Dating a PSYCHO Girlfriend in Bitlife

Поділитися
Вставка
  • Опубліковано 28 гру 2024
  • Ігри

КОМЕНТАРІ • 952

  • @BijuuMike
    @BijuuMike  5 років тому +448

    HEy my bit BOIS and gals I forgot to put this link in the description woops www.levelwinner.com/bitlife-1-27-update-guide-everything-you-need-to-know-about-bitlife-version-1-27-aka-the-mystery-update/ This is the link to the article that explains the bitlife update changes

  • @harlyn9521
    @harlyn9521 5 років тому +571

    *reads title *
    I guess you dated David's mother...

    • @cjs3126
      @cjs3126 5 років тому +9

      Lol

    • @yourlocalvampirekat
      @yourlocalvampirekat 5 років тому +25

      FBI: STAY WHERE YOU ARE!! YOU HEARD THE TRUTH!! *arrests us three*
      WORTH BIT!
      Judge: Alright penalty charges are .... Many

    • @ekarlyy
      @ekarlyy 5 років тому +10

      Yeah I bet David’s mom is that crazy girl in the thumbnail

    • @Yolo-nk7zb
      @Yolo-nk7zb 5 років тому +6

      Wait... is Mike Davids dad-
      No, it can’t be...

    • @harlyn9521
      @harlyn9521 5 років тому +1

      @@Yolo-nk7zb lol

  • @dragonkfg
    @dragonkfg 5 років тому +494

    I ain't afraid of no man, but that thumbnail scares me.

    • @deepfriedbaby3587
      @deepfriedbaby3587 5 років тому

      are you saying women aren't people smh

    • @dragonkfg
      @dragonkfg 5 років тому +4

      @@deepfriedbaby3587
      Tf2 meme

    • @Todwaggnerirl
      @Todwaggnerirl 5 років тому +7

      Dragongaming-Kid friendly gaming GG 👏👏👏 TF2 memes beat everything. Anything else,...
      NEIN!

    • @AwkFoxx69
      @AwkFoxx69 5 років тому +4

      @@deepfriedbaby3587 r/whoosh

    • @deepfriedbaby3587
      @deepfriedbaby3587 5 років тому +3

      @@AwkFoxx69
      very funny reddit user lol!

  • @rldazai
    @rldazai 5 років тому +898

    "dating a psycho girlfriend in bitlife"
    *did you mean: a yandere*

  • @abigailcats7109
    @abigailcats7109 5 років тому +92

    I think the picture book makes you smarter.

  • @jade9938
    @jade9938 5 років тому +138

    In bitlife when someone is crazy:
    *More likely to do a threesome
    *Attack when you want to break up
    *Cheat
    *Stalk you

    • @dumbassshitposting6523
      @dumbassshitposting6523 5 років тому +4

      One two threesome I’m gonna cheat on some, and then gonna break up and talk, and then stalk.

    • @dollykumo2959
      @dollykumo2959 5 років тому +2

      @@dumbassshitposting6523 that was nice but a bit of non Sense is present 😂😂

    • @obi-wankenobi916
      @obi-wankenobi916 5 років тому +1

      69 likes

    • @anamariaapostol
      @anamariaapostol 5 років тому

      Also, if you are bisexual you can get a threesome but only when you are gf/bf not married

    • @bms3603
      @bms3603 5 років тому

      Also your parents are more likely to disapprove your partner

  • @its_jay5677
    @its_jay5677 5 років тому +470

    Me: sees thumbnail
    Mind: just monika
    Me: .-.

  • @zoemoore9401
    @zoemoore9401 5 років тому +106

    “Go hook somewhere else!”
    LOL I LAUGHED SO HARD!!!!

  • @doncolga08
    @doncolga08 5 років тому +78

    “I’ve Encountered A Donkey” -Bijuu Mike 2019

  • @waylontggwaylonthegoodgamer
    @waylontggwaylonthegoodgamer 5 років тому +44

    *I can now just picture an actual baby in their crib, taking a book and says "DR Seuss what up?"*

  • @tahirilandolfa8906
    @tahirilandolfa8906 5 років тому +99

    Did you notice that when he continued on as his child, Cruella’s last name was Stalkerson.... she married stalky stalkerson!!!!!!!

  • @isabellaraygoza666
    @isabellaraygoza666 5 років тому +49

    Me: *playing guitar then gets a notification that Bijuu uploaded*
    Also me: *yeets guitar into closet*

  • @ke8753
    @ke8753 5 років тому +64

    "i mean five-year-olds are talking probably!"
    michael. most five-year-olds can read.

    • @hihi15yearsago56
      @hihi15yearsago56 5 років тому +5

      I was born with a disability i learned to talk at 5 im still learning how to read and write in 3rd grade and 9

    • @ke8753
      @ke8753 5 років тому +2

      @@hihi15yearsago56 glad you're doing well! keep at it ☺️

    • @thereza3
      @thereza3 5 років тому +1

      @@hihi15yearsago56 I hope you're doing well.

    • @shrub5770
      @shrub5770 3 роки тому

      @@hihi15yearsago56 It's been a year, so I hope you're doing well! Stay determined

  • @whpstckagostp
    @whpstckagostp 5 років тому +156

    Bijuu: Dating a PSYCHO Girlfriend in Bitlife

    me: He Dated Kidsbop Karen

    • @Ary_Official1
      @Ary_Official1 5 років тому

      LOL OMG I'M DYING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Hahahahahahaha You are so right!!!!!

    • @felix-fw3lq
      @felix-fw3lq 5 років тому +2

      Aryanna Chlumsky
      Rest in peace

  • @rachelsteinfield9326
    @rachelsteinfield9326 5 років тому +89

    *"Dating a PSYCHO Girlfriend"*
    It may be better not having a girl.. or less better..

    • @thereza3
      @thereza3 5 років тому

      Much more better.

  • @cyberia4425
    @cyberia4425 5 років тому +81

    "We should cut off the cords of people's airpods"
    -Bijuu Mike

  • @demvnic_vwn6761
    @demvnic_vwn6761 5 років тому +32

    BitLife: new things! :D
    Bijuu: oh cool!
    BitLife: + mysteries >:D

  • @alyssaselinger5553
    @alyssaselinger5553 5 років тому +66

    “Cut the cords off people’s AirPods” that’s not how it works....

    • @dropmelon
      @dropmelon 5 років тому +5

      Alyssa Selinger Maybe people that put cords on their AirPod deserves that for the blasphemy :p.

  • @angeIgf
    @angeIgf 5 років тому +5

    with the toying around option you get when you're a baby, picking the picture book boosts your smarts

  • @cassiebrioche
    @cassiebrioche 5 років тому +9

    Mike: "...to stock up on salvia."
    What I read: "...to stock up on saliva."

  • @holyhot-chocolate
    @holyhot-chocolate 5 років тому +21

    0.1 seconds in and I’m loving bit boys

  • @queenykake5274
    @queenykake5274 5 років тому +17

    I chose to do take the L so he can feel even worse

  • @Tobiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii
    @Tobiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii 5 років тому +29

    Mike: "the baby gets sick more if you don't vaccinate them"
    Me: why.... bro... that's the reason we vaccinate.....

    • @whatthefvksk
      @whatthefvksk 5 років тому

      Gacha Moon wolfie that’s not even true. That’s what I was always told

    • @hehewenisunfunny
      @hehewenisunfunny 5 років тому +1

      Rising Shadows
      So are u anti-vax or pro-vax?

    • @whatthefvksk
      @whatthefvksk 5 років тому

      Wot it’s Elissa idk I was just always told that vaccinations don’t help

    • @hehewenisunfunny
      @hehewenisunfunny 5 років тому +1

      Rising Shadows
      Well u didn’t get the flu even tho all ma friends had it but that my be cuz I don’t have friends...

    • @whatthefvksk
      @whatthefvksk 5 років тому

      Wot it’s Elissa No I didnt

  • @HalfAnd_Half
    @HalfAnd_Half 5 років тому +13

    When you said Chauncey I thought of your editor Goncy

    • @HalfAnd_Half
      @HalfAnd_Half 5 років тому

      :0
      I got hearted! Thank you, Mike!

  • @callmeshifty6263
    @callmeshifty6263 5 років тому +18

    “bitBOIs”
    Me: **cough**

  • @snooprae1
    @snooprae1 5 років тому +98

    Nobody:
    When you're early but dont know what to say
    Me: :/ Hai :>

    • @cjs3126
      @cjs3126 5 років тому +2

      Relatable

    • @MelTheHal
      @MelTheHal 5 років тому +7

      Lazy comment

  • @Pebbllz
    @Pebbllz 5 років тому +86

    When there’s two views and 48 likes and it says there’s five comments but you don’t see any comments

    • @discodanny4141
      @discodanny4141 5 років тому +2

      LOL MEE

    • @starxcanada
      @starxcanada 5 років тому +2

      Once again i find a way to say "Im early"

    • @bjp1101
      @bjp1101 5 років тому +2

      Yuuuppppp

    • @libee1881
      @libee1881 5 років тому +2

      This has 69 likes save my soul plz

    • @angierat6487
      @angierat6487 5 років тому +2

      UA-cam be on drugs

  • @idrawanime0119
    @idrawanime0119 5 років тому +18

    Me: *literally staring at the comment section for the whole entire video trying to figure out what to say to get scrub of the day* :')

    • @cod_bo2_fan476
      @cod_bo2_fan476 5 років тому +2

      I never got scrub of the day, so I don't know if it works, but try to say something funny about the video without thinking

    • @idrawanime0119
      @idrawanime0119 5 років тому +1

      @@cod_bo2_fan476 too bad I'm not funny 🤠

  • @anliecabonilas8680
    @anliecabonilas8680 5 років тому +7

    Do just hate it when Bijuu mike never notice you

  • @Urmomisdele
    @Urmomisdele 5 років тому +11

    “dating a psycho girlfriend”
    me: wait you aren’t dating me

  • @helengrugett
    @helengrugett 5 років тому +4

    Did he really just say
    "Lets go cut the *cords* off of people's Airpods"

  • @marroche2111
    @marroche2111 5 років тому +7

    ex-gf: hey can you move the plant in your bedroom I can't see you.
    me: okay sure!
    me 2 seconds later: wait what?

  • @oreolover4516
    @oreolover4516 5 років тому +3

    4:02 Wait, cut the cords off of airpods?
    . . . cords?

  • @chasecaudill8762
    @chasecaudill8762 5 років тому +2

    Mike to get the girlfriends to not break up with you, you have to make the relationship a little closer by spending time, conversing with her, etc. They’ll stay longer if you do that

  • @arg6686
    @arg6686 4 роки тому +3

    “let’s Go cut the cords off of people Ari pods”
    Mmm yes logically yes

  • @ramonathedragon6378
    @ramonathedragon6378 5 років тому +3

    Ana: **would rather read**
    *Taro Yamada has entered the chat*

  • @i_am_samich_man9640
    @i_am_samich_man9640 5 років тому +4

    Bijuu mike "lets go cut the cords of peoples air pods"
    Me: "How you gonna do that?"

  • @madalynn7203
    @madalynn7203 5 років тому +36

    When your so early and haven't watched the video......
    Me: AMAZING VIDEO!!!

    • @cjs3126
      @cjs3126 5 років тому +2

      Lol

    • @dakurifanart8386
      @dakurifanart8386 5 років тому

      That’s what happened I was writing a comment and I ran out of charger the video was posted 24 seconds ago and when I watched it it was 4 minuets ago

    • @rencandy2665
      @rencandy2665 5 років тому

      This is me

  • @firewolf595
    @firewolf595 5 років тому +11

    Psycho girlfriend? I believe you mean Yuri

    • @Ee-cp4zn
      @Ee-cp4zn 5 років тому +1

      No monika

    • @firewolf595
      @firewolf595 5 років тому +1

      Yuri stand herself if you reject her or accept her. Than has glitched Text for the whole weekend. And this also goes to show that Natsuki is best girl

  • @alyx5537
    @alyx5537 5 років тому

    4:00
    bijuu> you know what we should do to be a bad kid?
    we should go *cut the cords off of people's airpods, man*
    me> hm.. airpods dont have cords?

  • @Experiment121Archive
    @Experiment121Archive 5 років тому +3

    I always get normal parents in Bitlife, so that proves that in Bitlife, Ur cursed XD

  • @KoyjaEdits
    @KoyjaEdits 5 років тому

    0:00 I don’t know why I find this so funny... I literally tapped it over and over again making it sound like he’s singing a song about bit boys

  • @confidelover8266
    @confidelover8266 5 років тому +3

    One of my wives stole about 100k dollars of mine from my safe...and she told me I shouldn’t of kept it in the open on BitLife

  • @RenaufDeutsch
    @RenaufDeutsch 5 років тому +1

    I love that the last straw was taking all of her friends to a Pitbull concert and not, ya know, the dr*gs.

  • @alexg7057
    @alexg7057 5 років тому +2

    14:39 was that an all purple woman?! I have never seen that before

  • @jensennairn3786
    @jensennairn3786 5 років тому +2

    Dude, I was playing bitlife yesterday and My brain and spine were blown up and I survived. HOW!!!???

  • @kpopstansbnm9240
    @kpopstansbnm9240 5 років тому +48

    “Dating a psycho girlfriend in bitlife”

    • @nikonijn
      @nikonijn 5 років тому +2

      MarieGacha 4 yes thats the video title

  • @phrogwithhat9909
    @phrogwithhat9909 5 років тому +1

    Bijuu Mike: " Cut the cords off peoples _Air Pods_ " 4:00
    Me: " They don't have cords -_- "

  • @averymalfoy8933
    @averymalfoy8933 5 років тому +4

    Me: **watching bitlife**
    UA-cam:**bitlife add**
    Me: TF MAN IM WATCHIN' SOME BIJUU MIKE BITLIFE NOT THIS!

  • @doglover7958
    @doglover7958 5 років тому +1

    “You know what we should do to be a bad kid, cut the cord off of people’s AirPods,”
    Hod does that work??? 4:01

  • @EighmyLupin
    @EighmyLupin 5 років тому +4

    When it comes to Breasting Feeding the first 6 months are the most important, but most doctors suggest nursing until 2 years. Any more than 2 years is a big no no though. There's no more health benefits, it can cause issues with their teeth (both the act of "sucking" and the sugar in milk) and there is a higher chance that the kid will actually remember breastfeeding which can mess with them psychologically. Also, cut the dang apron strings mom.

  • @gianesisgonzalez1847
    @gianesisgonzalez1847 5 років тому +2

    4:03 air pods have cords?!?!?

  • @SirSplash-j9d
    @SirSplash-j9d 5 років тому +6

    I love just fighting everyone in BitLife

    • @blake3937
      @blake3937 5 років тому +1

      I love murdering people in Bitboylife.

    • @blake3937
      @blake3937 5 років тому +1

      Man I'm weird

    • @SirSplash-j9d
      @SirSplash-j9d 5 років тому

      Blake Nicholas that’s amazing! Truly amazing

  • @PogoGalaxy
    @PogoGalaxy 2 роки тому

    13:33 that feature would have been perfect for the Lily's Garden challenge, because you can disrespect your mother's ashes

  • @sssnipercat2582
    @sssnipercat2582 5 років тому +8

    My gf does this challenge in real life dealing with me. . .

  • @svinjamaria
    @svinjamaria 5 років тому +1

    :40 that right there on the top? That’s a blessed ad.

  • @arikablackburn7284
    @arikablackburn7284 5 років тому +3

    Hey Bijuu Mike can you leave your discord link in the descriptions.
    Edit i spelled descriptions wrong

  • @Fluffy_Blueberry
    @Fluffy_Blueberry 5 років тому +2

    Bijuu- Cut the cords off someone’s "AirPods"
    Me- wait what?
    4:02

  • @wigglynoodlez
    @wigglynoodlez 5 років тому +5

    HI BIJUU MIKE

  • @n3komimi.
    @n3komimi. 5 років тому +1

    3:49 - 4:04
    Bijuu Mike: "You know what we should do to be a bad student. Man, we should cut the cords off people's airpods."
    Me: Wait a minute, airpods don't have cords O-o... you know what never mind 😂.

  • @mari_e
    @mari_e 5 років тому +30

    I'm early.....
    Like realllllllllllllyyyyyyyyyyyyy early.

    • @elliedoesntwanttobehere
      @elliedoesntwanttobehere 4 роки тому +3

      I'm late.....
      Like realllllllllllyyyyyyyyyyyyy late.

    • @Pringlyman
      @Pringlyman 4 роки тому

      @@elliedoesntwanttobehere im later
      Likeeee reallllllllllllllllllllllllllyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy late

  • @ireallylovetogeinumaki
    @ireallylovetogeinumaki 5 років тому +1

    Bijuu mike:Lauren pin-
    Davids mum:DONT SAY THE REST OF THAT WORD

  • @futabasakura6881
    @futabasakura6881 5 років тому +14

    Random bitlife girl on UA-cam: dating a boring guy on bitlife!

  • @___.darkxwolf17.___193
    @___.darkxwolf17.___193 4 роки тому +1

    Bijuu:MONEY DOESNT GROW ON TREES
    Me:what is paper made out of?
    Bijuu:Trees
    Me:what is money made out of?
    Bijuu:paper-

  • @MiyahElise
    @MiyahElise 5 років тому +3

    My uncles name is Chauncey 😂😂

  • @mffstarboys
    @mffstarboys 5 років тому +1

    The add that came up when Bijuu was checking the update
    Jojo’s Dream World Tour

  • @makylayt1683
    @makylayt1683 5 років тому +1

    Omg the way he said Soweto ( 2:16 ) is hilarious
    I'm from South Africa

  • @heyoimcyan2687
    @heyoimcyan2687 5 років тому +2

    12:06
    *you sure it’s not talking about Florida?*
    welp-

  • @mizumichan7859
    @mizumichan7859 5 років тому +2

    12:37 He screenshots :P

  • @nicolastallqvist8080
    @nicolastallqvist8080 5 років тому +2

    And the best name award goes to Cruella Stalkerson.

  • @ayalaholy
    @ayalaholy 5 років тому +2

    who else wants mike to post more each day

  • @kimberlygiles4387
    @kimberlygiles4387 5 років тому +2

    “We should go cut the cords off of people’s AirPods”
    Me:since when do AirPods have strings..?

  • @rhi3882
    @rhi3882 4 роки тому +1

    Dating a psycho girlfriend
    Me- you must be dating half the female population

  • @retro_mia3368
    @retro_mia3368 5 років тому +2

    "Cut the cords off of peoples airpods"
    Me: hol' up
    Me: slows it down
    "Cuuuttt thhhhheeee cooorddds oofff peopppleeees aiiirppooodsss"
    *Airpods don't have cords*

  • @Matt_Rice
    @Matt_Rice 5 років тому +2

    Mike: we should go cut off the wires of people’s air pods
    Me: BRUH, AIR PODS ARE WIRELESS 😂

  • @thelazygamingpanda3973
    @thelazygamingpanda3973 Рік тому

    Just imagine.
    “What’s your name”
    “Cruella”
    “Yeah I can’t go out with you”
    “Why”
    “Your name”
    “What’s wrong with my name”
    “Cruella is a evil name”
    “What do you mean”
    *walks away singing the Cruella De Vil theme song*

  • @roserobedee504
    @roserobedee504 5 років тому

    I call this challenge the good life
    1. Be very smart and good looks
    2.be nice to everyone
    3.have a girlfriend
    4.Get married at at least 25
    5.study on high school and elementary
    6.live till at least 69
    7.do not go to jail or else you lose
    8. Find the love of your life
    9.be good and live

  • @bella-uw7lx
    @bella-uw7lx 5 років тому +1

    When you see your fav UA-camr play Bitlife and the character they generate is a character with your birthday... Well I’m so happy ;-; My bday is August 15th oml 1:21

  • @bluest-fey6707
    @bluest-fey6707 4 роки тому

    2:15
    Bijuu Mike:* pronounces Soweto wrong *
    Me who lives in South Africa: * subconsciously corrects him *

  • @rivervaughanmusicstuff
    @rivervaughanmusicstuff 5 років тому +1

    12:11 Yes, it does seem like something I, a Florida man, would have happen to me. And yes we have alligators in Florida. UF's sports teams are the Florida Gators for a reason. (;

  • @janellerieck
    @janellerieck 4 роки тому

    4:02 did he just say cut the cords off of AIRPORDS? Yeah AIRPODS. Think about it.

  • @violetamber0956
    @violetamber0956 5 років тому +1

    Did Mike just say "I will cut the cords off of people's AIRPODS"?

  • @churpyfurball5280
    @churpyfurball5280 5 років тому +2

    Of course it's a Lauren
    All Laurens are insane
    Queen Lauren
    Bread Queen
    Dear Queen YASSSSSS
    "hOw Do YoU dO fElLoW kIdS"

  • @IJustWantToBeAKnight
    @IJustWantToBeAKnight 5 років тому

    2:21
    Dude...I think that was me.
    I found that Dino part as an archeologist and claimed all credit.
    Cause I did find it.

  • @cola2879
    @cola2879 5 років тому +1

    I figured out the saved lives... **ahem**
    1) Start a new life
    2) Get as far into that life as you wish
    3) Click on the 3 lines in a crircle on the top left corner
    4) Start a new life
    5) Repeat step 3
    6) Click on the 'Saved Lives' button to acess your previous and current life :)

  • @sxmplylila628
    @sxmplylila628 4 роки тому +1

    "Go cut the cords off of ppls airpods."
    - Bijuu Mike 2019

  • @momo_da_hooman2920
    @momo_da_hooman2920 5 років тому +2

    Mike...I just wanted to say that you are an amazing youtuber and that when I watch your videos I find myself ALWAYS smiling and that makes me as happy as when I watch your videos.

  • @chikayoulls4059
    @chikayoulls4059 5 років тому +1

    Wait a second, did Bijuu really just say “cut the cords off of people’s AirPods”

  • @Fractal821
    @Fractal821 5 років тому +2

    Nobody:
    Bijuu Mike: _Thinks a lunar eclipse can make you go blind_

  • @squarecircle_8886
    @squarecircle_8886 5 років тому +2

    Mike: look at- look at me!
    Me: ....all i see is a scrub god

  • @foofy.friend
    @foofy.friend 5 років тому +1

    Your last name was Watson. You had a baby boy. And you didn't name it John.
    iM DiSaPPoiNtEd BiJuu

  • @rykerirontooth
    @rykerirontooth 5 років тому +1

    *”Extremely mistreated”*
    *DEPRESSION*

  • @squibs5583
    @squibs5583 5 років тому +1

    Im tellin you, Google can hear you at all times and it has gave every single ad as a bit life ad

  • @lemonhoney172
    @lemonhoney172 5 років тому +2

    me: **sees thumbnail**
    also me: was it Monika, Yuri or Yuno?

  • @xmp22_
    @xmp22_ 5 років тому +2

    Before the update I had a really crazy gf in the game who killed me with an ar because I insulted her lmaooo

  • @sketchyzo3110
    @sketchyzo3110 5 років тому +1

    "Green eggs and ham."
    Yes, please.

  • @RonRonStubbings
    @RonRonStubbings 4 роки тому

    mike "you think money grows on trees?"
    me "well money is made out of paper and paper comes from trees, so yes, yes i do think money grows on trees"

  • @Cy_Cynen
    @Cy_Cynen 5 років тому +1

    Watching this is helping me to stop crying over juice wrld keep being awesome Bijju Mike

  • @alexb859
    @alexb859 5 років тому +1

    Awesome video!!! Also I got Fire Emblem heros on my iPad :)

  • @medinasehicc
    @medinasehicc 5 років тому +1

    CONGRATS BIJUU! No really congratulations! ☺️🇧🇦