Growing up with gay parents! (my experience)

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  • Опубліковано 10 лют 2025
  • My Adoption Story. Episode 1.
    I was adopted from China by my gay / queer parents and grew up in New York City. This video/vlog is about going to school for the first time and having to introduce myself.
    Follow me on Instagram if you’d like to:
    @becomingben
    / becomingben
    For brands/inquiries: becomingben@smoothmedia.co
    Watch EPISODE 2: My Dads' First Date!
    • My Gay Parents UNEXPEC...
    #Chineseadoption #Adoptee #Adoption #realmodernfamily, #nationaladoptionmonth, @bebensmith
    --
    Related video topics: my adoption story, gay parents, adoption awareness month, national adoption day, chinese adoption, transracial adoption, international adoption, lgbtq adoption. #adoption #adoptionawareness #adoptionstory #gayparents #lgbtqfamily

КОМЕНТАРІ • 2,8 тис.

  • @BecomingBenSmith
    @BecomingBenSmith  3 місяці тому +2217

    WOWWW yall, this popped off!! thank you so much 🥹🥹 I’m more active on instagram now @becomingben if you want to follow and watch my newer videos there! y’all are the best❤❤ edit: maybe I'll do an AMA on my IG stories??

    • @Carly_Ackerman
      @Carly_Ackerman 3 місяці тому +18

      This is so cool! It made me so happy to hear your story!!

    • @Insane_enasnI
      @Insane_enasnI 3 місяці тому +1

      Ok.

    • @Dvmor_
      @Dvmor_ 3 місяці тому +9

      @@BecomingBenSmith I’m glad this is getting attention now because it’s a really neat story and I love hearing about other people’s experiences!!

    • @RebecaGarces-mb4yn
      @RebecaGarces-mb4yn 3 місяці тому +3

      You have violated God's Law that He wrote in your heart; your own conscience condemns you. Therefore, you deserve 'the fine'-the punishment of hell. But God is good, gracious, and kind. He desires to show you mercy! For this reason, Jesus Christ (God in the flesh) died on the cross. The Law was violated, but Christ paid the fine. He suffered in exchange, as the Substitute; and He rose on the third day. Repent and place all your faith in the Person and work of Jesus Christ, and you will be saved from the wrath of God.

    • @selearbol
      @selearbol 3 місяці тому +8

      ​@@RebecaGarces-mb4yn Amen sister 🙏 but remember to also respect their choice bc God gave us free will. if they think that they dont want to change bc thats who they are, then dont force them, okay? luv ya ❤

  • @BlackOpal888
    @BlackOpal888 4 місяці тому +5077

    WHY ARE WE ALL GETTING RECOMMEND THIS 4YRS LATER😭💜 BRUHHH I would have watched this 4yrs ago🥲

  • @SMAnthonyW
    @SMAnthonyW 4 місяці тому +6530

    This is proof that multicultural, queer families CAN raise well-adjusted, bright, intelligent children. It takes a village to raise children, and it doesn't matter who. As long as they are kind people.

    • @shawnbay2211
      @shawnbay2211 4 місяці тому +257

      Also separated parents! I think we take 4 granted the collective efforts & wider family in child raising. I feel there is so much love in this family that raising good children was inevitable regardless of familial structure.

    • @Pedro-ul1gr
      @Pedro-ul1gr 3 місяці тому +41

      They are not multicultural, the kid was raised in USA, not China

    • @boubacarsylla563
      @boubacarsylla563 3 місяці тому +28

      This is sick

    • @miaruuu8375
      @miaruuu8375 3 місяці тому +124

      ​@@boubacarsylla563
      It's so wholesome. I can't blame you if you think it's cool

    • @miaruuu8375
      @miaruuu8375 3 місяці тому +80

      ​@@Pedro-ul1gr
      isn't the US a melting pot though lol, hence it being multicultural

  • @BURNINTHEDEEPESTPITOFHELL
    @BURNINTHEDEEPESTPITOFHELL 4 місяці тому +8461

    WHY IS THIS RECCOMENDED TO ME 4 YEARS LATER THIS IS A MASTERPEICE
    Edit: im famous

    • @Villaincatlover
      @Villaincatlover 4 місяці тому +137

      SAME

    • @TheWeirdTeenager2010
      @TheWeirdTeenager2010 4 місяці тому +87

      no cause literally

    • @G4too-0
      @G4too-0 4 місяці тому +189

      UA-cam IS VERY STRANGE WITH RECOMMENDATIONS TODAY 💀 yesterday youtube recommended me a video from 5 years ago where a UA-camr was saying goodbye to her fans because her depression got the better of her and she committed su1c1d3 😢 (I don't want to disrespect anyone btw I was just mentioning it, I hope you don't get offended❤)

    • @SundayLover2.0
      @SundayLover2.0 4 місяці тому +25

      REAL 😭😭😭

    • @Doc1855
      @Doc1855 4 місяці тому

      @@BURNINTHEDEEPESTPITOFHELL Once it’s on the internet, it’s always on the internet.
      I briefly started getting stuff from The Love Connection TV show that came out Before the internet.
      Heck, I get texts from people on something I posted several years ago and they’re seeing it as if I just posted it.

  • @addeenen7684
    @addeenen7684 4 місяці тому +5691

    I would like to have been adopted by two gay men. In 1973, at age 11, I was placed in a home for child abuse because of my homosexuality. The result was violence by 365 boys, approximately 365 days a year. Some of the few gay kids broke down. I went into silence mode. I wish I had a dad and father instead back then.

    • @A.H._
      @A.H._ 4 місяці тому +409

      i’m so sorry you went through all of that. hope you’re doing well

    • @Hooperjz78
      @Hooperjz78 4 місяці тому +258

      😢 I'm so sorry. No child should have to experience that. I hope your life is infinitely better now ❤

    • @GloryAllison
      @GloryAllison 4 місяці тому +42

      What so ever Lane we walk through in life either narrow or wild we just have to learn to be strong.

    • @Mike-or2cv
      @Mike-or2cv 4 місяці тому +35

      I'm so sorry for that... ☹☹

    • @vibhorprasharmua2972
      @vibhorprasharmua2972 4 місяці тому +37

      hope you are okay

  • @wagnalangpala
    @wagnalangpala 4 місяці тому +3070

    As a bi man that once believed I couldn't start a family if I married a man. You give me hope.

    • @irjectjade
      @irjectjade 3 місяці тому +71

      good luck .

    • @Mixocoree
      @Mixocoree 3 місяці тому

      You’re skibidi toilet

    • @DuneClaw-vk8kz
      @DuneClaw-vk8kz 3 місяці тому +7

      I’m a gecko

    • @justasillygirl_inasillyworld
      @justasillygirl_inasillyworld 3 місяці тому +21

      it depends on your kid's gender girls need a mother and boys need a father thats not just a problem with gay marriage also a problem with single parenting....

    • @djcoolbeat6934
      @djcoolbeat6934 3 місяці тому +152

      @@justasillygirl_inasillyworld🙄

  • @stonew1927
    @stonew1927 4 місяці тому +2529

    Until recently I've been working as a substitute teacher. Towards the end of the last year I was in a first grade class, and one of the little boys came up to me and told me that he had two moms. I responded by telling him how cool that was and that he was very lucky and special to have two moms. I was amazed by his courage to be so open, but now that I think about it, he wasn't being courageous at all. It was simply all he knew. It was normal for him.

    • @TUNDRAHOMBRE
      @TUNDRAHOMBRE 4 місяці тому +194

      Hopefully in the future it can get normalized to a point like this for society. That people won’t NEED to be courageous to speak about their queer connections…

    • @grigoryopta
      @grigoryopta 3 місяці тому +16

      Remember, kids: if you don't have a mom, someone has two of them

    • @Elyakins
      @Elyakins 3 місяці тому +16

      Kinda vaguely related but I was raised by my grandmother, mother, and aunt. I had no idea it was not normal until 1st grade. Like 95% of other kids were at the orientation with their mom and DAD. I was shocked lol

    • @stonew1927
      @stonew1927 3 місяці тому +1

      @@Elyakins Funny. Thanks for sharing . . .

    • @stonew1927
      @stonew1927 3 місяці тому +1

      @@TUNDRAHOMBRE Exactly!

  • @lizzfrmhon
    @lizzfrmhon 4 місяці тому +4906

    Love is love. As long as a child is protected, nurtured and loved, it doesn’t matter what gender the parents are. Your dads seem like great people. You’re fortunate.

    • @Doc1855
      @Doc1855 4 місяці тому +1

      @@lizzfrmhon some love is an abomination

    • @asillygoofygoober
      @asillygoofygoober 4 місяці тому +420

      Real. Two dads or two moms are better than none or abusive ones.

    • @jordandthornburg
      @jordandthornburg 4 місяці тому +23

      What about all the kids who were raised by gay parents who say it DOES matter?

    • @enderteck3273
      @enderteck3273 4 місяці тому +2

      ​@@jordandthornburgThey would have been raised by no one if they weren't adopted, your argument is stupid.

    • @Gayonetta5000
      @Gayonetta5000 4 місяці тому +229

      @@jordandthornburgif it comes from a place of bigotry, their opinion is irrelevant. If they truly believe they would have been better out with no parents than gay parents, they’re delusional.

  • @nick554
    @nick554 3 роки тому +2710

    Im a young gay guy, when I catch myself thinking about having kids, I find myself asking how they'd think and feel about having two dads. It's a big world out there, alot of people and different thinking. You, your dads, and how you were and what you are now... is just amazing to think about. Thank you.

    • @sebastianlaz137
      @sebastianlaz137 4 місяці тому +157

      This is me currently, I would hate to make my kids experience discrimination just because they have 2 dads, it just really bugs me

    • @cluckcluckchicken
      @cluckcluckchicken 4 місяці тому +94

      @@sebastianlaz137 If my interracial parents were worried about the discrimination I'd face, I wouldn't even exist!!

    • @mariaastin
      @mariaastin 4 місяці тому +63

      @@sebastianlaz137 Maybe the solution normalizing the fact that you can have 2 dads or 2 moms and be a perfect functional family as any other family.
      Having 1 mom and 1 dad doesn't mean you will have necessarily a good childhood either. I think most kids get some kind of discrimination or insults for whatever they are different, if kids wants to laugh at you and isolate you, they will find a reason to do so no matter how your family is.

    • @sebastianlaz137
      @sebastianlaz137 4 місяці тому +42

      @@mariaastin This is really solid, I'm from a very very very homophobic country (Nigeria) where staying in the closet just seems like common sense, people always find a way to discriminate if something strays outside "societal norms", or any thing that's foreign to them, you can't really blame them tho considering it's how they were brought up

    • @mariaastin
      @mariaastin 4 місяці тому +9

      @@sebastianlaz137 yeah well, it's true that it depends on the context, on the social norms. But I think it's interesting to have an open mind and normalize things that are not really a problem, like they are not as bad as conservative people believe, and be more emphatic and respectful to others.
      But well, if you see that it's like impossible to tackle the problem, you may consider not to have children at least, not surrounded by this particular society.

  • @Roxasora123
    @Roxasora123 4 місяці тому +1886

    What makes it more amazing is that your parents filmed everything when you were kids. They really really love you so much. So much more than average straight parents to their kids.

    • @adventurerke
      @adventurerke 4 місяці тому +230

      ikr. this was the era where there was no phone camera. it's crazy amount of footage for that time. my family had no videos AT ALL back then bcs we couldn't afford it. he was so loved, i hope he knows that

    • @ilhamilham1167
      @ilhamilham1167 4 місяці тому +63

      I got nothing from my childhood I envy this guy

    • @______________url
      @______________url 3 місяці тому +30

      Could’ve said this without the generalization but ok

    • @briclare
      @briclare 3 місяці тому +12

      right? i’m astonished at how much vids from him as a kid he has! lucky

    • @Spamhard
      @Spamhard 3 місяці тому +27

      I mean, this video was great. But the parents filming him is less about love and more about the priviledge of money. Poor families who couldn't afford a camera back then don't love their kids any less. It's a weird correlation to make.

  • @KhanhTheLearner
    @KhanhTheLearner 4 місяці тому +558

    The biggest problem with having 2 dads is the sheer amount of dad jokes one has to endure their entire life.

    • @ThirdKindredCuriambro
      @ThirdKindredCuriambro 4 місяці тому +58

      Hey, atleast no mom jokes

    • @XDeathwingSilenceX
      @XDeathwingSilenceX 3 місяці тому +7

      😂😂😂😂

    • @leaf3lf57
      @leaf3lf57 3 місяці тому +81

      "You have no dad"
      "Jokes on you i have twice as many dads as you"

    • @MrBrezelwurst
      @MrBrezelwurst 3 місяці тому +35

      Well, if you have two moms, you'll get double the amount of 'yo momma' jokes thrown at you 😅😂

    • @bent_spoon
      @bent_spoon 3 місяці тому +50

      fatherless behavior? no, no, no: *father² behavior*

  • @lukas_elpatron3000
    @lukas_elpatron3000 4 місяці тому +3243

    I have two Moms and I love you very much, I am not adopted, my biological mother and my father separated when I was 6 years old because he hit us often and my mother began go to psychology with me and there she met Camila who is now my second mother. I am not ashamed of them at all and I feel happy with them ❤️

  • @枒
    @枒 3 місяці тому +401

    In 2008, I was in kindergarten. One kid told us they had two moms, which for some reason the rest of the class saw as a flex. Another kid went “oh yeah? Well I have THREE moms” and I claimed to have eight moms.

    • @TomStark-se6lw
      @TomStark-se6lw 3 місяці тому +52

      Lmao 🤣🤣🤣🤣, that's cutely hilarious.

    • @pinchebruha405
      @pinchebruha405 2 місяці тому +4

      😂😂😂😂😂😂❤🎉

    • @victoriaharti7631
      @victoriaharti7631 2 місяці тому +3

      😂😂😂😂

    • @EricaG23
      @EricaG23 Місяць тому +3

      😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

    • @XiaoHei324
      @XiaoHei324 Місяць тому +1

      😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

  • @ktostam35
    @ktostam35 4 місяці тому +1208

    Whenever I see people say "Children deserve a mom and a dad" my mind immediately goes "but what if gay dads or lesbian moms can provide a stable parent like figure of the opposite gender, like a family friend or uncle/aunt?"
    And by seeing how happy you were and are, their argument kinda... Drops. Tho many children long for a parent of a different gender, it doesn't mean all will.

    • @Minipsil
      @Minipsil 4 місяці тому +97

      Even if you have a male and female parent it still doesn't necessarily work because there would always be at least some children longing for 1 parent, or 2 of the same gender. Personally I'd probably like 2 mothers if I was to choose what I think I'd like most.

    • @jemstone-l1x
      @jemstone-l1x 4 місяці тому +126

      Those people seriously need to get a grip and realize children should be treated as individuals and not "well mommy and daddy setup work for MY little one, so obviously I know better for every other child everywhere out there in the world" 🤧

    • @Shishui-cc8hv
      @Shishui-cc8hv 4 місяці тому +37

      As someone with two moms I was shocked when I saw how many people want two moms .

    • @mariatrinitymya8618
      @mariatrinitymya8618 4 місяці тому +39

      OMG. I ama lesbian and I am thinking about having a wife and children in the future but I know the probability is so low. But still, I really want to be a mother and I know that my children would need a male figure so I would make sure they got male figures. And I think people don't look at only one parent as a model. I think all children look at both of their parents as their role models.

    • @ktostam35
      @ktostam35 4 місяці тому +11

      @@mariatrinitymya8618
      Exactly! Also hope you'll be a great mom

  • @arsonzartz
    @arsonzartz 3 місяці тому +478

    why are children the most innocent and understanding beings ive seen-

    • @OllieOxyn
      @OllieOxyn 3 місяці тому +59

      Cuz they haven't been taught to hate yet

    • @bkwhpo
      @bkwhpo 3 місяці тому +2

      @@OllieOxyncome on, they hate things too.

    • @bkwhpo
      @bkwhpo 3 місяці тому

      @@OllieOxyncome on, they hate things too.

    • @prettytopia
      @prettytopia 3 місяці тому +27

      ​@@bkwhpoyes, logical things, like dog bites and bitter stuff and mean teachers. When a kid starts hating people for being, it's definitely taught.

    • @sm25-y5w
      @sm25-y5w 3 місяці тому +4

      ​@@bkwhpowhy ping the person thrice

  • @yuchen3897
    @yuchen3897 4 місяці тому +1150

    your dads both are sooo HANDSOME!!
    and YOU TOO! :D

    • @Stempy-channel
      @Stempy-channel 4 місяці тому +62

      Mhm! It must have been passed on from both of them! 😊

    • @713majesty
      @713majesty 4 місяці тому +59

      Facts. Beautiful family all around

    • @713majesty
      @713majesty 4 місяці тому +33

      @@Stempy-channel😭

    • @Goofy_Editor
      @Goofy_Editor 3 місяці тому

      ​@@Stempy-channelVile

    • @ItzTeaSipper
      @ItzTeaSipper 3 місяці тому +15

      ​@Games-o8c5x Childish.

  • @diaspro.c
    @diaspro.c 3 місяці тому +197

    Because of the title, I clicked on this video expecting an in depth report about every single aspect of your life and an analysis on what things are different from straight parenting. But at the end it was clear: there's no need for convoluted explanations. That single anecdote you shared is the proof and that all that is needed to know is that you had parents that loved you the way every child deserves to be loved. It's so obvious yet it surprised me still.

    • @bent_spoon
      @bent_spoon 3 місяці тому +5

      this is a really sweet comment :))

  • @neuroseptember1020
    @neuroseptember1020 5 років тому +2875

    I have two moms! Nice to see you out here telling your story

    • @BecomingBenSmith
      @BecomingBenSmith  5 років тому +357

      Yes! Thanks so much for sharing September Maeve!! Say hi to your family for me!

    • @akuhimayoumatoi
      @akuhimayoumatoi 4 місяці тому +11

      brooo 😭

    • @syasya030
      @syasya030 4 місяці тому +54

      ​​@@akuhimayoumatoiwdym "broo😭"?

    • @akuhimayoumatoi
      @akuhimayoumatoi 4 місяці тому +71

      @@syasya030 nahh crying cause damn bro shes lucky asf , like i myself also want two mom or dad but its not possible atleast two bestfriend 😮‍💨

    • @mOSs-_IxN
      @mOSs-_IxN 4 місяці тому +14

      ​@@akuhimayoumatoiIt's ok❤ actually nobody can born from 2 moms or 2 dads! So it's ok to be adopted by 2 moms if you would like to
      Search about them and I'm sure you'll find a lovely ones❤

  • @-Ray_Moon-
    @-Ray_Moon- 4 місяці тому +220

    My best friend has two moms and when we first started school I got so confused that she was the only person in my school with that- anyway, years later we’re still best friends and her moms are still the two people that I can trust the same as my own parents :)

  • @LilacpetaI_Art
    @LilacpetaI_Art 3 місяці тому +317

    “If you tell kids that gay people exist they will be confused!”
    Kids when you tell them gay people exist: “oh ok wow cool- anyways 😃”

    • @AbsolutelyAri1
      @AbsolutelyAri1 3 місяці тому +52

      Real I remember hearing the word gay when I was 3 and used context clues to find what it means and thought "Oh, people of the same gender can date? Ok." And didn't think about it more than that

    • @ronydoesstuff
      @ronydoesstuff 3 місяці тому +49

      When i was a kid i saw my aunt kiss her girlfriend and i was confused, so i asked "who is she". She said "my partner" and i was like "ok cool".
      Idk where this thing about kids being confused by gay people comes from.

    • @Crimea_is_crimea
      @Crimea_is_crimea 3 місяці тому +5

      When i was kid I was afraid of them a little

    • @LemonheadPhilosopher
      @LemonheadPhilosopher 3 місяці тому +30

      I remember when I was little, I saw my mom talking to a guy with earings (Yes, he was very handsome) and just being in total awe, like- "I didn't know some boys liked girl stuff, too!" And excitedly talked to my mom about it on the way home. Seeing a male wearing what I grew up to see as 'girl things' was the equivalent of running into a shiny pokemon in the wild.

    • @prettytopia
      @prettytopia 3 місяці тому +15

      I literally thought the same thing as a kid, it was just like normal marriage to me, of course my very religious parents had so much to say about it but I could never understand the reason for homophobia lol

  • @reapnotsow
    @reapnotsow 4 місяці тому +248

    this is such a heartwarming video. i’m a gay man who was also adopted from china and, although i’m not sure if i’ll have kids in the future, it fills me with joy seeing you and your family living and thriving. it gives me hope for the future.

  • @ohits.
    @ohits. 3 місяці тому +250

    WE ARE ACCEPTING OURSELVES WITH THIS ONE ❤🗣🗣💥💥💯💯‼️‼️💥💯🗣❤❤

  • @billsmith6160
    @billsmith6160 5 років тому +1083

    Yes that young Ben Smith was quite a dazzler...

  • @faiirysomi
    @faiirysomi 3 місяці тому +350

    as a lesbian one of my biggest dreams is to be a mom, i always loved children and taking care of them and seeing them happy, but sometimes i think mostly cuz of internalized homophobia i won't be as good as a heterosexual couple of parents, maybe I'll make them mad about their own home and make them go trought discrimination, but this reminded me that there's lots of families of different shapes and forms, but what's important is love and acceptance at the end of the day, im all happy now & ty for sharing ur story 🫶🏻

    • @SeraphicPhantasm
      @SeraphicPhantasm 3 місяці тому +7

      And a child deserves a mother and a father.

    • @liviwaslost
      @liviwaslost 3 місяці тому +2

      @@SeraphicPhantasm children deserve good parents and guardians. Don’t act like you care about adopted children and stfu please 😊

    • @Reggie_DTI
      @Reggie_DTI 3 місяці тому +39

      @@SeraphicPhantasm really shit flys right over ur head huh?

    • @Idkbro-rg9bn
      @Idkbro-rg9bn 3 місяці тому +38

      ​@@SeraphicPhantasm A gay couple can raise a child just as well as a straight couple.

    • @divx1001
      @divx1001 3 місяці тому +2

      ​​@@SeraphicPhantasm no, they dont. Life is a difficult thing. We can't impose unreal ideals on living beings, sorry that you think otherwise but then again people like you are a dying breed. You're either a kid that doesn't know how the world is or a bitter old man that is panicking over his imminent end. Let people live their lives and think about the abandoned children that will never have a mother, a father or even a family member in general. Only heartless people like you are willing to sacrifice people's lives in favour of some religious ideal.

  • @nesse40
    @nesse40 4 роки тому +770

    i had no idea gay dads could adopt back then! But im sooooo glad they could . or thered be no ben smith!

    • @BecomingBenSmith
      @BecomingBenSmith  4 роки тому +144

      Nesse! Wow such a nice comment, thank you so much for watching.

    • @rainb5987
      @rainb5987 3 місяці тому +5

      By exploiting the limits of law. Some gay couples can only have one legal adoptive parent for their adoptive (most states back then require marriage license for joint or couple adoption).

    • @rd3munna812
      @rd3munna812 3 місяці тому +1

      ​@@rainb5987 in my country a guy can only adapt boys and the boy has to be younger than 25 years. i don't have problem with that but gay marriage is illegal 🤧

    • @rainb5987
      @rainb5987 3 місяці тому +2

      @@rd3munna812 What country is that?

  • @mikiyachi2
    @mikiyachi2 4 місяці тому +100

    Your dads seems like kind, caring dads & you get to have TWO of them 💕

  • @kl3321
    @kl3321 4 місяці тому +111

    This gives me a ton of nostalgia for being a kid in the 90s. Glad you had a positive experience with having two dads.

  • @TheDorkWeb
    @TheDorkWeb 5 років тому +384

    I’m speechless. The storytelling - these precious video time capsules - the love your fathers have for you and you for them! I’m soo inspired by your sharing and can’t wait to hear more 🙏💛💛💛!

    • @BecomingBenSmith
      @BecomingBenSmith  5 років тому +8

      The Dork Web! Thank you for your constant support! It's much appreciated and helps me push to create more.

  • @The_Black_Caps
    @The_Black_Caps 4 місяці тому +354

    Kids deserve parents who can give them all the love in the world,no matter the gender❤

    • @G.A-m1t
      @G.A-m1t 2 місяці тому

      So you think it doesn’t matter that you can INLY produce children with 1 man and 1 woman? Isn’t the best place for a child with their parents??? To teach women’s and men’s behaviours and needs???

    • @MM2LEGEND-k2y
      @MM2LEGEND-k2y 2 місяці тому +1

      ​@@G.A-m1t exactly bro whole comment section is brainwashed lmao

    • @The_Black_Caps
      @The_Black_Caps 2 місяці тому +2

      So u guys would rather have kids in foster homes with no one to take care of them than letting loving gay people adopt them? How weird

    • @The_Black_Caps
      @The_Black_Caps 2 місяці тому +1

      I grew up in a home with a man and a woman but my entire life felt like it was mostly just mom, my parents fought continuously making my life miserable. I would have rather had two loving gay parents than them..also what do u guys think abt children with single parents, pretty sure they wud prefer two parents

    • @agusstine
      @agusstine Місяць тому

      ​@@The_Black_Capsthey're speechless, and it only means that they agree with what you've said, it's clear they prefer children rotting in orphans that being adopted by great parents

  • @riverbanzachamploo9725
    @riverbanzachamploo9725 3 місяці тому +47

    I love how we're all being recommended this beautiful video now.

  • @furlycee
    @furlycee 3 місяці тому +15

    The little girl’s response was so beautiful! It’s hard to know if kids will be kind or cruel sometimes when they don’t understand something but she really did have the best response! ❤

  • @theguntersadopt3268
    @theguntersadopt3268 5 років тому +1507

    Thanks for Sharing. My partner and I adopted a 9 yr old boy and we are adopting next year. We keep watching videos from adoptee. This was amazing. :))))))

    • @BecomingBenSmith
      @BecomingBenSmith  5 років тому +136

      Wow, thank you for watching! Hope you're able to share with the rest of your family. What was your favorite part? (Also, was wondering how did you come across my video? Planning for the launch of my next one soon!)

    • @theguntersadopt3268
      @theguntersadopt3268 5 років тому +72

      @@BecomingBenSmith I love how so 80s/90 style the video is. It brought me nostalgia. I had to watch the video again because I had forgotten. I also like the highlight about kids not caring what parents you have. That is unless they were fed hatred. So I. Glad that you met a nice little girl when you were little.

    • @jeonsan8586
      @jeonsan8586 4 місяці тому +10

      Aww hope that go well and you have very cute toddler

    • @labelle1301
      @labelle1301 4 місяці тому +6

      I'm gonna cry/ that's beautiful

    • @RB2013-jj7kq
      @RB2013-jj7kq 4 місяці тому +4

      Groomer

  • @Cattitudo
    @Cattitudo 3 місяці тому +61

    God bless that little girl and her family, if it was the wrong person, it all would go downhill so quickly😭

    • @prettytopia
      @prettytopia 3 місяці тому +12

      I'm sure he must've met a bunch of assholes when he got older, younger kids are typically more accepting of things they don't understand. She probably forgot all about it in an hour lol

  • @Xen-n2z
    @Xen-n2z 3 місяці тому +66

    UA-cam explain yourself! Why you recommend me this after 4 years huh? This is so wholesome!😭💕

  • @RaphaelorFrancis
    @RaphaelorFrancis 9 годин тому +1

    5 years later, a very touching story... 😭😭😭thanks for your sharing.❤ I am from China, pray for good luck and happiness for your family❤❤❤

  • @KatFish682
    @KatFish682 2 місяці тому +6

    That little girl who said she wanted 2 dads made me realize just how much I would have been happy just having 1 dad. Unfortunately, when you’re unwanted, unplanned, & your teenage parents were “forced to keep you,” there’s no love or want for you to even be around. It’s been decades since I last saw him & he doesn't even know how amazing my kids turned out. He missed everything & it is HIS loss. Friends are the family you choose & blood means nothing when you aren't loved or wanted. Great video & I hope everyone learns this excellent message! 💜😽💋

  • @JamesWongLife3
    @JamesWongLife3 2 роки тому +129

    Bro, I literally just cried watching this, it was so good! Great storytelling, loved the editing and the message is beautiful 💛

  • @josephvallo4346
    @josephvallo4346 5 років тому +103

    I enjoyed the video and can personally relate to the story as one of two dads of an adopted child growing up in the 1990s in New York City. So happy to see your story with such a positive message.

    • @BecomingBenSmith
      @BecomingBenSmith  5 років тому +5

      Joseph! Thank you for this and great to hear about your background. I'd love to hear more!

  • @karpinheadphones7377
    @karpinheadphones7377 3 місяці тому +11

    "You have two dads? That's so cool!"
    As a person who don't really remember his dad, even when he is not alive anymore, i can tell that two dads sounds more than one. Especially when they both love you. That's just so amazing bro 💫

  • @nikot4410
    @nikot4410 5 років тому +21

    You just keep making these types of videos. It’s important! You have got a beautiful experience and you gotta share it. Your family is cool, gorgeous, healthy, unique and absolutely normal. And you have the talent to make this!

  • @BecomingBenSmith
    @BecomingBenSmith  4 роки тому +10

    Episode 2 is out: How My Dads Met ua-cam.com/video/FBVaDhjeu2g/v-deo.html
    Hope you're enjoying this series. Let me know if you have any ideas. :)

  • @BabsLongfellow
    @BabsLongfellow 4 роки тому +15

    Discovered your channel today. Love your intelligent and thoughtful dialogue. The videos with your dads when you were a baby made me happy. Absolutely adorable.

  • @lnrplant4722
    @lnrplant4722 4 місяці тому +43

    Don't know why your video's got in my recommendation after so many years, but man.... I wish I could tell about my "parents" so happily as you! And thanks for the advice, appreciate it ☺️

  • @ninabrugel2604
    @ninabrugel2604 5 років тому +24

    Such sweet memories of you joining our family. Being a part of your journey brings me great joy! This is a fantastic video. We love you!

  • @midnightcat6116
    @midnightcat6116 4 місяці тому +90

    Wow. Yt algorithm recommended me this 4 years late. Super cool family! Subscribed.

  • @magsbayou
    @magsbayou 4 місяці тому +22

    Thank you for sharing your story. IMHO this a great time to share these stories and what I hope is it will impress upon people that their children are naturally curious, they will ask and giving them an honest, respectable answer often satisfies their curiosity but also teaches them which contributes towards expanding their horizons. That little girl's response also highlights that we often lead children down a negative path instead of allowing them to stay on their own path of acceptance.

  • @yijouwu3982
    @yijouwu3982 2 місяці тому +4

    This was shared in my company’s LGBTQ+ community and it just made my day. Thank you for this wonderful piece, pure warmth and encouragement. Love and peace from Japan 🇯🇵 🫶

  • @baronessax2114
    @baronessax2114 2 місяці тому +4

    Great advice, embrace yourself. It’s easier said than done and takes years to realize the meaning of it, but finally at 33, I understand that my confused struggle yet commitment to embrace myself (despite the bullying) became a flowering of deeper meaning, fulfillment, gratitude and appreciation for my own uniqueness. Beautiful video, so artistic and great videography. Thanks for sharing

  • @JJ-of6qp
    @JJ-of6qp 2 місяці тому +4

    Family is where the love is! Your dads decided to not just a gay couple but parents too and you are the most important part cause you are the symbol of love unconditional love that anybody can be! Bro you are like a Superman making the bridge between humans! You are a special kid just like your parents! Our world is sick with hatred and many other problems but you guys the 3 of you are a symbol of hope!👏👏👏

  • @HuyĐoàn-c6o
    @HuyĐoàn-c6o 3 місяці тому +26

    I love how the little girl know the definition of 2.different races and 2 dads, she smart fr

  • @ManoaRaine
    @ManoaRaine 5 років тому +24

    I love this man. You told the story so well. I wish I had videos from my childhood like you do

    • @BecomingBenSmith
      @BecomingBenSmith  5 років тому +1

      Thanks Manoa!!! Really appreciate it. Can't wait to create more!

  • @BehindThe5
    @BehindThe5 5 років тому +88

    Ben, this was beautiful and incredibly well done!! The storytelling was fantastic, especially with such an honest, heartfelt voiceover. What a relief it was to hear that girl say "that's so cool!" in response to her asking why you had 2 dads. It's amazing how small interactions like this when you're young can affect you the rest of your life. I wonder what it would have been like growing up if she had said something else, but I'm glad that it was a positive experience :) Also awww young Ben. You didn't just make a youtube video, you made a phenomenal short film. Can't wait to see more videos and learn more about your story! As an adoptee, I can relate to having others wonder why my parents don't look like me, but I just openly tell them that I'm adopted. Embracing that is the best thing you can do!

    • @BecomingBenSmith
      @BecomingBenSmith  5 років тому +10

      Wowwww! Lily, thank you so much for this very thoughtful response. I absolutely agree, these small interactions can often compound over time. They play a large part in our development, shaping us into who we are and how we feel about ourselves. I am very lucky and grateful that she and many of my peers were enthusiastic and accepting of my differences. What a special thing. Thanks for your insight, Lily! I really appreciate it and can't wait to share more and to continue learning from your journey.

  • @barbarastorper9241
    @barbarastorper9241 5 років тому +29

    I loved this, and since I know your both fathers, and know how full of love they are, i'm so glad they found you so that you could form this beautiful family...love to you all.

  • @livysyn6
    @livysyn6 3 місяці тому +7

    I love this. I was adopted by two men. I also got questioned by friends growing up why I didn’t have a mom but had two dads. I remember a friend saying her mom was asking if my dad was gay. I had no idea what that meant at the time. I just saw my parents as my parents.

  • @starryburst863
    @starryburst863 3 місяці тому +2

    What struck me most is them teaching you to take deep breaths when you feel bad...
    Man, you're really loved. Never had that with my mom and dad

  • @steam_jane5580
    @steam_jane5580 11 місяців тому +22

    This story is so cute, I'm glad you got such a nice first response

  • @727usuario
    @727usuario 5 років тому +121

    Ok now I'm crying, love it, just beautiful

  • @springsison7
    @springsison7 3 місяці тому +4

    Wow! This made me cry! Very great narration! All I see is love. Your two dads for each other, their love for you and your love for yourself. Thank you for sharing this. Much love to you and your family. 💙

  • @Zarzar22
    @Zarzar22 3 місяці тому +3

    My best friend as a child was adopted by two dads. I met him when I was 4 and not ONCE did I think it was weird that he had two dads, it was just how his family was. Proud you stayed confident in yourself and had others to accept you as well, its so important for a kid

  • @debbienelson9095
    @debbienelson9095 4 роки тому +13

    Ben, this is beautiful. This is the first video of yours that I stumbled upon. I look forward to watching more. My husband and I have adopted two children. We are white and our son is Mexican. He looks nothing like us. I understand how families can look different. Thank you for sharing your story.

  • @yejia7205
    @yejia7205 4 місяці тому +4

    this is a masterpiece, the way you show all that love of your family made me cry a little, its really lovely

  • @eddivinagracia1430
    @eddivinagracia1430 4 місяці тому +7

    Sending love from the Philippines. You are THE BEN SMITH! God loves you!
    Continue to love yourself being you.

  • @sarawatswife
    @sarawatswife 4 місяці тому +25

    I've been recommended this 4 years later and I am happy:))))

  • @talktalktalk748
    @talktalktalk748 2 місяці тому +4

    Two Dads here also! Thankful for our son and daughter ❤

  • @vin.l1l-I
    @vin.l1l-I Місяць тому +2

    This story is so amazing, I am actually crying right now while watching these footages with you and your dads

  • @amyknutson8118
    @amyknutson8118 14 днів тому +2

    What is the most important thing is the child/children have a safe, happy, fun, loving, and supportive family. Not if you have 2 moms, 2 dad's or whatever else.

  • @Aron64r
    @Aron64r 4 місяці тому +37

    As a young gay guy (15) I’ve been thinking about having kids and my future overall… in this economy I’m not sure I’ll be able to but if things get better by the time I have a partner then I could have a kid. Although I know I’m thinking quite far ahead it’s something I still want to have. I’m so glad my fyp showed me this ty :)

  • @leavemealone1741
    @leavemealone1741 4 місяці тому +88

    Proof that Kids in same sex homes are just as happy as kids in Hetero households. Except more challenges because of society .

    • @YaqpokAnime
      @YaqpokAnime 4 місяці тому

      Nahhhhh hell😊

    • @jee2158
      @jee2158 4 місяці тому +27

      ​@@YaqpokAnimeI wish that you'll be blessed with a loving life and family.

    • @YaqpokAnime
      @YaqpokAnime 4 місяці тому +2

      @@jee2158 I have a good family 😊

    • @Bilbilaul
      @Bilbilaul 4 місяці тому +1

      ​@@YaqpokAnimeyou lie. We all know your father abandoned you and your mom😂

    • @Unresolvedissues101
      @Unresolvedissues101 4 місяці тому +2

      ​@haresonaga that is evident

  • @ryanscarola
    @ryanscarola 5 років тому +167

    This is terrific! Thanks for this!! I love it.
    My husband and I brought our son home from New Jersey last month. He's one month old now. I've often wondered how it'll shake out when he goes off to school.

    • @BecomingBenSmith
      @BecomingBenSmith  5 років тому +30

      Wow! Congrats Ryan and let me know how his first day goes -- hopefully this provided some insight. What was your favorite part?

    • @heinuchung8680
      @heinuchung8680 4 роки тому +10

      Kids will be curious for one second then say “oh the wiggles new sonG lol”

    • @brownbear1657
      @brownbear1657 3 роки тому +5

      how did it go?

    • @Axqu7227
      @Axqu7227 3 місяці тому +1

      I hope your son is enjoying preschool!

  • @BtsxKatseyexTxt
    @BtsxKatseyexTxt 4 місяці тому +12

    i was smiling so hard but at the same time had tears streaming down my face bc this hit so close to home for me, i grew up with two dad people made fun of me but i loved them and i never saw anything wrong with it "love is love right? so why can't they be in love in peace, so can you mid your own?!" is what would said a lot to people and "why do you care who THEY get intimate with?!" i was made fun of bc my two dad, by the time i got to mid school i hated my dad bc of what thoes people did to me bc of them but then they sat me down and said "don't listen to anyone, k , we try to move you to a dif school and we make sure it never happens anymore" ( it was something like that, was a long time ago) and they did that. i stop hated them and this just made my day bc im older now and bi with a girlfriend 9 im a girl) and i want kids but i don't want my kids to thought what i did to have hate for me.

  • @jameshamilton5168
    @jameshamilton5168 5 років тому +141

    I'm looking forward to your journey becoming Ben Smith.

    • @BecomingBenSmith
      @BecomingBenSmith  5 років тому +9

      Thank you James! I can't want to share more videos with you.

  • @Allandacky
    @Allandacky 4 місяці тому +48

    No but I am so happy seeing someone just living there life and being happy with two das, it gives me hope as a gay man :)

  • @wichetleelamanit6195
    @wichetleelamanit6195 4 місяці тому +47

    Honestly I was never curious about your family name. Look, so many Williams, Brown, Smith and.. In fact, your dads are gorgeous and you are very handsome. You have a wonderful family and home. Millions of people around the world want to have a happy life as you do.

  • @lilac.patels
    @lilac.patels 4 місяці тому +11

    This is so adorable! Why wasn't I recommended this earlier?! I loved this so much

  • @LimAmli
    @LimAmli 3 роки тому +4

    This is... Precious, beautiful... The narrative in words and images. Thanks for sharing.

  • @plaguedoctor2k
    @plaguedoctor2k 2 роки тому +4

    It's very rarely that I stumble upon videos like these and I AM SO HAPPY I DID🥺🥰😍. I'm definitely saving this one. It was great watching ur story. U are definitely unique bro.

  • @christinedoherty848
    @christinedoherty848 5 років тому +7

    This is so awesome Ben! I remember the day you arrived! We were all so excited to meet you! It seems like yesterday to me. Fantastic job. Cant wait to see the rest of the videos! Love MC!

  • @Dwangz36
    @Dwangz36 5 років тому +17

    Can't wait for the next video in two years!

  • @HappyBill-i6j
    @HappyBill-i6j 4 місяці тому +6

    So true… sometimes people are just curious- not trying to be hurtful with their questions.

  • @rhondahoward8025
    @rhondahoward8025 3 місяці тому +2

    Bro there’s people out there without one dad. It’s blessed to have two!

  • @trunghluong
    @trunghluong 19 днів тому +2

    Wow, the responding saying that that's so cool is so cute and pure. I love it.

  • @dakotagarcia7781
    @dakotagarcia7781 3 місяці тому +7

    Welcome to the algorithm friend. I really needed a good video to pick me up this morning. I am just running a small shop by myself in texas, and im just emotionally touched by the amount of love and effort put into your content. and the love and effort put into raising you into the person you are today. new subscriber here!

  • @nickibleze_
    @nickibleze_ Рік тому +10

    You story gave me a big hopes , thanks 🫂

  • @ServiceUnavailable
    @ServiceUnavailable 2 місяці тому +4

    My neighbours are lesbians, one has teenagers from a previous relationship. They make it work so well, great people

  • @naesworld
    @naesworld 3 місяці тому +2

    omg this was so touching 🥺 adding it to the list of my fav videos on youtube

  • @vandrar3n
    @vandrar3n 2 місяці тому +1

    Glad I got this recommended. These are times for wholesome videos that promote awareness about the LGBT+ community and their relatives.

  • @ROMAN-oo8vh
    @ROMAN-oo8vh 3 місяці тому +7

    Joining the 4 years later gang! So glad this popped up on my recommended!

  • @melodytheyeen
    @melodytheyeen 10 місяців тому +17

    this is criminally underviewed. shoutout to dad and dad for raising you

  • @SouthernFriedMikey
    @SouthernFriedMikey 5 років тому +4

    Subscribed after your dads linked to your channel in our Gay Dads group. This is amazing and beautiful thank you so much for making this

    • @BecomingBenSmith
      @BecomingBenSmith  5 років тому +1

      Thank you so much! Can't wait to share more. have any ideas for me?

  • @deanster7216
    @deanster7216 3 місяці тому +1

    Yknow this is wholesome. I can genuinely see the love your family has . It's something not everyone feels about their home. Gender stuff etc aside- it reminded me that good parents are important , good people foster happy children and stable homes. You are blessed and lucky to have a lovely home 🌱 And they're blessed to have such a happy child like you. Wholesome stuff.

  • @BrandonMarshall-n4n
    @BrandonMarshall-n4n 20 днів тому

    It's really good to see you embraced this type of Family dynamic rather rebelled against which many I think do in your situation do to peer pressures of what normal is. I too am gay and hope to maybe adopt one day or do suragocy. So this gives me a bit of hope and enlightenment on the subject. Thank you for making this video ! Kudos

  • @millardmott5065
    @millardmott5065 5 років тому +27

    Absolutely wonderful story. Couldn't help but think of how proud Grandma/pa Bennie and Larry would be of you.

  • @SiriusA111-08
    @SiriusA111-08 4 місяці тому +17

    This does not look like just a video, it look like something that fit right into educational children's TV shows! Very well put together 🙂

  • @Mayodirt
    @Mayodirt 3 місяці тому +20

    On 4:41 the girls are like WTF are you recording me for 😭😭

  • @icicle8384
    @icicle8384 14 днів тому +1

    Nahhhh this is one of the cutest videos I`ve ever seen. YOU WERE SOOOOOOOOOO ADORABLE!!!

  • @preciousone9377
    @preciousone9377 2 місяці тому +1

    Parenting is not an easy job no matter who’s raising the child. To the children I feel they are just glad someone CHOSE to love and commitment to them as parents, that’s HUGE! I’m not gonna lie, I have mixed feelings about it, but ultimately, I’m appreciative of anyone willing to step up to such a major commitment and also for the children that get to have their love and support.

  • @mocuuaa
    @mocuuaa 3 місяці тому +6

    This is so cute bruh 😭 I noticed how many videos they took of you like damn not even some straight parents nowadays love their kid genuinely. But instead using them for views 😕 I was so glad you experienced a positive childhood‼️🙏

  • @ronnieandtheriots
    @ronnieandtheriots 4 роки тому +4

    What an amazing, bright, & hopeful future we ALL will have as long as young men [& women] like Ben make all the world aware of the same opportunity to grow up in the "modern culture" he is promoting with his vlog. Ben, you are amazing, bright, & hopeful. You are truly what "It Gets Better" is all about. In all my 71 years of searching, I have found in your attitude the purpose, reason, & idealism we are all meant to live.

  • @BosisofSweden
    @BosisofSweden Місяць тому +3

    Imagine that there are so many people hating on this and wanting all flowers to be the same sort and only white. Love this. Rock on Ben and dads!

    • @BosisofSweden
      @BosisofSweden Місяць тому +1

      @Jatemis333 Totally agree.

    • @staybased9320
      @staybased9320 Місяць тому

      shut up and let the immigrants take care of Sweden.

  • @felucca
    @felucca 3 місяці тому +2

    It's a good idea to prepare a small child who's different for those questions. Children are so curious and have no filter, so those questions are bound to come up, and having already been presented with a good answer by your parents can really help.
    (No need to make a big deal out of it, of course, since the point is that it's not a big deal - just putting words on something in a positive/neutral way will help the child to later use those words themselves.)