What's A "Kind" Narcissist? (Signs And What To Do)
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- Опубліковано 15 жов 2024
- Did you know there are many types of narcissism? Because we are so used to the glaringly obvious displays of overt narcissists, who are often attention-seeking, loud, and in-your-face, it’s easy to overlook other types of narcissists, particularly the “kind” or the covert narcissist. To avoid being fooled by their outwardly kind nature, today’s video will be focused on what ‘kind’ narcissism is and what to do when you interact with someone who is a ‘kind’ narcissist.
Disclaimer: This video is created for educational purposes only and is not intended to substitute a professional diagnosis. #shorts
Writer: Daila Ayala
Script Editor: Isadora Ho
Script Manager: Kelly Soong
Voice: Amanda Silvera ( / amandasilvera )
Animator: Sarimopi ( sarimopi )
UA-cam Manager: Cindy Cheong
REFERNECES:
psych2go.net/signs-of-a-kind-narcissist/
One thing to remember. Everyone in some sense has traits of narcissism, we are human and aren’t perfect by any means. It’s totally normal to have self serving traits, work to better yourself.
Maybe you don’t understand NPD. Narcissistic traits and NPD are two different animals. There are zero nice NPDs. You’ll understand once they get through with you. They cannot better themselves
Exactly 💯!
This is a great comment. We should be self aware and realise alot of people are being narcissistic but that doesn't make them a narcissist. A true narcissist would not work to better themselves.
@@Samantha-gm8kvA "true narcissistic" can be a good person. Stop equating mental disorders with morality. Aa narcissistic can be self-aware of their problems with empathy and try their best to be good, they're people, they can and often are moral despite low empathy, stop treating them like monsters incapable of comprehending morality and being good.
It’s tough to tell this apart from the plain selfishness we all display from time to time
It’s on a spectrum.
true
Live with a kind narc and you'll know the difference. 😑
Depends how often and intense it is.
All ? Nah
Damn. I was watching this and I realized I’m a horrible person
What did you do?
I now feel like a kind narcissist and I’m highly ashamed of it
It could just be that you're sometimes selfish. Don't take it as an insult, everyone is selfish in some kind of way.
I’m not sure how to respond, so instead I shall thank you profusely
We're all just people, we all have good qualities and bad. We just gotta keep working on ourselves, and realize we're not perfect. That's just the way life is, and we also have to focus on our good qualities as well as our bad ones
Narcissistic traits =/= Being a Narcissist. If you're concerned, take your concerns to a professional.
There are many undiagnosed narcissists simply because by nature they don’t think anything is wrong with them. So those of us who are on the receiving end of their bad behaviors don’t really have the luxury of this distinction.
Narcs don’t know they are narcs and typically don’t go to Therapy
@@jkevinparkerBio-mother is an undiagnosed narcissist. She firmly believes she was never abusive, and upin first meeting, everyone I've told my childhood to, who has met her, has said they would have expected her of being abusive after first meeting her. She never acts the same with other people ariund as she does once the door closes.
She had CPS/DCF called on her several times a year, by my dad, paternal grandma, school counsellors and the school nurses and family of school friends pf mine. Nothinv ever came of any of it.
She had a friend at the local office who gave ger a heads up whenever she was reported and when an agent was heading to her house.
As far as talking to said agent and actually answering questions and telling them the truth... her threat was that the agent got to leave and go home, but we has to stay with her and if we spoke up about the abuse, we still had to deal with her afterwards.
≠ exists...
@@Podcast_F.Cyeah, just hold the = and here it goes
Have you ever noticed that depression and anxiety are often spoke about in 2nd person whereas more stigmatized disorder are almost always described in 3rd person? "If you have depression, you might experience these things" vs "if they are a narcissist, they might do these things". People with mental health problems that are more heavily stigmatized are more often treated as if they have no internal life and are incapable of complex thoughts and motivations.
This is such a thoughtful response to one of the most stigmatized personality disorders out there! Cool to see it!
thats fair, but most narcissists will never think there's anything wrong with them, and wont' consider themselves narcissists (along with other disorders).
Preach
@@Harry-et7dc This is not true. It is very common for ppl with NPD to recognize that they're having problems in their relationships, difficulty connecting with people, and even have narcissistic tendencies. Admitting to a highly stigmatized disorder is difficult for anyone and it's probably harder for people with a very fragile self concept. Having resources actually directed toward people with NPD would probably go a long way towards destigmatization and healing.
This video showcases that aswell lol
These channels treat the topic of sociopaths etc always as a force you deal with rather than a real thing people experience by talking of them in the 3rd person “they do this” “they may be harsh” “have you ever dealt with a narcissist(literally what they say in the video) while depression etc are treated in the 2nd person as a comment above said “if you have depression you may feel this” “you may have this”
I believe it’s high time for a god damn change especially in this channel,
I’m seeing the top comment concerned and ashamed cause this channel doesn’t talk about how narcissism is normal like depression or alleviate the topic by telling the viewers they can change
One of my closest friends is diagnosed with NPD, and they’re a genuinely kind and funny person who goes to therapy to help them with narcissistic traits, the same way you would for any other mental health issue. NPD is often demonized and that’s really not ok. People with NPD are people too and deserve to be treated as such.
They are called sub human inter species predators in many books by Psychologists. 😂
Some are good but it's rare but amazing work of Ur friend while some other ppl with NPD are well... Full of red flags is the least I can say
I “know” someone who’s a narcissist, and they are very kind, I feel bad that they feel so demonized because of their disorder. :(
They’re against “narcissistic abuse” too, like, abuse is abuse. No such thing as “narcissistic” abuse
Perfect definition of my narcissistic friend who always makes me crazy with her behavior. But she is also very nice and kind.
Just got through dealing with one. Cut her off bro. In a compassionate way. Watch how much better you feel afterwards, and thank me later.
My former partner I'm fairly sure is one. And it took me 10 years to say no to her. It's really hard to shake.
real
If you ever think that you're a narcissist then congratulations, you're not. Narcissist never thinks of themselves as narcissist.
Thank you kind internet dweller for debunking my suspicions 😭🥹
thank you for giving me more self confidence
THANK YOU SO MUCH 🙏 🤩
Lol I don't care even if I am
Thank you for giving me confidence that will be destroyed soon 👍👍 (whenever I try to get others to help me, I feel like a narcissist and end up helping myself, which is way harder sometimes)
The first symptom tells me I could never be a narcissist. I have so much empathy that it becomes a bit overwhelming from time to time.
“Have you ever interacted with a narcissist?”
Yes. I was raised by one. And I’m scared that I’m becoming one now.
I feel like this just described me practically to a tee. I wasn't expecting that to happen. Parts of me wants to think that this isn't the case, but the signs are pointing to this being true
"Have you ever interacted with a kind narcissist before?", hell, I think I might be one myself
If you are concerned about it, you are not. Narcissists are not able to self-reflect. It is one of the reason that they project their shortcomings onto others. It is much more likely that a narcissist in your life has gaslit you into thinking this way. Good luck.
I will speak from experience. This gets a bit iffy with self deception, but also in knowing what the truth is. Because it’s easier to express yourself in a narcissistic way it may be tempting to say this is the truth (you may go from having some selfish impulses or tendencies to rationalizing it as only caring about yourself), you may also notice instances where you feel a lack of fulfillment; the feeling of being narcissistic yet still having it leave a bitter or nonexistent sense of fulfillment/satisfaction may indicate that there are some views, judgements, or perspectives that you internalize which are incompatible and reroute your attention to self serving causes. If you want elaboration lmk and I can reply with a personal example
Everyone is a bit of a narcissist yes, because of selfishness and how you can determine it, some people are more wired to only think about themselves and never introspect or see how they may change. Some people only internalize self serving perspectives and make up for it by acting kindly and strategically. In my experience it lead to some sort of identity crisis XDD
It is also hard to determine or develop as a person away from narcissistic tendencies when you feel everything isn’t sincere
Exactly this
Can you give an example?
@@strawberrymilk1563 *Summary:* said things I couldn’t have meant because it felt like it would require no effort, stopped caring, thought I was simply narcissistic, looked deeper and realized it’s because I felt things required less patience and endurance, like life was one big loading screen; changed my perspective and helped me follow through with the challenge of following through.
*Detailed:*
It’s easier for me to shut down and ghost someone rather than take responsibility for my words and promises. This lead to a lot of friendships where at the time it felt I would be there for them on my end, but over time it would be clear I had no idea what those words really meant. As soon as it got overwhelming I’d leave, I felt bad but my self defense mechanism of apathy would take over.
This had me at the conclusion that I was narcissistic and self centered. Because I couldn’t bring myself to actually act when it involved anything but what I wanted in the moment. I felt in my emotions that I wanted to help others, but I’d look too deep into it and justify it like: “oh I just feel better when I comfort someone” and “everything can be traced to a selfish reason that involves survival.”
In the first place I never had to look at it that way, I could settle at the fact I wanna help people but I have a false expectation of how the process will go, which lead to a cynical philosophy which is a flaw if my goal is to treat others better. My conclusion was the following:
I had the deceptive belief that these things would take no effort internally because I grew up on videos games, where all you had to do was make decisions from a detached perspective without going through any human emotions or sensations or conflicting desires. As soon as I realized the grit I’d need to follow through on my words and try to think in the present moment, I operated a lot better with other people and in carrying myself as a person. There are still many unrealistic expectations which mess up my ability to act as I actually am, and that’s what I mean by “judgements, or perspectives that you internalize which are incompatible and reroute your attention to self serving causes”
Remind me of an old friend I had. He could be very, very cynical. I think it's important to remember that yes, people need to survive, and yes, they want a degree of success in their lives. But there's enough of that to go around. People's needs aren't exactly endless pits of despair. They can be trying to make a plan for themselves while also needing love, and wanting it for others, and caring about others. Those things aren't mutually exclusive. There's a lot of times when we can work together and help each other a long the way. That in itself is a very human need.
I think it's important to mention that not every narcissist is automatically a bad person.
I think I need to explain to you
Being a narcissist is a personality disorder and narcissists are actually emotionless people you might think Ur one because you have traits like them in reality having their traits doesn't mean Ur a narcissist unless Ur also emotionless it's quite rare to see a good narcissist if they are good they will confess it and have to check up with a phycologist a lot and will tell everyone one they know about their mental disorder and tell them about their manipulation tricks and ask them to warn them if they do find the narcissist doing one of these tricks and that's the closest way possible for a narcissist to live a normal life and being good
So U are right but it's also very rare to be a good narcissist as most of them won't even confess that they are one
@@Mariam-anyways What? Narcissists can still feel emotion, they just lack empathy. Where the heck did you get the 'emotionless' thing from?? Narcissists can also try to be better people, there's whole therapy for that.
There's also difference between actual Narcissist Personality Disorder and what the word 'narcissist' has come to mean, however.
@@Mariam-anyways I wouldn't say "confess", but rather "admit it to themselves that they're a narcissist".
@@Mariam-anyways man I'm not a narcissist
Some i can relate, but i don't act rude to anyone and I'm a bit shy person.I keep daydream about myself as successful.
This just described 90% of people with the remaining 10% being on such high guard that they let nobody close to them. I, myself, will never seek friendship again, nor even a regular aquaintence. I learned my lesson. I will not even seek assistance from anybody.
I would like to add that NPD and being a jerk are different things
Really
@@KhweziMsomi-f5t yeah, I think npd is an actual disorder?
Well it's all in a spectrum.
If I am a "kind" narcissist what can I do to make myself actually be interested in keeping my friendships with other people? I DO like my friend and I DO feel like I don't do enough. I have tried to put more effort to them, but I just lack the motivation. Is there a way to motivate myself to do better in this scenario?
See the good side of other people and hang out more with them to learn more about them?
I would tell my friend exactly how I'm feeling if I was you.
@@StoleSomeCookies It kinda is hard for me to talk about my feelings when it is concerning the other person. I'm afraid that it'll damage my friendship like it did with others. I kinda don't know what I'm doing wrong because others don't tell me no matter how many times i ask. How can i become better when people don't tell what I'm doing wrong... :/
@@baeldaikokuten_yj6792 Thank you for advice! I do see sides of good in others (how else would I find use in them /j). The thing is my friends tells me that we hang out enough at school during breaks that I just have to take their word for it and hope that won't damage anything.
Try to find one person or friend you really care about and are genuinely interested about, try to find what it special about them that motivates you and surround yourself with people like that.
i thought they'd say a "kind narcisist" is someone who believes they're better than everyone else,
but who legitimately tries to be a good person,
but may struggle to understand others's emotions,
btw i believe those are **possible**, but probable??
That's the kind I am rn
I'm self aware that I am indeed a narc
This video kinds fit me well but I don't believe I'm better than everyone else. Ik I'm in the bottom and it kills me. But I do think I'm attractive which is a trait that disgusts me the most
I knew a “kind” narcissist. A very charming and polite young man. Only this was just a mask to protect his image. He wanted to be liked by everyone. He would say and do exactly what he thought you wanted to see, but his behaviour changed completely the moment you weren’t beneficial to him anymore. Sometimes he would make me upset or even cry just for fun and laugh in my face about it. I did a lot of research on narcissism and decided to finally distance myself from him. My life has gotten much better since then :)
@@isabellevandenheuvel3619 i've seen up close someone upsetting someone else, then smiling and laughing as the other was feeling intense anger and sadness mixed
this person who would annoy the other, would almost always have alcohol as an excuse for that kindof behaviour
i don't think being drunk should remove accountability, but at least it was a good warning of things to come, since it almost always happened after it, and almost never without it
@@yokito0496lol
@@yokito0496 dont throw your self-confidence. Thinking you are attractive is such a good thing. Btw being a narcissist is good, manipulating and smart.
This video is gonna make everyone think they are a nice narcissist
No. There are in fact some egoistical of selfish people but they dont necessary want your downfall or see you sad or just dont want to open more. Covert narcissist are extremely attachant with you in the beginning, with extreme kindness, laugh, understanding, good behaviors, like someone you can put all your trust, share good moments,... Its like a person you’re never met, a « soulmate », a loving energy that brings you warmness, they stay and want to be with you every single day. They cant stand being alone and also, they want you to only be attached to them, to prioritize them. And bam! Once you are attached, they start slowly showing their shady behaviors, stings your self esteem by let you believe their negative opinion (subtly recorded in your mind) of you, by mocking you, belittling, being cruel and sadistic like nothing happened. Finally they abandon you during your worst days. They are so impressed and irritated and the same time by your kindness, your sweetness so they want to completely destroys you on the inside ! Its the difference. They know that they mentally abuse you and controls you by your insecurities/complex and will make them much bigger than they really are. Anyway, they always cause you troubles. They are evil inside. Some people think its ok but no. They want you to be stuffed with them and never fly with your own wings! They want you to forget who you are, and enter in their cage, supporting their broken negative self forever! And blame your self that is Your fault that he or she acts like a psychopath.
Fr
@@user-bh1yh3gr5u you're absolutely right.
They tried to do the "watered down" technique for the cutesy video, but this topic is a bit too serious and nuanced for this style. It's pretty misleading. The creator should probably go in depth if they're going to talk about something like this.
For real 😂😂😂😂😂
The more I watch these and the more I think "am I a narcissist? I don't think I like that I am"
Me too. But just watch out what you're saying yk. I did that and I realized that 99% of what I say is highly manipulative
@ravenqun Part of it is Autism as well, I'm not actually diagnosed as a narcissist, but I want to avoid being one at all costs
@@maxwellkowal3065 I'm not diagnosted either but I notice that I am one
@@ravenqun Upon a second rewatch, I do recollect feeling sad or regretful about speaking to people in certain ways or not giving enough to people.
@@maxwellkowal3065 Yeah I get what you're talking about. Maybe seek professional help
Bro I think I might be a kind narcissist 😭
Ur not the only one
There’s nothing wrong with being a narcissist lol being a narcissist doesn’t implie that u hurt others it just says u lack empathy and work mostly for ur own interest
@@jibsij3964not gonna lie, I find something wrong with that (though it def has something to do with how I was raised so please no hate 😔🙏)
@@AkumuIsSleepy nah why should anyone hate u for that statement? U didn’t attack anyone and just stated ur own opinion dw 😄
@@jibsij3964 I wish there were more people like you fr. Idk how old you are, but you're way more mature than most adults online lol
Yes I have and they ruined me as a person. I'm afraid I'll never recover
Yes I have and I promised myself to stay the heck away from them😢
I love this tipe of videos, as someone who suffered from many narcisistic relationships
"Have you interacted with a narcissist before?"
My mother is a narcissist.
same
same
same 😔
This is spot on, grade A content right here, keep up the good work
Speaking as someone who is like this, but does genuinely believe in helping others, I feel this is a psychological adaptation to help me survive--moreso authentically rather than physically--in a world that didn't care whether I did or not. And I notice this trait ... this quirk of mine becomes more exacerbated the more insecure I feel in life and vice versa.
But because I realize this, I want to try and channel these maladaptive qualities to help build a safer life for myself so I can stop constantly draining others without having to stop living; I mean others will suffer because of me still, but at least the suffering will stop this way without thinking myself above wanting to live like everyone else.
“Self indulgence. There is meaning in those great words…
If you don’t indulge yourself, no one will.”
-Garfield
The key difference between pleasing oneself in a good manner and narcissism is that the former is a situation of working to have everyone happy, including oneself, whereas the latter is first and foremost oneself, and everyone else an afterthought.
As with many things, it’s all a matter of balance.
Hmmm... either I am a kind narssasist... or I just need to get off my lazy *** and finally do a load of dishes like I said I would 3 months ago... hhmmm. ( -_-)
REAL
I'm flattered!
I honestly hate that I could apply all of these to myself and I wish it was easier to just change these things about how I act, the worst part is that I know that even after the guilt from this realisation resurfaces I’ll end up ignoring or just forgetting about it again. I really hate myself for it though so I can’t understand why I just act like this anyway
I'm just tired of throwing my time out there over others. I want for myself for a year with a prayer
Yep, as an person who gets to do with an narcissist everyday, wich seems to be the most kind person in our class, who sadly is my „friend“ (I try to get away from her) is this video very relatable.
So i've been slacking off on my narcissistic behavior! Thanks, I'll have to be there by noon tomorrow morning!
I score high on narcissism
Yeah same here...
winner bros
💛 I love you all
This channel was one of the first resources I used to realize that my home life wasn’t completely normal. Ever since then I’ve suffered for trying to validate my feelings and emotions in my own household. I pray for others that have to go through similar situations and it’s hard to get out of. Always remember if your parents don’t make you feel safe at home then it’s not your fault and your stronger then you realize
Overall, looking at it all these types of narcissists it seems like that’s majority of the population. I kind of think like we all have some type of narcissism in us
When I was younger I was definitely like this. I have learned better now and have worked on myself a lot. I’ll admit I’m still not perfect, and one thing not mentioned here is a lot of the time they don’t even realize they are doing it.
HAD A BEST FRIEND *EXACTLY* LIKE THIS
Yeah, I have interacted with a few narcissists in the past. Some are absolutely horrible while others can really teach you how to save your own skin in rough times
I don’t think I’m a narcissist as my friends always tell me to change my stubborn ways and I just ignore them and never said anything but they’re not giving up ;-;
I don’t say I’ll change my ways next time, I would just keep quiet and sometimes when my friend is late, I assumed that she is probably asleep and I was right. It was too early in the morning so it was understandable
yeah that’s just stubbornness
@@XerosOfficial yeah. There is no limit to my stubbornness
My stepfather is a narcissist. There was so many bad things but basically he was the sweetest and kindest person when he met my mum, but when they got married, it was just horrible, he would always seem and act so kind around other people but he treated us like crap and we had no freedom, by the smallest "mistake" we did or if we didn't do what he wanted he would explode, get very angry, yell and break things threating my mum that he would hurt me, once my mum wanted a divorce but he always said he was going to change and go back to the nice person the next day as if nothing happened. I was pretty young back then, my mum got help and currently they are divorced, but it was definitely an experience, I remember just being 8 years old and always locking my room door covering my ears crying.
They mirror you. Coverts, you actually fall in love with yourself. Let that sink in🤯
I must continually look out for these negative qualities in myself and change.
i feel like i’m like this, but it’s hard to change since i’ve been like this for a while at this point
It's pretty hard,but you can do it! Ik that sounds pretty off coming from a stranger you've never met but keep trying^^ it will take time^^
I am a narcissist, passed down by my dad. I love how this makes us all come off as horrible people
I want her to narrate my life story ✨.
I love this bloody channel every topic they cover they do a great job
My ' BEST FRIEND (Actually Fake friend)' is a kind but dengerous Narcissist.
Narcissism sounds like extreme survival skills, prioritizing self no matter what 😵💫
Bro I swear you could come up with some sort of different way to describe someone through a negative personality and it just makes everyone who watches these videos somewhat paranoid. Now I don’t know who to trust because they could be a ‘kind narcissist’ smh.
.A lot of people do not understand the operations of the exploitation of ignorance, or exploiting a thriving market with a low quality product, or taking advantage of people's need with a fake product. And these are things we should become aware of since the internet (or youtube rather) is the teacher of so many. There's no such thing as "kind narcissism" because narcissism has nothing to do with kindness unless you mean manipulation tactics.
a "kind narcissist" is not some evil spooky villain to be afraid of. i am not going to jump out from the bushes and attack you, or drive over to your house in my narc-mobile to cause chaos and terror. i am sitting in my room playing the sims 4 right now. i really have no interest in going out of my way to antagonize or abuse random ass people. or anyone💀 if someone is abusing you, then that's what to be afraid of. behaviors. videos like this using fear mongering tactics to group everyone with an illness together to make them seem some kind of evil threat to society should really be ignored
My mother is a forensic psychiatrist and I have done extensive research into personality disorders lately and became aware of one in my life. How it was explained to me is that a narcissist will make you feel differently than other people will, it's a sort of negative kind of heavy emotion you get when you think about how much you like them or what they mean to you. They might seem like they're above other people and even exceptional, but instead of the normal feeling of admiration you may notice feelings of heaviness and a hint of negativity when you examine them and their behavior
@@vburge04Narcissists don’t treat people well , so yes if you are a narcissist you are someone everyone should be wary of . What are you talking about , stop downplaying how damaging narcissists are to people around them.
@@WillArtiguesi kinda feel this
Their praises dont sound genuine or real
It feels like they are just saying it only to just *look* nice
It just sounds sarcastic
But when you are going to communicate with them you will see their narcissistic traits
Well, my “best friend” of almost 5 years is a kind narcissistic. Thanks for letting me know!
For those who are confused,this explanation is like playing with you mental health and basically say that :WE ARE ALL NARCISSIST 😅😂
F
Fffffllcv
Not really, there surely are some differences
Most people are narcissistic
Yes... same 😅 confused... feels like.. how much is your measure on the scale.😂.
I was born to a narcissistic father. I know nothing will change, but he's really good at deciving, and I have nowhere to go. I try to warn others about his nature, but in the end, no one believes me. He also makes sure I have no one to rely on. It's like I'm stuck in quicksand, and the more I struggle to get out, the worse it becomes for me. I've given up. I just go with the flow of life and hope I can survive another day.
These are the worst people to deal with. Such a waste of time and effort.
Agree
also agree
Yeah 💔, it hearts so much. You feel like such a fool to friend a narcissist
I might be a better person than I thought! That’s reassuring
Sounds like me with Frank, but I manipulate for the kids... not myself.
~Tucker
Just love yourselves people remember don't put others ahead of you and think to yourself that what you want is not important put them beside you. :)
My brother whole personality described in a 1 minute video 💀
Literally described the person that caused me so much pain and trauma
I mean… that’s just like me BUT i have a to be this way till i get to student council.
So i have to kinda be this way
my best friend was a narcissist. not a kind one. she’d never really ever care. id vent but she’d never even try to comfort me, always just saying “I don’t know what to say” meanwhile im trying my damn hardest to comfort her, relate to her, be like her, and just be there for her. her pride won’t let her admit she’s wrong. I’ve never heard her apologize for arguments we’d have that’d leave me sobbing to my therapist about how much I hate her yet just can’t leave because if I did, I’d literally just be alone with nobody to talk to.
I’m glad im away from her. with a better friend who takes care of my needs more often.
my roommate seems more like this as time goes on but his mom is part of the blame
"Everyone has a monster inside their heart."-Johan Liebert
Kind people only act kind to test fate, they tend to realize good things come from acting kind thus most people kind people only think about their own benefit deep down.
I fall into this category that's for sure 🙃
Self estime, self control ,self respect, don't overthrowing, don't overthinking, realize what you do wrong fix it, don't destroy each other, love one another ❤😊you welcome ❤
The first narcissistic person I interacted with was my best friend. We had known each other since I was three and she was two so basically our whole lives. Honestly she's always been the type of person who wants control over everything but I never really minded it until last year. Last year was when all those bad qualities of her's went to the extreme. She made me feel like I was an awful person and if I said what my opinion was she would get mad if it was different from her opinion. She was very much unforgiving of the smallest mistake or none mistake that she made me feel like was a mistake. Like if we played a game and I accidentally went on her turn she would make me feel so bad that I would just walk away full of guilt over absolutely nothing. One story that ended the friendship was went she slapped me for leaving class without her, I tried to explain what she did was wrong but she laughed it off with a joke. I had tried to keep it to myself until my next therapy session but I was crying myself to sleep and I couldn't do it because it was too painful. I quietly made my way to the living room where my dad was. When he looked up I was crying and he got really concerned so I told him what happened and he went to go wake my mom up. We did our best to make an excuse as of to why I wasn't going to school with her the next day, it worked. I ended up writing a carefully written letter to end the friendship and my mom gave it to her mom after reviewing it. She sent one back but her mom did not review it and there was lots of narcissism in it that I saw right through. She even added a bribe to keep us friends by sending a little pin. We are no longer friends and I'm a lot happier but still working through the trauma with my therapist.
You sound so strong, beautiful and intelligent. You will find people who cherish you and show that. Hope your healing is going good ❤️
@@nandeetaprasad7763 thank you! I’ve had tons of help and healing since I posted this but I really appreciate you sending encouragement🥰
Never really thought about this but it might be so true!
I've never really come close to a narcissist, because I know who to stay away from.
I guess my brain can tell who's bad news immediately.
this might be my best friend. either that, or she’s genuinely too oblivious to realize that empathy is a thing.
Sure, narcissists are not right and such, but they are still people, and should be treated with kindness.
treated with kindness until they decide to act wrongly, just like any other person
Absolutely 🇮🇳🚩
I don't think so.
they are conniving and manipulative and we'll take anything of value from you
@@leepiper4621 true. That’s why silence is appreciated in friendships. I have a lot of time
@@err0rc0degames Look, I get that you’ve never came in contact with a narcissist, but that doesn’t mean you have to come in here and say your wrong teachings. Narcissists are people too, and should be treated with just as much kindness as anyone else, and saying otherwise is saying that all humans shouldn’t be treated equally.
You just described my sister word for word
haruhi suzumiya be like:
but she's the best girl
LOL
Mother Theresa... At first glance she was kind, generous, helping the helpless. Dig deeper, she was a damn monster.
Releating to this honestly.
They’re extremely dangerous, because they are passive-aggressive. They plan and groom their victims. Think of an overt (aggressive) as a rapist, think of the covert as a pedophile. They groom everyone around their target to dismiss the target’s anxiety or anger at being abused as the problem - victim blaming. The worst part of being abused by a covert, is not being believed and getting help.
There is more than enough misinformation on narcasstic personality disorder for you try such a low move. They are not remotely the same thing. That is like saying depression & psychosis is the same thing. 😂 Clearly you are bitter, & would like to share your hurt with the world for validation.
I have covert / vulnerable NPD, and that’s not true at all- in fact, most of my self-fixation is fearing that everyone hates me, and criticizing myself for every single thing I do. I feel either worse or better than everyone else in fluctuation, but fundamentally feel misunderstood and different - but I definitely do not ‘groom’ people, as I’m very introverted, keep mostly to the sidelines, and also have empathy, despite what you might’ve heard about NPD (lack of empathy is not a required trait, most of us actually do have empathy for others!)
Yes
I have such covert one in my neighbourhood
What a piece of work!!!!!
Yes and I hate her.
Her name is lea she's always making people me included feel like we aren't worth it like one day my best friend gave me a bunch of sea shells but lea was next to us and said "what about me?" Like that is so rude both of us wanted to hit her.
(I still have the sea shells their in my room😁)
This girl I talked to for a while labeled everyone as a narcissist it got very exhausting
Second!
They can be generous but everything is about control and having their way. When dealing with people they can’t receive validation and praise from their “dark side” comes out.
first!
Yes you are first
I'm a little bit but I'm taking care to be better day-to-day, thank you for pointing me this :D
I'm related to many different types of narcissists! Has had a terrible impact on my mental health
Partner says it is best to promise something and make the person happy, and they will find out later they aren't getting whatever it was.
I’m always scared I am a narcissist, any time I talk it’s about myself, and I will constantly have to remind myself the world doesn’t spin around me, I just wana be a good friend.
I always knew something was wrong with me. This video really opened my eyes, cus damn. That's literally me.
50. Your videos has helped me alot. Thank you.🙏🏻
Yes, zakaria. She always that kind of bullies me like she's using me. Cause she knows I'm nice and then she gives me something or makes me feel happy trying to get on my good side
I just broke up with someone like this in my life. When i said i didnt want any more gaslighting it was verry mutual. There wasnt any quality left in me if i was not firmly stuck under their thumb😊
I think you're talking about a specific variation of Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) known as the vulnerable narcissist. Vulnerable narcissists come across as altruistic, prosocial, sacrificing and selfless, and say negative things about themselves, but it turns out, they still want you to see them as kings, queens, emperors, empresses, lords, presidents, angels, gods, goddesses, superheroes, superheroines or whatever it is. Although they seem to enjoy doing good things, they love the way it rubs off on their public image
Dated a guy like this for way too long. He’s now engaged to the granddaughter of an Italian princess. He got the nobility he wanted after all… good luck to her
Yes!!! This is why I was stuck for so long. 😢
the last part is exactly me like just looking at someone or what they do or say Ik what to Expect from them, like if they’re mean then i’ll obviously Try not to get them upset or anything or do things to Befriend them and usually go with whatever they say to become better friends
wow, i never thought to think this could be a thing. whenever i think of someone who shows signs of lacking empathy at times and yet shows mock kindness and friendliness, i always just assumed that was sociopathy
This is just the kind of friend i had to cut of recently. He was a close friend for years,its a shame.
Still set boundaries 100%
Watched this and realized I’m a shitty person, I’ve been watching psych 2 go for the past couple days now and realize that I am NOT in good shape (mentally) you guys are really helping ❤
Im a kind narcissist and i care more about others more than myself according to my school mates, and i let my friends hang out with others, and i don't fake my attitude, i just like being nice to others :)
And im ashamed of myself for being a narcissist :(
I fall under this category except I don’t try and tell them that I’m going to do better and that I’ll just inevitably burn out and want to move on to other projects but they never care they just want my help anyways and as much as I appreciate the sentiment it breaks my heart that none of their hard work will ever be completed and that it’s my fault.