“I’m Angry She Abandoned Me” | Doing The Work With Byron Katie
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- Опубліковано 3 гру 2022
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Its difficult to do deep work in front of an audience. ESPECIALLY IF THEY LAUGH . Shame is always at the core, and that is a difficult emotion to have in front of people. Its hard to see reality with a complex of rejection and shame. It doesnt have to be self centeredness, that is to be judged by others, but actually self hatred that needs to be loved. Be kind. Love will prevail.
Wow. That’s nice. Thank you!
When my girlfriend get out for work, I feel a familiar feeling of waiting for someone to come, and it got me to a time when my parents got separated and I was 3 in my mother apartment and I was told my father was about to visit me and he was late, and when he arrived I told him “I thought you have abandoned me” and now I get how innocent we are, we are believing thoughts since so young, and It was a memory that I had visited already but like she said, its not done until it’s done! ❤ I look foward to feel like this again, and to have the opportunity to question and to unroot all that
How did he leave out the turnaround, “I abandoned her”??? He had just left for a month!! She was probably reacting to her own feelings of being abandoned before the breakup. Duh
I think this is a double turnaround
Hmm. Felt like there was a lot of miscommunication in this exchange. I found it hard to follow.
difficult conversation w/ surprisingly positive outcome
@@gc8972b it is simply staged. this is just excellent marketing to people who want to believe in the process.
*I want me to be considerate and be compassionate of the good times we had”
I had a simliar situation.
In my believe system there was always this tought, that no one love's me.
As i growed older this thought grows in me and evolve's to, i'm not loveable, i'm not worthy of love.
A few years ago my "ex girlfriend" wanted to make a daytrip.
So we drove to that beautiful mountain in the alps of bavaria (Zugspitze), beautiful lake in front of, it's like a perfect setting to get married or make children...
anyways as we walked around the lake, she starts to tell me that she has no feelings left for me.
I felt that she was more distant the time before, but still that was very suprising to me.
I was quiet and just said "ok, what do you think is the reason, therefore?" She told me i wasn't the men she once met and fell in love with, she told me i changed".
I just said "ok, well then it is the way it is".
The moment she told me that... the hole conversation i felt like everything inside me crushes into darkness, like a dark void that opens from the inside out and just swallows me like a black hole.
It felt like there is no floor beneth my feet, just a black darkness left that swallows me, my life, my love.
When i look back i was just sad and angry at the same time, surprised and overwhelmed by these words.
We kept our journey on and i played it all out on the inside, she was moving around talking to me like nothing was happend, and i tried to mirror this behavior back as good as i could. But when i look back the disappointment was written all over my face.
We are separated now for almost 4yrs, and i never asked myself this question till today.
Why did we drove all the way to that mountain and lakeside, so then she could tell me that she has no feelings for me left and we would be better of as friends.
Why in christ name should you do that ?
Picking out one of the most beautiful locations on this planet drove their for at least 2 hours just so you could tell me that you have no feelings left for me.
I really never questioned myself that till today. And when i think about it, it even becomes more surreal.
There is no logical answer to me why someone should do this.
I mean you could pick any scenerie any location to tell me that, why this one? Why you pick on of the most beautiful places on earth just to cut on off.
I really would just like to understand the motivation behind that action, not more not less.
27:59
I am sorry that you experienced that. I pray for your healing.
its weird that the audience is laughing at her comments. The guy is torn apart;he is not laughing
I understand your concern, but they aren't laughing at him. They're laughing at how believing our thoughts can mess us up, and our mutual humanity. Everyone there has had the identical experience and are reliving how they handled it, and seeing room for improvement. You'll notice by the end he is lighter and looking relieved. And many in the audience are looking mind-blown and grateful. I've had the good fortune to attend one of these events and the laughter only builds as the trust deepens.
Katie is stretching and stretching the issue, getting into too details, making the originality of the work dıssapear... Sorry, but feels fake
Interesting, When I hear people laugh who are watching the work, I hear it as people laughing because they see themselves in the thoughts. The thoughts the we have that cause suffering are often universal. In this context, everyone’s thoughts are being met with inquiry, either through observing or through their own inquiry. Maybe because when I’m watching I’m in that process. Not sure what’s true for others.
oh shut up [;s
Sometimes the problem is that people take their problems too seriously to the point of attachment.
😆 🤣 he is a brave Male now. 💛👍🏼 we can all use these reminders from time to time. #Guerrero #GuerrerosOnly ❤️
Thank you for being so open and brave, you helped me 💗🌅💗
Wow. Sitting here wishing someone was considerate of me 👀🤦🏼♀️🎯🤯
Katie would say.. give yourself what you want from someone else .
Thanks. You are very special❤
*Thank you for such great video. Hope to see more from you. Much appreciated! 💪*
1st lisening..love ❤ the therapy, Will be back..jg foglia, Hackettstown, nj usa
This guy is adorable. I'll bet girls come out of the woodwork to meet him!
So girls are in the woodwork? No wonder I'm still single.
@@ZomBMarketing😂
"No one would harm another human being if they weren't confused."
Wow.
Wow she is amazing now I have another tool to work with.
this is so great.
He is sweet. ❤
This is beautiful
This was beautiful.
He was hurting .. i hope he heals fast
Abandonment is imagined. 💓
I have one question?what if they do come back..what to do then?
I wanted them to explore "I abandoned me".
The first sentence needs a worksheet.
"This is upsetting so beyond belief "
Is that true?
Who would I be without that thought?
The turnaround could be what?
I learned from Tarra Brach the most important lesson of my life, if I'm suffering, then I'm believing something that's not true.
Omg!... tytytyty...❤
Comparison is the thief of joy.
is it true that the audience chuckles like flying monkeys for the lady displaying narcissistic tendencies? it's nice that she is trying to help but the way she is treating him... ouch. maybe she should just start turning a crank on a music box while he dances around for everyone to laugh at him.. she's right, he was very brave to do this and hopefully he will find ways to do the work towards healing and growth. rather than invalidate his experience and his feelings.. Yes it is true, he felt abandoned because she left him. as he mentioned, he left first for a month. then she left for 2 weeks and decided to break the news to him that she did not feel good about connecting with him anymore. of course he is having trouble with that.. because the trauma brings up the unresolved past traumas. any supposed therapist that has never gone to therapy themselves... how well can they really be of service? that being said, as I don't appreciate the narcissistic abuse.. I do appreciate what she is offering here and it is helpful.
🙏🏻
Whew!
🙏🏻❤️✨
❤
I want to know what Byron said to the man with the gun!!
Yes. She's told this story before over the years. I have wondered why/how it came about, too!
She said and I quote fro.the school, 'I hope you don't do that to YOU'
Because when we hurt others, we hurt ourselves)
@BABYLOVEHUNNI Thank you for that answer to my question! That DOES sound like what Byron's response would be!🥲
I wonder ... is it true?
He put down the gun.
Is it true about the gun Byron? I don’t think so
Katie compared that girl to a confused man who was crazy enough try kill katie one night , i m relieved to see that she sees his pain depth of it ,yet as shes is enlightened being the wordly sorrows big or small are equally meaningless when u r enlightened i guess.
This is upsetting so beyond belief. Katie’s work is useful to help reframe beliefs….BUT I notice Katie can be very impatient with people on stage… and it seems much of the formula of work with a thought is ‘invalidate my feelings, and disbelieve my thoughts and the story I’m telling myself because it isn’t the best strategy to help me feel my best right now’ and that seems like serious bypassing and invalidation. I like where she goes with the question ‘does she consider me’ and I see she wants people to get out of the trauma of being stuck in a moment, but I really think this whole method could use some refinement. Honestly. There’s some gold nuggets here BUT the way it’s worded and done right now feels like there are very invalidating steps to this.. and there will be some internal parts completely left out and neglected.
i agree with you. She also switches between absolute statements to relative ones when it suits her. For example, she asks the question 'How many of you have been abandoned?' and when many raise their hands she thinks she has made her point. But then if someone came on stage to work on the thought 'He abandoned me' she would then deconstruct the idea that a person can be abandoned! So damned if you do, damned if you don't! I also find her way of ridiculing people's beliefs in front of others very shaming, considering that she often stresses that it is the truth alone that will set you free. If truth is sufficient, why is it necessary to shame people? It makes for good showmanship, but is damaging and manipulative.
I’d done the work for years. Worked with and observed Katie for a long time, I never once see her as impatient. It’s possible that’s your thinking around her behavior, which she’s asking us to question. What would your experience be if you weren’t caught in your interpretation of what is.
She is honest, she is not fake nice, that bothers you. At some point we have problems with our teachers it is so common, the ego loves it because now you are right and your teacher is wrong, this is basically your interpretation of this talk. I would consider it she is impatient with people on stage is that true?
The more you do the work, the more you can listen and hear your thoughts and see larger truths, and the inquiry spreads to all the parts and they don't feel as left out or invalidated. She can only focus on so many beliefs at once with one individual in a limited time frame. I don't see impatience here, and I understand that you do.
So interesting, I experience Katie so much differently than impatient. Our thoughts really do create our reality.
Is it true that he held a gun to your stomach Byron? I don’t think so
his ex sounds like a borderline
after all, it's always them
I feel like this guy has crickets in his head.
Katie is getting more vague and unfocused, yet preachy..with age. She used to go directly into the Work. Now, she continuously stops & reframes her comments to the man. It's discombobulating...and not as effective IMO.
What is this, a comedy show?? She keeps saying things in such a way as if she’s looking for laughs from the audience, and she gets them! Why is the audience laughing so much!? This all feels a little sad and disturbing
LACK OF SELF LOVE & SELF KNOWLEDGE .... !!!!!