Complicated Grief Healing | Coping with Trauma and Loss
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- Опубліковано 15 тра 2024
- Dr. Dawn-Elise Snipes is a Licensed Professional Counselor and Qualified Clinical Supervisor. She received her PhD in Mental Health Counseling from the University of Florida in 2002. In addition to being a practicing clinician, she has provided training to counselors, social workers, nurses and case managers internationally since 2006 through AllCEUs.com #Complicated Grief | Coping with Trauma and Loss
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CHAPTERS:
00:00 Counselor Toolbox
00:27 Complicated Grief
00:40 Objectives
01:23 Definitions
05:16 Complicated Grief 1
09:12 Complicated Grief 2
09:13 What Exactly Are We Talking About?
13:50 Grief Takes Time
18:27 Grief Impact Us Holistically…
20:51 Physical Responses
22:54 Intellectual
29:03 Social
34:49 Emotional
40:17 Spiritual Beliefs are Challenged…
41:54 Common and Unique…
42:44 Complicated Grief
43:07 Models for Normal Grief
43:37 Bowlby 1
46:34 Bowlby 2
49:20 Bowlby 3
51:18 Grief is Work: Worden’s Four Tasks
56:15 Alan Wolfelt’s 6 Reconciliation Tasks
1:00:42 Rando’s 3 Phases and 6 Processes
1:02:23 AVOIDANCE
1:02:51 CONFRONTATION 1
1:03:29 CONFRONTATION 2
1:03:49 ACCOMMODATION
1:04:53 Rando’s Treatment Approach
1:06:23 Risk Factors for Complicated Mourning
1:11:18 Rando: Treatment Tips
1:12:38 Remember the Five Areas of Focus
1:16:16 Summary
1:19:31 Counselor Toolbox
👌More videos can be found on this topic at: ua-cam.com/play/PLcB3trehXswg6FS0YzaQLwvX7jj1avd_F.html&si=T0Xm154Gm21Rrv-P
❤️Self help activities and worksheets and concierge coaching with Dr. Snipes can be accessed at DocSnipes.com
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It’s really sad to me that I have to go on UA-cam to get good information about my mental health. No therapist I’ve ever seen have ever explained any of the things I’m learning here. Thank you for what you do!! Without you I’d still be stuck in my old ways! This one is a hard one for me. I’m grieving the loss of all three children. One passed away and the other two stolen by the state. My dog just died too. Also my son died in a very traumatic way that makes me blame myself everyday. I’ll probably never believe it’s not my fault but if I at least find some coping mechanisms it won’t be so hard. Ty for reading if you made it this far.
I am sorry that happened to you. I appreciate you being here and watching
I'm so sorry for your loss. 🙌🙌
I'm so sorry this happened to you. 😢 I understand the state thing. My God daughter was murdered and I've had two still births. Not the same but definitely profound change. I'm grateful for videos like this. Thank you for sharing. Sending hugs and peace.
I'm so sorry this happened to you. 😢 I understand the state thing. My God daughter was murdered and I've had two still births. Not the same but definitely profound change. I'm grateful for videos like this. Thank you for sharing. Sending hugs and peace.
@@DocSnipes i lost my boyfriend to MIND last year his name was Jesse i stood by him and i loved him and misses him badly what kind girlfriend i was to him and how long the pain be in me ??.
I can't stop crying - I have lossed both parents, and much more - I feel so empty and lossed. The tears will not let up right now
Condolences on your loss. Wishing you peace, health, and happiness. A local, licensed counselor could help you process your grief.
Crying is good; it will get better. So sorry.
I pray that you run out of tears; that you can exhale and inhale and love your self.
Same, loss my parents and only sibling. I’m so sad but holding on to God. He is the only one who understands 🙏🏽 The Bible says, God is close to the broken hearted and He bottles up our tears. He sees us and will help us get through this 🙌🏽
I too have lost my parents almost lost my child. Both sides grandparents and I'm an only child and never really had a real connection with anyone else on either side of the family. I've become an orphan and have been stuck resisting, then sabotaging and resisting the resistance. 😔 Didn't really have parents around growing up either. Dad worked all the time while mom did whatever she wanted the pain has been constant and idk how I manage or how I'm still here but I'm awfully tired 😩
I'm using this video today during my grief group therapy. I'm already crying because in this past year I lost my little dog that I had for 12 years, my husband left me 3 weeks ago and my son moved to Florida last July. I feel empty. Plus I had stage 3 breast cancer three years ago and lost my breasts. I'm hurting so badly right now but each day I have to put on a happy face for my patients. 😢
Lost my husband, best friend, liver, partner. Now I’m lost without him, no dreams, no future, alone, empty.
I am sorry about your loss and I am grateful for you being here and watching the video. What tips from the video will you use to cope with grief?
I'm so sorry about your husband, my deepest condolence to you, trust me I completely understand how you feel, I lost my wife 3yrs ago to a horrible heart attack, it was a terrible experience for me but I kept strong for my little daughter hoping for the best future for her, time does heal the broken heart expecially when you're around the right people, I’d love to talk to you more and have nice conversation more privately if you don’t mind .?
I hope you’re doing better now
I hear you.
I lost my partner about 4 months ago. This is one of the better discussions of grief that I have found on UA-cam.
I am sorry for your loss.
My grief is neverending, because he is not dead. If somebody dies, from there you could start recovering, in a way. He is alive but he got very mentally ill and he is always in my life, so there is never a starting date to start recovering for me, every day is a trauma day and a nightmare grief day. He is totally gone but not gone, but he is totally gone
I am sorry about that.
After Nancy died. I signed a DNR for myself. If I get diagnosed with any terminal condition, I am just going to opt for palliative care over ravaging treatments. I would have fought anything like crazy to be here and take care of my sister. Now that she is gone and I am alone, nature can take its course.
I am sorry your sister is gone. Other videos that might help you cope with grief can be found at: ua-cam.com/users/DocSnipessearch?query=grief
I've lost everything everyone else mentioned, 3 dogs, sister, husband, 4 kids, 2 parents I took care of with alzihiemers, my breast implants due to illness. My best friend, my job of 13 years, now my house, my entire life. Moving across country alone now. Leaving the last place I had my family in. My parents died in , my doggies died in and i had the love of my life in . I have no will to live. But I'm trying. All loss hurts but I'm not sure I can bounce back after losing all this in a year and a half.
I am so sorry for your losses and I appreciate you watching the video
I'm so sorry about your husband, my deepest condolence to you, trust me I completely understand how you feel, I lost my wife 3yrs ago to a horrible heart attack, it was a terrible experience for me but I kept strong for my little daughter hoping for the best future for her, time does heal the broken heart expecially when you're around the right people, I’d love to talk to you more and have nice conversation more privately if you don’t mind .?
The time of grief is personal and non-linear. It is related to individual history and the management of past losses.
Yes, you are right. Thank you for watching the video
Thank you for mentioning the loss of a sister. The grief community does not recognize this devastating loss. There are support groups for all other relationships except adult sibling loss. My sister died almost three years ago. My life has been such a void since. Nancy was born with some mental disabilities. We were best friends. After both of our parents died I became her legal guardian. We lived together all but 11 of her 63 years. I love her so much. Nancy was my purpose in life. I have no purpose in life now. I am all alone. I hurt every day. It took me two years to cope enough to pick out a cemetery plot for her ashes. It all seemed so final. I am a mess.
I am sorry about your loss and I appreciate you watching the video
I understand that feeling of no purpose for sure. I only know taking care of my kids and being a wife and taking care of others. The few people who i do know just don't get it . Which doesn't help. Reminds me nobody is here anymore to comfort me. Or care anymore.
I'm so sorry. You 2 were much closer. Yet, I still grieve the loss of mine 3 years, later.
My grandpa was watching me on the day he passed. I was 6 yo and he was eating chicken & rice. He started choking and I’ve tried helping as much as I could, I ran outside to look for help. Ran back inside and he was still choking, I untied his shirt and patted his back to help him, but it wasn’t enough. He started foaming at the mouth and then he passed. My aunt finally arrived and total chaos afterwards, when everyone found out.
I don’t believe I dealt with this as a child, but here I am 24 years later and it hurts me like it was yesterday. My grandpa was just as important as my parents, he was my main caregiver during the day, when both my parents were working.
None of the adults thought of speaking to me or taking me to a specialist, thinking that I was just a child and not really get what was happening.
The wake lasted almost a week, freezing weather during this time of the year, and they had a choir during every day of the wake. The funeral day was so hot and sunny! I remember my father, only 26 at the time, crying and smoking cigarettes, one after another, while on our way to the cemetery.
What hurts the most is that these memories are most vivid, and the beautiful ones of my wonderful grandpa are fading away slowly. My mom always reminds me how much he loved me and how much he cared for me, and that everything he did was for me to see me smile. I live every day thinking about him, and how much I wish I met him now, what we say to eachother, would he be proud of who I have become? So many unsaid thing.
Angel in Heaven, watching over me, I love you and will forever keep you in my heart, mind and soul!
I'm so sorry for your tragic experience. How helpless you must have felt. I understand about no one getting you help to process this experience and your loss of your beloved grandfather. I experienced the loss of my brother in a different way.. he and my parents had a fallout and he became estranged when I was a teenager.. it was all about their pain and their loss of the relationship. I had no way of reaching out to him and would've have even tried as it was implied that would be disloyal to my parents.. There were no cell phones, no computers, email, etc. It wasn't until years later that it occurred to me that no one was there for me. I thought all along it was my parents loss only. Plus, it was like a family secret, he was never mentioned to others. I was told not to bring him up as it was painful for them. Then I went through some anger and resentment that my feelings were never considered. This all occurred decades ago. Actually, the same thing happened with my other brother, my only 2 siblings. By then there were cell phones but again, the message was clear... I would be disloyal and uncaring to reach out to him. It's easy for someone to read this and think I should have called him... which I secretly did a few years later, but what we do and don't do are highly influenced by our upbringing. I'm sorry for all you experienced. I hope you've been able to heal over time. Blessings ❤️
Your story is heartbreaking. The pain you obviously still feel isn’t anything anyone else can or imagine feeling. Our experiences in this life are so similar but so different. You have probably never met anyone else who has experienced that same situation. It’s so difficult to understand life’s everyday challenges, but you can at least talk to your friends and loved ones about it but this???? This sounds Excruciatingly painful. Nothing compares. I hope you find healing, comfort and peace in your life. May you have an abundance of blessings in your future . Don’t let anyone compare their stories to yours. Yours is unique in every way. Theirs will never give you comfort or peace. It will never make you feel better only them. Don’t let it make you feel worse because they can’t relate to you or your experience. I pray you find someone that can help you process your pain. Take care of your heart, and be strong for yourself and your Grandpa.❤
It will help to write him letters . I know it sounds weird, but that’s a good way to go through this pain and feel the empathy space in your heart..
Thank you so much Dr Snipes. I lost my father in February and can relate to all the symptoms that you described. It is of such comfort to know that this is part of the grieving process - memory loss, inability to concentrate, sleep issues, anger and feelings of hopelessness. Listening to you was like wrapping myself in a soft blanket with a warm cup of cocoa. I have learnt so much from this podcast but mostly to be kind to myself and give myself time. You are not only a very talented therapist but also have a big heart.
I am terribly sorry for your loss. Sending healing thoughts.
This was one of the most comprehensive and informatal pod cast I ever heard. This this and this word for word. The woman literally asks the exact questions that one has to thereselves during this time and give answers. Absolute understanding over this. Thank you for this video it literally gave my thoughts questions and answers over all this knowing someone gets it. Sometimes someone that communicates they been through things and understands is a major aspect to this healing,
My beautiful kind selfless mother passed away yesterday (March 11, 2022) and I cannot express the depths of my sorrow, sadness and the emptiness I feel. She was the most wonderful person I’ve ever known. She was the source of all joy, the rock and the life of our family. I really cannot see how I can recover when we had hope and she seemed like she was going to make it. I just wish I had one more week, one more month and one more year with her. I pray pray pray I get to see her again.
So sorry for your loss. Thanks for watching. Wishing you peace, health, and happiness.
@@DocSnipes thank you. I appreciate your kind thoughts very much.
March 11 my mom's sister died too 2022 ,😭
You aren't alone. I lost my Mom Oct. 2022 and I still feel lost, helpless and on an emotional roller-coaster. It's like learning to walk and talk all over again even though we were independent when they were alive. I am the only child and I am traumatized. ❤
I'm so grateful you said that mourning 2-3 years is normal. My husband died suddenly in 2020, right as the pandemic was starting. It was extremely traumatic finding him on the floor and then trying to save him while I had 911 on speakerphone. His death has been just devastating. I grew up in an alcoholic home and then married (and later divorced) an unreliable man. Until my Gabriel, I never felt I could count on people for much of anything, including basic needs. now that he is gone, I find myself feeling frustrated and helpless when I need help, and people flake out. For the most part, I am independent, but there are certain physical things I can't do because of limitations. Also, I don't trust people, especially men. I feel like a target out in the open and have experienced others trying to take advantage of me in my vulnerable state, so I withdraw from society. I'm lonely, but I'm lonely for HIM... if that makes sense. I am slowly trying to re-enter life, but it's not easy, and there are a lot of tears.😔
Sorry for you loss. My condolences. Thanks for watching. Wishing you peace, health, and happiness.
Your angel Gabriel is there with you. Helping & protecting, encouraging you to live on for his sake. We have just a blink of time here & will be reunited verrrry soon. I was my folks' caregiver, & after their late 2020/ 2021 deaths, was in a stormy cold isolated ocean of grief. Listening to "Helping Parents Heal" speakers at youtube has sooo helped, as we all can, like a breaved parent, feel responsible for the departed we loved so dearly.
I feel you so much on this, friend. My husband died suddenly and unexpectedly. I discovered his body and he was beyond help at that point. He was my life and my soul mate. It's been nine years since he died. Still lost and heartbroken. I send you a big hug.❤
@@sunshine9122 Big hugs right back to you. May we find peace.❤
I'm so sorry about your husband, my deepest condolence to you, trust me I completely understand how you feel, I lost my wife 3yrs ago to a horrible heart attack, it was a terrible experience for me but I kept strong for my little daughter hoping for the best future for her, time does heal the broken heart expecially when you're around the right people, I’d love to talk to you more and have nice conversation more privately if you don’t mind .?
Thank you for being a guide for those of us grieving 🙏🏼
I lost my sister, then my health, then my 27 year marriage and did not get to keep any of my memories…. I feel so STUCK. Thank you for addressing this on this platform. There is a great deal of trauma too due to stalking after my divorce and am getting into more intense direct therapy. I try hard to focus on joy, and not overthink my losses. As I know it’s already overwhelming enough, but am so stuck in the process. I can only pray I will someday feel again, as I did, before my world was flipped upside down.
Thanks for watching. Wishing you peace, health, and happiness.
So sorry to hear about your loss.
@@DocSnipes thank you, compassion is a beautiful gift. Thank you also for posting such helpful information.
I wish you well on Your healing journey, as I am on one as well ❤️🩹 it can be done.
Thank you for your videos. Lost a close friend, only 26 years young. Glad to have this information to navigate the grieving process. My husband considered him a brother. This has left a huge hole in our hearts, he had so much life left to live. But we must go on .
Thank you so much I didn't know what this was and been stock in this stage after been the care taker for my Mom.
Thank you so much for all your hard work.
Thank you for mentioning your stepfather's recurring reaction. When I was 35 a friend told me I got depressed every February and I brushed the comment off because we lived in England and after 4 months of winter everyone's depressed right? Then when I was 42 a doctor pointed out that I only ever came to see him on February 6th and I finally started taking notice. When I looked back at my life I had left jobs, husbands and friends on February 6th. My mum had died suddenly on that date. I'm 71 now and still have problems every Feb 6th, accidents or ill health - it seems my body is at a low ebb around that time.
Wow, my mom passed away this last February 6th. Know that there’s another person out there missing their mom on that day too ❤
I lost a dear friend when she was murdered by her fiance 9 years ago .. I still miss her to this day!!
I am sorry about your loss and I appreciate you watching the video. You can find more videos on grief at: ua-cam.com/users/DocSnipessearch?query=grief
What a blessing to hear this..going through a major grief after 27 years of marriage. It is only two and a half months. God bless the speaker..very informative and relieving and comforting. Thanks for all your hard work.
Best wishes to you. Thanks for watching.
It will get better eventually. Some people stay in the shock phase, usually the first few months,longer than others. Often waking up our minds have not yet process what has happened so we may wake up with the expectation the person is still with us and we slowly reach full consciousness the reslity hits us...it is a terrble shock alll over again. This reaction will eventually go.away as our minds gradually take in the person is gone.
SOMETIME from generally three to six mos we are suddenly hit with the permanence of this loss..before that we may have been somewhat numbed by shock. This realization of permanence is.part of the process. Our minds can only take so much pain at one time and our minds actually protect us from being overwhelmed by pain. Our minds are built to take care of us we eventually realize later.
This second phase is usually the toughest phase. Gradually we finish the practical things that have to be done. Gradually we start to think about the future without the person...this can be a confusing time thinking about options for the future. We need to give ourselves permission to take time...to be kind to ourselves. Bodywork can help tremendously to dissipate stress. Yoga, any physical movement can help even just walking.
After more time generally the grief starts to lift. Anniversaries you will always remember the person you have lost many many decades later. Sybil Francis BA MA PhD CLINICAL psychologist, resesrcher and professor of psychology for 20 plis years...ALSO widowed at age 32 with a 7 yr old child
I have CG from mama dying in 2008. My husband of 34 years has terminal cancer, and I have no idea how I'm going to cope with it when he's gone. Scares the crap outta me, so i try to stay in the now. I try to not project into the future w/o factoring God in it. I can't afford to think about it.
This is such an insight for me as a husband. My wife just lost her mother and just 3 years after her father. Both with without closure. I hear her choking up a little so you know she is giving information over her feelings to give help . God bless her!
Best wishes to you both.
Bless you.
I also have another UA-cam Channel, I just started:
Good Orderly Direction | Practical Bible Study
ua-cam.com/channels/YYJCD94NU3_qdbkSEyHLrg.html
Please consider liking and subscribing.
Jeffy your a good husvand to yoyr wife. Thank you for being understanding
U touched on so much for me. I have experienced all the above .. I lost my Beloved son, who was only 28, it was right before Christmas 2019 .... I don't really know how to be the new person I've become, because part of myself Died with him... Anger, Guilt, questioning WHY are part of my everyday thought processes ... The Pain is Unbearable at times ... 😢
I am THAT person who has no social support, No Family to check in on me, I have lost so called friends in this difficult time... I feel very alone and empty...in addition to losing my Son, I have lost 3 beloved animal babies as well, which is also Grief ....
Thanks for watching. Wishing you peace, health, and happiness.
Sorry for your loss...please stay strong...In July 2021, I've lost my father and youngest brother within 2 weeks due to covid. The pain and suffering are heart wrenching. I believe we are alive because God still wants us to live and change for a better person. "We can't control what come on our way, but we can make a choice on how to make out of it" Sadhguru
I feel for you dear. I Lost my first and only Grandbaby girl on the 10th of December 2021 due to SIDS. The pain is devastating 💔 😢. 😭😭😭. She was just 3months and 30 days old.
Sorry for your loss. I can relate. the why question never ends, it has no ending. You have to change the question / perspective. Without it you will be in a dark place needlessly. Instead of why.... Think of how grateful you were to have had that persons love in your life and you loved them. You could had worst kind of kid, but you had him. Aren't you thankful for that? To see smiles, laughs, to eat together. Then branch out to rest of your life and look for love and be thankful. For being born. For walking. For waking up. For being able to brush your teeth. Light the way with gratitude.
Thank you for this video, much appreciated!
Thumbs up! 1. Simple to follow w/o leaving us guessing what different terminologies mean 2. PowerPoint slides are amazing!!!! 3. No distracting music 4. Realistic examples 5. All of your videos are great. Thx!
Thank so much! and Thanks for watching.
Love this video, it’s so relevant to some of my ptsd clients, x soldiers and emergency services workers I work with and injuries workers I support and also people who have lost people in their lives. It’s great for helping people understanding the complexity of grief and loss.
Dear beautiful souls, sending love and light from my heart to yours ❤️🙏🙌💞😻🌈
Thank you so much for watching the video. What did you find most useful from it? Other videos you might be interested in can be found at ua-cam.com/users/DocSnipessearch?query=grief
I lost my grandpa in January of 2018, and my grandmother in july 2019 wasn't even done getting the help I needed for my grandpa's death before my long-term therapist retired. I shut down when my grandmother passed. Finally, after 2 and a half years after my grandmother's passing, I finally started feeling the anger and sadness of her death and am seeing a new therapist through my works mental health program. He recommended this video to me, and after a few weeks, I'm finally watching and listening to it. It's been a rough 5 years, and to be honest, nearly every day for the past 5 years, I haven't allowed myself to feel happy lately I've been allowing that tiny bit of old normalcy and I haven't thought or had a suicidal ideation in over 2 weeks. Just letting yourself feel happy or letting in more emotions instead of attempting to ignore them is a good first step in the recovery process.
I can't blame myself for their passing, I can only move forward one day at a time and look back on the good times.
I am sorry for your loss and I appreciate you watching the video. Here are more videos on grief that might help: ua-cam.com/users/DocSnipessearch?query=grief
I found these videos helpful . Im 48 and she was 40. I lost my significant other on may 10th 2022 in a single car rollover. Trama yeah im devastated my heart is broken. Tears almost everyday. I don't dont wake up without her i have all the symptoms described in video. This is the worst thing ever nothing else matters.
Sorry for your loss. Wishing you peace, health, and happiness.
God is soooo good! I was watching a video & had my Bluetooth in my ear...it ended & this came on...much muchhh needed!! Thank u
You’re so welcome. Thank you for watching the video. What did you find most helpful from it?
Four months ago, my husband of 30 years was diagnosed with metastatic melanoma on admission to hospital. We were in hospital for 7 weeks with his rapid decline. Took him home to die 3 days later. I am in shock, enormous pain, I don't feel alive. So confused and hurting. I wish I could feel God, I just don't understand.
I would welcome any prayers of hope.
Send prayers and our condolences. Wishing you peace, health, and happiness.
I lost my husband in November of 2020 to prostate cancer after 30 years of marriage. I don’t feel like I can move forward. My husband also found out about the severity of his cancer upon admittance to a hospital. He only had weeks to live and was sent home to hospice care. I was the only one to care for him other than a nurse that came by once a week. I was so busy that I didn’t have time to think or process any emotions. Some days the pain is unbearable and I don’t get out of bed. I miss him so much. I would love to tell you that it gets better with time but it hasn’t. I feel like I’m in the Twilight Zone. I thought that I would move through the stages of grief but they keep repeating. The world is going through a pandemic so if I express any emotions that I feel, my family pretty much makes me feel as though I’m being selfish because everyone has experienced a loss of someone or something due to the virus. I’m just tired and I just want my husband back. I would not be here if it wasn’t for my faith in God. I’m hanging on to that with what little strength that I have left. I pray for you and your family and I’m sorry for your loss. May God send You Peace, Love and Strength!!!
I lost my wife of 32 years 4 months ago. I know exactly what you mean. It´s so indescribably bad. You said "I wish I could feel God" - me too - but I´ve come to realise that the ideas many people have of God or reincarnation are just ideas....nothing more. They can give people some comfort or structure - but not if we don´t believe/feel them. I don´t, I can see it would be nice to....but I don´t. I pray for your peace. and for mine...... I don´t have to believe in an external God to pray. What I think I am realising now is that I have to cherish the good memories, give myself time to grieve, and also know that I have to plan for the future. mentally staying in the past and trying to make sense of something so senseless as a horrible death of such a beautiful person will only trap me into perpetual suffering.....it will never give me an answer. I have to accept that......and its tough. but has to be done. Maybe it´s like that for you too. One day at a time......one breath at a time. You must take care of you. I wish you peace.
@@domINkl thank you for your text here. As painful as our shared experience, your thoughts bring comfort and understanding. I welcome your insight, and wish for you peace as well.
@@truthseeker3773 I'm so sorry about your husband, my deepest condolence to you, trust me I completely understand how you feel, I lost my wife 3yrs ago to a horrible heart attack, it was a terrible experience for me but I kept strong for my little daughter hoping for the best future for her, time does heal the broken heart expecially when you're around the right people, I’d love to talk to you more and have nice conversation more privately if you don’t mind .?
I lost my mom 1 year ago. I was with her when she passed…it was NOT like in the movies, where the person breathes their last and just peacefully lets go. I won’t go into details here, but it was an awful thing to experience. On top of that, our relationship was very complicated - she was abusive when I was younger, then I became her caregiver the last 17 years of her life…13 with her in my home. Things were beginning to improve in our relationship the last couple of years…so there’s that added layer as well. Now I’m a year out and the trauma of her death experience is back in the forefront of my mind. Again I am second guessing every decision I made for her, including invoking her DNR. Not sure how to process this all
Thanks for watching.
You are a SAINT. I am sure your mom is thanking you for everything, including helping her work out difficult karma while still alive & embraced unconditionally. Heaven is going to so uplift & infuse you with joy this coming year! Have a divine, free, beautiful Christmastide.
thank you so much this has finally made things come to light for me and help me accept and understand what i've been going through.
Glad I could help
Wow, your videos show the value of staying with your plan. I have been watching for less than a year and there were maximum hundreds of views when I first viewed, I felt sorry, you had this very helpful insight and what felt like maybe a few of your private clients tuning in, now I see your views are through the roof, 100,000s. Well done staying with it!
You are SO kind for noticing. Much appreciated. Thanks for being with the channel!! 😁
You are helping me recognize grief and re-connect with my humanness and the fact that I am not a machine for other peoples needs. As a human, I have been grieving the loss of a father since my father left for Korea and "never came back". (The person who came back is a bad person and I have been his slave for his emotional needs.) Thank you kindly Doc Snipes. The human and the creative is beginning to emerge thanks to videos just like this one!!!
You’re so welcome, Kitty Kat! I am so sorry you experienced grief and at a young age. I humbly thank you for your kindness, for supporting the channel and for watching videos.
I lost my dad in February, I don’t think I will ever get over his death, my dad died a month and a day after his earth day. I am so sad, I have not stopped crying since he died, I wish I could see my dad - I’m having counselling twice (paid) but I don’t know how I will get over his death it was just so sudden.
I wish I could hug my dad one last time. 😢
My condolences. Thanks for watching. Wishing you peace, health, and happiness.
@@DocSnipes thank you
Your dad lives on through you.
@@samia6888 I gave my life over to Christ, whilst I do still think about my dad and I still cry. I have accepted my dad is in a better place and away from this evil world we live in.
Thank you for explaining the grieving process and how it works...differently for each person. Looking forward to more videos.
You’re so welcome. I appreciate you wanting the video and I am grateful to be of help
This was great!! Thank you for posting it.
You’re most welcome. Thanks for watching
Thank you for another great video! I use them a lot for my school, so helpful!
Wonderful. Thanks for sharing.🙂
When you talk about your Dad that made me feel so close because my father too had the cancer and I tended to him for 2 years even with my own bad health. I knew he would leave one day but I was not prepared for the day he finally did. I will never get over my parents passing and my younger brother. I guess I should not say never but at this present time that is what and how I feel. So glad I found your channel today. Blessings
My condolences on your losses. Thanks for watching. Wishing you peace, health, and happiness.
LOVE LOVE LOVE this channel TY TY 4 U 🙏 BLESSINGS BEYOND BLESSINGS Angels 🙌
TY
The content on your videos is always very detailed and informative. Thank you!!
So welcome. I appreciate you watching
Until I get my life back that was stolen, I will never be ok!
I understand how difficult it must be to feel like your life was stolen from you. It's natural to feel that way, but remember that recovery is possible, and you have the strength to rebuild. With support and determination, you can work towards reclaiming your life.
Dear beautiful souls. I just lost my little baby boy Saturday 3-26-22.
Please pray🙏 sending love and light from my heart to yours❤🙌🌈💜
My condolences on your loss. Wishing you peace, health, and happiness.
Prayers 🙏🙏🙏🙏
I also lost my child .
Can understand your pain
@@lyjuslyjus2201 dear beautiful soul, sending love and light from my heart to yours ❤️🙌🙏💞😻
Thank You So very very much x
You’re so welcome. I appreciate you watching!Other videos you might be interested in can be found at: ua-cam.com/users/DocSnipessearch?query=CPTSD
Sorry to you🕯
This has been so insightful, my boyfriend/ex-boyfriend seem to fit the bill to a tea. I've been educating myself on Neurology and trauma related issues through your videos, I am so grateful for you, I truly am✌🏽❤❤❤
Glad you are here!
Thanks for watching. Wishing you peace, health, and happiness.
Wow I do not know how I found this page but sure glad I did. When you speak of losing both parents and then a younger brother all within a short time sure leaves one at a loss for even words sometimes. The mind goes numb at times. I miss my family. Especially my mom and dad. :(
Thanks for sharing!
You have no idea how much of a face of reality that I just had listening to this. Thank you for this. By any chance do you therapy sessions covered by insurance that isn’t PPO?
Wow, I'm really impressed by the value of this channel.
TY!
Thank you for the great presentation. My uncle murdered my aunt and then killed himself. Such a hard thing to process. Seeing your timelines for grief seems to be spot on as it took me about three years for my mothers normal death. Seeing the timeline for complicated grief makes my gut sink as I am only two months after this tragedy. So many of the details of your slides apply to my feelings and I certainly don’t feel like the same person I was prior.
My condolences on your loss. I can't imagine how devastating that must be.
I am glad you found this video. Wishing you peace, health, and happiness.
I’m so grateful I found this podcast what a blessing
I am happy you find it helpful. Thanks for watching!
@@DocSnipes
IMO mom o
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I’m my
Momok kom
I’m
Mom MLK ooo
This podcast helped me greatly with a family members loss thank you very informative thank you
Grief has been so very difficult I have struggled with it since 2014 when my partner died it was very very hard within 3_5 yrs I lost my 2 nans it was very traumatic 3 close friends very very hard for me but I have just recently started to heal and recover thank you for your video much appreciated!
Thanks for watching. Wishing you peace, health, and happiness.
I'm so sorry about your loss, my deepest condolence to you, trust me I completely understand how you feel, I lost my wife 3yrs ago to a horrible heart attack, it was a terrible experience for me but I kept strong for my little daughter hoping for the best future for her, time does heal the broken heart expecially when you're around the right people, I’d love to talk to you more and have nice conversation more privately if you don’t mind .?
I HAD to share this with my peeps on Facebook..I HOPE it's ok...at least 6 friends and neighbors have died from fentanyl over the past two years...I appreciate your presenting this great info. I love my hometown and the folks I grew up with...I had to share it...I've got to say a lot of this resonated deeply with me. Thank you
Thank you for sharing the video. My mission is to provide access to free mental health tools that anyone can access so please feel free to share any videos you find helpful.
😳@07:00 OMG, Doc! You have just described where "I've been existing" going on 2 years now. I have never experienced such helplessness and homelessness. I am static frozen? You know when you drive all the way home from work and there you are, in park in ypur driveway. You creepishly take a deep breath & realize the danger you escaped. Feels almost like out of body? Laterally, dissociate several times daily. Out of all the F responses, my body takes up frozen? I'm still inside the meat suit, just not sure how break free? Thanks to you're amazing teaching videos - I have GOT to rise! Thank you, Doc. Sincerely, Roberts housewife 😟
Emotionally num for 67 years now no more frozen but now needed you and my therpy right now now I have to face up without frozen
Very helpful information for my Flourishing Life Coaching program
Glad it was helpful. Thanks for watching
How about Complex Grief?
Chunking all Grieving together. Sibling, nephew, Climate Issues, World in Crisis, recently resolved childhood memories. What is the equivalent of CPTSD in losses. (You just mentioned cptsd!) Emotionally numb...makes me feel incompetent...and depressed. Will it end?
Grieving, not deep depression; this video is Very Helpful. Thank you.
I so wish I had researched grief after losing my husband. I had horrible support and now grieving my entire life. I made a horrible decision while grieving due to bad side effects of Lexapro. I lost everything because of it. My doctor said most widows take antidepressants and I should not have because I had no support..
Sorry for your loss. I am glad the educational video may help you a bit.
i believe most doctors have never taken anti-depressants in any form!! i know its been 3 years, buy my condolences. How are things doing for you nowdays?
This was so great and well put together. As a somewhat new therapist I appreciate the foundation this offers for an issue that can be overwhelming to figure out where to start. I really found the attachment and serotonin interesting and the models of approach to help me help a client navigate grief. THANK YOU!!!
Thanks
Thank you so much for sharing your wisdom. How is this different from ambiguous grief? For example when a parent has been alienated from their child that once loved them but child has been brainwashed to the point that the child vehemently attacks said parent and is unsafe for both child and alienated parent.
Sorry, but I knew all this anyway and it doesn't help me in the least. I have had prolonged grief for over thirteen years. I understand all this stuff on an intellectual level, but I can't choose to move on.
I lost my mum when I was 8 im now 28. Life feels empty, I have no role model, no one to show me or support me. I'm trying to mend my heart, but it always feels like I'm doomed.
I am deeply sorry about your loss and I appreciate you watching the video
I'm so sorry, Salema. I send you love and hugs.❤
13:53 Ouch.... I didn't think of it that way until now.😢
Thank you for watching the video
Wow…so I’ve basically been grieving for years 😢 I literally have felt so drained, like no life force to do anything…now I understand why
I am sorry about that and I am grateful for you being here and watching the video. What tips will you use to address grief?
Also, other videos you might be interested in can be found at ua-cam.com/users/DocSnipessearch?query=grief
And I am grieving the loss of a vacation I was looking forward to because of fears of dealing with airports and or planes will trigger another anxiety and or anger attack like the one I had yesterday when I had to deal with an incident at the apartment complex I live in that almost put me into the emergency room ..
I am sorry about that. What tips from the video will you use to cope with not going on vacation?
23 minutes through this and I'm miserable. Maybe that's the point, but I was really hoping for some encouragement and action steps !! Kind of wary about spending another hour of grief triggering or can I expect some coping skills. Speaker definitely has the triggering stuff down pat, how about something encouraging along the way so I can get through the next hour of this client sales pitch
I don't really see private clients much now, I am too busy with AllCEUs and making videos for this channel. This channel helps thousands of people. (Certainly not trying to make people miserable.) It sounds like you may benefit from working with a professional, licensed, local counselor.
@@DocSnipes actually Ive been listening and learning from your videos for 2 weeks now, and occasionally, falling asleep to them intentionally to learn further during my sleep stage. So candidly I do trust your thoughts and guidance. But I guess this complex grief video was too complex for me in my conscious state. I listened to it twice just before sleeping thus week, but of course consciously, seemingly, missed everything...so I was determined to "hear" everything this morning but I guess I got too triggered and began life reviews as I followed along. That was unbridled. I'm sure that your ideations are worthwhile and I Apologize for more poor choice of comment messaging. Have a pleasant week, Dr.
Most Sincerely craig
This is great information. There is one type of complicated grief that one has when their adult son has been estranged for a year and a half, along with my grandchild. It is almost unbearable. My mom just died and I don’t have her support re my estranged son. I don’t know how to deal with this much grief.
I am sorry for your loss and I am sorry your adult son had been estranged for a year and a half.
I have this, I lost my son 2 weeks after his birthday and then 3 months 3 days later my husband fell dead in front of me and now I’m being kicked out of my home of 18 yrs by my gpa that’s mad because I’m disabled and can’t drive him everywhere. I won’t be “here” much longer.
Please look to God sweetheart..I understand exactly what your going through..I lost my only son 2 1/2 months ago and the grief and depression are almost unbearable..If not for God I probably wouldn't be here..most days I feel like I don't wanna be here anymore..and then I think about the 2 daughters I have and my grandkids that I know love and need me..it's just hard to focus on what I still have because all I think about is the son I don't have anymore..we're all hurting and grieving..I'll be praying for God to bring comfort and help to you and everyone else in our situation 🙏
Thank you so much for this wonderful and helpful video. I am dealing with my favorite therapist moving. I have 2 sessions left with her. I am devastated. What coping would you suggest for the pain? I have also lost both of my very abusive parents 3 years ago as well.
I am sorry about that and I appreciate you watching the video. Maybe you can talk to her about continuing sessions online
@@DocSnipes thank you so much. Sadly she is leaving the practice and will be working at a different area. I was referred to a new therapist but still grieving the loss of my 1st therapist.
I’m a adult but I just want my mommy back 😢😢
We all need our mothers, no matter our age. I appreciate you watching the video. What tips will you use to address complicated grief? Other videos you might be interested in can be found at ua-cam.com/users/DocSnipessearch?query=grief
I’m 48 and I just want my mommy too. She died in February this year and the world just looks wrong without her in it. This is the longest I have ever gone in my whole life without talking with her. She was my mom and best friend. When I was little I had a hard time being separated from her for sleepovers because I would be overcome with panic that she might die somehow. There is a part of me that is still 5 and feels like my worst nightmare has come true.
My partner's mother passed 6 months ago and she's feeling so much guilt, now she has pushed me away and will not speak to me, so now I'm grieving because I feel helpless to help her.
I have never experienced any emotional support for anything my entire life. Therefore I have lived 29.5/41 years in solitude and celibate. Isolation and loneliness has been the baseline experience for me.
Optimism is a choice...
Love is generated internally...
Nothingness exists externally...
Society has nothing to offer me that I want or need...
Hope for a better tomorrow was lost decades ago...
I will exist until I don't, may I never experience the material plane again...
This is the perception of my total life experience...
Hypersensitive (Fe)&(Se) INFJ-T Indigo + Genetic Primary Psychopath that had no chance at living a fulfilling life...
Yet I still exist until I don't. Patiently awaiting my final moment...
Then I will go back to where I belong
Enjoy your journey
Thanks for watching.
I lost my young cat, i had to give him away, he was ragdoll beautiful and i miss him so badly i can't stop crying and then i had implant tooth, could'nt eat, pain then yesterday i had sore throat, no energy, i have been depressed, tried to get cat back, can't stop thinking about him, he was great company and a good little guy and i feel guilty, i want him back, i even think about getti g another one who wont need to go outside, this is the problem, no garden, but a big park but dogs everywhere! I have cpstd as well, I am taking too many pills to sleep and stimulant through day and ta,ing extra to overcome lethargy!
I am deeply sorry for your loss. Here is the video on pet loss: ua-cam.com/video/Si1WVGRpsIo/v-deo.htmlsi=A9C_sAZY0gpGyseJ
Sometimes it is right in your face especially when adult children live with their parents and dad died at home mom died in hospice at the hospital that is just example of how it went with me and brothers losing our parents mom passed in November of 2018 and Dad passed June 20th 2023 and me and my brothers would go in their bedroom and lay down across the bed and we would just talk we continued the routine of going into the bedroom and laying down across the bed to talk to dad now we are learning to deal with being by ourselves
I am so sorry about your losses and I appreciate you watching the video. Other videos you might be interested in can be found at ua-cam.com/users/DocSnipessearch?query=grief
What if you've been through all of it. Lost parents, 3 homes, child, husband, 17 year old dog, reinventing myself twice? I was emotionally numb until now. Now, I'm starting to feel extreme pain. So emotions are on and then off.
I am sorry for your losses
Is it possible that other things, besides a death, cause complicated grief? Thank you for sharing.
Absolutely!!!
I think the biggest theme around this issue is loss of identification. So in what ways do humans find themselves identifying what makes them who they are or their purpose? Loss of job or career, divorce or a break-up, losing a home (fire, foreclosure, eviction), an illness, diagnoses or terminal disease...etc. Death is definitely going to cause grief. I see Complicated grief as an incident other than death that causes a person to grieve. Most people understand the grieving period of a death, many do not understand how someone can still be grieving a year later after losing a job & hasn't "snapped" out of it yet.
I left my abusive alcoholic husband two years ago & legally divorced for 10 months. I am still grieving & adjusting. I am still sad, angry & having a hard time forgiving myself. Even though I know I had no other choice & he was abusive, it is still a loss. I understand that now. I identified immensely as a wife, mother & through our family. It was a huge change. I felt like I lost my right arm. Some people just attach to people, job titles, a home... so deeply. When they lose said thing they literally lose a chunk of their soul & it takes months if not years to come to terms with what happened. There is so much denial, cognitive dissonance & heartbreak to muddle through. The biggest help for me was educating myself about what I was emotionally & mentally going through. That there was actual terms & definitions that I didn't have the words for to even express what I was dealing with in my marriage & during the aftermath. Therapy, of course was a big 2nd! Helping me process my thoughts & feelings, plus the validation that I was dealing with narcissistic abuse syndrome, that I Definitely was a Domestic Abuse Survivor & that it was ok to grieve my marriage, my ex-husband & my broken family even though it was a toxic situation relationship. Blessings & healing to everyone out there going through this right now.
I lost my husband of 37 years suddenly on 03/06/22. We moved to AZ to enjoy our retirement and chose our home carefully. I can’t stay in it though so am searching for a condo on the first floor. I forgot to factor in the remaining mortgage in my figures. I’ve lost 75% of his pension and a bit of his/our Social Security benefits. Yes, I’m grieving! Not for the loss of money but for the loss of hm!
He was a tall , handsome, man who never had a sick day in all the years I knew him! It’s just awful.
I feel so lost. My beautiful daughter died suddenly. I'm exhausted all the time my body hurts I can't even hardly get out of bed. I'm so sick all the time. I've been to the doctor, I've had a few test but nothing so far.
Sorry to hear. Wishing you peace, health, and, happiness.
I've been heartbroken after my fathers death and became immensely addicted to opiates afterwards for years. I'm on suboxone now but I still have a hard time moving forward. My dad died, i moved, my 17 year pet died and I was promoted at work all within the same month, plus a cpl other things. It was too much for me. Is there life after death? Thank you.
I'm very sure that there is life after death. I have lost my 24 year old daughter in an accident two months ago and I'm sure she wants me to be happy, I'm sure she is sending me little signs and accompanies me on my way. I'm sure it was her who sent me my new little dog from a rescue. I feel much better for it. I'm sure we will have a lotto talk to each other when we meet again. I don't have to forget her and she is part of my life. She is always there with me. In a way I have managed to feel immense gratitude for the times we had together but it will still take time for me to be 'normal' and to be interested in everything that is going on around me. But time takes time, and if you don't feel up to take your promotion just now, people will understand. I wish youall the best. Maybe you can talk to people who have experienced something similar, they can understand you. Take care.
I am very sorry to hear about your back to back tragedies. I can only imagine how exhausted you are dealing with all of that still.
A soul never dies. It's only the physical body gone. The soul is still around and sometimes they visit us. For sure you'll be reunited with your loved ones when your time has come. It's only a matter of time for us on earth now while in the afterlife there's no concept of time. Hang in there....
Yes. There is life after death. I know the Lord God. I want to encourage you to seek Jesus christ. He comforts, sees you, loves you, and wants a relationship with you. Jesus Loves you. God bless you my friend. Seek him.
I’m 100% sure there is life after death. Actually there is no death. Only the meat suit we are in dies and then your spirit kicks it off like a worn out pair of jeans. Then our spirit enters a place of perfection and unconditional love. I’m looking forward to that better world but I still have work to do here. God bless
I lost My Dad May 11, 2003 and still haven’t grieved
I am sorry for your loss and I appreciate you watching the video
What are symptoms of unprocessed grief? I'm 65, attend Al-Anon due to addicted parents in childhood. I lost my brother when he was 23 and I was 24, several marriages, 2 husbands died. The natural loss of grandparents and parents. My dad was only 50. How can I know if unprocessed grief is an obstacle to my personal development?
I've lost a beautiful daughter and gent of a son yr half apart a few yrs ago I'm finished I'm done I will never feel any dif my complication is some days I cry more for Joe then I feel guilty about Claire then vice verser cruel cruel world
@@brendadrumm9708 I hope you'll find your way to Al-Anon meetings, Celebrate Recovery is exactly the same except from a Christian perspective. You can find a group to help you recover from grief
I feel your pain there is no light at the end of the tunnel for me I am just surrounded by darkness I lost my beautiful daughter so I can’t even imagine the pain you are going through losing to of your children I’m so sorry for your pain no words
I lost my mom a year ago on 24th Dec. due to cancer.
I can't imagine my life without her. She was the whole oackage of ebtertainment and laughter for me she was also a great healer for me. The whole drastic change that come in my life has shook me up completely. I don't feel like myself anymorem i was already going through some mental issues and was fucjed up with my life before my mom died now I'm dealing wuth a major trauma . Sometimes I think I should just die. Also I'm dealing with delayed grief. I'm not able to find a new perspective in life.
Only child day.
Single person day.
Those that have no family day
I HAVE HAD HAD GRIEF BEING IN SPECIAL EDUCATION WITH A LEARNING DISABILITY.
I am sorry about that
2nd year was harder than 1st year. My mom was all I had. Now I have no family.
My condolences. Wishing you peace, health, and happiness.
🙏🕊💔
This is hard. I'm so sorry😢❤
I'd love to see something on grieving mentally ill, abusive or parents or family we're estranged from. Also stuff on emotional incest.
There are many videos on the channel that your would find helpful. Just search UA-cam for DocSnipes and the keyword(s) you are interested in.
THANK YOU SO SO SO MUCH XOXO,*(** DR.SNIPES **)
FOR THESE EDUCATIONAL VIDEOS....😎🙂😍🤗😍🙏😇🙏
You’re so welcome. I appreciate you watching the video.
Other videos you might be interested in can be found at ua-cam.com/users/DocSnipessearch?query=grief
I loosed my wife and most of these symptoms I deal with
Thanks for watching. Wishing you peace, health, and happiness.
I HAVE HAD GRIEF BEING IN SPECIAL EDUCATION BECAUSE OF A LEARNING DISABILITY.
I am sorry about that.
My girlfriend loss her son so I'm giving her space we are in a long distance relationship Im concerned for her and she may or hopefully her cancer is gone going through this tough time
Thanks for watching. Wishing you both peace, health, and happiness.
My love went to light the pilot light, the house blew up, I found him naked, on fire on his hands and knees by the back door. I put him out helped him away from the house. Laid him down behind the shop called 911. He had no skin, eyes, ears and asked me to pour water on him but there was none. They flew him to the city but he died 6 hours later. I lost the love of my life. I lost my home. I lost pictures of my babies, lost my cat, lost everything. Got an answer? Why am I even looking for answers.
So sorry for your loss.
Holy crap I am so sorry Camille L
Praying hard for you 🙏🙏🙏
I'm stuck at the why. I lost my son , he was 19. Today u had a trigger... His death was sudden and I still don't know who killed him or why
My condolences on your lose. Wishing you peace, health, and happiness.
I am so sorry for your loss. That is heartbreaking 💔 I Pray you find closure and remember he is still with you and your love for him keeps his memory alive!
May God be your comfort 🙏
So sorry for your loss ❤
My condolences. I hope you can work to shift away from why, its never ending.
I like your information. I wonder if you can get a microphone so that it doesn’t sound like you are yelling. I have a hard time with hearing certain voices. I like lower register and softer. Also if it’s rapid fire info I can’t process it. Slower and lower please?
The newer videos are on a different mic. You can watch those and see if you like it better.
I still can’t do my taxes, I lost my dog 2 months ago and I still cannot think straight
Whether we live or we die, we are the Lords.
I die daily.
Jesus said: be thou faithful unto death and I shall give thee the crown of life.
Do not fear. I will never leave you or forsake you
Whether we live or we die, we do it unto the Lord.
True born again Christians never die, they just change addresses.
Thanks for watching.
💖
can you have complicated grief but not it be the cause of a death but the loss from just overall abuse and trauma ?
Yes, the loss of overall abuse and trauma it is possible to lead to complicated grief. Complicated grief is a condition that can occur when an individual has a difficult time recovering from a loss and returning to their normal life. This type of grief can be triggered by various types of loss.
Other videos you might be interested in can be found at ua-cam.com/users/DocSnipessearch?query=grief
@@DocSnipes do you mind trying to send the link again? it sent me to your main page