Homunculus / Trickle 【Original Song】
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- Опубліковано 1 жов 2024
- I'm lower than the dirt...
Homunculus / Trickle【3rd Original Song】
Listen on Spotify | tinyurl.com/Tr...
While Homunculus is part of my Ghost Town song series,
I wrote this song to be something special for everyone.
What does Homunculus mean for you?
Credits
Music/Lyrics/Vocals: Me
‣ Music/Arrangement/Composition: @tikaal
X | @tikaal_coto
See how Tikaal made the music: | • Trickle - Homunculus B...
‣ MV: @Venz228
X | @venz228
Inst: tinyurl.com/Tr...
Follow Trickle
X | / trickleyt
TikTok | / trickleyt
IG | / trickle_yt
Discord | Trickle's Discord Server | / discord
Support Trickle
Merch | trickle-shop.f...
Patreon | / trickleyt
subscribe or i'll eat you ヽ(`⌒´メ)ノ
#Trickle #Homunculus #JPop #anime #vocaloid #animemusicvideo #fyp #vtuber #utaite #youtaite
I'm a Christian who wants to glorify the God who loves me in all that I do! So if you're interested in learning about the Bible, feel free to check out this link ^^ tinyurl.com/Tr...
‣ Characters: Limon, Mudd, & Muddon
- / 1573708873969475584
Lyrics
I realized in my last life
That I hate the light
So I keep running
And running
I'm trying to hide
From everything that's inside
This heart that I've tried
To erase and wash away all the shame
Scared to death of what's within
There's bleeding kind of beating, deep beneath the skin
Feel it rattle, ravage, all my sin
Hear it scream behind my chest again
No alchemy can give me what I wish I could be
So I'll try a different body
Just a dash of this and that
A touch of blood and add some mud
My wishes, fears, and painful tears
I wonder when I'll have enough
No form of love can give me what I wish I could be
I pray just change me
I'm broken, torn, and tattered
I'll never be full again
I'll close my eyes and shatter
My heart, rebuild from the start
Disgusting
Even if I somehow find a way to feel alive, I
Realized in my last life
That I hate the light
So I keep running
And running
I'm trying to hide
From everything that's inside
This heart that I've tried
To erase and wash away all the shame
To erase and wash away all the shame
Stuck in the mud in my mind, if I clean up, I swear that I'd shine
I am confined to what is inside
Eating away at the thoughts that I'm trying to hide
And I'm sick of all this wondering if I even deserve to live
I think it's best I rip these feeling out with the rest of it
The breath of life was my demise
I'm cursed until the day I die
Perhaps a better set of eyes
Will blind me from this sin of mine
I've been forsaken, I'm breaking, can take it again
So take from me my mind and let me be
I'm lower than the dirt
A worthless Homunculus
Sick of this
Even if I somehow find a way to feel alive, I
Realized in my last life
That I hate the light
So I keep running
And running
I'm trying to hide
From everything that's inside
This heart that I've tried
To erase and wash away all the shame
To erase and wash away all the shame
Toil all day, till this rotten clay
Water and blood just aren't enough
To fill my heart up
Over and over I try to reshape
Crying in shame as I take the pain out
Maybe that can change me
That can save me
I'm broken, torn, and tattered
I'll never be full again
I'll close my eyes and shatter
My heart, rebuild from the start
Disgusting
Even if I somehow find a way to feel alive, I
Realized in my last life
That I hate the light
So I keep running
And running
I'm trying to hide
So maybe in my next life
I'll finally find
Find a way to wash away all the shame
To erase and wash away all the shame
![Vane - Collared (ft. SAROS) [SynthV Original]](/img/n.gif)
🏺THANK YOU FOR 1MIL VIEWS🏺
‣ Check out my NEW original song, Omamori! There's lots of tasty Ghost Town lore in it 👅 ua-cam.com/video/sEe9pUzFwkg/v-deo.htmlsi=TsRZNEghiRIWLAoL
I cannot believe an original song of mine managed to reach so many hearts and ears... Thank you for listening! I'm working on new original music for 2024, so please look forward to it🙇🏼♂️
Homunculus is just one part of a multimedia project I am working on called "Ghost Town". It is a story told through music, manga, novels, and videos! I hope that you look forward to more of the story unraveling 💙
It's so good the art the vocal range aaaaaa I love it =9 more pls
ITS GOOD BRO. And i hope you loved me seeing remake your thumbnail from twitter!
You wrote trash
Honestly, I am just really glad to see Christians who don't view the LGBTQ+ community as wrong or sinful. It is a scary world out there right now, and it is nice to see that the loud, hate filled voice isn't representative of the whole group.
Even as someone who isn't in the faith, I enjoy this song.
@@bestaround3323where the hell did you get that stereotype, I was raised in a school full of sisters and nuns and the only thing they wanted to teach us was to be a good person and to treat others with the same respect you have on yourself.
Song: talks about depression, anxiety and self-hate
Me and the boys dancing to it like it's konga:
real
I love the song because of the feeling of controlled chaos!
FR--
I myself am agnostic, but this song resonates with me like no other. I deal with a lot awful self esteem and this song perfectly reflects some of those thoughts that show up. Also in general the sound of this is impeccable from the instrumentals and vocals.
Same here!
日本語なし ?
@@白キロ No Espanol?
Oi! I hope you'll find your peace eventually! Thank you for sharing your feelings with us!...💖 i really respect that! Cool!
But,am i allowed to ask what agnostic is? Im very unfamiliar with that term,but i may have this as well? At least its possible
@@SlushSlushieShrimpy it's like being atheistic but more willing to accept that God might exist. At least that's what I've gathered.
Morse Code translations:
0:50 & 2:52 - You're worthless you know it. Why even bother (x2)
0:53 & 2:54 - Nobody even wants you. You're not good enough. (x2.5)
0:56 & 2:58 - Look at you.
0:57 & 2:59 - You will never be good enough. Look at you, you make me sick (x2.5)
1:06 & 1:58 & 3:07 - Ahh!!
2:50 - Save... me... Save me (x2)
3:00 - I'll close my eyes and shatter.
Thank you for the translation!
@@dootdoot3065 No problem! I'm glad people appreciate it 😊
omg tysm!!!
Thank you very much! I was wondering what some of them were ^^
actual hero
it's about religion it's about religious trauma it's about gender it's about sexuality it's about body dysmorphia it's about isolation from community it's about a funky little shapeshifter dude who becomes a wolf thing but most importantly it fuck severely (it's very good and I like it and it rotates in my brain frequently)
This also rotates in my brain frequently
Oh, I also find that this song suits masking and trying on different personalities to get people to like you
For me it’s about my dysphoria as i am transmasc and lack self esteem, but i think it’s so amazing that it can mean different things and be so special to so many people
@@aarasko ikr, I love things that can have a sh1t ton of interpretations. I love looking into different perspectives!
Also wanna add therian into the interpretation pile :]
I was in charge of the animated music video!
thank you for having me! it was a pleasure working with you Trickle😊
Your animation work is amazing venz
Thank you for your work!! You did a fantastic job!! ^^
Thank you so much for the incredible work! You're beyond gifted and it was a real pleasure to be able to work with you again💙
Thank you for your hard work!! You did such an amazing job omfg like I'm obsessed with the way it came out! 😩💖💖💖
U DID GREAT
as someone with depression and dysphoria who found no solace in religion, i pretty much interpreted the song as the opposite of what was originally intended, lol, and yet it really resonated with me! i think it's amazing how your lyrics are so versatile and open to interpretation, and speak to so many people because of it.
Oh hey same
Same, I didn't even realize it was about what it was
Same. I think it's so cool that this song can resonate with everyone. For example, both Christians and people in the lgbt community can resonate and bond over this, interpreting it in different ways, even when the two communities are usually at eachothers throats. I think it shows that peace isn't impossible to happen in the future, and that's kinda nice to think about.
Saaame.
@@HelmsmanButterscotch_OwO as a Christian most of us don't pay attention to the lgb stuff but has changed and the trans community is mainly a factor of it due to the violent nature of the stuff they have been doing and than that's tied to the lgb people there are two sides to each story but I'm telling the truth about what's going on right now
How does your voice just.... do that? Like... all of that?
Actually incredible. You're so talented and every single song you put out is a musical treat. This song is amazing; it's an easy full-day-play-on-repeat banger. Thank you.
FRRRRR
It sounded like japanese without seeing the lyrics.
@@vocaloidteto and your name+-
I'm not gonna say it
@@BVK. name say " gore loer"
same how the hell do he say ²¤¿¼³³³³€€€¿³€¿€€¿€€€¿³v®®®¿®
The animation is so gorgeous holy crap, love the song too, absolute banger
Thank you so much, you are so cracked so your praise means a lot to me 🙇🏼♂️
Wow its dropster, worlds collide man
christian j-pop is probably a new genre
HAHAHAHAH!! LET'S GOOOOO 🤣
Finally, Christian music I can enjoy!
Edit:
I do want to clarify, It's not "Christian Music" (in the sense that it appeals exclusively to people of faith), I'm just a Christian who makes music. For me, Homunculus is partly a song about who I use to be- what God saved me from. But that's what it means for *me*. But I wrote it to be something special for everyone.
As a Christian weeb I approve.
imagine the church ensemble just starts blasting “homunculus”
Finally something i like. Normal Christian music kinda bores me so this is great
@@Litol.fvx_vs what about Toby Mac or NF?
I know this song is far from being about this, but I relate to this song so hard as someone with autism.
The puzzle pieces feeling like people who say they care, but not enough to know about the most basic of things.
So many things that remind me of the autistic experience
Many autistic people struggle with identity, struggle with outside world, and people in general.
This song is great, its incredibly well made and giant props to the animator. I could go into how i relate to each line when it comes to autism, but we'd be here all day lol.
I'm happy to hear that you're able to feel heard through my song! My goal with this song was for it to be widely relatable on many different levels 💙
Yeah it really did resonate with me and my experiences on the spectrum
can i just say as someone who isnt christian anymore and grew up in a christian household where i was forced to only listening to only christian music growing up, this song is one of the best ones ive ever heard. a lot of the songs i heard growing up were either about how excited people were to die and meet god or about how great and holy he is. which you know is fine and all but it felt like every song and it kind of made me sad since i was pretty well read on the bible and theres so many stories and versus you can take from and make something truely beautiful with and you... went and did that. you did something that I've wanted to see since i was a young kid. i may not walk down that religious path anymore, but seeing you inspired by your own religion to create something beautiful and with heart made me really happy.
im still christian, and im sorry you were forced into those ideals. my parents, mainly one of them, was heavy on the religion aspect but never forced me to only listen/watch christian stuff. I understand why you would walk away from that situation. sucks people like that exist :/
@@ChilledBacon yeah! i really appreciate you understanding since any time i mention this to people, they immediately turn around and go "well god is always waiting for you don't worry" which isn't the most reassuring thing to tell someone with religious trauma. im really happy you can find joy in your religion though!!! keep doing what makes you happy!
Sorry you went through that, i had parents who were very VERY religious and wouldn't let me listen or do anything they considered devilish and sinful, so when i listened to USSEEWA i for some reason felt better after that and my parents took away my device and told me i would go to hell because i betrayed their (my parents) trust? I was like 8 at the time this was happening but i remember some of it clearly, and so they would lock me in a closet and start reciting a prayer every night for 2 weeks, and so when i tried to talk to my religious relatives (i didn't know they were religious) they just said "just ask god for forgiveness and pray!" After that i gave up on trying to rebel and by the time i was 10 i remember standing on the edge of a bridge after i ran away from home, and a very nice woman saw me and immediately got me down and called the police, they came, i told them where i lived (took a bit because i wasn't and still not good with talking), my parents get arrested i think(?), and then i get put into an orphanage, WOAH this is long, kinda forgot what i was doing lol
Anyways i get a good family the end
I am sorry to hear about these experiences you guys have had. I also grew up in a toxic, pseudo-religious household with parents who would substitute scripture with their own beliefs and force it on me as if it's God's word. I avoided church and developing an understanding of the Bible until about a year ago (though for the last 4 years I have been studying various religions and theologies), when I began going to my local church only to find that what I had been taught growing up was not only not Biblical, but anti-Biblical. As Christians, we should NEVER force our beliefs or persecute others who don't share them. That is not living with the peace, joy, and comfort of the Spirit and it's often a reflection of people insecure about their beliefs. It's damaging to everyone and Christians should not be spreading hatred at all- especially not when it comes to spreading the Gospel of all things!
Even when Jesus was being beaten, tortured, crucified, and ridiculed, he never yelled at or forced himself onto anyone- and if anyone had the right to, it was him!
Unfortunately, a lot of people get stuck in the selfish thought that "if they don't agree with me, I have to be angry and force it on them!"
But I can tell you that those people are not living a lifestyle that they are called to live, if they truly are Christian.
If you ever want to email me with any questions about the Bible, please feel free to message me at TrickleYT@gmail.com and again, I am so sorry that you've had bad "Christian" examples. Unfortunately that's very common.
I like to make the Gospel readily accessible in my descriptions for anyone who wants it because of the way that it has set my heart free!
I used to struggle with depression and suicidal tendencies for years and could never find a way out until I began to explore my relationship with the Lord. So I want to spread that hope to anyone who feels called the same way I did!
I don't get notifications for all of my comments, so if you ever wanna get ahold of me, just shoot an email!
I hope that this message finds you, or anyone else down the road, in peace and love :)
I'm aslo someone who used to be a christian, though the people who raised me in faith aren't bad people nor had bad intentions. Even then, I find ironic how I relate so much which this song, written by someone inspired by his faith and who could move forward thanks to it, when in my case it was leaving behind religion what helped me. Not that I have any problem againts the author, i just find it courious.
Trickle,
i live in a Christian family and i showed this to my mom (bear in mind she hates music that isnt worship/hymnal) ...she started crying. She said that it felt so accurate to her personal journey when i deciphered the morse code for her. So I want to thank you for this song. She now regularly listen to your original music, and your covers. Again tysm for making this ❤❤❤
God is good to the weary who come to Him for rest. I was so moved reading this... Please let your mother know that I am so thankful to hear that she has trusted in the Lord for salvation and that I will be praying for her and her family!
God is good and I am so grateful that He brought me to Him while I was lost in my sins. The world has so many distractions and empty promises, but God never fails and His word stays true! I look forward to being able to sing God's praises together in Heaven 💙
Please remind her that it is by Grace we are saved (Ephesians 2:8-9), not by our works- For no man is justified by the law (Galatians 2:16), so she can rest easy knowing that God has done all of the work for her on the cross when Christ died the death that we deserve because of His great love for us sinners (Romans 5:8-9)! Much love and peace to you and your family!
@@Trickle_Official tysm, i started crying reading this, the world is so blessed to have amazing Godly people like you ^^
I added onto my message since I accidentally clicked send early, hahaha, so I hope you can pass all that on and even be encouraged yourself by it my friend :)
God bless you, and thank you for listening to my silly music!
It came out for me today on Spotify and wow.. I’m just completely blown away. It’s absolutely incredible, and I know that I’ll just have this on loop for the next few days. Maybe weeks or months or longer. Congrats on 50k, Trickle! It’s well-deserved.
Oh wow!! You must be hours ahead of me, then! I'm so happy that you liked Homunculus, thank you so very much! I can't wait to know how you feel about the MV, too 💙
someone PLEASE tell me how this doesn’t have millions of views??? it deserves SO much more. wonderful job
😭😭😭
Thank you!!!
Been a year it's almost there
Well don’t I have news for you!
@@AlbertWeskersLittleMan let's gooo
First Million!
This song was made me realize I was getting rid of my emotion to cope with past trauma and holy shit has this resonated with me. The pain of being chased by trauma that just won't leave you alone and trying literally everything to escape it.
Buddy, you shouldn't do that. Emotions are what make us human, what makes us feel love and hate. People without emotion and no regard for others are what we call psychopaths, psycho a root for emotion, and path a root for "none" or "a person who doesn't have"
@@xuan2336 you're right, and I _have_ been trying (and seems like succeeding!) To get back my emotions since I noticed, since I know that desensitizing to emotion is not good.
@@Tr0lliPop How'doya do that?
@@TeapotsAreGreatHats _this?_ you need to put underscores "_" around the thing you're italicizing. _you can also do it with more than one word!_
Lyrics for the ones absolutely addict like me :
I realized in my last life that I hate the light
So I keep running and running, I'm trying to hide
From everything that's inside, this heart that I've tried
To erase and wash away all the shame
Scared to death of what's within
There's a bleeding kind of beating, deep beneath the skin
The rattle, ravage, all my sin
Hear it scream behind my chest again
No alchemy can give me what I wish I could be
So I'll try a different body!
Just a dash of this and that. A touch of blood and add some mud
My wishes, fears, and painful tears. I wonder when I'll have enough
No form of love can give me what I wish I could be
I'll pray just change me!
I'm broken, torn, and tattered
I'll never be full again
I'll close my eyes and shatter
My heart, rebuild from the start
Dis-gus-ting!
Even if I somehow find a way to feel alive,
I......aaaAAAAAA
Realized in my last life that I fear the light
So I keep running and running, I'm trying to hide
From everything that's inside, this heart that I've tried
To erase and wash away all the shame!
To erase and wash away all the shame!!!
Stuck in the mud in my mind, If I clean it up, I swear that I'd shine
I am confined to what is inside
Eating away at the thoughts that I'm trying to hide
And I'm sick of all this wondering if I even deserve to feel alive
I think it's best I rip these feelings out with the rest of it
The breath of life was my demise, I'm cursed until the day I die
Perhaps a better set of eyes will blind me from this sin of mine
I've been forsaken, I'm breakin', can't take it again
So peel from me my mind and let me be
I'm lower than the dirt
A worthless homonculus
Sick of this!
Even if I somehow find a way to feel alive,
I.....aaaAAAA
Realized in my last life that I hate the light
So I keep running and running, I'm trying to hide
From everything that's inside, this heart that I've tried
To erase and wash away all the shame!
To erase and wash away all the shame!!!
Toil all day, till this rotten clay
Water and blood just aren't enough
To fill my heart up
Over and over, I try to reshape
Crying in shame as I take the pain out
Maybe...
That can change me
That can save me
I'm broken, torn, and tattered
I'll never be full again
I'll close my eyes and shatter
My heart, rebuild from the start
Dis-gus-ting !
Even if I somehow find a way to feel alive
I.....aaaAAAAA
Realized in my last life that I hate the light
So I keep running and running, I'm trying to hide
So maybe in my next life, I'll finally find
Find a way to wash away all the shame!
To erase and wash away all the shame!!!
_________________________________
THAT'S IT GUYS I hope I wrote all of this without a mistake, hope you'll enjoy trying to sing along with the song!!
(Fr this song is so insane trickle ilu
Dude, the lyrics are literally _in_ the video
@@seldrake_fox7893 it's better to have something to look at while singing than trying to catch the lyrics in the video tho
I know this song is about something else but; as a homosexual who grew up in a homophobic community this song has a lot of personal connections I can relate to.
I'm glad you made the theme ambiguous so people can make their own connections to the song as well.
That Is so me lol
The "try different body" part also hits me hard cuz im having like the worst gender dysphoria in years, i really love this song
Oh boy, read the document trickle putted in the description. Its pretty homophobic
Edit: This was in response to someone's comment, but they have since deleted it.
I encourage you to read the document, and see that I point to myself first and foremost as a sinful person who, even as a Christian, continues to sin. It's not my place to judge anyone or make them change- conviction and repentance both come from God, not from people.
I genuinely believe that the Bible is the Word of God and I want to honor God as best as I can- it's out of love that God has told us what's against Him and what separates us from Him. I believe this with all my heart, so for me to not mention that we can't work our way into Heaven, and that Christ has paid the price for us and calls those who trust in Him to live lives for Him would be the opposite of loving for me to do.
I'm not telling anyone how to live their lives, I'm spreading what I believe is God's Word and am letting Him do the rest. No Christian and no person has the right to pass judgement on anyone, God is the judge of us all- He commands all Christians to love one another; we're no better than anyone else. Our righteousness only comes from Jesus, not from our behavior because, at the end of the day, I'm still a sinful human being standing before a righteous God.
I hope that you can see the way that I interact with my fanbase, despite whatever background they come from, with love and gratitude, and not label me with blanket statements that don't understand the core of what I believe or take into account the way I behave.
I also don't want this message to come across as me just standing up for myself, but for me standing up for the God who loved me enough to lay down His life for me and conquer death so that I may live a life of peace here on earth, and an eternity with Him who loves me.
While I was still His enemy in my sins, Christ died for me. And that's a love worth serving to me.
Also, I would like to add that this song is open to be interpreted by anyone in any way. Just because I'm a Christian doesn't mean that my beliefs are to be imposed on the rest of the world or art. Homunculus isn't a Christian song, just a song written by a Christian.
I hope this message finds you well, and in peace, my friend 💙
@@sadisticanonymity Oh, I was responding to a different person but it seems that they have since deleted their comment :/
@@Trickle_OfficialOh okay that makes sense, I was confused because I couldn’t understand how what you were saying related to the original comment.
No can we just talk about Trickle’s vocal range? Like one moment he can sing low and relaxed then later he can sing high and passionate. It’s honestly so cool and impressive.
I originally interpreted the song in a different way, but I also like the original! Here’s my own interpretation (I might flesh it out more later):
So I think this song is about society as a whole and how you can never “be good enough”, no matter how many times you try to change it will never be enough in society’s eyes and I feel as if there is so much pressure on these standards it’s overwhelming “you have to act like this.” “You have to look like that.” And if someone doesn’t follow these they’re looked down upon or viewed as a “monster”.
@@minty111 it’s in the description box!
Yeah i guess u don't have to say "as atheist" cus this has nothing to do with being atheist
Like... this is the general interpolation for that
nothin special.
mine is something with body dysmorphia
@@null6482 well it does have something to do with it, cuz the actual meaning has to do with finding meaning in god, well from what I see in the description.
@@_Ter1an_ oh i didnt see that...thx tho
Hello, I am Trickle. This is my second original song- Homunculus.
Listen on **Spotify** : Tinyurl.com/TrickleYT
Homunculus is connected to Ghost Town.
So while the song has personal meanings for me and anyone who listens to it, it also has meaning in the context of lore.
Subscribe or I'll eat you ヽ(`⌒´メ)ノ
- - -
Listen on Spotify:
- Tinyurl.com/TrickleYT
If you would like to support the channel, consider supporting me on Patreon or PayPal! My covers are not monetized, so anything at all goes a long way 🙇🏼♂️
- Patreon.com/TrickleYT
- Paypal.me/TrickleYT
-
LYRICS:
I realized in my last life
That I hate the light
So I keep running
And running
I'm trying to hide
From everything that's inside
This heart that I've tried
To erase and wash away all the shame
Scared to death of what's within
There's bleeding kind of beating, deep beneath the skin
Feel the rattle, ravage, all my sin
Hear it scream behind my chest again
No alchemy can give me what I wish I could be
So I'll try a different body
Just a dash of this and that
A touch of blood and add some mud
My wishes, fears, and painful tears
I wonder when I'll have enough
No form of love can give me what I wish I could be
I pray just change me
I'm broken, torn, and tattered
I'll never be full again
I'll close my eyes and shatter
My heart, rebuild from the start
Disgusting
Even if I somehow find a way to feel alive
I
Realized in my last life
That I hate the light
So I keep running
And running
I'm trying to hide
From everything that's inside
This heart that I've tried
To erase and wash away all the shame
To erase and wash away all the shame
Stuck in the mud in my mind, if I clean up, I swear that I'd shine
I am confined to what is inside
Eating away at the thoughts that I'm trying to hide
And I'm sick of all this wondering if I even deserve to live
I think it's best I rip these feeling out with the rest of it
The breath of life was my demise
I'm cursed until the day I die
Perhaps a better set of eyes
Will blind me from this sin of mine
I've been forsaken, I'm breaking, can take it again
So take from me my mind and let me be
I'm lower than the dirt
A worthless Homunculus
Sick of this
Even if I somehow find a way to feel alive
I
Realized in my last life
That I hate the light
So I keep running
And running
I'm trying to hide
From everything that's inside
This heart that I've tried
To erase and wash away all the shame
To erase and wash away all the shame
Toil all day, till this rotten clay
Water and blood just aren't enough
To fill my heart up
Over and over I try to reshape
Crying in shame as I take the pain out
Maybe that can change me
That can save me
I'm broken, torn, and tattered
I'll never be full again
I'll close my eyes and shatter
My heart, rebuild from the start
Disgusting
Even if I somehow find a way to feel alive
I
Realized in my last life
That I hate the light
So I keep running
And running
I'm trying to hide
So maybe in my next life
I'll finally find
Find a way to wash away all the shame
To erase and wash away all the shame
Hyyype
Hella HYPEEEEEEEE
I'm lower than the dirt a worthless humunculus
The hype is real
@@mythicchris no trickle I'm sorry 😭😭😭😭please don't throw me in a blender with chainsaws and fog guts please don't do it ｡･ﾟﾟ*(>д
I doubt you'll see this, and I hope it doesn't come off as oversharing from some random person on the internet, but I'm a Christian who struggles with religious trauma+scrupulosity themed OCD and this song really speaks to me. The panic, the fear, the uncertainty, the pressure, the desperate grasping at straws that comes with this disorder that attacks everything that means the most to me - this song resonates with me, a lot. Lyrics aside even, the frantic pace mimics what it feels like inside my head. Chaos with moments of clarity.
I don't know where I'm going with this, but thank you for making it. Even though what I'm dealing with isn't what your song is about it makes me feel understood. It helps somehow. Legitimately, I was starting have an episode and I came here and now I think I feel ok.
While quite a lot of modern Christian music only wants to focus on the happy nice warm-fuzzy side of life......this feels real and relatable. Thank you.
That's exactly what my song is about :)
I wrote this song with many different thoughts and feelings in mind but, as an artist, what I hoped to accomplish was to let people who have felt this way feel heard. To let them know that as hard life is, things can be okay. You're not alone.
And most importantly, that the Lord loves those who call upon Him and lean upon Him for strength.
I'm happy that you made your voice heard to me. I used to struggle with trauma and still OCD as well, haha! Reading your words touched my heart.
I will be praying for you to find peace!
Thank you so much for listening to my song. I'm so honored that it could mean so much to you 💙
@kuukuu381 Oh my gosh! We live different lives and have different stories but I can totally relate to having religious trauma and dealing with scrupulosity/religious OCD. It was like a bolt of lightning hit me when I started going to biblical counseling and my counselor sent me home with an article on Scrupulosity. My heart goes out to you and your struggle. My brain felt like it was filled with a multitude of thoughts switching at a fever pace. I eventually began to believe that God hated me and saw me only as a slave, but counseling taught me that God was the one who drowned all the cruel taskmasters in the red sea in the book of Exodus. Gosh, God has been so faithful to me, I can't even express it. I used to almost hate him; I was so cynical about him, and felt so so so abandoned and left to my own suffering. It was literally earthshattering when I realized I had not been abandoned and that he was guiding me in the midst of suffering.
Even as a Christian, I can relate this song to a lot more than my religion. I think everyone has a point in their life where they feel the need to change themselves to escape something, whether it be a wrong, the idea of who they were, or just to be different. It's a good song, great job Trickle.
a christian with a homestuck pfp? truly a rare sight
@@gxxthicflower I know. I've accepted the sin that is falling victim to the Huss
@@normalguy1729 respectable. have a good day
The "Disgusting!" and "I" at 3:00 are so good omfg can't stop replaying that section YOU REALLY NAILED IT WITH THIS ONE! LIKE, BOTH OF YOUR ORIGINAL SONGS ARE SO GREAT??? HOW?
LITERALLY WOKE UP AT 9 FOR THIS, NO REGRETS.
Those high notes? Perfection. The lyrics? *chef’s kiss* The animation? Amazing, perfect. I loved your voice throughout the entire thing, and the inspiration behind the song just makes it so much more meaningful. A huge step-up from Ghost Town, which was already great. Looking forward to more, can’t wait to see where this journey takes you!! 💙
gonna go translate those morse code messages…
@@Margarita__0 lmk what the result is please
@@usasianology I believe somebody else has translated the messages in the comments! You could go search for their comment. I’m mostly doing this for my own enjoyment, but I might share the results when I get to it
Literally no one:
Me: "Mafumafu, is that you?"
Haha, MafuMafu is a big inspiration to me, thank you ^^
I went back to your old original song and god, I’m so excited to see how you’ll top that up!
Please don’t eat me I swear I’m subbed lol
Edit: Aghhh I don’t wanna edit because of the heart but I need to express my gratitude and joy at this song! Never thought it’d be inspired by some verses, but it’s great nevertheless! I like the inclusion of Morse code, and some of the lower parts, it really touched me for some parts! We love you Trickle man, thx for the vocals and thanks for Venz and Tikaal too! (I’ll check later for spelling errors)
You have been spared ^^
As a trans person who switched around multiple religions before realizing and accepting that religion just isn’t the thing for me, and that’s fine, this song actually resonated with me a lot!!! I may not be religious but religion is such an interesting thing for me and I love studying it and I respect everyone’s beliefs as long as they don’t harm others in the name of their religion
tfw you know it’s already gonna be a banger, congrats Trickle on 500k abs deserved 🎉🎉
EDIT: I MEANT 50K BUT I know I’m going to be typing that 500k fr for soon
500K HDLWBDKCKSN I WISH!!!
Hahahaha, thank you so much though!!
@@Trickle_Official You'll get there one day, albeit it is a slow start, your covers/songs deserve more than 500k. I'll be here every upload to cheer you on!
YESSSSS, JUST KEEP TRYING
@@Trickle_Official OOPS 50K BUT YEAH I KNOW U’LL GET THERE
@@Trickle_Official You'll get there one day, I am sure of it
1:24 sound design is CRAZY good; the pottery (mask) breaks and the singing and art changes to something more personal!! I love when metaphors come to life like this :DD
The visual art is amazing! At the beginning the focus is the yellow pottery, a mask, that overshadows the dark wolf but when yellow disappears we full recognize the person, body and mind
And the same thing happens with the singing too! At the very beginning the singing and music is clear and clean, but as the song continues the tempo increases giving that feeling of unraveling.
I love the parallelism of this song, and every different interpretation of it
This comment made my day, thank you 💙
It actually makes so much more sense interpreting the pottery and stuff as a mask. I felt like it meant something but wasn't sure what and like there's literally a brick wall, like a facade. A facade.
Thank you for your wonderful songs. I've been listening to your music for awhile now, and you always provide such a beautiful performance. This original song of yours was no different. ♥️ Please continue to do what you do.
Thank you so much!! This is the first time I've ever had a donation through a comment, too, what a huge honor for me, thank you!!!
Here to put out some idea on what the lyrics may mean. This is my first time trying to break down an entire song AAA
I have a strong feeling that this song represents suppressing an identity that is looked down upon by society or a religion. This song comes from a 1st person’s point of view, the singer. They are often seen going up against others in the video. The others in this video are either the singer themself(ves), greyed out figures, or the wolf, which also may be a metaphor for the singer fighting themself in this video. I will be using *peer(s)* instead of society, but it can very well be society.
Also love this song so much I have played it a million times already
What an incredible, incredibly well-thought-out analysis here! What a pleasure it was to read through this! Interesting interpretations here, I'm honored that my song can mean so much to so many 💙
@@Trickle_Official i really do love this song! Its why I tried breaking it down. The visuals and lyrics are so remarkables genuine as well. Thank you to the team for making this masterpiece that only comes around once in a blue moon!
So could it technically become a loop because of the end and the beginning part of the song?
@@ReiSuzuyaXIII yup, it can absolutely be a loop because the singer carries on to their next life
THE PREVIEW IS ALREADY SO GOOD OMG
Im not sure if this was intentional or not but with the imagery of the clay and the lyrics "I realized in my past life, I hate the light; So I keep running and running, I'm trying to hide" might be an accidental play with how clay is typically "fired" or cooked through a kiln (aka an oven made for cooking clay) which produces a light. So by constantly keeping himself (the character or Homunculus) in a bisque-ware state (aka a non cooked state) he can continuously reshape who he is and try to become someone "good enough" as once a piece is put in the kiln and fired, it cannot be changed. (unless you like cook another piece and hot glue it on)
either way this song is SOOOOO cool !!!!! very excited for what else you make trickle, I'm super excited to hear ur next original whenever it may be !!!! ^_^
Another point of interest is that the sheep (which I believe is meant to represent Jesus, or perhaps simply faith), is not only fired but also glazed with a beautiful pattern, probably meant to represent how God is already perfected.
@@TheDragonCat99 It could also symbolise how obsessive, blind Faith shapes people and makes them impenetrable to change, just like you can't change clay that has been cooked, and even if you break it, if it has been glazed, the patterns will look off if you glue it to something else or in a different pattern. Coincidently the imagery of the sheep is also associated with christianity and blind faith in general, describing religious people as the sheeps of god, as in their follower, and being a sheep, as in they do what they are told without questioning. The sheep beating the wolf, which could be a representation of freedom or personal identity and instinct, shows how religion tend to go after the people that doesn't think the same in a more than violent way, as seen countless time through history and even in current events. Religion will attack these contrary thought through indoctrination and outside judgement, while in the end the animation shows the wold devouring the head of the "Homunculus" and becoming its head, showing how they now embrace their "unholy" thoughts or that their true self won in a way.
@@kanamo6181 Great analysis! It’s crazy how many different interpretations there are of this one video.
WOW I WAS BLOWN AWAY, the MV was absolutely amazingly done props to Venz, the instrumental I love so much it surpassed my expectations by large from the preview. Finally the lyrics and vocals were amazing too of course, everything was so good thank you Trickle!
Edit: Just wanted to emphasize just how hard the instrumental goes god it’s so good!
Im getting major Eve vibes from this - PERFECTION
yay
the transgenders and bitches with body dysmorphia getting rambunctious on this beat:
real AF!
frfr less go
>mfw you turn your suffering into a fucking party
I just want to say thank you for what you do, over a year ago now I asked Jesus to come into my heart, and before I made that decision, reading your Google Doc in the description really helped and assured me that it was the right decision, and that Jesus IS kind (I believed a lot of things that said otherwise). thank you :)
This absolutely made my day, thank you so much for your kind comment!! I completely understand, I once thought so much contrary to what Scripture teaches us about the love of God... God is so good, that even though I used to hate Him based on false allegations, He showed me love, mercy, and grace. God is so good, and it's such a joy to share that good news with others! I hope that you have many wonderful days to come and that you remember that even on the tough days, the Lord is with you and is growing your faith with each trial as you see that God always provides 💙
Much love and peace to you, my friend! Thank you for the encouragement!!
Damn how you keep pumping these out I'm being honest. It seems you make like 1 cover per month. That's quite fast ngl.
This one is an original song :)
@@Trickle_Official Even more insane. Having this done inbetween all the covers, in almost the same amount of time? jeez dude. And for such a banger too!
@@Trickle_Official I am aware it's just that you still make so much in so little time.
@@Trickle_Official ok I have analysised the instrumental.
Oh God.
HOW IS IT SO GOOD.
Anyways I appreciate this one being longer.
Ghost town was so good for how short it is.
being a trans man, these lyrics are violently bittersweet. I love the manic sound of the instrumental and your vocals seem desperate to get your point across. very special song, thank you for creating and sharing!!
My thoughts on the song are that the clay-headed guy (I'll just call him Clay) is an avatar for the dark figure (Not sure what to call him but he'll just be the dark figure guy) who appears at 1:16. Clay is the outward personality that's shown to others as he has very animated personality and expressions. On the other hand, the dark figure is his inward personality, who never shows his head and is very motionless compared to Clay. The dark figure changes himself whenever he feels like he's not good enough by remolding Clay's face. This is seen here at 1:14 where he slaps Clay's face to remold him after he decides to change again. I'm not sure who the sheep/lamb character represents (1:41 and 1:54), but I know Trickle says that he based this song on the Gospel of the Bible, so maybe there's a connection there? Also, I assumed the wolf character was the dark figure's persona?? Idk.
This is a really rough idea, and I decided to work on this instead of doing my homework lol. Feel free to add your thoughts! Also, congrats on 50k Trickle! I can't wait to hear more of your work!
The lamb maybe is the part of him that want to have control of his personality, and want to change accordingly to the bible
So the lamb and the wolf are constant in fight to see who will be controling the body
I love your interpretation of Clay as an avatar. I think this song embodies a struggle we all go through, but is especially difficult for people with anxiety and depression. The use of creativity and clay holds a potential double-meaning because many artists express struggling in a similar fashion; people who shape their craft AND themselves in hopes of making value in both.
I think the lamb represents a moral paradigm. Based on the song's influence, this could easily be attributed to religious dogma, but it can retain its symbolism even a secular framing if you choose to view the wolf as the id and the lamb as the super-ego. Coming from an agnostic/atheistic perspective, I feel the secular interpretation has a more complex impact. If you take the lamb as dogma, it already holds the champion's corner; it's painted as axiomatically correct, and any opposition to it is simply an antagonist. However, the super-ego is simply the sense of obligations and standards we feel based on our culture and upbringing, as well as a big contribution to our sense of shame, which is a big theme in the lyrics.
I feel like the animation better reflects the latter in Clay's expressions when they watch the two fight. There's worry and uncertainty, eyes darting between them both. Even when the lamb is victorious, it's presented with a red vignette in an ominous manner, indicating that neither of the two winning is objectively good. Even if many of Freud's psychological theories didn't hold much water, the id and super-ego tell a story we can all relate to, regardless of our creed. We all need to balance ourselves between our desires and our morals, and it's terribly difficult.
There is an interesting irony when this song is interpreted in a more secular light: Although religious dogma of all kinds has been a powerful tool for helping humanity solve its internal struggles since time immemorial, Clay's maker is struggling with internalized values, shame and self-loathing, and those things arise from a sense of morality. A creature that thinks only with their drives and instincts would not know shame... So, in a way, the entire struggle Clay is going through is what happens when lamb wins and shame reigns.
I'm aware my metaphor has some weaknesses in it, particularly in that the "wolf as id" would not be the one speaking doubts to Clay's maker. A "wolf as doubt" vs. "lamb as faith" metaphor would reflect that better, but the song is primarily about the internal struggles and self-valuing of Clay's maker, rather than faith, so I'm not sure a simple metaphor will work for the lamb and wolf in this case.
I myself am atheist, but I can still enjoy this music with my own meaning. To me it reminds me of my own body dysphoria and coming to terms with it and understand I will in time be able to change myself, I just must be patient
THIS IS INCREDIBLE!!! Trickle you've gone above and beyond this time. This was so worth the wait and I can't wait to see what original song you'll release next!!! Also Venz did an incredible job on the MV it's seriously such goals.
(Also your vocal range.... stop flexing so much, man... I'm jealous)
Give me your voice and we'll call it even 🤝
Micchi!
As a trans person, this song ressonates with me to a spiritual level. Not only that, its an absolute bop, so I can put this song in both my feels and hype playlist.
I knew ai wasn’t the only one who saw this as a trans allegory
SAME
@@thekidontheinternet6178ONGG
This is, and i'm not kidding, the BEST song I've ever listened to. I just can't describe the amount of passion put into it. If every original song Trickle makes is gonna be like this one, I don't know if my heart can take it.😅
Everyone's talking about religion and I on the other hand see the depression hidden behind masks of fake excitement and joy, working with fast and energetic melody almost distracting from the dark lyrics. Which is neat.
I guess everyone sees this through the lens of their life.
Listened and fell in love immediately! The beat and erratic tone reminded me of a modern anime opening or a vocaloid song but it plays out so smoothly in the English language. Then I realized you did anime covers and it all made sense! They are just as smooth!! They feel like they could have been originally written in English. I’ve listened to good covers but the translations always sounded a bit off… They’re good BUT yours are GOOD!!! You’ve got insane skills.
Thank you so so much!! This comment made my day 😭💙
MY God, that entire final part of the song is literal perfection jeez. How can your voice, like, do all of that??
Hahaha, thank you so much!
Lots of practice 💙
Man. This really feels close to home feeling a lot like how my self loathing is. Hating yourself for that long but being almost oblivious to it till it really gets bad. Wanting to change yourself but either being too lazy, or just not good enough for yourself.
This song is great, man. Always trying to change yourself and ignore the monster inside of you that beats you down constantly. It never being good enough because you’re just rejecting who you are, and then finally coming to terms with who you are and embracing that part of yourself that you’ve always been ashamed of. That’s what I got from this song, and I love it.
This is great, I personally cannot find anything ugly about it - there's something very beautiful and heart-wrenching about trying to escape the shame and weight of mortal existence... thank you for another wonderful original!!! 🤍
I just find your channel and your songs, and after listening to this particular one, I have to say
Your vocal range could be used as a weapon, it's crazy, you're crazy for writing this amazing song, I love it, I love what you're doing
Keep it up until you can, best wishes from Hungary
Wow, thank you so so much! May God bless you, my friend!
Thank you for your kind words and thank you for watching 💙
Oh my God? This song rules big time. The instrumental (the amount of different instruments and genres), the lyrics and the singing (the imagery and the message), the music video (the quality and variety of the art)? They all compliment each other so neatly and make a great picture together that transmits a lot of emotion. I'm genuinely impressed by the quality of this track. Props to the team who worked on it and congrats on the 50k subs!
(Oh and love the fact it's inspired by the Gospel too; damn, it worked *so* well)
to me this song feels transgender in like a mad scientist sorta way /pos
this is so real
With the way how you sang this, I can feel the emotion that you really want to deliver the message of "not living up to your own expectations no matter how good you want to be", and it wins me the most that you were able to convey those emotions!
CAN'T WAIT TO HEAR MORE FROM YOUR ORIGINALS IN THE FUTURE!
The totally cis urge to call this a trans allegory
THATS WHAT IVE BEEN SAYIN
bruh
I had this on my recommended on my Spotify and I just "woah this one is nice. I'll favorite it."
and then two seconds later I find this video.
my phone is spying on me.
👁👁
@@Trickle_Official your song makes my Spotify playlist less boring thank you 👑
@@BabyExterminator Thank YOU for watching and listening!!
Do you happen to have a policy on animators using your music?
Not at all! I'd love for them to!! I only ask to be credited ^^
@@Trickle_Official Alright, thank you for the response!
BRUH THIS IS SOO GOOD-
Tbh it reminds me a lot of Miyashita Yuu’s songs…
Also, you have no idea how much I want to cover this, but I know that I can’t go as high as you can, and that I wouldn’t do the song justice…
You can do it!! Take it down if you need ^^
It would be so cool to see a cover!
*오/의역 많음
I realized in my last life
난 최후에서 깨달았다
That I hate the light
내가 빛을 싫어한다는 것을
So I keep running
그래서 계속 뛰고
And running
또 달려
I'm trying to hide
숨기려 하고있어
From everything that's inside
안에 있는 모든것들로부터
This heart that I've tried
노력한 이 마음
To erase and wash away all the shame
모든 수치를 지우고 씻어내기 위해
Scared to death of what's within
안에 있는 것을 죽도록 두려워해
There's bleeding kind of beating, deep beneath the skin
피를 흘리는 듯한 고동이 있어, 피부 깊숙히
Feel the rattle, ravage, all my sin
덜걱거림, 황폐함, 내 모든 죄를 느껴봐
Hear it scream behind my chest again
내 가슴 속 비명을 다시 들어봐
No alchemy can give me what I wish I could be
어떤 연금술도 내가 되고싶은 걸 이뤄줄 수 없어
So I'll try a different body
그러니 다른 몸을 시도해볼게
Just a dash of this and that
이것저것 조금만
A touch of blood and add some mud
약간의 피와 진흙을 더해
My wishes, fears, and painful tears
내 소원도, 두려움도, 고통스런 눈물도
I wonder when I'll have enough
언제쯤이면 충분할까
No form of love can give me what I wish I could be
어떤 형태의 사랑도 내가 되고싶은 걸 이뤄줄 수 없어
I pray just change me
기도해, 그저 날 변하게 해주길
I'm broken, torn, and tattered
부서지고, 찢어지고, 너덜너덜해졌어
I'll never be full again
난 다신 충분해질 수 없을거야
I'll close my eyes and shatter
눈을 감고 부숴버릴게
My heart, rebuild from the start
내 마음, 처음부터 다시 시작하는거야
Disgusting
역겹군
Even if I somehow find a way to feel alive
어떻게든 살아있다 느낄 방법을 찾아도
I
난
Realized in my last life
난 최후에서 깨달았다
That I hate the light
내가 빛을 싫어한다는 것을
So I keep running
그래서 계속 뛰고
And running
또 달려
I'm trying to hide
숨기려 하고있어
From everything that's inside
안에있는 모든 것들로부터
This heart that I've tried
노력한 이 마음
To erase and wash away all the shame
모든 수치를 지우고 씻어내기 위해
To erase and wash away all the shame
모든 수치를 지우고 씻어내기 위해
Stuck in the mud in my mind, if I clean up, I swear that I'd shine
내 마음 속 진흙에 갇혀, 이 모든 걸 씻어내면 다시 빛나리라 약속할게
I am confined to what is inside
내면에 틀어박혀있어
Eating away at the thoughts that I'm trying to hide
숨기려는 마음을 좀먹고
And I'm sick of all this wondering if I even deserve to live
모든 것이 지겨워. 내가 살 자격이 있을까
I think it's best I rip these feeling out with the rest of it
이 감정도 다른 것들과 함께 버리는게 좋겠지
The breath of life was my demise
생명의 숨결은 내게 죽음이었다
I'm cursed until the day I die
죽는 날까지 저주받고 있어
Perhaps a better set of eyes
아마도 더 나은 관점이
Will blind me from this sin of mine
나의 이 죄에서 눈멀게 해주겠지
I've been forsaken, I'm breaking, can take it again
난 버림받고, 부셔졌지만, 다시 붙잡을 수 있어
So take from me my mind and let me be
그러니 내 마음을 빼앗고 날 존재하게 해줘
I'm lower than the dirt
먼지만도 못 한 난
A worthless Homunculus
무가치한 호문클루스
Sick of this
지그지긋해
Even if I somehow find a way to feel alive
어떻게든 살아있다 느낄 방법을 찾는다해도
I
난
Realized in my last life
난 최후에서 깨달았다
That I hate the light
내가 빛을 싫어한다는 것을
So I keep running
그래서 계속 뛰고
And running
또 달려
I'm trying to hide
숨기려 하고있어
From everything that's inside
안에 있는 모든것들로 부터
This heart that I've tried
노력한 이 마음
To erase and wash away all the shame
모든 수치를 지우고 씻어내기 위해
To erase and wash away all the shame
모든 수치를 지우고 씻어내기 위해
Toil all day, till this rotten clay
하루종일 썩은 진흙이 될 때까지
Water and blood just aren't enough
물과 피만으로는 충분하지 않아
To fill my heart up
내 마음을 채우기 위해선
Over and over I try to reshape
몇 번이고 몇 번이고 다시 모양을 바꾸려 해
Crying in shame as I take the pain out
고통을 내보이며 수치에 울어
Maybe that can change me
어쩌면 그게 날 바꿀지도 모르지
That can save me
그게 날 구할 수 있어
I'm broken, torn, and tattered
난 부서지고, 찢어지고, 너덜너덜해졌어
I'll never be full again
난 다신 충분해질 수 없겠지
I'll close my eyes and shatter
눈을 감고 부숴버릴게
My heart, rebuild from the start
내 마음, 처음부터 다시 만드는거야
Disgusting
역겁군
Even if I somehow find a way to feel alive
어떻게든 살아있다 느낄 방법을 찾는다 해도
I
난
Realized in my last life
난 최후에서 깨달았다
That I hate the light
내가 빛을 싫어한다는 것을
So I keep running
그래서 계속 뛰고
And running
또 달려
I'm trying to hide
숨기려 하고있어
So maybe in my next life
그러니 아마 다음생에선
I'll finally find
찾아낼 수 있을거야
Find a way to wash away all the shame
모든 수치를 지우고 씻어낼 방법을
To erase and wash away all the shame
모든 수치를 지우고 씻어내기 위해
Korean lyrics. There are liberal translations
한국어 가사. 의역 있음
===
I realized in my last life that I hate the light
전생에 내가 불빛을 싫어한단 걸 깨달았어
So I keep running and running, I'm trying to hide
그래서 계속 달리고 달려서 숨으려고 해
From everything that's inside, this heart that I've tried
내면의 모든 것에 노력하던 내 마음
To erase and wash away all the shame
부끄러움을 모두 지우고 씻어내리라
Scared to death of what's within
안에 있는 무언가가 죽을까 두려워
There's a bleeding kind of beating, deep beneath the skin
피 흘리며 고동치는 게 있어 살 아래 깊숙한 곳에
The rattle, ravage, all my sin
달그락, 파괴해, 내 모든 죄를
Hear it scream behind my chest again
가슴 뒤의 비명을 다시 들어
No alchemy can give me what I wish I could be
연금술로 뭘 하든 내가 되고 싶은 건 얻지 못해
So I'll try a different body!
그러니 다른 몸을 써보려고 해!
Just a dash of this and that. A touch of blood and add some mud
그냥 이것저것 조금씩. 피 몇 방울과 진흙 조금을 넣어
My wishes, fears, and painful tears. I wonder when I'll have enough
내 바람과 두려움, 아픔의 눈물. 언제쯤 괜찮게 얻을 수 있을까
No form of love can give me what I wish I could be
사랑을 어떻게 하든 내가 되고 싶은 건 얻지 못해
I'll pray just change me!
날 바꿔주길 바라!
I'm broken, torn, and tattered
난 깨지고 찢어지고 망가져
I'll never be full again
다시는 차오르지 못할 거야
I'll close my eyes and shatter
눈을 감고 깨부술 거야
My heart, rebuild from the start
내 마음을, 처음부터 새로 만들어
Disgusting!
끔찍해!
Even if I somehow find a way to feel alive,
어떻게든 살아있단 느낌을 받을 방법을 찾더라도,
I....
난....
Realized in my last life that I hate the light
전생에 내가 불빛을 싫어한단 걸 깨달았어
So I keep running and running, I'm trying to hide
그래서 계속 달리고 달려서 숨으려고 해
From everything that's inside, this heart that I've tried
내면의 모든 것에 노력하던 내 마음
To erase and wash away all the shame!
부끄러움을 모두 지우고 씻어내리라!
To erase and wash away all the shame!!!
부끄러움을 모두 지우고 씻어내리라!!!
Stuck in the mud in my mind, If I clean it up, I swear that I'd shine
마음속 진흙에 갇혔어, 진흙을 치워내면, 그래 난 빛날 거야
I am confined to what is inside
내면의 무언가에 꽉 막혔어
Eating away at the thoughts that I'm trying to hide
숨기려 하는 생각을 천천히 갉아먹고 있어
And I'm sick of all this wondering if I even deserve to feel alive
또 살아있단 느낌을 받아도 되는지 의심하기도 질렸어
I think it's best I rip these feelings out with the rest of it
이 감정을 나머지 감정과 함께 찢어내는 게 최선이겠지
The breath of life was my demise, I'm cursed until the day I die
생명의 숨결은 내 종말이었지 난 죽는 그날까지 저주받았어
Perhaps a better set of eyes will blind me from this sin of mine
관점만 나아진다면 내 죄가 안 보일지 몰라
I've been forsaken, I'm breakin', can't take it again
난 버림받았어, 부서지고 있어, 다시는 견딜 수 없어
So peel from me my mind and let me be
그러니 마음속에서 벗어나게 해줘
I'm lower than the dirt
난 티끌보다 못해
A worthless homunculus
쓸모없는 호문쿨루스
Sick of this!
지긋지긋해!
Even if I somehow find a way to feel alive,
어떻게든 살아있단 느낌을 받을 방법을 찾더라도,
I....
난....
Realized in my last life that I hate the light
전생에 내가 불빛을 싫어한단 걸 깨달았어
So I keep running and running, I'm trying to hide
그래서 계속 달리고 달려서 숨으려고 해
From everything that's inside, this heart that I've tried
내면의 모든 것에 노력하던 내 마음
To erase and wash away all the shame!
부끄러움을 모두 지우고 씻어내리라!
To erase and wash away all the shame!!!
부끄러움을 모두 지우고 씻어내리라!!!
Toil all day, till this rotten clay
온종일 썩은 점토를 갈아엎어
Water and blood just aren't enough
물과 피만으론 충분치 않아
To fill my heart up
내 심장을 채우려면
Over and over, I try to reshape
계속하고 계속해서 다시 고쳐내곤
Crying in shame as I take the pain out
고통을 빼내며 부끄러워 울었지
Maybe...
어쩌면...
That can change me
그게 날 바꿀지도 몰라
That can save me
그게 날 지킬지도 몰라
I'm broken, torn, and tattered
난 깨지고 찢어지고 망가져
I'll never be full again
다시는 차오르지 못할 거야
I'll close my eyes and shatter
눈을 감고 깨부술 거야
My heart, rebuild from the start
내 마음을, 처음부터 새로 만들어
Disgusting!
끔찍해!
Even if I somehow find a way to feel alive,
어떻게든 살아있단 느낌을 받을 방법을 찾더라도,
I....
난....
Realized in my last life that I hate the light
전생에 내가 불빛을 싫어한단 걸 깨달았어
So I keep running and running, I'm trying to hide
그래서 계속 달리고 달려서 숨으려고 해
So maybe in my next life, I'll finally find
다음 삶에서라면 끝내 찾아낼 거야
Find a way to wash away all the shame!
부끄러움을 모두 씻어낼 방법을 찾으리라!
To erase and wash away all the shame!!!
부끄러움을 모두 지우고 씻어내리라!!!
The way the legs tangle like streamers on the bike 😆 . You can really feel the emotions in this song, was worried that your voice was gonna get strained at the high notes.
This seems like human vocals, but in the tags it specifically says "#vocaloid"
did you use some sort of vsynth / _are just extremely good at tuning?_ (if this is a tuning job, then WOW, this is amazing) or was it tagged as vocaloid because you mainly do vocaloid covers??
just curious, great song btw!
I just tagged vocaloid because I want to appeal to vocaloid fans with my style of music ^^
It's my voice, I'm not a vocaloid haha!
Thanks for watching, and good question!!
This looks like one of those music video animations you make in your head while listening to a song except it actually exists
I’m autistic and to say I struggle to make friends is an understatement. The amount of times I’ve completely destroyed and reconstructed myself in hopes that I’ll be wanted this time is almost un fathomable. This song really resonates with me for that reason. I’m also Christian so that adds a nice layer to it as well.
This so awesome, buddy! I could really feel the emotion in it so well and the interpretations I can actually apply to my own life so well, and this honestly makes this more personal to me, and I appreciate that. Being able to find common ground with the music you listen to can be so revealing and can sometimes help you to understand more about yourself, and imo, this truly has done that for me. So, thank you, Trickle. For being an awesome artist, and an awesome friend. ✊❤️🙏
A homunculus in 16th century folklore, is a clay humanoid creature made by a master, to do what they say, to be what the master says. A homunculus in nowadays vocabulary, is a very small person.
This could implies that the yellow dog creature, aka Limon, and the dark wolf creature, Shadow. Limon is a person who feels the need to hide away due to his own shadow, Shadow. Shadow is his dark thoughts eating him from the inside out. Shadow wants to meld Limon to his disire, like how Limon’s look on society is, and bend it to a way that society wants
Also great job bro!
I’m so hype!!!!!!!!!! I CANT WAIT!!! ANOTHER TRICKLE ORIGINAL!!! Congrats on 50k you deserve all the subs and more!!! Can’t wait to see you grow further in your artistic/singing abilities and in your following!! 👏👏👏🥳🥳🥳
Idk why, but the first time I've heard this, i wasn't thinking about a Christian song but more like a song about someone who isn't ok with their body and personality, and they tried everything to change it without success cuz they were still feeling the shame about this body (some kind of social anxiety). And so they hope that when they die and hopefully reborn, they have a better body than this one (and the previous ones that they also didn't like)
This is such a comforting song in not only its lyrics, but also its style. It's so clearly inspired by the likes of Eve and ADO, but it also feels distinctly yours in a way that makes it always feel like coming home to a warm house in winter
This one took me a while to listen to because life hit me like a truck, but I can always trust your music to cheer me up :)
This song would be a perfect Omori anime opening
The chorus is so high and intense. This MV is also actually insane. You're so pro and I'm so inspired. The little morse messages ugh. So stunning so showstopping. Trickle MV2 was a smash dude
Trickle, this was inspired. The mixing is so perfect - as an aspiring musician myself I nearly teared up. It's so obviously inspired, and god, you're one of the best singers I've encountered who sings in this genre. This is up there with Ado and E ve, to me. I wish you the absolute BEST of luck on your future music career, god knows I'll be adding this to my playlist!! :)
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I HAVE BEEN LISTENING TO THIS SONG FOR MONTHS THINKING THAT IT WAS A ENG COVER OF A VOCALOID SONG ONLY TO FIND OUT IT'S AN ORIGINAL???
im a Muslim, but DAMN I NEVER KNEW A CHRISTIANS COULD MAKE THESE BANGERS! (also um im late, don’t mind it lol)
is this vocaloid or is it you singing??? there’s so much emotion for a vocaloid but the singing is so perfectly hitting the notes its almost inhuman 😅 by god, if that really is your voice you are INCREDIBLE.
This is so sweet, thank you SO much😭💙
It's my voice! I couldn't even begin to have the patience for using a Vocaloid 💀
My comment is a bit late, however I just have to say that I listen to this song every day, multiple times a day. Whilst I'm not religious and see the song in a different way to Trickle's meaning, the lyrics are so well formed and not to mention the insane range of vocals. Even now I still get tingles whenever I listen to it. Very well done, you don't understand how much this song means to me in the grand scheme of things
I'm a bit late to this video but I really enjoy this song and the gorgeous visuals that Venz has crafted for it. Many of the lyrics call out towards me as an autistic trans-man who suffers from several mental and physical health issues. Your voice sings the lyrics out loud magnificently and I wish you all the success in your future singing endeavors Trickle!
This song is so cool! I interpret it as a trans person trying to deal with internalized transphobia, how they're realizing that they're not the same gender as the one they were born with and trying to deal with it even though subconsciously they don't acceot themself. They keep changing their identity and gender trying to find one that just fits and one that they feel comfy with even though for as long as their subconscious doesn't accept the fact theyre not cis they'll never be comfy with who they are, but they can't figure out why they're so unaccepting of themself so they're just stuck in this cycle of questioning themself and never feeling comfy in any one gender. Washing away the shame in this case is literal as for a reason they can't find they're ashamed of their own identity no matter what they choose. They keep switching bodies, like switching how they present, trying to figure themself out. "I'm broken torn and tattered" would refer to how their identity at this point is everywhere and they feel like they know nothing about themself. "My heart, rebuild from the start" would refer to every time they change labels. The... Bridge? The slower bit in the middle starting with "toil all day till this rotten clay" refers to how they feel just so tired about constantly changing, and that theyve tried so many things and nothing works. "Crying in shame as i take the pain out" would be them taking the pain of being misgendered out by presenting as what they feel like but still feeling shameful about it. The morse code messages which are mostly insulting them is tehri subconscious, though they cant figure out why they feel so inferior and just so uncomfy with their own gender.
Same.
One year!!!!!!!! Been listening from time to time since it came out, Ghost Town was pretty good but omg this one-
Wow, one year!!!
New Original dropping in November 💙
I really wanna see you make more original songs! This sounds good, but I’m excited for the full thing!
I’ve heard the whole thing, and it sounds amazing. I love the visuals and the instrumental, and your voice even compliments it more.
Is this a long-form allegory for a transgender person’s struggles with gender dysphoria/imposter syndrome? I had already gotten the vibe for some time that Trickle might be a closeted trans girl who suppresses those feelings due to their strongly Christian beliefs/upbringing. I never commented on it before as I don’t want to be an armchair psychologist making assumptions based on nothing but suspicions, but the lyrics and messaging of this song make me strongly reconsider my pet theory.
I find myself coming back to this song again and again. I literally can't stay away from it, It's so good.
I swear you could make a kidz bop song sound good
One thing I love about songs is they’re always at least somewhat vague, and it leaves lots of room for interpretation. That’s part of the beauty of it. You made the songs with a biblical perspective, but for me, an atheist and a trans man, there’s a totally different feel.
All the talk about forms and changing one’s body is very relevant to someone stuck in a body not meant for them.
The lyrics about sin and shame reflect how, being in a religious and conservative family, I’m not accepted and of course I’m expected to feel shameful or repent for what they believe to be a sin.
And then of course there’s the lyrics that sound like someone with terrible mental health, which, hey, that’s me too.
I love this! This is absolutely amazing
Mans looks like a wobbledog, I love him
3:02 Not actually needed
but I thinks this is a Reference to "Mr.Dolly" a Sheep that was the first mammal cloned( and death long ago)
so maybe the main character want to start again,be successful like this sheep
Aw... I missed the premiere, but heard the song and you and Tikaal did an amazing song, mixing many things that I didn't expected and to worked really well, great job to both. Of course Venz movie skills are always amazing 😉👍
Thank you so much, Marvin!!
Hey, question, if by any chance i create a full length animated series, and in around 1 year the first ep comes out could i use this song as the opening?
That would be AWESOME!!! I'd be honored :D
@@Trickle_Official NICE
whats with songs about depressing topics from not so famous people being so good
First off let me say, this is my favorite song of all time, and i'm not even Christian. I just love the way you depicted the internal struggle of everything that was going on so well, it's honestly amazing
For me, this song reminds me of my depression, a constant feeling of self doubt and overall unenjoyment with life, but at the same time having to express myself and at the very least try to, build myself back up after all my past failures, ultimately losing a bit of who I am in the process, whether it was worth it or not is my choice. That is my take on Homunculus
But I'm sure I'm not the only one with a interpretation of this song, and that's what makes this song so perfect, it always seems to capture exactly how I feel in life, truly a work of art, thank you to everyone who worked on this, I love this song.
I feel like I've struck gold - it's so rare to find an openly Christian vocaloid fan, and you're so good at this!
_(I am losing my mind over the imagery of the lamb killing the wolf in this video-)_
I can't convey to you how encouraging it is to find another believer in the wilds of the internet.
Fantastic songs! I'll be praying for you!
1.5 MILL WOOOOO 🎉🎉🎉
日本味を感じたのは私だけか？
めっちゃかっこいいです。英語って声が基本的低いイメージですがそれを思いっきりぶち壊しにきた感じがしました。
Been listening to this song since it’s release and the final “erase and wash away all the shame” never fails to give me chills.
ive had the opposite experience with the christian gospel, but this song still greatly resonated with me before i read the description. though i regret reading it lol. as someone living a life without leaning the christian god myself, I can't really unsee your artistic intent in the imagery and lyrics. ended up reminding myself of the many times i was threatened with eternal damnation and such if i never repented.
not out of any distaste for you or your experiences, Im glad you found something that pulled you out of such a dark place, and that youre still here to share that experience at all.
So I guess ultimately im just personally venting due to bad experiences with the religion. Really appreciate that Homunculus is up to anyone's interpretation. And regardless of that, I still want to thank you for creating such a wonderful music video
My interpretation of this song and its animation shows that of a kid who’s suffering from domestic abuse, trying to “reshape” themselves to fit what the abuser wants them to be. However, it is never enough for them. The victim is missing something to fill themselves, which is why they still continue to reshape themselves despite the abuse, believing that if they reshape themselves in the image of the abuser’s desires, the abuser will give them the final piece they need.
However, that is just one interpretation.
Another way I interpret this as is that the ram is actually the bad guy. The green wolf, (previously mentioned as the abuser), is a part of the aforementioned victim that the ram continues to keep at bay from the victim, forcing the victim into a constant relapse where they will continue to try to find who they are until the wolf can reach them and make them whole.
Honestly I normally don't comment on videos, but I wanted to say, not only are the visuals astounding and inspiring, the music and the freedom of just how you created this song (alongside it being an original) is amazing, and thank you so much for sharing this with us! Such different interpretations of so many people to take, I'm glad I finally clicked and watched this, truly I adore this song, the the visuals truly encapsulate almost this raw feeling to them, it's amazing, thank you all for blessing my eyes with this (all who worked on this)!
HOLY SHIT THIS VOICE FEELS LIKE FINALLY REACHING TO SCRATCH AN ITCHY SPOT BUT ITS LIKE IN MY BRAIN?????
Hahahaha, thank you 🤣