Hollywood's Biggest Liar | Steven Seagal
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- Опубліковано 8 кві 2023
- Steven Seagal's legacy has been tarnished by an absolutely staggering amount of controversies. Let's explore the truth behind Seagal's lies and examine the impact they've had on his reputation in Hollywood and beyond. Most importantly, that time he pooped his pants.
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Chuck Norris or do an 80s theme with nostalgic sitcoms.
Parks and rec overall ranking like The Office and It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
Frank Dux would be funny. He inspired the movie Bloodsport and is way more full of crap than Segal.
You should talk about how Frank Dux and Steven Seagal would be the greatest martial arts battle on planet earf. I don’t know if Dux’s trophies could withstand the weight of Stevens buffet plate.
Irving Soto he's another Frank dux type.
Steven Seagal knows karate, judo, boxing and some other words.
This joke is too old... but still funny every time XD
Cheers!
Don't forget the line, "Anyone Seen Richie?"
Can I laugh in your face?
-steven segal.
this joke is on every seagal video.
@@SuperKratosgamer good
I first ran into Seagull in Saigon in '67, we were part of a CIA black ops team but I was amazed when a North Korean battalion hoved into view. We were all panicking but Steven took control and single handedly destroyed the entire battalion with nothing more than a dessert spoon, what a guy!! Of course being so humble Steven would never make this public, as I said, what a guy! Also, his farts smell like unicorns.
😄😄
I don’t believe you
@@Steven-js5kj
Then my body double will slap fight you to death until you admit I'm the greatest everything that has ever lived. Then I'm off to a strip club.
I met Steven Seagull in 1970 in Japan, during his Aikido class where he was teaching kung-foo to Bruce Lee. The yakuza had just put a hit out on Bruce, and so Steven assembled a crack team of his best martial arts students, and then personally led the assault on the yakuza headquarters. I watched him single-handedly take out all 69 sumo wrestler security guards that patrolled the corridors. Then Steve entered the yakuza's main dojo room, and personally decapitated all 17 judo warriors inside with his bare hands. Then, while me and Bruce Lee waited outside, Steven expertly assassinated all 101 ninjas in the yakuza building's main Ninjatorium. I'd never seen such bravery or such awesome martial arts prowess before, all in one amazing man! And then, when we finally got to the penthouse offices of the yakuza's Mr. Big, Steven just told us "hang back, I got this," and then he shot him in the face with a vacuum cleaner.
@@atomicdancer
What a guy!
No, he honestly _did_ open a dojo in Japan. His mother-in-law gave him the key to the door of her dojo one evening and told him to open it in the morning.
I needed this laugh.
🤫🤭😂🤣
Lmao good one!!
Oh snap
Yes, that is exactly how that went down! Lmao!
His role as an Aikido master in Japan was to open the doors to the dojo every morning!😅
I consume anti-Steven Seagal content like Steven consumes cheeseburgers
Oh no!😂😂
He was a man of extra un ordinary magnitude.
😂😂
Steven Seagal is a great guy, just ask him, he'll tell you!
Thank you Mr Warmth, we do miss you
😂😂😂😂
"Steven Seagal is such a cool guy" - Steven Seagal
💩🤢🤮🥺👎
My friend was in one of Seagal's movies. I'll just call him John Dough. Steven came to his trailer and said "John....do you love your father?" Yes, John replied. "John.....I.....am your father". Apparently Seagal was trying to "coach him" in his acting and thought this would be a "cool way" to get John's attention. He told me "it was one of the weirdest human interactions of my life"
My god 😅
Lmao
Steven Seagal is the best person he knows 😂😂😂
Master Seagal is not a person he is a demi god 😂😂😂
😂🙏
A legend, in his own mind.
Best comment!
WTF
You can say that he's a horrible person, but what you can't say is that he's a good actor.
He's not acting..... he's pretending 😂
Brilliant 😂
@@roylle6346 hell he ain't good at that either lol
@@joelshalom7100 that's how I knw
He's actually lead a fairly interesting life, but I guess that's not good enough for him. He wants people to think he's the most interesting person in the history of the world. LOL.
A true Narcissist
The best Segal story I ever heard was when he came out of his trailer and walked up to another actor and said quote "I just read the best movie script I've ever seen in my life." The actor then asked him who wrote it and he said "I did!" Lol idk how the actor sat there without laughing in his face cuz I would've lost it. I was in tears laughing when I heard the story.
Another story I’ve heard was about the time when Mr Seagal was bragging about how he would beat Jean-Claude Van Damme in a fight at a party they were both at.When Van Damme heard about it,he challenged Seagal who decided to ‘disappear’ for the rest of the party.
Rob Schneider told that story. It's hilarious
@Dostoyevsky 731 it was his ex bro in law
That actor was Keenan Ivory Wayans on the set of "The Glimmer Man". Rob Schneider is lying about how he was the one who told that story since he was never in any movie starring Seagal.
@@robroy6374 actually Schneider said he heard the story from Keenan
I met Steven 60 years ago, we were part of an FBI/CIA/USPS/UPS/FEDEX secret operative team. We fought off Mafia/Cartel/Yakuza members in Africa with just sticks and rocks. It was only us 2 vs thousands. Sadly I didnt survive but Steven lived on and hopefully he will tell this story
😂😂😂😂😂
I fought with seagull on the beaches during the bowling green massacre back in 82. It was a difficult time, the enemy just kept throwing men at us but with one mighty roundhouse after another, waves dropped. I was cornered by a man with a knife and Steven waved his hands with emphasis causing the guy to drop the knife and fill his pants right there on the spot. I wasn't able to tell anyone as I had to wait a few years to be born. I owe him my life
@@antionitoniobianchinitio8663 I'll take it 😅
LOL Was the enemy kind enough to come at you one at a time like they do in Seagal's movies?
😂😂
@@crashburn3292 oh absolutely. I screamed "fight like a man" at them and then they knew they had to line up single file and wait for their name to be called... It's a must for attendance purposes. Once this process began, we systematically disappointed them with our moves and witty powers ranger one liners until they gave up
It would have been rude not to.
He doesn't hold or shoot a gun like he's ever been trained 😂
Nope
He should've taken notes from Arnold Schwarzenegger's Terminator 1 & 2.
You should see how he handles the toilet paper...off camera!
And you are qualified to evaluate this. Seagal has accomplished more than you could ever wish to and dream to. Crypto anti-Semites are the worst and the most unintelligent of chuds.
Or run!
Steven: iv just read the best script ever!
Rob: oh who wrote it?
Steven: I did.
😂😂😂
It was Keenan, Rob just repeated the story for the camera.
I am a retired British Police Constable who 28 years front line service of 30 years before having to retire.
Before that I was a Royal Marine Commando who did 3 tours in Belfast during the height of the troubles
Initially I enjoyed Steven Segal films. However when he went to do "live" Cop shows I couldn't help feel that it was all cheroraphed. He was always with the Chiefs, never the Cops yet he often was at the scene first where he then began issuing orders to seasoned Cops. Something that no full time Cop would get away with in my day.
Differant country differant time every thing ain't the same and what would be the point of having ranks then if u could t even tell seasoned cops what to do there has to be a chain of command makes no sense
@@robertschoelerman7496 😂 Sorry, are you defending Steven here?
@@akala1001 No
Ah, but those are rules for mere mortals and as such don't apply to Seagal. Ask him, he'll probably tell you. 😂
@@howardpowell3068...yeah I could tell you didn't approve of Segle ordering actual LE around when it's obvious he has no repoire with them and hence no experience and hence no ACTUAL authority... I get the impression the sheriffs (who are elected county officials in the US,, therefore some use unusual ways to get more popular) just wanted their county and themselves to get some publicity... Then with the allegations,, I'm not sure if the authorities actually interviewed the two young Russian girls who Segle basically kept as defacto hostages,, seeing as how they were from Russia and didn't know anybody in the United States and didn't even speak English... But I'm sure when Jefferson parish found someone who could speak Russian they didn't have anything bad to say against him, I'm sure they said he tipped well LOL and being basically prostitutes and adults they didn't have anything to say about any sexual activity... But yeah the local prosecutors or judges or whoever probably didn't like weirdos no matter how much money they have and the cops just sorta disowned him quietly and Segle ran to Russia faster than Edward Snowden...
Another great story involving Sensei Seagull, is the one that the producer of SNL told.
So, Seagull was the host for an episode of SNL in the late 90's and apparently he's considered the worst host in the history of the show, because of his behavior and the fact that he flat out refused to participate in many skits.
Some time later, Nic Cage was doing the host thing and he was really unhappy with his performance.
He was whining around, how bad he was and that people are going to remember him as the worst celebrity host of SNL and what not.
The producer got fed up at some point and told Cage: ''Oh will you quit whining around, you were not that bad. Do you wanna see how bad looks like? Check out the episode with Steven Seagal."
Couple of days later, Nic Cage calls up the producer and tells him: "I actually watched that Seagal episode you mentioned and oh my God, you were not lying. Holy shit was that bad, compared to him, my performance was worthy for an Emmy! I want to apologise for all my whining..."
I really hope this is true. Do you have a link?
I knew Steven back in the second world war, he was serving as a tail gunner on my submarine
LoL
that sounds gay
😂😂😂
God I just laughed til it hurt hahahaha you sir are a genius! Only second to Steven 😂
@@FizzleFX 😂👍
He lives his life "fake it until you have to fake it again"-style
his dedication and stamina concerning his craft as an actor is unparalleled. he just can't stop acting :D
He is NOT an actor. 😂
Jean Claude Vandamme is what Steven Seagal thinks he is.
Seagal has more publicity then your favorite princes all that is getting sensei seagal paid
@@saidaalvarado2168is English your first language?
When Segal tried making a comeback in action movies, investors replied he needed to lose 3 things: 1) The kimono, 2) The ponytail, and 3) 70 pounds
I was a space shuttle Door gunner with seagull in the mid 1980’s. On my first mission with him. He said “In space no one can hear you scream. I wrote that, you can quote me”. He was a total badass in space. Seagull trained himself to create his own gravity so he did not float around like the rest of the crew. When ask how he did it. He just said he studied with Albert Einstein and learned to “push through” gravity. On an other mission, we were doing some live weapons fire as shuttle door gunners do. I dropped a clip of ammo that got stuck on the edge of the wing. Seagull in another amazing show of awesomeness, held his breath and walked out on the wing to grab the clip. While he was out there, he spotted a small asteroid heading for him. He reached up and caught it before it could hit the shuttle and then he walked back inside with the clip and the softball sized asteroid. Seagull as the best shuttle door gunner I ever saw.
I can 100% confirm what THEbadlnb said. I served on the same space shuttle as a chef and Steven taught me how to make space cookies. He even said that the space cookies I made after he took me under his guidance were the best he's ever had in space (besides the ones he made himself ofc). Biggest achievement of my life so far. Long live the greatest space marine shuttle door gunner of all times
@@makoko6812 oh maaann I forgot about the Space cookies. He told me it was his dad’s recipe from when his dad was a Gemini capsule door gunner.
There are not too many of us door gunners left to tell the tales. I know I had to go through years of training, Seagull only had to walk in and sign in the dotted line. The next day he was the ranking door gunner and on his way to space. He was the only door gunner I knew who could get up during launch, when the shuttle was on it’s way to space and use the shuttle toilet. He designed the shuttle toilet also.
I remember that time the shuttle pilot and the co-pilot both got food poisoning from bad space cookies and Seagull had to take over and emergency land the shuttle on an aircraft carrier. He was flying blind because the flight crew had projectile vomited all over the instruments so he had to punch the window out and hold his breath for 20 minutes. Everyone on board was screaming and losing their shit until he started jamming with his guitar over the intercom and by the time we touched down everyone was dancing and applauding. It wasn't the first time he saved my life and wasn't the last, but everyone on that shuttle is here today because of that hero with balls of titanium.
magazine
@@j-bob_oreo no, Seagull only uses clips.
The Japanese Comedian Seggurra makes great jokes about him😂
Segurrahhhhh!
🤣👍🏻
Segura is so damn good!!
So does Mad TV's skits.
Tom Segura? He's Japanese?
@@davidjsaulhe's been Japanese for 40 years 😂
More and more Steven Seagull roasts just keep coming 😂
A legend in his own mind.😂
Your just jealous he went the the winners side, Russian, China, and and all their BRIC'S Nation's Buddies, including the Trillionaire OPEC Oil God King Nations.....America is so divided, in debt with a dying economy and dollar and full of Democrat traitors sissy gender benders...The smart people and the rich will get the hell out of this dying has been superpower.
What mind?😂
It’s a wonder that Seagal didn’t “win” the Medal of Honor and become a 20 star general in the CIDEA where you could say that he was a technical advisor to a couple of rent-a-cops in the field at Best Buy. And to top it off, he’s a 17th Dan in the deadly art of Aikido which killed no one ever. I heard that he’s a god who can’t be choked out too. I would shit my pants if I could have even half of the imaginary life that he’s got.
I first ran into Seagull in Saigon in '67, we were part of a CIA black ops team but I was amazed when a North Korean battalion hoved into view. We were all panicking but Steven took control and single handedly destroyed the entire battalion with nothing more than a dessert spoon, what a guy!! Of course being so humble Steven would never make this public, as I said, what a guy! Also, his farts smell like unicorns.
He's done that too BTW
@@darthwiizius It is absolutely amazing how skilled trash bird is with kitchen utensils.
@@TheArizonaAssasin
He makes a great lasagna, the best ever, doesn't like to talk about it. What a guy!
You forgot to mention his claims to have trained Anderson Silva and Lyoto Machida to win some of their fights in the UFC lmao 😂
I first met Seagal in in the gulf war, on a black op to find some highly classified VIP. I remember we got ambushed, me and the other guys were spooked but Mr Seagal told us “Don’t worry, I’ll handle them” and then out of nowhere he just began duel wielding RPG’s and took them all out!
"Steven Seagal's a fake, he's a frag. Van Damme is real" is a movie quote that alway comes to mind whenever I see a Steven seagul video on UA-cam 😆😄
That’s Sifu Seagull to you
If he is fake u should show every one and chal look enge him easy to talk behind a screen
@@ugoeze7360 you mean seafood!
@Robert Schoelerman I'm not sure what half of your sentence says, but I imagine you're telling the guy it's easy to talk behind a screen. Well, the guy was quoting someone who said that so chill out lol.
Steven is a walking buffet, who thinks he can play a guitar
I like how it starts off as maybe misremembering a few details, then escalates into embellishments like anyone would do on a resume, to full blown stealing other people's life stories, filling in with completely made up details, and then sprinkle in just not talking when he gets caught doing something outright wrong, like his "massages".
Seagal ... the sitting slapping actor ... lol
Seagal taking other people’s stories and make them his own, is like Gilderoy Lockhart from Harry Potter.
Bingo great comparison! 🎯
Or Hulk Hogan 😂
That's like if he met my stepdad and my stepdad told him stories about how he was a helicopter 🚁 pilot in the army Seagal would take my stepdad's stories and concoct them as his own stories to other people making them believe him
Poor Steven Smeagol, once the evil beard took over he was just along for the buffet.
😂😂😂
Okay thats good lol
Mr Guts, now
Even at his peak I doubt Seagal could do 10 push ups.
He'd call his stuntmen
It's like him doing it
I am disappointed that this video didn't include a mention or photo of Sense Seagal groping actress Katherine Heigl when she was 16 years old.
(If you Google "Steven Seagal grope" it is part of recorded history)
I remember children bragging like that when we were 5 ro 9 years of age. That dude aside of being a narcissist is an adult infant. He has never grown up.
I love how in these old photos from the 80s you can see him going bald but then in his recent pics he has a full head of hair. He learned how to regrow his hair using meditation techniques he learned while training spetsnaz forces.
Not only that, but his perfect black hair colour despite his age and the fake tan is just too sad 😅
Yes because Steven seagals is the only older person to dye his hair and tan himself shameful all these fake tan hair dye people pretty tough talking behind a screen while leaving out all the thing people have validated that seagal has done some lie but not all just as much truth but for u all truth hurts your head and make u look bad all u paper tough guys hdi f behind a screen
It got to scared to carry on going bold
@@rossicourvosi218
He should've gone full bald monk. Now he's known for having a rodent on his head.
He led meal team 6 and overran and destroyed many buffets. He served in many different areas, including arby"s, golden corral, chili's, and was decorated with the order of the golden spoon by his commanding officer chris christy.
He should work as a script writer for Amazon. They love to take other people's stories and pretend they wrote it.
But then all stories would end with "and then I came in and jump kicked the baddies"
Even if it's a picture book of Winnie the Pooh
Steven seagal is probably the greatest actor to never win an oscar. All martial artists are very honest people and never tell lies or exaggerate stories.
I saw Steven Segal at a grocery store in Los Angeles back in 1997 and I told him how cool it was to meet him in person but that I didn’t want to be a douche and bother him and ask him for photos or anything.
He said, “Oh, like yer doing now?” I was taken aback, and all I could say was “Huh?” but he kept cutting me off and going “huh? huh? huh?” and closing his hand shut in front of my face. I walked away and continued with my shopping, and I heard him start chuckling as I walked off. When I came to pay for my stuff up front I saw him trying to walk out the doors with like fifteen Kit Kat bars in his hands without paying for them at all!!
The girl at the counter was very nice about it and professional, and was like “Sir, you need to pay for those first.” At first he kept pretending to be tired and not hear her, but eventually he turned back around and brought them to the counter.
She took one of the bars and started scanning it a few times but he stopped her and told her to scan them each individually “to prevent any electrical infetterence,” and then turned around and winked at me, I don’t even think that’s a real word. After she scanned each bar and put them in a bag and started to say the price, he kept interrupting her by yawning loudly then punched her in the face and snatched the bag off of the counter and ran out of the store, it was absolutely the most based and badass Alpha male move that I have ever seen
Ah yes. The flying lotus
Classic
Damnnnn, this guy has to be one of the biggest fools walking upright. He goes out of his way announcing the fact he's such a miserable tool and that's saying a lot even in Hollyweird. One miserable story after another insuring sea gull's place in a life of douchery
😂 Upvote for the effort you put into that post.
I first ran into Seagull in Saigon in '67, we were part of a CIA black ops team but I was amazed when a North Korean battalion hoved into view. We were all panicking but Steven took control and single handedly destroyed the entire battalion with nothing more than a dessert spoon, what a guy!! Of course being so humble Steven would never make this public, as I said, what a guy! Also, his farts smell like unicorns.
The fact that he wanted to get into the restaurant business is ironic to me because when I met him, I first thought he was a chef.
He's just a cook😅
@@IronMikeDyson1979 *spits in soup* little flavour.
In 1979 I was learning guitar and was a slow learner. One day there was a martial arts demo in a class upstairs. I struggled learning and this guy came by the door and watched. After I stopped he taught me to play the blues.
It was Steven!
Till this day I can’t play guitar.
Lets not forget hes a rapist... and he committed sexual assault to many of the young women he worked with. some of them were younger than 18 at the time
I met Seagal, he was trying to catch the pieces of fish we cut off the Blues we caught in the Ocean.
Dude kept flying in front of the other Seagals and punching them out. They fell to the water and he ate all the fish and was too fat to fly home.
Lol
He still is.
He told a story about how he met Bruce Lee, and that his kid and Bruce's kid were playing with each other (whatever year it was.)
Seagal's kid wouldn't have even been born at that time he supposedly met Bruce Lee lol
go look up a clip where he tells about 6 different interviewers what heritage he is from, he says he is from asia, Italy, America and europe!
@@johnbernhardtsen3008 He's Mario then ?
He never told you anything you don't know him I asked him
Correct
Seagul is one of the worst human beings to have ever lived. absolutely despicable
What did he do to you, or to humankind?
Did you call 'Machete' a 'Spy Kids' spin off??😂
At least Danny Trejo is legit
Seagal is basically what you get if a Wattpad author from 2010 becomes an actor
I caught my husband of 35 years watching one of his movies the other day. Only one thing crossed my mind “Time to get one of those divorce things every one is talking about…”
😂 If it was Under Siege, he deserves one more chance.
@@OkinInc ok, you talked me into keeping him 😉
hm a real keeper would have joined him
Please, have mercy on him... we all have flaws and weakness moments XD
You could get Seagal to draft the divorce...he is the best legal counsel ever
It always makes me wonder what happened to people like this when they were young that caused them to turn out this way. Don't get me wrong I know some people are born with mental illness but 9 times out of 10 some messed up crap happened when they were young that sent them down this road. Doesn't even have to be family that did it. Just being bullied at school could be enough. Just makes me wonder WTF, why???
From what I’ve heard Steven was bullied a lot as a kid and suffered from asthma
Machete was not a spy kids spin off, it was spin off the Grindhouse movies.
They were done by Robert Rodriguez so it was easy to mix up sometimes
Machete was in Spy Kids, also played by Danny Trejo. He did get his movies because of Grindhouse though.
Danny Trejo said his nieces and nephews were all like “all you ever do is play mean chicanos with tattoos.”
His response, “I AM a mean Chicano with tattoos.”
Love Will Sasso's take of Seagal from Mad TV. 😂
It doesn't matter how many Steven Seagal videos I see, they're always awesome. 😊
"Steven Seagal is the most successful action film star in Hollywood history"
(Steven Seagal)
Seagul changes ethnicity very often.. hes probably the only 50% native american, 50% Japanese, 50% russian and 50% everything else i have ever heard about.. and yea Seagul always gives atleast 200% if in doubt 🤣
I wouldn't be surprised he said he has some African in him
THIS MANS IMAGINATION IS WILD !!!
I wouldn't say biggest lair in Hollywood, but he is definitely up there 😂
But he ain't a pedo. I think 🤔
@joonya66 lol as much as I hate pedos, that does not make his actions any better. All evil and sociopathic people deserve the same time and punishment.
@@mattladuke3992 liked the guy when he first came on the scene then he just become too much. Don't believe a lot of the I read about him surely no one is that off. But if you dont know him personally you can only go buy what you hear and read.
@@joonya66 Possibly his only redeeming quality.
@@joonya66 he is
I'll advise you to stop trashing SENSEI SEAGAL , otherwise I'll find you and after uncomfortably staring at you at least 10 minutes, buddy I'll get up and do absolutely nothing as I triumphantly walk away from the stare contest I'm liable to win
YOU'VE BEEN WARNED ⚠️
*In his next movie Sensei Seagal will use all his acting abilities to play Nessie the Lochness monster in "Lochness vs the Vegetarian Ninja Cannibals".*
I think he used Frank Dux as an inspiration, and ran with it. 😂
It was Steven Seagal that saved the day..all by himself at Macho Grande..someone should invent a hamburger and name it after him..such a true and wonderful American hero..I'm not crying it's just the dust in my eyes...yours very truly Alfonso Cantu USMC
You had it right the first time… Aikido as an effective fighting style isn’t real.
"Excuse me officer, why would you get Steven Seagal to teach martial arts to your recruits?"
"Well we don't want them HURTING anyone"
0:52 I like the idea that a Yakuza protagonist will fight a Seagal knockoff
He is the creator and master of Slap and Arm-Flail Fu.
I saw him as a walmart greeter. He was giving out free black hair dye and diet tips
In the mid-70s I was taking lessons in Shitoru-style karate from Fumio Demura in his Santa Ana dojo across from Santa Ana College. I was 16 and 17 and I even got to work at the Japanese village and Deer Park that was in Garden Grove. We performed Karate demonstrations with Fumio and some of the black-belts that helped in the classes. Fumio was a great guy and I have such fond memories of my time at the dojo. Fumio drew a picture of a Japanese Zero airplane for me, I think I still have it somewhere. I also met Dan Ivan and his son whose name I can't remember right now and one of the very highly esteemed senseis from Okinawa where Fumio was from.
Getting to know the truth about Seagal lately makes me wonder if he was a bullied kid in school. Becoming such a horrible person was his coping mechanism 😂
This was unexpected but excellent. How much is Pierce Hawthorne worth?
Later he became a much bigger action star by about 140lbs.🤣I call him Sickgal.
Seagal reminds me of Billy Ray Valentine (Trading Places). The part where he's faking that he has no legs, and trying to trick 2 cops: "I was in 'Nam. The orange agent, that's how they called me". But Eddy Murphy was hilarious on that movie (and almost every movie he's been in), and Seagal... well... is Seagal.
He didn't just train Bruce Lee - he GAVE BIRTH to him. You can still see the scar from the caesarean.
South Park bodied him
Did. So did Madtv back in the day. Will Sasso used to kill it.
MadTv was always much funnier than SNL.
I will literally watch anything that makes fun of Steven segal
His biggest achievement was destroying Kelly LeBrock’s career! Good job Steven LeDuche!
Seagal's personality is VERY similar to L. Ron Hubbard, who would make up anything about himself to show how beyond a normal human's ability he was.
How about a piece on how he hooked up with Kelly Lebrock.. in the early 90’s, I saw the two of them walk into an antique store I lived above, I yelled “seagulls a kook” then ducked, when I peered over the window sill a few seconds later he was staring up at me like I owed him a hundred grand
Steven Seagal won connect 4 in 3 moves, slammed a revolving door and invented the question mark.
Takes other people’s stories.
Makes himself the protagonist.
Tells them to other people.
Gosh!!! All pathological liars I know have the same style.
I think Seagal has been in on the joke the whole time. History's greatest troll
Could he be a modern day Andy Kaufman? Perhaps this is all orchestrated.
He lacks the intellect, discipline, and comedic talent to tell a knock-knock joke. Even though he invented the concept of comedy, back when he was a 3 year old working as the warm up act for the all-black blues band he joined two years later. That was around the same time he was approached by the C.I.A. for advice whilst he was talking to Bruce Lee.
@@leewright1 'He lacks the intellect, discipline, and comedic talent to tell a knock-knock joke.'
TBF so did Andy Kaufman . . .
Seagal - "I just read the best manuscript in the world"
Actor - Okay nice who wrote it
Seagal - I DID !!! 😆
😂😂😂
This is the reverse Chuck Norris Comments section.
A lot of celebs and himself have said he’s had multiple underage (mostly 14 years old) girls
He's a pervert and criminal and needs to be in jail.
Eating vulnerable adolescents is the worst of all crimes.
Above The law and Marked For Death are his best movies.
Are they?😂
Yes, they are, especially, Above The Law. Under Siege is just an Die Hard rip-off.
Seagal being from Michigan explains everything
Steven Seagal has a Black belt in Bullshinto!
He just finished up his latest blockbuster hit movie called ENTER THE BUFFET!!
Was he really one of Hollywood's greatest action stars? No one was clamoring about going to his movies. Nor were they ever a topic for discussion. He was a B-movie actor at best and I use actor very loosely.
Flat out false. He was a huge action star in the 80s and 90s, and his first 4 films were some of the highest grossing action films ever. Seagal and Van Damme dominated the martial arts action movie market back then.
You'd know this if you grew up in the 80s and 90s.
@@AztecUnshaven Maybe to you. I lived through the 80s and no one was talking up Steven Seagal. Bruce Willis. Mel Gibson. Arnold. Stallone. BIG-time action stars. Seagal. Not so much.
@@christophermoshier You're bullshitting lol. Why did Seagal's action films in the 80s have such a high grossing box office then? Whether we like it or not, his movies were huge back then. How do you think big stars like Sharon Stone, Pam Grier, Gary Busey, Forsythe, Keith David, were all part of his early films?
You're letting your dislike of Seagal blind your judgement. Seagal also worked as a stunt coordinator by the way. He was the Samurai culture/Jujutsu advisor on Scott Glenn's 1981 film "The Challenge" (filmed in Japan).
@@AztecUnshaven i cant agree.. Seagull was way down the list.. behind especially chuck Norris, Dolph Lundgren, van Damme, Stallone, Bruce Willis, Arnold.. when it comes to the 80's.. in the 90's it might have looked a bit different, but one of the best or most liked he never was.
He was always a B-movie actor. And if in doubt just look up his net worth through the years, it paints a very clear picture about his low status as an actor.
@@jimmywayne983 I like Dolph and Chuck Norris, but they never had any hugely successful A list action films. Dolph's biggest film was Rocky 4, but that wasn't really "Dolph's" film, it was Stallone's.
By contrast, Seagal's net worth in the 80s and 90s was HUGE. His first 4 action films broke box office records and were some of the highest grossing action films at that time. You can look up the records yourself, this is a fact.
Seagal's Box Office worth didn't start dropping down until after "On Deadly Ground", which made decent money in theaters, but nowhere near the success of his previous films. By 1997, both Van Damme and Seagal's box office worth was starting to drop big time. Even Stallone was starting to struggle with his films by the late 90s. Chuck Norris only B movie level, but had success on TV with his "Walker Texas Ranger" TV show. Dolph's career fell off completely by that point.
The key difference here between Seagal and the rest of them, is that Stallone finally made a big Hollywood comeback, with movies like Cop Land, and eventually "The Expendables". He helped save Dolph's career with this movie and got Dolph back into triple A films (like Aquaman).
Seagal on the other hand, never really made a comeback into the triple A movie scene, aside from his small role with Danny Trejo in "Machete". By this time he involved in many other things outside of films, including police work in Louisiana and Arizona, politics in Eastern Europe, etc.
*HE RUNS LIKE A GIRL OSTRICH*
Steven Seagal is Chuck Norris on the high on a different dimension.
He's every Chuck Norris joke in reverse.
On the set and off the set of filming, his acting, or bullshitting, never stops. And hasn't stopped for almost 40 years.
Steven Seagal is actually 200 years old and has fought Martin tripods, King Kong and can roundhouse a Grizzly bear through a barn door.
each fight before his breakfast !!!
What's the song that's playing at 10:30?
Impossible, forget this story
I think we need an Anatomy of Seagal video.
What's the deeper meaning of Seagal? 🤔
"...noticed how quick on his feet Seagal was". He has never been quick on his feet. His hands WERE fast, but most ppl can bitchslap fairly quickly anyway so....
Sometimes I feel bad for loving these videos but then I remember.................I LOVE 4 of his first 5 movies. Hard To Kill just didn't do it for me which says a LOT with Kelly LeBrock in it. I like Exit Wounds too as a guilty pleasure because I liked Toronto. He was meant to entertain. Thanks to people like you, he does. Salute!!