Not all Crossdressers are sexually aroused by dressing. Some just enjoy the clothes, and getting to wear them. While it is perfectly common to feel sexy when you dress it doesn’t mean you are aroused.
I cross dress because it helps me relax from the day to day work I do. Female clothes are so much more comfortable to wear. I have been dong it for many years now and cannot see me stopping, I am 64 years old going on 65 and change into my female outfits every day after work, stress free evenings relaxing. Oh and yes all my work mates know and are supportive.
Exactly. Arousal might accompany it because you feel sexy, but really it's just something that makes me happy. I prefer feminine looks overall. I don't just wear skirts I also have tight jeans and transparent tops. I might even include an accessory like a crystal belt buckle.
@@VictorianMaid99 Yeah, it can be for cosplay as well, as people can't group all men who crossdress into the same category or motivation for crossdressing.
Just wanted to point out a very important detail about crossdressing. At second 15, Dr. Cannon says that "crossdressers are people who are sexually aroused by wearing women's clothing". The problem is, this only applies to a part of crossdressers. This is called a fetish and isn't a negative thing. Some men and women just get aroused by wearing very high heels. Another part of crossdressers are people who wear the clothing of the opposite gender because it makes them feel good and sexy. To more easily understand this, image a women wearing revealing clothing. She does this because it makes her feel good and confident about herself. She feels that that clothing accentuates the parts of her body she considers to be most desirable. Some crossdressing men do the same: using women's clothing, they put emphasis on their more feminine traits, because that is what makes them feel good and confident. To summarize, some men prefer to attract their partners by using their feminine traits rather than their masculine ones. Hope this makes a little bit more sense. If anyone has any questions, please post them. I'll try and answer them asap.
I had questions is there cross dress like femdom I means cross dress like dominate not like Humiliation because most of them cross dress wearing like Humiliation
but why are you happy breaking societal norms? males usually, 99.9% of the time, don't look good in female clothes, it's a weird kink to want to look like a clown...
For a lot of men it's not for arousal for me it's a bit of both it's for the comfort of the clothes and the arousal but every man is different in their reasoning for crossdressing but either way if you're a man who crossdresses feel comfortable in the reason why you do it.
@@PredatorKingdom crossdressing can or cannot be sexual. For Pete's Sake the Chinese think small feet is a huge turn on. Everyone is different across the what...2 billion people on EARTH.
@@VictorianMaid99 I think it's 7 billion, but yes, everyone is different and people get turned onto all types of different things. Even thing that we might think is weird, is something that turns on others.
I am a crossdresser and I do not get aroused by crossdressing. Dr. cannon is totally wrong, and does not know what he is talking about. Dr. Jenn you need to interview a crossdresser and ask the question why we dress, I can bet that sexual arousal will not be the answer.
recurring dreams of being a woman but don't feel the same in waking life. Yes its shameful as the dreams started at 16 and I never dared talk about it. Any ideas to get rid of the dreams?
Men may cross dress and women may cross dress, it’s just that it’s more acceptable for women to do it. Secondly, not all cross dressers wear clothes normally associated with the opposite gender for sexual gratification or arousal. So do, some don’t. Thirdly, depending on which study you read, approximately 10%/15% of the male population identify as gay or bisexual and the percentage of male cross dressers is the same. That means that 85%/90% of cross dressers identify as heterosexual or “straight “. There is one group where there is a much higher percentage of gay/bisexual men and that is in “drag” culture, which is really a separate group altogether. It is also generally accepted that the vast majority of male cross dressers do NOT think they are women or want to have SRS and live full-time as women. Cross dressing is often called the “last taboo” as it is often mistakenly considered a “perversion” or “kink” and proponents are regularly abused both verbally & physically.
This 'doctor' states that a cross dresser is [a man] who is aroused by wearing women's clothing. I have two problems with this. FIrstly, what is a woman who is aroused by wearing men's clothing? Secondly, there may well be some people who enjoy cross-dressing but their sexual 'orientation' is 'straight' (biologically male or female), AND there may well be people who enjoy cross-dressing but their sexual orientation is [for want of a better word] 'gay'. There are so many 'labels' in society that so-called 'doctors' like to categorize.
My Ex was a crossdresser. He promised it was a stage. I was working on trying to accept it but there were other issues because he was a narcissist as well. They say the narcissist has 2 faces but including his cross dressing persona, he had more than 2 faces. He was sweet when he dressed as a woman. Because he was also a narcissist I was put down for being closed minded and a Debbie downer. He was also into role reversal sexually. He liked to be the bottom. It all made me uncomfortable. I think in some relationships cross dressing may be acceptable but there has to be true love and no emotional abuse present.
@@serpenttay just be a good wife and be happy he'll change if you let him dress and keep him in panties 24\7 you'll have the control over him. Like why wouldn't you want a crossdresser for a husband
Hi Rachel, I'm Shreyasta. I think I'm facing a situation similar to yours. Is there any way I can get to talk to you? I really have many unanswered questions. I could use your insight. Let me know if you'd like to connect. I'll send you my Skype ID. Until then, have a good day.
My take on it fwiw is that if issues like narcissism or emotional abuse are involved it is not really about being a CD,even if it.manifests there. It is very,very easy when the window opens up so to speak,the floodgates opened, you have someone freed from the closet,etc,and they can forget about the spouse/partner. If hubby is spending a ton of money on dresses and shoes, going out every weekend and ignoring the family, etc that isn't good. Not really all that different then a spouse buying an expensive car when money is tight, or other such excesses. Two things are key here IMO, open communication and reasonable boundaries. Communicating means the CD talking about what they think they need, things like maybe asking for help from the spouse w buying warddrobe,makeup,etc ( or if spouse doesn't want to be involved,setting budgets for spending or cd getting makeup lessons from a pro),how involved the spouse is ( like going to a cd event together, etc). Reasonable boundaries are just that. A spouse saying he can dress once a year on Halloween is not setting reasonable boundaries or dictating them, they need to be negotiated, same way a cd saying ' I plan on going to cd conventions all over the country' is dictating ( among other things,the cost and time to do that). If a CD needs regular time to dress to be happy,rigidly setting it to 1vday a month by the spouse is wrong, but working out a compromise is fine,as long as both are okay with it, if not totally thrilled. One of the problems CDs face with spouses is that they are so grateful the spouse hasn't thrown them.out of the house they will take anything; for the spouse, I have seen CDs go overboard knowing that in some ways they have power over the spouse ( like where spouse is SAHM mom to young kids and financially dependent) to blow open the door. It requires honesty, too,for the CD to say what they want and the spouse to be honest about her feelings. It can be really hard,worse nightmare for many CDs spouses is their partner coming home one day and saying 'I want to be a woman' ( it isn't as common as some claim,most CDs are not trans, and even fewer if they are will admit to themselves they are IME,). Not saying it is easy, it can be really hard. One thing ai highly recommend is finding a counselor that is knowledgeable,not like these two in the video. These days thanks to the internet and the work counselors and professionals have done, there are people trained in issues around this out there, in this world of virtual sessions they don't even have to be local, you can use zoom or Skype. Crossdresser support sites often have links to people, not to mention therapists themselves advertise it on their website, do a web search of counseling services in your area and you are not unlikely to find one. Stay the heck away from clergy or religious counsellors,even ones from supposedly liberal backgrounds are usually really bad w issues like this. Two people I watch on you tube,heidiphox and xdressing with paola, are married and they have videos talking about their experiences w their spouses,there are others as well.
Im a athletic man who love to wear womens and mens clothes, its kind of like whatever, its all just fabric to cover up my body when in public, yes, i love to put on a barbie tennis outfit and go play tennis! So fun! And not in a sexual way, but just as a look.
i am straight male and only like girls.. but..i like to wear female clothes..but i am feeling depression and i dont know is it wrong or right..i am very confused and i dont have a person to share this..i feel lonely
I am a 38 year old woman, here's my two cents... I don't think it's wrong. You just need to do it in a way that is respectful to others and their boundaries. I suggest, if you are dating a girl and it becomes serious...sit her down and have a serious conversation about it. She might have questions. Try to answer them as honestly as possible. Most women think it's creepy or weird. Some women will make an exception to this, for a man they care about. Believe it or not, a minority of women actually find it a total turn on. Some don'ts : Don't just spring it on someone without warning. That's disrespectful as you don't know how that might affect them. Don't pressure someone into going along with it if they don't feel comfortable. If you go out in public, stick to places, times and events where children will not be present. Clubbing late on a Friday night is a good example of an appropriate time and place. Also, there is such a thing as propriety information. Not EVERYONE needs to know about it. Be discrete. However, you need to inform your partner as soon as things start getting serious. That's only fair.
There are support groups in most large cities for transgender people, which includes crossdressers. That would be a good place to start. They are just clothes, and wearing a skirt and/or some makeup isn't going to consign you to going to hell, despite what fundie christians want you to think. Most allow you to attend crossdressed, or not, as your circumstances require. Nearly all of them have some sort of online presence, google is your friend.
@@thebigcountry8518 it's not a man living his own life! It's a member of a team, whose choices and actions will have an indelible impact on someone (maybe multiple someone's) else's life.
@@henzsol6771 I wear a black kilt and tights everywhere I go during the fall and winter. I go to places with heavy foot traffic like coffee shops. I don't sneak around and try to hide from people. it's when you sneak around that people suspect something fishy is going on which is exactly why I don't do that. I'm very open and authentic about who I am. Does it take a lot of courage and carrying a can of Mace with you for security reasons? Yes. But I will not hide or stay in the dark. People appreciate honesty in all of its forms so long as it includes modesty and sensibility when assembling ones outfit. I don't even wear makeup.
Crossdressing is normal. Everybody who doesn't crossdress are repressed weirdos. Maybe the quack doctors ought to do a video on exploring why people don't wear what they want!! In societies where crossdressing is an every day fact, no one gets hung up about it.
Saying someone who doesn't crossdress is abnormal is like saying someone who does is abnormal. The judging is the problem,someone can be fine w crossdressers and not want to do it themselves. Heck their are transgender women who hate CDs,go figure.
@@ivarplavinskis4668 yeah that dates back to the idea when crossdressers were known as fetishistic transvestites, the asumption was it was a fetish ( the modern version is that idiot Bailey's aurigynophilia concept)
At age 12 I found moms lipstick, nobody was home so I went to the bathroom and tried to put it on. There was an explosion of sexual delight and an instant boner let loose. My Anima was there and she wasn't going away. It was that red lipstick the ladies wore in the 1950s. It made me fall in love with myself. I kept doing this "Shameful" thing all day. Oops! at last It would not rub off! That and I had to go to school the next day. Sheesh! my bullies were going to have a party on me. I could not believe it when nobody noticed it. True story!
This is pretty poorly done,for a number of reasons. First of all while there are crossdressers who get an erotic charge out of cd'ing,whether they get off on (to them,) being humiliated wearing women's clothing ( I am using men cd'ing bc quite honestly women can wear what they want, not a lot of reason to crossdress when they can put on men's pants,shirt and tie and ppl would think it was cute). Some CDs get dressed,get aroused and get off on that. Some when they dress get aroused bc they are in their femme personna and it is being in that personna that turns them on and they want to have sex as her (folks,just my opinions, not claiming truth here), it as varied. But a lot of CDs dress because it is an expression of themselves, an alter ego of sorts, and they aren't aroused by it pee se, though as in their male personna that doesn't mean they couldn't have sex,bit the arousal is not about the dressing itself. Many report it is calming,it is their better half,etc. Some CDs could be transgendered and for whatever reasons cannot transition, this is a way to be themselves at least part time. The guy when he said 6 yrs old is correct in that many CDs become interested in women's things when they are young, bit it isn't arousal. There is a while school of analysis going back to Freud that have these notions of early child sexuality, but I strongly doubt a 6 yr old dresses because they then get off,and any pleasure they get out of trying on women's things is likely it feels good in an innocent sense. I don't like blanket statements either,this is complex territory. Some of the CD groups for example go out of their way to say they are 'normal het men w a hobby', and are often viciously transphobic and anti gay,saying ',it has nothing to do w sex'. This is them trying to gain acceptence from ',normal' society,and it is bullshit, bc based on experience a lot of those 'normal' CDs when dressed are situationally bisexual ( ie when dressed can be attracted to men or women or fellow CDs). Been to plenty of TG clubs where admirers hang out and seen more than a few self proclaimed 'hets' go off to have fun w a guy or fellow cd. The real answer to the question is that CDing doesn't mean the person is gay or bi or transgendered or any one thing but that it is not abnormal or dangerous.
What do you mean "what causes it"?? it's nothing wrong. you can make your own choices in life. clothes are clothes it's society's fault that men can't wear girl clothes and girls can't wear men's clothes without getting negative reactions from the public.
@@JoeDirtisawsome women's pants are very very feminine, so a women wear pants isn't always a good comparison to a man wearing a pink dress, but I get whar you mean. In terms of studying women with masculine minds I think somebody somewhere must have looked into it at least a bit
Hey!? Can I have a clarification? but the misconception is that it has nothing to do with being transexual or being transgendered (seems to say that it does have something to do with being transexual or transgendered so I am confused about what he is actually saying...OH! wait a minute! I see! It is a misconception that it has anything to do with being transexual or transgender! think that is what he is saying - how he said this is not clear...I am going to ask and hope for an answer). Only he can clarify what he said in an inarticulate and casual way which he did several times!
That it has nothing to do with transgender is at first depending on what definition of transgender you use. In the original meaning of transgender it is an umbrella term that also includes transvestites. And with "original" I mean the way the one who started using it meant it.
You can run but you can't hide .also at first sure of course it's very sexually arousing duhhh as you grow older wiser and progress and it becomes part of who you are as a person .i was fully engulfed in dressing up when I got to the point in life where I could dress with no time limits. THE urge to diswrobe and return to my masculin after masturbation went away and remain in my feminine .but the real test is once you paint your toe and put on your nails and leave them on that's when you start the levels of acceptances.please notice I use the word you a lot in my sentences I of course am referring to me.i feel I am gender fluid but I am drawn more to my femine .technically Im not gay I like both sexes why waste but I prefer men so much easier haaa .anyway for you 2 doctors you choose properly for you really don't know .Everyones path takes them on there own journey. Who's is anyone to Interpet why they chose there path who they choose to be or why they chose that particular journey in the first place.hmmmm
Like anything else,you have to ask yourself if that is God or the work of man. Put it this way, I have met few people no matter how religious who don't break the rules if their church in some way or the other,most people who are Cathlic don't follow church teaching 100% and most evangelical Christians do things in the bedroom their pastor wouldnt approve of *shrug*. Obviously if belief contradicts with your feelings and you feel the belief is right, then you have to clamp down on your feelings and ignore them,find ways to channel those feelings ( note I am not saying that is healthy or the right thing to do, I am not, I am saying that if going with your feelings would cause such conflict with your beliefs then you may not have much choice.I would tell you, though, that things that are printed as ironclad rules are not, they are the bigotry of those teaching it,not God. Put it this way, in the bible there is only reference to crossdressing, in Dueteronomy, which besides being Jewish law, also has context to it the preachers leave out.
Society tells us that women are more attractive and get more attention I cross dress because I want to appreciate that I'm attractive. I want to love the girl inside me Since women love a man for money, it's easier to love ourselves that expect a woman's love Cross dressing for arousal? I think p---hub arouses better than wearing panties. Is women ever dressed panty for arousal, then may be we do that for arousal too. But not currently
Sex is a human condition. What does not have a sexual dynamic to it ? The simple fact is they do not know, do not even really have a clue. It would take a time machine to go back & watch every interaction between parents & child . Perhaps to say oh that's it, that's the seed that this grew from, or not. Men & Women become aroused hopefully, it is a part of being alive.
Is it me or does it look as though she thinks he is crowding her space. Seems like she keeps pulling back. Do you think it might be that his slip is showing?
Rubbish like this so annoys me. Dressing in a particular way may for some cause sexual arousal but thats not exclusive to cross dressing. The statement makes as much sense as People who put on rubber gloves do so for sexual arousal. So protecting ones hands while doing the cleaning means we are only using the gloves for sex not to protect our hands from harsh chemicals. NO! The absolute absurdity that a man may wear a tube of fabric called a kilt and is manly but a tube of fabric called a skirt is only ever sexual. It Is the 21st century. How on earth men do not have total clothing rights by now I cannot understand. Until I hear these folks talking.
do evil spirits make women wear pants and dislike makeup too? Why do we only judge men who want to experiment with their wardrobe? Nobody questions women who dont wanna look super girly. These are just clothes. Society arbitrarily decided that some clothes for boys and some were for girls. There's nothing evil about this.
He is starting out with telling complete bllsht. Why should anyone want to listen to the rest? Lets hear how many here do it "for arousal" - just pu a simple "I do" below.
And after four weeks, nobody replied with "I do". That of course does not prove that there are none at all. But that someone calling himself a sex therapist claiming that x-dressers only do it for sexual arousal is not only ignorant, it is downright shocking and disqualifies him as a therapist.
Not all Crossdressers are sexually aroused by dressing. Some just enjoy the clothes, and getting to wear them. While it is perfectly common to feel sexy when you dress it doesn’t mean you are aroused.
Indeed. I was just going to say that. It may be true for some, but its not true for all.
I agree I cross dress when I'm down and want to escape my normal life
Thank you. I wanted to punch him.
I cross dress because it helps me relax from the day to day work I do. Female clothes are so much more comfortable to wear. I have been dong it for many years now and cannot see me stopping, I am 64 years old going on 65 and change into my female outfits every day after work, stress free evenings relaxing. Oh and yes all my work mates know and are supportive.
I crossdress to deal with depression and I like feeling different. Nice to take a break from being a man.
No, not everyone who cross dresses does it for arousal.
Exactly. Arousal might accompany it because you feel sexy, but really it's just something that makes me happy. I prefer feminine looks overall. I don't just wear skirts I also have tight jeans and transparent tops. I might even include an accessory like a crystal belt buckle.
@@christopheryoungbeck8837 Chris do you find that when your comfortable wearing female clothing after a while you don’t get much aroused easy
exactly
I agree it’s not about arousal 💯 just letting yourself be true with you
That true. Sometimes I get completely dressed, go out to diner, come home and pull off the makeup and not once think of masterbating.
Cross dressing is not always a fetish!
True. For me it is cosplay.
@@VictorianMaid99 Yeah, it can be for cosplay as well, as people can't group all men who crossdress into the same category or motivation for crossdressing.
Exactly
Just wanted to point out a very important detail about crossdressing. At second 15, Dr. Cannon says that "crossdressers are people who are sexually aroused by wearing women's clothing".
The problem is, this only applies to a part of crossdressers. This is called a fetish and isn't a negative thing. Some men and women just get aroused by wearing very high heels.
Another part of crossdressers are people who wear the clothing of the opposite gender because it makes them feel good and sexy. To more easily understand this, image a women wearing revealing clothing. She does this because it makes her feel good and confident about herself. She feels that that clothing accentuates the parts of her body she considers to be most desirable. Some crossdressing men do the same: using women's clothing, they put emphasis on their more feminine traits, because that is what makes them feel good and confident. To summarize, some men prefer to attract their partners by using their feminine traits rather than their masculine ones.
Hope this makes a little bit more sense. If anyone has any questions, please post them. I'll try and answer them asap.
I had questions is there cross dress like femdom I means cross dress like dominate not like Humiliation because most of them cross dress wearing like Humiliation
I cross dress because it makes me feel feminine, confident and happy. I'm probably the rare exception of cross dresser who is homosexual
It is not a negative thing at all. Go to church anymore Sunday in a holiness church and see all the high heels and long hair!
@@sultanalharbi8464yes, I ran with that club for a few years but realized I did not need them.
@@samuelbrown7831not so, I met several over the years.
0:17 we're not aroused, I love crossdressing, makes me feel happy breaking societal norms. It doesn't arouse kink
but why are you happy breaking societal norms? males usually, 99.9% of the time, don't look good in female clothes, it's a weird kink to want to look like a clown...
For a lot of men it's not for arousal for me it's a bit of both it's for the comfort of the clothes and the arousal but every man is different in their reasoning for crossdressing but either way if you're a man who crossdresses feel comfortable in the reason why you do it.
It can be both.
@@VictorianMaid99 Yeah, I think in most cases it's both, as they both play a part in the motivation to crossdress.
@@PredatorKingdom crossdressing can or cannot be sexual. For Pete's Sake the Chinese think small feet is a huge turn on. Everyone is different across the what...2 billion people on EARTH.
@@VictorianMaid99 I think it's 7 billion, but yes, everyone is different and people get turned onto all types of different things. Even thing that we might think is weird, is something that turns on others.
I am a crossdresser and I do not get aroused by crossdressing. Dr. cannon is totally wrong, and does not know what he is talking about. Dr. Jenn you need to interview a crossdresser and ask the question why we dress, I can bet that sexual arousal will not be the answer.
Not watching. I thought they would interview a REAL, 60 year old crossdresser.
recurring dreams of being a woman but don't feel the same in waking life. Yes its shameful as the dreams started at 16 and I never dared talk about it. Any ideas to get rid of the dreams?
Men may cross dress and women may cross dress, it’s just that it’s more acceptable for women to do it.
Secondly, not all cross dressers wear clothes normally associated with the opposite gender for sexual gratification or arousal. So do, some don’t.
Thirdly, depending on which study you read, approximately 10%/15% of the male population identify as gay or bisexual and the percentage of male cross dressers is the same. That means that 85%/90% of cross dressers identify as heterosexual or “straight “.
There is one group where there is a much higher percentage of gay/bisexual men and that is in “drag” culture, which is really a separate group altogether.
It is also generally accepted that the vast majority of male cross dressers do NOT think they are women or want to have SRS and live full-time as women.
Cross dressing is often called the “last taboo” as it is often mistakenly considered a “perversion” or “kink” and proponents are regularly abused both verbally & physically.
You stated well. When I used to go to the night clubs the straight men were always the problem. The guy men rarely gave me a second thought.
This 'doctor' states that a cross dresser is [a man] who is aroused by wearing women's clothing. I have two problems with this. FIrstly, what is a woman who is aroused by wearing men's clothing? Secondly, there may well be some people who enjoy cross-dressing but their sexual 'orientation' is 'straight' (biologically male or female), AND there may well be people who enjoy cross-dressing but their sexual orientation is [for want of a better word] 'gay'. There are so many 'labels' in society that so-called 'doctors' like to categorize.
This guy seems to have never crossed before in his life. How can these men and women for that matter comment on something they have no idea about?
My Ex was a crossdresser. He promised it was a stage. I was working on trying to accept it but there were other issues because he was a narcissist as well. They say the narcissist has 2 faces but including his cross dressing persona, he had more than 2 faces. He was sweet when he dressed as a woman. Because he was also a narcissist I was put down for being closed minded and a Debbie downer. He was also into role reversal sexually. He liked to be the bottom. It all made me uncomfortable. I think in some relationships cross dressing may be acceptable but there has to be true love and no emotional abuse present.
Rachel Hope At least you tried. You sound like a good woman.
@@serpenttay just be a good wife and be happy he'll change if you let him dress and keep him in panties 24\7 you'll have the control over him. Like why wouldn't you want a crossdresser for a husband
Hi Rachel,
I'm Shreyasta. I think I'm facing a situation similar to yours. Is there any way I can get to talk to you? I really have many unanswered questions. I could use your insight. Let me know if you'd like to connect. I'll send you my Skype ID. Until then, have a good day.
@@serpenttay same here taylure.
My take on it fwiw is that if issues like narcissism or emotional abuse are involved it is not really about being a CD,even if it.manifests there.
It is very,very easy when the window opens up so to speak,the floodgates opened, you have someone freed from the closet,etc,and they can forget about the spouse/partner. If hubby is spending a ton of money on dresses and shoes, going out every weekend and ignoring the family, etc that isn't good. Not really all that different then a spouse buying an expensive car when money is tight, or other such excesses.
Two things are key here IMO, open communication and reasonable boundaries. Communicating means the CD talking about what they think they need, things like maybe asking for help from the spouse w buying warddrobe,makeup,etc ( or if spouse doesn't want to be involved,setting budgets for spending or cd getting makeup lessons from a pro),how involved the spouse is ( like going to a cd event together, etc).
Reasonable boundaries are just that. A spouse saying he can dress once a year on Halloween is not setting reasonable boundaries or dictating them, they need to be negotiated, same way a cd saying ' I plan on going to cd conventions all over the country' is dictating ( among other things,the cost and time to do that). If a CD needs regular time to dress to be happy,rigidly setting it to 1vday a month by the spouse is wrong, but working out a compromise is fine,as long as both are okay with it, if not totally thrilled. One of the problems CDs face with spouses is that they are so grateful the spouse hasn't thrown them.out of the house they will take anything; for the spouse, I have seen CDs go overboard knowing that in some ways they have power over the spouse ( like where spouse is SAHM mom to young kids and financially dependent) to blow open the door.
It requires honesty, too,for the CD to say what they want and the spouse to be honest about her feelings. It can be really hard,worse nightmare for many CDs spouses is their partner coming home one day and saying 'I want to be a woman' ( it isn't as common as some claim,most CDs are not trans, and even fewer if they are will admit to themselves they are IME,).
Not saying it is easy, it can be really hard. One thing ai highly recommend is finding a counselor that is knowledgeable,not like these two in the video. These days thanks to the internet and the work counselors and professionals have done, there are people trained in issues around this out there, in this world of virtual sessions they don't even have to be local, you can use zoom or Skype. Crossdresser support sites often have links to people, not to mention therapists themselves advertise it on their website, do a web search of counseling services in your area and you are not unlikely to find one. Stay the heck away from clergy or religious counsellors,even ones from supposedly liberal backgrounds are usually really bad w issues like this.
Two people I watch on you tube,heidiphox and xdressing with paola, are married and they have videos talking about their experiences w their spouses,there are others as well.
nothing causes it. Its not a condition, thats like asking what causes women to wear pants and sweatshirts
Good diagnostic and good advise.
I didn't want to write about societal norms of the 19th/20th century, but I feel it is a factor.
cross dressing my ass. Womens clothing is just more comfortable period
Faxs
to you...
Im a athletic man who love to wear womens and mens clothes, its kind of like whatever, its all just fabric to cover up my body when in public, yes, i love to put on a barbie tennis outfit and go play tennis! So fun! And not in a sexual way, but just as a look.
What about makeup, high heels, and bras and panties?
@@GameTime-yj6qv yes, yes and yes!
It is definitely fun to do!
@@GameTime-yj6qvthat is all part of the fun!
i am straight male and only like girls..
but..i like to wear female clothes..but i am feeling depression and i dont know is it wrong or right..i am very confused and i dont have a person to share this..i feel lonely
I am a 38 year old woman, here's my two cents...
I don't think it's wrong. You just need to do it in a way that is respectful to others and their boundaries.
I suggest, if you are dating a girl and it becomes serious...sit her down and have a serious conversation about it. She might have questions. Try to answer them as honestly as possible. Most women think it's creepy or weird. Some women will make an exception to this, for a man they care about. Believe it or not, a minority of women actually find it a total turn on.
Some don'ts :
Don't just spring it on someone without warning. That's disrespectful as you don't know how that might affect them.
Don't pressure someone into going along with it if they don't feel comfortable.
If you go out in public, stick to places, times and events where children will not be present. Clubbing late on a Friday night is a good example of an appropriate time and place.
Also, there is such a thing as propriety information. Not EVERYONE needs to know about it. Be discrete. However, you need to inform your partner as soon as things start getting serious. That's only fair.
There are support groups in most large cities for transgender people, which includes crossdressers. That would be a good place to start. They are just clothes, and wearing a skirt and/or some makeup isn't going to consign you to going to hell, despite what fundie christians want you to think. Most allow you to attend crossdressed, or not, as your circumstances require. Nearly all of them have some sort of online presence, google is your friend.
@@thebigcountry8518 it's not a man living his own life! It's a member of a team, whose choices and actions will have an indelible impact on someone (maybe multiple someone's) else's life.
@@henzsol6771 I wear a black kilt and tights everywhere I go during the fall and winter. I go to places with heavy foot traffic like coffee shops. I don't sneak around and try to hide from people. it's when you sneak around that people suspect something fishy is going on which is exactly why I don't do that. I'm very open and authentic about who I am. Does it take a lot of courage and carrying a can of Mace with you for security reasons? Yes. But I will not hide or stay in the dark. People appreciate honesty in all of its forms so long as it includes modesty and sensibility when assembling ones outfit. I don't even wear makeup.
@@henzsol6771 well written, the key is in communicating and in setting reasonable boundaries, same as most things in relationship.
I enjoy dressing and very rarely ever have an orgasm or anything. I think the variety of womens cloths is amazing.
I started when I was 14.
5
Jennifer Hope Safe
11
9
I'm thinking about cross dressing
yes we do know you are born thisway!
Crossdressing is normal. Everybody who doesn't crossdress are repressed weirdos. Maybe the quack doctors ought to do a video on exploring why people don't wear what they want!! In societies where crossdressing is an every day fact, no one gets hung up about it.
Exactly. BTW I think that he is incorrect saying that it is based on sexual arousal. Maybe a long time ago there was a level of arousal, not now.
Saying someone who doesn't crossdress is abnormal is like saying someone who does is abnormal. The judging is the problem,someone can be fine w crossdressers and not want to do it themselves. Heck their are transgender women who hate CDs,go figure.
@@ivarplavinskis4668 yeah that dates back to the idea when crossdressers were known as fetishistic transvestites, the asumption was it was a fetish ( the modern version is that idiot Bailey's aurigynophilia concept)
Bras, high heels, lipstick, etc are made for women. So if men use those things its violating a societal norm.
At age 12 I found moms lipstick, nobody was home so I went to the bathroom and tried to put it on. There was an explosion of sexual delight and an instant boner let loose. My Anima was there and she wasn't going away. It was that red lipstick the ladies wore in the 1950s. It made me fall in love with myself. I kept doing this "Shameful" thing all day. Oops! at last It would not rub off! That and I had to go to school the next day. Sheesh! my bullies were going to have a party on me. I could not believe it when nobody noticed it. True story!
YOLO
That was a great recollection.
Wow very well put thank you
My mother always was scared I was a transgender, and wanted to be a woman.
MY WIFE WORRIES ABOUT THAT WITH ME
@@Brian.8272 she has good reason to worry if you dressing like a woman...
You should ask your mom does that make woman a transgender when they go around wearing mens clothes as it goes both ways.
"Aroused by it at...SIX"!?! WTF!?
I knew at 7
It was cause with me by every time I couldn't get nothing right peaple would call me a girl.I just took over
This is pretty poorly done,for a number of reasons. First of all while there are crossdressers who get an erotic charge out of cd'ing,whether they get off on (to them,) being humiliated wearing women's clothing ( I am using men cd'ing bc quite honestly women can wear what they want, not a lot of reason to crossdress when they can put on men's pants,shirt and tie and ppl would think it was cute). Some CDs get dressed,get aroused and get off on that. Some when they dress get aroused bc they are in their femme personna and it is being in that personna that turns them on and they want to have sex as her (folks,just my opinions, not claiming truth here), it as varied. But a lot of CDs dress because it is an expression of themselves, an alter ego of sorts, and they aren't aroused by it pee se, though as in their male personna that doesn't mean they couldn't have sex,bit the arousal is not about the dressing itself. Many report it is calming,it is their better half,etc. Some CDs could be transgendered and for whatever reasons cannot transition, this is a way to be themselves at least part time.
The guy when he said 6 yrs old is correct in that many CDs become interested in women's things when they are young, bit it isn't arousal. There is a while school of analysis going back to Freud that have these notions of early child sexuality, but I strongly doubt a 6 yr old dresses because they then get off,and any pleasure they get out of trying on women's things is likely it feels good in an innocent sense.
I don't like blanket statements either,this is complex territory.
Some of the CD groups for example go out of their way to say they are 'normal het men w a hobby', and are often viciously transphobic and anti gay,saying ',it has nothing to do w sex'. This is them trying to gain acceptence from ',normal' society,and it is bullshit, bc based on experience a lot of those 'normal' CDs when dressed are situationally bisexual ( ie when dressed can be attracted to men or women or fellow CDs). Been to plenty of TG clubs where admirers hang out and seen more than a few self proclaimed 'hets' go off to have fun w a guy or fellow cd.
The real answer to the question is that CDing doesn't mean the person is gay or bi or transgendered or any one thing but that it is not abnormal or dangerous.
Definitely an ego booster. I can do things as a lady I cannot do as a man.
I’m a cross dresser 😂
What do you mean "what causes it"?? it's nothing wrong. you can make your own choices in life. clothes are clothes it's society's fault that men can't wear girl clothes and girls can't wear men's clothes without getting negative reactions from the public.
obviously something causes it. you think it just magically comes from nowhere? what by magic? think about it
it's far far more acceptable for women to dress as men, they do it all the time
@@megag52 it's just cross dressing it doesn't your gay/trans or bi
@@megag52 what causes women to wear pants? Nobody psycho analyzes tomboys
@@JoeDirtisawsome women's pants are very very feminine, so a women wear pants isn't always a good comparison to a man wearing a pink dress, but I get whar you mean. In terms of studying women with masculine minds I think somebody somewhere must have looked into it at least a bit
Hey!? Can I have a clarification? but the misconception is that it has nothing to do with being transexual or being transgendered (seems to say that it does have something to do with being transexual or transgendered so I am confused about what he is actually saying...OH! wait a minute! I see! It is a misconception that it has anything to do with being transexual or transgender! think that is what he is saying - how he said this is not clear...I am going to ask and hope for an answer). Only he can clarify what he said in an inarticulate and casual way which he did several times!
That it has nothing to do with transgender is at first depending on what definition of transgender you use. In the original meaning of transgender it is an umbrella term that also includes transvestites. And with "original" I mean the way the one who started using it meant it.
I think his opening is statement is just wrong. It isn't about arousal!
You can run but you can't hide .also at first sure of course it's very sexually arousing duhhh as you grow older wiser and progress and it becomes part of who you are as a person .i was fully engulfed in dressing up when I got to the point in life where I could dress with no time limits. THE urge to diswrobe and return to my masculin after masturbation went away and remain in my feminine .but the real test is once you paint your toe and put on your nails and leave them on that's when you start the levels of acceptances.please notice I use the word you a lot in my sentences I of course am referring to me.i feel I am gender fluid but I am drawn more to my femine .technically Im not gay I like both sexes why waste but I prefer men so much easier haaa .anyway for you 2 doctors you choose properly for you really don't know .Everyones path takes them on there own journey. Who's is anyone to Interpet why they chose there path who they choose to be or why they chose that particular journey in the first place.hmmmm
What about spiritual beliefs that it's wrong and bothcoming from church upbringing that it's against one person's beliefs in the relationship..Peter
Like anything else,you have to ask yourself if that is God or the work of man. Put it this way, I have met few people no matter how religious who don't break the rules if their church in some way or the other,most people who are Cathlic don't follow church teaching 100% and most evangelical Christians do things in the bedroom their pastor wouldnt approve of *shrug*. Obviously if belief contradicts with your feelings and you feel the belief is right, then you have to clamp down on your feelings and ignore them,find ways to channel those feelings ( note I am not saying that is healthy or the right thing to do, I am not, I am saying that if going with your feelings would cause such conflict with your beliefs then you may not have much choice.I would tell you, though, that things that are printed as ironclad rules are not, they are the bigotry of those teaching it,not God. Put it this way, in the bible there is only reference to crossdressing, in Dueteronomy, which besides being Jewish law, also has context to it the preachers leave out.
hell let them do it if its comfortable for them dont judge'em dont go out and make a big stink about it u cant gender clothing
Society tells us that women are more attractive and get more attention
I cross dress because I want to appreciate that I'm attractive. I want to love the girl inside me
Since women love a man for money, it's easier to love ourselves that expect a woman's love
Cross dressing for arousal? I think p---hub arouses better than wearing panties.
Is women ever dressed panty for arousal, then may be we do that for arousal too. But not currently
Sex is a human condition. What does not have a sexual dynamic to it ? The simple fact is they do not know, do not even really have a clue. It would take a time machine to go back & watch every interaction between parents & child . Perhaps to say oh that's it, that's the seed that this grew from, or not. Men & Women become aroused hopefully, it is a part of being alive.
Is it me or does it look as though she thinks he is crowding her space. Seems like she keeps pulling back. Do you think it might be that his slip is showing?
I enjoy wearing pantyhose and satin panties along with satin sleepwear.
Rubbish like this so annoys me. Dressing in a particular way may for some cause sexual arousal but thats not exclusive to cross dressing. The statement makes as much sense as People who put on rubber gloves do so for sexual arousal. So protecting ones hands while doing the cleaning means we are only using the gloves for sex not to protect our hands from harsh chemicals. NO! The absolute absurdity that a man may wear a tube of fabric called a kilt and is manly but a tube of fabric called a skirt is only ever sexual. It Is the 21st century. How on earth men do not have total clothing rights by now I cannot understand. Until I hear these folks talking.
I just got into it its fun with the wife we have a blast with it
Could it be an evil spirit that causes it?
Of course. Demons taught humans all these things
@@jessicacorrea7221 lmao. Demons don’t exist.
@@code5829 yes they do trust me
@@code5829 I have experience
do evil spirits make women wear pants and dislike makeup too? Why do we only judge men who want to experiment with their wardrobe? Nobody questions women who dont wanna look super girly. These are just clothes. Society arbitrarily decided that some clothes for boys and some were for girls. There's nothing evil about this.
What is this hate?
He is starting out with telling complete bllsht. Why should anyone want to listen to the rest?
Lets hear how many here do it "for arousal" - just pu a simple "I do" below.
And after four weeks, nobody replied with "I do". That of course does not prove that there are none at all. But that someone calling himself a sex therapist claiming that x-dressers only do it for sexual arousal is not only ignorant, it is downright shocking and disqualifies him as a therapist.
i saw sum dude one time wearin panty hose and wearin womens pants n shoes and had a purse