I worked with her at a tanning salon when we were younger. She never failed to make you smile and was so fun and goofy to be around. Nikki, If you’re reading this, please know that youre still stunning and I can tell you’ve still kept that sunshine personality through the years. Keep on keepin on, girl ❤️❤️
all the people in the comments clearly haven’t grown up with a mother who wasn’t fit to be a mother - the trauma i could have avoided if my mom wasn’t in my life is undeniable. no decision is easy but she put her daughters’ safety first. sending all the love to Nikki ❤️
Agree👍she is inteligent so she knows her limits and don't want people she rispect and love to suffer because of her choices.Respect👏Good bless her and show her the way🙏❤
Don't even pretend like you know what kind of mother anyone has by judging them from one post. Smh. Your reaction to an experience doesn't mean that everyone with a similar experience reacts as you do. How ignorant.
@Real Alignment Podcast perhaps, probably more than 1 has said it before but this channel is loaded with very unfit parents that fight very hard to maintain custody of their children while they are living the most terrible lives and subjecting their kids to the same dangers. If you watch this channel regularly you will hear lots of women tell tales about how they were raped or molested by people "in the life" their mother or father brought around. One of the first questions Mark asks is " tell me about your childhood" and it usually gets worse after that. That is the cycle repeating itself. The best way to avoid trouble is not to be there.
@@aesop4024 I agree my comment had nothing to do with poverty, but if you think one of the guys she's bringing around isn't going to try to f*** her 10-year-old daughter you got another thing coming those people pray on the hopeless people like the mom to get to their young daughters, that would allow it happen just to score some drugs
@@aesop4024 poverty doesn’t mean neglect but poverty is most often doing without or not having things that level the playing field like stability and safety.
She has DEEP unreleased pain. Her addiction to sex is actually a deep need for love and connection. Sex is a sacred energy transfer and she is taking energy from the men she has sex with, she is also addicted to that energy transfer. She feels alone and having sex makes her feel like she has someone in that moment, she craves deep connection but in an unhealthy magnetized way because of her trauma. Sex is THE most intimate and connecting practice. I understand her, I was once addicted to sex and I also have daddy issues because of my father. But all addictions are just an avoidance of deep hard feelings. The present moment is all that’s real and she just has so much unreleased pain. She feels alone and unloved. Nikki, you are SO loved, there is nothing wrong with you, you have just got to feel your feelings. Your addiction to sex is tearing you down because so many men have unhealed traumas and pain as well and when you have sex you’re literally trading energies, this is why you crave it more because it’s making you more and more not okay. Don’t mistake peace for boredom.
I don’t know if that knowledge came from schooling or if you acquired all of that knowledge on your own, but that was incredibly insightful. I actually saw some of the past Me in some of that. So thanks. 💞
She probably loves her, just doesn't know how to yet but hopefully will get there. I can imagine what a beautiful child she has. Good for dad's to be stepping up. Kudos
Refered to her daughter as her precious little angel but chose her life of debauchery over her. Make all the excuses you want but this is inexcusable. If you can't change to better yourself for your child you will never ever change for the best. It's just not in you
She doesent try to justify herself to anyone she judge herself also and thinks worst of herself but she is honest to herself and others.She knows she is broken and many of you judgeing her must learn if you don't understand because you can not know how is in others shoes ,you don't have to know but just accept people who they are and wish to God to show them the way🙏😘
I'm thinking her daughter is more apt to wonder why she chose this life over her rather than being grateful that she kept her from it. Everyone has their priorities though.
It is a combination of both. Some Therapist only have book knowledge, but a lack of life experience, so they can hardly understand their patients and therefore not help them.
As a daughter who had a mother who put herself first in most circumstances and lived a Peter Pan lifestyle, I can’t say we grow up to understand or have too much compassion for it.
It depends. Some kids romanticize it and seek connection to the absent parent by repeating their experience. I did some of that, and my parent did the same thing (only more so, because they never really had a relationship). It’s like a legend you carry on. I’ve seen that pattern on this show, too, especially when they have a street reputation that precedes you.
@@sciencenotstigma9534 I hear you. I emulated it a bit in my 20s. Have worked very hard to break the intergenerational cycles. It’s not easy and it’s not over yet.
I know right?!?! She just doesn't even notice some of the words coming out of her mouth! I wonder what her daughter thinks about her being so "nurturing!?!?"
I was ok with this chick, thinking about her childhood trauma and how it’s shaped her… until this comment from her. Yes her trauma is super relevant, she’s probably got borderline personality disorder from it. But ffs she needs to grow up. No one thinks your cool for giving shout outs to a murder 🙄
@Renee Baker Yeah, that part bugged me out cuz she said she didn’t even know him and she seemed to have no problem with her neighbor. That’s a weird shoutout to give.
I feel like she didn't want a better life for her daughter, but she just didn't want to be a mom so she could run around and do whatever she wants. Thank god for the father in this situation.
Yeah!? She brags about what’a nurturer she is though. I guess just only for random men. Which I got no problem with so long as your not making it effect your kids life.
@@myeyeswentdeaf6213 Pretty much boils down to selfishness. It's annoying bc if a man sat up there and said all that, he'd be a dirty dog deadbeat dad. Let's call a spade a spade. Kudos to ALL the single dad's, and in particular the father of her child.
I'd have more respect for her if she took care of her daughter. It's good she gave up her daughter for the better parents, but it's no "respect worthy" to abandon your kids.
@@cocopepe9234 where I'm coming from is she knew what she was doing. Well I respect her for being her authentic self more than anything even if it's hurting others, she's real and society has lost that. Yes she's f****ed up but really she's sacrificed her relationship with her daughter so she can be healthy happy and safe. Tell me really what's wrong with that.
While she seems nice & fun, she’s also so empty. It was disappointing when she didn’t even mention her daughter as being the best moment of her life, or losing her daughter as the lowest moment of her life. She’s just concerned with herself, only mentioning her daughter in the context of “hoping one day she’ll get why”…it’s like “yeah, mom…I totally understand you needed to brush me aside to live your selfish life”. 🙄
She´s still young.. it´s really bad but she may be able to be a mom once her kid is already grown.. but this happens with too many of us , and I say it because I am one of those people, not that I didn´t take care of my kid or didn´t do what I could, but I can clearly see that when I was younger , around 27-33 years old, I´d see focus too much on my needs due to emotional problems and even mood disorders which I was battling without much support.. so yeah.. way more responability is needed in order to raise our kids.. even the parents that apparently are really there and seem almost perfect.. there are so many things we must learn in life before it´d even make sense to think it´s ok to bring a life into this world. But I understand that we´re only talking about being able to actually being a mother , phisically caring, for our children.. still..nothing is basic when it comes to our own children because they´ll grow in this world and we know what happens if we don´t grow up in a safe, loving and nourishing environment, and that involves more, in my opinion, than what we do up to now, as I believe there should even be laws that regulate who are allowed and not allowed to have kids. yeah I do think so.. Since the system rules such a huge chunck of our lives, I think this one would be very useful in so many aspects... but well, who would make money on that uh not too many people.. so it won´t ever happen , unfortunately. Here in Brazil kids grow with such a silly mindset, like in some other countries, of course ..and it makes me kinda sad to see it but happy to have been able to raise my kid outside this model and even outside any model , as he grew up traveling the world with me and his stepdad ,and was homeschooled. Any of this was perfect, but he became an independent young man at an young age , a free spirit althought this matrix does swallow eveyone without exception I guess, one way or another, so I talk to my son who is now almost 25 , about the important things and so that he doesn´t forget who he is in order to fit in.. Mark, your channel is wonderful, everyday when I wake up it´s what I watch with my coffee, and as sad as many interviews can be, I think that after a while watching it starts to become enriching instead of just some toxic morning content for our minds.. you´re one beautiful soul and I´d love to do what you do but being a woman I guess it´d be way harder hahah love to you all
@@soraiacristinadiaspavesi8128 Thanks for your response, good or bad, but I did not read it…gotta keep it brief! No need to disclose your life story to sell a point.
She’s very immature and shallow. She needs to grow up. I feel like I could relate to her if I was in my 20s but I’m 35 (very close in age to her) so I can’t relate and she annoys me. I have 2 girls and I would never give them up so I could wild out. She could change her life for the better and it’s sad that her daughter didn’t give her the motivation to do so.
Maybe a bit of bipolar here. She says she's a nurturer and that makes sense. But nurture your baby girl. It will be more fulfilling. More exciting. She needs a real diagnosis.
I had shitty parents too I call bullshit - get a therapist and take responsibility for your mental health. You are good at making excuses. Don’t assume your daughter will understand. My mother did the same thing - she was and still is a selfish women. I am a psych RN now. Go get help immediately Nikki. Sounds like you may need medications to stabilize.
XD Despite the fact that mother Teresa was a sick btch who abused poor and sick people AND twisted entire fairytales out of it, This comment is funny af lol
Great videos Mark! I get song writing musical 🎵 inspirations while watching. So many interesting stories, yet so different. You’re the best. Thanks for giving so many a voice .
I guarantee your 10 year old daughter isn’t going to be “happy” you left her bc you chose to be a stripper and live the “wild life.” Every child needs their mother; so selfish and sad. 😔
For once a parent admits their child is better off with someone more stable Maybe the kid will be happy she did not bring some of her lovers around the house. Do you not watch these videos? Many 10-year-old girls get fucked by their mother's "friends " and spiral downward afterward. Does the question "tell me about your childhood" sound familiar?
The threshold for what constitutes a decent person seems to be comically low in the SWU comments sections. If there was ever an example of what a morally bankrupt person is, this female fits the bill. She literally values 'getting dick' over parenting her child.
I really liked her. Her personality, honesty, everything. She exudes strength and vulnerability at the same time and thats truly a rarity. I wish her nothing but the best and hope for a follow-up one day 🥰
IMO Nikki is so very very desperate to be loved! She’s addicted to attention and seems completely empty emotionally. She reminds me a little bit of how I was when I was younger. I’m also an ex speed addict, ADHD, an ex erotic dancer, and a SA surviver. She seems like she’s running away from her very own world of pain. She looks like she’s still taking meth regularly and I’m heartbroken thinking about the crash that’s going to hit her soon. Her mask is slipping, just as it does for everyone, and I feel like crying thinking about the massive wall of regret and anguish that’s coming. The people that have used and abused her, especially when she was a child, should spend their lives in gaol. I wish that I was Nikkis mother and that I could give her some of the love that she needs. ❤️
What u said is true. The mask is off, I'm depressed as hell. Was using cause of past childhood traumas. Dealing with the reality now. I'm depressed and very suicidal. I messed up my youth. I could have had a better life. I wish I didn't cheat on my husband. It was fun and games until I fell inlove @36 years old. And he dumped me, I found God and dealing with all the traumas. OmG I'm dying
@@ginalion9858 keep remembering that the suicidal thoughts after coming off using are part of your brain resetting itself. This too shall pass. You do have a purpose here even if you can’t see it right now. One day, one hour, one minute at a time. Sending love ♥️
My condolences to everything you ladies had to go through. My hearts breaks for each of you. Thank you for sharing and posting. While reading your informative comments, I can see all your wisdom, support & empathy for fellow survivors. Sending you ladies love , prayers and hugs. 🤍🙏🏽🌼
What she needs to understand is that she has a shelf life. And at some point soon, if not right now, men will put up with her chaos less and less, and her choices will become less and less desirable. She doesn't seem like the quintessential meth head to me, but it may be because her personality has a little more than a sunshine aspect to it. A good part of it seems to have a real Bimbo aspect to it. If she turns a blind eye to that "Massive wall of regret " she could easily take a path that is very common where people go deeper into the realm of more and more. More drugs, more often, more powerful drugs, deeper and deeper into the weeds of society into more and more toxic and incarceration likely environments. She's sober right now, but admittedly she can't find meth. Who can't find meth? Meth will find her? I think that she seems to have decent intelligence, but the blind eye she has turned to the fact that using sex "work" has afforded her a buffer to the harsher realities of life than she realizes is where the Bimbo in her rears her care free head. Also, women that use their bodies to make money are prone to the chaos. Even when they have it as good as it gets, they tend to do things that cause them to be shown the door, and they can't figure out why someone is being a jerk to them. I agree she "seeks attention" .... foe all the wrong reasons, in all the wrong places. Her childhood is a huge factor, if not the root. Born of chaos, seeks chaos. Is chaos. And she never mentions her chaos, other than to say, very simply, she cheats. Which the only reason she brings up this one chaotic fault ... is for attention to say, " see what my ****y can do. Good luck.
Give a man cheap sex, decent food, a monthly salary, and cheap entertainment, and he will throw his ambitions right out the window. The comfort zone is the cemetery of dreams. “comfort addiction,” occurs any time someone complains about his job or life, yet never makes a change. People who suffer from comfort addiction are addicted to the comfort level they're currently at - even if they claim they don't like their current job or situation.
Very true, but suprisly comfort addiction and the ability to keep it going is the American dream, own a house, have your money make your money.. enough money to do what you want in reason.. thats most peoples goal.. actually attaining it is quite difficult, were you dont have to work and you can still just live a comfortable mediocrity... The people who strive for something more or different, are seen as abnormal... The whole thing with this lifestyle that these people live on this channel is the end result of striving for something different, but it normally ends it a worse case, its very few people who actually accomplish their dreams and desires, people who dont settle for mediocrity wind up becoming drug addicts, or other negetive lifestyles when they eventually fail at what they strive for... Because they wont accept mediocrity.... So they implode and self destruct.. its the fear of the loss of comfort that keeps people from going erratic.. like they say, when you have nothing, you have nothing to lose..
Right!?! But hey, it's what she know's & it's more than that... people who experience childhood trauma usually have some deep seeded shit that rears it's ugly head at some point in their life and it comes out in different ways. Even people.who experience trauma may not even understand "why" they are like that until they start doing some work, hard work and start moving away from that old "bad familiarity"
Her justification of not having her daughter, seen as a positive, in retrospect, due to her hanging out with a sex offender / murderer seemed off to me. Not judging - I get what she is trying to say - but it def stood out most to me. I wish her well.
Nikki, I don't know if you will see this, but I'm in my forties, and my mother committed suicide when I was nine, and my father was often either emotionally abusive or absent. From a man who basically grew up without his parents, please, take some of the money that you might spend on other things, and get some good therapy, and some healing for yourself. Then, get back in touch with your daughter. She needs you.
So the claim is an "empath".... that abandons their own child... because they like sex and likes scumbags with neck tats. So flippant about the child abandonment. The only respect I have left is for the fact that this person can at least admit they were about to repeat the same pattern as their mother.... Too bad it's at the child's expense either way. How cute.
It's so weird that she acts like she had to give up her daughter or put her through a lot of difficulties when in reality she could also choose to just take care of her daughter without exposing her to abuse or whatever she is worried to expose her to.
@@johnnybiggunz1141 my mother never got married or had a man come over to our house after divorcing my father. She was worried about bringing in a stranger to our home since we were 2 girls. Not saying that you should never have a relationship after a divorce, but there are different options
It’s not a square life when you’re missing a parent. Her daughter most likely harbors so much frustration towards her mom and that’s sad. Nothing but excuses from someone who never fully developed.
It's sad because she chose the lifestyle over her child. So much more I could say, but I won't. This is coming from someone that's been thru it too. I've not lived a charmed life, but am grateful for every day. I really hope she gets everything sorted 4 her child's sake.
I just hope the child is happy, with or without her. I think kids prefer stability and structure. If the mom can’t provide that, then the kid is probably better off without her. Hopefully, the dad is doing a better job.
I agree....It's heartbreaking when a parent uses the excuse they gave their kid up to give them a better life,when the truth is they're to selfish to give up there lifestyle to keep there kids !
It's s not sad. She recognized that her husband was the safer choice. This channel is filled with people who were broken because their parents tried to bring them along with them.
@@aesop4024 Exactly! What she did was actually the best possible outcome considering how everyone else on this channel was raised. Thank God for the kid’s dad.
So you guys think the child just stopped needing her at age 5? Imagine if you were the little girl and you were 5 and your mom was like,"Yeah, I'm no no longer good for you. It's me not you. You just don't fit into my lifestyle anymore".The best thing to do would be for her to get into therapy, stop those bad habits because honestly she's better than that. I feel like she deserves better and so does the little girl. Would y'all have the same opinion if it was a man sitting up there saying all that?
We all have trauma and shame in our lives however I feel too many people use this as an excuse to continue on the path they want to take....example...Im heroic because I did the responsible thing and had my daughter go with her dad. Ask her kid if it was. I deal with this same thing with my son whose daughter would love him to be in her life. The bottom line is these people do not want to take the responsibility to handle their reponsibilities. And we let them get away with it. While dont have the answer to fix this...I for sure see the damage left behind. I grew up in a broken household myself...luckily my parents both stepped up...now was it 50/50 no but my folks just pushed on with their responsibilities. As a middle age person the biggest thing I see is we allow people to excuse responsibilities.
I wonder if she's had any therapy. She wants her daughter to be square, yet she doesn't want the same for herself. I've never heard anyone else say they knew they'd do sex work when they were young. It's sad, honestly. "I'm a nurturer." Except for her daughter. Thank God for her ex stepping up.
Heartbreaking how she says she knew from a young age that her career was going to be serving men’s sexual desires in some form. Also how she describes her “love language” as being everything a man wants. Mothers PLEASE show your daughters how to appreciate their true worth🥺❤️
Cause she likes men an wants to please them knowing so since a kid so what she's some how wrong for that? So I guess I'm also wrong for wanting to take care an please the women I love knowing I'd want to since a young man or that just doesn't work for men or I wanna serve a women over myself an family don't make men the villain cause she wants to be a sex addict we all make our own choices in life boo hoo
@@taylorhill4362 I’m definitely not shaming her CHOICES. I’m expressing the sadness behind her NOT knowing her WORTH. Meaning I’m sure she has a brain but no one ever taught her that it was worth showing off. Shut up.
@@ashleygamboa5649 Lol so she doesn't know her own worth cause she likes sex an pleasing men you just have a baseless opinion that is pretty much shaming her she can be what she wants an doesn't need someone like yourself to say oh well it's sad oh well I feel bad for her cause etc etc like huh she doesn't so why should you ? Know your worth an mental capacity cause to tell someone to simply shut up shows your lack of communication skills Honey you're backhanded disrespectful for feeling sorry for her like somethings so wrong with her TF
All I Heard in the video was I’m a selfish shitty mom but it’s because I’m a victim so I’m gonna try and justify it to the world and hope that my daughter will see that I’m not such a bad mother
She is still a young child who is yearning for love and connection. People who are addicted to sex most likely aren’t addicted to the feeling but the glimmer of connection and validation you get for a moment. Niki I hope one day you realize that you ARE worthy of love and you can find that love and connection within yourself.
I agree with you, wholeheartedly. Sex addiction is an inaccurate term to describe what most women (and probably some men) go through. People get confused, because they first get this kind of attention when discovering their sexuality (which does feel good, physically). But it’s your partner’s reaction to your sexual response (or sexual acts) that you chase after again and again. I never went with an unattractive trick to try to have a physical response with him. It was generally physically revolting, or just neutral if they were clean and polite. What felt nice was the praise and his positive response to me. I wouldn’t say I sought out that line of work for that. I was used in it, to make money for an adult. Then had limited skills to make money for myself, having a 6th grade education. Still, it was something I got out of it that was kind of hard to leave, at times. You have a little fan club of regulars, even though a lot of men were hateful and disrespectful and you never wanted to see them again, for any reason. A lot of people don’t get much notice. Offering sex gets you noticed. Usually, in ways you don’t want, but it’s more of a human connection than none, which is a too-common experience. A lot of people feel like if they ceased to exist, no one would notice. It’s alienation, more than anything, to me.
@@jennross6466 Mark Laita did an interview on the UA-cam Channel Koncrete. In the interview he said many of the interviews he can’t use. The individuals just can’t communicate well. These interviewees are traumatized and full of sadness and pain, but they don’t have the gifts of charisma and communication. I have no doubt Nikki has deep sadness and pain from the multiple forms of abuse she has suffered. However, her charisma and ability to communicate allows her to be a spokesperson for all the traumatized, suffering people. People who aren’t charismatic or communicative, but, like all of us, are the walking-wounded of the Earth.
Whether you agree with her lifestyle or not I’m proud of her for owning her mistakes and having the wisdom to give her daughter to her ex husband. She’s aware she’s a mess and loves her daughter enough to not subject her to that life even if that means she won’t have a relationship with her. That’s admirable and I’m wishing her the best
@@ScottyPippen maybe it’s because of how I was raised but I wish my mother had enough sense to give me and my siblings to a better suited family member from the start. Eventually my uncle did raise us which kept me from ending up like Nikki but we still have the trauma. I’m just saying if you know you’re a bad parent don’t inflict your bad habits on to an innocent child
@@ScottyPippen seriously! Some of society has shifted into thinking because you own your mistakes it absolves from the wrongdoing and makes you a hero. No, you are still a piece of crap. Personally I like Nikki and her story but when you are up there airing your dirty laundry on the internet like that it's almost guaranteed that her daughter will see this at some point in her life which brings a sad reality to the story as well.
I'm on the fence on this one. I admire her strength, but her ability/inability to be a parent is a major thing for me. I struggle when she says she has to choose this life because of trauma, but you don't. Its a choice at the end of the day, but you can avoid bringing children into the mix. And as others have said below, her 10 year old daughter will see this and not see a woman who had to do this, but a woman who walked out because her lifestyle with kids is not the one she wanted. She is too selfish in many ways, one would even say narcissistic.
She's so narcissistic that she actually sees herself as the "hero" for dipping out on her little girl. NO, you are not a hero. A hero would've CHANGED their lifestyle to accommodate their child. Period. End of story.
@@esskayybee642 she is very "nurturing" got me. I always have an open mind, at least I try my hardest to. But you have a 10 year old daughter who will question your "nurturing" ways with everyone in life, Except for her. And on yt to replay and share for all her family and friends for years to come. Selfish as far as I can tell.
I see the comments about her not being there for her daughter but there are also dad’s that leave their kids with the mother and go mess around in the streets as well. She did what she thought was best for her kid’s safety and even though it’s not the best decision,sometimes people are in SURVIVAL MODE. It doesn’t matter whether you’re male or female, spare your kids the heartache and don’t have children if you’re not ready to put their needs before your own or aren’t emotionally mature to be there for them. In this case, she did that to the BEST OF HER ABILITIES AND TRAUMA RESPONSES. I respect Nikki’s honesty. I hope that she works through her trauma and gets therapy. There are too many people on this channel getting interviewed who basically gave up on themselves and say “I’m addicted to (insert here) and that’s WHO I AM”. Their addiction becomes their IDENTITY. It doesn’t have to be that way! ONE CAN CHANGE IF THEY WANT TO!!❤️ Go back to school NiKKi. COMMIT TO YOUR GOALS THE SAME WAY YOU COMMIT TO YOUR BASIC NEEDS. You can do it!! You’re only 33!!
@@sallyann985 If she didn’t care about her kid, she could have dragged her along with the tricks in and out the room, for the check. Or a whole lot worse. If all you can do is get that child to a better environment, praise to anyone who does that. I bet you would say, “At least leave your baby at a hospital or store. Don’t throw him in the dumpster.” But when people in crisis bring a child to a safe place, it’s not good enough, either? Attitudes like yours contribute to infanticide, because people are so ashamed they try to hide the fact that they were ever pregnant. At least this woman was honest, and took some responsibility.
I hope you get therapy. Please don't just assume your daughter will understand your lifestyle, chances are she won't. Yeah most people don't understand what abuse can do to a person, but there is people out there who don't cope in maladaptive ways. Please get help, and please go see your daughter. She deserves to have you in her life.
I appreciate her candor. She's all over the place, though. I'm deathly afraid of how my children will view me. Her daughter will definitely watch this at some point. I think she does have a degree of regret in not reaching out to her child that is eating her alive.
Time to grow up and get yourself together for yourself and your daughter! She acts like a teenager. My heart breaks for her daughter. I doubt her daughter will ever thank her for anything.
Pretty sure her 10 year old daughter will have a few questions after she watches this. It will probably be a devastating experience for her but thats life. Always interesting, thanks!
I think people need to tell their story or how can we fix things?Sorry thing hurt your sensibilities!Maybe you think she should forget about the what made her?There is NOTHING wrong with Nikki that she should hide.
I know it is easy to be an armchair therapist, but trying to find men that replicates her image of her father is pretty textbook. So is finding those men and trying to have a successful relationship, thus finally correcting the wrong she experienced in her childhood. She says that she doesn't know why she's attracted to the chaos, but if that is what is familiar to you than that is what you seek. Even when it's to your own detriment. Fixing the childhood traumas and finally recognizing and reconciling with it is the answer to being free of it.
I worked with her at a tanning salon when we were younger. She never failed to make you smile and was so fun and goofy to be around. Nikki, If you’re reading this, please know that youre still stunning and I can tell you’ve still kept that sunshine personality through the years. Keep on keepin on, girl ❤️❤️
Lovely!
That's super cool. I can appreciate Nikkis complete transparency! I bet she was a fun spirit to work with.
She does seem like a fun person to chill with.
That’s what’s sad. She seems like she’s charismatic for sure but she doesn’t know anything but bad habits and self destructive behavior.
How old were you and her now? Im judt curious as to what ppl look like at my age of 27 😑😔
all the people in the comments clearly haven’t grown up with a mother who wasn’t fit to be a mother - the trauma i could have avoided if my mom wasn’t in my life is undeniable. no decision is easy but she put her daughters’ safety first. sending all the love to Nikki ❤️
Agree👍she is inteligent so she knows her limits and don't want people she rispect and love to suffer because of her choices.Respect👏Good bless her and show her the way🙏❤
Don't even pretend like you know what kind of mother anyone has by judging them from one post. Smh. Your reaction to an experience doesn't mean that everyone with a similar experience reacts as you do. How ignorant.
There’s some poor broken hearted tuba player crying his eyes out after hearing her say that she didn’t really care about his marching band video 😭😭😭
🤣🤣🤣🤣
Life happens 🙄
Lol!!!
I thought the same thing!
😂😂😂
What a sick world we live in that our main concern has to be that our kids don't get molested!
Yes lord 🙏 it is.
Well....if you choose sex as a job you are choosing a SICK WORLD
That is absolutely my main concern 😔
At least we are concerned! There are people who aren’t…
For once a parent admits her/his child is better off with someone else more stable.
@Real Alignment Podcast perhaps, probably more than 1 has said it before but this channel is loaded with very unfit parents that fight very hard to maintain custody of their children while they are living the most terrible lives and subjecting their kids to the same dangers. If you watch this channel regularly you will hear lots of women tell tales about how they were raped or molested by people "in the life" their mother or father brought around. One of the first questions Mark asks is " tell me about your childhood" and it usually gets worse after that. That is the cycle repeating itself. The best way to avoid trouble is not to be there.
@@yarly3180 Poverty doesn't mean neglect.
@@aesop4024 I agree my comment had nothing to do with poverty, but if you think one of the guys she's bringing around isn't going to try to f*** her 10-year-old daughter you got another thing coming those people pray on the hopeless people like the mom to get to their young daughters, that would allow it happen just to score some drugs
They say it often on this channel.
@@aesop4024 poverty doesn’t mean neglect but poverty is most often doing without or not having things that level the playing field like stability and safety.
She has DEEP unreleased pain. Her addiction to sex is actually a deep need for love and connection. Sex is a sacred energy transfer and she is taking energy from the men she has sex with, she is also addicted to that energy transfer. She feels alone and having sex makes her feel like she has someone in that moment, she craves deep connection but in an unhealthy magnetized way because of her trauma. Sex is THE most intimate and connecting practice. I understand her, I was once addicted to sex and I also have daddy issues because of my father. But all addictions are just an avoidance of deep hard feelings. The present moment is all that’s real and she just has so much unreleased pain. She feels alone and unloved. Nikki, you are SO loved, there is nothing wrong with you, you have just got to feel your feelings. Your addiction to sex is tearing you down because so many men have unhealed traumas and pain as well and when you have sex you’re literally trading energies, this is why you crave it more because it’s making you more and more not okay. Don’t mistake peace for boredom.
wow! you sound like you have done some serious inner work, thank you for that analogy of Nikki's story! sounds like truth.
I appreciate your message to Nikki…I’m going to take this message for myself too. Thank you 🙏 God bless.
I don’t know if that knowledge came from schooling or if you acquired all of that knowledge on your own, but that was incredibly insightful. I actually saw some of the past Me in some of that. So thanks. 💞
So insightful. She could use some trauma counseling for sure.
I think giving her daughter to the father was a wise decision for her, I think she loves herself more , I hope her daughter has a lovely life ❤️
She probably loves her, just doesn't know how to yet but hopefully will get there. I can imagine what a beautiful child she has. Good for dad's to be stepping up. Kudos
Refered to her daughter as her precious little angel but chose her life of debauchery over her. Make all the excuses you want but this is inexcusable. If you can't change to better yourself for your child you will never ever change for the best. It's just not in you
I could not agree more. Right on the money
Exactly correct! She doesn't acknowledge the damage she is doing to her daughter! This lady literally is only about herself and that's it!
She didn't even say her daughter is the best part of her life! Wow..
She’s unfit to be a parent and she made the best choice possible for her circumstances. I’m thankful her child has a stable parent to live with.
She doesent try to justify herself to anyone she judge herself also and thinks worst of herself but she is honest to herself and others.She knows she is broken and many of you judgeing her must learn if you don't understand because you can not know how is in others shoes ,you don't have to know but just accept people who they are and wish to God to show them the way🙏😘
She’s gonna realize one day that she wasted her life on shit that wasn’t important, and neglected the one person that mattered.
Amen 🙏
nah she going to hades world bro
@@punchito brother, she's going to ascend to Olympus
@@punchito Being saved is not about works.
You wish.
I'm thinking her daughter is more apt to wonder why she chose this life over her rather than being grateful that she kept her from it. Everyone has their priorities though.
Exactly.
🙏 amen
Exactly!
For sure it all hurts in the end hope her dad is really good to her❤
Her: I need a similar soul.
Me: You need a therapist.
1000% Most definitely
And to grow the f up
This is the comment that has made more sense..I get where she’s coming from but she ain’t fooling me..
It is a combination of both. Some Therapist only have book knowledge, but a lack of life experience, so they can hardly understand their patients and therefore not help them.
💀
As a daughter who had a mother who put herself first in most circumstances and lived a Peter Pan lifestyle, I can’t say we grow up to understand or have too much compassion for it.
It depends. Some kids romanticize it and seek connection to the absent parent by repeating their experience. I did some of that, and my parent did the same thing (only more so, because they never really had a relationship). It’s like a legend you carry on. I’ve seen that pattern on this show, too, especially when they have a street reputation that precedes you.
@@sciencenotstigma9534 I hear you. I emulated it a bit in my 20s. Have worked very hard to break the intergenerational cycles. It’s not easy and it’s not over yet.
Because you grew up and are an adult and decent human being, you understand there is no excuse to not grow up and put the children you conceive first.
nor should you” hope you have overcome
“He killed my neighbor. Shoutout to Flaco!”
I mean, wtf?🤷♂️
Word
@Amber Adams. Ya know? She doesn’t even know the friggin guy. Either she nuts or that was a real shitty neighbor.
I know right?!?! She just doesn't even notice some of the words coming out of her mouth! I wonder what her daughter thinks about her being so "nurturing!?!?"
I was ok with this chick, thinking about her childhood trauma and how it’s shaped her… until this comment from her. Yes her trauma is super relevant, she’s probably got borderline personality disorder from it. But ffs she needs to grow up.
No one thinks your cool for giving shout outs to a murder 🙄
@Renee Baker Yeah, that part bugged me out cuz she said she didn’t even know him and she seemed to have no problem with her neighbor. That’s a weird shoutout to give.
I feel like she didn't want a better life for her daughter, but she just didn't want to be a mom so she could run around and do whatever she wants. Thank god for the father in this situation.
🎯
I agree and it's sad because her little girl needs her mom.
Yeah!? She brags about what’a nurturer she is though. I guess just only for random men. Which I got no problem with so long as your not making it effect your kids life.
🕉🕉🕉
@@myeyeswentdeaf6213 Pretty much boils down to selfishness. It's annoying bc if a man sat up there and said all that, he'd be a dirty dog deadbeat dad. Let's call a spade a spade. Kudos to ALL the single dad's, and in particular the father of her child.
More respect to her for letting the dad have the daughter and she's safe.
Much respect for giving up your kid because you want to live a selfish life? LMAO. WTAF
I'd have more respect for her if she took care of her daughter. It's good she gave up her daughter for the better parents, but it's no "respect worthy" to abandon your kids.
@@cocopepe9234 where I'm coming from is she knew what she was doing. Well I respect her for being her authentic self more than anything even if it's hurting others, she's real and society has lost that. Yes she's f****ed up but really she's sacrificed her relationship with her daughter so she can be healthy happy and safe. Tell me really what's wrong with that.
Find a normal guy please. The bad boys won't give you what you need to lead a stable life
‘Shout out to Flaco”……..to a murderer?Wow, she needs to grow TF up.
I agree. She's a little annoying
Her ex husband is a drug abusive but let her daughter live with him and said her daughter is having the picit fence make it make sense.
I agree 💯%. What a freaking loser
I thought she meant her neighbor was named flaco
@@Ashleyiza She's trying to impress Mark and us. Nope sorry.🤣
While she seems nice & fun, she’s also so empty. It was disappointing when she didn’t even mention her daughter as being the best moment of her life, or losing her daughter as the lowest moment of her life. She’s just concerned with herself, only mentioning her daughter in the context of “hoping one day she’ll get why”…it’s like “yeah, mom…I totally understand you needed to brush me aside to live your selfish life”. 🙄
Do anything a gen z does surprise you? Almost every young adult acts like that, like we created a generation of sociopaths
@@emilylouden3349 She’s a millennial 😩
She´s still young.. it´s really bad but she may be able to be a mom once her kid is already grown.. but this happens with too many of us , and I say it because I am one of those people, not that I didn´t take care of my kid or didn´t do what I could, but I can clearly see that when I was younger , around 27-33 years old, I´d see focus too much on my needs due to emotional problems and even mood disorders which I was battling without much support.. so yeah.. way more responability is needed in order to raise our kids.. even the parents that apparently are really there and seem almost perfect.. there are so many things we must learn in life before it´d even make sense to think it´s ok to bring a life into this world. But I understand that we´re only talking about being able to actually being a mother , phisically caring, for our children.. still..nothing is basic when it comes to our own children because they´ll grow in this world and we know what happens if we don´t grow up in a safe, loving and nourishing environment, and that involves more, in my opinion, than what we do up to now, as I believe there should even be laws that regulate who are allowed and not allowed to have kids. yeah I do think so.. Since the system rules such a huge chunck of our lives, I think this one would be very useful in so many aspects... but well, who would make money on that uh not too many people.. so it won´t ever happen , unfortunately. Here in Brazil kids grow with such a silly mindset, like in some other countries, of course ..and it makes me kinda sad to see it but happy to have been able to raise my kid outside this model and even outside any model , as he grew up traveling the world with me and his stepdad ,and was homeschooled. Any of this was perfect, but he became an independent young man at an young age , a free spirit althought this matrix does swallow eveyone without exception I guess, one way or another, so I talk to my son who is now almost 25 , about the important things and so that he doesn´t forget who he is in order to fit in.. Mark, your channel is wonderful, everyday when I wake up it´s what I watch with my coffee, and as sad as many interviews can be, I think that after a while watching it starts to become enriching instead of just some toxic morning content for our minds.. you´re one beautiful soul and I´d love to do what you do but being a woman I guess it´d be way harder hahah love to you all
@@soraiacristinadiaspavesi8128 Thanks for your response, good or bad, but I did not read it…gotta keep it brief! No need to disclose your life story to sell a point.
@@soraiacristinadiaspavesi8128 she is not young at all
She’s very immature and shallow. She needs to grow up. I feel like I could relate to her if I was in my 20s but I’m 35 (very close in age to her) so I can’t relate and she annoys me. I have 2 girls and I would never give them up so I could wild out. She could change her life for the better and it’s sad that her daughter didn’t give her the motivation to do so.
Maybe a bit of bipolar here. She says she's a nurturer and that makes sense. But nurture your baby girl. It will be more fulfilling. More exciting. She needs a real diagnosis.
I had shitty parents too
I call bullshit - get a therapist and take responsibility for your mental health. You are good at making excuses. Don’t assume your daughter will understand. My mother did the same thing - she was and still is a selfish women. I am a psych RN now. Go get help immediately Nikki. Sounds like you may need medications to stabilize.
Most definitely. She's going to end up in big trouble
Best interview ever! Thank you Nikki and Mark.
Very good interview. I like how open she is about everything, and how articulate she is in telling her story.
I just hope she can find her worth
Is she's low key an empath, then I'm low key mother Teresa
@@aliceschmid9697 I was being sarcastic. I don't get it either
XD
Despite the fact that mother Teresa was a sick btch who abused poor and sick people AND twisted entire fairytales out of it,
This comment is funny af lol
@@aliceschmid9697 Low-key means on the down low, no cap.
Then I’m low key a genius
@@aliceschmid9697 Low-key: to some extent.
I laughed when Mark thought she meant crack when she said “she loves hard.” He knows all the lingo now after all these interviews. Lmao
Wait I missed that 😩😭😭😭
@@kierrademus8092 18:54 is where it happens
@@kris9259 I end up listening 😭😭😭😭😭
I wondered how she could walk around with $3000 and didn’t leave but waited to get fined so she could not have money to buy a burger??🤔
Before I even start the video, just wanna say. . Love your vids mark !
Great videos Mark! I get song writing musical 🎵 inspirations while watching. So many interesting stories, yet so different. You’re the best. Thanks for giving so many a voice .
Will never understand how you can bring a child into the world and then abandon them ...
Yes, just please use protection
Does anyone else fast forward to the still shot then watch the whole video just so you know what you’re working with? I can’t be the only one 😂
Ha! Never thought to do that that, but it makes sense to me. Next time!
I do it every video....
But idgi you can see them in the video right away anyway
EVERYtime. Mark didn’t anticipate that being a genius move
I guarantee your 10 year old daughter isn’t going to be “happy” you left her bc you chose to be a stripper and live the “wild life.” Every child needs their mother; so selfish and sad. 😔
I agree 100%
My thoughts exactly
For once a parent admits their child is better off with someone more stable Maybe the kid will be happy she did not bring some of her lovers around the house. Do you not watch these videos? Many 10-year-old girls get fucked by their mother's "friends " and spiral downward afterward. Does the question "tell me about your childhood" sound familiar?
Maybe, but life can be complicated. Easier to judge than understand
Truth.
Great interview. She knows she’s a mess and is no bullshit about it. Bless her
sad really
@@julz9378 but there ain’t shit you can say about it. She embraces it
I hope she knows she needs help. I hope she takes this to somewhere healthier
Lol at all these people saying this woman “has strength!”
The threshold for what constitutes a decent person seems to be comically low in the SWU comments sections. If there was ever an example of what a morally bankrupt person is, this female fits the bill. She literally values 'getting dick' over parenting her child.
Right
So much strength she abandons her daughter.
@@Hi-bl8rm so much strength she is a slave to her vices. She literally cannot control them.
@@BGFitnessNY yeah she can she doesn’t want to.
I really liked her. Her personality, honesty, everything. She exudes strength and vulnerability at the same time and thats truly a rarity. I wish her nothing but the best and hope for a follow-up one day 🥰
I hope she gets the yearning for motherly nurture
I wish I had a friend like her. Open, honest, articulate, and totally authentic. She really owns her choices, and she seems so incredibly kind.
But, as a friend she needs to be well. Hopefully she will get well and be an even better friend
Dang, give up ur kid just to be a 304? And blame her life choices on knowing that's what men want? She got some issues she needs to take care of.
304?
@@LwandileDL I think its hoe but like on a calculator when you flip it upside down as a kid lol
@@LwandileDL it means a prostitute it came from if you flip a calculator upside down it will spell "HOE" it's like a slang term.
IMO Nikki is so very very desperate to be loved! She’s addicted to attention and seems completely empty emotionally. She reminds me a little bit of how I was when I was younger. I’m also an ex speed addict, ADHD, an ex erotic dancer, and a SA surviver. She seems like she’s running away from her very own world of pain. She looks like she’s still taking meth regularly and I’m heartbroken thinking about the crash that’s going to hit her soon. Her mask is slipping, just as it does for everyone, and I feel like crying thinking about the massive wall of regret and anguish that’s coming. The people that have used and abused her, especially when she was a child, should spend their lives in gaol. I wish that I was Nikkis mother and that I could give her some of the love that she needs. ❤️
What u said is true. The mask is off, I'm depressed as hell. Was using cause of past childhood traumas. Dealing with the reality now. I'm depressed and very suicidal. I messed up my youth. I could have had a better life. I wish I didn't cheat on my husband. It was fun and games until I fell inlove @36 years old. And he dumped me, I found God and dealing with all the traumas. OmG I'm dying
@@ginalion9858 keep remembering that the suicidal thoughts after coming off using are part of your brain resetting itself. This too shall pass. You do have a purpose here even if you can’t see it right now. One day, one hour, one minute at a time. Sending love ♥️
My condolences to everything you ladies had to go through. My hearts breaks for each of you. Thank you for sharing and posting. While reading your informative comments, I can see all your wisdom, support & empathy for fellow survivors. Sending you ladies love , prayers and hugs. 🤍🙏🏽🌼
@S Panther yes! I just commented she may be much more BPD than adhd, it was that same emptiness I also perceived.
What she needs to understand is that she has a shelf life. And at some point soon, if not right now, men will put up with her chaos less and less, and her choices will become less and less desirable. She doesn't seem like the quintessential meth head to me, but it may be because her personality has a little more than a sunshine aspect to it. A good part of it seems to have a real Bimbo aspect to it. If she turns a blind eye to that "Massive wall of regret " she could easily take a path that is very common where people go deeper into the realm of more and more. More drugs, more often, more powerful drugs, deeper and deeper into the weeds of society into more and more toxic and incarceration likely environments. She's sober right now, but admittedly she can't find meth. Who can't find meth? Meth will find her? I think that she seems to have decent intelligence, but the blind eye she has turned to the fact that using sex "work" has afforded her a buffer to the harsher realities of life than she realizes is where the Bimbo in her rears her care free head.
Also, women that use their bodies to make money are prone to the chaos. Even when they have it as good as it gets, they tend to do things that cause them to be shown the door, and they can't figure out why someone is being a jerk to them. I agree she "seeks attention" .... foe all the wrong reasons, in all the wrong places. Her childhood is a huge factor, if not the root. Born of chaos, seeks chaos. Is chaos. And she never mentions her chaos, other than to say, very simply, she cheats. Which the only reason she brings up this one chaotic fault ... is for attention to say, " see what my ****y can do. Good luck.
How is it that some of these ladies say they make all this quick easy money sitting on a bar stool but occasionally become homeless?
They never learned how to be responsible with money.
Crack
....and give tips for this "avenue". There is no need to judge these women, their portraits are chilling enough. ;)
@@helenaneumann1872 😂
Yep….they spend their fistful of dollars as fast as they make them……
Give a man cheap sex, decent food, a monthly salary, and cheap entertainment, and he will throw his ambitions right out the window. The comfort zone is the cemetery of dreams.
“comfort addiction,” occurs any time someone complains about his job or life, yet never makes a change. People who suffer from comfort addiction are addicted to the comfort level they're currently at - even if they claim they don't like their current job or situation.
Very true, but suprisly comfort addiction and the ability to keep it going is the American dream, own a house, have your money make your money.. enough money to do what you want in reason.. thats most peoples goal.. actually attaining it is quite difficult, were you dont have to work and you can still just live a comfortable mediocrity... The people who strive for something more or different, are seen as abnormal... The whole thing with this lifestyle that these people live on this channel is the end result of striving for something different, but it normally ends it a worse case, its very few people who actually accomplish their dreams and desires, people who dont settle for mediocrity wind up becoming drug addicts, or other negetive lifestyles when they eventually fail at what they strive for... Because they wont accept mediocrity.... So they implode and self destruct.. its the fear of the loss of comfort that keeps people from going erratic.. like they say, when you have nothing, you have nothing to lose..
@@scarletfragment99 You really nailed it, dude. Well said.
THIS
The definition of borderline. Mark asked all the right questions. Heartbreaking.
1000%
Yes!! I see myself in her so much. I'm BPD and sex addict
This channel is like keeping it real for real. Nothing is more spellbinding than reality.
All marks guests are just like ppl you n I. They just happen to be interviewed by mark. 😀
One of the best and realest channels ever on UA-cam 🤗
💯.....Mark does the best interviews!! And man, his photography is stellar!
A fine instructional video on what not to do when you have a child.
"OMG he looks like a killer that's what I want"
Uhh wtf!! 😳🤯
Right!?! But hey, it's what she know's & it's more than that... people who experience childhood trauma usually have some deep seeded shit that rears it's ugly head at some point in their life and it comes out in different ways. Even people.who experience trauma may not even understand "why" they are like that until they start doing some work, hard work and start moving away from that old "bad familiarity"
She's chaos in human form. I wish her the best
This was a great interview. Nikki you have such a great personality and so much confidence.
Her justification of not having her daughter, seen as a positive, in retrospect, due to her hanging out with a sex offender / murderer seemed off to me. Not judging - I get what she is trying to say - but it def stood out most to me. I wish her well.
Can we stop saying that we don’t judge because we ALL do it 😂
Nikki, I don't know if you will see this, but I'm in my forties, and my mother committed suicide when I was nine, and my father was often either emotionally abusive or absent. From a man who basically grew up without his parents, please, take some of the money that you might spend on other things, and get some good therapy, and some healing for yourself. Then, get back in touch with your daughter. She needs you.
So the claim is an "empath".... that abandons their own child... because they like sex and likes scumbags with neck tats. So flippant about the child abandonment.
The only respect I have left is for the fact that this person can at least admit they were about to repeat the same pattern as their mother....
Too bad it's at the child's expense either way.
How cute.
I hope everyone has a blessed day and you continue to succeed in life
Back at ya brother. 😎👍
Same to you brethren. Happy Friday everyone!
Thank you 😊 and you as well!
It's so weird that she acts like she had to give up her daughter or put her through a lot of difficulties when in reality she could also choose to just take care of her daughter without exposing her to abuse or whatever she is worried to expose her to.
Yeah right, and get a real job !!! I don't think so.
@@johnnybiggunz1141 my mother never got married or had a man come over to our house after divorcing my father. She was worried about bringing in a stranger to our home since we were 2 girls. Not saying that you should never have a relationship after a divorce, but there are different options
It’s not a square life when you’re missing a parent. Her daughter most likely harbors so much frustration towards her mom and that’s sad. Nothing but excuses from someone who never fully developed.
She's really messed up but I can respect her honesty
Your the only person that can have your back....well spoken...great interview!
Interesting how she thinks that her daughter having a "white picket fence" life, will keep her daughter safe and "away" from this lifestyle choice.
Dear God almighty, thank you for my square life.
I was wondering if Nikki isn't more on the BPD spectrum. She is very sweet.
I was thinking the same thing. She seems to have Borderline Disorder.
Abandoning a child to date murderers and perverts. SMH.
One minute in and i relieved she is there just for the check!
Bags of personality and incredibly articulate. Good luck to her for the future.
Sarcasm. LoL
It's sad because she chose the lifestyle over her child. So much more I could say, but I won't. This is coming from someone that's been thru it too. I've not lived a charmed life, but am grateful for every day. I really hope she gets everything sorted 4 her child's sake.
I just hope the child is happy, with or without her. I think kids prefer stability and structure. If the mom can’t provide that, then the kid is probably better off without her. Hopefully, the dad is doing a better job.
I agree....It's heartbreaking when a parent uses the excuse they gave their kid up to give them a better life,when the truth is they're to selfish to give up there lifestyle to keep there kids !
It's s not sad. She recognized that her husband was the safer choice. This channel is filled with people who were broken because their parents tried to bring them along with them.
@@aesop4024 Exactly! What she did was actually the best possible outcome considering how everyone else on this channel was raised. Thank God for the kid’s dad.
So you guys think the child just stopped needing her at age 5? Imagine if you were the little girl and you were 5 and your mom was like,"Yeah, I'm no no longer good for you. It's me not you. You just don't fit into my lifestyle anymore".The best thing to do would be for her to get into therapy, stop those bad habits because honestly she's better than that. I feel like she deserves better and so does the little girl. Would y'all have the same opinion if it was a man sitting up there saying all that?
Father Time will bring her down to earth. Fast!
It happens to us all. That's why you enjoy your youth.
I’m 35 bro I’m good lol let’s see you have the balls to talk about things that make most people squirm
Love your videos!!
We all have trauma and shame in our lives however I feel too many people use this as an excuse to continue on the path they want to take....example...Im heroic because I did the responsible thing and had my daughter go with her dad. Ask her kid if it was. I deal with this same thing with my son whose daughter would love him to be in her life. The bottom line is these people do not want to take the responsibility to handle their reponsibilities. And we let them get away with it. While dont have the answer to fix this...I for sure see the damage left behind. I grew up in a broken household myself...luckily my parents both stepped up...now was it 50/50 no but my folks just pushed on with their responsibilities. As a middle age person the biggest thing I see is we allow people to excuse responsibilities.
Quit projecting your situation on her and her daughter.
Well said.
I wonder if she's had any therapy. She wants her daughter to be square, yet she doesn't want the same for herself. I've never heard anyone else say they knew they'd do sex work when they were young. It's sad, honestly. "I'm a nurturer." Except for her daughter. Thank God for her ex stepping up.
The unspoken is that she doesn't feel like she deserves the square life.
Heartbreaking how she says she knew from a young age that her career was going to be serving men’s sexual desires in some form. Also how she describes her “love language” as being everything a man wants. Mothers PLEASE show your daughters how to appreciate their true worth🥺❤️
Amen Ashley
Cause she likes men an wants to please them knowing so since a kid so what she's some how wrong for that? So I guess I'm also wrong for wanting to take care an please the women I love knowing I'd want to since a young man or that just doesn't work for men or I wanna serve a women over myself an family don't make men the villain cause she wants to be a sex addict we all make our own choices in life boo hoo
@@taylorhill4362 I’m definitely not shaming her CHOICES. I’m expressing the sadness behind her NOT knowing her WORTH. Meaning I’m sure she has a brain but no one ever taught her that it was worth showing off. Shut up.
@@taylorhill4362 have you learned nothing from this channel? SA is what causes that premature sexualization and reckless nympho behavior.
@@ashleygamboa5649 Lol so she doesn't know her own worth cause she likes sex an pleasing men you just have a baseless opinion that is pretty much shaming her she can be what she wants an doesn't need someone like yourself to say oh well it's sad oh well I feel bad for her cause etc etc like huh she doesn't so why should you ? Know your worth an mental capacity cause to tell someone to simply shut up shows your lack of communication skills Honey you're backhanded disrespectful for feeling sorry for her like somethings so wrong with her TF
"I started adulthood then I quit. I started motherhood, then I quit."
All I Heard in the video was I’m a selfish shitty mom but it’s because I’m a victim so I’m gonna try and justify it to the world and hope that my daughter will see that I’m not such a bad mother
Daughters are not dumb. She thinks she’s fooling the world, but she’s only fooling herself
So true. She’s a dead beat mom and doesn’t look like she cares.
Mark, thanks for your content. A real eye opener into American culture
We don’t claim her.
She is still a young child who is yearning for love and connection. People who are addicted to sex most likely aren’t addicted to the feeling but the glimmer of connection and validation you get for a moment. Niki I hope one day you realize that you ARE worthy of love and you can find that love and connection within yourself.
That's doesn't make any sense if she always chooses to cheat. She doesn't want a nice, loving man.
@@1428monsterdrink What about you?
I agree with you, wholeheartedly. Sex addiction is an inaccurate term to describe what most women (and probably some men) go through. People get confused, because they first get this kind of attention when discovering their sexuality (which does feel good, physically). But it’s your partner’s reaction to your sexual response (or sexual acts) that you chase after again and again. I never went with an unattractive trick to try to have a physical response with him. It was generally physically revolting, or just neutral if they were clean and polite. What felt nice was the praise and his positive response to me. I wouldn’t say I sought out that line of work for that. I was used in it, to make money for an adult. Then had limited skills to make money for myself, having a 6th grade education. Still, it was something I got out of it that was kind of hard to leave, at times. You have a little fan club of regulars, even though a lot of men were hateful and disrespectful and you never wanted to see them again, for any reason. A lot of people don’t get much notice. Offering sex gets you noticed. Usually, in ways you don’t want, but it’s more of a human connection than none, which is a too-common experience. A lot of people feel like if they ceased to exist, no one would notice. It’s alienation, more than anything, to me.
Such a great video! Thanks for sharing. She seems BPD looking for a Narc partner. These interviews are very educational.
Her charisma and communication abilities are great. Her facial expressions are great. She seems to always have a sparkle in her eye. Good luck, Nikki.
Behind the smiles and facial expressions is a deep sadness and pain.
@@jennross6466 Mark Laita did an interview on the UA-cam Channel Koncrete. In the interview he said many of the interviews he can’t use. The individuals just can’t communicate well. These interviewees are traumatized and full of sadness and pain, but they don’t have the gifts of charisma and communication. I have no doubt Nikki has deep sadness and pain from the multiple forms of abuse she has suffered. However, her charisma and ability to communicate allows her to be a spokesperson for all the traumatized, suffering people. People who aren’t charismatic or communicative, but, like all of us, are the walking-wounded of the Earth.
I can relate to self-sabotaging and laughing when talking about trauma. I have to laugh or else I’ll be depressed 24/7
I like her for her honesty, I like that she didn't censor things & instead she was open about her life ...
This is so eye opening for me personally, thank you for keeping it 100! Sh%$ I need to change my thinking.
Whether you agree with her lifestyle or not I’m proud of her for owning her mistakes and having the wisdom to give her daughter to her ex husband. She’s aware she’s a mess and loves her daughter enough to not subject her to that life even if that means she won’t have a relationship with her. That’s admirable and I’m wishing her the best
Agreed! Also hey girl
@@adriennehilll omg hey! 👋🏽 I follow your channel! You have incredible content!
Just because you own your mistakes doesn’t make it right. What is so admirable about being a bad parent when that kid needs a mother?
@@ScottyPippen maybe it’s because of how I was raised but I wish my mother had enough sense to give me and my siblings to a better suited family member from the start. Eventually my uncle did raise us which kept me from ending up like Nikki but we still have the trauma. I’m just saying if you know you’re a bad parent don’t inflict your bad habits on to an innocent child
@@ScottyPippen seriously! Some of society has shifted into thinking because you own your mistakes it absolves from the wrongdoing and makes you a hero. No, you are still a piece of crap. Personally I like Nikki and her story but when you are up there airing your dirty laundry on the internet like that it's almost guaranteed that her daughter will see this at some point in her life which brings a sad reality to the story as well.
These videos make staying up unil 6:00 worth it.
You interview skills really showed Mark
Sending Nikki pure love + healing energy ✨️
Stay strong Nikki.
I'm on the fence on this one. I admire her strength, but her ability/inability to be a parent is a major thing for me. I struggle when she says she has to choose this life because of trauma, but you don't. Its a choice at the end of the day, but you can avoid bringing children into the mix. And as others have said below, her 10 year old daughter will see this and not see a woman who had to do this, but a woman who walked out because her lifestyle with kids is not the one she wanted. She is too selfish in many ways, one would even say narcissistic.
💯
She's so narcissistic that she actually sees herself as the "hero" for dipping out on her little girl. NO, you are not a hero. A hero would've CHANGED their lifestyle to accommodate their child. Period. End of story.
Well narcissists are created from childhood trauma.. funny how she says shes empath tho😄
@@esskayybee642 she is very "nurturing" got me. I always have an open mind, at least I try my hardest to. But you have a 10 year old daughter who will question your "nurturing" ways with everyone in life, Except for her. And on yt to replay and share for all her family and friends for years to come. Selfish as far as I can tell.
@@marisela7825 For once a parent her/his child is better off with someone else more stable
Love her!! Definitely look forward to an update
Never seen someone drink Gatorade through a straw. Fascinating.
I bet you still haven't. 🤪
There is something very inauthentic about her.
I see the comments about her not being there for her daughter but there are also dad’s that leave their kids with the mother and go mess around in the streets as well. She did what she thought was best for her kid’s safety and even though it’s not the best decision,sometimes people are in SURVIVAL MODE. It doesn’t matter whether you’re male or female, spare your kids the heartache and don’t have children if you’re not ready to put their needs before your own or aren’t emotionally mature to be there for them. In this case, she did that to the BEST OF HER ABILITIES AND TRAUMA RESPONSES. I respect Nikki’s honesty. I hope that she works through her trauma and gets therapy. There are too many people on this channel getting interviewed who basically gave up on themselves and say “I’m addicted to (insert here) and that’s WHO I AM”. Their addiction becomes their IDENTITY. It doesn’t have to be that way! ONE CAN CHANGE IF THEY WANT TO!!❤️ Go back to school NiKKi. COMMIT TO YOUR GOALS THE SAME WAY YOU COMMIT TO YOUR BASIC NEEDS. You can do it!! You’re only 33!!
Women carry that child inside them, it's a different bond. Either way, there's no excuse and shame on you for attempting to make one.
An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind so bringing up what the other gender does means nothing wrong is still wrong
Girl power, amiright? She didn't do it for her kid, she did it for herself. Otherwise she would've changed her lifestyle to accommodate her daughter.
🗑 comment
@@sallyann985 If she didn’t care about her kid, she could have dragged her along with the tricks in and out the room, for the check. Or a whole lot worse. If all you can do is get that child to a better environment, praise to anyone who does that. I bet you would say, “At least leave your baby at a hospital or store. Don’t throw him in the dumpster.” But when people in crisis bring a child to a safe place, it’s not good enough, either? Attitudes like yours contribute to infanticide, because people are so ashamed they try to hide the fact that they were ever pregnant. At least this woman was honest, and took some responsibility.
So likable and authentic - Nikki I hope you find a way to channel your intelligence and tenacity to do bigger things, good luck to you.
Weird the timings off from sound and video. Thanks mark good luck girl
I hope you get therapy. Please don't just assume your daughter will understand your lifestyle, chances are she won't. Yeah most people don't understand what abuse can do to a person, but there is people out there who don't cope in maladaptive ways. Please get help, and please go see your daughter. She deserves to have you in her life.
I appreciate her candor. She's all over the place, though. I'm deathly afraid of how my children will view me. Her daughter will definitely watch this at some point. I think she does have a degree of regret in not reaching out to her child that is eating her alive.
Number 18 in line of comments and the video has been posted only, one minute ago. That's the power of SWV!
This girl has so much potential. I hope she does well and finds her way to move forward.
33? Oof. I would have guessed 23, just judging by the way she talked. She really hasn't learned much from that many years of that lifestyle
That's a lot of assuming for someone who literally doesn't know her at all.
@@dommiedarkoh8816 He's obviously all knowing, look at that head!
You're as smart as your environment and I'm in the late late 30s being nice
Time to grow up and get yourself together for yourself and your daughter! She acts like a teenager. My heart breaks for her daughter.
I doubt her daughter will ever thank her for anything.
Keep dropping bangers
I would totally listen to her podcast. What great energy.
Pretty sure her 10 year old daughter will have a few questions after she watches this. It will probably be a devastating experience for her but thats life. Always interesting, thanks!
She really tried to dress up choosing bad, abusive men over her kid as looking out for the girls welfare. The mental gymnastics are quite something.
Hopefully she never sees it
@Jaye Mcdowell 10 year olds love UA-cam. If her daughter doesn't watch this, one of her friends or acquaintances will and they will tell her.
@@thebighousencaaattendancer478 so true.
I think people need to tell their story or how can we fix things?Sorry thing hurt your sensibilities!Maybe you think she should forget about the what made her?There is NOTHING wrong with Nikki that she should hide.
What a sweetheart. Please keep us posted on your podcast! 😊
So much of a sweetheart she abandons her child .
I know it is easy to be an armchair therapist, but trying to find men that replicates her image of her father is pretty textbook. So is finding those men and trying to have a successful relationship, thus finally correcting the wrong she experienced in her childhood. She says that she doesn't know why she's attracted to the chaos, but if that is what is familiar to you than that is what you seek. Even when it's to your own detriment. Fixing the childhood traumas and finally recognizing and reconciling with it is the answer to being free of it.
Nice tones and way of speaking , I can hear her being good at voice acting.
She owns who she is. You said you ex was horrible… so why is your 10 yr old with him???
She has two ex husbands. Says the one that has her daughter has a very stable family situation.
It’s too bad that being some sort of a mother isn’t on that priority list.
This was a great interview! Very engaging person
Loved the interview and loved niki!