Divorce! Real Reason Meagan Good & Devon Franklin Broke Up | Dismissive vs Fearful Avoidant

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  • Опубліковано 10 лис 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 127

  • @caroladams8237
    @caroladams8237 3 місяці тому +56

    This was very informative. The examples show both a difference in attachment style and love language. Devon seems to like acts of service, whereas Meagan likes touch. The video also taught me that even when you marry the person GOD has chosen and the relationship has no infidelity, abuse, or financial issues, marriage is still a lot of hard work for 'success'.

    • @LittleBlackBook91
      @LittleBlackBook91  3 місяці тому +3

      U nailed it. Love the love language addition

    • @livingfreewithdee1189
      @livingfreewithdee1189 2 місяці тому +3

      I agree. GOD is the foundation, but we must continue to build, work, and pray together. Even with that will must continue to have support from our community with wise counsel.

  • @cloudandbloom
    @cloudandbloom 3 місяці тому +88

    The hate for Meagan is so pathetic! HE left her and ppl are blaming her and don't even know why they broke up.🤮

    • @LittleBlackBook91
      @LittleBlackBook91  3 місяці тому +8

      @@cloudandbloom where did u see hate?

    • @Mbuyiselo5
      @Mbuyiselo5 3 місяці тому +16

      @@LittleBlackBook91They are referring to the media coverage after they initially got divorced, not anything that was said in the video.

    • @LittleBlackBook91
      @LittleBlackBook91  3 місяці тому +5

      @@Mbuyiselo5 ooooh slam madness

    • @MissMadelineMM94
      @MissMadelineMM94 3 місяці тому

      She's not referring to your video she's talking about how the general public responded to the news.​@@LittleBlackBook91

    • @tamaramtl2024
      @tamaramtl2024 3 місяці тому +1

      Who was hating her ?

  • @hyunbinsdimple5803
    @hyunbinsdimple5803 3 місяці тому +11

    Initially I was very skeptical about your views on such a sensitive topic, but today you have won me over. I’m thoroughly impressed.

  • @KCoopp9
    @KCoopp9 3 місяці тому +12

    This is why you should never change for man. Only change for God.

  • @dpharrison7
    @dpharrison7 3 місяці тому +45

    Devon said he always said Yes when sometimes he should have said No, he is a people pleaser

    • @LittleBlackBook91
      @LittleBlackBook91  3 місяці тому +9

      Looks like it indeed u ain’t lie

    • @peppermintt3879
      @peppermintt3879 3 місяці тому +3

      Yes. I think so too. She pouted when he prompted her to move her legs while they sat on the couch...which to me was a weird position for them both. She was used to getting her way.

    • @TITA-n-Dimsum
      @TITA-n-Dimsum 3 місяці тому

      @@peppermintt3879you read that so wrong IMO… that situation doesn’t apply to his saying yes and people pleasing. He wasn’t reading the situation very well in terms of body language and him fixing her! That is the weird behavior on that scenario. You may also be avoidant too.

    • @peppermintt3879
      @peppermintt3879 3 місяці тому

      @@TITA-n-Dimsum Possibly...but in my EXPERIENCE, people who won't ttake no for answer don't always make it obvious. It can be a non-verbal type of manipulation that the isn't even detected. Like most of us, I don't know either of them well enough to know who does what. It's all alledged and in my opinion as well.

  • @cpalm5416
    @cpalm5416 3 місяці тому +34

    It’s interesting, how she changed all of those things for a human. When she should change certain things because God commands it.

    • @LittleBlackBook91
      @LittleBlackBook91  3 місяці тому +8

      Now u speaking oooh damn I never deeped that

    • @nessparadis6948
      @nessparadis6948 3 місяці тому +3

      Do you know that husbands are called to sanctify their wives? He’s probably a rare example of a husband somewhat doing that for a wife.

    • @ghutchin33
      @ghutchin33 3 місяці тому +4

      Russell Wilson said that when he saw Ciara in her Ride Video, God told him she was his wife but he had to “ save “ her.

    • @shalalala868
      @shalalala868 3 місяці тому

      @@ghutchin33 Russell is a carnal Christian

  • @azizabahati7037
    @azizabahati7037 3 місяці тому +1

    Thank you for providing some information to help me better understand how I show up in relationships. Bless!

  • @atarah2124
    @atarah2124 3 місяці тому +3

    Great video! So basically without childhood trauma healing, prayer will not be emough to keep two people together as the trauma rears it's ugly head into adulthood and will affect marriages and relationships. So it is extremely important to seek therapy to heal.

  • @Leeggss
    @Leeggss 3 місяці тому +25

    There was talk that she basically stopped acting during the marriage, and when she finally did it was in a very secular role, Harlem. She dimmed herself to keep him and I think that finally came to a head. He begin to feel neglected to her career because she set unrealistic expectations in the beginning. I believe it was also said that she changed her views on the agreed upon timeline for having children and starting a family.

    • @LittleBlackBook91
      @LittleBlackBook91  3 місяці тому +13

      @@Leeggss this is real because when I watch interviews she is all about her marriage. I think the church stuff broke her too. She was always going back to acting but I wonder if he expected her to be in more sanctified roles?

    • @nik-at-nite
      @nik-at-nite 3 місяці тому +1

      @@LittleBlackBook91I remember him saying he was going to crate roles for her since he was a producer. I wonder if that ever came into fruition.

  • @Conversationswithesther
    @Conversationswithesther 3 місяці тому +1

    Kojo you are absolutely blessed. I see the light of GOD in you and I love it because you are not perfect but you are a lover of Christ . Don’t STOP EVER ✋🏾 STOP . Question for you , did you go to school for this ?

  • @Sunfl0w33r
    @Sunfl0w33r 3 місяці тому +17

    19:39 from my observation it appears as if her knee that he moved was digging into his side. I know this from experience of awkwardly cuddling with my boyfriend 😂😅 and him having to reposition me so that he can be comfortable too cause I’d often lean into him without realizing that it’s not always the most comfortable for him. He typically will tell me that though rather than just moving me. I assume Devon didn’t tell her in the moment cause they were filming but he repositioned her and scooted into her to show that he wasn’t trying to create distance because he’s actually closer to her in the repositioned way. As a fearful avoidant myself tho I can tell that Meagan took offense to it rather than understanding that he just wanted to reposition so they BOTH can be comfortable. Being in that fearful mindset, you read into and assign meaning to things without thinking rationally about them.

    • @LittleBlackBook91
      @LittleBlackBook91  3 місяці тому +4

      Fair observation I like the way uve also interpreted what happened

    • @p9782
      @p9782 3 місяці тому

      I like your observation, though I see she didn't want her "V" toward the camera. LOL. He move her to that position purposely, it just happened and she felt awkward.

  • @MarquesaPettway
    @MarquesaPettway 3 місяці тому +7

    I appreciate what you said about intimacy, it’s an extremely important part of a marriage because it’s emotion based.
    Although Devon is a wonderful faith based speaker, I can see how he may have misunderstood the importance of emotional intimacy during his celibacy. I came close to marrying an emotionally unavailable man, until I forced myself to face my unhappiness. Knowing each other’s love language is valuable and telling. Lastly, how we grow up plays a huge role in how we live. My ex refused to face his childhood trauma, I begged him to get therapy, but he procrastinated and avoided it and his internal trauma was way too heavy for him to love or be loved. Megan feared being abandoned, like you said; Devon desired the daunting wife who would sacrifice everything for him. Reminds me of another love lesson, do not date potential, date and marry who they are now.

    • @Msdee321
      @Msdee321 Місяць тому

      Amen! 🙏🏽

  • @anned.2085
    @anned.2085 3 місяці тому +34

    Its interesting that you said they both have the same attachment style, but automatically assumed SHE was the one with mood swings, and was pulling childish games to test his love/loyalty etc. I also think that attachment style alone doesnt take into account the broader culture of men being "the prize" and "high value" in black culture, not to mention she was a pastors wife.

    • @LittleBlackBook91
      @LittleBlackBook91  3 місяці тому +8

      Dismissive and fearful AVOIDANTS are two different attachments. Fearful usually have mood swings. But mood setting is not the reason why this relationship went left

    • @ToriUptown
      @ToriUptown 3 місяці тому +8

      @@LittleBlackBook91Im a recovering fearful avoidant and you’re so right about the moods swings lol

    • @p9782
      @p9782 3 місяці тому +2

      Mood swings or fed up with childish temperament from a grown ssa man, a Minister/preacher??? Over a period of 9-10 years is a long time. IMO his ego and insecurity and her being the focus of attention were big issues. He thought he could handle it, but couldn't stand her fame and what came with it. I do hope he's happier with the lady he's dating. He was out of his league with Meg.🤷‍♀️

  • @Metaphysicalmindspace777
    @Metaphysicalmindspace777 3 місяці тому +41

    Devon gives “fluid” energy! Meghan would never have met all of his needs because he’s presents as very “feminized”! IMO

    • @diamond9223
      @diamond9223 3 місяці тому +9

      Is there evidence of this. If not, it's just a opinion.

    • @LittleBlackBook91
      @LittleBlackBook91  3 місяці тому +14

      Sounds mad but I actually agree he was raised with women

  • @kimdash444
    @kimdash444 3 місяці тому +6

    I think he's fighting his sexuality. He doesn't want to be but I think he's avoiding being gay. I agree with the attachment styles and the fear of abandonment.

    • @lcole3132
      @lcole3132 3 місяці тому

      I agree, especially when he talks about being intimate with her.

  • @ingfridh3553
    @ingfridh3553 3 місяці тому

    Thank you so much for this

  • @Jovialjay86
    @Jovialjay86 3 місяці тому +7

    This was so good! What books would you suggest to learn more about attachment styles?

    • @LittleBlackBook91
      @LittleBlackBook91  3 місяці тому +1

      I’d even start you on vision before books THAIS GIBSON AMAAZING AND BOOK WISE. Elvira Hoffman Attachment in Relationship

  • @heyitsmorenike_
    @heyitsmorenike_ 3 місяці тому +2

    6:52 this is such a good point Kojo! Damn! You can be celibate all you want but do you actually have intimacy (closeness) with your partner? Love this

  • @HopeAndrea_HFG
    @HopeAndrea_HFG 3 місяці тому +4

    Attachment styles are hard to break when they're toxic. I wish them both the best.

  • @Blahgirl283
    @Blahgirl283 3 місяці тому +5

    Look at that: the consequences of churches minimizing the importance of therapy because the Bible and God should be enough. And the importance of dealing with childhood wounds religious or no. Wish it worked out between them but can understand how they didn’t have enough tools to be there for one another long term.

  • @lilm225
    @lilm225 3 місяці тому +3

    Omg I’m dismissive 😢

  • @Fergalicious49
    @Fergalicious49 3 місяці тому +1

    People need to mind their own business and pray for everyone. You never know what people are going through.

  • @Blahgirl283
    @Blahgirl283 3 місяці тому +2

    This also makes the attaching so quickly and so hard to Jonathan Majors and people speculate she may have been the other woman in the texts and so guilt plays into it as well - but this explains a lot. Especially if she already may have had a fear of abandonment - her husband abandoning her and dissolving the marriage was probably traumatic. Not to mention, people blamed her and church people called her fast and all of that.

    • @Blahgirl283
      @Blahgirl283 3 місяці тому

      So she had no one to really talk to who would be able to counteract the internal shame and hurt and triggered fear.

    • @Blahgirl283
      @Blahgirl283 3 місяці тому

      This situation probably has nervous system all in disarray and her triggered self really needs Jonathan to be worth it even if we know he isn’t.

  • @Blahgirl283
    @Blahgirl283 3 місяці тому +1

    We all need unconditional love though. Within reason.

  • @HighlyFavoredHousewife
    @HighlyFavoredHousewife 3 місяці тому +14

    Question, so if she heard God that Devon was her husband, but now they’re divorced, is that not a contradiction? Hence, the vows are until death do us part.

    • @32redrubies
      @32redrubies 3 місяці тому +25

      Everyone has free will. It doesn't matter if it's God's will. If we are disobedient to God's will, it's the individual who suffers the repercussions.
      If you watched her full interview, she said she would have never left him because she knew what God told her. However, if Devon individually decided he wanted to leave, he's within his own right.
      God gives us our own choice. If he didn't, we'd all be living for him and following his precepts and principles right?

    • @midheaven_mimi
      @midheaven_mimi 3 місяці тому +12

      So she was the one that heard from God that he was her husband. He filed for divorce, not her. Sounds like to me she was willing to stay married till death do them part, but he filed for divorce so… 🤷🏾‍♀️

    • @HighlyFavoredHousewife
      @HighlyFavoredHousewife 3 місяці тому +1

      @@32redrubies understood! Thank you!

    • @niolab7
      @niolab7 3 місяці тому +4

      God anointed Saul to be king but Saul disobeyed God and God took His anointing from Saul. Are you saying God didn’t know Saul would act the way he did before he anointed Saul king ? The fact is that to God, only God, only (YHWH) is the prize - not your husband, career, Oscar nomination. So as long as He is still with you, you gucci

    • @32redrubies
      @32redrubies 3 місяці тому

      @@HighlyFavoredHousewife you're welcome!

  • @KimberlyReviews
    @KimberlyReviews 3 місяці тому +7

    17:57 him shifting her was awkward!

    • @ghutchin33
      @ghutchin33 3 місяці тому +4

      That shows just how controlling he most likely was in the marriage.

    • @kcfitness8710
      @kcfitness8710 3 місяці тому +2

      I think her knee was in his side and he was uncomfortable, it was ok for him to say so. He could have voiced this and allowed her to change the way she wanted to. That way he would be working with what she wanted also.

    • @tamaramtl2024
      @tamaramtl2024 3 місяці тому +1

      THAT is a dealbreker in my mind. Physical speaks louder than talk

    • @kcfitness8710
      @kcfitness8710 3 місяці тому

      @@tamaramtl2024 is it the fact he moved her rather than asked?

  • @victoriapierre9511
    @victoriapierre9511 3 місяці тому +7

    I believe religion may have contributed to their demise because he did not properly prepare her for the type of religious community she would be apart of.
    The SDA community is very rigid in our beliefs and many members can be of a disservice to someone who is trying to figure out their place within said community. I think Devon eventually realized that he was doing more harm to Megan than good and let her go out of Love. I can't speak to their attachment styles, but as an SDA myself, it's very difficult dating someone who is apart of that religious community if you are ignorant of it. 🤔

    • @LittleBlackBook91
      @LittleBlackBook91  3 місяці тому +2

      Wait are they SDA? I did not know. That’s a mad layer to add. Because I’ve met few SDA the rules are stringent and enforcing them is a lot. I never thought to see that side of things.
      How did u find out they are SDA?

    • @shalalala868
      @shalalala868 3 місяці тому +1

      @@LittleBlackBook91 Devon has talked about it a ton

    • @LittleBlackBook91
      @LittleBlackBook91  3 місяці тому

      I’m go search thank you 🙏🏿

    • @Michelle-vr7rx
      @Michelle-vr7rx 3 місяці тому

      Yes he had to let her go he realize she wasnt going to be the women he wanted she loved the world and Hollywood cant have the world and God you choose one and forsake the other.

  • @jenniferbarros7905
    @jenniferbarros7905 3 місяці тому +5

    Devon is very feminine compared to Jonathan

    • @p9782
      @p9782 3 місяці тому

      True but that does not make him homosexual. He may have tendencies emotional and manners like his mother, grandma and his Aunts.

  • @haryel5058
    @haryel5058 3 місяці тому

    Hey Kodjo ! Can you share your notes. I’ll appreciate to write everything on my diary😊

  • @natashatwine7818
    @natashatwine7818 3 місяці тому +2

    Can you do a video on why the heck she is with Jonathan Majors?

    • @LittleBlackBook91
      @LittleBlackBook91  3 місяці тому +1

      I WILL DO ONE AFTER PART 3

    • @ao6685
      @ao6685 3 місяці тому +2

      Exactly. To go from a Pastor to a man convicted of harrasment and assaulting an ex is wild. Interesting topic

  • @ezmereldagerard6999
    @ezmereldagerard6999 3 місяці тому +1

    DeVon and Meagan had decided in their 9th year of marriage to start a family. They posted videos on UA-cam about this and they both were excited happy. When Meagan went to see doctor she found out she could not have children. Within the same year DeVon filed for divorce as Meagan controversial Amazon LBQ series was premiering on Amazon prime.
    💔💔💔

    • @LittleBlackBook91
      @LittleBlackBook91  3 місяці тому +4

      wait are u serious...where is this information from?

    • @leandra5248
      @leandra5248 3 місяці тому +2

      ​@@LittleBlackBook91 this is not true

  • @Milyme83
    @Milyme83 3 місяці тому +2

    Generational

  • @Michelle-vr7rx
    @Michelle-vr7rx 3 місяці тому +1

    The best thing he could do was let her go he accepted things he should have never to keep her but at some point he realize she not the women he wanted.

  • @audreyamponsah4268
    @audreyamponsah4268 3 місяці тому +7

    So in this case how do they make the marriage work?

    • @HighlyFavoredHousewife
      @HighlyFavoredHousewife 3 місяці тому +4

      Prayer

    • @ka-ta-ya9565
      @ka-ta-ya9565 3 місяці тому +4

      @@HighlyFavoredHousewifedon’t you think they tried that for years…???

    • @LittleBlackBook91
      @LittleBlackBook91  3 місяці тому +6

      They both have to work at over communicating. Learning to give safe spaces. Learning each other triggers.

    • @NBnNC
      @NBnNC 3 місяці тому

      @@ka-ta-ya9565 exactly… wisdom & understanding applied through skills and forming new relationship habits

  • @ezmereldagerard6999
    @ezmereldagerard6999 3 місяці тому +2

    DeVon and Meagan divorced in their 9th year of marriage

  • @shirleyclark2226
    @shirleyclark2226 2 місяці тому +1

    He is a Christian man and he's save and he want a save wife so they can be on one Accord

  • @dennisrobinson8008
    @dennisrobinson8008 3 місяці тому

    Nobody remembers near the end of the situation that she was pulling away and Hollywood was offering her roles that would make him not look Legit in his current profession as a Minister? Also if you do not remember, they met in Hollywood working on HIS film because he was a Hollywood executive at the time.

  • @LifeofBoj
    @LifeofBoj 3 місяці тому +2

    Devon did what he had to do.

    • @jacks4009
      @jacks4009 3 місяці тому +10

      That was???

  • @tamaramtl2024
    @tamaramtl2024 3 місяці тому +1

    He did her a favor.

  • @bathroomdiaries5393
    @bathroomdiaries5393 3 місяці тому

    18:38 That was strange you can tell she was sitting comfortable ....nahh that woulda been a red flag like whats wrong with you kmt

  • @kl6205
    @kl6205 3 місяці тому +2

    Why would you use that pic of her in the thumbnail.. violation

  • @ezmereldagerard6999
    @ezmereldagerard6999 3 місяці тому

    💔💔

  • @ileenechols7447
    @ileenechols7447 3 місяці тому

    💖

  • @raerae8801
    @raerae8801 3 місяці тому

    I think she’s also an actress and she knows how to lean in because she’s done romantic scenes. I think her action comes into part with her relationships.

  • @dionnetillis
    @dionnetillis 21 день тому

    I don’t care what nobody say. He knew that she was not the right or appropriate person for him to marry. He wanted her so bad and I think he tried to shape her and mold her into what he knew he needed as a minister. Everybody could see that she wasn’t appropriate. How could he not see that? She also knew he wasn’t the right one. She never wanted to be a good little Christian wife she wants to be who she is today.

  • @Msdee321
    @Msdee321 Місяць тому

    I love ❤️ Meagan Good. She is beautiful and talented but she needs to realize her worth. There is no way she should be taking care of a grown ass man.. namely Jonathan Majors.

  • @ladytea697
    @ladytea697 3 місяці тому

    If he can’t emotionally attach to people, it would have been very difficult being married to him. He was probably cold & distant throughout the marriage. And I also think he allowed his congregation to bad mouth Megan and affect his view of her. Sadly, I don’t think this new relationship is any better for Megan.

  • @meritaibeth1365
    @meritaibeth1365 2 місяці тому

    There are only two sides to a human's personality: they either exhibit God's character, which you can see clearly in Jesus Christ, or Satan's character. Every other drawn up category only makes understanding humans that God created in His image and likeness complex. Once you read the Holy Bible to study God's character, you would see what He loves and hates. Also, you can study Satan's character in your Bible to see what he loves and hates. Thus, you can find and distinguish those traits in humans who are truly seeking help and know how to help them. Here, I do not mean Nephilims or Satanists who have chosen to be God's enemies and whom God considers His enemies. God's character can be summarized as righteous and just.

  • @tamaramtl2024
    @tamaramtl2024 3 місяці тому +1

    He pushed her away... Ooooffffff . She was his wife ..... He is a great speaker but I believe that actions speak volumes, Him pushing her away on camera on top of it means that he wanted her to back off. Cringy to watch. .

  • @djoyce2544
    @djoyce2544 3 місяці тому +10

    #1 he lowered his standards. She was everything he didn’t want, she smoked, did the whole Hollywood scene out there in the streets. He got caught up in lust and married the wrong woman for him. She’s not godly nor modest. She doesn’t match the vision God has for him. Unequally yoked. Look at his body of work…accomplished producer, Christian motivational speaker, Christian based movies, has a relationship with the Lord.
    Look at her body of work…typical for Hollywood…Jezebel roles, no boundaries, dressing like a street walker not a complementary partner to him.
    #2 She said God told her, that Devon was her husband. The Bible says a man chooses a wife. Not the other way around. God has an order to things that actually work. Devon didn’t choose her, she choose him first. Red flag.

    • @teasuno4255
      @teasuno4255 3 місяці тому +6

      She is an actress. You can't judge someone. Go back and reread your Bible because you are misinterpreting your passages. I think you have skipped some pages. Read the passages before the ones that you are interpreting incorrectly.

    • @djoyce2544
      @djoyce2544 3 місяці тому

      @@teasuno4255 Regardless of the profession, it doesn’t matter the goal is if you claim to be Christian which is what the actress communicated, there are many passages in the Bible that talks about what Gods standard are for His believers. For women one of which is modesty. Facts from the Bible that I suggest you study and read. Thanks

    • @teasuno4255
      @teasuno4255 3 місяці тому +1

      @@djoyce2544 When you judge others, which is not your place, you stand in judgement yourself of damnation and hell fire. Please reread your Bible. You are misguided.

    • @lifeasjazmin
      @lifeasjazmin 3 місяці тому

      You just spit some fire 🔥

    • @NameiEnnie
      @NameiEnnie 3 місяці тому +1

      You might wanna pipe down about what God did and did not tell these people. Unless He Himself told you that. God doesn't always work in ways we understand. So be careful to dismiss something or you could be calling God a liar indirectly. I get so shocked when people speak about God's intent so boldly. And it's always based on their own opinion. Like have you spoken to God about this? Did you pray and ask Him? Did He confirm this? Or you just came here typing with your own "authority"
      God won't always work in ways you can understand. So maybe logically it dint make sense. But knowing God works in Mysterious ways. I wouldn't be so quick to jump the gun and speak definitely over things I wasn't instructed

  • @nwandobabes6527
    @nwandobabes6527 3 місяці тому +4

    No children

    • @teasuno4255
      @teasuno4255 3 місяці тому +1

      People with children and without children have divorced. Having children does not guarantee that a marriage will be saved.