*Olly and Bill when writing sketch* Bill: Do you think anyone will pick up on the fact we're not wearing any NKVD gear? Olly: Nah, I reckon absolutely nobody will will notice that. Our dedicated audience: *Angry breathing noises* Anyway, don't forget to buy your MyHeritage DNA kit here: bit.ly/Squire_MH. Use the coupon code Squire for free shipping. As an added bonus, you can start a 30-day free trial of MyHeritage’s best subscription for family history research - and enjoy a 50% discount if you decide to continue it.
I already did business with Ancestry, and it turns out that I am 20% Scottish and 20% Spanish and 20% Mesoamerican and 20% Irish and tiny percentages of other things. I know that exceeds 100% but I'm rounding the big parts up.
Ah, the sketchy site that definitely wont sell your DNA info to China or other criminals so they can modify their bioweapons to target your family specifically...
''Youre going the wrong way! The finnish line is there! -''i thought the winter war was over'' This is the kind of comedy i want to see used in more places, good job on the pun writing
@@goldenfiberwheat238that's half the joke, peace was made with Finland in 1940 but following operation Barbarossa they reignited the war in order to get their land back from the Soviets.
@@goldenfiberwheat238 The war where the Finns went back to war is called the Continuation War (also known as the Second Soviet-Finnish War), not the Winter War.
And you will seek Me and find Me when you search for Me with all your heart. - Jeremiah 29:13 “For God so loved the world, that He gave His only Son, so that everyone who believes in Him will not perish, but have eternal life. -John 3:16 Repent therefore, and turn back, that your sins may be blotted out. -Acts 3:19 If you’re in North America, please go check out any of the churches available to you: PCA, OPC, Rpcna/Rpc, Urcna, or a canrc church (These are conservative and actual Presbyterian churches) If you can’t find one of the conservative presby churches then, maybe a Lcms Lutheran church. If you are Scottish, I recommend the Free Church of Scotland and the APC. (Different from the Church of Scotland) If you’re English I recommend the Evangelical Presbyterian Church in England & Wales and the Free Church of England . (Different from the Church of England) Also online you can look up church finders for each of the groups, it will show you locations :)
And you will seek Me and find Me when you search for Me with all your heart. - Jeremiah 29:13 “For God so loved the world, that He gave His only Son, so that everyone who believes in Him will not perish, but have eternal life. -John 3:16 Repent therefore, and turn back, that your sins may be blotted out. -Acts 3:19 If you’re in North America, please go check out any of the churches available to you: PCA, OPC, Rpcna/Rpc, Urcna, or a canrc church (These are conservative and actual Presbyterian churches) If you can’t find one of the conservative presby churches then, maybe a Lcms Lutheran church. If you are Scottish, I recommend the Free Church of Scotland and the APC. (Different from the Church of Scotland) If you’re English I recommend the Evangelical Presbyterian Church in England & Wales and the Free Church of England . (Different from the Church of England) Also online you can look up church finders for each of the groups, it will show you locations :)
@@samholdsworth420depends how you measure it. Nobody breaks games while drinking Yorkshire Golden, like Spiff does. He does not do much LARPING though.
I'm waiting for the JunkyardDigs and Square collaboration. Hopefully involving getting an old Churchill tank to start for the first time in 70 years or so.
I thought the best part was during the “get ready, set” start, when he says “set” he waives the pistol AT the men as a little psychological signal. Hilarious.
No you see intestines have a certain special cooling effect on German transmissions - very well known among the Soviet Navy but hadn't yet made its way to the NKVD office due to very literal translations of German documents
I love that maxim machinegunner is named maxim, its refrence to old soviet warsong called "tale of the two maxims'. Chorus goes hard "tak tak tak goes maxim, tak tak tak replies the machinegunner"
@@Eric0225 Modern day Russian army uniforms are green like that. So it was a old man from WWII being conscripted into the modern Russian army to fight in Ukraine. Russian soldiers have the nickname of Little Green Men (Aliens) or more commonly Orcs as a result.
@@SirCabooseCCCP Well, the Little Green Men started during the 2014 invasion when unmarked uniformed Russian soldiers crossed the border along side a Pro Russian militia force, as they darted across Ukraine to occupy Crimea. Since they didn't "officially" exist, they were called Little Green Men because they'd just walk around towns/cities with no markings. Orcs is kind of the post 2022 Nickname after Russia's 2nd invasion of the country. Kind of a moral boost defending Helms Deep and all that. But their Green Uniforms is the catalyst of the nicknames.
@@Alte.Kameradenwell, there is also all the raping, torturing, pillaging and murder, as well as the punishment of your own troops by torture, and the Chechen blocking detachments shooting retreating soldiers having a slight influence on that nickname I would say. Not to mention the deliberate targeting of schools, kindergartens, hospitals, maternity wards, shopping malls and apartment buildings rather than military targets. And the tactics and strategy. And also the country being a totalitarian shithole falling apart and hell to live in as soon as you leave the two major cities.
As a Russian citizen with degree in Soviet history, I suggest you get blue collar (NKVD) cap for portraying barrier troops. Overall great and funny, as usual
I know it's a comedy and they're not loaded, but the way Oliver always waves his guns around and flags everyone continually makes me nervous. 😂 But that's just me picking nits. Love the video, as always.
water-cooled machineguns actually had better rate of fire, the reason they got discontinued is that they can’t be moved that easily, making manouver/encirclements more difficult
I really like how Jingles always plays these "old fella at the front" roles and doesn't seem to ever mind that he's only 26 and maybe getting SLIGHTLY negged by said casting.
Soviet blocking detachments actually did not generally gun down retreating troops. They'd usually stop them and send the officers to a penal battalion and the men back to the front. Sometimes officers would be summarily executed for cowardice but bodies are not an unlimited resource and the Soviets were keenly aware of this in 1942.
@@AudieHolland not really, no, that was a direct quote. From Roberts, Geoffrey (2006). Stalin's Wars: From World War to Cold War, 1939-1953. Yale University Press. p. 132. ISBN 0-300-11204-1. “Order No. 227 also stipulated the capture or shooting of "cowards" and fleeing panicked troops at the rear of the blocking detachments, who in the first three months shot 1,000 penal troops and sent 24,993 more to penal battalions.[10] By October 1942, the idea of regular blocking detachments was quietly dropped[citation needed], and on 29 October 1944 Stalin officially ordered the disbanding of the units, although they continued to be utilized in a semi-official capacity until 1945.”
@@LewisB3217sure, that many were shot and that many were sent to penal battalions, but out of what amount of people that were originally stopped and arrested? I remember seeing similar statistics how over the course of three months, around 100 thousand deserters were arrested, and around 1 thousand were shot, a similar amount was sent to penal battalions and companies, and the rest were sent back.
5:00 "Not from Birmingham are you?" Bloody hell. If so, could be related to Thomas Shelby, OBE,MP. And Ollie's a Viking descendant? Perhaps Harold Hadrada...and we know how well that turned out...
While they did shoot some of their own men I always hate how that’s portrayed in movies like all soviet soldiers are cowardly. They’re some of the bravest toughest and most organised badasses of the entire war
Awww, I never knew Bill and Olly wore glasses! They're both adorable💙 Olly looked done with everybody and everything, though. So much for being 100% English😂 Also, that "Please don’t be French" made me giggle out loud.
We’re do you get your uniforms and military gear/props for these awesome vids of yours! I adore all of them very well made and funny 😂 thank you please make a new one soon 😀
*Olly and Bill when writing sketch*
Bill: Do you think anyone will pick up on the fact we're not wearing any NKVD gear?
Olly: Nah, I reckon absolutely nobody will will notice that.
Our dedicated audience: *Angry breathing noises* Anyway, don't forget to buy your MyHeritage DNA kit here: bit.ly/Squire_MH. Use the coupon code Squire for free shipping. As an added bonus, you can start a 30-day free trial of MyHeritage’s best subscription for family history research - and enjoy a 50% discount if you decide to continue it.
Hi squire
ok
I already did business with Ancestry, and it turns out that I am 20% Scottish and 20% Spanish and 20% Mesoamerican and 20% Irish and tiny percentages of other things. I know that exceeds 100% but I'm rounding the big parts up.
But of course the ancestry tubes were for spit and not Q-tips.
Ah, the sketchy site that definitely wont sell your DNA info to China or other criminals so they can modify their bioweapons to target your family specifically...
''Youre going the wrong way! The finnish line is there!
-''i thought the winter war was over''
This is the kind of comedy i want to see used in more places, good job on the pun writing
Except the joke doesn’t work because Finland went back to war when the Germans invaded the Soviet union
@@goldenfiberwheat238that's half the joke, peace was made with Finland in 1940 but following operation Barbarossa they reignited the war in order to get their land back from the Soviets.
@@generalhorse493 what’s your point?
@@goldenfiberwheat238 The war where the Finns went back to war is called the Continuation War (also known as the Second Soviet-Finnish War), not the Winter War.
@@AlexSDU what’s your point?
"off you trotsky" best pun i have ever heard.
I never heard that line
(And neither did you, if you know what's good for you)
They always have good Trotsky puns.
"We'll just urge them back towards the front, y'know, a gentle push"
"Out the window"
That had me dying XD
Edit: Mom I'm famous!!
And you will seek Me and find Me when you search for Me with all your heart. - Jeremiah 29:13
“For God so loved the world, that He gave His only Son, so that everyone who believes in Him will not perish, but have eternal life. -John 3:16
Repent therefore, and turn back, that your sins may be blotted out.
-Acts 3:19
If you’re in North America, please go check out any of the churches available to you: PCA, OPC, Rpcna/Rpc, Urcna, or a canrc church
(These are conservative and actual Presbyterian churches)
If you can’t find one of the conservative presby churches then, maybe a Lcms Lutheran church.
If you are Scottish, I recommend the Free Church of Scotland and the APC.
(Different from the Church of Scotland)
If you’re English I recommend the Evangelical Presbyterian Church in England & Wales and the Free Church of England .
(Different from the Church of England)
Also online you can look up church finders for each of the groups, it will show you locations
:)
Do you know what Stalin said in the red army it takes more courage to retreat than to go forward😂
I think Russia reinstituted that practice in the past couple of years.
In a different version Stalin supposedly said that it took a brave man to be a coward in the red army @thebig12conference73
Shouldn't you be busy navigating the 100th Bomb Group over Germany?
I might be related to him, at this rate.
@@SquireComedy as kong it isnt Dresden
And you will seek Me and find Me when you search for Me with all your heart. - Jeremiah 29:13
“For God so loved the world, that He gave His only Son, so that everyone who believes in Him will not perish, but have eternal life. -John 3:16
Repent therefore, and turn back, that your sins may be blotted out.
-Acts 3:19
If you’re in North America, please go check out any of the churches available to you: PCA, OPC, Rpcna/Rpc, Urcna, or a canrc church
(These are conservative and actual Presbyterian churches)
If you can’t find one of the conservative presby churches then, maybe a Lcms Lutheran church.
If you are Scottish, I recommend the Free Church of Scotland and the APC.
(Different from the Church of Scotland)
If you’re English I recommend the Evangelical Presbyterian Church in England & Wales and the Free Church of England .
(Different from the Church of England)
Also online you can look up church finders for each of the groups, it will show you locations
:)
@@no-nonseplayer6612🦙
@@SquireComedy🦙
I absolutely love him starting off with debunking the rumor of the Soviets having no guns right off the bat, shows Squire is a true history enjoyer
It’s comical how Company of Heroes 2 can takes its self so seriously while basing its whole plot on debunked myths
Straight out of enemy at the gates
And yet gives machine guns to the blocking detachment
@@Vernand1 They probably just wanted to play with a Maxim. Can you blame them?
My great grandpa was in stalingrad in ww2, he said that half the soilders had no rifles and just ran into the front to die with nothing in hand.
The craftsmanship on these cardboard weapons is truly exceptional.
I've never seen crafts like this
Russia lost 8,000,000 people [shudder] in WW 2, the largest of any country or group.
the ending was brilliant! its just lather-rinse-repeat with how the wars are fought there
That was a great twist! Lol
*Somber voice* “We are receiving news that a second T-34 has just hit the Ukrainian front lines… Aaaaaand it has broken down. It’s been abandoned.”
"We are the most english channel on UA-cam"
The Spiffing Brit: "Hold my Yorkshire tea"
Squire is superior
@@samholdsworth420depends how you measure it. Nobody breaks games while drinking Yorkshire Golden, like Spiff does. He does not do much LARPING though.
@@PalleRasmussen he's not bad I just prefer squire
@@samholdsworth420 they do different things. I will occasionally peruse both, depending on what the video is on.
Squire auperior.
Holy shit the ending 😂😂
Cheers mate! We enjoy your stuff!
@@SquireComedy likewise! Somehow haven't seen your content untill now, binge watching it all 😂😂
I'm waiting for the JunkyardDigs and Square collaboration. Hopefully involving getting an old Churchill tank to start for the first time in 70 years or so.
The idea of a cheery office humor type NKVD officer is too hilarious
Also being typical Jew.
"Don't run or desert, have fun and stay alert" XD
The evolution of this channel from cardboard guns to real ones or at least realistic props of weaponry has been a pleasure to observe
Russian Commissar 1942: “We don’t want to get a reputation for shooting our men”.
Russian Commissar 1941: Too late
I love how Squires Commissar is basically woke. “It’s combat intolerant not cowardice.”
Order 227 was in 1942 not 1941.
@@nikitakuznetsov8446But that didn’t stop many commissars from taking initiative
@@TeaTimeWithTommy How do you know? You knowledge about Soviet Union in WWII seams ridicules.
@@ГригорийШумилов-ф5р Given the reputation of the USSR, NKVD, and the Political Officers... its a safe assumption.
“Uhm’s not a date let me get my list” Genius 😂
It's a blessing when Squire uploads, finally a video that can scratch my itch for prefect English humour.
Or is it a Scandinavian and Welsh mix....
Squire, how the hell have you gotten a PM M1910?
Russian war trophy.
🙋🏻♂️🙋🏻♂️🙋🏻♂️
@@SquireComedylmfao
@@SquireComedy which Russian war specifically?
@@joedingo7022yes
I thought the best part was during the “get ready, set” start, when he says “set” he waives the pistol AT the men as a little psychological signal. Hilarious.
"I'm Welsh"
I expected him to stop the car and tell Bill to get out. ^^
"I'm gonna report you to your superior!"
*the light faded from the NKVD-Mans eyes*
Unrealistic, the Tiger didn't spontaneously combust upon the tracks being jammed.
Yeah typically combusted before the tracks fell off
at least not in 1942...
No you see intestines have a certain special cooling effect on German transmissions - very well known among the Soviet Navy but hadn't yet made its way to the NKVD office due to very literal translations of German documents
Plot twist, jamming the tracks actually did nothing because the Tiger had already broken down in that spot anyway 😂
In American movies it's all it takes.
I love that maxim machinegunner is named maxim, its refrence to old soviet warsong called "tale of the two maxims'. Chorus goes hard "tak tak tak goes maxim, tak tak tak replies the machinegunner"
Very good video comrade squire I enjoyed it alot!
Glad to hear it!
I think squire has quite a charisma as a soviet commissar
I love the dedication Squire has for their fans. The time they must put in reading all of the comments and answering them is really inspiring to me
Sorry the ending when I saw the green uniforms I knew exactly what you were presenting. Made me laugh so hard.
i didn't 😂can you explain to me pls?
@@Eric0225 Modern day Russian army uniforms are green like that. So it was a old man from WWII being conscripted into the modern Russian army to fight in Ukraine. Russian soldiers have the nickname of Little Green Men (Aliens) or more commonly Orcs as a result.
@@Alte.KameradenSilly nickname, thats like calling US soldiers fuckin tusken raiders cuz they wore desert camo
@@SirCabooseCCCP Well, the Little Green Men started during the 2014 invasion when unmarked uniformed Russian soldiers crossed the border along side a Pro Russian militia force, as they darted across Ukraine to occupy Crimea. Since they didn't "officially" exist, they were called Little Green Men because they'd just walk around towns/cities with no markings.
Orcs is kind of the post 2022 Nickname after Russia's 2nd invasion of the country. Kind of a moral boost defending Helms Deep and all that.
But their Green Uniforms is the catalyst of the nicknames.
@@Alte.Kameradenwell, there is also all the raping, torturing, pillaging and murder, as well as the punishment of your own troops by torture, and the Chechen blocking detachments shooting retreating soldiers having a slight influence on that nickname I would say. Not to mention the deliberate targeting of schools, kindergartens, hospitals, maternity wards, shopping malls and apartment buildings rather than military targets. And the tactics and strategy. And also the country being a totalitarian shithole falling apart and hell to live in as soon as you leave the two major cities.
Man squire keeps the tradition of soviets having English accents in western war movies . Love it .
5:50 "please dont be french" so relatable!
Edit: the machingunner is also very relatable with his comments :D
You guys are absolute legends , this sort of dark humour in each vid makes me laugh so much, keep them coming lads
No idea how I had never heard of this channel before. Great work, gave me a good laugh.
The British guy is the trolley here
As a Russian citizen with degree in Soviet history, I suggest you get blue collar (NKVD) cap for portraying barrier troops. Overall great and funny, as usual
'A gentle push'
'Out the windows yea?'
🤣🤣🤣
Good god, that twist at the end. Nearly spat out my cereal... Good job xD
Lol , the twist at the end has cinematic universe potential
Off your Trotsky 😂
From Soviet Union to Today Russia. I think you have done a beautiful work, an amazing display of what satire is. Thank you.
This is awesome. Been hoping for new vids. Cheers guys.
"Off you, Trotsky" I choked on my coffee 😂
Keep up the good work guys. Thanks. Another great video.
I know it's a comedy and they're not loaded, but the way Oliver always waves his guns around and flags everyone continually makes me nervous. 😂 But that's just me picking nits.
Love the video, as always.
Accurate peak soviet training.
Squire the _second_ Russian in history to believe in trigger discipline.
To answer the officers question “when was Stalin born?” He was born on December 18, 1878
water-cooled machineguns actually had better rate of fire, the reason they got discontinued is that they can’t be moved that easily, making manouver/encirclements more difficult
Now this is how you watch history! Man I love your channel, I reckon I'll spend the whole day binge watching your skits
Another great video. You guys are fun to watch..
"Oh, there we go, the Tiger is loosing traction 'cause all of the intestines"
This channel has grown so much, they’ve started setting up sequels at the ends of videos.
HAHAHAHA he has an original Bulgarian tunic from the 1980s. How do i know that? Because i own one. 0:40
We took inspo from Enemy at the gates. :)
The window joke had me in stitches
Might be your best sketch yet.
'NKVD Ombudsman' - brilliant!
I really like how Jingles always plays these "old fella at the front" roles and doesn't seem to ever mind that he's only 26 and maybe getting SLIGHTLY negged by said casting.
The end, it killed me... 🤣
Great Content as always!
"If we were going to commit state-sponsored murder," the soldier said in the middle of a war
I love that the pinned comment immediately addressed my first complaint lol good on you lads! Absolutely loved this. Much respect from America.
Glad you said it was 1942 I thought this was modern day
💀
At the end of the video it is modern day heh.
Given the state of Putin's army I don't blame you at all.
More like ww1 with drone
"probably"
Soviet blocking detachments actually did not generally gun down retreating troops. They'd usually stop them and send the officers to a penal battalion and the men back to the front. Sometimes officers would be summarily executed for cowardice but bodies are not an unlimited resource and the Soviets were keenly aware of this in 1942.
It's just a joke based on a trope, dude.
NKVD blocking detachments shot 1000 soldiers and sent 25k more to penal battalions in the first three months after Order No.227
@@LewisB3217 They were like regular MPs.
@@AudieHolland not really, no, that was a direct quote. From Roberts, Geoffrey (2006). Stalin's Wars: From World War to Cold War, 1939-1953. Yale University Press. p. 132. ISBN 0-300-11204-1.
“Order No. 227 also stipulated the capture or shooting of "cowards" and fleeing panicked troops at the rear of the blocking detachments, who in the first three months shot 1,000 penal troops and sent 24,993 more to penal battalions.[10] By October 1942, the idea of regular blocking detachments was quietly dropped[citation needed], and on 29 October 1944 Stalin officially ordered the disbanding of the units, although they continued to be utilized in a semi-official capacity until 1945.”
@@LewisB3217sure, that many were shot and that many were sent to penal battalions, but out of what amount of people that were originally stopped and arrested? I remember seeing similar statistics how over the course of three months, around 100 thousand deserters were arrested, and around 1 thousand were shot, a similar amount was sent to penal battalions and companies, and the rest were sent back.
Love your skits
Very impressed with our video, Comrades!
daaaaaaamn, that end, guys you are freaking hilarious
That ending had me in stitches! BZ to yet another fantastic sketch!
the cg budget for the age up at the end must have been enormous which means the best
That ending 😂
2:26 The winter war is over isnt it though. Never watch squire while you eating.
Or drinking
The state sposored muder part got me dying considering the past few years.
Advert right in the middle of the video is quite jarring, it would flow better if it were at the beginning or end imo
Squire:
Come for the history, stay for the very British humor!
Well done lads, much love from across the pond 🇺🇸
Awesome video could you do every English soldier at Waterloo and maybe one 1776 , every German in Stalingrad.
When you’re so early that the thumbnail is still in 240p
the ending though 🤣
“chucking them out of a five story window and making it look like an accident” just like spider man 😂
Great video as always
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂. OMG I hurt so bad from laughing 😂😂😂 you guys are absolutely fantastic
Quick question. Can you tell me where you get your props and uniforms from?
3 hours away? thats a nice day trip
new video, yay!!
Quite!
It's one of your best scripts yet, this is. Yes, sir. Indeed.
Crazy but Fun to Watch!
Amazing vid guys lets keep it this way!
5:00 "Not from Birmingham are you?" Bloody hell. If so, could be related to Thomas Shelby, OBE,MP. And Ollie's a Viking descendant? Perhaps Harold Hadrada...and we know how well that turned out...
Who else couldn't keep their laugh when he explained the sausage joke? 😂
I love that they don’t even try to do an accent
You know the fucking comedy is good when the jokes start to blend and could be said in either uniform...or a black suit with an earpiece lol
While they did shoot some of their own men I always hate how that’s portrayed in movies like all soviet soldiers are cowardly. They’re some of the bravest toughest and most organised badasses of the entire war
YESS NEW VID
Yeeeees
Excellent job of camouflaging yourself Commissar. No one would suspect you’re NKVD without the dark blue piping and facings.
I love your vids man
Hey Squire, sorry to bother, when you were in Sweden was that Laith, the Social Streamers? Love y'all.
Awww, I never knew Bill and Olly wore glasses! They're both adorable💙 Olly looked done with everybody and everything, though. So much for being 100% English😂 Also, that "Please don’t be French" made me giggle out loud.
We’re do you get your uniforms and military gear/props for these awesome vids of yours! I adore all of them very well made and funny 😂 thank you please make a new one soon 😀
Apparently they're cardboard props
I've also watched "Enemy at the gates".
That twist was too funny. 10/10
for the next video make the every Brazilian soldier in italy in 1944 please
Apparently Soviet Commissars wore Bulgarian Cold War era uniforms which are very different in color from Soviet uniforms.
luv you guys!
I was fully expecting a tired old "there's no more, you're rather stuck" joke, that still would have been funny. But I was pleasantly surprised.
Great channel.
Very good video comrade!