I’ve been waiting for your break downs on the anxious attachment style. You hit the nail on the head, I displayed all of this in my previous relationship. Earning love and appreciation, attaching myself to his purpose, identifying my needs with his, over giving, burning out, not knowing my needs. I remember he’d ask me”what do you need? Are you happy?” And I could never answer that question- I didn’t know my needs. I thought being his helper was my need but my frontal lobe had barely developed when we met. Also, he is avoidant so in the beginning he wanted all the attention and help and love (which I thought was me caring but really it was giving him no choice but to need me through my acts of service) I gave him and wanted me in his space all the time until eventually it just overwhelmed him. I ran out of steam as well. Kojo, kudos.
I did get my worth from pleasing him. I remember even sex became an act of service. As a parent, I’m learning that my worth isn’t in being a mother although I am honoured. This is another level of learning about who I am to myself. I do want more. And I’ve had to allow myself that space in the most unconventional way. But it’s proving to be worth it - I even take PTO from work. My takeaway - to define who I am outside of these things I desire (being a wife, being a mother) so I can be authentically me.
They were married for 14 years. They have known each other for 25 years. When she experienced burn out, he could have said, 'I love you. Focus on yourself now...prioritize your happiness and healing. I will step up in the marriage and support you (emotionally, etc).' Perhaps when she changed/grew, he was not willing to grow and accept the new dynamic.
Or avoided the depth that this path would lead him to. I’ve learned that even the conversations are difficult for the avoidant and dismissive. Just his style.
One thing we must stop doing is expecting ourselves from other people. This situation highlights the need for consistent couples therapy and communication. She could have also told him exactly what she needed because she knows his personality after 25 years. But honestly the thought of that convo prob gave her anxiety and she just sat on it then exploded. And once she was there it’s was full steam ahead. Sounds crazy but that’s real. Speaking from a real space of understanding
I was a secure attachment and i BECAME an 16:03 anxious attachment 😪 I knew exactly what my needs were. They were not getting met on PURPOSE until i fulfilled all of his needs. They when i “came close”, he moved the goal post- i felt like a rabbit chasing a carrot. 🥕 😢
I appreciate how you explore both sides. Understanding these things will allow me to approach things w a dismissive avoidant person. This is so eye opening ! Especially the burn out. Going to approach life differently!!! ❤
I absolutely understand this, dealt with the same thing. It's up to you to make the change once you are aware of the attachment style. My husband and I had a good therapist and we figured it out but the DA style is common in Blk Men as alot of them are conditioned, add any unhealthy childhood to that and this is what you get. This is why self healing and introspection is so important. My parents had us in and out of counseling since the age of 14 so it was easier for me to do the self work, because I had the tools. If you have someone who doesn't know how to do the work and will not dig in with you. It's hurtful because that person who is AA will feel ultimately they were never enough. It's hugely important to hear the person when they say this is their need. if you refuse them then there's the nail in the coffin of your relationship.
It’s simple, their marriage ended because she was the bread winner for decades and she was also the one who was putting all the work and energy into their family and marriage, and after a while she became exhausted and burnt out, and her husband NEVER stepped up, so she left him. And if you’ve ever seen their short-lived reality television show, you would see, he was not a kind man. He was constantly annoyed by her happiness and excitement for life, and he was rude and distant, if you’re going to do your research, do it all thoroughly. This is about men being clueless and never getting it, not attachment styles. If I had a dollar for every time I heard a man say their wife divorced them for no reason, I would be rich, there’s always a reason, you’re just too clueless to figure it out, even after she has told you over, and over, and over again…. for years🤷🏾♀️
Dismissive avoidant attachment is common in males because of their social conditioning. So it kinda does go hand in hand. Not disagreeing with you, because everything you said is right, but being a DA is most common among men.
@shhhperry9852 I work in the entertainment industry, and that was heard from some of their mutuals. This is speculation bc I don't personally know them. Tia's parents had a traditional relationship, Cory came from a single mom. Sometimes, BM from single moms are too comfortable being overly reliant on the women in their lives, especially if the mom coddled him or made him her emotional husband. Tia thought she'd pour into Cory (build her man, as BW are conditioned to do), then she'd get to rest in the spoils of her hard work as Cory stepped up to lead as a finished product. The problem was, Cory felt comfortable in the dynamic of "You (meaning we) got money. We're good. I don't need to work harder." On their reality show, there was a scene where Tia was telling Tamera she was overwhelmed working so much. Tamera (with a provider husband) advised her to take a break like she did. Tia said she couldn't because she had bills. Hollywood talk says Tia would set up opportunites for Cory (see his role as Cable Guy on The Game), and he wouldn't want to do it bc he could always fall back on her. He's motivated to work now bc he has to.
This is the MOST Insightful Explanation of their marriage Breakdown out there. I Hope for the Best for BOTH of Them. May they Both find Solstice in CHRIST JESUS and become WHOLE 🙌🏿🕊️🪔
Love this breakdown. I am definitely an anxious attachment style individual. And I now find myself in like with someone who has an avoidant attachment style. This was very eye opening.
I agree with this video title and everything you're saying. My partner is exactly like Cory. But detaching slightly and learning him taught me so much. Learning from his attachment style, moved me from anxious to secure and taught me to communicate from love as opposed to expectation. Thereby, he has also shifted from avoidant to secure because i changed how i communicate to reassuring him that im not angry or leaving him before amd after stating my request or "complaint". Tia had an amazing man. Cory is a fantastic actor and will be raking in the kind of finances it's taken a while for him to acquire. I think he just might win an Oscar soon actually. Tia lacks some self awareness. She needed to take time for her inner transformation. Its easy to throw the baby with the bathwater. Which she did unfortunately.
I feel like the title of this video is a bit click baitey. To say she ruined her marriage is foul. Being an AA is not her fault. Even a secure person that loved their partner would expect their partner to be equally yoked in the relationship.
@@lwarfield52You completely missed the point if that’s what you concluded from what he just said. A relationship has 2 ppl. They both contributed to its issues. Hence each video saying the ruined the Marriage.
@@LittleBlackBook91 i think she should've taken a breath, figured things about herself before trying to date. Like its impossible to just move on from a 14 year marriage even if it was the worst marriage possible. That's where she messed up. Corey does seem like someone who is closed off and that can be draining so im not faulting her for leaving either.. she just needs to calm down
@@chocciechocchoc1 but she is crying about the divorce every second. Maybe she should have figured it out with her hubby instead of imitating divorce. It’s clear she listens to the wrong voice and now regrets it.
Why is it that her attachment style ruined the relationship? I find that it's always the anxious attached is the one always trying to hold and keep the relationship together.
Honestly for me I see something different, Tia fell for the Trick Of The Enemy. She’s into “New Age” and instead of leaning on Christ for a breakthrough in her marriage, she ran! The enemy used them to continue to destroy marriages One by One
@@lorisajones364 I feel so bad for them both because of her failure (& failure to pray) & disobedience, Cory Will next have a Jezebel that would destroy their whole family. I see that in the spirit….He wasn’t paid that money in a “Demonic” center film for nothing. It will cost him everything 😢😔
She needs to much attention. That’s why she can’t stop talking about HIM…. All while getting advice from her “single/none married” friends vs her married sister. I bet her sister told her the truth about herself. Tia is not a pouring person. That part is obvious.
I disagree. Anxious PEOPLE DO LET OTHERS KNOW THEIR NEEDS VEHEMENTLY but others GASLIGHT THEM and make light of it or ignore it and they get tired anxious people and time passes and then they're ready to leave and the person says, "You never let me know your need." Which is a lie b/c the person might have sung a song about it but got TIRED and time passes and then they're like by. But psychologically, they start to feel this lie is true and they didn't tell the person b/c time has passed. But the fact is they did tell them constantly, might have had physical altercations and then it's forgotten their requests and so on.
How long would you consider it could take a DA or FA to heal their attachment style and move toward a more secure attachment style, given they put in the work?
hard to say. What we are doing is about changing mindsets. For me I'm 8 months into my journey. Most of my healing has been in teaching others how to be more secure lol....I would say depends on your intensity
@ I understand. I’m FA. I originally thought I was DA, then identified a lot of anxious traits in myself. Thanks for sharing your own journey. It’s really inspiring to me. And thanks for responding to comments!
What you describe is a clamourous woman, and the bible speaks about that. Her love language is service, by doing everything she felt everybody would like/love her and it was not just for Corey only. Friends, family and social media that was her problem. That to me is insecurities. I believe it all came to a head when she had her second child and I believe postpartum played a major part in it. Corey was very involve in taking care of his children so it was not that he totally neglected her to do everything.
@@chrishenry7303 thank you. I have a question I hope you’ll engage. I get how folly (foolish,senseless, gullible) and a clamorous (loud,confused, bringing attention to self in unruly ways) can be the result of a lack of (self and ultimately godly) knowledge and understanding as a woman but how did you make the connection with acts of service being the love language?
@@FindingNeli When someone constantly do things with the intention to be appreciated, validated or complemented for what they do all the time it takes away from the genuine nature of what they are doing. She felt if I do this or go the extra mile to do whatever they feel they needed to do, that people will love her more or appreciate them more. Yes, love is demonstrated in your actions. However, if it is done unconditionallly you eventually reap the rewards of it. The rewards may not be right away but later when you least expected. Example.a mother who poures her heart and soul into raising her children the right way, may not see the benefits until the children are grown up and are handling their lives and may not see or understand what she was was trying to instill in them when they were younger. When those same children grows up and have children of their own only then they will tend to love and appreciate their mother. Based on what she explained that she was a people pleaser, she was doing it to get validation, love and appreciation and can be considered clamourous (only) looking for attention and expect people to show appreciation for all she was doing.
Her childhood acting wasnt making her feel she's a servant responsible for the publics happiness you overanalysed there and gave an inaccurate description
Reports came out that she's a naturally jealous person, and that Corey actually paid the bills even though it was said that she did it. That she was jealous of something in Corey perhaps his potential. That's why he started to blow up when she got away from him.
I’m going tbh here but I know from two films-one with KeKe Palmer and the new Tyler Perry movie. There’s no way that he could pay any bills. He was a kept man. All he should have been doing is giving his wife love & support but somehow he managed to be resentment, vindictive & tiring. It makes no sense.
She knew he was broke when she met him, she loved him unconditionally then. He sacrificed a lot of his career for the family too . I think when she had the second child, she felt overwhelmed with being a mom taking care of the house. The kids and the carrer felt like she was taking care of everyone no for her. I could understand a lot of women feel like that post partum. But she should have loved him unconditionally and tried to work it out she had one child that's was very young, and she had already come from divorced parents. Out of nowhere, she wants to be selfish, dating around spreading her wing self love.
Being broke at 20 is different than at 40. Marriage isn't meant to be unconditional. The first thing you do when you get married is agree to conditions - vows. The marriage isn't even valid unless you sign a legal contract agreeing to be held to those conditions. To file for divorce, you typically file with the condition that was broken.
@Scott0588 they were married. When you make vows to marry, you love the person no matter what unconditionally through good and bad. She who wanted marriage, he wanted to wait. He sacrifice too. She knew what she was getting into.
@@emiliaessentials That belief is why marriages are failing and people go in with unrealistic beliefs. Marriage has very clear conditions. If the vows are broken, the marriage is broken, whether you stay together or not. "I vow to love unconditionally" is not said for a reason. We also can't absolve Cory. She could want marriage all she wants, if he wasn't ready, as a man, he should've stood on that. By passively going along with it, he took a submissive role.
@Scott0588 so what are the conditions?? Prople needs to think 2 or 3 times before committing to someone, especially if you have young children have more than one.
@@emiliaessentials The vows are the conditions! For example, "I vow to forsake all others" means you agree to remain faithful. If you cheat in the marriage, divorce paperwork would name infidelity as grounds for divorce because that was the condition that was broken. If you vow to honor and cherish your wife, then leave her to do the lion's share of the work at the expense of her health/wellbeing, I could see how that could lead to divorce, especially if you're at an impasse where either something changes or she consistently has an empty cup.
I’ve been waiting for your break downs on the anxious attachment style. You hit the nail on the head, I displayed all of this in my previous relationship. Earning love and appreciation, attaching myself to his purpose, identifying my needs with his, over giving, burning out, not knowing my needs. I remember he’d ask me”what do you need? Are you happy?” And I could never answer that question- I didn’t know my needs. I thought being his helper was my need but my frontal lobe had barely developed when we met. Also, he is avoidant so in the beginning he wanted all the attention and help and love (which I thought was me caring but really it was giving him no choice but to need me through my acts of service) I gave him and wanted me in his space all the time until eventually it just overwhelmed him. I ran out of steam as well.
Kojo, kudos.
I did get my worth from pleasing him. I remember even sex became an act of service.
As a parent, I’m learning that my worth isn’t in being a mother although I am honoured. This is another level of learning about who I am to myself. I do want more. And I’ve had to allow myself that space in the most unconventional way. But it’s proving to be worth it - I even take PTO from work.
My takeaway - to define who I am outside of these things I desire (being a wife, being a mother) so I can be authentically me.
They were married for 14 years. They have known each other for 25 years. When she experienced burn out, he could have said, 'I love you. Focus on yourself now...prioritize your happiness and healing. I will step up in the marriage and support you (emotionally, etc).' Perhaps when she changed/grew, he was not willing to grow and accept the new dynamic.
Or avoided the depth that this path would lead him to. I’ve learned that even the conversations are difficult for the avoidant and dismissive. Just his style.
One thing we must stop doing is expecting ourselves from other people. This situation highlights the need for consistent couples therapy and communication. She could have also told him exactly what she needed because she knows his personality after 25 years.
But honestly the thought of that convo prob gave her anxiety and she just sat on it then exploded. And once she was there it’s was full steam ahead.
Sounds crazy but that’s real.
Speaking from a real space of understanding
@@danif4750 menopause she’s in her early 40s
Thats exactly what I feel happened too, among other things.
I was a secure attachment and i BECAME an 16:03 anxious attachment 😪 I knew exactly what my needs were. They were not getting met on PURPOSE until i fulfilled all of his needs. They when i “came close”, he moved the goal post- i felt like a rabbit chasing a carrot. 🥕 😢
That sounds like a man who didn’t care sorry
This is so good man! You're doing the lords work providing this information and giving examples. Literally saving lives.
@@Jovialjay86 that’s what God called us for amen
I appreciate how you explore both sides. Understanding these things will allow me to approach things w a dismissive avoidant person.
This is so eye opening ! Especially the burn out. Going to approach life differently!!! ❤
come on we got u
I absolutely understand this, dealt with the same thing. It's up to you to make the change once you are aware of the attachment style. My husband and I had a good therapist and we figured it out but the DA style is common in Blk Men as alot of them are conditioned, add any unhealthy childhood to that and this is what you get. This is why self healing and introspection is so important. My parents had us in and out of counseling since the age of 14 so it was easier for me to do the self work, because I had the tools. If you have someone who doesn't know how to do the work and will not dig in with you. It's hurtful because that person who is AA will feel ultimately they were never enough. It's hugely important to hear the person when they say this is their need. if you refuse them then there's the nail in the coffin of your relationship.
No better words
It’s simple, their marriage ended because she was the bread winner for decades and she was also the one who was putting all the work and energy into their family and marriage, and after a while she became exhausted and burnt out, and her husband NEVER stepped up, so she left him. And if you’ve ever seen their short-lived reality television show, you would see, he was not a kind man. He was constantly annoyed by her happiness and excitement for life, and he was rude and distant, if you’re going to do your research, do it all thoroughly. This is about men being clueless and never getting it, not attachment styles. If I had a dollar for every time I heard a man say their wife divorced them for no reason, I would be rich, there’s always a reason, you’re just too clueless to figure it out, even after she has told you over, and over, and over again…. for years🤷🏾♀️
Dismissive avoidant attachment is common in males because of their social conditioning. So it kinda does go hand in hand. Not disagreeing with you, because everything you said is right, but being a DA is most common among men.
I totally agree with you.
@shhhperry9852 I work in the entertainment industry, and that was heard from some of their mutuals. This is speculation bc I don't personally know them. Tia's parents had a traditional relationship, Cory came from a single mom. Sometimes, BM from single moms are too comfortable being overly reliant on the women in their lives, especially if the mom coddled him or made him her emotional husband. Tia thought she'd pour into Cory (build her man, as BW are conditioned to do), then she'd get to rest in the spoils of her hard work as Cory stepped up to lead as a finished product. The problem was, Cory felt comfortable in the dynamic of "You (meaning we) got money. We're good. I don't need to work harder." On their reality show, there was a scene where Tia was telling Tamera she was overwhelmed working so much. Tamera (with a provider husband) advised her to take a break like she did. Tia said she couldn't because she had bills. Hollywood talk says Tia would set up opportunites for Cory (see his role as Cable Guy on The Game), and he wouldn't want to do it bc he could always fall back on her. He's motivated to work now bc he has to.
@@Scott0588sounds like my step father. Wow.
‼️‼️
This is the MOST Insightful Explanation of their marriage Breakdown out there. I Hope for the Best for BOTH of Them. May they Both find Solstice in CHRIST JESUS and become WHOLE 🙌🏿🕊️🪔
This was really good!
I am loving your growth and work these days Kojo..❤
Love this breakdown. I am definitely an anxious attachment style individual. And I now find myself in like with someone who has an avoidant attachment style. This was very eye opening.
I agree with this video title and everything you're saying. My partner is exactly like Cory. But detaching slightly and learning him taught me so much. Learning from his attachment style, moved me from anxious to secure and taught me to communicate from love as opposed to expectation. Thereby, he has also shifted from avoidant to secure because i changed how i communicate to reassuring him that im not angry or leaving him before amd after stating my request or "complaint". Tia had an amazing man. Cory is a fantastic actor and will be raking in the kind of finances it's taken a while for him to acquire. I think he just might win an Oscar soon actually. Tia lacks some self awareness. She needed to take time for her inner transformation. Its easy to throw the baby with the bathwater. Which she did unfortunately.
Why do you think he was an amazing man?
I think she's having a mid life crisis.
I feel like the title of this video is a bit click baitey. To say she ruined her marriage is foul. Being an AA is not her fault. Even a secure person that loved their partner would expect their partner to be equally yoked in the relationship.
part 1 i said he ruined the marriage
@@LittleBlackBook91I agree! Cory ruined the marriage.
@@LittleBlackBook91 fair.
@@lwarfield52You completely missed the point if that’s what you concluded from what he just said. A relationship has 2 ppl. They both contributed to its issues. Hence each video saying the ruined the
Marriage.
@@thebarbieinvestor5428I don’t think they were disagreeing with what he said but was thrown off by the video title…that’s all
I asked and you delivered. Thank you!
@@mercedezeileen3630 we got u keep asking I’m in season of giving
But your insight is On Point Kojo🙌🏽😍
Thank you sooooooo much for this breakdown! You’ve helped me understand me.
After seeing the first video, i figured she had an anxious attachment given she was trying to date so soon after the divorce
@@chocciechocchoc1 yep and she realising how bad dating market is
@@LittleBlackBook91 i think she should've taken a breath, figured things about herself before trying to date. Like its impossible to just move on from a 14 year marriage even if it was the worst marriage possible. That's where she messed up. Corey does seem like someone who is closed off and that can be draining so im not faulting her for leaving either.. she just needs to calm down
@@chocciechocchoc1 but she is crying about the divorce every second. Maybe she should have figured it out with her hubby instead of imitating divorce. It’s clear she listens to the wrong voice and now regrets it.
Why is it that her attachment style ruined the relationship? I find that it's always the anxious attached is the one always trying to hold and keep the relationship together.
in part 1 i said he ruined the relationship
Maybe because he was always being him but she wasn't which leads to downfalls. Not saying they both weren't responsible but that def is an issue.
@@LittleBlackBook91 stop flip flopping...lol
Why were their marriage issues/ problems brought the publics attention 🤔
Corey just signed a contract worth 75million.
Honestly for me I see something different, Tia fell for the Trick Of The Enemy. She’s into “New Age” and instead of leaning on Christ for a breakthrough in her marriage, she ran! The enemy used them to continue to destroy marriages One by One
I agree with you completely!
@@lorisajones364 I feel so bad for them both because of her failure (& failure to pray) & disobedience, Cory Will next have a Jezebel that would destroy their whole family. I see that in the spirit….He wasn’t paid that money in a “Demonic” center film for nothing. It will cost him everything 😢😔
She and Gabrielle Unions daughters are playmates,hmmm??
@@sharesecombs3931 wow! I wonder who opened her up for an attack from the devil…. maybe Gabrielle Union🤦🏽♀️
Her ex husband did a great Job In the "Movie" Karen! They are great actors!
She needs to much attention. That’s why she can’t stop talking about HIM…. All while getting advice from her “single/none married” friends vs her married sister. I bet her sister told her the truth about herself. Tia is not a pouring person. That part is obvious.
They were married and needed help communicating so they should have gotten help.
Does she ever shut up.
I would love for you to do a follow up video now that she is busy crying about this unnecessary divorce ok her reality show
I disagree. Anxious PEOPLE DO LET OTHERS KNOW THEIR NEEDS VEHEMENTLY but others GASLIGHT THEM and make light of it or ignore it and they get tired anxious people and time passes and then they're ready to leave and the person says, "You never let me know your need." Which is a lie b/c the person might have sung a song about it but got TIRED and time passes and then they're like by. But psychologically, they start to feel this lie is true and they didn't tell the person b/c time has passed. But the fact is they did tell them constantly, might have had physical altercations and then it's forgotten their requests and so on.
How long would you consider it could take a DA or FA to heal their attachment style and move toward a more secure attachment style, given they put in the work?
hard to say. What we are doing is about changing mindsets. For me I'm 8 months into my journey. Most of my healing has been in teaching others how to be more secure lol....I would say depends on your intensity
@ I understand. I’m FA. I originally thought I was DA, then identified a lot of anxious traits in myself. Thanks for sharing your own journey. It’s really inspiring to me. And thanks for responding to comments!
Only a fool will believe whatever Tia says... Lady Curriculum 😊
I love your growth but I miss your input on reality tv
@@daniellereddick6285 we will comeback there later. 👋
⁰p@@LittleBlackBook91
That was me! 😢
What you describe is a clamourous woman, and the bible speaks about that. Her love language is service, by doing everything she felt everybody would like/love her and it was not just for Corey only. Friends, family and social media that was her problem. That to me is insecurities. I believe it all came to a head when she had her second child and I believe postpartum played a major part in it. Corey was very involve in taking care of his children so it was not that he totally neglected her to do everything.
Scripture please 🙏🏾
Proverb: 9:13.
@@chrishenry7303 thank you. I have a question I hope you’ll engage. I get how folly (foolish,senseless, gullible) and a clamorous (loud,confused, bringing attention to self in unruly ways) can be the result of a lack of (self and ultimately godly) knowledge and understanding as a woman but how did you make the connection with acts of service being the love language?
@@FindingNeli When someone constantly do things with the intention to be appreciated, validated or complemented for what they do all the time it takes away from the genuine nature of what they are doing. She felt if I do this or go the extra mile to do whatever they feel they needed to do, that people will love her more or appreciate them more.
Yes, love is demonstrated in your actions. However, if it is done unconditionallly you eventually reap the rewards of it. The rewards may not be right away but later when you least expected. Example.a mother who poures her heart and soul into raising her children the right way, may not see the benefits until the children are grown up and are handling their lives and may not see or understand what she was was trying to instill in them when they were younger. When those same children grows up and have children of their own only then they will tend to love and appreciate their mother.
Based on what she explained that she was a people pleaser, she was doing it to get validation, love and appreciation and can be considered clamourous (only) looking for attention and expect people to show appreciation for all she was doing.
she cant say what she really want to say about him
Isn’t he the guy that dances on TikTok ? 😅
Her childhood acting wasnt making her feel she's a servant responsible for the publics happiness you overanalysed there and gave an inaccurate description
Reports came out that she's a naturally jealous person, and that Corey actually paid the bills even though it was said that she did it. That she was jealous of something in Corey perhaps his potential. That's why he started to blow up when she got away from him.
Paid the bills with what money?
@@niecyh.1381 How do you know he had no money at all?
@@mobym337 whatever money he had during the marriage was not comparable to Tia’s. It’s not rocket science
I’m going tbh here but I know from two films-one with KeKe Palmer and the new Tyler Perry movie. There’s no way that he could pay any bills. He was a kept man. All he should have been doing is giving his wife love & support but somehow he managed to be resentment, vindictive & tiring. It makes no sense.
@@mobym337wasn't he seeking spousal support
I'm sick of HER! Like, what does she want from us🙄
@@sugasuga406 🤣🤣
😂
Another channel hating on women like we dont have enough on those… it takes two to tango..
@@ZayShinning ur new so I get it. This is part 2. Part 1 I blamed him.
She knew he was broke when she met him, she loved him unconditionally then. He sacrificed a lot of his career for the family too
. I think when she had the second child, she felt overwhelmed with being a mom taking care of the house. The kids and the carrer felt like she was taking care of everyone no for her. I could understand a lot of women feel like that post partum. But she should have loved him unconditionally and tried to work it out she had one child that's was very young, and she had already come from divorced parents. Out of nowhere, she wants to be selfish, dating around spreading her wing self love.
Being broke at 20 is different than at 40. Marriage isn't meant to be unconditional. The first thing you do when you get married is agree to conditions - vows. The marriage isn't even valid unless you sign a legal contract agreeing to be held to those conditions. To file for divorce, you typically file with the condition that was broken.
@Scott0588 they were married. When you make vows to marry, you love the person no matter what unconditionally through good and bad. She who wanted marriage, he wanted to wait. He sacrifice too. She knew what she was getting into.
@@emiliaessentials That belief is why marriages are failing and people go in with unrealistic beliefs. Marriage has very clear conditions. If the vows are broken, the marriage is broken, whether you stay together or not. "I vow to love unconditionally" is not said for a reason. We also can't absolve Cory. She could want marriage all she wants, if he wasn't ready, as a man, he should've stood on that. By passively going along with it, he took a submissive role.
@Scott0588 so what are the conditions?? Prople needs to think 2 or 3 times before committing to someone, especially if you have young children have more than one.
@@emiliaessentials The vows are the conditions! For example, "I vow to forsake all others" means you agree to remain faithful. If you cheat in the marriage, divorce paperwork would name infidelity as grounds for divorce because that was the condition that was broken. If you vow to honor and cherish your wife, then leave her to do the lion's share of the work at the expense of her health/wellbeing, I could see how that could lead to divorce, especially if you're at an impasse where either something changes or she consistently has an empty cup.