Be willing to walk away, be willing to lose him! Never love a man more than you love yourself. Bye, yeah I may be hurt but I will heal and still gonna be premium👑👑👑
Not able, do not think he should , do not want to , not willing, do not have a clue how to he's complacent with where he is in life and who he is because there are many female that will allow him the way he is. Then those same female that allow him the way he is , will go thru another situation ship, broken, maybe traumatized, asking Why,
Last time I give a reminder I simply said it n leave n that was my breakup, I can’t groom no grown ass man like that’s an assignment I ain’t tryna do so I left
Is so overwhelming as a woman that we even have to do all of this to make a man respect us, men should just grow up and treat others how they want to be treated. Period.
He is right, I did exactly what he said and I decided if you can't respect me, then you can respect my absence. He still trying to reach out, I'm no longer interested.
@@Uncensoredwithsevynk when WEAK remember your pain .... look up narcissist lots of videos out there will explain what and who you are dealing with. I PROMISE it will keep you strong becuz they NEVER CHANGE EVER!!!!
@@patriciasmith7539 my ex just text me again good morning today . Even though he left me for his ex still text. but show.much he doesnt care. Not once has he asked how am.i doing jn this quarantine. Never ever talks about me or asks about my life. Just talks about HIM and his kids. I flew to Florida to see my daughter today and he asked if i boarded but has yet ask if i landed safe ..am i ok?? i could be in a damn swamp plane crashed and all and he doesnt show an ounce of care. All they r doing is keeping us trapped emotiina4lly and mentallym trapped As a hold me down . So they have a fall back. Because if they run into someone they truely want. They will def ghost us!! Fuck him!! Fuck them ladies. We need to reasert our value and give them.our absemce no excuses
@@Uncensoredwithsevynk Please move on. The honest truth they don't care! Can't make a person love you or care about if the person doesn't. The thing I'm.doing is moving on and encouraging myself. I Honestly thank God I'm not with mine. Anyone that care less about my well being is not worth the stress. If he didn't respect you in his presence MAKE HIM RESPECT YOU IN YOUR ABSENCE. Don't HELP HIM Don't BE HIS FALL BACK Don't BE HIS FRIEND. HES SHOWN He's NOT A FRIEND. ITS ALL ABOUT THE KIDS NOW. BETTER IS WAITING FOR YOU.
So true i agree. Ladies dont settle for less dont lower your standards. Dont allow no man to disrespect you when he disrespect you he dont care he dont love you no respect no relationship period and ladies respect and love yourselves more. Queens level up👑👍
My current situation i dont care to see him or talk today. What he did on all days Mother's Day i am officially unavailable for anything he has to say to me. I usually will communicate after a miscommunication but he is DEAD to me . We have been friends since 2010 and dated these last three years and I am so done frfr
100% factual. I have lived that life, till I rose up and finally said no more. Ever since I walked, I've had the such peace. Yes, it hurts at first, but better than hurting everyday.
Ladies!!! This man is absolutely right! Listen to his words carefully, plz. I am in a situation right now where i am getting disrespected because I gave unconditional love, sort of. Meaning, I let things slide tht I shouldn't have and I'm paying for it dearly now. How you ask, well, because he no longer respects my presence in this relationship and it shows. It shows in how he speaks to me, acts when I'm bothered about something and how he makes me feel unimportant. He crossed boundaries tht shouldn't have been crossed and instead of him learning from the mistake he took it as my value is decreased. Long story short know yr worth and stand yr ground.
Thx for sharing your truth because sooooo many ppl are not living their truth and it creates a cycle of ppl creating fake narratives for whatever reason. Now I'm not saying that some ppl aren't happy like they're proclaiming but if everyone is happy where do the hurt and broken ppl come from?! So again thx for sharing.
Same :( But I was so garded in my other relationship and he didn't work so I thought I should be more open about my love and yet, didn't work. He left me with a text message... And I am actually relieved, sad, but relieved 🤷🏾♀️
How many women have repeated themselves (needs, insecurities, pain, or concerns) nearly 1 million times and still went unheard? Your absence can not go unnoticed, it's too bright and too loud!!! Your presence is like rewarding bad/selfish/insensitive behavior.
@Humble Warrior I hear you and it's never a good thing to be biased to the point of being logically fallacious. I think that historically speaking and looking at the overarching system universally, women have been subjected to a lot of trauma and oppression. That's what you want to tie into the exploitation of women emotionally, socially, and physically. Women have higher rates of mental illness because of adding on the mood/internalizing disorders along with everything else that men are prone to. There are indubitably antisocial, abusive, and sociopathic/psychopathic women. In a majority of those cases childhood emotional and sexual abuse were present, usually cyclical family patterns.Even female prisoners' sentences were correlated with male affiliation. I could break it all down but for the sake of brevity, aggression, resource encroachment, poaching, and ability to kill on massive scales are traditionally male behaviors. And we now know that they were not solely for the purpose of providing for women.
There ain't no coming back from that. If he lets me be absent or he is absent it's over. I ain't here to wait around on somebody to recognize my worth because he isn't going to.
I didn't even bother giving reminders to the last one. I just up and left, when he got home, all my stuff was gone because I moved out and was done done.
It's not really unconditional love that makes women accept bad treatment. It's fear. Fear of losing him, abandonment, being alone, the agony of dopamine withdrawal and detachment.
I've walked many, many, times with the men I've dated. They never think you will and when you do walk they replace you very quickly with a weak woman just to try and 'proove' something. It's our job to leave them at the 'reduced items' end of the store where they all belong. 😆
💥!!!! The more he values you, the more he will work to keep you. Don’t be thirsty..❤️ yourself first. Value you and others will follow. ❤️will find you.
He said I threw a “curveball” at him once I decided to end it and it was through text. That’s how much the “situationship” drained me. We actually lived together...We were also suppose to go to Florida on a trip but my gut was strong and it was saying no. It was a lot but still happy it’s over when I know I gave so many chances to a person I really lowered my standards for🤷🏾♀️ never again
Please consider continuing to share your experience regarding this? I find myself feeling anxious about my decision even though I know any “situation-ship” is a sign to move on.
You nailed it! I just left my bf because I’ve been wondering why he won’t publicly acknowledge he has a girlfriend. He’s a celebrity so I get it that he doesn’t want everyone in his business. But when he does interviews he answers like he’s single. I let him know about his behaviour and he got upset so I left him. Now he’s trying to reach me. He was warned if I felt disrespected again, I would leave so I did. It hurts because we almost been together 2 years and talked about the future. I will not be disrespected so he can cheat on me later. “When a person shows you who they are the first time, believe them.” ~ Maya A
Raise your value, women! We gotta put some value with self respect and love to ourselves so no man can destroy us. We can be happy with or without a man.
This is exactly where I’m at right now, I know he’s gonna respect me when I’m gone. The last thing I said to him was, “ you’re gonna regret treating me the way you did” and I meant every word because I knew then what I needed to do. GONE BABY GONE!!
My man literally always tell me "he can't afford to love me, he has never met someone like me, and that I mean everything to to him". I have seen him make soo many changes since first meeting him to actually becoming his girlfriend and even until now! He's constantly trying to "fine tune" himself be a better man so as to ensure the progression and longevity of our relationship ❣
I love this! I think where people get confused is in thinking loving someone unconditionally means suddenly not loving and respecting yourself - becoming a doormat, victim, or martyr. Nope. You can love someone AND walk away because you have healthy boundaries, which include self-respect.
I’ve never been the “she ain’t going nowhere type” n my ex realize that after 4 years, I ain’t settling n just accepting anything in the name of relationship
I walked away from my ex he thought i was not going no where just stay i was not going to settle for disrespect im happy and blessed i made the right decision for me i love myself more. If a man disrespect you he dont love you or respect you dont settle respect yourself and move on period. Thank you Derrick God bless everyone.👏🙏
@@Uncensoredwithsevynk yes it was hard but work on yourself and it becomes eaiser. Men are logical. He knew exactly what he was doing. Make him regret losing you and that's with the power of absence (no contact rule)
@@Relle. that man has so much ego and pride. He wld.neber regret losing me. Although i hv never ever gone silent. And he looks sooo good . So women be in him! But ok. I am going no contact . F it. I cant this. I am exhausted of feeling like plan b. thaaaank u
It spoke to me deeply when you said "when a man meets you he has to level up, he has to challenge himself, and he has to deal with his own demons...etc." that helped remind me that when men take their space its not to reject or abandon me. It's their time to regroup and deal with those matters that are so very personal. I felt the urge to point that out, I do apologize for the interruption. 🙏
No need to apologize for an interruption! Lolz yes that was a key line for me as well. However, he could go distant for any number of reasons. But it really doesn’t matter what it is. What matters is that he’s not at your level, and definitely not worth your goodness
I know that’s right!!! I definitely needed to hear this because I always feel like I’ve done something wrong when I know I haven’t. I have to know the power in my absence, respect means everything
Did you just say "iced out bandaids?" Come through with the clever metaphors Bro. Jackson! This is so true. If you continuously forgive a person after trampling your boundaries and breaking your heart, they'll just keep losing respect for you. They think you're weak and pathetic. They may not say that in words, but their deeds will show it everytime.
My man threatens the end of the relationship a lot when he doesn’t get his way, but my friend said the one threatening it is more scared to lose the relationship, so maybe my absence will mean something with him.
Exactly, sometimes I have to catch myself. I realized that I could really love someone and it be real and Still Understand that maybe they’re just not the one for me. I have a lot to look forward too I can’t slow myself to hold myself back because of emotions that don’t serve my greater purpose.
"There's a built in respect to her absence off top!" YES!!! This Man has already put in the work and made the necessary changes. A woman or Man who's about business is definitely not about any games!! Derrick is spot on!!
You just described the women I have became after my experiences. But now it doesnt even get that far. The "seeing shit for what it is" complex. Got me this far. Real talk!! Great message!
Unconditional love is not over tolerating disrespect or mistreatment We teach men how to treat us by what we will or will not tolerate ✊❤️ keep your Self Respect high and your tolerance low
This video is soooooo late 😂 but right on time this Coronavirus has people in the dms like ........SKKIIIIIIIRRTTTTT✋🏾 🛑 all jokes aside though I would even add it goes for friends as well not just romantic relationships SELF LOVE is the best LOVE 💕
Derrick will pack so much knowledge in a short video. Amazing! This is what I do....I will say a very little. When it is near the end I will explain myself and what I desire. Lastly I am stone cold silent because I told you. Now I am not saying all men are like this but I notice if you talk and say I am leaving over and over it does not work but silence and absence works most times. People understand actions. They see that you value yourself. God bless you all stay safe.
God on point as usual. I've been with this guy for 4 years last Friday. He's younger than me and had so many problems that I didn't know about a lot stemming from how he was raised his mother is a narcissist and he had no role models. He had a drinking problem and an addiction to you know those videos. Anyhow I thought that he would change and for a while it did. Then came the verbal disrespect that he'd do when he was drunk that I'd let slide because it was the liquor and continued to give my all. Then it was the anger issues and I gave the excuse that it was his upbringing. Then it came the name calling. Nope. I should have stopped it a long time ago, always half azzed apologies and I can't change and I'm trying and it's hard. Ain't nothing to hard for a person to change if they want it bad enough. I changed my standards for this person, I lowered my expectations. I could have had anyone and had plenty of men at my beck and call why the hell did I stay so long. Smdh. He always knew I'd forgive him and take him back. Now I'm like Casper get yourself right I don't have time to raise a boy.
Derrick, after years of mental and emotional abuse, I don't give reminders, I give ultimatums. It's my way or no way and he can hit the highway. That's what I learned from giving unconditional love, now I love myself and only I can make me happy.
Absolutely correct Jaxn! My husband of 10yrs gave me lots of BS, I moved country with our kids to pursue my career development. Now he is behaving, acting and thinking straight. All these were simply hard work to achieve when I was always forgiven.
This is my current situation. The man that I’m dealing with is emotionally unavailable and highly insecure. He’s slowly pushing me away because I’m tired of the disrespect and manipulation.
yup same happened with my ex he's the same way and he got into a rebound realationship smh so the best advice that I could give u is to leave because he's going to keep doing it block him and don't respond back to him be Casper 👻
Jasmine Miller Yes! I realize that I have tolerated too much. He will watch all of my stories on Facebook, but not even bother to send me a text saying, “hey, how are you?” or “hey, how’s your day going”. I’m not saying text me all the time, but at least from time to time simply communicate. The only time that he texts me is when he wants something. Every time (like an idiot) I have come running, but this time I won’t. I deserve better and it’s time to close this door. If I don’t, then I will regret it later.
Your guy is a Narcissist. Type in Assc Direct on UA-cam. He’s a narc slayer and his videos are like Derrick’s..... On point!!!!! They ALL behave the same
You are speaking the truth! I love this. I have been that " she ain't going no where" woman so many times. Not happening this time. Thank god I found this.
Love is not a job. I would just leave it ever I heard he is tired, he needs space, he cannot have they same feelings for me all they time. And let him respect my absence forever.
You are absolutely right!! I just had to do this and the man is doing more now that I have left him than he did when I was entertaining him. Straight Keith Sweat begging for me not to move on.....but I always mean what I say and say what I mean.
Do this instead: All people respect all people and their time - all the time. Teach your children that, then we don't need to re-teach adults simple courtesy and human respect.
Don't tolerate his bs. Years ago I was with a guy I loved n he disrespected me by talking to an ex who was so in love with him. He told me he knows I'll never leave him, I was appalled when he said that n i left that fool that same day n move on. He had no choice to go be with the other girl.
Mine actually told me "i know you're not going anywhere, you can't leave"! Few days ago he acted up because i didn't give him something he wanted. He went cold and gave me the silent treatment. I didn't bother and went a step further. I blocked and deleted him!! It's been 5 days now ..... Enjoying my peace and the goal is to move forward.... especially if he keeps acting unbothered. Have had enough!!
Thankful I'm still NEVER responding and moving forward...... with ME😉. NO contact and NO communication after betrayal for 19mo serves me well ☯😎👑🍷. Keep your crown💛
![Дон ДОН, Алаудинов и СБЕЖАВШИЕ из под Курска ахматовцы 😁 [Пародия]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/dEfCf5IK26Q/mqdefault.jpg)
Be willing to walk away, be willing to lose him! Never love a man more than you love yourself. Bye, yeah I may be hurt but I will heal and still gonna be premium👑👑👑
Only if women would stop confusing these shady things men do as love. All you hear women say is, Idk but I love him. I'm like BUT HOW 🤔
Spot on baby girl!
@@OliviaBaeBy 👀
Periodt
Period.
Unconditional love is for your children and your pets. The end
Hannah Banana sheraseven quote? 😀
Anastasija Beograd, is it? Hahaha I didn’t know, I just commented my opinion. .... then again, we all can’t be wrong about the same thing, right? 😂
Hannah Banana yeaah you should watch her on YT - sheraseven1
Anastasija Beograd thanks for the recommendation! Will check her out
Hannah Banana ABSOLUTELY RIGHT!!!! ❤️
It’s not that he doesn’t think you’re amazing, he’s just unable to stretch himself to love a woman of your depth. That’s on him, not you
Not able, do not think he should , do not want to , not willing, do not have a clue how to he's complacent with where he is in life and who he is because there are many female that will allow him the way he is. Then those same female that allow him the way he is , will go thru another situation ship, broken, maybe traumatized, asking Why,
Amy Morale Viscous cycle
Thank you
Thank you, this really helped me!
Ravyn Woodard Glad to hear it ❤️ wishing you peace and happiness x
If he can't appreciate your presence then give him your absence.
So true 👍
True
“Don’t give threats, give reminders” 💪🏾
Like I told my friend (female). It's not my problem that they take my information how they want 😂 It may hit em hard but 🤷🏾
Last time I give a reminder I simply said it n leave n that was my breakup, I can’t groom no grown ass man like that’s an assignment I ain’t tryna do so I left
And even with reminders they'll still leave. Many will give u their ass to kiss and let u know that they have other options!!
Don't give empty threats
Natalie Negrita305 that’s clearr cut signs you need to leave their as*
So true. Dont be the she aint going no where chick anymore
There it is...
Don't be Khloe. Don't be Cardi. Don't be Jhené, ladies.
Better Late Than Broke been there done that🏃♀️🏃♀️🏃♀️🏃🏃🏃
I Gotta just do me ...lol. Nobody does me better
So true my ex's thought i was not going no where. I showed them im not staying and im not settling i walked away from them Good bye.
“ you can’t make a man respect your absence until you know the value of your absence” ..... glad to say I know the value of my absence now 💪🏾
bigjayking24 thank you! He honestly puts things into perspective for me! I have my female perspective but it’s good to hear the male’s side
Yes!!!
Is so overwhelming as a woman that we even have to do all of this to make a man respect us, men should just grow up and treat others how they want to be treated. Period.
Or grow up, and treat people below how they deserved.
Facts. This madness just for some basic care and dignity is exhausting.
Period.
So True Nikeya!💙💙💙💙👍
Their big babies!
My ex boyfriend literally used to tell me in my face that I’m going no where when we dated. Fast forward he is an ex now. Found my self worth!!
GOT'EM!
Way to go girl. You are beautiful. His loss.
What he really meant was that he was going to get no where in life... you so made the right move...😁
Same Sis, sameeeee.
Well was he right?
How's he going to miss you if YOU NEVER go away.
FACTS!!!!
Yes! I left today
But if they jumped to someone ASAP he won't feel nothing but he won't ever here from me AGAIN
@@milagrosrodriguez4136 that part 💯
He is right, I did exactly what he said and I decided if you can't respect me, then you can respect my absence. He still trying to reach out, I'm no longer interested.
I pray i can get there. Struggling to ignore his calls and text.
@@Uncensoredwithsevynk when WEAK remember your pain .... look up narcissist lots of videos out there will explain what and who you are dealing with. I PROMISE it will keep you strong becuz they NEVER CHANGE EVER!!!!
I'm in the same boat. Tired of the foolishness. They always pretend after they see a lady has moved on. I'm.not accepting his disrespect and lies
@@patriciasmith7539 my ex just text me again good morning today . Even though he left me for his ex still text. but show.much he doesnt care. Not once has he asked how am.i doing jn this quarantine. Never ever talks about me or asks about my life. Just talks about HIM and his kids. I flew to Florida to see my daughter today and he asked if i boarded but has yet ask if i landed safe ..am i ok?? i could be in a damn swamp plane crashed and all and he doesnt show an ounce of care. All they r doing is keeping us trapped emotiina4lly and mentallym trapped As a hold me down . So they have a fall back. Because if they run into someone they truely want. They will def ghost us!! Fuck him!! Fuck them ladies. We need to reasert our value and give them.our absemce no excuses
@@Uncensoredwithsevynk Please move on. The honest truth they don't care! Can't make a person love you or care about if the person doesn't. The thing I'm.doing is moving on and encouraging myself. I Honestly thank God I'm not with mine. Anyone that care less about my well being is not worth the stress. If he didn't respect you in his presence MAKE HIM RESPECT YOU IN YOUR ABSENCE. Don't HELP HIM Don't BE HIS FALL BACK Don't BE HIS FRIEND. HES SHOWN He's NOT A FRIEND. ITS ALL ABOUT THE KIDS NOW. BETTER IS WAITING FOR YOU.
High value woman don't put up with "DISRESPECT!!" Value yourself ladies because your a diamond in the ruff.....
Crystal Fox 💯💯💯
BOOM💯💯QUEEN UP☝🏽☝🏽👑👑
100%
So true i agree. Ladies dont settle for less dont lower your standards. Dont allow no man to disrespect you when he disrespect you he dont care he dont love you no respect no relationship period and ladies respect and love yourselves more. Queens level up👑👍
You mean a diamond off the rip? Dont think a diamond in the ruff when you are a valuable gem period.
That's why it's always good to disappear when things go bad.
Works EVERY TIME, for me
Well, in my case I'd say my piece then dissapear. Ghosting is immature in some situations, and everyone just leaves without taking any responsibility
Mary Jones 💯🙋♀️
@@ilianam453 why u say it immature if it has been already communicated b4 ghosting
My current situation i dont care to see him or talk today. What he did on all days Mother's Day i am officially unavailable for anything he has to say to me. I usually will communicate after a miscommunication but he is DEAD to me . We have been friends since 2010 and dated these last three years and I am so done frfr
A Guy that loves you will notice your absence but a guy that was there only to use you will not give a shit about your absence.
100% factual. I have lived that life, till I rose up and finally said no more. Ever since I walked, I've had the such peace. Yes, it hurts at first, but better than hurting everyday.
Yep some of them will keep you on a roller coaster ride forever if you let them.
I left my ex husband of 11yrs and I loved him unconditionally but I loved me more.💋
Sending you love
@@sarahbouckhuyt538 Thank you 😊
Ladies!!! This man is absolutely right! Listen to his words carefully, plz. I am in a situation right now where i am getting disrespected because I gave unconditional love, sort of. Meaning, I let things slide tht I shouldn't have and I'm paying for it dearly now. How you ask, well, because he no longer respects my presence in this relationship and it shows. It shows in how he speaks to me, acts when I'm bothered about something and how he makes me feel unimportant. He crossed boundaries tht shouldn't have been crossed and instead of him learning from the mistake he took it as my value is decreased. Long story short know yr worth and stand yr ground.
Tonavishoup Sessoms same here what did you do though ? 😭
I'm in the same madness right now!!
Thx for sharing your truth because sooooo many ppl are not living their truth and it creates a cycle of ppl creating fake narratives for whatever reason. Now I'm not saying that some ppl aren't happy like they're proclaiming but if everyone is happy where do the hurt and broken ppl come from?! So again thx for sharing.
Same :(
But I was so garded in my other relationship and he didn't work so I thought I should be more open about my love and yet, didn't work. He left me with a text message... And I am actually relieved, sad, but relieved 🤷🏾♀️
So what did u do? Dumped him?
How many women have repeated themselves (needs, insecurities, pain, or concerns) nearly 1 million times and still went unheard? Your absence can not go unnoticed, it's too bright and too loud!!! Your presence is like rewarding bad/selfish/insensitive behavior.
@Humble Warrior I hear you and it's never a good thing to be biased to the point of being logically fallacious. I think that historically speaking and looking at the overarching system universally, women have been subjected to a lot of trauma and oppression. That's what you want to tie into the exploitation of women emotionally, socially, and physically. Women have higher rates of mental illness because of adding on the mood/internalizing disorders along with everything else that men are prone to. There are indubitably antisocial, abusive, and sociopathic/psychopathic women. In a majority of those cases childhood emotional and sexual abuse were present, usually cyclical family patterns.Even female prisoners' sentences were correlated with male affiliation. I could break it all down but for the sake of brevity, aggression, resource encroachment, poaching, and ability to kill on massive scales are traditionally male behaviors. And we now know that they were not solely for the purpose of providing for women.
thank you
You're definitely a genius.
XX GeneYes SAY IT LOUDER!!!
Yes
There ain't no coming back from that. If he lets me be absent or he is absent it's over. I ain't here to wait around on somebody to recognize my worth because he isn't going to.
You a fire sign?
RELLE. W She might be because I am and I feel the same way.
Yea
I didn't even bother giving reminders to the last one. I just up and left, when he got home, all my stuff was gone because I moved out and was done done.
YASS honey. Make them put some respect on your name.
👏👏👏
Super done.
So true. I am tired of disrespect. To quote Gina I rather be lonely than unhappy. And disrespected
It's not really unconditional love that makes women accept bad treatment. It's fear. Fear of losing him, abandonment, being alone, the agony of dopamine withdrawal and detachment.
Disrespect me and I’m dissin’ em OUT the door.
ABSENCE doesn’t make my heart grow fonder.... it makes my heart FORGET.💔
Yes indeed! I think I’m peeking in the door of “forget” now.
EXACTLY!!!
Abuse me, you lose me. Period!
A reminder that I am STILL on the right path ‼️‼️....RESPECT MY ABSENCE!!
I've walked many, many, times with the men I've dated. They never think you will and when you do walk they replace you very quickly with a weak woman just to try and 'proove' something. It's our job to leave them at the 'reduced items' end of the store where they all belong. 😆
Fr they replace you quickly with a pick me girl lol
Ladies ... we need to respect ourselves enough to offer consequences when we are disrespected. Dont be afraid to speak up or act.
He'll have no choice but to respect my abstinence, because it will be permanent✌
Abstinence or absence??😒
Don't use sex as a weapon.
O Bailey Both!😂
@@AlexandraDebbrosse 😉
Really Derrick?? Who is telling you what I need to hear?!!!
Brittney Denson GODTTT.
Literally
Cyan Simon yess! Mr. Jaxn walks with God. God knows what we women need to hear in 2020. Derrick is his messenger.
Brittney right!!! All in our Business like Big Brother is watching.
Kysha R lol and I love it. Stay in my business please!!
💥!!!! The more he values you, the more he will work to keep you. Don’t be thirsty..❤️ yourself first. Value you and others will follow. ❤️will find you.
He said I threw a “curveball” at him once I decided to end it and it was through text. That’s how much the “situationship” drained me. We actually lived together...We were also suppose to go to Florida on a trip but my gut was strong and it was saying no. It was a lot but still happy it’s over when I know I gave so many chances to a person I really lowered my standards for🤷🏾♀️ never again
Very impressive. Your strength and the generosity of sharing your story is inspirational. Thank you.
So happy for you! Go 'head chile😁
Exactly
Please consider continuing to share your experience regarding this? I find myself feeling anxious about my decision even though I know any “situation-ship” is a sign to move on.
Yeah sis...never again!!!!...boss up🌟💫
When he says she is not going nowhere he knows he can disrespect her!
I'm listening to this on repeat. Ain't nobody gonna do this to me again. I need to get this programmed in my head. 🔂
🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾
💯
I hurd that
You nailed it! I just left my bf because I’ve been wondering why he won’t publicly acknowledge he has a girlfriend. He’s a celebrity so I get it that he doesn’t want everyone in his business. But when he does interviews he answers like he’s single. I let him know about his behaviour and he got upset so I left him. Now he’s trying to reach me. He was warned if I felt disrespected again, I would leave so I did. It hurts because we almost been together 2 years and talked about the future. I will not be disrespected so he can cheat on me later. “When a person shows you who they are the first time, believe them.” ~ Maya A
Raise your value, women! We gotta put some value with self respect and love to ourselves so no man can destroy us. We can be happy with or without a man.
💯 Agree. You will know when enough is enough.
This is exactly where I’m at right now, I know he’s gonna respect me when I’m gone. The last thing I said to him was, “ you’re gonna regret treating me the way you did” and I meant every word because I knew then what I needed to do. GONE BABY GONE!!
My man literally always tell me "he can't afford to love me, he has never met someone like me, and that I mean everything to to him". I have seen him make soo many changes since first meeting him to actually becoming his girlfriend and even until now! He's constantly trying to "fine tune" himself be a better man so as to ensure the progression and longevity of our relationship ❣
I was the blame because I allowed it to go unchecked but not anymore !!!!!!💯💯Ty for the wisdom
I love this! I think where people get confused is in thinking loving someone unconditionally means suddenly not loving and respecting yourself - becoming a doormat, victim, or martyr.
Nope.
You can love someone AND walk away because you have healthy boundaries, which include self-respect.
Good work! An excellent therapist once told me that only children deserve unconditional love - adults must EARN. love through their actions.
I’ve never been the “she ain’t going nowhere type” n my ex realize that after 4 years, I ain’t settling n just accepting anything in the name of relationship
This is very true. I think it's time for me for someone to respect my absence.
NICOLE WHITLOCK girl I did that an he went an got another girl 30 days later lol NEVER look back. Readjusting my crown
I walked away from my ex he thought i was not going no where just stay i was not going to settle for disrespect im happy and blessed i made the right decision for me i love myself more. If a man disrespect you he dont love you or respect you dont settle respect yourself and move on period. Thank you Derrick God bless everyone.👏🙏
Was walking away hard?? I am struggling to ignore my ex after he keft me for his ex.
I literally left the same type of relationship, this New Year's. Good for us🌹
@@Uncensoredwithsevynk yes it was hard but work on yourself and it becomes eaiser. Men are logical. He knew exactly what he was doing. Make him regret losing you and that's with the power of absence (no contact rule)
@@Relle. so no contact??? Go straight ghost???
@@Relle. that man has so much ego and pride. He wld.neber regret losing me. Although i hv never ever gone silent. And he looks sooo good . So women be in him! But ok. I am going no contact . F it. I cant this. I am exhausted of feeling like plan b. thaaaank u
Thank for saving women's lives worldwide💓🤗
It spoke to me deeply when you said "when a man meets you he has to level up, he has to challenge himself, and he has to deal with his own demons...etc." that helped remind me that when men take their space its not to reject or abandon me. It's their time to regroup and deal with those matters that are so very personal.
I felt the urge to point that out, I do apologize for the interruption. 🙏
No need to apologize for an interruption! Lolz yes that was a key line for me as well. However, he could go distant for any number of reasons. But it really doesn’t matter what it is. What matters is that he’s not at your level, and definitely not worth your goodness
Damn, I had to make another comment! This is so deep and I felt this in my soul
I know that’s right!!! I definitely needed to hear this because I always feel like I’ve done something wrong when I know I haven’t. I have to know the power in my absence, respect means everything
Unfortunately, too many of my sisters don’t know their worth. The ones who know their worth did something different to get the results they wanted
👏🏽👏🏽
Did you just say "iced out bandaids?" Come through with the clever metaphors Bro. Jackson! This is so true. If you continuously forgive a person after trampling your boundaries and breaking your heart, they'll just keep losing respect for you. They think you're weak and pathetic. They may not say that in words, but their deeds will show it everytime.
The hard truth, these people will never admire you for being "resilient" To their bullshit.
Needs corrective surgery, not iced out bandaids......SPOT ON
Love you Derrick! Being single for so long has made me intolerable to disrespectful behavior. Just cut him OFF!
If a man isnt afraid to loose you you've already lost him. . If you ever make him feel you arent going anywhere he will keep with the bullshit ..
My man threatens the end of the relationship a lot when he doesn’t get his way, but my friend said the one threatening it is more scared to lose the relationship, so maybe my absence will mean something with him.
This right here..STRAIGHT FACTS!! Never cool to treat a person this way.
Exactly, sometimes I have to catch myself. I realized that I could really love someone and it be real and Still Understand that maybe they’re just not the one for me. I have a lot to look forward too I can’t slow myself to hold myself back because of emotions that don’t serve my greater purpose.
❤ your comment. Yes!
Queana Ivory Music I felt all of that!! 🙌🏾
A whole word. I'm right there with you sis.
"There's a built in respect to her absence off top!" YES!!! This Man has already put in the work and made the necessary changes. A woman or Man who's about business is definitely not about any games!! Derrick is spot on!!
Ladies this man knows what he is saying🗣 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
That woman made him put some respec on her name lol
I was the one that my ex thought I wasn't going anywhere.
Till one day I wasn't there anymore left him.
You just described the women I have became after my experiences. But now it doesnt even get that far. The "seeing shit for what it is" complex. Got me this far. Real talk!! Great message!
Unconditional love is not over tolerating disrespect or mistreatment
We teach men how to treat us by what we will or will not tolerate ✊❤️ keep your Self Respect high and your tolerance low
I don't give any conditional love.Ever since I've been living by that rule...ppl got their shit together around me!
Your so right, like that's was some real honest shit.
Wow 😮
Finite! Finally a man who knows we need to be refilled when we give love ❤️. Awesome 👏🏽 I’m impressed
This video is soooooo late 😂 but right on time this Coronavirus has people in the dms like ........SKKIIIIIIIRRTTTTT✋🏾 🛑 all jokes aside though I would even add it goes for friends as well not just romantic relationships SELF LOVE is the best LOVE 💕
Neicy "Self" Love all day, everyday!😉
You said a mouthful, "That's that button right there" ●Self love●
Sta Sea 🙌🏽yes conserve your energy and expel it only on those that are worth it otherwise you end up being drained.
Facts on facts
I give promises.. a real relationship should not have a million problems
Omg get out of my head! I needed to hear this, going through this exact thing right now. Thank you for validating my ABSENCE!❤
I got my copy "don't forget your crown". Thanks Derrick
Rita Asare is it an actual book? Like paper?
@@NataleeJT1985 kindle version
Rita Asare thank you for answering me💗
Derrick will pack so much knowledge in a short video. Amazing! This is what I do....I will say a very little. When it is near the end I will explain myself and what I desire. Lastly I am stone cold silent because I told you. Now I am not saying all men are like this but I notice if you talk and say I am leaving over and over it does not work but silence and absence works most times. People understand actions. They see that you value yourself. God bless you all stay safe.
Yes indeed, less talk more action.
Hey! That's Exactly what I Am doing and REFUSE to Settle for Less Than! 💯👑🙌🏾
I am only accepting Love that is True Authentic Real Faithful and Loyal
*The greatest happiness of life is the conviction that we are loved; loved for ourselves, or rather, loved in spite of ourselves.*
Fool me once shame on you!
Fool me twice shame on me!
God on point as usual. I've been with this guy for 4 years last Friday. He's younger than me and had so many problems that I didn't know about a lot stemming from how he was raised his mother is a narcissist and he had no role models. He had a drinking problem and an addiction to you know those videos. Anyhow I thought that he would change and for a while it did. Then came the verbal disrespect that he'd do when he was drunk that I'd let slide because it was the liquor and continued to give my all. Then it was the anger issues and I gave the excuse that it was his upbringing. Then it came the name calling. Nope. I should have stopped it a long time ago, always half azzed apologies and I can't change and I'm trying and it's hard. Ain't nothing to hard for a person to change if they want it bad enough. I changed my standards for this person, I lowered my expectations. I could have had anyone and had plenty of men at my beck and call why the hell did I stay so long. Smdh. He always knew I'd forgive him and take him back. Now I'm like Casper get yourself right I don't have time to raise a boy.
Yes correct a man or woman would never walk away from True Love. If they do, it was never true to begin with.
Putting yourself first isn't selfish it's an act of survival hope 2021 is filled with health safety happiness harmony consistency peace to all...😇🥰💝✌
Derrick, after years of mental and emotional abuse, I don't give reminders, I give ultimatums. It's my way or no way and he can hit the highway. That's what I learned from giving unconditional love, now I love myself and only I can make me happy.
Absolutely correct Jaxn! My husband of 10yrs gave me lots of BS, I moved country with our kids to pursue my career development. Now he is behaving, acting and thinking straight. All these were simply hard work to achieve when I was always forgiven.
LOOK, ITS THE JOKER!
This is my current situation. The man that I’m dealing with is emotionally unavailable and highly insecure. He’s slowly pushing me away because I’m tired of the disrespect and manipulation.
yup same happened with my ex he's the same way and he got into a rebound realationship smh so the best advice that I could give u is to leave because he's going to keep doing it block him and don't respond back to him be Casper 👻
Jasmine Miller Yes! I realize that I have tolerated too much. He will watch all of my stories on Facebook, but not even bother to send me a text saying, “hey, how are you?” or “hey, how’s your day going”. I’m not saying text me all the time, but at least from time to time simply communicate. The only time that he texts me is when he wants something. Every time (like an idiot) I have come running, but this time I won’t. I deserve better and it’s time to close this door. If I don’t, then I will regret it later.
TheTouchofklass look up assc direct on this
Jasmine Miller just go!
Your guy is a Narcissist. Type in Assc Direct on UA-cam. He’s a narc slayer and his videos are like Derrick’s..... On point!!!!! They ALL behave the same
You are speaking the truth! I love this. I have been that " she ain't going no where" woman so many times. Not happening this time. Thank god I found this.
Love is not a job.
I would just leave it ever I heard he is tired, he needs space, he cannot have they same feelings for me all they time.
And let him respect my absence forever.
You’re literally the best. Like you’re my mentor. Thank you for everything you do. I can’t wait to find the love of my life one day❤️
You are absolutely right!! I just had to do this and the man is doing more now that I have left him than he did when I was entertaining him. Straight Keith Sweat begging for me not to move on.....but I always mean what I say and say what I mean.
Do this instead: All people respect all people and their time - all the time. Teach your children that, then we don't need to re-teach adults simple courtesy and human respect.
Exactly
AMEN!👍
Literally almost cried watching this. Speaking facts.
Ive been watching and taking heed to your wisdom to fully heal. This was right on time today. Thank you!
Don't tolerate his bs. Years ago I was with a guy I loved n he disrespected me by talking to an ex who was so in love with him. He told me he knows I'll never leave him, I was appalled when he said that n i left that fool that same day n move on. He had no choice to go be with the other girl.
Mine actually told me "i know you're not going anywhere, you can't leave"! Few days ago he acted up because i didn't give him something he wanted. He went cold and gave me the silent treatment. I didn't bother and went a step further. I blocked and deleted him!! It's been 5 days now ..... Enjoying my peace and the goal is to move forward.... especially if he keeps acting unbothered. Have had enough!!
I really needed this at this moment! Thank you for such great advice 🥰
Thankful I'm still NEVER responding and moving forward...... with ME😉. NO contact and NO communication after betrayal for 19mo serves me well ☯😎👑🍷. Keep your crown💛
I swear, lately your videos have been right on point with my life!
"If you don't know that. Can't nobody help you". Very true 😢
I’ve always said this. I’m only 19 but i’ve never been afraid to leave someone alone lol friendships relationships etc
I'm starting to wonder if it would just be easier to be a lesbian.
😂😭
As a lesbian, I can 100% say that it's not easier. Women do this same sh*t
🤣🤣🤣
This is exactly my situation right now! How did you know..?
This was awesome! As I have said, a man will never marry a woman that he does not respect!
This is too funny to me because I kept screaming preach listening to this 🤣 🗣️ I'm so happy you found the one who made you respect her absence 🥰
JUST WHAT I NEEDED
I needed this! It came at the right time ... CONFORMATION!
Your amazing Derrick...Your family is so blessed to have you.
if he didnt respect your prescence, your absence wont matter !! most men dont wanna do the work, so they settle for whoever will!!