion choices will vary from girly to manly depending on the day. I’m not trying to be mean, but honestly, after doing a lot of research, I take my opinions from scientists who live their lives researching this stuff. If you have any questions, please ask
Grace: we're on are waaaayyy to surgeeeeeerrrrryyyyy were so gaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyy Me: flips hair back and forth* U wanna here a joke call me shakesqueer lmao
Hey Ash. So, I've never really agreed with you on much, and I can't say that any of our viewpoints are similar. But I wanted to say that I'm really happy you're happy, and that regardless of our differing opinions I'm really glad for you. Keep doing you :)
Nicole Flynn You should seriously consider them. I didn't have actual migraines for about 2 years and if I did it was more like a fit of exhaustion than pain and nausea. If I get too stressed out from my triggers (light, sounds, etc) then the pain comes, but I can typically catch it by then and take medication. The piercings (I got both done) were honestly the best investment I've ever made and I reallllllly hope they work for you too, friend!
I'm watching this on Monday, after having my own surgery this past Friday, and I keep almost crying from joy and relief seeing and hearing someone else feeling so similar to me. I take my binder off the first time today, and this kind of muscle weakness always makes me feel nauseous. I never thought I'd get here. And this video, when you first posted it, helped me realize I needed it to begin with. Thank you, Ash.
crying at graces vid and all ur lovely friends :””””)
ALSO CONGRATS
U LOOK AWESOMEEEEEEE
DODIE!!! HEY HEY HEY 💛
AAAA ITS DODIE ❤️❤️❤️
hey dodie didn't expect to find you here :D
also I totally agree with you, Ash looks awesome
HOLY MOLY. Watch the whole thing to understand why I made this choice and exactly how (ECSTATIC) it makes me feel. This vid has everything; the good, bad, ugly, and all the love that top surgery has given me. I hope you enjoy :)
Ash Hardell omg you so lucky
SO SO SO SO HAPPY FOR YOU!! 💕
Ash Hardell UR MY ROLE MODEL!!
I loved the video, I'm so happy you made it :)
I follow you on Instagram so I got to see some of it! I also have some of my own dysphoria so I tend to shy away from top surgery videos. But I’m super happy for you!
Your results are INCREDIBLE
Noah!! You are awesome:) you and ash need to collab sometime
I know right
I bet you cant wait for yours!
Ily noah!
Ok yes i need the collab!!
“Please enjoy this emotional montage of everything that led up to it”
*Add starts playing*
That happened to me lol
I know right-
I don't have adds :)
So it happened to just about everyone then?
same.
It's crazy because a lot of the time I see this huge difference but with you it's just exactly how I always saw you.
Ollie Shrum AWWWWWWW OMG best comment ever
Ash, you are sooooo awesome, amazing and beutiful!
I actually thought so too! :-)
Honestly seeing your journey makes me feel almost like I’ve been through it with you and im literally like exploding inside with joy
Ash if you read this i wanna tell you- you are like my LGBTQ+ Role Model like seriously eeek so excited because of the heart on this comment
I have been subscribed to your channel for a long time now. Like... since before you and Grace met. I've never commented on any of your videos until today. I just wanted to say that I am incredibly proud of you and your journey. You are an inspiration to so many people, myself included. You deserve nothing but the best! You look awesome! Thank you for being courageous enough to be your authentic self. Thank you for letting us be a part of it. Sending nothing but love your way.
Isabela Mata dat cute! Dat cute!
I wish I could get top surgery, but at least I have a binder.
I hope you'll be able to one day. Lots of love.
I thought about getting a binder too
Yeah.....I do have a lot of binder
...cause I don't want unwanted boobs but also afraid of surgery............
Hopefully one day you are able to 💗😊
@@yaoifever2379 understandable, surgery is scary. Do what feels right for you, and talk to a professional about your fear. They know what they're doing and they might be able to help you move past it.
So happy for you! Congrats 😁🎉
Hi Jamie. You're awesome.
I love ya 🙆🙆❤❤
Oh hi, Jamie
It would be so cool if you did a video with Ash!
Oh my gosh I love you and ash
Ash and grace are the cutest things *THE SWEATSHIRT GAVE BIRTH TO A HUMEN*
you should be able to spell what you are, dear human*
Who said they were a human?
They a couple??
Lovely they might have been doing it on purpose
@@gakto.1936 yeah? They are married.
"Yup there's two of them. Cool. Soon there's gonna be zero" best. Quote. Ever.
ikr.
O.k c.o.o.l
Lol
For real tho
Y E S
Me: "I'm not gonna cry, no tears today, nah nah nah I'm not gonna cry."
Also me 6 minutes later: *sobbing happy and sad tears*
I am very glad that Ash has made their decent from sweat shirt to human. That’s what this series was all about, right? Glad their transition went well.
lolololol
What are sweatshirt pronouns
Rainbow Pancakes the depth of this comment knows no bounds lol
LOL
@@HeyThere005 So funny!!!
Ash you look amazing! I’m a straight, disabled mum vlogger to a 4 and a half year old.. your content is nothing like I’d normally watch but I’ve shared your channel with so many others because I think you’re so brave, honest & genuine. Never change. Xx
I don't know why but it was SUPER hard for me to see Ash crying. I felt like I was watching a really good friend cry and I couldn't reach out and hug them and I hated it. I'm glad they added the cute video Grace made later though, it made me feel better to see Ash getting all the support they deserve. Congratulations Ash! I hope you're feeling 100%!
FrenchFryGirl I know right I was like “ASH NOOO ITS OK IT WILL BE OK”
Emma Johnson, thank you for clarifying my comment, you're correct. But I believe Hobart was referring to a reply above that said "he/she/it", which is indeed wrong and a horrible thing to say, but that person is just trying to be inflammatory so there's probably very little point in arguing with them.
@@happyfuntime7098 right on Happy. Who goes and gets their camera and brings it in front of a toilet to cry.
"but first let us enjoy this emotional montage of everything that led up to it." and then I got an ad for tacos from burger king.
I feel kinda dumb admitting this since I don't know you irl, but I cried a little out of happiness for you. It's so awesome seeing someone get to live a happier, healthier life and that surprise video from Grace (and Grace in general) was amazing. Congratulations!!!
Same I almost cried. Such a sweet video, I do fricking happy for them!
I cried! When I saw @uppercaseCHASE1 and Aaron and all the love, I teared up. Ash! You look so amazing and so happy and I'm so happy for you! Fuck the haters, you made the absolute right decision!!
Grace is such a great wife :)
i got a pride advert during this and it’s the first lgbt advert i’ve seen can you hear me crying
I did too..
I just got it too
Aston same thing here is was amazing
watched the whole thing
I got a 5 minute ad and I watched the whole thing thats the best thing I‘ve ever seen
I’m SOOOOOOOOOOOOO HAPPPPPYYYY FOR YOUUU MY LOVE❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️ YESSSSSS
uppercaseCHASE1 YESSSS 💞💞💞💞💞
Queen Quenepa what
Queen Quenepa wtf????
Queen Quenepa LOL. Ok. I don't usually comment because there is just no point, but it's so funny how you went on Ash channel to pick on Chase about his own personal self-doubts and stuff and call it misogyny. That's so unrelated, uncalled for, unneeded and inapropriate.
uppercaseCHASE1 this is only my second comment on UA-cam ever but I had to...chase, don’t let what this person says get to you. Clearly, they don’t know you. I thank you for putting yourself out there, even if it means having to deal with comments like this. 💚
Hi Ash, my child has recently come out as trans. I am 53 and have been very supportive of them for the last few years. They are talking about getting top surgery. I suggested that they wait a while. They have just started taking T and while I'm not upset, I am nervous. I think your videos will be helpful for me.
If they are over 18 and have been fully diagnosed with gender dysphoria it would help them alot to get top surgery
Not the point of ur comment but you’re an amazing parent for educating yourself for your kid btw
Yo did your kid get top surgery yet? (If they are 18)
this just might be the most wholesome comment on all of youtube. you are a kick-ass parent and i hope your kid knows how lucky they are.
let your kid get top surgery!!!! youre making them suffer longer
I’m so happy for you Ash, your chest looks so great. Thank you for sharing this, I’m sure it’ll help so many AFAB non-binary people with chest dysphoria who want to do the big chop but feel alone in a world of mostly binary transguys on T going through with it. :)
Kovu is a unicorn Hi Kovu! I agree. It must be really hard to go through with top surgery surrounded by binary trans guys on t and and some nb trans people on t. I'm so happy for them!
Omg it’s kovuuu
How the heck did you describe my entire life in one comment? 😆😅
OMG KOVU!! And you are so right.
Kovu is a unicorn ii
YAY!!!! I love love love seeing fellow nonbinary people becoming comfortable in their bodies. I’m infinitely happy for you. 💞
Ashton Daniel aaa hello fellow nonbinary
Thank you pal
What’s up my enbys?
Subed
I remember when cutting your hair was a giant deal to you, I'm proud of you, ash. You've come so far
As a trans masculine non-binary person seeing this makes me really excited about when I eventually get top surgery
Update/ edit: i am one day post top surgery and I couldn’t be happier. To all the trans and non binary folks out there, I love you and I believe in you. Good things are coming so hang in there and keep believing in yourself ❤❤❤
Me too
Yay mutilation!
As a fucking what?
@@whocares11222 huh
I also really want top surgery
I mean, I don't know much about top surgery so maybe this is more normal than I think, but they so clean and your scars seem so thin and small from others I have seen!? They've done a really good job
Roly AGAJSKSK ROLY
I thought the exact same thing. The scars look sooo sooo good :-) that doctor is a champ.
Ash is also very much a champ for doing so well at taking care of the scars, and people also sometimes just heal really well. My dad is diabetic and 69 years old and his scars from cardiac bypass surgery not quite 3 years ago are nearly invisible and that’s a really serious surgery with massive incisions
Roly omg roly ilysm your vids are so cool
Their chest wasn't that big to begin with. That's something to keep in mind too.
"I have a headache and I'm hungryyy"
"When was the last time you ate?"
"...midniiight"
My mood after I wake up from a five and a half hour rest
My mood litterly all the time
xd
'theydies and gentlethems' I laugh a little to hard about this xD
Me tooo
*too
This is funny but they and them are pronouns not a gender
@@jackiesante SO TRUE!! It is defenetly funny but some inncorrect terms.
I dont see whats funny. I believe they stated that they were nonbinary. They dont feel comfy as either gender. Of course its the pronoun isnt a gender but its a more respectful to way describe them for who they are.
This was three years ago. Three years. And I still watch it whenever my dysphoria gets me down. Thank you ash. Ok you quit posting but thank you
And then boom they came back
@@dumbclown I saw!
@@ashniedosmialek3464 😂
I watch this almost every night... dysphoria really has me down rn. This reminds me that it'll be better someday
I was hoping you were gonna say, "It was a big weight off my chest" bc I live for puns lol sorry.
I'M SO PROUD OF YOU, ASH!!!! This must've been so scary, I admire your courage. I think you're a great person deserving of all the love in the world. You are loved and valid.
I was going to say, Get Out.. but under the circumstances.. Get Off might be more appropriate.
She said that in the coming out to her mom video
I’m 5 years post post with that same surgeon and I’m SOBBING RN just feeling all the feels over again!!
☺️🙌
Thank you so much Ash for sharing your story with us. The greatest gift anyone can ever give is their honest self and I feel like sharing your perspective, the ups and downs has been a wonderful gift for all of us who watch your channel and love and support you. Thank you for being you!
Jo Hammer hey Jo, you have a very interesting perspective. It sounds like you may have a vision of what a "pure body" looks like, but I'm not sure I would agree with your definition there. People make changes to their bodies all the time, whether it's permanent or temporary, and the purpose in most cases is to boost their own self confidence. That's partially why we get haircuts or nose jobs or braces or top surgery or wear makeup.
You may also have a perspective that somehow people who make decisions for themselves are resulting in the degradation of society, I'm a firm believer in protecting the rights of the individual and standing up for people making decisions for themselves about who they are and what they want to be. I'm not sure if you're a collectivist and believe that people should follow social order, whatever it may say to maintain a sense of status quo but it sure does sound like you think in that way.
All in all, we carry different perspectives but I would just like to know what your perspective is rooted in? My perspective is in loving yourself for who you are deep down inside, if changing your physical appearance helps you feel more comfortable displaying that and having it align with who you want to be, I'll support a person's right to do it. What is your perspective really rooted in? I don't ask to be sarcastic or rude, I would definitely love to talk to you about this. Maybe we can have a discussion and get a better understanding of each other here.
I think the comparison you draw is a non-comparable one. In the instance of changing your appearance with surgery, you are not putting yourself at risk for long-term potential harm. Anorexia does, it can lead to health issues and more. Would you make the same comparison for someone who gets breast implants or a nose job? You have to compare actions with similar results, to group in all behaviors doesn't help distinguish anything.
My position is to support people's decisions to make changes in their life which will increase their well-being without leading to long-term physical harm. You also made the claim that my position is a relative one based on fads, trends, philosophies and a huge growing industry, etc. For that I would just say that you would have to provide evidence that the person is doing it for one of those reasons rather than just asserting it to be so.
For example, if someone wants to get their ear lobes stretched out with ear gauges, I would support their right to do so if they feel like it's something they've thought through and want to do it because it will increase their sense of well being. You COULD make the argument that a person may be doing it because it's more fashionable and trendy right now, but that position doesn't really assert any claim because saying someone shouldn't do something because it's fashionable is not an argument.
I felt really sorry when I saw you in the bathroom crying...but happy that u are so strong! Hugs from Germany
I have never seen one of your vids before, but this one was on my "recommended" list, and I'm glad it was! Congrats on the top surgery - they did an excellent job, and you seem so thrilled, which is the most important thing. People are never going to be satisfied with the life choices anyone else makes. It's about YOU and what makes you happiest, because nobody else is going to life your life. I don't know why strangers feel the need to thrust their opinions into people's faces, but eh. Forget 'em. You're doing great. :)
I cried. Basically for the whole video. I told my bf and he just promised to do something like what Grace did for you and just. This wasn't even my journey and I was crying my eyes out. I'm so incredibly happy for you.
CONGRATULATIONS ASH!!!!!!!!
JEMMA thanks pal!!!
best doctor ever ''yep there's two of them cool soon there'll be zero'' i need to get me a doc like this 🤣🤣
I saw the results in person like a month ago and I still cried at the reveal lmao...like a lot. Congrats
Same!!! It's so nice seeing someone in such a state of true self😊
This is one of those rare long videos that I watched all the way through without skipping anything and I don't regret it at all. I'm so happy for you Ash! 💜💜💜💜
MercifulBlockhead yeah, I usually don't watch long vlogs all the way through but I was just so emotionally engulfed in Ashe's journey
Same
My heart broke when you struggled with the migraine!! They are a frequent thing with me and I felt your pain!
MsFaeNicole
oh gosh same :( they’re terrible
I’m sorry you have to deal with them regularly! I think the fact that your reaction is empathy really demonstrates an inherent goodness in your heart, I wish you all the best in dealing with your struggles
Watching u cry over the toilet brought back a lot of memories. I was there supporting my best friend through his top surgery and he was absolutely miserable
AAAAAAAAAAAAH
I'M SO HAPPY FOR YOU
❤️🖤❤️🖤❤️🖤❤️🖤❤️
Echo Gillette love you 😙😙
Echo Gillette OMG HI THERE
Yay!! UA-cam influencer love💟💟
There is hope.
Echo Gillette I got so excited when I saw you in here and supporting Ash! Love you 💖
Echo Gillette sammeeeeee also ily ❤️
I am a trans boy and I want to get top and bottom surgery. But I don't know if my parents want me to until I'm 18 so I will just wait. I am so happy for you Ash !
It will be ok! The time will come when you will be even more comfortable in your own skin, you just have to be a little patient ^^
Hold strong friend, we all have your back :3 save up, do research on the surgeon and recovery, sending love n support to you ❤
Sadie Decay Thank you so much.
You should wait, just Incase your body is like “No wait I’m not done growing yet.” And it causes complications later on, but good luck to you.
Unfortunately, you legally have to wait until you are 18, even if your parents allow it.
Omg I hope this is a... TOP comment!
🤣 But also congrats Ash!!!
Follow up: 😭❤️ so many emotions and love in this video. I’m not crying. You’re crying. ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
Watts The Safeword HOW DID YOU KNOW!?
I nearly cried way too many times 😊
Watts The Safeword BOooo
I'm so glad I found your channel because you introduced me to this wonderful person ahh so much love!
When Ash cries I just wanna comfort 'em. You're doing so well and we love you!
*her
@@user-qjvqfjv Ash actually uses any pronouns, so nice try loser lol
@@user-qjvqfjvwhy? I thought they are non binary.
Ash you look so beautiful and happy throughout this video and you’re my inspiration. As someone who has never quite conformed to gender roles and has known for a long time they were LGBT, seeing this and seeing you going out and leading your authentic life and just being true to yourself has inspired me to do the same. I’ve locked myself in the closet when it comes to certain people because they’ve never quite accepted me and I allowed them to believe who I am is just a phase or that I’ve been “confused”. Thank you Ash. Thank you so much.
Okay i have a real question though... so in general, men showing their nipples is “advertiser friendly”, but female boobs are not. So what about when someone is nonbinary? What are the rules based on? Gender or the size of boobs? Cause some men have larger ones and some women smaller....
what makes your naked top half suddenly not NSFW?
Just my random thoughts...
Congratulations Ash on the surgery ^^
lapeachMC I was thinking that. So before the surgery because ash still had boob fat...can’t be topless. Now that the fat was removed...ash can proudly be topless.
Alecia Chapin exactly!! Its quite bizarre tbh.
And i even know for myself that seeing a more masculine top half of the body is like completely normal, but female boobs are instilled in me as something nsfw and something that should be covered up...
lapeachMC
ikr, like I'm not saying I want to run around topless (personally), but why can men's chests be exposed while female boobs can't? I just can't seem to think of an awnser that makes sense
It shows how ridiculous this arbitrary line around boobs vs not boobs is, doesn't it?
#freethenipple
Boobs are age restricted, and flat chests are not. So idk... I think it doesn't have to do with the person's gender, just whether they have boobs or not, or whether or not they want to/can show their chest
Ash, it would be hurting yourself not to get top surgery. We love you.
-the Internet
❤
Speak for yourself. That comment represents about 1 1/2% of the planets population. And "Ash”, you made a wrong decision!
@@robert_costello First of all Ash is their name so dont put it in parenthesis. Second they made the right decusions becuase it made them happy. And third, you can have your opinion but please keep it to yourself if you know its rude and/or offensive
Angelicelephant ! She mutilated her body and you expect me to embrace her with open arms? No! The only person that made the right decision, was her doctor. He saw a profit from this. And don’t tell me when to share my opinion, it’s protected by the Second Amendment and there is no such thing as hate speech.
Angelicelephant ! #Trump2020 🇺🇸
This really just confirms my hope that I can get top surgery when I’m able to this was so cool to see this video it really does make me feel like getting top surgery is the right decision rather than putting up with the constant top dysphoria
*your voice is so cute i can’t :,,,)*
Everything about her is cute
*EVERYTHING ABOUT BOTH OF THEM IS CUTE*
Squishy Beano Them not her that’s why they needed top surgery 🤣
@@hikiangelpyon Oh crap that never occurred to me!
Thanks for that, I legit forgot about it, sorry again ;-;
Squishy Beano LOL it’s okay IDK a simple mistake especially if your not LGBTQ+ don’t worry.
@@offyourhead @squishy Beano@Squishy Beano
Ahhhh. I'm so so so happy for you Ash😄😄😄😄.
Edit: Your chest looks amazing 😍😍😍
SO PROUD OF YOU HONEY
13:12
this made me cry a bit, because when they told u this, i kind of felt appreciated too even tho im alone in my room
My top surgery is today, and im sooo freakin nervous. So I had to come watch your video just so I could get excited again!!
hey! How did it go? :) Wish you all the best!
How was it?
CONGRATULATIONS to you sending my prayers that you have a speedy recovery and always be proud of your self from New York City ✌
Hope your recovery is going well!
How'd it go? Asking a month after the comment was posted.
CONGRATS ASH, IM SO PROUD OF YOU💋
I'M WRITING THIS AT 1 AM WHILE I'M GROUNDED FROM THE INTERNET BUT I'M A LITTLE SNEK AND STARTED BROWSING THE INTERNET AND SAW THIS VID. CONGRATS ASH!!!!!
Jessica is a Messica What did you do? XD
Obey your parentals
I’m telling on you
Girls in middle school: I hate bring flat I wish I was thick
Ash: I wish I was flat
I was the same way as ash lol
I feel the same way as Ash rn Oof
@youtube viewer wanna trade lmao
I’m a girl but wanna be flat bc i’m insecure 😂
BRUH AM 10 AND I HAVE A BIG CHEST
I’m excited to have my boobs added instead of removed. I haven’t done anything at all as far as transitioning goes because i’m closeted, but I’m very exited to come out one day and be the girl I am, even if i’ll be six feet tall with broad shoulders
Kassandra M my cousin is a cis woman and she is six foot and is quite broad from all the sports she does it’s not that uncommon our advice ( mainly from her since I’m ftm )be careful about heels if you wish to wear them as some will make you look way taller than you actually are when wearing them wedges are good u know the ones with the cork bottoms stilettos with the platforms at the bottom add extra height ( she personally doesn’t like them but it’s everyone’s taste) hope we helped 😊
hugs from out of the closet :3 you can do it girl ! There'll be a day when it feels safe for you , and then it'll feel great to be able to be who you are out loud ^ w ^ and there's thousands of people just like you out there , and right here ^ w ^
I'm not tall but am a cis that sucks at heels: wedges are good and kitten heels are AWESOME because they still can be very cute and feminine or have pointed toes, but will be like, anywhere from 1/2 to 1 1/2 inches.
Also, I'm excited for future-you to be the girl you are, as well Kassandra M!
I'm a 18 y/o cis female, 6ft tall with broad shoulders. Haters gonna hate, but who cares?
Come to the Netherlands, here are 6ft women not extraordinary haha
Oh hon I wanted to reach through the screen and hug you when you were crying with pain. You did really good, I’m glad you’re so happy, and that you have so much support.
I’m also glad you showed the messy emotional parts, cause I desperately want surgery in the future and I’m kinda nervous and it was reassuring
Your voice is cuteeeeeee😍
I like the way you talk
IKR
me too
Translation:I like your vocals :3
It's such a crazy feeling watching this while healing from top sugery
Awh I'm so happy for you, how's recovery going?
Sorry that society pushed you toward self-mutilation.
I live in a (in general) not-that-tolerant place, but I really think it's because of ignorance and not dislike or intentional rudeness. I wish everyone in this town would watch you tube videos like this one. I myself am "cis" (word I learned from UA-cam) and have never been friends with a out trans or gay person. Not because of my choice, just because people around here aren't out, or maybe just leave towns like this. Anyway, I feel so much more prepared for the day when I do have the chance to get to know a person who is not cis because of videos like this, and I don't see how the hate could continue if everyone had the chance to just learn about their fellow humans. Congrats on the successful surgery and keep up the great advocacy, Ash!
I love how you call it a "fanperson" instead of a fangirl, everyone can fangirl! Or, fanperson
I’ve literally been watching your channel since you had long hair, and were living as a girl, THATS how long it’s been and ??? I’m so proud and happy for you
I know this video is over a year old now but I have watched this so many times and it makes me so happy every single time. It is so validating for me, a nonbinary person who doesn't want to start T. It was actually this video that made me realize that, hey, I can get top surgery too if I want! Anyways, thank you for being you and I am so happy for you still.
You look amazing! Thanks for sharing this very personal moment with us!
Also...after the reveal I finally realized what the drains are for :O
Andrew Power what are they for?
Mrs. Agape Eros they’re to catch excess fluids like blood and pus or whatever
YOU'RE GLOWING ASH IM SO HAPPY
I HAVEN'T EVEN SEEN THE WHOLE VIDEO YET AND IM GRINNING
I am so freaking happy for you. You look great, it's very FLATTER-ing, as I knew it would be... (I already made that joke on an AshandGraceSPACE video but shhh)
I think I probably want top surgery in the future. I love ya! 💕
Me: mom can i have a top surgery pls?
My mom: WAIT ARE YOU TRANS?
me: pfft of course not , i'm still a boy
Mom: hunny you were a girl
Me: oh
Hate my "jokes"
Me: I'm non binary but this is relatable content.
I just am going to randomly say this. I was born female but am now realizing that I am an enby. I feel comfortable with he/him pronouns but am I not valid if I “look like a girl”.
@@ArtisanAsteroid I’m no pro but I think you’re totally valid just how you are. The LGBTQ+ community has a lot of different classifications. As long as your comfortable with yourself and who you are I think you can totally be “qualified” as enby. Like I’m (almost positive) that I’m trans (I was born female), but I don’t think I’ll ever fully ‘look’ like a male. I’d preferably use they/them or even she/her pronouns so I think it just matters that you’re comfortable. Again, I’m not a pro at this sort of stuff but I hope I helped somewhat (doubt it tho lol). Have a great day anyways!
@@ArtisanAsteroid what you look like has no effect on what you are on the inside! As in, your are 100% valid if you don’t look “androgynous”!
@B N9476me either 😭😭😭
I can’t even lie your surgery is healing awesomely and it looks great!
Keziah Rose why would you lie anyway
I had a 5 minutes long ad on this video about visiting Oslo and the ad showed 3 people experiencing their first pride in Oslo. It was a great ad honestly.
oh my gosh I came into this and knew it'd be amazing but THE VIDEO GRACE PUT TOGETHER IS SO CUTE AND AMAZING
It legit made me cry! I'm SO happy to see Grace and alllll those wonderful people did that for Ash !
Yeah it was so great! I got especially excited to see Chase's contribution, just because I love him haha
I really struggle with internalised enby-phobia and every time I need some enby joy, I come to your videos. Thanks for all the sharing over the years, it's really helped me
the thumbnail says “surery” that’s a mood
Max all the yes. My thoughts exactly! They surery made the right decision🎉🎇🤣
Meeeeeeee, English is my first language and I spell things wrong and forget letters 75% of the time
Grace: Tell yourself that.. that you love yourself
Me: *cries*
Im not crying youre crying
(Seriously though the fact that you have so many people that care for you and love you makes me incredibly happy. Chase and Alayna are my LOVES )
I really enjoy their channel because I have considered top surgery. Sometimes when I look in the mirror my breasts seem like they should not be there. I have tried out living with a male name, pronouns and clothes, and it quickly ended, cause it did not match. I do have very long hair, and feminine qualities, but I also have days where I bind, so I am not really one or the other and I think that is ok. But everytime I come to this channel, I have that relief of similarity to someone. Ash has shared some things I relate to, and for now that is enough for me.
I just teared up a little thinking about Ashley Mardell, who wanted all these things but didn’t know how to get to this moment. But you got here, Ash! You made it this far on your journey and I wish I could go back in time and tell “Ashley” that it’s going to be okay. ❤️
(Also, Grace is the most supportive wonderful human, wow)
Right? how COOL was Grace for being like "oh yeah cleaning drains are 100% my thing and I'm on it." Has Grace done this before for someone/medical field or just learned to help Ash?
And why was the end really giving me pokemon vibes?
can we all just mention how effing fit ash looks?! Congratulations Ash.
Your chest looks really really good♥~
They did a wonderful job
i just came back from a rly shitty / transphobic / nbphobic side of yt and this is soo wholesome :DD
*gasp* the talking sweatshirt turned into Ash *gasping intensifies*
The sweatshirt has evolved into an ash!!
*gotta catch em all*
Not enough credit for the intro
"We're on our waaaaay to surgerayyy. We're so gaaaaaay"
😂
♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡
SO HAPPY FOR YOU!!!
It's 5 years ago I first found this video and now I'm watching this just a few days post op myself!!! (Trying to ignore the itchiness x_x) Life is wonderful and I want to thank you again for sharing your journey. Trans Joy is real ♡
Congratulations!!
awww when u cried my heart legit broke
Wow, Ash. I don't identify as trans but have seen tons of transition related videos, yet i don't think they have ever made me feel as overwhelmed with emotion as i am right now, just watching you discovering and celebrating your chest. I don't even know if it's because i relate in a way or if it's because you look so damn happy - but i totally just started crying. Mad respect, Ash! Also, props to Grace for being obviously awesome.
Grace is so amazingly supportive. You are very lucky.
BeingTheHunt
Ikr. Grace is the real MVP
I'm been watching this video over and over I just wanna say... thank you, your positive energy is amazing and this video is giving me confidence and comfort to get top surgery. I've been scared to get it but I'm finally feeling excited for the future of when I do get it... thank you so much ash. You've helped me more than you know!!! 🙏😊
Me clicking on this: I will not cry
*The love mini video starts*
Me: *openly weeping*
Hey Alex
Alexander Benson lol same
gosh, at the reveal i couldn't help but cry (the video that came before is kind of to blame, too, but shhh, its so sweet). im so, so happy for you!! you deserve every inch of it, ash, and it looks amazing 💞💞 you truly are super loved and super valid and super beautiful. congratulations. we're all so happy for you!!
I don't see how anything that made a person feel happier and more themselves that didnt harm anyone could ever be the wrong decision.
I know this is like a year and a half late, but I am soooo happy for you Ash! I'm glad that you took that step and it made you so completely happy and relieved.
OMFG YAYYYYYYYYY FINALLY!!! I JUST CAME OUT TO MY FRIEND AS GENDERQUEER AND HE WANTED TO KNOW WHAT TOP SURGERY JUST AS I GOT THIS NOTIFICATION!!!!!!! LOVE BOTH OF YOU, YOU ARE VALID
Iris Macaulay what do you mean by “genderqueer”??
Carter Cuntnugget I mean confused genderwise, just not a girl or boy. But I'm not sure what I am.
Iris Macaulay well there’s only really girl, boy, or agender, and (actual) agender people are EXTREMELY rare. So, unless you have dysphoria, (which you would know by now if you did have it), you’re cis. Don’t make life harder for you than it has to be
Carter Cuntnugget first of all, I do have dysphoria, second of all, there are many more genders, just watch more of Ashes that he has. There's gender-fluid, non-binary, Etc.
Iris Macaulay yaaa that’s why I said there’s girl, boy, AND agender, just that agender, if it’s real, would be EXTREMELY rare. Genderfluid is made up. Speaking as a diagnosed trans guy, gender dysphoria is something that does not fluctuate to such an extremity that someone can be AFAB with “dysphoria” making them genderfluid, and be okay with being a girl one day. “Genderfluid” isn’t a gender. What you’re thinking about is GNC (gender non-conforming) meaning that someone’s style/fashion choices will vary from girly to manly depending on the day. I’m not trying to be mean, but honestly, after doing a lot of research, I take my opinions from scientists who live their lives researching this stuff. If you have any questions, please ask
Grace: we're on are waaaayyy to surgeeeeeerrrrryyyyy were so gaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyy
Me: flips hair back and forth*
U wanna here a joke call me shakesqueer lmao
Hear* ;-;
*our
*we’re
Hey Ash. So, I've never really agreed with you on much, and I can't say that any of our viewpoints are similar. But I wanted to say that I'm really happy you're happy, and that regardless of our differing opinions I'm really glad for you. Keep doing you :)
Daniel, thanks for being kind even though you disagree with them!
Daniel Joseph same here. Ash is great, regardless if I disagree with their views or agree.
Thanks for not being a douche.
Nice pfp
im two years late, but the wholesome feeling of this hasnt changed.
I bet it feels good to get this off your chest (ba dum tsss)
But seriously you look so happy for it so I couldn't be happier for you.
Aw, love...migraines are the worst. I've had them every since I was four. I got daith piercings to help. Congrats on your surgery being a success!
Heaven Toms you’re so sweet awh
mia Thank you! Ditto!
I suffer from migraines ik how u feel😔
Does the daith piercing work? I've been looking into them
Nicole Flynn You should seriously consider them. I didn't have actual migraines for about 2 years and if I did it was more like a fit of exhaustion than pain and nausea. If I get too stressed out from my triggers (light, sounds, etc) then the pain comes, but I can typically catch it by then and take medication. The piercings (I got both done) were honestly the best investment I've ever made and I reallllllly hope they work for you too, friend!
LOOK AT THOSE DESIGNER NIPS OMG
I'm watching this on Monday, after having my own surgery this past Friday, and I keep almost crying from joy and relief seeing and hearing someone else feeling so similar to me. I take my binder off the first time today, and this kind of muscle weakness always makes me feel nauseous. I never thought I'd get here.
And this video, when you first posted it, helped me realize I needed it to begin with. Thank you, Ash.