How to Ruin Crab Legs 101 with KingCobraJFS
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- Опубліковано 11 кві 2024
- Uploaded on April 9th 2024. Sorry no chat highlights, he pre recorded this video with no live chat.
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KingCobraJFS channel / kingcobrajfs
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He got the crabs from Jessica
lul
😂😂😂😂 this should be the top comment 😂😂😂😂
Lmfao underrated comment!!!
It balances out the herpes nicely. TWU toobs.
lol, good one
How to turn crab legs into puree. Step 1. Grab some mead and a can of duster.
Yeah he sounds hyper dusted up in this video
Step 2 TMDWU toobz
Imagine wasting all that money to 'troll' a guy who clearly wastes all money given to him..
Two cans please.
🤣😭 this shit had me cryin
He's always sitting in front of the stove drinking beer like he's bbqing 😂
his brain is barbecued
@@Sheahovamore likely microwaved. Cobra likes to park it in front of the microwave and put his face against the window to watch the food spin.
Bogeque
😂😂 Like someone drunk uncle who doesn't know how to cook but will keep throwing out tips and advice lol
@@FoB952 only in 30 second bursts trole!!!
Remember folks “the white wine has a really nice white wine consistency to it”. TMDWU
TWU
Poor crab gave it's life to become that abomination. Better than being glued to a stick i suppose.
People glue crabs to sticks?
@@CrackinJacks138 Some people glue praying mantises to sticks. And what are crabs? Praying mantises of the sea!
😅😅😅
@@CrackinJacks138 you must be new here
@@CrackinJacks138 sounds nasty, im from the gulf coast and wont cosign that.
Wouldve been so much better with 2 cups of garlic butter on the side, but i digress.
It iz wat it iz toobs
Buuuuuut...
😂💀
As it turns out he just plated them up and ordered $50 worth of pizza. Couldn't even be asked to pretend to eat just a nibble... which is probably down to the fact that someone who can't innately understand the physics of can openers, likely can't open snow crab legs without a mallet
And having overcooked them for literally like 20x too long might be a factor in there too
I love how at the end he just shows his Taco John's on the counter, just gave up on maintaining the appearance that he did anything but convert that from food to inedible mess
Not you again
"Gonna watch that like a hawk"
An audacious claim, from a man who physically, is only capable of watching like a chameleon.
White wine and bud light 4 hour boiled crab legs. Not even sailors from the 17th century would eat this
I don't even think the bc era would eat this.
@@fandude666😹😹💀
They couldn’t eat it because after four hours of boiling crab, the meat would be so tough and rubbery it would be impossible to eat.
@@CLB___ It could be sliced into small pieces and swallowed. Impossible to chew but still edible.
@@djhenyo hahah
As his upper teeth fade into complete nubs, his slur seems to get more and more pronounced
Yettttthhhh yeeeetthhh it doethhhhhh
But i digrethbthth
That and his gums are probably crazy swollen.
Lolol
Brain: mush
Teeth: mush
Crab: mush
The duster has slowed his brain down to a crab crawl
Crab legs for a crab brain
I noticed he didn't eat the crap legs. Instead he ordered out from taco johns. I think if he stopped wasting food and alcohol he could actually build his Clock Tower Dreamhouse
The volume of money that passes through his trotters is truly something to behold
No he will win the lottery first and then have the clocktower house!
@@RippDrive the bills add up when you require an entire bottle of wine and two bottles of beer to cook every meal. Plus the everclear for a nightcap!
He didn't buy the crab, someone sent him it. He can't use a can opener, how do you think he would open crab legs?
@@donkeyhands8809I thought he was going to gnaw on them with his little black boglim teef stumps
That stove is super old, I love it. Old appliances are so much more reliable. They built things with the intention that it could be repaired back then
Same with cars.
That honestly is pretty cool to see. TWU for real
i wish i had controls like that on my stove lol
He might just be the most confident idiot in the world. It's like he insists on doing things the wrong way because people want him to do right.
He Reminds me of a 40k Ork.
Dumber than Bag of Rocks, but enough Blind faith to Move a Mountain with a Terrible guitar riff.
DSP might have a shout there too.
@FreakyFriday4Phaggs I was going to say 'How dare you disgrace orks like that?' But you are totally right
Oppositional Defiance Disorder coming in nicely toobz.
@@bartacus4872he honestly doesn't. I always see people trying to shoehorn in dsp. He is a trash person. But there's very little in this world as bad as cobes.
"Gonna watch it like an hawk" 4 hours later... 👁👄👁
100% chance he’s gonna make mead out of that crab juice
Dude, don't give him ideas. I am going to throw up
Move over Clamato
Jfc 🤢
Only Josh can make it look like hes boiling a xenomorph
That dog collar is an $80 taco order away from fitting like a turtleneck, cuhz.
I sense great vulnerability, a man-child crying out for love, an innocent orphan in the postmodern world.
When cooking crab legs you want to taint the meat
he probably graped the crabs first dood
Marooned on an island, a pirate makes the best of the situation with a pot of boiled wine and crab broth. 🏝️ 🏴☠️ 🦀
That cracked me up.
Bro does look like a sea of thieves character 😂
😂 fckn Dying !! Sea of thieves
He then took all the grain alcohol for sterilizing his drinking water and made a dank drink combo arrrg
I rarely ever comment but this made me laugh so hard!
At least he’s doing something with his life, you know?
To be a true waste of space you’d have to sit in a bathtub for 15 hours. And that… is not what’s up.
I'M WASHING MY FACE
@@lilsadb0iI DIDN’T DO ANNYTHIIIIIIIINNNGGGGGGG
What did she do?
@@MillywiggZ nothing trole!
Her new boyfriend is the toilet cause it can listen to her for hours without talking
Those were pre cooked crab legs btw lol
😂😂😂
So idk if you’ve ever bought or caught and cooked crab yourself but yea crabs are most of the time pre cooked because of the toxins they release in the body upon death. So they are cooked typically by freezing the crab to make it sleep then putting it in boiling water to flash kill and cook it. But if you kill it you can wait typically up to an hour or two but no more and cook it.
That's my favourite part
My grocery store sells pre cooked crab legs, all you have to warm them.
Because of course they were. XD
He needs to be in a group home where he can host Bogtail parties for the other residents.
Terrible idea.
They don't have his circle of protection from the botulism, toobz
The scurvy and scabies will burn through the home before his 14hr slurry gets 'done'
@@Solanin0803 haha, I stand corrected
@@Solanin0803 he’d be accompanied by a direct support professional in a group home during every step. One of our more difficult little fellas tried making “acid” from mixing dish soap, windex, and vinegar so he could dissolve the door to the staff room.(I know…. Vinegar is an acid… we told him after he was done fuming).
that’s why we don’t keep bleach or ammonia in the same house, or really anything that shouldn’t be mixed together.
Eating like a king, but no castle
Clock tower dream house
King of White Castle
Clock tower caravan already happening.
King of the wasteland
Yeah, he was evicted from it
Troles struggling to afford Top Ramen while the KING is FEASTING on crab legs. TMDWU
He didn't eat any of that.
@@TBLUNTZ420hes just Flexing on us
He didn't even buy it his "fan" sent it in
I couldn't be more jealous of m'bog
rich get richer smh
The kinda guy to describe everclear as "great alcohol"
My God
Who sent Everclear?
It makes your mead taste a little less like jenkem, toooobz
@@mountainclawoutdoors Yeah Ive been waiting for the day that Cobes discovers Everclear.. sadly i fear this might be his last week.. if the alcohol poisoning doesn't get him, he's gonna fall and bump his noggin..
Someone needs to doordash him a helmet STAT
I think he tried to say grain alcohol but his teeth blocked the shot.
I started the video and thought to myself, “At least he didn’t make crab mead with it.”. After the bud light plat and the wine, I realized he kind of did.
Ah yes a fine way to leave the apartment you've got two weeks to vacate. They could probably use the smell in there treat long covid smell recovery
Butter and not country crock… Jessica’s influence is taking him over
He’s become her Simp
Good.
County crock is horrible for you
He’s using butter instead of margarine… the west has fallen. It’s so over.
"You should eat better, Josh"
Bog goes and buys expensive crab legs. TWMDU
If you were paying attention, trole, then you’d know the crab legs were sent from a fan. But I digress
I love how he can never just boil something. He either has to boil it in something weird like beer or mountain dew or add a bunch of crap to the water and make bog stew
More is better. Always.
That’s the Boglim way
Water just doesn’t taste good without alcohol. TWU
Boiling pre cooked crab legs in anything for this long (spoon added for flavor) is the cherry on top
Alot of people boil seafood in beer. I personally like beer can chickens you just shove a beer can up the chicken and let it steam.
With that said i dont know what this abomination is.
for crab so nice, cook it thrice 🦀🦀🦀
First time Ive seen him use actual butter instead of fucking margerine
for real.. so many people think countrycrock soy margerine is butter..
thank NaL
I’m not even vegan but his food “hacks” makes me feel bad for the animals that lost their lives and had to be turned into slop
and they dont even get eaten.. well not by human larvae anyway
Same here. It's one thing to appreciate and honor the animal by cooking a delicious meal out of it but to do this is just flat out disrespectful and borderline mean lol. I have never even heard of someone fucking up crab legs this bad.
We all turn into a slop when we die, cobra is just a decomposer. He doesnt eat it, just breaks it down with heat. He is filling his niche in the food chain
Think of all the dumb wasteful food videos on the net.
Restaurants waste food everyday you feel bad for those animals too?
the trolls sending him everclear is just plain diabolical😂😂😂 i love how hes completely clueless to the fact that crablegs come pre cooked
They don't always. But yes those are cooked
There's a difference between who sells or where it's processed. I get crab right from my local harbor an it's usually like shrimp where starts off Grey an turns pink ish when cooked. But unlike shrimp prime season Dungeoness is extremely sweet and makes amazing po boys
@@dethmedic52 I'm from Oregon, Dungeness crab is so plentiful here it's super cheap. Prime season I can get a whole good size Dungeness for about 5$, or just Dungeness legs/crab meat for 1.89 a pound. I only buy whole Dungeness when I feel up to processing and cooking it. Otherwise I just buy the meat already cooked and chilled/frozen to use for pastas or crab cakes
@@nicolebrock2012 very good, I use to live in Brookings so I'm familiar. Now I'm in Cali but even though a little pricey still can be found easily if know who to ask
10lbs of butter, a bottle of wine, a bottle of beer and a stove from the 1970s, Toobz
No, half a bottle of garlic powder will balance all that out nicely🧄🧄
@@OOspazOO🤣🤣
A delicious concotion TWU
Don’t forget the half bottle of lemon juice.
Don't call country crock butter lmao
Bro he turned that crab into an alcoholic
Red Lobster employee here… this is the exact recipe they use in the restaurant.
6:14 the spoon is also in the recipe book
Jourp: Boils crab for hours
also Jourp: "it's not gunna overcook it"
All it would have taken is a quick google search to find out that it only takes 5-6 minutes to cook crab legs.
@@CLB___ and the fact that these crab legs were already PRECOOKED. All he had to do was warm them up.
Now now, he watched it like a HAAAAK.
Clearly nothing can go wrong whenever your WATCHIN LIKE A HAAAAAK
Don't be fooled by how he ordered $50 worth of pizza, he surely opened those crabs legs like an old pro, ate them all, and they were delicious
@@nicknickson3650come on now, reheat a thing, or heat a thing for two hours and change in a bowl crammed with half boiling water, half random kitchen ingredients.... either sounds fine to me
@@nicknickson3650 oh shit, you're absolutely right!!!!🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
he did the same thing with already cooked wings before too
We’re gonna call this dish “Neptune’s Terrible Horrible Very Bad Surprise”
The cheap watery American beer really brings out the crab flavour
@@silvertain1978 Hey, Dylan Mulvaney personally pissed in that bottle!
That's not a surprise, that's a mistake
When he tries to explain the flavor profile like a chef “the sweet from the wine is going to balance out the salty from the garlic powder… and sour of the lemon juice.”
Yup that’s how flavor profiles work Josh, you got it.
This regard probably thinks that adding alcohol will get him drunk, not realizing that the alcohols boils away first
For sure.. exactly why i called people who give him things dentheads.. its all wasted... crab legs, at the price.. total flush of a FULL tank of gas for the troll
Actually, Only 85% of alcohol is boiled out of alcohol. that's why when I went to Culinay school, we didn't use any alcohol in our cooking due to a lot of ex addicts took the course.
Well that depends. What type of alcohol are you using, are you cooking with a closed lid in a stew kind of setting? The amount of alcohol retained in a dish is pertinent to way of cooking, type of alcohol and quantity. After an hour of cooking the way slimelord does here about 75% of the alcohol will have cooked of. Something to keep in your mind when cooking for recovering alcoholics who may find that even a hint of booze is off putting. Have a good one
Platinum is NA bud
He's aware, he's said it before. Maybe he just can't live without the taste of alcohol in his mouth
"This white wine tastes like white wine." - King Cobes 2024
Make the whiiiiite wiiiiine come out agaaaain
Should've put them in Jessica's bath first, let them marinate for half a day with her juices
I'm about to eat and I see this comment
Ewwwwww 😂
The Double Crab and Fish Juice Mead, the one all Boglims dream of 😂😂
😫🤮
I just shit myself...
"the liquith ith thlowly boiling the crableths"
😂😂😂😂
deliciouth dankneth toobth
Just scrollin down, saw this and legit laughed out loud.
I wonder if those legs ended up in the trash
Yes they ended up inside the boglims mouth
@@joshuathomas2197LOL
Ruin is such a strong word.... I prefer "turned into unbearable nasty goop that even Nurgle would turn down"😂😂😂😂😂
Maybe he could add it to nurgles rot 2.0? Could be on to something there! Praise the grandfather!
He is the perfect example of Nurgle's Rot. Man is build like a Plague Marine with the stuff he consumes and just doesn't feel any of the side effects 😂😂
I'd love for somebody to 3d print/paint a boglim plague marine it would be perfect
@seanthunell5060 either a Plague Marine or a Nurgling with his hat to go with it. You bet I would pay top dollar for that 😂😂
Mortarian not looking like the best candidate for leader of the death guard now boglims around 😅
The landlord is gonna love that grease pit behind the stove 😂
What's another few thousand in damages? HE won't be paying for it.
normal peeps = steam them for about 5-7 mins..... cobes = boil them for about 2 hrs in beer and a bottle of sweet wine yeessssth doodt!
Thank God he used real butter. It would've turned out bad otherwise
I wonder if the white wine has a white wine consistency 🤔
🎶At the cobras cantina the crab legs are green-a🎶
Ah yes... this white wine has notes of white wine with a lingering aftertaste of fermented grapes
@@ext93would compliment a white choclate really well, since they are both white
@@ext93the colour is really coming through in the flavor yessmhm
I mean it's possible it could have a white wine taste but who knows
Those are discounted crab legs. Grocery stores only tray them like that when they're about to go bad. Not like it'll affect the man who ate 3 day old counter sushi.
Nah not necessarily. That doesn't make any sense. You don't package stuff that's almost bad.
@@TBLUNTZ420you ever shop at Walmart? Lmao
@@TBLUNTZ420you do however put reduced meats on a styrofoam gray/black trey and wrap it in cling film and slap a price sticker on it. I'm from Ireland. Not even the same country but we do the exact same thing
@@TBLUNTZ420...when it comes to meats & seafood they do. It removes the older product from the area where newer product is, and makes them “easier” to buy when its packaged already.
More expensive meats and seafood are not prepackaged, they are packaged to order.
@@TBLUNTZ420 trust me, I used to work in the Winn Dixie seafood department. All crab legs come precooked frozen. To get the best quality crab, don't even buy the ones in the display case. Ask to have some brought from the freezer in the back.
I think I'd name this stream "how to avoid your crazy girlfriends crazy meltdowns"
It’s hilarious knowing that while he was doing this, Nal was having a complete mental breakdown.
@@rumham7466 when is she not tho
@@electravance right but I mean from the perspective of having been watching her stream live on JM channel, and meanwhile seeing him casually come in her chat, mid meltdown, and post a soap link. Totally ignoring her drama. Also then seeing he was in the middle of cooking. Anyway ya had to be there I guess
@@rumham7466makes me happy knowing this
Butter and liquid, staples of cooking
Would love for Gordon Ramsay to review his food hacks.
he might learn how to make a grilled cheese TMDWU TOOBES
Can we tag GR in these videos somehow? Sorry, I'm social media regarded.
It’ll happen eventually
I still have the hopes a psychologist will react to him someday. The jessica arc would be a great one
Ramsay would hang himself at the sight of cobras crab legs.
Dude boiled already cooled crab for hours?!
He also recently cooked already-cooked Tyson chicken at least three times.
Boiled crab legs for 4-8 minutes
King Corba version 4 hours
I can't with him 🤦🤦🤦
I’ve said it a thousand times by now and I’ll say it a thousand more. The way he makes his food is one of the most intriguing manifestations of something caused by autism that I thinks I’ve seen, lol.
Overnight you mean haha
They were already cooked
Can’t what?
cobra wins again trrrrole
Gothic crab slop
Good to see he's all packed and ready to move out. TMDWU
That's nips job
what is tmd?
@@dertythegrower TMDWU = That's most definitely what's up
@@DefNotAdog Always good to have a hoarder pack for you.
"You don't need a whole lot of this"...... As he pours more
1:41 McCormick’s seasoning must be a sponsor now!
“All of that brew and wine is going to seep into the cracks and *taint the meat, that’s what I’m hoping anyways.”*
God I miss the old Tony days....
meat taint TMDWU
Can’t believe he didn’t use the Frank’s red hot buffalo ranch seasoning
@@lucast3006must be out of the processed bacon grease too
Yeah he didn't say NOT A SPONSOR 😮
SNOWCRAB LEGSSTHHH OF DANKNESSTTHHHH
Truly gloriouthshhhh
Those poor crabs don’t deserve to be dishonored like this.
100% I actually feel bad for the poor crab. It's one thing to make a delicious meal and while respecting the crab but to create this abomination is just next level disrespect to the creature.
Poor bastard crabs
@@goldfingershat
bro which video was the poor bastard kid one again? i wanna see it again 😂😂
I feel like 95 percent of the meals he makes he always put some damn beer 😅
99 percent I reckon.
I wonder if he used to see Clint make up beer brats and got the idea in his head that you can cook everything with beer.
Somedys he sounds like steve brule
For your mead, ya dangus!
@@fdelm 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Nothing says fresh delicous crab legs like being 1000 miles from the ocean
Unless you live in the arctic circle there’s no chance you’re getting “local snow crab”
I love how old bay, an actual fucking seafood seasoning is in frame for the entire video yet this regard uses every other spice in his cabinet BUT THAT.
Also im glad that the white wine he tasted has a really good white wine consistency.
It also takes less than 10 mins to boil crab legs.
It's an intentional easter eggs, he's a master film genius on the level of Kubrick.
Boiling a spoon for extra flavor .Hes 4 steps ahead doodz 😂
all he needed was a Bud Lite a lil water & Old Bay steam for 15 min.
Funniest thing is, if you look close there is an Old Bay seasoning container that he didn't even consider using lmao
😅@@stacheoperator
This!!! Like any time he cooks I think oh something simple this time right????
Nah fam we taking crazy legs an just fuggin em up 😂
@@elbotravels1428 4:07 lmao perfect shot for anyone who didn't see it
4:22 he’s boiling them in the dirty soapy dish water leftover from when Jessica cleaned the kitchen
Liver failure coming in nicely tubes everclear is no joke son
And now he's making Riot Juice, he really is the lost Always sunny character.
Cobra and rickety cricket are pretty much the same person 😂
A McPoyle
Definitely feels like a character that would show up for an episode or two before returning to the Boglim Den to go back to his rants after inevitably getting banned from Patty's.
@@njh2os
"Charlie found a Ghoul"
@@njh2os*Paddy’s
Stewed crab legs lol. Man I wish he would have uploaded the trying it video. Would have loved to see him crack them and try and take the meat out. He’s never had them before
he has to let it sit out for 3 days before eating it.
It probably smelled too awful for him to try.
Can you imagine him using pliers or something from his work bench possibly hammer, it'd be on the level of his breaking or thinking all his 5 can openers are broke or don't work for that type of can. I remember when he did get the can open he cut on the outer side of the can.
You know they where stuck like chuck
I love watching Josh struggle to upload 4 videos of him trying to make crab legs all the while in the process of being evicted, then my saving grace boglim chronicles will flawlessly upload a video encapsulating all 4 videos in one with great detail. Thank you boglim chronicles! Your service to my happiness in greatly appreciated TWU
9:45 lobster abusing sicko confirmed
He finally got some actual butter, tmdwu
Gotta fill pot completely full. Regard
I just like the fact he got very drunk.
Well, it’s 5pm somewhere trole. 😂
I love how he never measures anything like a complete madman!
Pre cooked crab legs....literally only needed to be warmed up. Boy cooks them to slush. He is the walking embodiment of fucking up a wet dream.
"Theres not a whole lot of everclear in there" *proceeds to dump 4 shots in the cup 😂
I too enjoy a consistent white wine
Consistently white? Or consistently wine?😂
Pre-cooked crab legs, simply steam and serve with garlic butter. Naw dude, let's boil it and breakdown any meat into nothing, chew on the shells to ensure healthy strong teeth. TMDWU
The worst part of this is that, in theory, a lot of what he used can be used to make a really nice boiled or steamed crab. But he doesn't possess the technique to pull it off properly. Crab poached in white wine and butter with a squeeze of lemon would be fantastic.
“A littttttle bit of garlic powder in there”
Uses 1/4 cup of garlic powder
9:53 who is tickling lobsters at a restaurant??
He always says a splash, but its more like a pint!
What a regard. For some reason, this video perfectly sums up Jorb. All he had to do was put the crab legs on a fucking baking sheet, and baked them with a tent of aluminum foil on top. Crab legs are literally as easy to make as a stoffers dinner. But he does this.
He didn't even need to do that. Could've literally just washed and ate them in 5 minutes.
Today I learned about the crab leg weight spoon.
TWU 🦀
this guy lmfao
Do you think after he boiled them to toxic sludge, he got done, went to turn on the camera to own the trolls by devouring his ungodly creation, and at that moment realized that he has no idea how to eat crab legs? He left them alone and ordered tacos. Good job BOY!
9:38 Lobster tickling
He is such a Regard.
His “trolls” should give up trying to send him food and just send him duster- at least he will actually use it….
The random close-up of him trying the wine was fucking hilarious
The poor stove, being vintage it’ll never break…but I’m sure it’s wishing it were dead.
Better not be tickling the lobsters boy!
He thinks the oven is only used for cookies lmao.
He could've easily baked these.
He's made tons of things in the oven like wings, chimichangas, and pork ribs. Don't be ignorant.
@@djhenyoburritos
“Feelin kinda thathhhyyy” oh we know you dainty king
4:17 that can of Old Bay on the counter lookin' awful lonely today
We’ve all seen the sexy zoom-in of the splash shot right?
The way that carbonised black grease hit the wall, not for UA-cam trooooollllllez ask your mom and pop to show you when you grow up hahaa!
I love watching regards cook.