My day Where I Didn't Get Punched In the face....before 6 pm

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  • Опубліковано 8 січ 2025

КОМЕНТАРІ • 184

  • @denisemcdougal6445
    @denisemcdougal6445 2 роки тому +11

    He was so right about the cops. I lived through the same thing. All the cops did was take him outside and tell him behave!!!

  • @zanegrimm2697
    @zanegrimm2697 11 років тому +40

    my reaction would be the same, scream in fear and lock myself in the bathroom then climb out the nearest window and run like hell

  • @maddie507
    @maddie507 9 років тому +18

    LOOOL "Officers officers officers, I have a sugar imbalance"

    • @branwyns5452
      @branwyns5452 9 років тому +4

      AndiLovesGames "I made it up, he didn't actaully hit me"
      "MAN I HIT HER! I SWEAR I HIT HER! I know my rights. I'll wait for you guys in the car" *sashays away*

    • @maddie507
      @maddie507 9 років тому

      xD

    • @branwyns5452
      @branwyns5452 9 років тому +1

      AndiLovesGames And then they go to uncuff me "I HIT HER! I SWEAR I HIT HER! I know my rights. I'll wait for you guys in the car."

    • @maddie507
      @maddie507 9 років тому +1

      they take me to prisun, im 6'2 im blonde im tan...and i realize...

    • @branwyns5452
      @branwyns5452 9 років тому +1

      AndiLovesGames I'm a very pretty man...

  • @alexisgrunden1556
    @alexisgrunden1556 Рік тому +1

    _"Hello, this is Christopher Titus, there's a domestic- You know what, just lemme talk to Rick. ... Hey man, what's up? Yeah, she's doing it AGAIN!! ..Alright; I'll see you in a minute."_
    When you're on a first-name basis with the dispatchers, you *might* have a problem you should fix.. 🤣🤣🤣

  • @TheKhive
    @TheKhive 12 років тому +9

    His life is hard to live with.
    The shit that happenend to his family that he deals with.
    He is a Great Anti-Depressent!

  • @TheTrit0n
    @TheTrit0n 9 років тому +19

    If she did that after i smacked her, my mind would be thinking, "Oh shit, my girlfriend is a masochist, run!!"

    • @TheCorrodedMan
      @TheCorrodedMan 8 років тому +3

      Really?.i would've thought."maybe I should call the police and tell them it was a false alarm...."SEXY TIME!!!

    • @TheFrugalVideoGamer
      @TheFrugalVideoGamer 8 років тому +4

      Pretty sure that's what Titus did, what with locking himself in the bathroom.

    • @utryping
      @utryping 8 років тому

      Da Triton masochism isn't that bad, sadism is when you need to run

    • @TheTrit0n
      @TheTrit0n 8 років тому +1

      I'm a sadist, honey, that woman liked being hit, and she can pass it off as domestic abuse if he leaves her, which is why i say run, hell has no fury like a masochist woman scorned, she'll scream abuse, him saying it was consentual won't cut it for the cops.

    • @TheFrugalVideoGamer
      @TheFrugalVideoGamer 8 років тому

      Da Triton
      Of course, she also loved dishing out the punishment to him, what with the whole "cracked me in the face five times" portion.

  • @UpRoaryus
    @UpRoaryus 16 років тому +4

    Oh, Titus, I am in LOVE!....
    Laughter cures- especially when it makes you feel like you aren't alone in even the weirdest shit...

  • @AikoSmurfette
    @AikoSmurfette 11 років тому +6

    She goes, "This sonuvabitch hit me!" I go, "She hit me first!" Which didn work in third grade, NOT gonna work on the LAPD.

  • @hagertt
    @hagertt 16 років тому +12

    He's a funny psycho. It's good to have a change of pace once in a while and he's not like other comedians. He and Demetri Martin are just different and so funny.

  • @HPslash
    @HPslash 17 років тому +4

    hahahahahaha
    "I'm 6'2,I'm blonde,I'm wearing white,and I realize...I'm a very pretty man... So I made some new friends..." favourite quote ever XD loool

  • @Alexisxoxlove
    @Alexisxoxlove 17 років тому +7

    LMAO "I'm 6'2,I'm blonde,I'm wearing white,and I realize...I'm a very pretty man" The ending was funny, LOL just killed me

  • @missskittles93
    @missskittles93 17 років тому +5

    "but they'd have to come back...cuz those 2 had worked it out but the loser...was dead"
    lmao

  • @dantesblackrose13
    @dantesblackrose13 17 років тому +4

    lol i have this dvd and its so dammmn hilarious... i especially love the part where he goes "STOP BEING A WUSSAAHHHHHH!!!!!!!!" after he talks about he and his dads fight... it cracks me up every time... the first time i every saw that part i choked on dinner lol

  • @AlanHollow
    @AlanHollow 14 років тому +5

    "And like a real man, I locked myself in the bathroom."

  • @Kooly1
    @Kooly1 15 років тому +2

    Hey whoa hey whoa hey whoa... Heyyyyyyyy. You guys work this out.... we don't want to have to come back here. *Chik chik* lol

  • @mohnotone8598
    @mohnotone8598 10 років тому +12

    I got here from why jack went to prison

    • @sarahmshimunov
      @sarahmshimunov 10 років тому +2

      katherine Reyes LOL I watched that too. It's so much funnier than this!

  • @nancy6746
    @nancy6746 9 років тому +4

    one of the funnest guys you'll ever hear

  • @Armygrl159
    @Armygrl159 13 років тому +4

    she had a 180 I.Q... oh wait, mom had an 180 I.Q XD

  • @vampian420
    @vampian420 13 років тому +1

    its, its bookcase... as in, book?:3 i love that part:)

  • @mostgnarlydude
    @mostgnarlydude 17 років тому +1

    he has such impacking delivery....he is one great comedian...prolly the best like ever!

  • @billabam
    @billabam 17 років тому +1

    hey woa hey woa hey woa hey woa hey woa hey woa. LMFAO

  • @Dreed122
    @Dreed122 18 років тому +1

    "I'll wait for you guys in the car"
    Titus kicks ass!

  • @emogirlrocks131
    @emogirlrocks131 13 років тому +1

    HE HIT ME! SHE HIT ME FIRST! not gunna work in third grade not gunna work on the lapd"XD

  • @Metalthrasherz
    @Metalthrasherz 13 років тому +2

    Haha this dude is hilarious, always makes me laugh.

  • @DrDevilDD
    @DrDevilDD 12 років тому +1

    the one flaw about Titus is that he can't hold back his laughter.

  • @emilytoney4745
    @emilytoney4745 10 років тому +2

    this makes me feel better when im mad or sad

  • @simsgirlgem
    @simsgirlgem 17 років тому +1

    hey woah hey woah

  • @Nexus5001
    @Nexus5001 18 років тому

    "hey this is christopher titus, there's a domestic..ah jus let me talk to rick." LOLOLOLOLOLOL! he roks!

  • @Ogre302
    @Ogre302 9 років тому +6

    So he dated Rhonda Rousey? Oh... 180 IQ...

    • @Mayonidas05
      @Mayonidas05 9 років тому

      before or after she lost?

  • @corinneiscool
    @corinneiscool 17 років тому +1

    i sware i can hardly breath right now, the ending was the fucking best ever;D i'm gonna cry

  • @Exaggeratedreality
    @Exaggeratedreality 17 років тому

    XD When Chris is groping himself he looks like some kind of uke jail bait.

  • @CPT85
    @CPT85 8 років тому +7

    And you thought your relationships were dysfunctional.

  • @dk5388
    @dk5388 16 років тому +1

    i agree no man should EVER!!!...hit a woman, until the 5th time she cracked him in the face lol that was great

  • @Lycan4
    @Lycan4 17 років тому +1

    When the geograhpy changed, my God, it was a FUCKING NIGHTMARE!!

    • @andrewhunt1328
      @andrewhunt1328 2 роки тому

      I gotta admit. First time I saw this, did NOT see that one coming

  • @agentsmithversion2
    @agentsmithversion2 17 років тому

    Why isn't this on dvd????!!!!!!

  • @gamerdude7100
    @gamerdude7100 13 років тому

    Arcadefox did the best job on his animation based on this, even titus agrees

  • @neatherskeloton2395
    @neatherskeloton2395 9 років тому +23

    "now I don't think a man should EVER hit a woman......until the 5th time shes cracked him in the face...so I hit her, open handed and regret it cause it wasn't as hard as I could've man." omg I agree with that XD( but u still shouldn't hit a woman)

    • @jennybyrne7322
      @jennybyrne7322 9 років тому +2

      +Neather skeloton Unless the "women" are Casey Anthony & Jodi Aris! Then you can do what you like w/ those witches! ~

    • @jennybyrne7322
      @jennybyrne7322 9 років тому +3

      +Tyler Grooms I agree 100%! CT's "Girl" had this coming! What was he supposed to do?

    • @jennybyrne7322
      @jennybyrne7322 9 років тому +1

      Tyler Grooms I love this bit! What goes around, comes around! & CT's "Girl-friend" was NO lady! Deserved!

    • @jennybyrne7322
      @jennybyrne7322 9 років тому +2

      Tyler Grooms I just love Christopher Titus.... He's so HONEST! I remember the 80's T.V show Cheers, Diane VS Sam in a slap fight! That was the best!

    • @ryliealderman566
      @ryliealderman566 9 років тому

      yes you should dude I have been hit soooo many times and when I get hit I laugh and say do it again and I'm a woman

  • @gringo335
    @gringo335 16 років тому

    you cant make shit this bizarre up...lol thats what makes it really funny

  • @cshgeo
    @cshgeo 15 років тому

    The Fifth Annual End of The World Tour (2007) Comedy Central Records

  • @saitoghost
    @saitoghost 18 років тому

    "BUT THE LOSER WAS DEAD" ROLMFAO

  • @logan00721
    @logan00721 16 років тому

    hes the funnyest comic ever

  • @Dareman15
    @Dareman15 16 років тому

    "My god it was a fucking nightmare"

  • @stickzrockerondrums
    @stickzrockerondrums 17 років тому

    dude chris RULES!!!!!!

  • @CazexXSMTCXx1
    @CazexXSMTCXx1 13 років тому

    Can't help but laugh wen it reached 3:42

  • @denisemcdougal6445
    @denisemcdougal6445 2 роки тому

    I love him.

  • @GaelSeer
    @GaelSeer 17 років тому

    no just let me talk to rick

  • @ryliealderman566
    @ryliealderman566 9 років тому +4

    I'm six two I'm blond I'm wearing white pants I'm a very pitty man XD XD XD XD XD.

  • @Smokestacktics
    @Smokestacktics 17 років тому

    Dude. # 1 all comedians steal a little from each other. it's just the nature of the buisness. even titus took some of his material from old jokes and made them new age and outrageous.

  • @pink3puppy
    @pink3puppy 16 років тому +1

    "i smacked her..open handed....and i regret it :( ....becase it wasent as hard as i culd have >:(

  • @Sephiroth1025
    @Sephiroth1025 17 років тому

    where did u download this?

  • @WesGTheFootballGuy
    @WesGTheFootballGuy 9 років тому +3

    I'm a very pretty man...

  • @circecatismycat
    @circecatismycat 17 років тому

    hes a very pritty man lol

  • @mostgnarlydude
    @mostgnarlydude 17 років тому

    i think a man should never hit a woman...until the fifth time she cracks him in the face....cuz i smacked her...open handed...and i regret it...cuz it wasnt as hard as i could oh man i.....this is seriously the funniest thing i have ever heard!!!!!!

  • @badflamer
    @badflamer 13 років тому

    @cshgeo i hope you don't mean that that was when this was taped

  • @carlmorgan5751
    @carlmorgan5751 8 років тому

    funny as hell an true

  • @wtf58
    @wtf58 17 років тому

    i have a suger embalance! lmao!! NO DIEBIETIES IS A SUGAR EMBALANCE!!!

  • @tx.sweetheart83morgan67
    @tx.sweetheart83morgan67 9 років тому

    Love it

  • @raeuch
    @raeuch 13 років тому

    @timbodaclown Norman Rockwell is Bleeding

  • @jumpinjax2
    @jumpinjax2 17 років тому

    Lemme talk to Rick :)

  • @afropuffjake
    @afropuffjake 17 років тому

    THANK YOU!! :D

  • @powerrangerofdoom
    @powerrangerofdoom 18 років тому

    im a very pretty man...
    ...and i made some new friends.
    god i love titus

  • @circecatismycat
    @circecatismycat 17 років тому

    pritty man lol hes so funny

  • @EmoSniper1313
    @EmoSniper1313 18 років тому

    :D yes he is a pretty man

  • @alucard4052
    @alucard4052 9 років тому

    lols

  • @Jimmyboygohome
    @Jimmyboygohome 2 роки тому

    Watching this during the Johnny Depp vs amber heard trial is weird

  • @birdman44
    @birdman44 17 років тому

    3:41-4:05=a very awkward part

  • @jthecarpenter
    @jthecarpenter 17 років тому

    not hitting a woman, on the pure basis that she is a woman, just goes against their hole equal rights movement. lol

  • @cjvs1604
    @cjvs1604 17 років тому

    you put titus on the same pedestal as mencia and spade? you have ALOT of problems man

  • @mangobomber360kick
    @mangobomber360kick 12 років тому

    Lol

  • @applemask
    @applemask 17 років тому

    Cos I don't take any shihaahahahahaha

  • @zilaxia
    @zilaxia 8 років тому +2

    SO OLD OMG

  • @fireflocs
    @fireflocs 8 років тому +6

    Don't act like domestic violence mandatory arrest laws are a good thing, Titus. Especially when you're the one being unjustly arrested. A man defending himself should not be a violent offender.

    • @fireflocs
      @fireflocs 8 років тому +11

      Not relevant in the slightest.

    • @zhishangdi3522
      @zhishangdi3522 8 років тому

      attomatic assumtion that he was the one who started the domestic violence but people dont relize that men can get be victoms of it too from ether physical or mental abuse which it seems like he was subjected to both just because you are a strong person does not mean you get the right to treat your other like they are lesser then your self being strong is not putting other people down it is helping them when they need a hand up it is also the same deal with rape a man can be raped just like a women can but that is a different topic so this is the end of my rant hope you learned something if it is something you knew then good i am glad you already knew it.

  • @timwrestler
    @timwrestler 13 років тому

    @kennycupcake16 yeah just a little funnier

  • @movingrivers
    @movingrivers 12 років тому

    Lol