Pp I need help I'm trying to divorce my wife she's a doctor but she's a narcissist and I've been in jail for stalking and 20 other felony charges and I didn't need convicted or nothing but a misdemeanor because she's a liar and I have proof I need a lawyer and I need help I'm by myself she done exactly what you say she do
@@rshnewton who cares if they know it. They will keep their eye on you. My ex used her flying monkeys after she left. I ended up getting married and having kids with someone else and just like I expected, she called a few years later.. furious
Yes, they like and enjoy to see people looking and behaving in a negative way. Its food and drink to them. They , like to see a person looking like they feel.
Getting better: 1. You’re educating yourself and figuring it out 2. Getting help 3. You’re not longer feeling as triggered by the narc, you are observing their behaviour 4. You see how weak and insecure they are 5. You experience no more fear when dealing with the narc x
When you can look back on all the trauma they caused and view it as personal growth and know in your soul it’s made you a better person you’ve healed 👏
It's Time to Break Free for Good...Let's Do This! Sign up for our free webinar and start your transformative journey- slay.rebeccazung.com/outsmart-narc 💪
YES, EVER SINCE I WAS 12 YEAR OLD KID, I KNEW, IF THINGS DONE DELIBERATELY / ON PURPOSELY WRONG & CONTINIEING IT, THAT IS IRREGULAR - NONE SENSE & DOWN TO EARTH STUPID / CRAZY!! I MAKE ONCE A WHILE MISTAKENLY WRONG THINGS TOO. BUT I TRY TO RACTIFY THEM / FIX THEM! AS MOST OF US DO TOO! THANK YOU REBECCA ZUNG! YOU'VE HELPED ME, MANY VARIOUS DIFFERENT TIMES, WITHIN THISPAST 1 1/2 YEAR. MANY THANKS. + HAVE A SUCCESSFUL NICE DAY!
Narcs always go after successful ppl, ppl with money, ppl from good families, attractive with high self esteems, ppl doing well in life, ppl that are very confident and self assured just so they can break you and make you weak, codependent, insecure, doing things solely for their approval and needy for them only to break you. Tear you apart. Take you from that high point you were at when you met them to a low point where u don’t even recognize yourself anymore because you’re such a different person from the person you once were because that’s exactly what they feed off of💯
I feel like my ex-narc would click on these videos thinking they're the victim for devaluing and discarding me and watch these videos for validation about how shitty I was but when they run into the comment section and see a comment like yours, they immediately click off because they then realize THEY'RE the narc. After 6 years from the initial discard, I'm finally gaining some sustenance life force back!
@@artistelaine1061 you mean I'm not the super hero I thought I was.who would want that impossible job.im stealth Rider,night hawk,pick out a name.i can save all of you.see my finger,....I have two.four if you're drunk.im fine just being me.wanna play!?😜🤗😱😎👍💪😬🦇🕷️🕸️👽👼👹👼👹👼👹 Trying to make you laugh.try it.works for me.
This totally explains why he tried so hard to insert himself with my time and life in the beginning of meeting him. I was on my A Game in my career (albeit locally), and he would ask questions about what I was doing professionally at the time. Then when I expressed via text conversation that I was looking to go to another city to study my craft further, he called me right there and then and told me “locally, you’re you. There: you’re not special”. Well, eff that! He’s not in my life anymore and I’m in the process of leveling up.
Rebecca, I so admire your "Never give in. Never give up." attitude. I too will not stop the fight of resisting these ugly monsters, of revealing them to the world, and taking back control over my own identity, my life and my self worth.
Finally, I am done with the covert narcissist I’ve been dealing with for the past 3 1/2 years. Just moved out of the house we both lived at. I can’t explain how relieving and freeing it is. Now I continue to heal myself
I didn’t realize my ex was a narcissist or at least had narcissistic traits until after I broke up with him. I felt liberated, but I’m still a little angry. However, I won’t let him steal my glory and self worth.
3:52 2. They wanted you to feel isolated. When my toxic ex-coworker said to me something like "Everyone thinks so," I said to him "I really understand everyone thinks so, but I'm going to do what I want. It's my own thing." That was okay.
I've been with a narcissist for over 22 years and right now I'm planning for my own future and while I am still dealing with him I realize now how insecure he is.
Ha ha good for you! Yes! I had a similar victory when stuck still living with my soon-to-be-ex when I began my divorce right before Covid hit (causing eviction moratoriums so I couldn’t find rental housing to move into 🤦🏼♀️and our courts closed so we couldn’t finish the divorce process🤦🏼♀️🤦🏼♀️) He’d TELL me what he demanded I do and I politely listened and replied even-toned: ‘I understand that’s what you want to have me do, but I disagree so I’m going to do what I want to do instead’ and walked away. Boy, was he left flat-footed! Also, he’d rage over me ‘telling’ someone an awful thing he’d done (i.e., I was no longer keeping his toxic nature behind closed doors but revealing it to the world and tearing back the walls of my isolation) and that person had been upset with him and he turned around and BLAMED ME. It was all my fault that person was upset with him 🙄I looked him square in the eye and said: my TELLING what you did is NOT the BAD THING. YOU DOING the bad thing, that’s what they are upset about.
My covert narcissistic neighbour loves to tell me that everyone hates me. If she says it again I'm going to say calmly "Margaret, that's fine with me. I don't hate them. Just because I think they're c**ts doesn't mean that I hate them" and smile sweetly. It's obvious that her worst nightmare is to feel hated. She has no idea that I'm cool with being hated. Understanding how they think is really helpful. I've just got to get better at keeping my cool although it is extremely hot today!
That’s their fav line! “Everyone thinks so!” 🤣 Everyone is them and their scared toxic hand full of people who know who they truly are. Omg I heard this so much. Lol Not everyone because not my true people. They want you to think that. Idc tho. I know who I am! I know who he is. All I need to know. They have no true “everyone” friends or etc. just supply. 👍
I dealt with the worst kind of narcissistic. After a year of weekly counseling I have come back stronger. I swept him under the rug. Making friends. Doing all the things I love. Rarely think of him. Learned to love myself & I am worthy of happiness & peace.
My mom hated it when I would read books! All of my books were self-help. I remember her yelling at me one day for not doing something that she never asked me to do and when I brought up that fact she said, “All you do is read your damn spiritual books!” I was like, “The Bible!!??” I was reading more than the Bible, but she didn’t like that I started to give my time and energy to myself and my daughter. I’m 40, and moved back in with my parents after several failed relationships. I kept attracting narcissist. I realized it was my conditioned behavior (their parenting) from childhood that kept opening the door to be taken advantage of. I am healing from this.
@@MsBrown7777 You can get better! It’s going to be an uphill battle, but worth it. I wrote the above post over a year ago, and my life is completely turned around. Therapy works ❤️ I’ve been no contact for that year with most of my family and my mental health is so much better for it.
I absolutely believe it! Per God, "you will see the goodness of God in the land of the living." Just one thing is needed. I haven't signed on that line. Happy to get out of everyone's hair when there is a tiny bit of restoration of what I co-built, co-established and co-earned/grew, as well as privacy and situational freedom. I'm so simple that way. I need groceries and I have some people to take care of and help protect (per Scripture). Ultimate justice is illusive this side of heaven-I'm not going to get those 16 critical years (ravaged by a syndicated defamation/cancellation/long-term campaign) back: career, finances, vacations with kids, dignity stolen, creative side-hustles, but a little measure of it should encourage everyone, especially Christians.
I have a daughter… I am 76, she is 53… I have been dealing with her narcissistic behavior since she was about 20-21. We have been estranged and then reconnected then estranged again. I never understood what was affecting our relationship. Now I see clearly what I am up against. I recently just told her “I am finished”. I hung up on her ranting. I also have twin boys who are 14 months younger and her…. Her relationship with them has been the same as mine but maybe not as severe because they were not as “understanding “. I felt ( I raised them as a single parent with no contact with their father until they were adults) I needed to be the “constant” empathized, caring, loving person. Oh, how wrong I’ve been. I hope it’s not too late but I am at peace now and that feels amazing!!! Thanks for the videos!!!
Thank you. It is really assuring that I am on the right track. Your comment on the narcs getting worse just before they give up is very encouraging to know.
I've been free of my gaslighter since February and I've had some time for self reflection. I was about to cut ties with my gaslighterafter a 10+ year friendship but those ties were cut for me. She died. It wasn't easy coming to the realization I had to come to but it helped when I was able to acknowledge it. Even though it wasn't easy to deal with her, what I needed to do came easier and I'm able to go to sleep at night with a sense of peace instead of what others have to go to sleep with. I wish more people could go to sleep with the same sense of peace after terrible things they've had to endure. The biggest thing that helped me was aquiring knowledge like what comes from videos like this and other sources on the subject. Way more valuable than any fighting training I've had. It helped to know exactly what I was dealing with and made things like being gaslit easier to endure. Thanks Rebecca for what you share here. You do make a difference.
Just came across you and this video, started educating myself after 1,5 of no contact with my narc who made my life a living HELL. Thank you, amazing content!
When my ex gave me the "everybody else" says so, I asked for names. After he stuttered for a while, he finally came up with two of his friends names. I replied with, "I should have said, idiots. Give me names of someone who ascribes (too big a word for him) who is not an Idiot." That eliminated "everybody else." They all knew he was spewing lies. "A good name is better than silver or gold."
In oct 1987 at age 33 dad passed away, I went to funeral home, the Narcissist ex started grilping about everything, i got out of car on highway , never made it to dads resting place, did not want to take the scene to buriel, every one wondered where i was. Push and push , 9 times swore i hit her, bounced 13 checks in one week, $300 each plus $35 for each check. I filed for devorce paid $10,000 over 3 years. Never got to see kids, $503 for kids thru department of justice. Slandered , and strip of all rights. Then one day after work daughter let her mom into my bathtub. Did not know all about Narcisst, but I had so much anger in me i had to be alone. Flying monkeys hoovering lost my trust. Policy was do not cast your shadow on my driveway. I would tell you i dealt with my anger for a good twenty years. I believe only God had a right to take life, that saved me and all the narrsist i have met. This gal is spot on as accurate down to a science. Adult children of alcoholics , I read that back in 1980 it was spot on in every disfunctional family. 1st child born same Characteristic in each family 1 thru 5 th child same. Scape goat, caretaker, and other . All are mental conditions , and most from abuse, Rape, mental abuse, a child not being afforded the right to mental mature in a healthy enviroment. Forgive. But donot feel you have to be a door mate to anyone.
Rebecca is so accurate on this. My patients and staff keep telling me my wife was a narcissist I didn’t know what that was. I just thought she had some mental issues or going through the change. I have broken her and we are getting divorced now but I always thought it was me. She is just another person and she doesn’t trigger me at all. Thanks so much for the great video’s and education!!
You are on point!!… I’ve only gotten stronger and now I help a lot of my friends who are with Narcissist. It’s sad to see them being abused…. Plus I’m learning more about myself which is the most important part
If you are so sick of the drama, trauma, and chaos- and want real powerful strategies for success - I’ve got the answer for you - sign up for our free webinar and start your transformative journey- this is the day your life changes! Woohoo! www.icanslay.com 🌀✨
I am definitely looking through a different lens as I’m living myself more… and don’t get triggered as fast or often anymore… so thank you girl the beaming confirmation! But still hurt about the situation I’m in… as I want out… so trying to educate myself on my rights, a plan… so hard when everything costs … to get help you need .
By watching and similar videos from others I did not realize I had already defeater the narcissist. Thank you thank you! I will never be able to thank you enough
I'm on stage 4.8! Almost! It's been almost 6 months. The recent AH case really brought back some memories. Thank you for sharing all the useful information with us. It's been so helpful for my healing and defeating process.
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This is so encouraging to keep growing with knowledge. Thank you for dedicating your time to this. It needs to be a movement since it can’t be seen. 👍🏼👍🏼👍🏼
This information broke my heart. It reminded me of my childhood when I was treated like this... oh, my... I wish I hadn't learned their lessons so well because I became like them. Now to undo the past and learn anew. This must be why we "marry our parents"... we think that kind of behavior is "normal" and it's familiar, whereas real closeness is scary because the parents were not safe, so we see potential danger in all relationships. Thank you, Rebecca.
My only child stopped talking to me about a year ago. I miss my grandkids, but I do not miss the non - stop angry gaslighting. I'm going to be ok, thanks to videos like this!
Yup that's true 👍. No reaction is the best way of reacting to them. Self-control is what people need in order to defeat these bitter people. You have to control your emotions in order not to give any reaction. Narcissist respect empath highly intuitive, with strong character, disciplined, wise, discerned person. Narcissist are not wise because their insecurity is in them, they have no worth in themselves. Narcissist are bullies if you think about it, they're all pathetic.
I think I realised that I finally defeated my ex narc when he said he could have any women he wanted, and I told him to not let the door hit him in the a** on the way out! He looked like such a wounded child! Of course, then the phoney tears and apologies insued, but by then I was just over his nonsense and constant devaluing of me. Narc free over a year now, and I'm educating myself and finally LIVING!!! 🙂
Yes.. why isn't their videos on this topic in the workplace 🤦🏻♀️ I've been in a smear campaign from a narcissist manager for the past 6 months and it's been hard
@@ThatoneLisa I hear you Lisa had a few of those in my time. Luckily I was able to move to the country and now just have horses and cows for neighbours. Hopefully you can change your situation
Thank you soooo much.... You are such a blessing...and those supporting each other and the sponsors of your videos... Thank you all for being such a massive strength to everyone.. 🙏❤️
I've come across lot's of UA-cam material on the subject. But this practical analysis and encouragement here is bar none the best and most useful. I barely ever comment on UA-cam but this lady knows and it clearly comes from profound experience. Really really good strategies! So helpful. My clarity and focus have enhanced 100%
Now...I thoroughly understand their behavior, I don't feel triggered and I'm no more afraid of them....now I can deal with them....by the I have two narcissists in my life...my husband's mother and his sister....suffered silently for 24 long year...previously couldn't understand them...totally confused...depressed....so scared of them...theses videos and the understanding I'm getting...they giving my life back.... I don't know how to thank you...God bless you for helping people in distress...
That's right. It's what, but not who, you are dealing with. Narcs are not persons in the way we usually think of them. As soon as you depersonalize it, you start to understand it's a thing not a person. Also, it will go on and find new supply within minutes of your going no contact or setting boundaries up for which you demand respect. They're not worth a second of your pity.
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I already walked away forever. I will never see or talk to this person that’s done this to me for 34 years and then they told on themselves to me. I was stupid about it and had to educate myself but now my eyes are open.
Through my darkest hours when i dont have someone to talk about my Problem its a God sent your videos pop up on this tube and i started to fallow your advice I'm already winning. Thank you so much for your help
My covert narcissistic neighbour just accused me of throwing dog poo in her hedge. I kept repeating that she is in control (they are preventing us from selling our house - long story). All our neighbours need to do is cooperate to solve the problem but they are getting off on having control over our lives. I get better at dealing with them and calling them out but I still find it hard not to shout. The lies they spew and their twisting of the truth is so frustrating. Her husband told my husband that I should be locked up. I told him he is spineless and is controlled by his wife. He made a lunge at me and I said it's your wife who you really want to slap, not me. I understand the dynamics so much better but need to work on keeping detached. It's so difficult!
I know this now !!! I’m trying to forget about him . Of course I can’t not 100% but I’m start educating right now . Taking class and go to gym and work hard . I’m doing so well now . Much much less stress out . And feeling good . He is trying to call me but I’m not call back . And he know when he supposed to call me if he really want to talk to me . But he is just checking call . Like he want me to call him seems like it . But I’m not call him . I’m just start happy by myself . Thank you Dr Zung 🙏😊❤️
If you are so sick of the drama, trauma, and chaos- and want real powerful strategies for success - I’ve got the answer for you - sign up for our free webinar and start your transformative journey- this is the day your life changes!>>slay.rebeccazung.com/outsmart-narc ✨
12 years I been dealing with a narracissist. But you know the truth of the matter, i don't even blame them because I saw the signs early on and I continue to stay there because I fell in LOVE, and I realize that it was a tool for them to feed on to give a false sense of love, and they fed on that in their ability to control and manipulate me. real love is NOT in them. They use that emotion only to get what they want and need. So if they say they love you it's not real. It's a ploy to give you just a little hope to keep you in their selfish life.
Wow. No truer words have been spoken...or written. That's what I was experiencing in my relationship with her. I kept telling myself to get out before it gets worse, or be discarded and be the villian. I didnt listen...guess what?? I stuck around for 18 months, and I went from hero to villian with a broken heart while she moved onto to her ex boyfriend for new supply. Just evil. Little does she know...once I heal, I'll be even stronger and her games will have NO effect on me. Then we'll see who's crying....
IF I MAY COMPLIMENT YOU & THANK YO ALSO REBECCA? = OF ALL THE PSYCHOLOGISTS - PSICHIATRISTS AND LAW EXPLAINERS? IT IS YOU REBECCA ZUNG. YOU GAVE ME MOST OF THE BEST POINTERS, WHAT TO - HOW TO & WHY / WHY NOTS?! ' ' - THANK YOU VERY MUCH! ' ' MUCH APPRECIATED THEM! - 🌺 -
I work with one and he is the most horrible person I have ever met. I recognized that he was childish, envious, and a liar, and I had heard the term narcissist before but I had never had to deal with one. So when I started realizing he was psycho, I limited my contact with him even though it was difficult working at a small company and being one of three in my department. So I began to ignore him and just keep walking when he would speak to me and I thought he would get bored and eventually leave me alone. But that just caused him to double down until his behavior became just absolutely ridiculous. I would come near him and he would start hitting and kicking things and just make alot of noise. So one day this senior citizen, this adult man, pulled a chair out from under me as I went to sit down so I proceeded to curse him out. It felt good and everyone was there so noe he is not allowed to speak to me nor I him but I'm good with that. I was ignoring him without being told to for at least 6 months before that anyway. This guy doesn't know how many grandchildren he has nor their names because his kids haven't spoken to him in many years. My children and I are very close and he hates that I know.
My fave ‘I beat him’ moment was when negotiating over splitting assets. I researched all the values, came to the negotiating table with that info in-hand. But know-it-all (who’d done no research had no proof for anything he claimed) wanted to be in charge. So I’d name an asset and ask him what he thought it was worth. If he named a figure much higher than my research proved, I simply agreed with him, split it in 1/2 and moved down the list (he never asked for my value bc it inflated his ego that I thought he was right 🤣) if he named a value way too low, I brought out my research (which he knew I could present to court) so because I had documented proof he’d accept it and likewise quickly move on so as not to dwell on any possibility he’d been mistaken. He NEVER caught on! My second fave ‘I beat him’ moment was when we were separated and he’d try to hoover me into his drama and control with REPEATED demands via email. At first, still in trauma-bond-mode, I’d reply ASAP impotently defending my boundaries since I’d already said ‘no’ yet he wasn’t accepting ‘no’ and I reverted to ‘over explaining’ mode. But then it hit me: once I’d said ‘no’ I actually had nothing further to say. EVER. No matter WHAT he said or did. Further, I also came to realize that just bc he’d emailed me that didn’t mean I HAD TO read it or respond in any time frame that HE dictated/demanded. I LET MY FEAR GO. And went and did any number of things that were rebuilding my life and creating greater separation from him. I realized that if I did ‘x’ he could rage. If I did ‘y’ he could rage. And, frankly, if I did absolutely f-ing nothing he could STILL rage. Nothing I did or didn’t do stopped him bc he alone chose the toxic path he took. (Like Capt Speirs in Band of Brothers, I became FEARLESS accepting that whatever happened wasn’t in my control)❤️I wish everyone reading this that same fearlessness and POWER 👊🏼
Not that you need an atta girl from me but here it is. I'm practicing some of the same things you mentioned. (With other people in my life) I'm triggered when people try to control me. I don't react though, Pause say a prayer and say or do what I feel is appropriate and sometimes that consists of absolutely freak'n nothing. God bless you and your healing journey.
Thank you, Rebecca, for all you do for all of us!! I recently moved to my own place after renting a room from a covert narc for 18 months. Am letting all on this podcast know that it will take a while to settle down into feeling normal again. At least, that's my experience so far. Am happy that there are lots of people that I love and receive their love and support in return. A third roommate moved in 7 months ago and it has just dawned on me that she is also a narc!! My research tells me that they attract each other. Yuk Yuk Narc Narc!! I briefly met the woman who rented my old room and my immediate impression is that she is an Overt Narc! What a wild and strange world. Hope these comments may help others. The second Covert was more passive-aggressive and lied more than the first Covert, but got fooled because she was always talking about how much she didn't like #1 at all and what a narc #1 was. Am slowly recovering and happy that I have done so much inner work and therapy many years ago. Have also been sober for 36 years due to the miracles in Alcoholics Anonymous. Highly suggest Al-Anon for anyone whose narc has addictions. And if anyone here has a problem with alcohol or other drugs, please go to AA. You will find tons of support for anything you are dealing with in these 2 wonderful organizations!! I promise. Love and support to all, Jo
Helped me immensely. I'm only on my 6th day of no contact. Your comment helps prepare me for the fact years will be involved here. Just thankyou. Northern California, 2 days after Thanksgiving 2022
@@jeffwhisman7990 Oh, Jeff, so happy to hear from you and that my comment helped! I don't think it will take years. I recently bought a meditation-type book for a male friend. There were so many positive things in it so that he can realize how wonderful he is and build self-esteem. Something like this will also be helpful for you, I believe. Keep up the good work and I hope you will find happy, healthy friends! 😬😬 Jo
It's Time to Break Free for Good...Let's Do This! Sign up for our free webinar and start your transformative journey- slay.rebeccazung.com/outsmart-narc 💪
IT SHOWS VERY WELL, THAT REBECCA ZUNG IS, AMMONG LOTS OF PEOPLE, DOES HAV VARIOUS DIFFERENT GOOD EDUCATION, SHE USES IT FOR THE GOOD OF I A - AND SHARES IT WITH US. SUMMING ALL THINGS, EDUCATION AND THE USE OF IT CAN BE, & IS AVERY DANGEROUS DEFENSIVE AS WELL AS OFENSIVE HEAPON!
IT'S EASY TO SAY, BUT SOON AS SOME ONE / /ONE OF US RECOGNIZE A NARCISSIT, GIVE THEM THE COLD SHOULDER??!1 I DID, THEY - IN PLURAL, THEY STARTED TO MAKE ARIOT / BRAWE / FIGHT AGAINST ME! I MEAN 5 OF THERM! I SIMPLY DIDN'T ANSWER!AS IF THEY WERE N O T T H E R E A T A L !FOR ABOUT 7 MINUTES?!! AND THEY HAD NOTHING - NOTHING AT ALL, TO GO ON!! THEY CHOKED ONTHEIT OWN ARROGANCE ANDATTACKS!
I totally love the logic & wisdom in the 4 Agreements! Totally applicable in all instances too. For example, when the families of Jeffrey Dahmer's victims were screaming at him in the courtroom, after he was found guilty of raping and eating them, they should have remembered Agreement: 2. "DON’T TAKE ANYTHING PERSONALLY. Nothing others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won’t be the victim of needless suffering." I must ask, can one REALLY/TRULY be immune to the actions of others, even if those actions are exceptionally sick and brutal crimes? Obviously, people have to grieve, move on, & forgive (if possible), but as a society, I will claim that we should never accept evil or atrocity, committed by others or ourselves, but should emphatically condemn these acts, lest we become desensitized to our own selfish demise. It is no mystery why Narcissism is a major and growing problem in our society. We are trending ever more in the direction of pleasing and gratifying ourselves at the expense of, and without regard to others. If we don't take moral and ethical responsibility, it will get worse, with more families and relationships torn apart. And that is where the "Needless Suffering" comes forth.
🎯 actually really easy to beat them because like you said - their so,so insecure + when you go forth & living your best life possible and don’t look back & believe me - they are checking in on you. They go from smirk, quiet, gaslight stage & then avoiding you … that’s when they know - that you know … it’s a done deal !
You are so very good in providing best advice when we need it. Going to Court next week and better prepared due to YOU. Thank you for being here for all of us dealing with these mean controlling bullies in our lives.🙏
Giving you encouragement... narcs are liars, exploiters and thieves. No boundaries or conscience means theft. Speaking as one who was ruined by a narc, I say act now. You cannot help the narc, but the narc will always hurt you and your family. There is nothing to save but yourself and those you truly love.
Rebecca Zung thank you so much. really appreciate your help in living my best life. Some of your teaching go back over 30 years.you have given me understanding of the our Father Suside. Powerless and alone are victims of this mhi.living his same life not knowing fully what happen till these exact same people in my life did it to me. There has been so many covert narcissist in my life trying to get at me just like this JD trial. Raised by one devorsed one married to one right now. This has cost my Daughter 22 years. Of being with her father. God Bless You Rebecca Happy Father's Days
Thank you Rebecca! I have been dealing with a narcissist brother. I never thought he was till after our mom died. He isn’t who I thought he was. He is suing me for my inheritance that our mom wanted me to have. It’s been going on since she died 2018. He is such a liar. I know he is weak! Waiting to go to court. I have paperwork what my mom wanted me to have he is making up lies” and trying to get around what the paperwork actually says. I’m not giving in to him I am fighting him to the end.
Ignoring the red flags, and not admitting these things exist is truly not reality. You can't fix a cheater, a psychopath, or a narcissist, it's as simple as you can't take blood from stone. these smart phone devices in people's hands have taken them away from real individuality, not until I got closure on my husband I was in the dark. We create our reality and the consciousness of the planet is accelerating. This means people have to become more aware of who they are. When one experiences abuse, you first become aware of the abuse, then realizing you are a victim, With healing and processing comes strong boundaries built by confidence in your worth. After this comes a realization that the experience made you stronger and more of who you are and that the narcissist was simply a vehicle for your growth. Ultimately you then realize we are all a creation of our energetic spiritual energy and the narcissist was and is a part of us. In the end, we become accepting of the experience and knowing we would never go back to the previous unawakened and unenlightened version of ourselves. It is not by any means an easy journey and is filled with pain especially when we incarnate into a family with a parent of such characteristics. There is a plan and it is ultimately to drive us. You would love an awakened version of you. My husband was a deceptive narcissist and sociopath, he would never apologize, I was always made to feel little on the inside, it was pure psychological warfare at its lowest, I suspected infidelity on his path, not until with the help of the developer of an app code name rat9 for accessing his device without having to physically touch it, with a functionality to view deleted chats and messages as well as call logs and in-app chats, I was completely in the dark. There was a Conversation I read on his Instagram Account where he did address me as 'beauty with no brains'. I'm finally going through a divorce with evidences too overwhelming. His device contained secrets that I could never have imagined. If in need of such help, write directly to the developer on email ' ethandavydova at gmail dot com '.
It's Time to Break Free for Good...Let's Do This! Sign up for our free webinar and start your transformative journey- slay.rebeccazung.com/outsmart-narc 💪
Thank you for the 5 way on you might already have escaped the narcissist. My wife is a narcissist. I am married since 15 years. I found out 3 month ago. Since then I worked on escape strategies. Although I still have a tendency to fall in for her behavior, I can adjust in a short time. The main knowledge was, not to explain or justify or blame anything on her. Just be honest (except money issues) and treat her like a stranger. Sort of an alien with special properties. 🤭😋🥰
Check this out!! Redefine the way you view challenges in high-conflict negotiations. Our training will show you how to turn trials into triumphs >> highconflictcert.com/ 💪🚀
I broke a 6mo relationship with a narcisist, 4 months were awesome last 2 hell, I couldn't have a normal conversation because as I was told am not that intelligent, couldn't comment on the news because there were depressing! Per him I couldn't drive or fix anything, totally untrue Am a very successful woman, who volunteers on a charity that does construction, I can tile a whole home am great with a hammer. He totally wanted me to depend on him! I finally and calmly said, I know who I am and above all what am not. And walked away. He is on depression meds is a recovering alcoholic, did not know that till 4 months into. Am back being a happy lady surrounded by loving family and friends..sadly he has no kids no connection with his siblings. Thank you
Thank you! This makes me feel better. You helped me so much, I am a valuable person, that's why they picked me. I have educated myself self about them. I still get a little triggered, but not as much. I beat them and they are pathetic .
Check this out!! Redefine the way you view challenges in high-conflict negotiations. Our training will show you how to turn trials into triumphs >> highconflictcert.com/ 💪🚀
You are so so right he says everybody else thinks I’m fucking great everybody else thinks I’m wonderful and I’m like yeah that’s cause you’re fake with them your real side comes out on me God you guys know so much
Yep I defeated the narcissist I was married to for over 40 years, He killed himself Right in front of me He didn't want to live without me So yeah I defeated him But I don't feel good or right about Narcissist need so much to thrive in any capacity they have the ability to They need a lot of love They are sad human beings
Check this out!! Redefine the way you view challenges in high-conflict negotiations. Our training will show you how to turn trials into triumphs >> highconflictcert.com/ 💪🚀
Rebecca, thank you so much for this information. I really needed this encouragement. It's a daily struggle for me in my situation but I'm making progress and you're helping keep me motivated and strong. It really means a lot. Thank you!
I'd say once it hits you (how repetitive their messages are and how they only talk about themselves) yes you get a cold flash and become unemotional, but then you realize this was all a fantasy and then you crash on the ground for weeks. You start asking, begging, explaining, pleasing and you still don't get an adult interaction you'd expect. It is important in this time to really not engange, maybe ask once for an adult conversation, and if it's not coming, go into silence, cry as much as long as needed, but accept that you fell in love with someone they are not. If you are borderline like me, learn to know your emotional patterns and follow through, but without begging them to help you with your feelings. I tried and it made everything worse. Be gentle to yourself and accept the fact, you also allowed this to happen. It's a cruel reality but blaming them solely for misleading you is not gonna help. It will raise the chances next time you do it again, thinking someone else will take care of you better. No. We have to take care of our big hearts, don't ever give that power to anyone else and test them up and down left and right before you fall madly in love with someone.
Oh Rebecca you are brilliant, i do get moments when I feel sad and this person has damaged me, changed who I was. I am just a normal person making my way along this journey of life, I am not a psychologist or mental therapist in any way, I was never trained to deal with such a person. The scar is deep and every day its less sore but i think it's never going to heal fully , keep up the good work and thank god for your knowledge your sharing
If you are so sick of the drama, trauma, and chaos- and want real powerful strategies for success - I’ve got the answer for you - sign up for our free webinar and start your transformative journey- this is the day your life changes! Woohoo! www.icanslay.com 🌀✨
Redefine the way you view challenges in high-conflict negotiations. Our training will show you how to turn trials into triumphs. Learn more highconflictcert.com/ 🚀
I've been thru the discard phase 7 times now but I not think SHE wanted me to suffer.. I think SHE was pushing and hoping I was the one. Leave me with my hopes during this bs with my narc. We will be separated soon.
Rebecca I have been subscribed and learning from your videos you post on your channel for a while but I was so ready for this video and truly believed that I’ve beaten my narc because I’ve stood my ground and not showing him signs of me giving in to his little tricks so I’d like to thankyou for giving me the education I needed because I truly felt so lost for way too long ❤️
hi Rebecca.......from the uk......53 year old male.........i am struggling.....33 year relationship/marriage.......the last 3 years .......now the plus years prior, which guessing you can relate as the digging started...........ive searched watched so-many youtube videos......on this topic......and yeah tick all boxes.......but honestly my once life out-trumps 'em all..........proper need to talk.......❤
If you are so sick of the drama, trauma, and chaos- and want real powerful strategies for success - I’ve got the answer for you - sign up for our free webinar and start your transformative journey- this is the day your life changes! Woohoo! www.icanslay.com 🌀✨
My narcissist tried to contact me three times via text. I have not and will not ever respond to this person. It sure is nice to see him totally confused. I love it it.
📌Do you want to learn more about defeating the narcissist in any setting? Join my free webinar in www.slayyournegotiation.com/rzwebinar. 🙌💪
See you there!
How are you doing today. Rebecca. And. Im. Doing good too. ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
👍👍👍
Rebecca. Wood you. Want me too. Be. Your. Husband Charles wade Linn jr. Then. Hun ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
Pp I need help I'm trying to divorce my wife she's a doctor but she's a narcissist and I've been in jail for stalking and 20 other felony charges and I didn't need convicted or nothing but a misdemeanor because she's a liar and I have proof I need a lawyer and I need help I'm by myself she done exactly what you say she do
The best revenge for narcissistic,is to live your life well..
And not even thinking about them, anymore, at all
That was almost exactly what I said to myself the other day. I said I want to be happy and thrive, and I want her to know it.
@@rshnewton who cares if they know it. They will keep their eye on you. My ex used her flying monkeys after she left. I ended up getting married and having kids with someone else and just like I expected, she called a few years later.. furious
Yes, they like and enjoy to see people looking and behaving in a negative way. Its food and drink to them. They , like to see a person looking like they feel.
The only manner for the narcissism respects you, it's leaves out from their lifes
Getting better:
1. You’re educating yourself and figuring it out
2. Getting help
3. You’re not longer feeling as triggered by the narc, you are observing their behaviour
4. You see how weak and insecure they are
5. You experience no more fear when dealing with the narc
x
I can seeeeeeee now
You’re the real mvp!
Aha
@@melarmitage8390 Spam!
Starting to feel that way after 6 years!!! Yay!!!
When you can look back on all the trauma they caused and view it as personal growth and know in your soul it’s made you a better person you’ve healed 👏
just random, l like your name
respect from South east 🇬🇧
@@royferguson3909 thanks Roy. And yours is a fine name as well. 🏴 🙏
Yes Andrew they actually did us a favor causing us to grow while they will always live in a dark black hole
@@joshuaanzalone2060 they exist in perpetual misery whereby there actions eventually repel the very supply they crave. The definition of madness.
🎯👤❤️🔥
I JUST WON MY NEGOTIATION!!! Love to you all, maintain your self worth, you are truly valuable and can be understood in this situation and find help.
CONGRATULATIONS !!!!!
WE ARE SO HAPPY FOR YOU!!!!
🎉Congratulations🎊!!! I won mine over a month ago. I feel so relieved. Now have gone NO CONTACT.
Congratulations, Queen. 👑 It sounds like you SLAYed. 🗡️
So happy for you!!! 👊👊👊
CONGRATS and woohooo to you!! Staying the course is the hardest so thx for sharing! 🤘🏽💥😼
It's not you. You're not crazy. They are. The moment you realise that, you're winning.
It's Time to Break Free for Good...Let's Do This! Sign up for our free webinar and start your transformative journey- slay.rebeccazung.com/outsmart-narc 💪
YES, EVER SINCE I WAS 12 YEAR OLD KID, I KNEW, IF THINGS DONE DELIBERATELY / ON PURPOSELY WRONG & CONTINIEING IT, THAT IS IRREGULAR - NONE SENSE & DOWN TO EARTH STUPID / CRAZY!! I MAKE ONCE A WHILE MISTAKENLY WRONG THINGS TOO. BUT I TRY TO RACTIFY THEM / FIX THEM! AS MOST OF US DO TOO! THANK YOU REBECCA ZUNG! YOU'VE HELPED ME, MANY VARIOUS DIFFERENT TIMES, WITHIN THISPAST 1 1/2 YEAR. MANY THANKS. + HAVE A SUCCESSFUL NICE DAY!
Narcs always go after successful ppl, ppl with money, ppl from good families, attractive with high self esteems, ppl doing well in life, ppl that are very confident and self assured just so they can break you and make you weak, codependent, insecure, doing things solely for their approval and needy for them only to break you. Tear you apart. Take you from that high point you were at when you met them to a low point where u don’t even recognize yourself anymore because you’re such a different person from the person you once were because that’s exactly what they feed off of💯
I feel like my ex-narc would click on these videos thinking they're the victim for devaluing and discarding me and watch these videos for validation about how shitty I was but when they run into the comment section and see a comment like yours, they immediately click off because they then realize THEY'RE the narc. After 6 years from the initial discard, I'm finally gaining some sustenance life force back!
Not always.sometimes they go to the nieve ones.most of the time they are financially challenged.
Absolutely spot on
💯 truth!
So much on point,I realised after 20 years,I don’t know who I am now,it’s so ditto 😢
Powerful!! He chose me because I HAVE VALUE!!
Same here.with what I thought was a nice girl.robot I say!
Yes, but unfortunately he then spends every day working to diminish, to destroy your value!
@@artistelaine1061 you mean I'm not the super hero I thought I was.who would want that impossible job.im stealth Rider,night hawk,pick out a name.i can save all of you.see my finger,....I have two.four if you're drunk.im fine just being me.wanna play!?😜🤗😱😎👍💪😬🦇🕷️🕸️👽👼👹👼👹👼👹 Trying to make you laugh.try it.works for me.
Lynyl Cullen,You are beautiful 🌷,hope you are not with a narcissist 😈!
This totally explains why he tried so hard to insert himself with my time and life in the beginning of meeting him. I was on my A Game in my career (albeit locally), and he would ask questions about what I was doing professionally at the time. Then when I expressed via text conversation that I was looking to go to another city to study my craft further, he called me right there and then and told me “locally, you’re you. There: you’re not special”. Well, eff that! He’s not in my life anymore and I’m in the process of leveling up.
Rebecca, I so admire your "Never give in. Never give up." attitude. I too will not stop the fight of resisting these ugly monsters, of revealing them to the world, and taking back control over my own identity, my life and my self worth.
Finally, I am done with the covert narcissist I’ve been dealing with for the past 3 1/2 years. Just moved out of the house we both lived at. I can’t explain how relieving and freeing it is. Now I continue to heal myself
Congratulations on your move, your bravery and your determination to heal!
Hi Hiptay!
Did you both own the house?
Ditto’ 😇🧚♀️😇
You're so lucky, I want to be at that parting stage too
Same here 3.5 years
I didn’t realize my ex was a narcissist or at least had narcissistic traits until after I broke up with him. I felt liberated, but I’m still a little angry. However, I won’t let him steal my glory and self worth.
When you forgive the ones who hurt you. The pain goes. From experience. God bless you 🙏
How are you doing these days months since?
Same! Didn't realize what was going on until he discarded me! It's always a relief to know the truth.
That’s a warrior doing videos to make people lives better
"The best revenge is to be unlike him who performed the injury."
- Marcus Aurelius
Love his philosophy. It's because of him I realized I've been married to a narc for 25 years
@blackbetty8799 Agreed. The fact that his philosophy has stood the test of time is reason enough to read "meditations".
@divatamer194 I'm deep in that book and lessons. It's magical and brings clarity some may never get.
3:52 2. They wanted you to feel isolated.
When my toxic ex-coworker said to me something like "Everyone thinks so," I said to him "I really understand everyone thinks so, but I'm going to do what I want. It's my own thing." That was okay.
I've been with a narcissist for over 22 years and right now I'm planning for my own future and while I am still dealing with him I realize now how insecure he is.
Ha ha good for you! Yes! I had a similar victory when stuck still living with my soon-to-be-ex when I began my divorce right before Covid hit (causing eviction moratoriums so I couldn’t find rental housing to move into 🤦🏼♀️and our courts closed so we couldn’t finish the divorce process🤦🏼♀️🤦🏼♀️) He’d TELL me what he demanded I do and I politely listened and replied even-toned: ‘I understand that’s what you want to have me do, but I disagree so I’m going to do what I want to do instead’ and walked away. Boy, was he left flat-footed! Also, he’d rage over me ‘telling’ someone an awful thing he’d done (i.e., I was no longer keeping his toxic nature behind closed doors but revealing it to the world and tearing back the walls of my isolation) and that person had been upset with him and he turned around and BLAMED ME. It was all my fault that person was upset with him 🙄I looked him square in the eye and said: my TELLING what you did is NOT the BAD THING. YOU DOING the bad thing, that’s what they are upset about.
My covert narcissistic neighbour loves to tell me that everyone hates me. If she says it again I'm going to say calmly "Margaret, that's fine with me. I don't hate them. Just because I think they're c**ts doesn't mean that I hate them" and smile sweetly. It's obvious that her worst nightmare is to feel hated. She has no idea that I'm cool with being hated. Understanding how they think is really helpful. I've just got to get better at keeping my cool although it is extremely hot today!
@@sarahwagland1559 Sure. They are scared of being hated.
That’s their fav line! “Everyone thinks so!” 🤣 Everyone is them and their scared toxic hand full of people who know who they truly are. Omg I heard this so much. Lol Not everyone because not my true people. They want you to think that. Idc tho. I know who I am! I know who he is. All I need to know. They have no true “everyone” friends or etc. just supply. 👍
Never give up and never give in. Thank you Rebecca 😊
You got this! 💪
I am disgusted by this narcissistic behaviour ! 💙 2:59
I dealt with the worst kind of narcissistic. After a year of weekly counseling I have come back stronger. I swept him under the rug. Making friends. Doing all the things I love. Rarely think of him. Learned to love myself & I am worthy of happiness & peace.
just Go no contact and Live! my brother only SMILED & smirked when he broke my Heart! a 100% Evil MAN.
Sounds like my brother. They're pathetic, aren't they. I feel sorry for him.
My sister...😢
My mom hated it when I would read books! All of my books were self-help. I remember her yelling at me one day for not doing something that she never asked me to do and when I brought up that fact she said, “All you do is read your damn spiritual books!” I was like, “The Bible!!??” I was reading more than the Bible, but she didn’t like that I started to give my time and energy to myself and my daughter. I’m 40, and moved back in with my parents after several failed relationships. I kept attracting narcissist. I realized it was my conditioned behavior (their parenting) from childhood that kept opening the door to be taken advantage of. I am healing from this.
I just came to this conclusion about myself
It’s time to fix me really
@@MsBrown7777 You can get better! It’s going to be an uphill battle, but worth it. I wrote the above post over a year ago, and my life is completely turned around. Therapy works ❤️ I’ve been no contact for that year with most of my family and my mental health is so much better for it.
I absolutely believe it! Per God, "you will see the goodness of God in the land of the living."
Just one thing is needed. I haven't signed on that line. Happy to get out of everyone's hair when there is a tiny bit of restoration of what I co-built, co-established and co-earned/grew, as well as privacy and situational freedom. I'm so simple that way. I need groceries and I have some people to take care of and help protect (per Scripture).
Ultimate justice is illusive this side of heaven-I'm not going to get those 16 critical years (ravaged by a syndicated defamation/cancellation/long-term campaign) back: career, finances, vacations with kids, dignity stolen, creative side-hustles, but a little measure of it should encourage everyone, especially Christians.
I have a daughter… I am 76, she is 53… I have been dealing with her narcissistic behavior since she was about 20-21. We have been estranged and then reconnected then estranged again. I never understood what was affecting our relationship. Now I see clearly what I am up against. I recently just told her “I am finished”. I hung up on her ranting. I also have twin boys who are 14 months younger and her…. Her relationship with them has been the same as mine but maybe not as severe because they were not as “understanding “. I felt ( I raised them as a single parent with no contact with their father until they were adults) I needed to be the “constant” empathized, caring, loving person. Oh, how wrong I’ve been. I hope it’s not too late but I am at peace now and that feels amazing!!! Thanks for the videos!!!
Thank you. It is really assuring that I am on the right track. Your comment on the narcs getting worse just before they give up is very encouraging to know.
And boy is it the TRUTH. I am so glad I finally made it past that point. Good lord, these people are parasites on the ass of humanity!
Proud of you! You got this ❤
I've been free of my gaslighter since February and I've had some time for self reflection. I was about to cut ties with my gaslighterafter a 10+ year friendship but those ties were cut for me. She died. It wasn't easy coming to the realization I had to come to but it helped when I was able to acknowledge it. Even though it wasn't easy to deal with her, what I needed to do came easier and I'm able to go to sleep at night with a sense of peace instead of what others have to go to sleep with. I wish more people could go to sleep with the same sense of peace after terrible things they've had to endure. The biggest thing that helped me was aquiring knowledge like what comes from videos like this and other sources on the subject. Way more valuable than any fighting training I've had. It helped to know exactly what I was dealing with and made things like being gaslit easier to endure. Thanks Rebecca for what you share here. You do make a difference.
Just came across you and this video, started educating myself after 1,5 of no contact with my narc who made my life a living HELL. Thank you, amazing content!
Thank you for educating me. There's day I feel I no longer can deal with him. I'm very isolated.
Just do it🙏
STAY WITH THIS EDUCATION !!!
NO CONTACT WITH THE NARC!!!❤️
You got this! 💪
When my ex gave me the "everybody else" says so, I asked for names. After he stuttered for a while, he finally came up with two of his friends names. I replied with,
"I should have said, idiots. Give me names of someone who ascribes (too big a word for him) who is not an Idiot." That eliminated "everybody else." They all knew he was spewing lies. "A good name is better than silver or gold."
In oct 1987 at age 33 dad passed away, I went to funeral home, the Narcissist ex started grilping about everything, i got out of car on highway , never made it to dads resting place, did not want to take the scene to buriel, every one wondered where i was.
Push and push , 9 times swore i hit her, bounced 13 checks in one week, $300 each plus $35 for each check.
I filed for devorce paid $10,000 over 3 years.
Never got to see kids, $503 for kids thru department of justice.
Slandered , and strip of all rights.
Then one day after work daughter let her mom into my bathtub.
Did not know all about Narcisst, but I had so much anger in me i had to be alone.
Flying monkeys hoovering lost my trust.
Policy was do not cast your shadow on my driveway.
I would tell you i dealt with my anger for a good twenty years.
I believe only God had a right to take life, that saved me and all the narrsist i have met.
This gal is spot on as accurate down to a science.
Adult children of alcoholics , I read that back in 1980 it was spot on in every disfunctional family. 1st child born same Characteristic in each family 1 thru 5 th child same.
Scape goat, caretaker, and other .
All are mental conditions , and most from abuse,
Rape, mental abuse, a child not being afforded the right to mental mature in a healthy enviroment.
Forgive. But donot feel you have to be a door mate to anyone.
Rebecca is so accurate on this. My patients and staff keep telling me my wife was a narcissist I didn’t know what that was. I just thought she had some mental issues or going through the change. I have broken her and we are getting divorced now but I always thought it was me. She is just another person and she doesn’t trigger me at all. Thanks so much for the great video’s and education!!
You are on point!!… I’ve only gotten stronger and now I help a lot of my friends who are with Narcissist. It’s sad to see them being abused…. Plus I’m learning more about myself which is the most important part
If you are so sick of the drama, trauma, and chaos- and want real powerful strategies for success - I’ve got the answer for you - sign up for our free webinar and start your transformative journey- this is the day your life changes! Woohoo! www.icanslay.com 🌀✨
I am definitely looking through a different lens as I’m living myself more… and don’t get triggered as fast or often anymore… so thank you girl the beaming confirmation! But still hurt about the situation I’m in… as I want out… so trying to educate myself on my rights, a plan… so hard when everything costs … to get help you need .
By watching and similar videos from others I did not realize I had already defeater the narcissist. Thank you thank you! I will never be able to thank you enough
Johnny Depp should listen to you as he goes through this defamation case against a narcissist.
He’s not all innocent
@@laurieannJake at least he took ownership of his wrongs unlike Amber 💩. That’s one of the differences of a narcissist and not one.
If she didn’t like him she should have just left.
I'm on stage 4.8! Almost! It's been almost 6 months. The recent AH case really brought back some memories. Thank you for sharing all the useful information with us. It's been so helpful for my healing and defeating process.
I never knew my ex husband was a narcissist..i saw 2 different people ....
Is it possible to negotiate with narcissists and not feel like you're losing your power? Introducing....OUTSMART A NARCISSIST A 4-STEP PROVEN PLAN To Take Your Power Back! Learn more >> slay.rebeccazung.com/outsmart-narc✨
This is so encouraging to keep growing with knowledge. Thank you for dedicating your time to this. It needs to be a movement since it can’t be seen. 👍🏼👍🏼👍🏼
Theses information videos are literally saving peoples lives
You got this! ❤ Join me in my free webinar- www.icanslay.com
This information broke my heart. It reminded me of my childhood when I was treated like this... oh, my... I wish I hadn't learned their lessons so well because I became like them. Now to undo the past and learn anew. This must be why we "marry our parents"... we think that kind of behavior is "normal" and it's familiar, whereas real closeness is scary because the parents were not safe, so we see potential danger in all relationships. Thank you, Rebecca.
My only child stopped talking to me about a year ago. I miss my grandkids, but I do not miss the non - stop angry gaslighting. I'm going to be ok, thanks to videos like this!
You're so right, great show!
You got this! ❤ Join me in my free webinar- www.icanslay.com
Yup that's true 👍. No reaction is the best way of reacting to them. Self-control is what people need in order to defeat these bitter people. You have to control your emotions in order not to give any reaction. Narcissist respect empath highly intuitive, with strong character, disciplined, wise, discerned person. Narcissist are not wise because their insecurity is in them, they have no worth in themselves. Narcissist are bullies if you think about it, they're all pathetic.
Im just so happy I get to be here with all you awesome people...let's spread the love one person at a time.😊
I think I realised that I finally defeated my ex narc when he said he could have any women he wanted, and I told him to not let the door hit him in the a** on the way out! He looked like such a wounded child! Of course, then the phoney tears and apologies insued, but by then I was just over his nonsense and constant devaluing of me. Narc free over a year now, and I'm educating myself and finally LIVING!!! 🙂
I wish you could do a series on workplace narcissists like bosses or workmates
Yes.. why isn't their videos on this topic in the workplace 🤦🏻♀️ I've been in a smear campaign from a narcissist manager for the past 6 months and it's been hard
I’m still waiting on one about narcissistic neighbors from HELL
@@ThatoneLisa I hear you Lisa had a few of those in my time. Luckily I was able to move to the country and now just have horses and cows for neighbours. Hopefully you can change your situation
Thank you soooo much.... You are such a blessing...and those supporting each other and the sponsors of your videos... Thank you all for being such a massive strength to everyone.. 🙏❤️
Glad I could help. You got this! ❤
I've come across lot's of UA-cam material on the subject. But this practical analysis and encouragement here is bar none the best and most useful. I barely ever comment on UA-cam but this lady knows and it clearly comes from profound experience. Really really good strategies! So helpful. My clarity and focus have enhanced 100%
JUST DO It! And I AM!
Now...I thoroughly understand their behavior, I don't feel triggered and I'm no more afraid of them....now I can deal with them....by the I have two narcissists in my life...my husband's mother and his sister....suffered silently for 24 long year...previously couldn't understand them...totally confused...depressed....so scared of them...theses videos and the understanding I'm getting...they giving my life back....
I don't know how to thank you...God bless you for helping people in distress...
I think I was in shock addiction. I mean they are so shocking in the way act and treat people. They have no self. It's weird!
That's right. It's what, but not who, you are dealing with. Narcs are not persons in the way we usually think of them. As soon as you depersonalize it, you start to understand it's a thing not a person. Also, it will go on and find new supply within minutes of your going no contact or setting boundaries up for which you demand respect. They're not worth a second of your pity.
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Evil is all they know!
I’m loving your energy and enthusiasm Mrs Zung! These people are very predictable after learning about them. Thank you!!! 🙏🏼
I already walked away forever. I will never see or talk to this person that’s done this to me for 34 years and then they told on themselves to me. I was stupid about it and had to educate myself but now my eyes are open.
Thank you for your help with clarity and discernment in recognizing and dealing with the narcissistic
I'm glad to be helping!
Through my darkest hours when i dont have someone to talk about my Problem its a God sent your videos pop up on this tube and i started to fallow your advice I'm already winning. Thank you so much for your help
Yes. Now I educate myself and I feel validated. My healing process has begun. I’m glad 🙂
Proud of you! You got this ❤
My covert narcissistic neighbour just accused me of throwing dog poo in her hedge. I kept repeating that she is in control (they are preventing us from selling our house - long story). All our neighbours need to do is cooperate to solve the problem but they are getting off on having control over our lives. I get better at dealing with them and calling them out but I still find it hard not to shout. The lies they spew and their twisting of the truth is so frustrating. Her husband told my husband that I should be locked up. I told him he is spineless and is controlled by his wife. He made a lunge at me and I said it's your wife who you really want to slap, not me. I understand the dynamics so much better but need to work on keeping detached. It's so difficult!
I know this now !!! I’m trying to forget about him . Of course I can’t not 100% but I’m start educating right now . Taking class and go to gym and work hard . I’m doing so well now . Much much less stress out . And feeling good . He is trying to call me but I’m not call back . And he know when he supposed to call me if he really want to talk to me . But he is just checking call . Like he want me to call him seems like it . But I’m not call him . I’m just start happy by myself . Thank you Dr Zung 🙏😊❤️
If you are so sick of the drama, trauma, and chaos- and want real powerful strategies for success - I’ve got the answer for you - sign up for our free webinar and start your transformative journey- this is the day your life changes!>>slay.rebeccazung.com/outsmart-narc ✨
I'm not sure how you are so accurate, but WOW. I am currently in no contact and healing from a narcissistic ex
12 years I been dealing with a narracissist. But you know the truth of the matter, i don't even blame them because I saw the signs early on and I continue to stay there because I fell in LOVE, and I realize that it was a tool for them to feed on to give a false sense of love, and they fed on that in their ability to control and manipulate me. real love is NOT in them. They use that emotion only to get what they want and need. So if they say they love you it's not real. It's a ploy to give you just a little hope to keep you in their selfish life.
Wow. No truer words have been spoken...or written. That's what I was experiencing in my relationship with her. I kept telling myself to get out before it gets worse, or be discarded and be the villian. I didnt listen...guess what?? I stuck around for 18 months, and I went from hero to villian with a broken heart while she moved onto to her ex boyfriend for new supply. Just evil. Little does she know...once I heal, I'll be even stronger and her games will have NO effect on me. Then we'll see who's crying....
I need you to understand that I lived with one for many years, and I am here now! Do not underestimate me!
IF I MAY COMPLIMENT YOU & THANK YO ALSO REBECCA? = OF ALL THE PSYCHOLOGISTS - PSICHIATRISTS AND LAW EXPLAINERS? IT IS YOU REBECCA ZUNG. YOU GAVE ME MOST OF THE BEST POINTERS, WHAT TO - HOW TO & WHY / WHY NOTS?! ' ' - THANK YOU VERY MUCH! ' ' MUCH APPRECIATED THEM! - 🌺 -
I work with one and he is the most horrible person I have ever met. I recognized that he was childish, envious, and a liar, and I had heard the term narcissist before but I had never had to deal with one. So when I started realizing he was psycho, I limited my contact with him even though it was difficult working at a small company and being one of three in my department. So I began to ignore him and just keep walking when he would speak to me and I thought he would get bored and eventually leave me alone. But that just caused him to double down until his behavior became just absolutely ridiculous. I would come near him and he would start hitting and kicking things and just make alot of noise. So one day this senior citizen, this adult man, pulled a chair out from under me as I went to sit down so I proceeded to curse him out. It felt good and everyone was there so noe he is not allowed to speak to me nor I him but I'm good with that. I was ignoring him without being told to for at least 6 months before that anyway. This guy doesn't know how many grandchildren he has nor their names because his kids haven't spoken to him in many years. My children and I are very close and he hates that I know.
My fave ‘I beat him’ moment was when negotiating over splitting assets. I researched all the values, came to the negotiating table with that info in-hand. But know-it-all (who’d done no research had no proof for anything he claimed) wanted to be in charge. So I’d name an asset and ask him what he thought it was worth. If he named a figure much higher than my research proved, I simply agreed with him, split it in 1/2 and moved down the list (he never asked for my value bc it inflated his ego that I thought he was right 🤣) if he named a value way too low, I brought out my research (which he knew I could present to court) so because I had documented proof he’d accept it and likewise quickly move on so as not to dwell on any possibility he’d been mistaken. He NEVER caught on! My second fave ‘I beat him’ moment was when we were separated and he’d try to hoover me into his drama and control with REPEATED demands via email. At first, still in trauma-bond-mode, I’d reply ASAP impotently defending my boundaries since I’d already said ‘no’ yet he wasn’t accepting ‘no’ and I reverted to ‘over explaining’ mode. But then it hit me: once I’d said ‘no’ I actually had nothing further to say. EVER. No matter WHAT he said or did. Further, I also came to realize that just bc he’d emailed me that didn’t mean I HAD TO read it or respond in any time frame that HE dictated/demanded. I LET MY FEAR GO. And went and did any number of things that were rebuilding my life and creating greater separation from him. I realized that if I did ‘x’ he could rage. If I did ‘y’ he could rage. And, frankly, if I did absolutely f-ing nothing he could STILL rage. Nothing I did or didn’t do stopped him bc he alone chose the toxic path he took. (Like Capt Speirs in Band of Brothers, I became FEARLESS accepting that whatever happened wasn’t in my control)❤️I wish everyone reading this that same fearlessness and POWER 👊🏼
Not that you need an atta girl from me but here it is. I'm practicing some of the same things you mentioned. (With other people in my life) I'm triggered when people try to control me. I don't react though, Pause say a prayer and say or do what I feel is appropriate and sometimes that consists of absolutely freak'n nothing. God bless you and your healing journey.
Thank you, Rebecca, for all you do for all of us!! I recently moved to my own place after renting a room from a covert narc for 18 months. Am letting all on this podcast know that it will take a while to settle down into feeling normal again. At least, that's my experience so far. Am happy that there are lots of people that I love and receive their love and support in return.
A third roommate moved in 7 months ago and it has just dawned on me that she is also a narc!! My research tells me that they attract each other. Yuk Yuk Narc Narc!! I briefly met the woman who rented my old room and my immediate impression is that she is an Overt Narc! What a wild and strange world.
Hope these comments may help others. The second Covert was more passive-aggressive and lied more than the first Covert, but got fooled because she was always talking about how much she didn't like #1 at all and what a narc #1 was. Am slowly recovering and happy that I have done so much inner work and therapy many years ago.
Have also been sober for 36 years due to the miracles in Alcoholics Anonymous. Highly suggest Al-Anon for anyone whose narc has addictions. And if anyone here has a problem with alcohol or other drugs, please go to AA. You will find tons of support for anything you are dealing with in these 2 wonderful organizations!! I promise. Love and support to all, Jo
P
Helped me immensely. I'm only on my 6th day of no contact. Your comment helps prepare me for the fact years will be involved here. Just thankyou. Northern California, 2 days after Thanksgiving 2022
@@jeffwhisman7990 Oh, Jeff, so happy to hear from you and that my comment helped! I don't think it will take years. I recently bought a meditation-type book for a male friend. There were so many positive things in it so that he can realize how wonderful he is and build self-esteem. Something like this will also be helpful for you, I believe. Keep up the good work and I hope you will find happy, healthy friends! 😬😬 Jo
It's Time to Break Free for Good...Let's Do This! Sign up for our free webinar and start your transformative journey- slay.rebeccazung.com/outsmart-narc 💪
Rebecca Zung … helping to rid the planet of narcissists. 👍
IT SHOWS VERY WELL, THAT REBECCA ZUNG IS, AMMONG LOTS OF PEOPLE, DOES HAV VARIOUS DIFFERENT GOOD EDUCATION, SHE USES IT FOR THE GOOD OF I A - AND SHARES IT WITH US. SUMMING ALL THINGS, EDUCATION AND THE USE OF IT CAN BE, & IS AVERY DANGEROUS DEFENSIVE AS WELL AS OFENSIVE HEAPON!
IT'S EASY TO SAY, BUT SOON AS SOME ONE / /ONE OF US RECOGNIZE A NARCISSIT, GIVE THEM THE COLD SHOULDER??!1 I DID, THEY - IN PLURAL, THEY STARTED TO MAKE ARIOT / BRAWE / FIGHT AGAINST ME! I MEAN 5 OF THERM! I SIMPLY DIDN'T ANSWER!AS IF THEY WERE N O T T H E R E A T A L !FOR ABOUT 7 MINUTES?!! AND THEY HAD NOTHING - NOTHING AT ALL, TO GO ON!! THEY CHOKED ONTHEIT OWN ARROGANCE ANDATTACKS!
I totally love the logic & wisdom in the 4 Agreements! Totally applicable in all instances too. For example, when the families of Jeffrey Dahmer's victims were screaming at him in the courtroom, after he was found guilty of raping and eating them, they should have remembered Agreement: 2. "DON’T TAKE ANYTHING PERSONALLY. Nothing others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won’t be the victim of needless suffering." I must ask, can one REALLY/TRULY be immune to the actions of others, even if those actions are exceptionally sick and brutal crimes? Obviously, people have to grieve, move on, & forgive (if possible), but as a society, I will claim that we should never accept evil or atrocity, committed by others or ourselves, but should emphatically condemn these acts, lest we become desensitized to our own selfish demise. It is no mystery why Narcissism is a major and growing problem in our society. We are trending ever more in the direction of pleasing and gratifying ourselves at the expense of, and without regard to others. If we don't take moral and ethical responsibility, it will get worse, with more families and relationships torn apart. And that is where the "Needless Suffering" comes forth.
🎯 actually really easy to beat them because like you said - their so,so insecure + when you go forth & living your best life possible and don’t look back & believe me - they are checking in on you. They go from smirk, quiet, gaslight stage & then avoiding you … that’s when they know - that you know … it’s a done deal !
You are so very good in providing best advice when we need it. Going to Court next week and better prepared due to YOU. Thank you for being here for all of us dealing with these mean controlling bullies in our lives.🙏
I have a parent that is a narcissist and need to make a decision about not allowing him to totally sink the family assets
Giving you encouragement... narcs are liars, exploiters and thieves. No boundaries or conscience means theft. Speaking as one who was ruined by a narc, I say act now. You cannot help the narc, but the narc will always hurt you and your family. There is nothing to save but yourself and those you truly love.
Hi rebecca, i lost everything, house , car, family, you name it.
Keep it up !!!
Love from portugal 🇵🇹🇵🇹🇵🇹👍🙏🇪🇺
Rebecca Zung thank you so much. really appreciate your help in living my best life. Some of your teaching go back over 30 years.you have given me understanding of the our Father Suside. Powerless and alone are victims of this mhi.living his same life not knowing fully what happen till these exact same people in my life did it to me. There has been so many covert narcissist in my life trying to get at me just like this JD trial. Raised by one devorsed one married to one right now. This has cost my Daughter 22 years. Of being with her father. God Bless You Rebecca Happy Father's Days
Amen Rebecca! I literally could not have gotten through this without you.
Proud of you! You got this ❤
That's where I'm at. I can't get fooled, and now I know it has nothing to do we me❤
Thank you Rebecca! I have been dealing with a narcissist brother. I never thought he was till after our mom died. He isn’t who I thought he was. He is suing me for my inheritance that our mom wanted me to have. It’s been going on since she died 2018. He is such a liar. I know he is weak! Waiting to go to court. I have paperwork what my mom wanted me to have he is making up lies” and trying to get around what the paperwork actually says. I’m not giving in to him I am fighting him to the end.
It’s never going to fly in court
They will laugh him right out
Ignoring the red flags, and not admitting these things exist is truly not reality. You can't fix a cheater, a psychopath, or a narcissist, it's as simple as you can't take blood from stone. these smart phone devices in people's hands have taken them away from real individuality, not until I got closure on my husband I was in the dark. We create our reality and the consciousness of the planet is accelerating. This means people have to become more aware of who they are. When one experiences abuse, you first become aware of the abuse, then realizing you are a victim, With healing and processing comes strong boundaries built by confidence in your worth.
After this comes a realization that the experience made you stronger and more of who you are and that the narcissist was simply a vehicle for your growth. Ultimately you then realize we are all a creation of our energetic spiritual energy and the narcissist was and is a part of us. In the end, we become accepting of the experience and knowing we would never go back to the previous unawakened and unenlightened version of ourselves. It is not by any means an easy journey and is filled with pain especially when we incarnate into a family with a parent of such characteristics. There is a plan and it is ultimately to drive us. You would love an awakened version of you.
My husband was a deceptive narcissist and sociopath, he would never apologize, I was always made to feel little on the inside, it was pure psychological warfare at its lowest, I suspected infidelity on his path, not until with the help of the developer of an app code name rat9 for accessing his device without having to physically touch it, with a functionality to view deleted chats and messages as well as call logs and in-app chats, I was completely in the dark. There was a Conversation I read on his Instagram Account where he did address me as 'beauty with no brains'. I'm finally going through a divorce with evidences too overwhelming. His device contained secrets that I could never have imagined. If in need of such help, write directly to the developer on email ' ethandavydova at gmail dot com '.
It's Time to Break Free for Good...Let's Do This! Sign up for our free webinar and start your transformative journey- slay.rebeccazung.com/outsmart-narc 💪
Thank you for the 5 way on you might already have escaped the narcissist. My wife is a narcissist. I am married since 15 years. I found out 3 month ago. Since then I worked on escape strategies. Although I still have a tendency to fall in for her behavior, I can adjust in a short time. The main knowledge was, not to explain or justify or blame anything on her. Just be honest (except money issues) and treat her like a stranger. Sort of an alien with special properties. 🤭😋🥰
Hi, another great show, thanks for sharing!
Check this out!! Redefine the way you view challenges in high-conflict negotiations. Our training will show you how to turn trials into triumphs >> highconflictcert.com/ 💪🚀
I broke a 6mo relationship with a narcisist, 4 months were awesome last 2 hell, I couldn't have a normal conversation because as I was told am not that intelligent, couldn't comment on the news because there were depressing! Per him I couldn't drive or fix anything, totally untrue
Am a very successful woman, who volunteers on a charity that does construction, I can tile a whole home am great with a hammer.
He totally wanted me to depend on him!
I finally and calmly said, I know who I am and above all what am not. And walked away.
He is on depression meds is a recovering alcoholic, did not know that till 4 months into.
Am back being a happy lady surrounded by loving family and friends..sadly he has no kids no connection with his siblings.
Thank you
Interesting tips. Thank you for sharing
Rebecca truly you are a guiding force of strength and calm for me. Much gratitude
I have the book you recommended, huge help, same as the book Mastery of Self. I defeated narcissist after 34 years of hell.
Thank you! This makes me feel better. You helped me so much, I am a valuable person, that's why they picked me. I have educated myself self about them. I still get a little triggered, but not as much. I beat them and they are pathetic .
Check this out!! Redefine the way you view challenges in high-conflict negotiations. Our training will show you how to turn trials into triumphs >> highconflictcert.com/ 💪🚀
Immensely positive & validating. TY, RZ
You are so so right he says everybody else thinks I’m fucking great everybody else thinks I’m wonderful and I’m like yeah that’s cause you’re fake with them your real side comes out on me God you guys know so much
Fantastic. Thank you- from Brazil
By following my 4 Step plan, you can win when dealing with narcissism! Learn more >> slay.rebeccazung.com/outsmart-narc 🌟
Thanks for your words of wisdom.
Proud of you! You got this ❤
Yep
I defeated the narcissist I was married
to for over 40 years,
He killed himself
Right in front of me
He didn't want to live without me
So yeah I defeated him
But I don't feel good or right
about
Narcissist need so much to
thrive in any capacity they have
the ability to
They need a lot of love
They are sad human beings
Great video. Great communication. I needed a perspective change. Thanks.
Thank you..hope you could join me in my FREE webinar 😊
>>> www.rebeccazung.com/cert-workshop
Thank you Rebecca. I HAVE FIGURED IT OUT, ITS A GRADUAL THING BUT YOU HAVE Encourage ME EVEN MORE.
Proud of you! You got this ❤
Yes Rebecca 💕it’s a reflection of themselves and now I can see a very clear picture 👌 I stay strong in my truth 🙏❤️
Check this out!! Redefine the way you view challenges in high-conflict negotiations. Our training will show you how to turn trials into triumphs >> highconflictcert.com/ 💪🚀
Education...... check
UA-cam conmunity....... check
Lost feelings for em......check
What fear..... check.
Hoestly thanks for beautiful ppl like you
Rebecca, thank you so much for this information. I really needed this encouragement. It's a daily struggle for me in my situation but I'm making progress and you're helping keep me motivated and strong. It really means a lot. Thank you!
I'm glad to be helping! Stay strong over there! 💪
I'd say once it hits you (how repetitive their messages are and how they only talk about themselves) yes you get a cold flash and become unemotional, but then you realize this was all a fantasy and then you crash on the ground for weeks. You start asking, begging, explaining, pleasing and you still don't get an adult interaction you'd expect. It is important in this time to really not engange, maybe ask once for an adult conversation, and if it's not coming, go into silence, cry as much as long as needed, but accept that you fell in love with someone they are not. If you are borderline like me, learn to know your emotional patterns and follow through, but without begging them to help you with your feelings. I tried and it made everything worse. Be gentle to yourself and accept the fact, you also allowed this to happen. It's a cruel reality but blaming them solely for misleading you is not gonna help. It will raise the chances next time you do it again, thinking someone else will take care of you better. No. We have to take care of our big hearts, don't ever give that power to anyone else and test them up and down left and right before you fall madly in love with someone.
Oh Rebecca you are brilliant, i do get moments when I feel sad and this person has damaged me, changed who I was. I am just a normal person making my way along this journey of life, I am not a psychologist or mental therapist in any way, I was never trained to deal with such a person. The scar is deep and every day its less sore but i think it's never going to heal fully , keep up the good work and thank god for your knowledge your sharing
If you are so sick of the drama, trauma, and chaos- and want real powerful strategies for success - I’ve got the answer for you - sign up for our free webinar and start your transformative journey- this is the day your life changes! Woohoo! www.icanslay.com 🌀✨
Thanks girl.
This is encouraging.
And TRUE!?!
To-boot
Redefine the way you view challenges in high-conflict negotiations. Our training will show you how to turn trials into triumphs. Learn more highconflictcert.com/ 🚀
Love you . God bless much love.
Oh! That's easy. Learn their game& play it better.👍😎🙂💪💖⚡!✌️😊
I've been thru the discard phase 7 times now but I not think SHE wanted me to suffer.. I think SHE was pushing and hoping I was the one. Leave me with my hopes during this bs with my narc. We will be separated soon.
Rebecca I have been subscribed and learning from your videos you post on your channel for a while but I was so ready for this video and truly believed that I’ve beaten my narc because I’ve stood my ground and not showing him signs of me giving in to his little tricks so I’d like to thankyou for giving me the education I needed because I truly felt so lost for way too long ❤️
hi Rebecca.......from the uk......53 year old male.........i am struggling.....33 year relationship/marriage.......the last 3 years .......now the plus years prior, which guessing you can relate as the digging started...........ive searched watched so-many youtube videos......on this topic......and yeah tick all boxes.......but honestly my once life out-trumps 'em all..........proper need to talk.......❤
So grateful for this education
You got this! ❤ Join me in my free webinar- www.icanslay.com
Thank you. Your info really helps me
If you are so sick of the drama, trauma, and chaos- and want real powerful strategies for success - I’ve got the answer for you - sign up for our free webinar and start your transformative journey- this is the day your life changes! Woohoo! www.icanslay.com 🌀✨
My narcissist tried to contact me three times via text. I have not and will not ever respond to this person. It sure is nice to see him totally confused. I love it it.
By following my 4 Step plan, you can win when dealing with narcissism! Learn more >> slay.rebeccazung.com/outsmart-narc 🌟