Thanks for watching! Don't forget to get your free copy of the guide - 8 Parenting Phrases to Rethink & What to Say Instead: brightestbeginning.com/bb_optin/8-common-parenting-phrases-to-rethink/?lead_source=youtube_198
Thanks so much! I knew that I shouldn't say "you're okay", as you're right, in that moment, they aren't, because they just hurt themselves. I didn't realise I shouldn't be saying "use your words" though and that is definitely something I started saying recently. Your explanation makes a lot of sense though. I will try to validate and label their feelings instead of saying that phrase. My son is only 22 months old, so he still needs me to teach him what emotion he is feeling. When he cries, he doesn't know he's sad or frustrated etc. Thanks for the reminder! :)
I have been saying “you’re okay” whenever my 14 months old falls or trips and hurts himself. I didn’t know that was wrong 😢 now I know what is the right thing to say, thank you so much!!
You're so welcome! Also, don’t be hard on yourself-it's completely natural to want to comfort your little one in the moment and saying it a few times isn't wrong. Now that you know a different approach, you’re already taking steps to help your toddler feel understood and supported. You're doing an amazing job, and your awareness will make a big difference as your little one grows. 💕
My mom always said "you're okay" and I still feel uncomfortable sharing my feelings with her, also have difficulty managing relationships. This is so true. We can do better. I have a three year old son. I ask are you okay? Are you hurt and hold him till he is ready to get up. He doesn't stay down for long 😅
When my toddlers can't use their words, I ask them to show me or to point. This sometimes works and then I can label and say the phrase for them, for example "oh you wanted to eat peas for dinner". It's difficult to walk the fine line between rewarding good communication and not enabling bad behavior as they're quickly learning screaming gets them what they want.
Very timely video, we have been struggling here with our two year old. Toddler communication is already difficult enough without making it worse due to my own actions.
I would also emphasize our validation has to be genuine, or else the words just become empty felt. Nothing worse than hearing the right words, but feeling a sense of vague fakeness to it.
07:18 Because I said so'-guilty! 😅 This video really opened my eyes to how that phrase shuts down their curiosity and learning. From now on, I’ll make more of an effort to explain the 'why' behind my decisions. Thank you!
Thank you Emma! We've been loving your videos lately and its been super helpful - Have definitely noticed a big change in our bubbas development with little tweaks from watching these
I notice that I say, "You're alright, its okay." to my son a lot when he falls down/gets hurt, but usually I do check him and ask him IF he is okay, first, and hold him if he's crying and tell him, "Mommy's here, I got you." And then I have many times asked him to "use his words" when he's throwing a fit, but I have noticed that makes him get more frustrated, sometimes. So I started asking him questions when he's having a tantrum. I will say, "What's wrong, baby?" And he will sometimes calm down more and do his little toddler blabbers that I don't fully understand lol. Or I'll say, "Are you thirsty?" And if he is, he will say, "Yea, I Borsty"😂(just thought that was cute and wanted to share❤) or even "Are you Hungry?" And I rub my belly. If he is, he will say, "Yeah, I ungy." 😭💖 He HATES when I ask him if he's tired, though. He absolutely refuses to nap or sleep most of the time. 😭🤣 I'm trying to do better, and I appreciate this video a lot because I can utilize what you've said here and help him more. 🫶🏽🫶🏽🫶🏽🫶🏽
My mother always used, because i said so. Or if i asked why. She would just say. That's why. Which kind of lead me to create a behavior to always depend on others because, like my mother, they probably know best. Which only leads to getting used by people
When my baby falls or trips, he does not really cry so i tell him to get up, unless when he feels hurt after falling and cries i attend to him and try to understand where it hurts, he's 18 months old...
Thanks for watching! Don't forget to get your free copy of the guide - 8 Parenting Phrases to Rethink & What to Say Instead: brightestbeginning.com/bb_optin/8-common-parenting-phrases-to-rethink/?lead_source=youtube_198
Thanks so much! I knew that I shouldn't say "you're okay", as you're right, in that moment, they aren't, because they just hurt themselves.
I didn't realise I shouldn't be saying "use your words" though and that is definitely something I started saying recently. Your explanation makes a lot of sense though. I will try to validate and label their feelings instead of saying that phrase. My son is only 22 months old, so he still needs me to teach him what emotion he is feeling. When he cries, he doesn't know he's sad or frustrated etc. Thanks for the reminder! :)
It's my pleasure!
That awkward moment I learn about my own childhood instead of just doing better for my own baby 😅
I have been saying “you’re okay” whenever my 14 months old falls or trips and hurts himself. I didn’t know that was wrong 😢 now I know what is the right thing to say, thank you so much!!
You're so welcome!
Also, don’t be hard on yourself-it's completely natural to want to comfort your little one in the moment and saying it a few times isn't wrong.
Now that you know a different approach, you’re already taking steps to help your toddler feel understood and supported.
You're doing an amazing job, and your awareness will make a big difference as your little one grows. 💕
My mom always said "you're okay" and I still feel uncomfortable sharing my feelings with her, also have difficulty managing relationships. This is so true. We can do better. I have a three year old son. I ask are you okay? Are you hurt and hold him till he is ready to get up. He doesn't stay down for long 😅
❤
When my toddlers can't use their words, I ask them to show me or to point. This sometimes works and then I can label and say the phrase for them, for example "oh you wanted to eat peas for dinner". It's difficult to walk the fine line between rewarding good communication and not enabling bad behavior as they're quickly learning screaming gets them what they want.
Very timely video, we have been struggling here with our two year old. Toddler communication is already difficult enough without making it worse due to my own actions.
Thanks Emma. As a new parent raising two toddler, these lessons help us alot as parents.
It's my absolute pleasure!
I would also emphasize our validation has to be genuine, or else the words just become empty felt.
Nothing worse than hearing the right words, but feeling a sense of vague fakeness to it.
07:18 Because I said so'-guilty! 😅 This video really opened my eyes to how that phrase shuts down their curiosity and learning. From now on, I’ll make more of an effort to explain the 'why' behind my decisions. Thank you!
Thank you Emma! We've been loving your videos lately and its been super helpful - Have definitely noticed a big change in our bubbas development with little tweaks from watching these
It's my pleasure!
It is like you were in my house. Thank you so much for this video
😂No worries at all!
Being using "use your words" jokingly with my one month old 😅.
😂
😂😂😂
Genius Emma
Glad you liked it!
I notice that I say, "You're alright, its okay." to my son a lot when he falls down/gets hurt, but usually I do check him and ask him IF he is okay, first, and hold him if he's crying and tell him, "Mommy's here, I got you." And then I have many times asked him to "use his words" when he's throwing a fit, but I have noticed that makes him get more frustrated, sometimes. So I started asking him questions when he's having a tantrum. I will say, "What's wrong, baby?" And he will sometimes calm down more and do his little toddler blabbers that I don't fully understand lol. Or I'll say, "Are you thirsty?" And if he is, he will say, "Yea, I Borsty"😂(just thought that was cute and wanted to share❤) or even "Are you Hungry?" And I rub my belly. If he is, he will say, "Yeah, I ungy." 😭💖 He HATES when I ask him if he's tired, though. He absolutely refuses to nap or sleep most of the time. 😭🤣 I'm trying to do better, and I appreciate this video a lot because I can utilize what you've said here and help him more. 🫶🏽🫶🏽🫶🏽🫶🏽
“He absolutely refuses to sleep or to nap”
That’s my toddler. You can see in the eyes, she is very tired and sleepy, but she doesn’t want to sleep!
Thank you Emma
You’re welcome 😊
My mother always used, because i said so. Or if i asked why. She would just say. That's why. Which kind of lead me to create a behavior to always depend on others because, like my mother, they probably know best. Which only leads to getting used by people
When my baby falls or trips, he does not really cry so i tell him to get up, unless when he feels hurt after falling and cries i attend to him and try to understand where it hurts, he's 18 months old...
Hi mam my baby is 3 month old always sucking right hand and gacing head towards right side and sleeping is this normal pleae reply
Is good child rearing a category of good communication?
I'm sorry, - I'm not sure what you mean? Could you explain further?