I think your channel is awesome. You are such a smart woman, and not only because you have a Ph.D (which is pretty awesome) but because you have such an egalitarian, fair, inclusive understanding of life, it's just fantastic.
I love this. I have always been happy knowing I was different than the "norm". I love reading, learning, crafting and taking care of nature. Most people are not like me and I love that. Being different is so much more fun than being just like everyone else.
I am a geek. I do feel like I am on the outside as well. I have been deemed stuck up, "trying to be white" (I am an African American female geeky individual). I love who I am and I am not going to change for anyone (hence the reason I am divorcing). I have been watching Big Bang Theory since the day it premiered. I remember hearing you were joining the cast and I was like...Yes!!! I loved you on Blossom and I hate that it seems to not be in syndication or streamed on Netflix or anything. I would love to rewatch old episodes and see you and Six hanging out.
Conratulations, thats the most depressing thing I've read all day. How the fudge is striving for the future or at least wishing it to be better 'white' ? We need a good plague to sweep the land of these regressive knuckle draggers. Stay strong, be awesome.
holy crap... what the heck has white got to do with it????? maybe I am speaking out of ignorance but I see all sorts of different color people that consider themselves geek/nerd. Stand tall 80flowergurl! I am right there beside you!
There should be a love button for this!!! I am very proud to be a nerd! I'm a nerd and an introvert. I have always been different. Sometimes my family members will tell me I'm odd but I tell them it's called "different." I embrace my nerdy self and I love my intelligence. As a kid in school I didn't have a lot of friends because they all wanted to hang out with the boys but when they needed help with school work they came to "the brain" or so I was called. I would never change and I wear my nerd badge with pride :)Ohhhhh D&D! I haven't heard anyone speak of that in a long time
This is why I am Nerdfighter. My first first Nerdfighter Gathering was one of the most amazing social events of my life because it was a room full of people that liked all the strange things I did.
So true! When I mentioned nerdfighteria during some of my first weeks of university, someone else jumped up and said: you know nerdfighteria?! She is now one of my best friends :)
I'm glad you're doing this. Also, not all nerds like "strange" things as in D & D or Xmen. Some of us are passionate about social justice and the environment and like decorating and science and religion. And we still don't fit. Others find us nerdy or just too weird. My interest in and using my voice to talk about social justice seems to be off putting to others. I do not get not feeling passionate about social justice, about the quality of life of others, and about the environment. What I am saying is ... I often feel on the outside of geeks and nerds who like D & D or Xmen or Dr. Who. Like there's nowhere to fit for a nerd who doesn't like stuff like that (that is doesn't get the appeal).
Everyone has valid moments of internalized "separateness" or "otherness" from a given population or sub-population. The only group that all humans cannot be isolated in any way from is "being human", but that's about it, heh. Subdivide that population into anything else, from sex, to gender, or religion, to sports team, to preferred sex position, to preferred D&D version, et cetera, and you get the necessary potential for division and a possibility for a sense of "otherness" to reveal itself. Just as I often feel (although my case might be a particular one because I seem to pathologically avoid social interaction as most data collection on human interaction for me has proven to be...difficult for me in myriad ways in the past, so I tend to just assume that most future interactions will reap similarly unrewarding outcomes, heh, I know, sucks to think that way, I'm working on changing up my cognitive schemata) that I am different from humanity-at-large and even within the sub-population of "societal misfits" or "nerds/geeks" or "relatively intelligent people", et cetera, there are also others within those groups that may feel that people like me (whatever that means) may make them feel alone and disconnected from people who are more similar to them. I think it's a matter of perspective. I'd rather feel detached from people in some visceral sense than superior to people and think that, "That group of people are below me" (well, serial killers and the like suck quite a bit as they impose plenty of suffering upon the rest of us, but whether we like it or not, they are human, too, so to judge their behaviors as undesirable is fundamentally different from judging them as a human being to be undesirable, but I'm wading into a possibly contentious area here, so I'll refrain [and no, I'm not religious, but agnostic]). Ultimately, there is a place for you even to fit in, even if it seems hard to find such a place. Having that conclusion is only a function of your past data collection given the individuals and groups you've interacted with in the past. No one is fundamentally an island unto themselves in the purest sense, or at least I don't think such a human has existed yet...(okay, okay, perhaps the first of our distant ancestors whom had an abstract, conscious thought that was a level of complexity never before had up to that time...but I'm really grasping for stuff here, heh). If none of what I said made any sense, it's okay, I'm used to it. Peace.
Hi Mayim, As a 71 year old wife, mother and grandmother I feel that we are all unique in one way or another. Btw, I have been a fan of yours since Beaches and my daughters never missed an episode of yours on Blossom. I also love the BBT.
I don't think geeks hold the monopoly on feeling left out. The older I get, the more I realize that _everyone_ feels disenfranchised or left behind in some way by society.
we don' hold the monopoly, but i certainly hope we don't make others feel left out the way they do us! i don't remember anyone else in my class having P.E. clothes pissed on and flushed in the toilet. I don't remember anyone else at work getting laid off this last year except for the three geeks in the department that still goes and see star wars or x-men, and talks about it.
You make me feel so much better about myself. I know being nerdy and interested in things most people find to academic instead of pop culture is not a bad thing but I still feel left out a lot of the time. You truly are inspiring and I find you so relatable and endearing. So I guess I just want to say thank you for being who you are and not being ashamed and still strong enough to show your emotional perspectives.
I'm not a "geek" or a "nerd" either. In fact all of the geeks and nerds that I know, including my own son, just call me a "total technophobe", because I'm so inept with modern technology. However, everything Mayim said fits perfectly with me being a huge introvert. I don't do small talk, don't get the point of idle chit-chat, often have people think that when I make a joke based of absurdist humor, I'm actually being serious and probably worst of all, I have no real interest in sport, reality TV or soap operas. I know, I'm doomed to a life of loneliness and isolation and I wouldn't have a friend in the world if it wasn't for all those voices in my head. ( Umm..for those of you who love small talk etc. that was a little bit of humor and probably wasn't the least bit absurdist. You'll have to work it out for yourselves though because I can only tell you as much as the voices allow me to. )
This is fantastic. I always forget how much of an outsider my "nerd" personality is until I try to talk about the latest Doctor Who Christmas Special at work, or how I noticed something new in my 10th marathon of Firefly and I just get crickets...
I'm so glad you talked about this. I feel silly sometimes being 50 and drinking out of a Deadpool mug at work. But still I do it every day. I just need to remember that it's okay to be different. And shout out to 3.5. \m/
I watched your "Too Emotional" video and it made me feel so good to hear from somebody who also experiences hypersensitivity that I had to watch this one too. Thank you so much sharing with us. It's so nice to hear a public voice speaking about things that I deal with myself. You're wonderful for it and you've gained a new subscriber. :)
Although I have certainly seen you on The Big Bang I was not aware of your channel until 2 days ago..you are so interesting. I knew you were intelligent but you have such empathy for the world and you put into words what a lot of us feel but aren't good at expressing. And just a word from a non geek...sometimes geeks can also be intimidating..we feel stupid around them. But we do have common ground and that is what is worth exploring. You are a light in a sometimes dark world. Keep shining.
I think the reason "geeks" and "nerds" sometimes feel left out is because they often don't think to rely on each other and value their own social circles. That's because the presumption is always to want to be with the "cool" crowd. But the highly intellectual crowd has so much to offer. As a side note, I just have to say to Mayim that you have done an awesome job portraying Amy Farrah Fowler. The Herb Garden Germination is my all-time favorite but there are so many others where you shine all the way up to last year's episodes.
You are so right...3.5 is the best. It's difficult when no one gets my jokes and what I mention is met with blank looks or to have nothing but blank looks at what others are talking about. Thank you for bringing this up.
Thank you Mayim, this video came right on this day. I am also one of the people who often stand "outside", Not understanding what the people around me are talking about. It is good to know that there are quite a lot of people with these experiences all over the world. I love the development of Amy in her relationship to Sheldon, it is so sensitively told and acted by you and Jim. Thank you Mayim for all the inspiration 👍❤️
"We're born alone, we live alone, we die alone. Only through our love and friendship can we create the illusion for the moment that we're not alone." - Orson Wells
I'm so happy I stumbled on this video. I'm in therapy right now, its new for me, and the first thing I asked my therapist was "I feel like I'm always on the other side of the glass, never truly belonging anywhere, in any situation, or with anyone. Always unsure and constantly aware of how I don't belong" were working through it but you have no idea how good it feels to hear that I'm not alone in this feeling. Thanks so much, I needed to hear this today.
Thanks so much for sharing this. I especially appreciate it for my daughters who have inherited and embraced their mom and dad's geekiness and need to hear other voices than are own about life as a geek. P.S. 1st Ed AD&D and 5th Ed D&D are the best.
I absolutely love how you spoke about how even if culture represents the idea of being different, actually doing so is challenging. I have deep respect for all the people who do on a daily basis.
I used to think that I was "different" and a "nerd", but now I think that I am totally normal and other people are brainwashed into being some sort of zombies. I am not trying to be disrespectful, many of the zombie people are my family, but honestly when you are being concerned what Kardashian is wearing (or not), rather than trying to work out how to supply solar energy to the third world or solve the world garbage crisis, than there is something seriously wrong with you. The planet is in strife and our very existence is under threat and I am supposed to worry what shade of lipstick is in "fashion"? Pleaaaaaaseeee. Give me a break!
No reason you can't do both. Why not discover new ways to how to clean the earth, power energy sources, get clean water to backward countries while wearing that cute new shade of lipstick that Kim K recommended. Why do you have to be one or the other. Is it possible to be both?
Mayim, I thank you from the bottom of my heart for being who you are! I never fit and I now have my daughter who for sure does NOT fit in and yes it TOTALLY HURTS for me to see and for her to live with! Thank you soooo much for sharing these moments with us! You need your own talk show! Love you lots!
You just described the way I feel so much of the time! Just replace the subjects that interest you with mine- and the feeling of being left out even when you're trying is still the exact same! I am challenged with this a lot- some days are easy because I don't care and I can just enjoy myself as I am, and other days it becomes painful and exhausting because I feel like no matter what I do, I will never be THAT, or good enough that people will just see me as cool and interesting and beautiful the way that I am. I am not alone- you are not alone- this makes it easier to tackle- thank you!
Don't know. I don't feel like a geek and FOR SURE I'm not part of the cool guys ... but I feel left out anyway. I don't care about a lot of the things the "everybody" seems to care about, but I don't really have an intelligent and/or amazing hobby/job/talent. So I wouldn't fit within the geek comunity nor the cool people ... I have to say though that I'm not a mediocre dull person either ... what am I??? A new species??? I think I just made a discovery here!!! XD anyway, this videos are very, VERY interesting!
If you don't feel like you can be part of a certain community, don't force yourself. We are all different, so don't try to put a label on who you are to be part of a certain group. Enjoy what you love to do
You don't have to be a genius at something to be geeky. I love superheros & sci-fi but are not academically blessed in anyway. My best talent is being slightly above average at art. I do however like talking to others who have the same interests & appreciation for things as me, most of those people describe themselves as being geeky, so I tend to veer towards them. Like anyone I am a unique individual (an oxymoron i know) but I have found that a lot of self confessed geeks are generally less judgmental & don't try & make you feel bad for liking what you like, whether that be a passion for Star Trek or horses.
I’m just now discovering your you tube channel. I am showing this to my 10 year old. We’ve had many conversations lately about how “different” she feels from the rest of her friend , no matter how much she tries to fit into their world. She’s very tall,beautiful, intelligent and interested in computers, reading, music and art. That doesn’t always fit the societal mold, but I have assured her many times that’s what makes her so interesting and fun.
There's no such thing as "normal" only people who live closer to the top of the bell curve. People who call themselves "normal" live there and those of us they call "abnormal" simply live further from the top/middle of the bell curve.
My brother and I have always been geeky, introverted and anxious. A couple of years ago we started going to video game conventions regularly and it really helped us to realise just how many people out there we have lots in common with. Embracing your differences is not only empowering, but as it turned out for both of us, very comforting too when you finally find a place where you "belong" without having to pretend you are something you're not.
Thank you so so much for this video and what you are doing. I had a very similar conversation a few nights ago with my daughter about this. She asked if things changed and got easier as I got older. I told her no, I just learned that I am happier being myself and the people that like Magic:The Gathering, AD&D, and my other hobbies tend to be better friends than the ones who don't. It's hard to explain to a 12 year old that eventually (probably in college) she will finally meet people with similar interests and hobbies. She hates being in accelerated honors because she feels like it makes her even more of an outsider than she was originally. I couldn't tell her that it get's easier, because it really doesn't-you just learn not to care about people not understanding you or making fun of you. That sounds awful, doesn't it? I hope I'm wrong and my personal experience isn't what her future holds. Hearing or reading other nerds' thoughts and experiences will be very welcome. Thank you again for doing this and I look forward to your videos!
I've always loved being a dork, macho, crazy, loner. I want to be left out. I hate fashion. I don't respect main stream anything. At 57 I'm still an odd duck, and just don't care what "cool" people thing, say, do, don't do.
I just fall in love with this woman every time she opens her mouth. You're a big inspiration for me and I just can't believe how insightful and brilliant you are. God bless you always!
I checked out your other videos, and have to admit that this one is the one that felt like I should respond. I was born on the outside, geek to the raw DNA, and found out that not only do I have Asperger's, but I'm epileptic, so much so that it's impossible for me to drive, hold down a job, or watch some anime without falling on the rug and shaking like a bad VHS transfer. I'm permanently on the outside. So, I've been walking through this human society for 54 years, but never been a part of it. I talk to humans, but I don't grok them at all, let alone in fullness. My humor is dark, weird, and bizarre ( Michael O'Donoghue, Hunter S. Thompson, Arthur Byron Cover, Spider Robinson, and H. P. Lovecraft are my favorite funny authors. ), and sometimes, I scare people. So, yeah, I'm a weird geek. If I was writing for TBBT, it would be far weirder than it is, and the audience would be scared to laugh at it. It does hurt to be different, but it's been hurting for so long, I don't remember it not hurting. I guess I'm used to it. ( Oh , and you're right. 3.5 is the best. )
I'm so glad that you're "different". It makes you incredibly relatable and "real", in a very fake and surface world. That you'd rather come here barefaced and beautiful is so refreshing when most of us layer on the concealer to fake our way through it. You are so inspiring.
Yes finally someone who is talking the truth !!! I feel very much the same way , I felt like I never really fit in , I'm a girly girl who likes fashion and makeup but I also like watching Sci-Fi and reading Fantasy fiction , I could watch Pride & Prejudice followed up by a season of Game of Thrones , I relate better to boys than other girls cause I hate the bitchiness of girl groups , I'm a loner who loves animals and I'm a home bird yet I love to travel , I'm not afraid of blood or gore or anyone needing medical help yet I can't stand cockroaches ( spiders are okay though ;) ) I like fishing , history , vampires , cooking and classical music but I will throw on Pearl Jam every now and then to relive my youth ! I'm lucky I found a best friend and we've been married 17 years and have a boy and a girl , yes they are both geeks like me ;) but that gives us a special bond . I like being a geek , I like being the square peg ,I don't want to be another sheep , I want to enjoy my life and everything in it and not feel like I have to change to suit someone else so they feel more comfortable with themselves . Hope this channel does well for you Mayim , it's a breath of fresh air here on YT and I'll keep following you to see where the adventure goes next ;) Greetings from Ireland xoxo
its great to hear someone who is smart as her still feels anxiety about not fitting in . it can happen to anyone people need to let people be themselves and judge less and not act like they are better than everyone else.
The feeling of being different doesn't change over the years, the awkwardness of it. You just learn ways of dealing with it in more healthy ways and stop fighting and hurting yourself. It's still a terrible experience, but i've found it's less dramatic as decades go by. If you find yourself in an environment that's hostile to anyone that doesn't "fit in", get out if you can, find a safer and healthier environment. There's always a place to be who you are out there. Thanks Mayim for touching this topic and the wise and kind words.
TBH, though I have always been a misfit (facial disfigurement as a child set me on that path), I have never, ever, wanted to be 'one of the cool kids' or even had any remote interest in what those kids liked. I lived in my imagination while they were aping their older brothers and sisters. I liked different music and fashion. I loved to read and to learn. And being bullied mercilessly throughout school made me want to be less like the 'cool kids' not more. I found my 'tribe' in my late teens, and have been a happy alternative person ever since. It's not about fitting in. It's about finding the people who are *just like you*, who are on the same level as you. Whose jokes you get, whose culture you understand. I'd much rather spend an evening in the pub chatting about Farscape or Big Bang (I frelling LOVE your show!!) than gossiping about some celebrity or other.
Just saw this video. Thank you for getting right to the heart of what it means to be a geek/nerd. I grew up being different like many others, and luckily I learned to adapt. My experiences in life led me to start a Facebook group called Talkin Nerdy for nerds of ALL types. At just under 1000 members (from all sorts of places), we've worked hard to create a safe haven for those who want to express their interests without being harassed or judged. Your video has spoken directly to the heart of our mission and philosophy. So, on behalf of nerds everywhere (or at least 1000 of us lol) I give you a heartfelt thanks. The Nerd Community supports you!!!
Mayim, if you have some spare time, it would make more then a day for me if you read this: I just realized, you might just be the geakiest one on the entire show in real life. You are a scientist, you are a nerd/geek, you do youtube, you don't seem fake like most celebrities... AND you believe in science AND god. I want to write this to you, because you just became my favorite celebrity and probably the first role-model I ever had. Many little kids, growing teenagers and even adults have a role model, but I could never say "that person is someone I look up to". I never took a super hero as someone I look up to, because I think it's just very unrealistic and I could never identify with singers, actors, or any celebrity I've known so far. The closest was probably Neil deGrasse Tyson, but then again, he does not believe in god, which is a huge point for me. But you Mayim, are a person, who I look up to. I am currently studying computer science and plan to even want major in it as a doctor. I am only at the beginning, but I have the ambition to work for it. You really do inspire me and with that, you are the first person in my life to do that in now almost 20 years. I just want to thank you for talking to us, your fans. I want to thank you, for talking about topics, that are sometimes very controversial. I want to thank you, for giving me a role model. You inspire me, and with all of my heart, I really do mean that. I love science, and I do believe in god and that this can go hand-in-hand. I am sorry if you have some trouble reading this, for I am not a native-speaker. I hope you understand, what I wanted to tell you and what you have done for me. Continue to do those videos, they are very good. I hope you are doing well, and if you read this: Please continue your day with the thought, that you just made a persons life alot more meaningful and happier and that you gave someone a person to look up to. A very good person to look up to. Have a wonderful day :)
SirVampyr you made my day for writing about Mayim being your role model. I am a 62 yr. old woman all alone, with adult children on their own, & whom I am proud of. I have worked at so many occupations that my resume is way too long, & am currently going through an enormous number of changes, physically, mentally, socially & financially. I too have personally been struggling to find someone to be a role model & to emulate. Mayim Bialik has just filled that void for me. For many years I admired her talents as a scientist, as well as an actor. I just discovered Mayim's vlog (& your comment) & she added more to the admirable qualities I respect Mayim for: she's a Geek-Mom; able to balance a myriad of life's good & bad, work & play, & being different turning into joyously embracing one's uniqueness; she is proud of her Jewish heritage, culture, & religion - like you said above, "... AND you believe in science AND g-d. ..."; & I admire & respect so much more. I have never subscribed to anyone's online presence, but I did subscribe to hers. I can't get enough of her world view, personal view & religious pride! This was meant to be, (or as my mother would say in Yiddish, "beshert",) as I discovered her vlog while searching for an online connection to learn more about my observance of Rosh Hashanah & Yom Kippur, the Jewish New Year & Day of Atonement.
SirVampyr Dear Sir-lol. Of one thing I am sure: God loves you & there is nothing you can do about it. Since I believe we are all one, this 66yr Catholic Nana feels free to say & mean this: I love you. Go with God.
You described exactly how I feel. I've grown up being obsessed with reading and writing. I love learning, and I hate missing college classes. I wear glasses, don't dress very fashionable. (mostly t-shirts, jeans, and converse.) I love Doctor Who, Sherlock, Star Wars, Marvel/DC, Tolkien. I've always been different from others, and never really able to talk to people my age because we simply have nothing in common. But suddenly it's cool to be nerdy, and wear converse and glasses, and not be very sociable. I'm not saying that wrong exactly, it's just kind of annoying that people are turning the way I've always been into a lifestyle that wasn't desirable until now.
My sons glasses are thick as Coke bottles, he has hearing aids, he's six and he is very different and I wonder if kids tease him because of his differences. He came home and cried for two hours yesterday. We try to talk to him but he has a hard time expressing what he is thinking and sometimes feeling. My wife and I are as different as you are, and we accept who we are and I hope my son will see that and like who he is!
That is so sad if 6 years olds are already bullying a kid based on being a bit different. I hope you find a way to get him to open up to you, maybe try getting him draw or something if he finds it hard to vocalize? If he is that upset there is obviously something wrong & you might be able to talk to the teachers/school & help him suffer a little less. The world can be a hard for those who are different but we all have some power to help stop bullying & make everyone feel included.
cw2lido I understand. I, too, wear thick glasses and hearing aids. And, now, also an FM Loop (for hard of hearing people to have sound into their hearing aids to hear better). And I have Asperger's. And, I code websites and love X-Men and Star Trek. Yep, I understand about loneliness. It bites that this is what your son is going through. Please show him MY response to you, here, plus Mayam Bialik's video to assure him of that he is not alone in what he is gong through cus others are going through it, too. Then, also maybe get him friends that are similar so he doesn't have to be so alone.
He will grow up to be independent and comfortable with who he is if he has you guys for role models. Keep him occupied in hobbies or activities he loves. I have a cousin who is picked on for her weight and goes through the same thing but its gotten easier for her because she knows where to find her happiness now, in soccer and singing.
Finally! Someone who speaks my language and "gets" me. It is very difficult to have viewpoints and interests different from everyone around you. I am 63 and have lived this way since I was a child. Stumbling upon your channel was the best Christmas gift I could get. Thanks for sharing the real Mayim with us!
I'm non-stop thinking about consciousness, mindfulness and being human - but I'm also sarcastic, not "new-agey" - more down-to-earth with my philosophy. It's very hard to find people to relate to. I subscribed immediately. Cheers to all of us square pegs.
Thankyou so much for this. I sit at work and feel very left out when everyone is talking about how 'on fleek' something is and they tease me for not knowing the newest slang or celebrity. This video has made me feel really positive that other people are in my shoes.
Thank you for posting this, I've never related to a video so much. I've spent most of my life trying to being normal and fit in to realize I was just being fake to myself. It wasn't until my 20's I truly accepted who I really was. It's still hard but I do feel more comfortable being who I am.
It's always so good to hear other people discuss these feelings. I have been the outsider as long as I can remember. I don't fit in with my family, I never have, and now that I am grown and married I don't fit in with my husbands family. It hits me like a dagger in the gut to sit at one of his family dinners, seeing how well his sister-in-laws fit in. They all love sports, horror books and fancy restaurants. They look at me like im crazy when I start going in-depth about star wars or fantasy novels. My husbands newest in-law constantly says how geeky she is and what a dork she is, but she fits in with his family like a glove, even thought she has known them 3 years less than I have, she fits in 100x better. She plays sports with them, she's loud, she joins in every conversation. Meanwhile I sit there quietly, hoping the topic will change from basketball/football to video games, books or art. The worst part is its literally impossible to explain this feeling to people that do fit in. I love my husband, but he will never understand how I feel. He always tells me "they love you, of course you fit in!" but I know I don't, and never will. Its hard, but im trying to learn to just love myself, and be okay with not fitting in.
Wow ***** Where did that rant come from? Adonis Amarante said he agreed with Mayim 100% and I was making a joke about her saying D&D 5th was the best. Soooooooooo, where is the problem? Are we going with "Deep seated emotional issues" or "Internet troll looking for a fight"?
***** 1) HOW CAN YOU SAY YOU HAVE A BROADER SPECTRUM AND MORE EXPERIENCE IF YOU HAVEN'T PLAYED D&D?!?!?! Seriously, you have to play it. (And 2nd Edition rocks!) en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dungeons_%26_Dragons
Thank you Mayim! I have a son who is pretty much Sheldon. Before Big Bang I kept getting advised to "have him tested" or " get him help" I knew he did not fit the main stream mould but he is an abundance of goodness. Now though he is accepted as another facet of the human experience with something to offer thanks to the work you and the cast do.
Why do you need a female geek? My husband is a geek & I'm totally not! We get along perfectly. Surely! Him being a geek gives me the extra time that I spend involved with my special-needs niece & nephew. I love entertaining, and we do it together, I feed everyone & have conversations & he has collected all the geeks & they are talking about this 'n that 'n the other in his den. However, we had to agree on a bunch of other things, like, recycling, paying taxes, our way of spending money, we have a strong religious & community conscience that unites us in our off times. Every Wednesday we Volunteer to go pick-up food for the Church Pantry. Every Thursday we pass out food to the hungry. That is four hours & four hours that we have spent enjoying what we do & each other... Differences do not have to be a bad thing. We met on a Plane trip arriving to Orlando, FL. We both lived here...enough in common to start a conversation... Just follow the lead of the talkative one & everything else, will fall into place.... Promise...
i think everyone is special in thier own way. my mom met the love of her life at 47. theres hope, i promise you. do not change who you are for anyone. you should be loved for just being you
I met my boyfriend, now 45, 5 years ago. He's totally a computer geek, and so am I. Now we live together and play PC games together. There is hope for everyone, don't give up ;)
Hi Mayim. I'm Chad. I just found your channel and I love it. As a kid I loved your show and it was if you were telling me that it was ok to be different. As adults you are still saying the same thing and I thank you for it. I'll be 41 in February and at times I still need to be reminded of this. Thank you for always being you even when it has been difficult. You inspire me.
I love you so much! Such an inspiration!! I am 20 and I am an old soul. I don't fit in and even though loneliness hits once in a while I have to admit that I am half happy that I stay alone most of the time :) There is a certain comfort in your own company and sometimes this comfort turns loneliness into solitude ❤️
Just found your channel. It's great. I can't believe Big Bang started 10 years ago. A friend of mine got me into it . He said to me "This is you". A few years later he passed away. Every time I watch BB, I think of him. Thank you for the joy. X
It's been a few years since i've settled with the idea that Mayim is talking about.. Being different, not understanding some conversations, people😃. I have embrased it, im proud, and, when you do so, life is so much better, you find the right people around you. It's not just nerdiness, it's life in general.. But thanks for sharing..
Just found this. Thank you. Being different is hard. Being "different" and adding other life's happenings while you are young is even harder. And in my later 40s, I am learning more about me and learning to be okay with me.
Your honesty is highly commendable. I'm not a nerd, however I can't get into the same things you commented on simply because I consider them shallow. Keep in mind, as well, that your intelligence is a gift that is appealing regardless. So being a nerd is still better than being dumb and/or ugly. Society do lay some heavy rules on us...
This really hit home... I have always been left out of groups at school... and I think one reason is because I am not interested in what they like. You are amazing! Your are one of my inspirations! Thank you!
omg yessssssss!!!!!!! I needed this so badly today! I am a nerdy/ somewhat awkward outdoorsy gothicish woman working as a hairstylist, unfortunately my business attracts a type of woman that I don't usually fit in with. I try to relate but what you just said made me feel ok about it. thank you!
I am no geek or nerd, nor do I suffer from anxiety but I like to be different from different and accept that society or people around me do not understand how I approach things the way I do. I am a creative person with a different approach to many things and yet I do understand the last couple of videos that I watched since I have encountered your channel by accident. I believe you give hope and motivation to many out there and that is a good thing to do, you ease the worries of people and make them understand no matter who you are we all are beings with flaws that we ne need to understand and live with it becuase we're not alone.... Thank you for the great content, I now will follow this channel.
I dont consider myself as a geek person, but i do feel left out pretty much all the time, i dont drink alcohol and get wasted, i dont do drugs, seems like i dont do anything that is considered fun. Its nice to hear im not the only one, cause its true it hurts a lot...thanks mayim! Youre awesome!!!!
OMG, you get me and you are like the only person who understands this feeling! i always feel left out and I'm always into "geeky things" but i never see anyone as passionate as me about these things and it makes me feel extremely left out. btw, i freaking love the big bang theory and you have really amazing acting skills! You literally made my day :)
Someone signed my high school yearbook with this: "Some people think you're corny and weird, but I think you're OK!" I struggled with that for a while. Now, with TBBT showing this to be actually COOL, I've started to finally embrace the things that make me different - things I'd hidden for so long.
Mayim you’re such a great person. I absolutely love your videos. You always make me smile. Your videos make me feel way better about myself. I’m a 17 year old socially awkward, introverted and pretty nerdy transguy. So yeah fitting in was never something I did. And not being accepted for being part of the LGBT community by the people that surround you doesn’t make life easier. But there’s one thing that has helped me through tough times for years now and that is the Big Bang Theory. I just wanted to say thank you🙃
mayim, I so understand you. ok, I am not strictly a geek but I always feel very different to others and feel like I can't relate to many people. however, I still manage to have an inner confidence in myself and I'm glad that you embrace that
I'm a nerd, and I think this Geek Chic thing is a fake movement. The people in the movement aren't geeks or nerds, they pretend to be. That's what makes it "inaccessible" to real geeks. These wannabee Geeks don't really want to learn about Geekdom, they just flaunt some superficial elements to show how "alternative" they are. These wannabees think that Geekdom is about cosplaying, visiting a comic con and collecting a few souvenirs like bobbleheads or t-shirts, but being a true geek or nerd is much more than that, it is about learning and understanding the lore or the think you geek in, whether it is Dungeons and Dragons, Warhammer 40K, Comic Book universes, Star Wars mythos, etc and being able to have discussion around it.
everyone of your videos make me feel better about being me im different to and i completely understand how it feels to want to be apart of a conversation but you can't that's me all the way you are amazing from the inside out thank you for making me feel less alone
Loved how simple you put the examples of what was geek in the past and how now it is becoming the norm. We have always been different one from another but it was not as accepted as today. Loooovee Big Bang Theory on how this is presented so you start to understand people around you! I have a geek 16 yrs old son and I'm proud of him and his geeky friends!!!❤❤
Yes Mayim!!! I really relate to your viewpoint. From a teenager's perspective I often feel like the main topics of conversation that people are interested in are shallow or superficial and may involve talking down other people. I would much rather 'banter' about the deeper and more intellectual issues. It would be great if you could expand on about how you avoid gossip and speaking negatively about other people
I love that Mayim makes videos my 14 yr old daughter can not only watch....but that I encourage her to do so!!! thanks so much sweet lady.
I think your channel is awesome. You are such a smart woman, and not only because you have a Ph.D (which is pretty awesome) but because you have such an egalitarian, fair, inclusive understanding of life, it's just fantastic.
I love this. I have always been happy knowing I was different than the "norm". I love reading, learning, crafting and taking care of nature. Most people are not like me and I love that. Being different is so much more fun than being just like everyone else.
in awe of being happy being different from the norm!!!! consistently working on this .... ❤❤❤
Thank you for expressing my lifelong feelings. I am 68. Yes different stays forever! I like my quirkyness. 😁
I am a geek. I do feel like I am on the outside as well. I have been deemed stuck up, "trying to be white" (I am an African American female geeky individual). I love who I am and I am not going to change for anyone (hence the reason I am divorcing).
I have been watching Big Bang Theory since the day it premiered. I remember hearing you were joining the cast and I was like...Yes!!! I loved you on Blossom and I hate that it seems to not be in syndication or streamed on Netflix or anything. I would love to rewatch old episodes and see you and Six hanging out.
As I nerdy, black female I can really identify with the "you're trying to be white" struggle.
I'm nerdish and I got the "you're trying to be white" comments, too. But I've learned that what doesn't break us will only make us stronger.
Conratulations, thats the most depressing thing I've read all day. How the fudge is striving for the future or at least wishing it to be better 'white' ?
We need a good plague to sweep the land of these regressive knuckle draggers.
Stay strong, be awesome.
holy crap... what the heck has white got to do with it????? maybe I am speaking out of ignorance but I see all sorts of different color people that consider themselves geek/nerd. Stand tall 80flowergurl! I am right there beside you!
Don't try to be white, Melodie. Trust me, you don't want the wrinkles or the sun burn. We're just jealous of your rhythm and soul.
There should be a love button for this!!! I am very proud to be a nerd! I'm a nerd and an introvert. I have always been different. Sometimes my family members will tell me I'm odd but I tell them it's called "different." I embrace my nerdy self and I love my intelligence. As a kid in school I didn't have a lot of friends because they all wanted to hang out with the boys but when they needed help with school work they came to "the brain" or so I was called. I would never change and I wear my nerd badge with pride :)Ohhhhh D&D! I haven't heard anyone speak of that in a long time
This is why I am Nerdfighter. My first first Nerdfighter Gathering was one of the most amazing social events of my life because it was a room full of people that liked all the strange things I did.
I'm a Nerdfighter as well but sadly i don't live in America or any place where there is any gathering. :(
Lilly That's why I'm lucky there are plenty of gatherings in London
So true! When I mentioned nerdfighteria during some of my first weeks of university, someone else jumped up and said: you know nerdfighteria?!
She is now one of my best friends :)
I'm glad you're doing this. Also, not all nerds like "strange" things as in D & D or Xmen. Some of us are passionate about social justice and the environment and like decorating and science and religion. And we still don't fit. Others find us nerdy or just too weird. My interest in and using my voice to talk about social justice seems to be off putting to others. I do not get not feeling passionate about social justice, about the quality of life of others, and about the environment.
What I am saying is ... I often feel on the outside of geeks and nerds who like D & D or Xmen or Dr. Who. Like there's nowhere to fit for a nerd who doesn't like stuff like that (that is doesn't get the appeal).
Everyone has valid moments of internalized "separateness" or "otherness" from a given population or sub-population. The only group that all humans cannot be isolated in any way from is "being human", but that's about it, heh. Subdivide that population into anything else, from sex, to gender, or religion, to sports team, to preferred sex position, to preferred D&D version, et cetera, and you get the necessary potential for division and a possibility for a sense of "otherness" to reveal itself.
Just as I often feel (although my case might be a particular one because I seem to pathologically avoid social interaction as most data collection on human interaction for me has proven to be...difficult for me in myriad ways in the past, so I tend to just assume that most future interactions will reap similarly unrewarding outcomes, heh, I know, sucks to think that way, I'm working on changing up my cognitive schemata) that I am different from humanity-at-large and even within the sub-population of "societal misfits" or "nerds/geeks" or "relatively intelligent people", et cetera, there are also others within those groups that may feel that people like me (whatever that means) may make them feel alone and disconnected from people who are more similar to them. I think it's a matter of perspective. I'd rather feel detached from people in some visceral sense than superior to people and think that, "That group of people are below me" (well, serial killers and the like suck quite a bit as they impose plenty of suffering upon the rest of us, but whether we like it or not, they are human, too, so to judge their behaviors as undesirable is fundamentally different from judging them as a human being to be undesirable, but I'm wading into a possibly contentious area here, so I'll refrain [and no, I'm not religious, but agnostic]).
Ultimately, there is a place for you even to fit in, even if it seems hard to find such a place. Having that conclusion is only a function of your past data collection given the individuals and groups you've interacted with in the past. No one is fundamentally an island unto themselves in the purest sense, or at least I don't think such a human has existed yet...(okay, okay, perhaps the first of our distant ancestors whom had an abstract, conscious thought that was a level of complexity never before had up to that time...but I'm really grasping for stuff here, heh).
If none of what I said made any sense, it's okay, I'm used to it. Peace.
Hi Mayim, As a 71 year old wife, mother and grandmother I feel that we are all unique in one way or another. Btw, I have been a fan of yours since Beaches and my daughters never missed an episode of yours on Blossom. I also love the BBT.
I don't think geeks hold the monopoly on feeling left out. The older I get, the more I realize that _everyone_ feels disenfranchised or left behind in some way by society.
Agreed!
Well said!
we don' hold the monopoly, but i certainly hope we don't make others feel left out the way they do us! i don't remember anyone else in my class having P.E. clothes pissed on and flushed in the toilet. I don't remember anyone else at work getting laid off this last year except for the three geeks in the department that still goes and see star wars or x-men, and talks about it.
I love you! You articulate my experience!
Let geeks have a moment maybe?
You make me feel so much better about myself. I know being nerdy and interested in things most people find to academic instead of pop culture is not a bad thing but I still feel left out a lot of the time. You truly are inspiring and I find you so relatable and endearing. So I guess I just want to say thank you for being who you are and not being ashamed and still strong enough to show your emotional perspectives.
I feel you.. Everything around me seems too shallow.
I'm not a "nerd" or a "geek" and I still feel like what you have described here...crazy, no? ;) Thank you, Mayim!
I was literally about to leave the same comment! Thank you Janis (:
Janis Lynn I was just going to say the same :)
I'm not a "geek" or a "nerd" either. In fact all of the geeks and nerds that I know, including my own son, just call me a "total technophobe", because I'm so inept with modern technology. However, everything Mayim said fits perfectly with me being a huge introvert. I don't do small talk, don't get the point of idle chit-chat, often have people think that when I make a joke based of absurdist humor, I'm actually being serious and probably worst of all, I have no real interest in sport, reality TV or soap operas. I know, I'm doomed to a life of loneliness and isolation and I wouldn't have a friend in the world if it wasn't for all those voices in my head. ( Umm..for those of you who love small talk etc. that was a little bit of humor and probably wasn't the least bit absurdist. You'll have to work it out for yourselves though because I can only tell you as much as the voices allow me to. )
I have voices in my head too. They bicker, create stories, and help me make decisions, etc.
This is fantastic. I always forget how much of an outsider my "nerd" personality is until I try to talk about the latest Doctor Who Christmas Special at work, or how I noticed something new in my 10th marathon of Firefly and I just get crickets...
I'm so glad you talked about this. I feel silly sometimes being 50 and drinking out of a Deadpool mug at work. But still I do it every day. I just need to remember that it's okay to be different. And shout out to 3.5. \m/
Deadpool is amazing! Don't be ashamed!!!
cierrablue I drink my coffee out of a wonder woman mug and I'm 48!!!
:)
Alli Dachndobe Mine is an "Olivia" the pig coffee cup that my husband recently broke the handle off of 😤
Christi Post ohhhh nooooo!!!!!!!
I watched your "Too Emotional" video and it made me feel so good to hear from somebody who also experiences hypersensitivity that I had to watch this one too. Thank you so much sharing with us. It's so nice to hear a public voice speaking about things that I deal with myself. You're wonderful for it and you've gained a new subscriber. :)
Now looking for this named video ;)
Although I have certainly seen you on The Big Bang I was not aware of your channel until 2 days ago..you are so interesting. I knew you were intelligent but you have such empathy for the world and you put into words what a lot of us feel but aren't good at expressing. And just a word from a non geek...sometimes geeks can also be intimidating..we feel stupid around them. But we do have common ground and that is what is worth exploring. You are a light in a sometimes dark world. Keep shining.
And a person that restores my faith in humanity.
I think the reason "geeks" and "nerds" sometimes feel left out is because they often don't think to rely on each other and value their own social circles. That's because the presumption is always to want to be with the "cool" crowd. But the highly intellectual crowd has so much to offer.
As a side note, I just have to say to Mayim that you have done an awesome job portraying Amy Farrah Fowler. The Herb Garden Germination is my all-time favorite but there are so many others where you shine all the way up to last year's episodes.
You are so right...3.5 is the best. It's difficult when no one gets my jokes and what I mention is met with blank looks or to have nothing but blank looks at what others are talking about. Thank you for bringing this up.
Thank you Mayim, this video came right on this day. I am also one of the people who often stand "outside", Not understanding what the people around me are talking about. It is good to know that there are quite a lot of people with these experiences all over the world. I love the development of Amy in her relationship to Sheldon, it is so sensitively told and acted by you and Jim. Thank you Mayim for all the inspiration 👍❤️
"We're born alone, we live alone, we die alone. Only through our love and friendship can we create the illusion for the moment that we're not alone." - Orson Wells
Thanks, Mayim, I needed to hear this today.
Also 3.5!!! FTW and that face, I have that face!
Jennifer Campbell pathfinder tho
why?
What you're left out of, isn't always a bad thing. Leaves you available for other things, discovering life, not going along for a ride.
“I’m glad we found each other”. I’m glad I found you Mayim! 🤓
I'm so happy I stumbled on this video. I'm in therapy right now, its new for me, and the first thing I asked my therapist was "I feel like I'm always on the other side of the glass, never truly belonging anywhere, in any situation, or with anyone. Always unsure and constantly aware of how I don't belong" were working through it but you have no idea how good it feels to hear that I'm not alone in this feeling. Thanks so much, I needed to hear this today.
Thanks so much for sharing this. I especially appreciate it for my daughters who have inherited and embraced their mom and dad's geekiness and need to hear other voices than are own about life as a geek.
P.S. 1st Ed AD&D and 5th Ed D&D are the best.
I absolutely love how you spoke about how even if culture represents the idea of being different, actually doing so is challenging. I have deep respect for all the people who do on a daily basis.
I used to think that I was "different" and a "nerd", but now I think that I am totally normal and other people are brainwashed into being some sort of zombies. I am not trying to be disrespectful, many of the zombie people are my family, but honestly when you are being concerned what Kardashian is wearing (or not), rather than trying to work out how to supply solar energy to the third world or solve the world garbage crisis, than there is something seriously wrong with you. The planet is in strife and our very existence is under threat and I am supposed to worry what shade of lipstick is in "fashion"? Pleaaaaaaseeee. Give me a break!
I know
exactly!
No reason you can't do both. Why not discover new ways to how to clean the earth, power energy sources, get clean water to backward countries while wearing that cute new shade of lipstick that Kim K recommended. Why do you have to be one or the other. Is it possible to be both?
@@georganna.2371 some people don't have the time, energy, or interest to do both
Mayim, I thank you from the bottom of my heart for being who you are! I never fit and I now have my daughter who for sure does NOT fit in and yes it TOTALLY HURTS for me to see and for her to live with! Thank you soooo much for sharing these moments with us! You need your own talk show! Love you lots!
I have autism spectrum disorder and can relate so much to this video!
thebestwillow... me too 😊
Yesss
😃
Same. But for me, this is with sports.
You just described the way I feel so much of the time! Just replace the subjects that interest you with mine- and the feeling of being left out even when you're trying is still the exact same! I am challenged with this a lot- some days are easy because I don't care and I can just enjoy myself as I am, and other days it becomes painful and exhausting because I feel like no matter what I do, I will never be THAT, or good enough that people will just see me as cool and interesting and beautiful the way that I am. I am not alone- you are not alone- this makes it easier to tackle- thank you!
Don't know. I don't feel like a geek and FOR SURE I'm not part of the cool guys ... but I feel left out anyway. I don't care about a lot of the things the "everybody" seems to care about, but I don't really have an intelligent and/or amazing hobby/job/talent. So I wouldn't fit within the geek comunity nor the cool people ... I have to say though that I'm not a mediocre dull person either ... what am I??? A new species??? I think I just made a discovery here!!!
XD anyway, this videos are very, VERY interesting!
If you don't feel like you can be part of a certain community, don't force yourself. We are all different, so don't try to put a label on who you are to be part of a certain group. Enjoy what you love to do
True. Thank you ;-)
You don't have to be a genius at something to be geeky. I love superheros & sci-fi but are not academically blessed in anyway. My best talent is being slightly above average at art. I do however like talking to others who have the same interests & appreciation for things as me, most of those people describe themselves as being geeky, so I tend to veer towards them.
Like anyone I am a unique individual (an oxymoron i know) but I have found that a lot of self confessed geeks are generally less judgmental & don't try & make you feel bad for liking what you like, whether that be a passion for Star Trek or horses.
P.S. I think you are part of the majority of the populous!
You can join my fictitious group. We fit with no one. And the older we get, the more we like it. And ourselves. :)
I’m just now discovering your you tube channel. I am showing this to my 10 year old. We’ve had many conversations lately about how “different” she feels from the rest of her friend , no matter how much she tries to fit into their world. She’s very tall,beautiful, intelligent and interested in computers, reading, music and art. That doesn’t always fit the societal mold, but I have assured her many times that’s what makes her so interesting and fun.
I'm "nerdy" but I like celeb/pop culture too but it's still very difficult for me to communicate with "normies" due to my ADHD and other disorders.
There's no such thing as "normal" only people who live closer to the top of the bell curve. People who call themselves "normal" live there and those of us they call "abnormal" simply live further from the top/middle of the bell curve.
My brother and I have always been geeky, introverted and anxious. A couple of years ago we started going to video game conventions regularly and it really helped us to realise just how many people out there we have lots in common with. Embracing your differences is not only empowering, but as it turned out for both of us, very comforting too when you finally find a place where you "belong" without having to pretend you are something you're not.
tv and the world needs more women like you, inspiring.
Thank you so so much for this video and what you are doing. I had a very similar conversation a few nights ago with my daughter about this. She asked if things changed and got easier as I got older. I told her no, I just learned that I am happier being myself and the people that like Magic:The Gathering, AD&D, and my other hobbies tend to be better friends than the ones who don't.
It's hard to explain to a 12 year old that eventually (probably in college) she will finally meet people with similar interests and hobbies. She hates being in accelerated honors because she feels like it makes her even more of an outsider than she was originally. I couldn't tell her that it get's easier, because it really doesn't-you just learn not to care about people not understanding you or making fun of you. That sounds awful, doesn't it? I hope I'm wrong and my personal experience isn't what her future holds. Hearing or reading other nerds' thoughts and experiences will be very welcome.
Thank you again for doing this and I look forward to your videos!
I've always loved being a dork, macho, crazy, loner. I want to be left out. I hate fashion. I don't respect main stream anything. At 57 I'm still an odd duck, and just don't care what "cool" people thing, say, do, don't do.
👍👍👍👀👍👍👍
You hit it right on the head! You put into words what I haven't been able to for over 60 years. Thank you!!!
these videos need to be weekly!
I just fall in love with this woman every time she opens her mouth. You're a big inspiration for me and I just can't believe how insightful and brilliant you are. God bless you always!
I checked out your other videos, and have to admit that this one is the one that felt like I should respond. I was born on the outside, geek to the raw DNA, and found out that not only do I have Asperger's, but I'm epileptic, so much so that it's impossible for me to drive, hold down a job, or watch some anime without falling on the rug and shaking like a bad VHS transfer. I'm permanently on the outside. So, I've been walking through this human society for 54 years, but never been a part of it. I talk to humans, but I don't grok them at all, let alone in fullness. My humor is dark, weird, and bizarre ( Michael O'Donoghue, Hunter S. Thompson, Arthur Byron Cover, Spider Robinson, and H. P. Lovecraft are my favorite funny authors. ), and sometimes, I scare people. So, yeah, I'm a weird geek. If I was writing for TBBT, it would be far weirder than it is, and the audience would be scared to laugh at it. It does hurt to be different, but it's been hurting for so long, I don't remember it not hurting. I guess I'm used to it. ( Oh , and you're right. 3.5 is the best. )
Clayton George same here..very relatable.
You should listen to the Doug Stanhope podcast.
I'm so glad that you're "different". It makes you incredibly relatable and "real", in a very fake and surface world. That you'd rather come here barefaced and beautiful is so refreshing when most of us layer on the concealer to fake our way through it. You are so inspiring.
Yes finally someone who is talking the truth !!! I feel very much the same way , I felt like I never really fit in , I'm a girly girl who likes fashion and makeup but I also like watching Sci-Fi and reading Fantasy fiction , I could watch Pride & Prejudice followed up by a season of Game of Thrones , I relate better to boys than other girls cause I hate the bitchiness of girl groups , I'm a loner who loves animals and I'm a home bird yet I love to travel , I'm not afraid of blood or gore or anyone needing medical help yet I can't stand cockroaches ( spiders are okay though ;) ) I like fishing , history , vampires , cooking and classical music but I will throw on Pearl Jam every now and then to relive my youth ! I'm lucky I found a best friend and we've been married 17 years and have a boy and a girl , yes they are both geeks like me ;) but that gives us a special bond . I like being a geek , I like being the square peg ,I don't want to be another sheep , I want to enjoy my life and everything in it and not feel like I have to change to suit someone else so they feel more comfortable with themselves . Hope this channel does well for you Mayim , it's a breath of fresh air here on YT and I'll keep following you to see where the adventure goes next ;) Greetings from Ireland xoxo
its great to hear someone who is smart as her still feels anxiety about not fitting in . it can happen to anyone people need to let people be themselves and judge less and not act like they are better than everyone else.
Mayim for president 2020!
Regina Fallangie she's got my vote
Mine as well. ✋
The feeling of being different doesn't change over the years, the awkwardness of it. You just learn ways of dealing with it in more healthy ways and stop fighting and hurting yourself. It's still a terrible experience, but i've found it's less dramatic as decades go by. If you find yourself in an environment that's hostile to anyone that doesn't "fit in", get out if you can, find a safer and healthier environment. There's always a place to be who you are out there.
Thanks Mayim for touching this topic and the wise and kind words.
TBH, though I have always been a misfit (facial disfigurement as a child set me on that path), I have never, ever, wanted to be 'one of the cool kids' or even had any remote interest in what those kids liked. I lived in my imagination while they were aping their older brothers and sisters. I liked different music and fashion. I loved to read and to learn. And being bullied mercilessly throughout school made me want to be less like the 'cool kids' not more.
I found my 'tribe' in my late teens, and have been a happy alternative person ever since. It's not about fitting in. It's about finding the people who are *just like you*, who are on the same level as you. Whose jokes you get, whose culture you understand. I'd much rather spend an evening in the pub chatting about Farscape or Big Bang (I frelling LOVE your show!!) than gossiping about some celebrity or other.
"aping" ... epic... GREAT word!!!! :)
Just saw this video. Thank you for getting right to the heart of what it means to be a geek/nerd. I grew up being different like many others, and luckily I learned to adapt. My experiences in life led me to start a Facebook group called Talkin Nerdy for nerds of ALL types. At just under 1000 members (from all sorts of places), we've worked hard to create a safe haven for those who want to express their interests without being harassed or judged. Your video has spoken directly to the heart of our mission and philosophy. So, on behalf of nerds everywhere (or at least 1000 of us lol) I give you a heartfelt thanks. The Nerd Community supports you!!!
Mayim, if you have some spare time, it would make more then a day for me if you read this:
I just realized, you might just be the geakiest one on the entire show in real life. You are a scientist, you are a nerd/geek, you do youtube, you don't seem fake like most celebrities... AND you believe in science AND god. I want to write this to you, because you just became my favorite celebrity and probably the first role-model I ever had.
Many little kids, growing teenagers and even adults have a role model, but I could never say "that person is someone I look up to". I never took a super hero as someone I look up to, because I think it's just very unrealistic and I could never identify with singers, actors, or any celebrity I've known so far. The closest was probably Neil deGrasse Tyson, but then again, he does not believe in god, which is a huge point for me.
But you Mayim, are a person, who I look up to. I am currently studying computer science and plan to even want major in it as a doctor. I am only at the beginning, but I have the ambition to work for it. You really do inspire me and with that, you are the first person in my life to do that in now almost 20 years. I just want to thank you for talking to us, your fans. I want to thank you, for talking about topics, that are sometimes very controversial. I want to thank you, for giving me a role model.
You inspire me, and with all of my heart, I really do mean that. I love science, and I do believe in god and that this can go hand-in-hand.
I am sorry if you have some trouble reading this, for I am not a native-speaker. I hope you understand, what I wanted to tell you and what you have done for me. Continue to do those videos, they are very good.
I hope you are doing well, and if you read this: Please continue your day with the thought, that you just made a persons life alot more meaningful and happier and that you gave someone a person to look up to. A very good person to look up to.
Have a wonderful day :)
SirVampyr you made my day for writing about Mayim being your role model. I am a 62 yr. old woman all alone, with adult children on their own, & whom I am proud of. I have worked at so many occupations that my resume is way too long, & am currently going through an enormous number of changes, physically, mentally, socially & financially. I too have personally been struggling to find someone to be a role model & to emulate. Mayim Bialik has just filled that void for me. For many years I admired her talents as a scientist, as well as an actor. I just discovered Mayim's vlog (& your comment) & she added more to the admirable qualities I respect Mayim for: she's a Geek-Mom; able to balance a myriad of life's good & bad, work & play, & being different turning into joyously embracing one's uniqueness; she is proud of her Jewish heritage, culture, & religion - like you said above, "... AND you believe in science AND g-d. ..."; & I admire & respect so much more. I have never subscribed to anyone's online presence, but I did subscribe to hers. I can't get enough of her world view, personal view & religious pride! This was meant to be, (or as my mother would say in Yiddish, "beshert",) as I discovered her vlog while searching for an online connection to learn more about my observance of Rosh Hashanah & Yom Kippur, the Jewish New Year & Day of Atonement.
Gena Estrin, I am learning more observances as well.
With my oldest.
Now have tons of books to study and refresh my memory.
(I love to read.)😊
Hey Mayim! How dare you not respond to this heartfelt letter from SirVampyr. Seriously.....
SirVampyr Dear Sir-lol. Of one thing I am sure: God loves you & there is nothing you can do about it. Since I believe we are all one, this 66yr Catholic Nana feels free to say & mean this: I love you. Go with God.
You described exactly how I feel. I've grown up being obsessed with reading and writing. I love learning, and I hate missing college classes. I wear glasses, don't dress very fashionable. (mostly t-shirts, jeans, and converse.) I love Doctor Who, Sherlock, Star Wars, Marvel/DC, Tolkien. I've always been different from others, and never really able to talk to people my age because we simply have nothing in common. But suddenly it's cool to be nerdy, and wear converse and glasses, and not be very sociable. I'm not saying that wrong exactly, it's just kind of annoying that people are turning the way I've always been into a lifestyle that wasn't desirable until now.
My sons glasses are thick as Coke bottles, he has hearing aids, he's six and he is very different and I wonder if kids tease him because of his differences. He came home and cried for two hours yesterday. We try to talk to him but he has a hard time expressing what he is thinking and sometimes feeling. My wife and I are as different as you are, and we accept who we are and I hope my son will see that and like who he is!
I am sorry. That must suck.
Different people have so much to offer. It is others who don't see that. Different is not bad.
That is so sad if 6 years olds are already bullying a kid based on being a bit different. I hope you find a way to get him to open up to you, maybe try getting him draw or something if he finds it hard to vocalize?
If he is that upset there is obviously something wrong & you might be able to talk to the teachers/school & help him suffer a little less.
The world can be a hard for those who are different but we all have some power to help stop bullying & make everyone feel included.
cw2lido I understand. I, too, wear thick glasses and hearing aids. And, now, also an FM Loop (for hard of hearing people to have sound into their hearing aids to hear better). And I have Asperger's. And, I code websites and love X-Men and Star Trek. Yep, I understand about loneliness. It bites that this is what your son is going through. Please show him MY response to you, here, plus Mayam Bialik's video to assure him of that he is not alone in what he is gong through cus others are going through it, too. Then, also maybe get him friends that are similar so he doesn't have to be so alone.
He will grow up to be independent and comfortable with who he is if he has you guys for role models. Keep him occupied in hobbies or activities he loves. I have a cousin who is picked on for her weight and goes through the same thing but its gotten easier for her because she knows where to find her happiness now, in soccer and singing.
Finally! Someone who speaks my language and "gets" me. It is very difficult to have viewpoints and interests different from everyone around you. I am 63 and have lived this way since I was a child. Stumbling upon your channel was the best Christmas gift I could get. Thanks for sharing the real Mayim with us!
I'm non-stop thinking about consciousness, mindfulness and being human - but I'm also sarcastic, not "new-agey" - more down-to-earth with my philosophy. It's very hard to find people to relate to. I subscribed immediately. Cheers to all of us square pegs.
Thankyou so much for this. I sit at work and feel very left out when everyone is talking about how 'on fleek' something is and they tease me for not knowing the newest slang or celebrity. This video has made me feel really positive that other people are in my shoes.
"I'm geeky, but I'm still desirable...mmmm 😚" hahaha 😂😂
thank u mayim,for saying what many of us feel,different/unique
Thank you for posting this, I've never related to a video so much. I've spent most of my life trying to being normal and fit in to realize I was just being fake to myself. It wasn't until my 20's I truly accepted who I really was. It's still hard but I do feel more comfortable being who I am.
I adore you. Thank you for giving us geeks a voice! I will always be your fan.
It's always so good to hear other people discuss these feelings. I have been the outsider as long as I can remember. I don't fit in with my family, I never have, and now that I am grown and married I don't fit in with my husbands family. It hits me like a dagger in the gut to sit at one of his family dinners, seeing how well his sister-in-laws fit in. They all love sports, horror books and fancy restaurants. They look at me like im crazy when I start going in-depth about star wars or fantasy novels. My husbands newest in-law constantly says how geeky she is and what a dork she is, but she fits in with his family like a glove, even thought she has known them 3 years less than I have, she fits in 100x better. She plays sports with them, she's loud, she joins in every conversation. Meanwhile I sit there quietly, hoping the topic will change from basketball/football to video games, books or art. The worst part is its literally impossible to explain this feeling to people that do fit in. I love my husband, but he will never understand how I feel. He always tells me "they love you, of course you fit in!" but I know I don't, and never will. Its hard, but im trying to learn to just love myself, and be okay with not fitting in.
Agreed 100%
Really? Because I'm partial to AD&D 2nd Ed. I have the stuff for 5th Ed, but haven't really tried it out yet.
Wow ***** Where did that rant come from? Adonis Amarante said he agreed with Mayim 100% and I was making a joke about her saying D&D 5th was the best. Soooooooooo, where is the problem? Are we going with "Deep seated emotional issues" or "Internet troll looking for a fight"?
*****
1) HOW CAN YOU SAY YOU HAVE A BROADER SPECTRUM AND MORE EXPERIENCE IF YOU HAVEN'T PLAYED D&D?!?!?! Seriously, you have to play it. (And 2nd Edition rocks!) en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dungeons_%26_Dragons
are you a man? IN that case, marry me!
@Agnostic Atheist Ex-Christian I think it's more like onion layers. With the stink & tears.
Thank you Mayim!
I have a son who is pretty much Sheldon. Before Big Bang I kept getting advised to "have him tested" or " get him help" I knew he did not fit the main stream mould but he is an abundance of goodness. Now though he is accepted as another facet of the human experience with something to offer thanks to the work you and the cast do.
I am a computer geek. A World of Warcraft geek. I am also 42 years old. Still looking for that female geek. It sucks to be alone.
Why do you need a female geek? My husband is a geek & I'm totally not! We get along perfectly. Surely! Him being a geek gives me the extra time that I spend involved with my special-needs niece & nephew. I love entertaining, and we do it together, I feed everyone & have conversations & he has collected all the geeks & they are talking about this 'n that 'n the other in his den. However, we had to agree on a bunch of other things, like, recycling, paying taxes, our way of spending money, we have a strong religious & community conscience that unites us in our off times. Every Wednesday we Volunteer to go pick-up food for the Church Pantry. Every Thursday we pass out food to the hungry. That is four hours & four hours that we have spent enjoying what we do & each other... Differences do not have to be a bad thing. We met on a Plane trip arriving to Orlando, FL. We both lived here...enough in common to start a conversation... Just follow the lead of the talkative one & everything else, will fall into place.... Promise...
Christine De Jesus I wish it was that simple
i think everyone is special in thier own way. my mom met the love of her life at 47. theres hope, i promise you. do not change who you are for anyone. you should be loved for just being you
I met my boyfriend, now 45, 5 years ago. He's totally a computer geek, and so am I. Now we live together and play PC games together. There is hope for everyone, don't give up ;)
Pani Ka so how did you meet
Hi Mayim. I'm Chad. I just found your channel and I love it. As a kid I loved your show and it was if you were telling me that it was ok to be different. As adults you are still saying the same thing and I thank you for it. I'll be 41 in February and at times I still need to be reminded of this. Thank you for always being you even when it has been difficult. You inspire me.
I would LOVE to hobnob with your geekness!!!!
Ditto
So would I! :)
I love you so much!
Such an inspiration!!
I am 20 and I am an old soul.
I don't fit in and even though loneliness hits once in a while I have to admit that I am half happy that I stay alone most of the time :)
There is a certain comfort in your own company and sometimes this comfort turns loneliness into solitude ❤️
adore your shirt :D and totally agree with you also
Just found your channel. It's great. I can't believe Big Bang started 10 years ago. A friend of mine got me into it . He said to me "This is you". A few years later he passed away. Every time I watch BB, I think of him. Thank you for the joy. X
I think what you are doing is really great! I think you're going to help a lot of people!
It's been a few years since i've settled with the idea that Mayim is talking about.. Being different, not understanding some conversations, people😃. I have embrased it, im proud, and, when you do so, life is so much better, you find the right people around you. It's not just nerdiness, it's life in general.. But thanks for sharing..
I
Agreed!
Just found this. Thank you. Being different is hard. Being "different" and adding other life's happenings while you are young is even harder. And in my later 40s, I am learning more about me and learning to be okay with me.
Thank you, Mayim! That's such a beautiful message :)
Your honesty is highly commendable. I'm not a nerd, however I can't get into the same things you commented on simply because I consider them shallow. Keep in mind, as well, that your intelligence is a gift that is appealing regardless. So being a nerd is still better than being dumb and/or ugly. Society do lay some heavy rules on us...
A girl has to be more than just a pretty face for me.
I like a girl with a lot to make me think about. That's what I like about you, Mayim.
Jules Hinmon I wish there were more people like you.
This really hit home... I have always been left out of groups at school... and I think one reason is because I am not interested in what they like. You are amazing! Your are one of my inspirations! Thank you!
Yes, i can relate. Keep the videos coming. xo
I love that someone like you is finally talking about this!! I can totally relate!
love this video. Mayim you are such an inspiration.
Feels warm to see this. Thank you! I believe everyone is unique. I've been learning to be happy about being different.
i cant say how much i absolutely love this .
omg yessssssss!!!!!!! I needed this so badly today! I am a nerdy/ somewhat awkward outdoorsy gothicish woman working as a hairstylist, unfortunately my business attracts a type of woman that I don't usually fit in with. I try to relate but what you just said made me feel ok about it. thank you!
oh and being a vegetarian doesn't help either lol
I relate to this so much!
I am no geek or nerd, nor do I suffer from anxiety but I like to be different from different and accept that society or people around me do not understand how I approach things the way I do. I am a creative person with a different approach to many things and yet I do understand the last couple of videos that I watched since I have encountered your channel by accident. I believe you give hope and motivation to many out there and that is a good thing to do, you ease the worries of people and make them understand no matter who you are we all are beings with flaws that we ne need to understand and live with it becuase we're not alone.... Thank you for the great content, I now will follow this channel.
Geek = introvert? Cuz I don't think that geeks are the only ones with this problem...
You rock, your empathy to feel others pain and awkwardness is amazing. Thanks for letting many of us know that we have acceptance and we have value.
excellent video, congratulations, by the way i like you shirt!!! 👍
I dont consider myself as a geek person, but i do feel left out pretty much all the time, i dont drink alcohol and get wasted, i dont do drugs, seems like i dont do anything that is considered fun. Its nice to hear im not the only one, cause its true it hurts a lot...thanks mayim! Youre awesome!!!!
Thanks for doing this
OMG, you get me and you are like the only person who understands this feeling! i always feel left out and I'm always into "geeky things" but i never see anyone as passionate as me about these things and it makes me feel extremely left out. btw, i freaking love the big bang theory and you have really amazing acting skills! You literally made my day :)
I love ur shirt so much
Someone signed my high school yearbook with this: "Some people think you're corny and weird, but I think you're OK!" I struggled with that for a while. Now, with TBBT showing this to be actually COOL, I've started to finally embrace the things that make me different - things I'd hidden for so long.
Mayim you’re such a great person. I absolutely love your videos. You always make me smile. Your videos make me feel way better about myself. I’m a 17 year old socially awkward, introverted and pretty nerdy transguy. So yeah fitting in was never something I did. And not being accepted for being part of the LGBT community by the people that surround you doesn’t make life easier. But there’s one thing that has helped me through tough times for years now and that is the Big Bang Theory. I just wanted to say thank you🙃
mayim, I so understand you. ok, I am not strictly a geek but I always feel very different to others and feel like I can't relate to many people. however, I still manage to have an inner confidence in myself and I'm glad that you embrace that
I'm a nerd, and I think this Geek Chic thing is a fake movement. The people in the movement aren't geeks or nerds, they pretend to be. That's what makes it "inaccessible" to real geeks. These wannabee Geeks don't really want to learn about Geekdom, they just flaunt some superficial elements to show how "alternative" they are.
These wannabees think that Geekdom is about cosplaying, visiting a comic con and collecting a few souvenirs like bobbleheads or t-shirts, but being a true geek or nerd is much more than that, it is about learning and understanding the lore or the think you geek in, whether it is Dungeons and Dragons, Warhammer 40K, Comic Book universes, Star Wars mythos, etc and being able to have discussion around it.
Just found your videos today. I find this so refreshing. Informative, but also inspiring. Love it!
everyone of your videos make me feel better about being me im different to and i completely understand how it feels to want to be apart of a conversation but you can't that's me all the way you are amazing from the inside out thank you for making me feel less alone
Loved how simple you put the examples of what was geek in the past and how now it is becoming the norm. We have always been different one from another but it was not as accepted as today. Loooovee Big Bang Theory on how this is presented so you start to understand people around you! I have a geek 16 yrs old son and I'm proud of him and his geeky friends!!!❤❤
Yes Mayim!!! I really relate to your viewpoint. From a teenager's perspective I often feel like the main topics of conversation that people are interested in are shallow or superficial and may involve talking down other people. I would much rather 'banter' about the deeper and more intellectual issues. It would be great if you could expand on about how you avoid gossip and speaking negatively about other people
You just described my whole 52 years of life ... THANK YOU❣
GOD bless you❣🙏